Tod Perry

  • Teacher of the year explains why he’s leaving his district in landmark 3-minute speech
    Photo credit: Image via YouTube Former teacher of the year Lee Allen
    ,

    Teacher of the year explains why he’s leaving his district in landmark 3-minute speech

    “I’m leaving in hopes that I can regain the ability to do the job that I love.”

    For all of our disagreements in modern American life, there are at least a few things most of us can agree on. One of those is the need for reform in public education. We don’t all agree on the solutions but many of the challenges are undeniable: retaining great teachers, reducing classroom size and updating the focus of student curriculums to reflect the ever-changing needs of a globalized workforce.

    And while parents, politicians and activists debate those remedies, one voice is all-too-often ignored: that of teachers themselves. This is why a short video testimony from a teacher in the Atlanta suburb of Gwinnett County went viral. After all, it’s hard to deny the points made by someone who was just named teacher of the year and used the occasion to announce why he will be leaving the very school district that just honored him with that distinction.

    In a video carried by Fox5 Atlanta, 2022 Gwinnett County Public Schools Teacher of the Year Lee Allen breaks down what he sees as the overriding problems in the county’s school system. While his comments are specific to that of Gwinnett County, it’s virtually impossible to not see the overlap across all of America and how the problems have only grown more challenging in the years since.

    What Lee Allen said about leaving

    “At the end of this year, I will be leaving Gwinnett County Schools, leaving behind the opportunity to submit for state teacher of the year, roughly $10,000 in salary, and most importantly, the students and colleagues I’ve built strong relationships with,” Allen, a math teacher at Lawrenceville’s Archer High School, says at the beginning of his remarks. “I’m leaving in hopes that I can regain the ability to do the job that I love.”

    Normally, one might assume teacher pay is the overriding issue for educators like Allen. But he makes it clear that he is, in fact, leaving money on the table to avoid what he deems as unacceptable changes to the student body and how the district manages its teachers and the learning environment.

    Four big problems that pushed a Teacher of the Year out the door

    • “First issue at hand is student apathy and disrespect for school rules and norms. … We have an alarming number of students that simply do not care about learning and refuse to even try.”
    • “We are also experiencing incredible disrespect and refusal to follow basic school rules. There is little to no accountability or expectation for grades or behavior placed on students or parents. Rather than being asked what the student can do to improve their understanding, teachers are expected to somehow do more with less student effort.”
    • “Cell phone use. Teachers simply cannot compete with the billions of dollars tech companies pour into addicting people to their devices. Phones allow constant communication, often being the spark that fuels fights, drug use and other inappropriate meetups throughout the day. We need a comprehensive district plan with support behind it in order to combat this epidemic and protect the learning environment.”
    • “Lastly, there is a huge disconnect between administrators and teachers. The classroom in 2022 is drastically different from just three years ago. Most administrators have not been in a classroom full-time in years or even decades. Many teachers do not feel understood, valued or trusted as professionals from administrators and the decisions that they make.”

    While Allen points fingers at administrators and student behavior, he also says that the pressures put on both students and teachers alike by COVID-19 had a catastrophic impact on learning. “The pandemic has acted as a catalyst and turned a slow negative trend into an exponential crisis,” he says.

    His suggestions for fixing the problem

    But he also offers some solutions, stating, “I won’t list complaints without offering ideas for improvement.”

    • All administrators should spend at least one week in a high needs classroom, “without a suit, without people knowing your title and in the same room, all day, for an entire week.”
    • Prioritizing smaller class sizes.
    • Greater transparency from the district in terms of needs and expectations and goals.

    “We all want the same thing and we cannot accomplish this without supporting one another,” he says near the end of his remarks.

    With hundreds of thousands of views, it’s clear his remarks resonated with people well beyond his school district.

    There’s almost nothing more important than how we educate our children. And while the national political debate centers on areas of far less importance generated to gin up controversy and campaign fundraising, it’s families and local leaders who will need to do the heavy lifting of reprioritizing the fundamental principles of learning and leadership if we want an American educational system that can compete on the global stage. After all, when literal award-winning educators like Allen are walking away, it’s clear something more needs to be done.

    This article originally appeared five years ago. It has been updated.

  • Diver convinces a tiny octopus to trade a plastic cup for a shell in Pixar-worthy video
    Photo credit: Pall Sigurdsson/YouTubePlastic is a problem for ocean wildlife.
    ,

    Diver convinces a tiny octopus to trade a plastic cup for a shell in Pixar-worthy video

    The cup wasn’t a safe choice, but the little cephalopod was stubborn.

