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Woman 'spikes' all of her friends' drinks at  party to make a serious point about safety

via Shiraah Benarde (used with permission)

Shiraah Benarde spikes drinks at a party,

A new video by TikTok user Shiraah Benarde is a fun way of exposing a serious problem that countless people face when going to bars, nightclubs, or even a friend’s party. It’s a lot easier than most people think to have their drink spiked, especially when you’re not taking any precautions.

Benarde is the CEO of NightCap, which makes products that prevent people from having their drinks spiked.

In the video, Benarde has several gummy candies and Pixy Sticks at a house party. Throughout the video, she drops them into people’s drinks when they aren’t paying attention without getting caught.

“Pregames and private parties are a false sense of security. You don’t expect anything to happen, but it does,” she captioned the video.

@shiraah

With everything going on with #diddy right now, this is do important to remember. Do not let your guard down even at a private party. #diddyparty #drinkspikingprevention #spiked

Benrade’s experiment is even more eye-opening because it happens at a friend’s house, a place where most people wouldn’t assume they’d have their drink spiked. However, it often occurs in places where people feel like no one would ever tamper with their drink. In this type of situation, the person who spiked the drink could fall victim to someone they trust to take of them in a drugged state.

There are many reasons why people spike drinks, the most common being to render the victim defenseless against sexual assault or robbery. Drink-spiking has also been tied to abuse or dangerous pranks.

It can be tough to know the difference between the effects of alcohol and a doctored drink, but here are some warning signs, according to NBC News.

  • You may feel drowsy and nauseated
  • Your cheeks may feel flushed
  • You may feel like your body temperature has gone up
  • You may feel sexually aroused
  • You may feel like you've had many more drinks than you've consumed
  • You may start staggering and have an unsteady gait



Given that many people don’t tell the authorities that they’ve had their drink spiked it’s hard to know how often it happens. A 2016 study of 6,000 students at 3 American universities found that nearly 8% thought they had been slipped something in a drink at one point in their lives. Another 1% admitted that they had spiked someone’s drink.

Benarde says that she made the TikTok video to remind everyone of the dangers of having their drink spiked at a time when sexual assault is making headlines. “With everything going on with #diddy right now, this is so important to remember. Do not let your guard down even at a private party,” she writes in the video’s caption. Sean Combs, a.k.a P. Diddy, was recently accused by over 120 people of sexual assault, some of whom claim they were drugged.

Many of the 200,000-plus people who’ve seen the video thought it was a great way to show how easy it is to have your drink spiked and to encourage people to be more cautious. “This is a good video. You really don’t think it’s this easy! Especially when you trust someone. I got roofied by someone close to me who I trusted,” one commenter wrote. “Honestly, this is a fun way to teach your friends to pay attention to their drinks,” another added.

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Health

6 tips for a successful and satisfying Dry January

More and more young people are planning to ring in the new year by cutting out alcohol for a month.

fauxels/Canva

Millions if Americans will be toasting the new year without alcohol.

The Dry January challenge as we know it has around since the early 2000s, but the idea of taking a break from alcohol the first month of the year actually has its roots in World War II. To save resources, the Finnish government initiated “Raitis Januar,” or Sober January, in 1942, encouraging people to stop drinking alcohol entirely for at least that one month.

The modern Dry January has become more and more popular as people recognize the health benefits of abstaining from alcohol and acknowledge the impulse to cut back after the indulgent holidays. According to the American Association for Cancer Research, 19% of millennials, 14% of Gen Xers 12% of baby boomers say they plan to participate in Dry January 2024. That's about 31 million Americans.

Some people find it easy to stop drinking for a month, while others find it more challenging. If you're going to try to have a Dry January, here are some tips for a successful and satisfying month.

Get clear on your 'why' and remind yourself of it often.

If you've decided to try Dry January, there must be a reason. Maybe you're on a mission to take better care of your body. Maybe you're questioning your relationship with alcohol. Maybe you feel like it's a good self-discipline exercise. Maybe you read the WHO statement that no amount of alcohol can be considered safe or healthy.

Whatever your "why" is, keep it front and center in your mind—maybe even write it down someplace—so that you can call on it if or when you're tempted to drink.

