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Tod Perry

Tod Perry is an Upworthy Staff Writer from Long Beach, California. You can follow him on Twitter @TodAPerry

Health

70 percent of those who have a near-death experience have a profound spiritual change

“I know I’ll never be the same person ever..."

via Canva/Photos

A woman leaving her body.

Near-death experiences, or NDEs, can have a profound effect on someone’s life. Common experiences people have during an NDE are leaving their body and watching themselves from above, seeing a bright light, moving towards it, and encountering deceased loved ones and spiritual figures.

For many, the experience can create unexplainable joy, a sense of peace, and unconditional love. People often feel like they have an enlightened understanding of the world and that life’s great mysteries have been revealed. Some say they undergo an audit where their life flashes before their eyes. For many, the experience is positive and exhilarating. For others, they enter a dark, joyless void. But regardless of whether someone's NDE was positive or negative, it is always profound.

How does a near-death experience affect people?

A recent study from the University of Virginia’s Division of Perceptual Studies is believed to be the first to attempt to understand the psychological impact that NDEs have on people. It found that 70% of “participants reported changes in religious or spiritual beliefs and altered views on survival after death.” Previous studies had also found that after an NDE, people experienced spiritual growth and became more spiritually oriented.

The news that people regularly experience spiritual growth after an NDE should be comforting to many. The idea that death is a spiritual experience for most should make people feel more comfortable with their eventual exit from this realm.

death, going towards light, path to light, garden, Going towards the light.via Canva/Photos

“My NDE was considerable; I know I’ll never be the same person ever, so ongoing reflection and inner work are needed daily,” one study participant said. While others found it to be a “double-edged sword,” because they wanted to share their experience with others to assuage fears about dying, but thought they’d be seen as crazy. It has to be painful to have this amazing sense of existential relief and have to keep it to yourself.

Around 20% of people who experience an NDE reconsider the choices they’ve made in life and report marriage dissolutions or break-ups.

What does science say about near-death experiences?

“We know a lot about these experiences from decades of research, including their typical manifestations, incidence, medical circumstances, their impact on individuals, and even the physiological conditions of patients who have them,” researcher Marieta Pehlivanova, PhD, of UVA Health’s Department of Psychiatry and Neurobehavioral Sciences, said in a statement. “However, the research on how to support these patients and their specific needs is still limited. We hope to begin addressing this gap and to inspire other researchers, especially clinicians, to devote time and care in pursuing these questions.”

ghost, spirit, phantom, death, sheet, A ghost.via Canva/Photos

NDEs have always baffled scientists, but some neuroscientists argue that they aren’t spiritual experiences but the brain’s intense reaction to facing death. Researchers who measured brain activity in people who had just been taken off life support found an increase in gamma-frequency—activity associated with consciousness—near the back of the brain. This could account for the dramatic changes in perception during an NDE.

Researchers looking into the brains of rats suffering from asphyxiation—a lack of oxygen in the brain similar to what a human has during a heart attack—found huge spikes in brain chemicals, including dopamine, norepinephrine, adenosine, and gamma-aminobutyric acid. Serotonin levels also surged to 20 times their normal level.

Although there is no scientific consensus on why people have these dramatic experiences, the researchers at the University of Virginia know that those who go through them need quality care to process them. “We are hoping that this work sheds light on the support needs of individuals who have had a near-death experience and are trying to make sense of it and its impact,” Pehlivanova said. “In a new era of holistic patient care and extensive research on these experiences, including in medical journals, it is important to highlight the need for education of healthcare providers to address the gap in care for these patients.”

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Popular

People from other countries share 14 things that instantly tell them someone's American

Have you ever heard of the "American lean"?

via zoetnet/Flickr, Ewen Roberts/Flickr and Tom Hodgkinson/Flickr

Some American tourists enjoying the sights

Americans have a style and personality all their own, which isn’t a bad thing. It’s just noticeable when they travel aboard. Americans often stand out because of their outgoing personalities. They are friendly and enjoy having casual conversations with strangers.

This is an endearing trait to a lot of people in more reserved cultures, although it can also come off as a little brash.