    Sometimes taking care of our beautiful home planet looks like big, broad policies tackling issues like plastic pollution and habitat destruction. And sometimes it looks like taking the time to help one tiny creature stuck in an environmental bind.

    In a YouTube video that’s been viewed a whopping 20 million times, we see an example of the latter in action as some kind and compassionate divers attempt to convince an octopus to abandon the plastic cup it’s using for protection and trade it for a sturdy shell. Pall Sigurdsson has shared dozens of underwater videos on YouTube, but watching this particular video from his dive off the coast of Lembeh, Indonesia, in 2018 almost feels like watching a Pixar short film.

    “We spent a whole dive and most of our air saving this octopus from what was bound to be a cruel fate,” Sigurdsson wrote in the description of the video.

    “The coconut octopus, also known as veined octopus, is born with the instinct to protect itself by creating a mobile home out of coconut or clam shells. This particular individual however has been trapped by their instincts and have made a home out of a plastic cup they found underwater.”

    Why a plastic cup is so dangerous for an octopus

    It’s not just that the flimsy plastic cup didn’t provide the octopus adequate protection. Sigurdsson explained that a predator like an eel or a flounder would probably end up swallowing the cup with the octopus in it, likely killing both of them. Plus, even if the octopus abandoned the cup on its own, plastic simply doesn’t belong in the ocean.

    plastic in the ocean, plastic pollution, ocean wildlife

    Plastic doesn’t belong in the ocean. Photo credit: Canva

    “We tried for a long time to give it shells hoping that it would trade the shell,” he wrote. “Coconut octopus are famous for being very picky about which shells they keep so we had to try with many different shells before it found one to be acceptable.”

    The tentacles reaching out to test the weight of each shell, the divers searching for more options to offer it, the suspense of wondering whether the octopus really would abandon its pathetic plastic pollution protection… it’s just too much.

    Sigurdsson’s other underwater videos are also fun to watch. He shared one of another veined octopus who seemed to have no interest in him but became intrigued with his diver friend, Gary. The way it reaches out to touch just the tip of his finger and then shyly retreats feels like such a clear communication with no words being said.

    Just how smart are octopuses?

    Perhaps it is the fact that an octopus has nine brains that make them far more intelligent than anyone would have guessed before we started studying their behavior in earnest. They are known to solve puzzles, escape complicated mazes and traps, and take apart just about anything. It does make you wonder what these little guys were thinking when these divers were interacting with them. Was it curiosity? Judgment? An attempt at connection between species?

    It’s funny how one small interaction in one tiny portion of the vast ocean can say so much about us, for better and for worse. Human pollution is an enormous problem and saving one little octopus won’t save the world, but it sure gives us hope and motivation to keep trying for the sake of the vast number of creatures that live in the ocean as well as our own.

    You can find more underwater videos of ocean wildlife from Pall Sigurdsson on YouTube.

    This article originally appeared five years ago. It has been updated.

     

  • Former Levi’s CEO Chip Bergh settled the debate on how often you should wash your jeans
    Photo credit: via Levi Strauss and Ricardo Gomez Angel/Unsplash Levi's CEO Charles Bergh settles the jean washing debate

    Social media has become a fertile breeding ground for conversations about hygiene. Whether it’s celebrities bragging about how little their family bathes, or battles over how often people should wash their sheets or bras, there’s no shortage of strong opinions.

    One of the debates that gets the most diverse responses is how often people wash their denim jeans.

    Denim atelier Benjamin Talley Smith tells TODAY that jeans should be washed “as little as possible, if at all.” Laundry expert Patric Richardson adds they should be cleaned “after nine or 10 wearings, like to me, that is the ideal.” At that point, they probably have stains and are “a little sweaty by that point, so you need to wash ’em,” Richardson says.

    Still, some people wash and dry them after every wear while others will hand wash and never hang dry. With all these significant differences of opinion, there must be a correct answer somewhere, right?

    What the former Levi’s CEO says about washing jeans

    The former CEO of Levi Strauss, Chip Bergh, has stepped up to set the record straight on when and how to wash your jeans. He caused a stir in 2014 when he said he only washes his jeans once a year, but it was for environmental reasons more than hygiene.

    He later clarified his thoughts in a blog post, “The Dirty Jean Manifesto” he posted to LinkedIn.