Find some yummy substitutes for your favorite drinks.

When you're trying to cut something out, it can be helpful to have something to replace it with. Decide ahead of time what you're going to order in a restaurant instead of wine or a beer. Lots of establishments offer non-alcoholic alternatives to those things, but you might also just choose a favorite soda or even just water. It's just good to go in with a plan, rather than relying on whatever sounds good in the moment because what sounds good in the moment will likely be the alcohol drink you'd normally get.

You might even decide to treat yourself to a yummy mocktail so that you don't feel like you're missing out on the festive element of drinking. Mocktails have grown in popularity so it's not an unusual request.

Read other people’s success stories.

Sometimes a little inspiration can be helpful, so reading about other people who've successfully completed a Dry January can help.There are plenty of success stories from people who have done Dry January at least once, but many who have done it each year. Testimonials like these ones from a Reddit thread can help keep you going:

"It was worth it. It was an effort to drink less, lose weight, sleep better. I lost 4 lbs, slept better, and generally had more energy and focus in the morning."

"I’ve done it the past few years and love it. Honestly the hard part is the social side and less the alcohol side. I love a beer or a whiskey when hanging but the value of a clear head in the morning is increasing with my age. I find a reset helps me temper how much I drink in general. Like, the casual couch drink on a Tuesday goes away for a while after Jan. since it’s pretty worthless."

Track how you feel (especially after the first week, which might suck).

One of the things people who complete Dry January often share is how much better they physically feel. Better sleep, less grogginess, more energy, better digestion, lowered blood pressure, weight loss and more are commonly reported. Some people experience these benefits right away, but for someit might take a bit to feel those benefits as your body adjusts to not processing alcohol. Stick with it and pay attention to how your body and brain feel without it as you go through the month.

(A word of warning: Alcohol Withdrawal Syndrome can occur in heavy drinkers who stop suddenly and can be dangerous, so watch for symptoms that are concerning. According to Harvard Health, mild withdrawal symptoms include anxiety, shaky hands, headache, nausea, vomiting, sweating, and insomnia. Severe symptoms can include hallucinations, delirium, racing heart rate, and fever, and often occur within two or three days after you stop drinking. Seek medical assistance immediately if you experience symptoms of alcohol withdrawal.)


Make it a group effort.

You can go through Dry January alone, but you probably don't have to. Who among your friends and family might want to do it with you? Even if you find just a couple of people who agree to support you, that can make a big difference in how you feel about the challenge. Not drinking for a whole month can be hard if alcohol is a regular part of your life, especially your social life. Ask for help from your loved ones to provide non-alcoholic alternatives and not to put any pressure on you to drink, and if anyone is available and willing to do it with you, all the better.

If you slip up, don’t quit, just pick back up the next day.

The beauty of sobriety is that it truly is a daily (or hourly, or minute-by-minute) choice, so if you do find yourself with a drink in your hand, you haven't ruined anything. Just pick it back up the next day and move forward. No need to beat yourself up. No need to give up completely.

For some people, Dry January is a welcome break for overall wellness. Others find it eye-opening when it's a lot harder than they anticipated and use it as a wake-up call that leads to life-changing—and in some cases, life-saving—shifts in alcohol use.

Dry January may not be everyone's cup of tea, but it can be a great tool to throw into your health and wellness toolbox if you're up for it.

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Health

All hail the mocktail: Growing demand makes non-alcoholic socializing a lot more fun

Sober bars and events are growing in popularity with delicious, grown-up alternatives to alcohol.

Photo by Blake Wisz on Unsplash

Non-alcoholic drinks go way beyond club sodas and Shirley Temples.

For as long as there's been alcohol, there have been people who don't drink it. Some don't care for the taste, some don't like the buzz, some have religious prohibitions against it and some are recovering addicts who need to avoid it altogether.

Whatever reasons people have for not drinking, there's an unspoken attitude by some that they're missing out on a key part of social culture, especially when countless movies and TV shows portrays people winding down (or wooing one another) with wine and bonding over beers at bars. There's an air of camaraderie over sharing a cocktail or clinking champagne flutes together that's hard to capture with a basic Coke or sparkling water.