An American characteristic that isn’t quite endearing to people in other countries is that they can be rather loud. In Europe, one can always notice the Americans in the restaurant because they can be heard from across the room.

One Reddit user wanted to know the specific ways that Americans stand out when traveling abroad, so they asked the AskReddit subreddit: “What’s an obvious sign that someone is an American?”

american tourists, american culture, americans abroad, americans, USA, tourists, travel, europe, culture It may not be quite this obvious, but Americans do stand out. Giphy

The post was popular, receiving nearly 6,000 responses in just 6 days. The most popular ones described how Americans' unique personalities, style of dress, dental hygiene and body language make them easy to spot.

Here are 14 “obvious” signs that someone is an American.

1. Posture

american tourists, american culture, americans abroad, americans, USA, tourists, travel, europe, culture Americans slouch and lean. Giphy

"Apparently, the CIA trains American agents to not lean on things if they go undercover in foreign countries because Americans lean on anything they can while standing around," one user wrote.

"I bet MI6 trains British agents to lean on everything if they go undercover in America because Americans lean on anything they can while standing around," joked another.

Shockingly, this is actually true. The "American lean" is well-documented and, yes, a former CIA chief has said publicly that it's something the agency addresses with its operatives to help them blend in.

2. The date

"MMDDYYYY," a user said.

The way Americans write the date seems normal and commonplace when you're in the US, but around the world, we're practically the only ones who do it that way. Similarly, only a small handful of countries outside of the US use the imperial system of measure.

Writing the date or using feet and inches are a dead giveaway!

3. Distances are different

"Anything under 4 hours is 'close by," someone suggested.

"Everything in Europe is around the corner if you're from the US. I can drive the whole day and not leave my state, but in Europe, I can pass through 4 countries in that same time frame," said another.

The massive geography of the United States has a big affect on how we see distance. It shows up when we travel to other countries that are more densely packed together.

4. They're polite to servers

"In the touristy cafe-restaurant I worked at:

If they asked me for the nicest spot we had

If they asked me my recommendation without seeing the menu first

I would walk to the table, and they would say right away ‘hey, how are you doing?’ This one threw me off a lot at first. Why is this person asking me how I'm doing?? I'm just there to take the order. I got used to it, and I think they found my awkwardness cute.

They would ask my name when I greeted them and took their order.

I'm Northern European.," explained one user.

"It’s under-appreciated just how polite, friendly, and sincere Americans are in general. It blew my mind the first time I came to the US, and I love that my children are growing up with those same values," said another.

You might expect to hear that Americans are rude and entitled when traveling, but that's not necessarily the case! In America, some friendly rapport with your waiter is expected, and Americans tend to be a more outgoing bunch that love to engage. That makes them stand out in European countries, in particular, where restaurant service is meant to be professional and efficient rather than charismatic.

5. The water bottles

american tourists, american culture, americans abroad, americans, USA, tourists, travel, europe, culture Americans love huge water bottles. Giphy

"I was told, 'Americans carry water bottles around like they're worried they'll never have access to clean water ever again," one user said.

"I don't care what anyone says. If you think carrying a water bottle when walking a lot is weird, you're probably slightly dehydrated all the time and are just desensitized to it. You seriously need to drink water frequently if you want to be ideally healthy," said another.

The water bottle fad is uniquely American, for better or worse. Whether it's a Yeti, a Stanley, an Owalla, or something else, you can bet if someone is swinging a massive water bottle wherever they walk, they're an American.

6. Smiling

"I was in Germany this past summer, and I realized smiling at everyone you make eye contact with is very American. When I went to London on the same trip, they seemed less weirded out by it but would awkwardly return the smile. I was taught to always start with a disarming smile. Never realized it was American," said one person.

7. "More ice, please."

american tourists, american culture, americans abroad, americans, USA, tourists, travel, europe, culture Americans love tons of ice in their drinks. Giphy

"I spent a year in Europe completely iceless to the point I forgot that was a thing. I stopped at a bar in Chicago fresh off the plane and not only did I get free tap water, but water with ice. I instantly felt at home," added one person.