    “I made this provocative statement because I believe strongly in what our brands stand for: quality, durability and lasting products made sustainably. I also said it because I believe we don’t need to wash jeans as often as most people think we do,” Bergh wrote.

    “We learned that an average pair of jeans consumes roughly 3,500 liters of water — and that is after only two years of use, washing the jeans once a week,” Bergh wrote. “Nearly half of the total water consumption, or 1,600 liters, is the consumer throwing the jeans in the washing machine. That’s equivalent to 6,700 glasses of drinking water!”

    To add to the problem, denim jeans are often manufactured in places where water is scarce, such as India, Pakistan, Mexico, China and parts of California.

    CEO offers clarification on his comments

    Bergh spoke with CNBC’s Christine Tan and clarified his thoughts on jean cleanliness.

    “True denim heads, people that really love their denim, will tell you to never put your denim into a washing machine. So that’s what I do,” Bergh explained. “If I drop some curry on my jeans, I’m gonna clean it. But I’ll spot-clean it. And if they get really gross you know, if I’ve been out sweating or something and they get really gross, I’ll wash them in the shower.”

    However, when Bergh washes his jeans in the shower, he does it while wearing them and washing them with soap. The image that the scene conjures is of a cowboy bathing in a cartoon, clothes on and all.

    There are a lot of different opinions on how often one should wash and dry their jeans and many of them boil down to personal preference. But the debate on the topic has brought up one very big point we should all consider: when choosing how often we wash our jeans, a big part of the decision should be considering the amount of water we use.

    This article originally appeared three years ago. It has been updated.

  • Couple buys new house and finds abandoned dog tied to a tree
    Photo credit: CanvaRepresentative Image: Who can say no to a pit pup?

    Molly, an adorable, affectionate 10-year-old pit bull, found herself tied to a tree after her owners had abandoned her. According to The Dodo, Molly had “always been a loyal dog, but, unfortunately, her first family couldn’t reciprocate that same love back,” and so when the house was sold, neither Molly nor the family’s cat was chosen to move with them.

    While the cat was allowed to free roam outside, all Molly could do was sit and wait. Alone. Luckily, the young couple that bought the house agreed to take the animals in as part of their closing agreement, and as soon as the papers were signed, they rushed over to check in.

    In a TikTok video, April Parker, the new homeowner, walks up to Molly, who is visibly crestfallen with teary eyes. But as soon as Parker begins cooing, “Baby girl…you’re gonna get a new home,” the pitty instantly perks up, all smiles and tail wagging.

    Welcome to the family

    “We are going to make her life so good,” Parker wrote in the video’s caption. “She will never be left all alone tied to a tree.”

    @mollysnewlife

    The people that sold our house to us left behind their 10yr old dog they had since it was a puppy. I was so stressed we wouldnt get the house and something bad would happeb to her. We are going to maje her life so good. She will never be left all alone tied to a tree. 😭😢@roodytoots

    ♬ Running Up That Hill (A Deal With God) [2018 Remaster] – Kate Bush

    The video has been seen upwards of 4 million times. Countless people commented on how enraging it was to see a dog treated so carelessly.

    “I’ve had my dog since she was 7 weeks old. She just turned 10 a few days ago. I literally cannot imagine doing this,” one person wrote.”

    Another added: “The tears in her eyes…she doesn’t understand why they could just leave her, it breaks my heart. People like that shouldn’t be allowed to be pet owners.”

    A new beginning for Molly

    Subsequent videos show Parker freeing Molly from her leash and introducing the sweet pup to her husband, with whom she was instantly smitten. It’s clear that this doggo was both relieved and elated to be taken in by her new family.

    Since being rescued, Molly has accompanied her new mom and dad everywhere.

    @mollysnewlife

    Replying to @ohitscourtney she won’t stop following us around. Its so sweet!! 🥰

    ♬ Lucky Girl – Carlina

    “She’s sticking to our side,” Parker wrote. “She won’t stop following us around. It’s so sweet.”

    Parker has created an entire TikTok channel documenting her newfound pet’s journey, aptly named “Molly’s New Life,” showing Molly enjoying warm baths, plenty of treats, cuddles…all the finer things in life.

    But what Molly seems to enjoy most of all is car rides:

    @mollysnewlife

    Taking Molly to get a treat! Stay tuned!! #mollysnewlife #goodgollymissmolly 🐕🐾🐶❤️

    ♬ Happy Together – Weezer

    And in case you’re wondering, the kitty is doing well, too, though it still prefers to stay outdoors.