But what if you want that fun, social atmosphere without the alcohol? What if you want to go out and have fancy, alcohol-free drinks with your friends at night without being surrounded by drunk people? Where do you go for that?

Big cities like New York and Los Angeles have seen non-alcoholic options increasing on menus for a while, but the trend has spread to smaller cities and expanded to full bars, pop-up events and retail shops dedicated to sober drinking.

In fact, the Mindful Drinking Fest held on January 21 in Washington D.C. was sold out, as over 300 attendees sampled all manner of non-alcoholic beers, wines and mixed drinks. One of the event's organizers, award-winning bartender Derek Brown, told NPR that not drinking isn't actually new. Early bartending manuals all included plenty of non-alcoholic drinks, but post-Prohibition, the temperance movement took a hit. "People stopped treating people who don't drink alcohol like adults," he said.

Now temperance appears to be making a comeback with the younger generations of adults. A 2016 Heineken survey discovered that 75% of Millennials purposefully limited their alcohol intake on nights out, and Gen Zers across high-income Western nations are reportedly drinking far less than their elders. According to The Conversation, there's a handful of reasons younger folks are far more "sober curious" than their parents were, including a sense of responsibility about their futures, greater consciousness about wellness, a better understanding of the health risks of even small amounts of alcohol and shifting attitudes about what's cool.

But young folks aren't the only ones hopping on the sobriety train. Even as the pandemic saw a spike in heavy drinking, it also caused a lot of people to examine their relationship with alcohol. With annual traditions like "Dry January" and "Sober October" growing in popularity, people are at least trying out the alcohol-free life for a while—what Brown refers to as an "alcoholiday."

This growing demand for alternatives to alcohol is driving alcohol-free establishments with clever names such as Absence of Proof, Sans Bar, Spirited Away and more to pop up all over the place. And we're not just talking about Shirley Temples or virgin daiquiris here. Today's alcohol-free mixed drinks are far more sophisticated, with new distilled spirits, bitters, and other ingredients creating complex flavors without a sickeningly high sugar content.

Abby Ehmann owned a regular bar in New York and enjoyed her regular customers, but also saw the devasting impacts alcohol had on some of her patrons. So she opened a sober bar named Hekate in 2022. "I wanted to create that sort of vibe and community for people, but take alcohol out of the equation," she told NBC News. "Here we have the community and the vibe without the booze."

The culture around drinking is slowly but surely changing, and the success of events like the Mindful Drinking Fest and sober bars seems to be proving that alcohol isn't the necessary social lubricant many believe it to be.

As Brown told NPR, "All the positive emotions we associate with alcohol—they come from just being with people and tasting delicious, wonderful things," he said. "You don't really need alcohol."

Cheers to that.

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Mom calls out 'dirtbag drivers' like her son after he killed five people drunk driving

SOURCE: YOU CHOOSE / MELISSA MCGUINNESS

Mother speaks out about drunk driving.

This article originally appeared on September 13, 2019


Losing a child is a pain that many of us simply cannot comprehend. Given how much mothers and fathers love their sons and daughters, we can only begin to imagine how much pain they would feel when something terrible happens to their children. But for Melissa Hayes-McGuinness, a mom from Australia, the pain is even greater.

Her son, Jordan, died in a car crash in December 2012 at the age of 18. As did five other people who were unfortunate enough to cross Jordan when he was drink and drug driving at high speeds down a Gold Coast highway following a Christmas party. The five victims were sitting in a broken-down car waiting for help when Jordan collided with them at speeds of up to 87 miles per hour.

The sheer force of the crash caused the parked car to burst into flames. The only survivor was the 16-year-old driver of the parked car, who had to climb over his friends to escape the burning vehicle and suffered from severe burns and a head injury that still affects his memory to this day.

Among those killed in the parked car were a 20 and 23-year-old, their 15-month-old girl was orphaned. The other victims were 16, 17, and 18.

SOURCE: YOU CHOOSE / MELISSA MCGUINNESS

As you can imagine, Melissa has to deal with unimaginable grief on a daily basis. Not only for her son, but for those he killed, and those they left behind. But thankfully, Melissa has found a way to channel that grief positively. Every year, she travels across Australia speaking to teenagers about road safety. As part of her talks, she reads an incredibly powerful speech which she calls "Jordan's confession."