There is a long and fascinating history involving someone called "The Ice King" behind why Americans, and so few other cultures, love to put tons of ice in our drinks. Needless to say, it makes us stand out like a sore thumb when traveling.

8. Personal space

"As an American man, I’ve been told repeatedly by European and Asian friends that we simply take up space (not by being fat) as though we’re entitled to it. Men in other countries apparently don’t claim the same personal space we do," one person offered.

You mean manspreading? Apparently, other cultures don't do that.

9. White teeth

american tourists, american culture, americans abroad, americans, USA, tourists, travel, europe, culture Americans value ultra-white teeth. Giphy

"It’s even more bizarre that they assume we have braces or bleach our teeth because they’re straight and white. I have naturally straight white teeth. I brush them twice a day so they stay white. I don’t do anything special to them, but I remember being in London and some similar-aged students literally making fun of me for my teeth… it’s true that they don’t naturally look like headstones in an ancient graveyard, but there’s no need to make fun," someone added.

Imagine getting made fun of for having white teeth! For one reason or another, American culture places high value on having extremely white teeth. We all know the old jokes about British teeth, but some findings show that while Americans' teeth may be whiter, Brits may be healthier overall. Something to think about.

10. Casual dress

"My friend went to Germany recently, and what people said about Americans is you can spot them a mile away because they’re the ones wearing pajamas in public. Apparently, in other countries, at least Germany, they dress a little more formally and in less baggy clothes than we do in America," someone added.

Activewear, sweatpants, pajamas — we love to be comfortable! But it does make us a bit obvious when we're out and about in other countries.

11. Baseball hats

american tourists, american culture, americans abroad, americans, USA, tourists, travel, europe, culture Americans wear hats... everywhere. Giphy

"Baseball cap... even on an infant riding in a pram," a user suggested.

Baseball hats are common in many countries around the world, but most people internationally only wear them outside. If someone's wearing a cap inside or at a restaurant, it's a safe bet that person is American.

12. Shoes

"Americans are shoe snobs (they don’t think they are, but they are). Setting aside wealthier business types, Americans generally wear more on-brand, on-trend, high-quality shoes than others," someone said.

13. They're loud

american tourists, american culture, americans abroad, americans, USA, tourists, travel, europe, culture Americans' default volume is loud. Giphy

"That was my first thought. Americans yell at each other in normal conversation in public. I noticed it years ago in Europe, and now I can’t stand it in the US," another user added.

Now there's an unsurprising revelation! Just like our tendency to take up space, Americans seem to have less awareness of those around them when it comes to conversation volume, as well.

14. Occupation matters

"Immediately asking someone what they do for a living when meeting them. Our jobs and work are our entire identity," one person said.

"I hate that about American culture. I'm an American and recently became a SAHM, so I don't have an answer to 'What do you do for a living?' Half the time, I add the caveat, ‘Oh, my last job was with Apple,’ so that I'm not written off as an unemployed ‘loser.’ But it really is dumb to determine a person's worth by what they do in order to afford food and shelter," added another.

There are huge differences in work culture between America and other countries. They're so big and pervasive that they show up not just while we're working, but in the way we interact with others. For example, in Europe it's far less common to be friends with your coworkers. People value the purpose they find in work and the results, but are happy to keep the majority of their life separate from their career.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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Pop Culture

Brit shares the one-word 'dead giveaway' that American actors can't do an English accent

“There is one word that is a dead giveaway that an English character in a movie or a TV show is being played by an American."

via Warner Bros Discovery

Peter Dinklage on "Game of Thrones"?

When it comes to actors doing accents across the pond, some Americans are known for their great British accents, such as Natalie Portman ("The Other Boleyn Girl"), Robert Downey, Jr. ("Sherlock Holmes"), and Meryl Streep ("The Iron Lady"). Some have taken a lot of heat for their cartoonish or just plain weird-sounding British accents, Dick Van Dyke ("Mary Poppins"), Kevin Costner ("Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves") and Keanu Reeves ("Bram Stoker's Dracula").