    Molly also has two indoor cat siblings who instantly welcomed her into the family. The video below shows one of them, Joofus, comforting a trembling Molly with kisses during a thunderstorm.

    @mollysnewlife

    We had a big storm this morning and Molly was having a hard time. Joofus got on the bed and started comforting her. It was the sweetest thing. They got snuggled up and Molly went to sleep. Animals are amazing. mollysnewlife petsarefamily

    ♬ I Won’t Let Go – Rascal Flatts

    It seems that Molly has gotten the safe, loving home she’s deserved all along.

    A reminder of why rescue stories matter

    We know that animal abandonment is fairly common. According to the ASPCA, approximately 2.8 million dogs entered shelters and rescues in 2024 alone. And still, it’s really hard to fathom how humans can treat such innocent creatures with such blatant disregard when they provide so much pure joy.

    Thankfully, there are folks out there like the Parkers who know that taking care of animals like Molly is one of life’s most precious offerings.

    This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.

  • Gen Xers share 17 nostalgic dishes they ate growing up—and still make for dinner
    Photo credit: Image via RedditA family enjoys dinner during the 1970s.

    Generation X (those born between 1965-1980) grew up eating classic Americana meals. During the 1970s, comfort meals like tuna casserole and salmon roquettes were popular meals.

    Gen X also grew up eating some pretty unhinged (but all the more yummy) sandwiches. These meals are steeped in childhood nostalgia.

    And to this day, Gen Xers are still fond of their favorite dishes they grew up eating. Together, they discussed on Reddit their most-loved home-cooked dishes that they still whip up, starting with sloppy joes.

    Here are 17 iconic Gen X comfort meals to keep in mind the next time you make dinner:

    “Breakfast. We will have a ‘breakfast for dinner’ at least a couple times a month. Yum!” – fadeanddecayed, KddKc

    “Pizza bread! My mom would cut Italian bread into pieces, put butter and garlic salt on them, then pour some spaghetti sauce on them, cover with mozzarella cheese, and broil for like ten or fifteen minutes. Super easy and quick to make and so tasty. I’m sure my mom loved that I was so into something that took roughly zero effort for her to make.” – hornybutired

    “Grilled cheese and soup.” – reincarnateme

    Meat loaf. I use 2 pounds ground beef, replace bread crumbs with minute rice, add 1 pkg beef soup flavoring, chop an entire onion for it, and mix BBQ sauce into mixture. Oh, important: do not overmix! Place all ingredients into bowl, then mix quickly 10 or 12 swirls of a large spoon. Grease loaf pan, carefully place mixture in, pat down & bake about an hour. (Extra info: for even better flavor, mix the night before, pat into loaf pan, cover with plastic, put into fridge overnight. Remove from fridge about an hour before baking. BE SURE TO REMOVE PLASTIC WRAP! [Esp. If in Pyrex glass loaf pan])” – jehardt, AbbyM1968

    “White guy tacos.” – najing_ftw

    “Skillet dinner. Kielbasa, bell pepper, onion, spuds in a cast iron pan. One dish. Easy peasy.” – UnimportantOutcome67

    “Chicken pot pie or chicken ala king.” – sattersnaps

    “Fried catfish, greens, and red beans and rice.” – User Unknown

    “Shepherds pie, technically cottage pie if it’s ground beef. Homemade enchiladas, usually made as a layered casserole instead because I don’t have time to roll them. Pork chops with mashed potatoes and veggies.” – XerTrekker

    “Fried rice with chicken or pork leftovers.” – AlternativeResort181

    “Hot hamburgers: hamburger patty open face on Texas toast thickness bread, cover with fries then cover that with brown gravy. Wife’s variation is hamburger patty over rice with brown gravy.” – EnricoMatassaEsq

    “Stuffed peppers. I make it much more easily by cooking it all in one large frying pan ‘deconstructed’. Sauté onions garlic and ground beef, add cut up peppers, tomatoes or tomato sauce, sometimes a little spinach, then add separately cooked rice, salt and pepper and serve. It comes together pretty quickly and tastes just as good as stuffing and baking peppers in the oven.” – Affectionate-Map2583

    “Macaroni and cheese with cut up hot dogs. Seriously, that’s what I ate tonight.” – Dazzling-Walrus9673