Her speech reads, in part:

"I would give anything that night to have just hit a tree and not left this horrendous legacy," Melissa begins. "Those kids didn't deserve what happened to them. In truth, I guess I did."

"I screwed up and paid the ultimate price. What I did was unforgivable," McGuinness continues, speaking on behalf of her son and addressing the orphaned girl, "I'm the reason you'll never see your mummy and daddy [again]."

Throughout the speech, Melissa shows photos of her son, including on his last day of school. Then, the photos changed to a news clip of the accident, showing blue flashing lights and twisted metal.

"Jordan was smart. Jordan was funny. Jordan was a great person, but none of that means anything now. None of it," McGuinness continues to tell the teenagers sitting in silence before her, many of whom are usually crying at this point.

"That's because he defined himself by his choices that night. He shaped a terrible and permanent legacy for himself, his family and his victims' families because he chose to drink, smoke [marijuana] and speed down that highway."

"And everything he did before that just pales in comparison."

"As much as there are hundreds of reasons to be proud of Jordan... he died in shame," his mother tells them, "This is how he's going to be remembered. There's no getting around that.

"My husband and I did not raise him to think that drink or drug driving was acceptable behavior, yet I stand up here as the mother of a kid responsible for the death of four kids from drinking and drug driving."

"Think of all the good stuff that you've done. Think of all the effort you've put into your life. Think of all the effort people who have loved you put into your life. And imagine all of that being wiped out by one stupid choice. Because that's the brutal reality of what happens."

"I still love Jordan profoundly, I miss him terribly... but this can't be sugarcoated. He defined himself permanently by his actions that night.

"There are accidents and there are choices. Jordan didn't have an accident that night. That's what happened to his victims. Jordan made a choice."

SOURCE: YOU CHOOSE / MELISSA MCGUINNESS

​Melissa affectionately calls the teenagers she's talking to, particularly boys, "dirtbags." Why? Because they often think they're "ten foot tall and bullet-proof."

Following the death of her son and his victims, Melissa started the You Choose - Youth Road Safety campaign. It teaches young drivers about the devastating, life-long consequences of being reckless behind the wheel.

Melissa knew that most teenagers won't learn anything through a lecture, so instead, she channels her own grief by telling her own story.

"I'm not lecturing them about right or wrong, I'm demonstrating through actual lived experience what it's like to be on the receiving-end of what I was," Melissa told Yahoo News.

"I show them a clip from Jordan's memorial ceremony and I ask them to imagine while they're watching it what it might be like if their family was in the same predicament that my family's [going through]."

"But pretty much just taking them on this entire grief journey from where it started—as the excited teenager about to start his life to the horrible accident through one stupid choice one night. Then what it looked like for everybody else involved."

"The thing with... Jordan is he's relatable because he's just like any other kid there that's sitting in that auditorium... and I'm also relatable as the mum."

"[Through Jordan they're shown] this great kid that made this one stupid choice that could be any of those kids. Any of them."

Melissa says her talks are so powerful because she's the "perpetrator's mother."

The guilt of her son's actions have weighed so heavily on Melissa that she often felt like she "didn't have a right to grieve her son".

"Those kids were innocent kids, they were doing nothing wrong and my son behaved 100 percent irresponsibly and was completely responsible for their deaths."

SOURCE: YOU CHOOSE / MELISSA MCGUINNESS

Each time Melissa talks to a group of kids, it gets a little easier for her. It gets easier to watch footage from the crash, and somehow, it gets easier to watch footage of Jordan's then 10-year-old sister breaking down at the memorial service.

But one thing doesn't change. The reaction from the kids she's speaking to. Melissa says that no matter the type of school or the age of the kids, with very little encouragement, the kids always swarm her with hugs at the end of her speech. In most instances, she says, the instigator is usually the "biggest dirtbag in the room"

"I have a remarkable story to tell. It's the worst story. And I feel really compelled to share that with teenage kids," she told 9now.

"This is what is left behind: Here is the mum that has to attend your funeral, has to pick up the pieces. That car can become your own coffin."

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