Some actors, such as Tom Hardy (“The Drop”) and Hugh Laurie (“House”), have American accents so good that people have no idea they are British. Benedict Townsend, a London-based comedian and host of the “Scroll Deep” podcast, says there is one word that American actors playing characters with a British accent never get right. And no, it’s not the word “Schedule,” which British people pronounce the entire first 3 letters, and Americans boil down to 2. And it’s not “aluminum,” which British and American people seem to pronounce every stinking letter differently.

@benedicttown
The one word American actors aways get wrong when doing an English accent

What word do American actors always get wrong when they do British accents?

“There is one word that is a dead giveaway that an English character in a movie or a TV show is being played by an American. One word that always trips them up. And once you notice it, you can't stop noticing it,” Townsend says. “You would see this lot in ‘Game of Thrones’ and the word that would always trip them up was ‘daughter.’”

Townsend adds that when British people say “daughter,” they pronounce it like the word “door” or “door-tah.” Meanwhile, Americans, even when they are putting on a British accent, say it like “dah-ter.”

“So top tip if you are an actor trying to do an English accent, daughter like a door. Like you're opening a door,” Townsend says.

What word do British actors always get wrong when doing American accents?

Some American commenters returned the favor by sharing the word that British actors never get right when using American accents: “Anything.”

"I can always tell a Brit playing an American by the word anything. An American would say en-ee-thing. Brits say it ena-thing,” Dreaming_of_Gaea wrote. "The dead giveaway for English people playing Americans: ‘Anything.’ Brits always say ‘EH-nuh-thin,’” marliemagill added. "I can always tell an actor is English playing an American when they say ‘anything.’ English people always say it like ‘enny-thin,’” mkmason wrote.

What is the cot-caught merger?

One commenter noted that the problem goes back to the cot-caught merger, when Americans in the western US and Canadians began to merge different sounds into one. People on the East Coast and in Britain pronounce them as different sounds.

“Depending on where you live, you might be thinking one of two things right now: Of course, ‘cot’ and ‘caught’ sound exactly the same! or "There’s no way that ‘cot’ and ‘caught’ sound the same!” Laura McGrath writes at DoYouReadMe. “As a result, although the different spellings remain, the vowel sounds in the words cot/caught, nod/gnawed, stock/stalk are identical for some English speakers and not for others.” For example, a person from New Jersey would pronounce cot and catch it as "caht" and "cawt," while someone from Los Angeles may pronounce them as "caht" and "caht."

To get a better idea of the big difference in how "caught" and "cot" are pronounced in the U.S., you can take a look at the educational video below, produced for a college course on linguistics.

- YouTube youtu.be

American actors owe Townsend a debt of gratitude for pointing out the one thing that even the best can’t seem to get right. For some actors, it could mean the difference between a great performance and one that has people scratching their heads. He should also give the commenters a tip of the cap for sharing the big word that British people have trouble with when doing an American accent. Now, if we could just get through to Ewan McGregor and tell him that even though he is fantastic in so many films, his American accent still needs a lot of work.

This article originally appeared last year.

actors

Community

The 13 signs that someone is 'dangerously good' at reading people

"You feel comfortable talking to them, and you find yourself sharing things with them that you don’t typically share."

via Canva/Photos

A woman enjoying a conversation while drinking wine.

Some people are just naturally good at reading others. They pick up on subtle cues, body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions that go over other people’s heads. They are adept at seeing past other people's words and cuing into the energy or emotions behind them.

People who are great at reading others have a significant advantage in being creative, building relationships, and building teams. But where does it come from? Why does it seem like some people have an extra social muscle that others just don’t?

Some posit that people who are adept at reading others often come from backgrounds where they grew up with chaotic parents or family members. To preserve themselves, they become keen observers of subtle clues to protect themselves against abusive outbursts.

family, unpredictable, parents, kids, observant, anxiety Unhappy child and parent.via Canva/Photos

This makes them excellent students of tone of voice, body language, and emotional states so that they can defend themselves.

To those who aren’t brilliant at reading others, these people’s skills seem mysterious at best. So, a Reddit user posed a question to the AskReddit forum to see what other people have noticed about people who are great at reading others. “What's a sign that someone is dangerously good at reading people?” they asked. They received over 1,300 replies, and we compiled the best.

Here are 13 signs that someone is “dangerously good” at reading people.