    “Homemade Stroganoff casserole. Ridiculously easy to make. Ingredients:

    1.25-1.5 lbs. Ground Beef
    1 each of large white onion, green pepper, and red pepper
    1 can mushroom pieces, drained and rinsed
    12 oz. Bag of wide egg noodles
    1 can cream of mushroom soup
    16 oz. Sour cream
    Worcestershire Sauce
    Louisiana Hot Sauce
    White or Black Pepper
    Panko bread crumbs

    To Make: Preheat oven to 360 degrees. Worcestershire, hot sauce, garlic powder, and pepper are all to taste, depending on how much flavor and punch you want it to have. Cook noodles per instructions. Drain. Peel and slice onion (not diced), core and cut peppers into strips Brown meat, onions and peppers along with liberal amount of Worcestershire; garlic, pepper, and hot sauce. Add mushrooms. Cook until meat is fully brown, onions are translucent and peppers are tender. Drain. Combine drained meat, etc. with whole can of soup, half of the sour cream. Gradually add noodles into the mix. Add sour cream as needed to maintain consistency. Add Worcestershire, hot sauce, and pepper to taste. Dump into large, deep Corning dish or whatever. Cover too with bread crumbs. Cover and bake for forty minutes.” – CynfullyDelicious

    This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

    This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

  • Dog mom reads fake letter loaded with pup’s favorite words, and his reactions are priceless
    Photo credit: Canva, hwanas99 from pixabay (dog photo) / Jonathan Welch from jdwfoto (text box) A golden retriever hears all his favorite words in a fake letter, and he reacts adorably.

    For pet parents, there are dozens of universally adorable situations. When your cat cozies up in your lap and starts “making biscuits,” you will likely react with an almost-involuntary “aww.” Plus, we all know that any time your dog stretches after a long snooze, you’re legally obligated to announce, “Big stretch!” Why do we do these things? Don’t overanalyze it—pet love goes beyond logic.

    But the ultimate cute-dog moment is probably when your pup recognizes a word and immediately, eagerly tilts their head as if to communicate, “Really?” or “What are you on about?” And one excellent viral video expertly builds on this premise, as a “dog mom” content creator reads a fake letter—one loaded with obviously familiar words—to their golden retriever.

    Dog mom reads a “letter” to an adorable golden retriever

    Subtitled “No, this is literally our fav trend,” the clip shows our protagonist pup suitably enthusiastic about a note labeled in large block letters. “Hi, Ollie. It’s your friend,” the letter begins, before Ollie runs off to the window, excitedly looking for his pal. “It’s your friend from the park. Do you remember?” the greeting continues. “We played frisbee and ball. I wanted to know—do you want to go outside later and go on a walk? By the way, where is your daddy?”

    That latter word seems particularly exciting for Ollie, who runs off once again to the window. “He usually brings us food,” we learn. “Food and water. I’ll talk to you later. Your friend, Cilio.” The video then cuts to a shot of the family cat, Cilio, before Ollie grabs the letter and cutely stomps around. Their associated YouTube account features a similar reaction video—this one featuring all of those beloved words, along with “treat” and “bone,” packaged in a fake email.

    You can’t fail to draw a reaction with a creative cute-dog video, and people naturally shared their collective “awws” in the Instagram comments. Here are some examples:

    “The little head tilt❤️❤️❤️❤️”

    “He’s literally a human being “

    ” see his expressions – he’s listening to each and every detail “

    “I can’t with his headtilts “

    “BRING HIM DAD IMMEDIATELY”

    “Not my dog tilting her head next to me over the words as I played this reel”

    “Take him out to the park now “

    “Cilio just chilling like… what?! What did I do? “

    Why do dogs tilt their heads anyway?

    Dogs are smarter than a lot of people realize, and that includes their ability to recognize a lot of what we tell them. As PetMD notes in a 2022 study of 165 adult dogs published in the journal Applied Animal Behaviour Science, researchers found that—according to pet parents—the ruffs in question knew an average of 89 words, with an overall range of 15 to 215.

    As for that classic doggy head tilt? In 2023, Scientific American explored this beloved movement, interviewing a number of experts. Andrea Sommese, an animal cognition researcher at Eötvös Loránd University in Hungary, remarked, “In humans, when you remember a story or something, you tilt your head to the side, and you have this mental image of something in your mind. Probably it’s the same for dogs.”

    This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

  • Desperate mom of 9 gives herself an emergency C-section, saving both of their lives
    Photo credit: CanvaDesperate mom gives herself an emergency C-section, saving both of their lives

    Bringing life into the world isn’t always as joyous as the media portrays. Several parents come through childbirth with physical, mental, and emotional trauma. But even among the most traumatic deliveries, the birth story of Inés Ramíez, a mother of nine in Mexico, likely catapults to the top of the list of the world’s most traumatic births.

    The International Journal of Gynecology and Obstetrics reveals in a case report originally published in December 2003, that a 40-year-old mother of nine gave herself an emergency cesarean section and lived to tell the tale. This wasn’t a self-inflicted operation to test her fortitude and pain tolerance. This was an act of desperation, utilizing different areas of personal experience to guide her actions.

    The mother lived in Oaxaca, a remote mountain town in Mexico without access to a local hospital. After delivering eight previous children, she’s an expert on how childbirth is supposed to go, but during her eighth pregnancy, something went wrong. Labor didn’t progress as it should’ve, and the baby couldn’t descend through the birth canal properly, resulting in a stillbirth.

    c-section; self-inflicted c-section; woman does own c-section; childbirth; delivering baby; emergency c-section
    Newborn’s first cry marks a fresh beginning. Photo credit: Canva

    Living in an extremely rural area with little access to everyday necessities, Ramíez was accustomed to seeing goats slaughtered for food. This knowledge came in handy when she went into labor with her ninth child at home with no other adult around to assist. When her labor stalled, showing the same signs as her previous pregnancy that ended in a stillbirth, the mom became desperate. According to the report she gave the hospital, she knew she had to get the baby out quickly, so she took three shots of hard liquor and cut into her belly. Ramíez’s husband was away deer hunting with no idea what was going on at home.

    OBGYN Shannon M. Clark shares the story on her Instagram page explaining how the mother was able to successfully perform her own C-section without dying from blood loss.

    View this post on Instagram

    A post shared by Shannon M. Clark, MD, FACOG (@babiesafter35)

    “She did a right paramedian incision vertically to gain access to her abdomen, so likely she entered somewhere near the midline between the rectus muscles, and then she cut her uterus in the same direction and delivered the male fetus. She didn’t report a lot of bleeding, but having done these a gajillion times, incisions that are up and down, either right to the side of the belly button, or above it, or below it, actually do not bleed very much because you get right in between those rectus muscles, and you avoid a lot of vessels that way,” Clark explains.

    It took her about an hour to complete the emergency surgery. Before passing out, likely from pain and shock, she directed one of her children to get her cousin, who is a local health assistant. The cousin arrived to find the mother still passed out with a gaping wound. Being that the community is so rural, her cousin didn’t have proper sutures, so she used a regular sewing needle and cotton thread to close the mother’s abdomen. The cousin then transported Ramíez in her car to the nearest clinic, 2.5 hours away, to stabilize her before continuing the drive to the hospital, which is eight hours away.

    After making it to the hospital, the doctors there were able to perform surgery to make sure nothing was amiss. They repaired her uterus and abdomen 16 hours after she performed her own C-section with a butcher’s knife. The mother healed well, leaving what appears to be a thin scar about six inches long next to her belly button.

    People who watched Clark’s video can’t fathom having the strength to do the same thing, with one woman writing, “I’m a nurse and I don’t think I could do this to myself. To someone else, maaaaaybe, but I’m not sure. The nurse who came out and used a needle and thread to sew this lady up was also incredible.”

    c-section; self-inflicted c-section; woman does own c-section; childbirth; delivering baby; emergency c-section

    Newborn baby. Photo credit: Canva

    Another says, “Well, when you’re on pregnancy number 9 you’re pretty much a professional. Whatever brand of liquor she drank should hire her to advertise. Never underestimate the power of love, adrenaline and survival instinct.”

    Even doctors are impressed: “I have to say, as an OB I am extremely impressed at how straight and nicely done her abdominal incision was.”

    This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

  • People reveal how much happier they are after ditching these 7 so-called ‘required’ things
    Photo credit: Canva (Bulat Silvia)Woman sees the solution to the maze.

    There can be a lot of pressure to do what our communities and peers expect of us. Some people find absolute bliss by letting go of peer pressure. Imagine the joy in doing less of what is “required” and more of what’s right for you.