1. You immediately overshare

"You feel comfortable talking to them and you find yourself sharing things with them you don’t typically share."

2. They're hard to read

"They themselves are typically hard to read."

"Or better yet people think they are reading you and know you but all they know is what you want them to think they know."

stoic, unreadable, person, gif, composure fan goat GIF by UCF Knights Giphy

3. They're neutral observers

"Observe the person. It helps if you’re naturally empathetic. You can tell when they’re being sincere or when there’s motivation. You can hear it in their voice when they’re nervous, jealous, or uncomfortable. You can see it in their face. You can feel when their energy pauses, dips, or spikes. The key is to be neutral yourself. If you’re not invested in the outcome of the interaction at all, you can read others better."

"My mom is the one who tipped me off to this. She said it was the key to learning about our lives when we were preteens and teens. She said she was careful not to ever react in big ways to anything we said, especially if it was negative, because if she did we would be more likely to stop providing info. If she acted neutral, we’d keep talking."

4. They had unpredictable parents

"Some people who grew up with unpredictable parents become hyper-observant of micro-expressions. When coupled with empathy and a good memory, they can ask good questions at the right time, or pick up on unspoken emotions (or intentions/danger). This can be a blessing and a curse."

"This is exactly how I got good at reading people. If I found myself unable to predict what my father was going to do next, there's a good chance bad things happen to me. It's born out of necessity."

5. They know you before you open your mouth

"They clock your mood or thoughts before you’ve even said anything. They would ask really specific questions. Not nosy, just oddly on point. Also, watch how fast they adjust. You’re all fired up, and they’re calm and grounding."

6. They're accurate

"When they say something about you that you’ve never told anyone, but it’s scarily accurate... like ?? How do you know that, that’s when you know they’re built different."

knowing, smart, observant, accurate, gif Think Tap Tap GIF by DraftKings Giphy

7. They may sabotage themselves

"People who are highly intuitive, very observant and understands people dynamics usually at the expense of knowing themselves well at times."

"OH MY GOD. This. This this this. This is exactly my wife who is by far the best people person I've ever seen...and she's terrible at understanding herself or solving her own problems."

8. They understand receptivity

"Children and animals like and trust them. They are constantly aware of the receptivity levels of others."

animals, trustworthy, likeable, gif, snow white Snow White Hello GIF by Disney Princess Giphy

9. They ask the right questions

"When they ask lots of questions to people, especially when they’re based off observations.

You usually don’t ___ and i see now you’re ___, is everything alright?

Since you’ve been dating your partner, I’ve noticed _____. What’s up?

I’ve noticed when you feel like ____ you usually do _____, and you’ve been doing ____ lots recently, how come?

NEVER in a way which sounds or is judgemental, is always evidence based, and as a result people are often willing to open up and elaborate more without fear of being judged. My friends do this and I try so hard to learn from them."

10. They don't show it

"One of the biggest signs that someone is exceptionally skilled at reading people is that they don’t show it. People who are truly skilled observers mask their awareness and let others underestimate them while they quietly collect insight. They downplay their intuition and pretend to guess poorly. Also, they ask or say things that are psychologically strategic."

11. You don't know them, but they know you

"You feel super close to them, very comfortable sharing anything with them and consider them a close friend. In retrospect, you realize you know next to nothing about them beyond the surface."

12. They can make friends with anyone

"I had a friend who was insanely good at reading people. He once told me 'if I want you to be my friend, you will.' I believed it too. He could be friends with anyone."

"That's kinda creepy ngl, smacks of the Machiavellian type more than the empathetic type."

friends, friendly, personable, gif, likeable Season 3 Friends GIF by Nanalan' Giphy

13. You're afraid to lie around them

"You feel like you’re talking to a raven and you’re scared to lie."

This article originally appeared in May.

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Culture

17 life hacks that work so well it's stunning that more people don't know them

People have discovered some pretty cool tricks to make everyday life easier.

Photo credit: Canva

17 life hacks that everyone needs to know.