    A question was posed in a recent r/AskReddit thread: “What’s something you didn’t realize was optional in life until you saw someone simply not doing it?” Comments ranged from common-sense opinions to valuable life lessons. It’s a curious thought about what things we might be engaging in that aren’t actually serving us. Perhaps you will remove a few of these from your behavioral patterns.

    rally, opinions, behavioral change, mindset shift, emotional well-being, life improvement, self-awarenesss
    People at a demonstration rally. Photo credit:u00a0Canva

    My opinion is necessary on this

    A few quick keystrokes, and our thoughts and opinions are easily shared on a seemingly endless stream of topics. Often with little repercussions, someone might even find themselves telling a professional how to apply their field of expertise properly.

    “That you don’t actually have to have an opinion on everything. Watching someone say “I don’t know enough about that to comment” made me realize silence is an option too.”

    Here were some clever responses to that way of thinking:

    “I find such peace in not forming opinions about a lot of things.”

    “it’s cheeky but liberating for me when people ask, ‘what do you think about […]?’ and I reply, ‘I don’t’”

    “Social media has been the biggest driver of people thinking they have to have an opinion on everything & it has destroyed the fabric of society.”

    “Some things are really, really complicated and I’m not being paid to figure them out”

    social event, self-libation, invitation, friends, excuses, appointments, parties, unhealthy routines

    People at a party. Photo credit: Canva

    It’s important to attend the events to which I’m invited

    Maybe it seems like a form of rocket science to uncover the best way to excuse ourselves from something. But, perhaps it’s actually simpler to say “no thank you” than come up with an elaborate excuse.

    “Saying ‘thank you for the invitation, but I/we won’t be able to make it!’ to a social invite without providing a detailed explanation about WHY you can’t attend.

    These responses sum up the idea nicely:

    “Usually the person you’re talking to doesn’t even care that you don’t have a reason. They were just wanting to hear yes or no”

    “BECAUSE I DON’T LIKE YOU, KAREN!”

    “when I was young my mom taught me that “No.” is a complete sentence.”

    “Yes and this also applies to work if you’re using to or vacation. You earned that time, you don’t have to explain why you want to use it. Same with canceling appointments.”

    worry, problems, lifestyle cleanup, behavioral pruning, cognitive learning, social pressure, conformity bias

    A man worried on a bench. Photo credit:u00a0Canva

    Worrying about everything

    It’s easy to get wrapped up in fear and worries. But how many things do we actually have the ability to change? On top of that, how many things are actually interfering with our lives and overall happiness?

    “The world doesn’t end if you burn a pizza, or if the water spills over when boiling pasta. That guy who cut you off isn’t the worst part of your day, the staff member at the store checking your ID isn’t a bad person. You can just “not” react to those things, and life gets a whole lot easier.”

    Redditors seemed to settle into this concept rather easily:

    “I was irritated that an accident on the freeway made me late for my first day of a new job. I took a step back and realized the people involved in that accident likely wished that my issue was their problem that day.”

    “I try and teach my little niece this – ‘whoopsie daisies!’ and ‘no big deal, we’ll clean it up! are common phrases my sis and I use.”

    “Growing up my dad always said ‘don’t sweat the small stuff.’ Used to piss me off because he usually said it when I was arguing with my sister LOL. But now I think it’s actually such an important view to have.”

    “I stress myself out about trying to do the best I can, trying to fight executive disfunction, being fast and efficient and right the first time. I really need to let that go and relax more.”

    neighbors, community influence, socail modeling, herd behavior, perceived norms, normative behavior, social expectations

    Sipping coffee and not answering the door. Photo credit:u00a0Canva

    When you’re home, make yourself available

    To some, this may be a novel concept that we are not at the beck and call of people. Perhaps it’s reasonable and fair to get back to others when it’s most convenient for us.

    “Was casually speaking to my neighbor and she mentioned the neighborhood was getting hit hard by solicitors lately. I told her a few were selling internet plans, no name wireless, and pest control services, she looked at me like I had a horn between my eyes and asked me why I was opening my door to strangers. Made me really think about how programmed we are to answer the door, to anyone and everyone who may or may not be nefarious. So, I just stopped, because it IS weird I would open my door to someone I’m not expecting.”

    People responded with their own thoughts about not answering the door:

    “The doorbell and phone ringing are requests for your attention/time. You get to decide if you grant those requests”

    “And you don’t have to hide from them either! Look out your front window, realize it’s a salesperson, wave, and then ignore them til they leave.”

    “Years ago I realized that my door, much like my phone, is for MY convenience, not the world’s.”