Love it or hate it, or love it and hate it, the Internet is a place of creation and destruction. It’s where people come together to share ideas and collaborate to make a better world. It’s also the destination of choice for those who like to sow chaos and contribute to the gradual unravelling of civilized society. In this article, we aim to focus on the positive side of the Internet by sharing one of the newest rounds of life hacks, which are seriously simple ways to make your life easier.

Tech writer Danny O’Brien coined the term "life hack" in 2004 to describe software-related tricks that developers used to make their lives easier. “Modern life is just this incredibly complex problem amenable to no good obvious solution,” O’Brien told Lifehacker in 2005. “But we can peck around the edges of it; we can make little shortcuts. And once you point out that everyone does that, once you coin the term, it’s really easy to pile a whole of lot of shared behaviors into one neat pile.”

life hacks, life advice, productivity hacks, cooking hacks, productivity tips, life tips Coding Shooting Star GIF by Giflytics Giphy

Reddit is always a great place for people to share their latest and greatest life hacks. Recently, a user asked people to share the ones that are “so good, you can't believe other people don’t know them." The responses didn’t disappoint. They covered everything from time-saving keyboard shortcuts to how to pick the best orange at the grocery store. We combed the list to choose the best 17, and here they are:

17 lifehacks that are so great people can't believe everyone doesn't know them

1. Pick heavy fruit

"When purchasing citrus fruit, select the heavy ones. They are more likely to be fresh and juicy than the lighter ones (assuming the same variety and similar size)."

"I learned from Alton Brown to pick the fruit that feels heavier than it looks. Means it's more dense. Hasn't failed me yet!"

life hacks, life advice, productivity hacks, cooking hacks, productivity tips, life tips Lets Go Hot Ones GIF by First We Feast Giphy

2. Dental trick

"Dental tablets - like the ones that dissolve to clean dentures - clean out water bottles incredibly well. Can be super lightweight to carry while camping/hiking/traveling too. Put all my friends onto this hack!"

"Have been using them for decades for cleaning anything that's not easily cleanable. And since it's made to clean ... teeth you can use it without worry for anything that touches food."

Denture tablets are great at removing stubborn stains, descaling coffee makers, or getting the impossible red-sauce hue out of tupperware.

3. Clipboard history

"For people who work on Windows computers, hit the Windows key and V at the same time. Instead of pasting, it opens up your entire clipboard. Once you enable it, it will save a history of what you copy, and you can pick and choose."

"I have worked with computers for decades and just tried this. I cannot believe I didn't already know how to do this. Thank you random internet person!"

life hacks, life advice, productivity hacks, cooking hacks, productivity tips, life tips Oh My God Omg GIF Giphy

4. Magic delete

"Instead of hitting backspace 10x when you misspell a word and want to retype it you hold control and when you backspace it deletes the whole word."

5. Proven stress reducer

"Minding your own business really does reduce stress."

"Honestly, just leaving social media behind in the dust can be amazing for your soul."

6. Latex for pet hair

"A wet latex glove in circling motions extracts all the pet hair embedded in your couch's upholstery into neat little balls that you can easily collect and discard."

"Tbh you don't even need to get it wet. The friction and static clump everything together. I work as a dog groomer and at the end of every work day, I throw on a glove and just start going to town on any fuzzy surfaces."

life hacks, life advice, productivity hacks, cooking hacks, productivity tips, life tips Tattoo Artist Oh Snap GIF by Hart & Huntington Tattoo Giphy

7. Two checking accounts

"Having two checking accounts. One for bills, one for spending. Total up all of your monthly bills and divide by how many paychecks you get in a month. That amount (plus a little more for fluff) should go into the bills account. The rest is for saving or spending and goes to the other account. Never keep the debit card for the bills account with you. That money is NOT for fun times!"

"I have not had a single money issue since I started doing this. Should be way higher."

life hacks, life advice, productivity hacks, cooking hacks, productivity tips, life tips Make It Rain Loop GIF by Chris Timmons Giphy

8. The hiccup cure

"If you have hiccup or sidestitch (running), you can rid of it by exhaling all the way till you have no more breath and then hold it for a few seconds."

"For hiccups, I usually take really deep breaths and hold them. I guess either way is pretty much just stimulating the diaphragm, which helps stop the hiccups."

There are many scientifically backed methods for getting rid of hiccups. No one in particular is a silver bullet, but lots of people find one that works for them and stick with it.

9. The trick to being a great listener

"Do you want to vent or do you want advice?"

"We're on the same team. It's you and me vs the problem, not me vs you."

10. Unzip zip ties

"You can loosen zip ties by pinching the side of the block with pliers."

"Alternatively, you can also push a pin or small flathead screwdriver under the tab to lift it and then let the zip tie out that way without damaging the block."

11. Lettuce that lasts

"Wrapping lettuce in aluminum foil makes it last for a month."

The key is getting the moisture levels just right. A sealed plastic bag will make the lettuce soggy, while storing it in open air will cause it to dry out. Loosely wrapped foil keeps just enough moisture on the leaves.

12. Brag your way to the top

"Work pro tip, particularly if you are in an office/corporate environment: Just doing your work silently isn’t enough. There is a reason those most vocal are usually who get promoted. It might be unnatural, but you need people to know the work you’re delivering. You have to be comfortable humble-bragging to keep climbing."

"Can confirm. Have talked myself through many promotions all the way from the floor to a director position. I guess I have to do some actual work soon though… meh, let me go see who’s by the coffee machine now. It’s been five minutes after all."

life hacks, life advice, productivity hacks, cooking hacks, productivity tips, life tips Brag Jason Segel GIF by Apple TV Giphy

13. Meditation is peace

"Prayer and meditation do not change other people or your surroundings; what they change is *you*: how you interpret situations, other people's actions, how you react, etc. and as you calm and filter life through this lens, the people around you become calmer, more at ease, more open to connection with you, and life expands."

"This is also what mindfulness does, too! And ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy). They help you learn to give space to your thoughts, feelings, and actions before you make a decision to keep them or let them go."

14. Get moving

"If you're depressed, don't feel good, maybe had a bender or anything else, get out from underneath the blanket and take a walk around the block. You will feel 10x better after about 10 minutes of moving. If you're actually bed-ridden or sick sick. Don't. But if you're hungover or beating yourself up or you don't feel good, go for a stroll. You'll feel better when you get back."

"When I was super depressed, I'd call it my depression shuffle. Once every 24 hours, didn't matter what time, I had to go outside for 10 minutes. Didn't get properly dressed or anything, coat and beanie, and then at minimum a slow shuffle to loop twice around my building. Usually I went right back to bed after. It didn't make everything instantly better, but it did put me one inch closer toward recovery. An inch is an inch, I'll take it."

life hacks, life advice, productivity hacks, cooking hacks, productivity tips, life tips woman walking on pathway during daytime Photo by Emma Simpson on Unsplash

15. Enliven your leftovers

"Using a slightly damp paper towel to cover food when you microwave it. Prevents it from getting dry and retains more flavor."

"Also, if you're reheating leftovers and don't want them to be soggy from the microwave, put them in the Air Fryer for 5 to 7 minutes. Works well for French fries, chicken wings, spring rolls, etc."

16. Revolving credit

"I have one credit card that is used exclusively for recurring bills, and it never leaves the house. It’s also set to autopay, so I never have to think about it."

17. Don't worry about what you can't control

"Stop allowing things you can't control to live rent-free in your head."

"A very helpful trick I learned for when anxiety is making me ruminate at night is to pick a random shortish word, preferably with nonrepeating letters (ex, "blue"). Take the first letter of that word (B) and just start listing any and all words you can think of that start with that first letter. When stuck, move on to the next letter (L) and start listing those words. If you make it to the end of your word, start over with a different word and eventually your brain gets bored enough to let you fall sleep lol. I can usually go from high anxiety to dead asleep within a few minutes and most often before I finish my first word, so it might be worth a try! Bonus: there's nothing to learn or practice for it to work since it's just listing words :) hell, it even works if you misspell your base word lol."

This article originally appeared in May. It has been updated.

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Retired teacher saw a lot of parenting mistakes throughout her career. This was the biggest.

Take it from someone who's seen thousands of kids grow up in the blink of an eye.

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A child who disagrees with her mother.