    “My intercom is on private. I disabled my doorbell, and less than five people know my full address. I also only speak to one neighbour. Makes for a peaceful life.”

    habits, reading, books, optional norms, myth-busting, self-permission, optional norms, hidden freedoms

    Closing the book. Photo credit:u00a0Canva

    When you start something, you must see it through to the end

    Sometimes it’s hard to put things down. Just because we “started” doesn’t necessarily mean “stopping” makes us a quitter.

    “This was a revelation to me, when a friend casually mentioned that he’d started reading a particular book, but it didn’t grab him, so he stopped. I pushed back because I’d somehow got the idea that if a book didn’t interest me, that was a fault in me for not getting it/trying hard enough/being smart enough, but he was like ‘it’s the authors job to make me want to keep reading’.”

    Commenters agreed that it’s worth stopping before finishing:

    “The same goes for TV series, movies, videogames, etc. If you’re not enjoying it or you’ve had enough you can just stop.”

    “And a book can be great but still not for me. Sometimes I just can’t get into it at that point in time or ever.”

    “Just because you invested money into it doesn’t mean you need to see it through to the end. Do something else.”

    “Yes! For a long time I felt this need to finish any book I picked up and I forced myself through some that truly just did not mesh with me.”

    care instructions, ironing, convenience, dishwasher, complicated tasks, emotional resilience, stress reduction, mental expansion

    Care instructions. Photo credit:u00a0Canva

    Things have more value if they’re complicated

    There’s something to be said for having the time and patience to work through a challenge. However, filling up our lives with complicated tasks isn’t necessarily the best plan for a more enjoyable life.

    “I call myself a Darwinist about my belongings. If you can make it through the washer/dryer, or the dishwasher, then you get to survive. Saves a whole lotta hassle, and reduces expectations.”

    These were some of the opinions people had around making life less complicated:

    “I’ve got this great ironing hack called ‘Don’t buy clothes that need ironing.’”

    “For me, it’s ‘if I can’t throw it in the dishwasher, I don’t want it in my kitchen’. Gasp in horror that I don’t follow your 5-step knife care routine, but I really dgaf.”

    “Yup, I still remember the exact Sunday night years ago when I was ironing my dress shirts for work thinking to myself ‘Why am I wasting time outside of work doing work related stuff?’ That was the last time I wore clothes that needed ironing to work.”

    “I know of people who iron their sheets. It doesn’t have to be like this. We can break the cycle.”

    family matters, wellness outcomes, mindful living, best friends, bullies, poor relationships, unhealthy people, psychological thriving

    An awkward hug. Photo credit:u00a0Canva

    Stay true to your friends and family, no matter what

    This one might be a bit more complicated than most. However, everyone has the right to determine if a friend is bringing value to the relationship.

    “My closest pals through me a little party and they asked who I wanted to come and I left someone off the list that we’d normally invite. They asked and I just said: unless you guys really want her here, or if it will cause an issue, I don’t want her to come. We all know how she’ll act and I just want to have a nice time. Everyone agreed though: we’re all tired of her behaviour. So we didn’t invite her and had a wonderful time.”

    These were some thoughts by other Redditors:

    “Yep my mil has a huge problem with me not wanting to see or speak to their bigoted racist family. I want nothing to do with them.”

    “I just hope your not dropping family because of their views / ideologies / politics, but because of how they treat you.”

    “Dropping toxic friends and, most especially family, out of your life. “What do you mean you’re not inviting A**hole Uncle Frank to Thanksgiving?” “Yup!” It is soooooooo good!”

    “But who’s going to complain about the Obamacare royalties if Uncle Frank doesn’t show up????”

    Calvin and Hobbes, boy, flying, freedom, animation, spring, animated, funny, humorous

    Calvin flies with the birds. media1.giphy.com

    Experts agree that letting go of these issues can make for a happier life

    Learning how to adapt to what actually works in our lives is a valuable tool supported by science.

    A 2025 study in BioMed Central found that hanging out with peers who engage in problematic behaviors increases depression. Learning how to protect ourselves against adopting behaviors that don’t actually serve us strongly supports emotional growth and self-esteem. A 2025 study in the Wiley Online Library found that positive self-view protected individuals from engaging in harmful behaviors. Learning how to curb unproductive habits can lead to more happiness. A 2022 study in MDPI showed that treating yourself kindly and being mindful of your emotional state and personal needs contribute to overall well-being.

    This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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