Let's do a little bit of quick math. If an elementary school teacher starts their job immediately after finishing college and then works until they are 65, they’ll likely teach over 1,200 students and interact with around 2,000 parents. That type of experience, paired with a great understanding of children, provides teachers with incredible insight into what makes a great parent.

That experience can also help people understand where many parents need help these days. Elena Nicolaou, senior editor for “The Today Show,” asked her mother, a retired elementary school teacher, to share the most significant parenting mistake she had seen throughout her career, and it’s disappointing to hear. “They didn’t enjoy them,” she said. “Kids are fun. You’ve got to enjoy them. They wanted them to be something that — most of us aren’t exactly what other people want us to be — so enjoy the kid you have.”

“I enjoyed you,” the retired teacher said while looking at her daughter.

@elenanico22
Lisa says it like it is #momlife #momsoftiktok #momwisdom #momtok #momhumor #parenting #parentingwisdom

What’s one of the biggest mistakes parents make today?

The teacher’s advice reminds parents everywhere to see their children for who they are, not who they want them to be. Because there’s nothing worse in this world than being a square peg that our parents are trying to squeeze into a round hole. You may want your child to excel in sports, but maybe they are happiest and most successful in theater. You may push your child to be in beauty pageants when they want to play music. You may want your child to be stoic when they are really sensitive and artistic.

The teacher’s advice suggests that parents should help their children become their best rather than shaping them into something that conflicts with their inner nature.

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What is the problem with strict parenting?

The retired teacher shared what happens when parents push their children too far by using the example of a famous person at the school where she taught. “There was one very famous parent who, unfortunately, is sort of still involved now in politics,” the teacher said. “But he was a doctor then, and he was very strict about what his kids could eat. Like, super strict. So, of course, what did the kids want? Everything they couldn't have.”

There’s a reason why kids who have overly strict parents often rebel against how they were raised, whether it’s in a repressive household where they aren’t allowed to watch cartoons or a health-obsessed home where they couldn’t enjoy the occasional cookie. It’s a psychological phenomenon called “reactence.” When people feel their freedom is being threatened, they will become motivated to do the opposite of what they feel pressured to do. This can also be a problem when children are pushed to be something they are not.

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“I call it the picture frame parent. As long as the kid looks like the perfect kid in a frame on their desk and the kid doesn’t mess up big enough to break that image, it’s all good,” one commenter wrote. “Toddler teacher. Same. So heartbreaking. I saw it a lot when I worked with highly educated parents with high incomes,” another added.

Some chimed in with sympathy for parents who are working hard and can't give their children the attention they deserve. "Parents are stressed, and they don’t realize how quickly childhood goes by," a commenter wrote. "We do enjoy our kids, but most of us have no village. It’s exhausting," another wrote.

A great carpenter cuts with the grain just as a seasoned sailor adjusts to the wind and a master chef seasons according to taste, not just the recipe. According to this retired teacher, a good parent sees their child for who they are and tries to develop them into the best version of themselves, rather than pushing them to be someone they are not.

This article originally appeared earlier this year. It has been updated.

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Burnout expert’s 11 rapid-fire questions reveal why Millennials feel so 'lazy'

"Well, this is both specific and accurate."

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A woman dealing with burnout.

A recent poll found that Millennials are the generation most likely to suffer from workplace burnout. A poll by Seramount, a global talent services firm, found that 67% of American workers report at least one symptom of burnout, and it's hitting younger workers hardest. Over 70% of Millennials (77%) and Gen Zers (72%) experience at least one burnout symptom, compared to Gen X (62%) and Boomers (32%).

Why is it that burnout hits Millennials so much harder than even its younger cohorts? “Millennials already weathered several seasons of significant turmoil during their relatively short careers, from the Great Recession to the COVID-19 pandemic,” said Diana Forster, Senior Director of Qualitative Research at Seramount. “Now, many are in mid-level management roles with increased responsibilities, intensifying stress and burnout.”

Why do Millennials suffer from burnout?

Dr. Sarah Nicholls, a former emergency room doctor and current life coach specializing in burnout, laid out the reasons why Millennials feel so "lazy" by asking herself 11 rapid-fire questions.

@drsarahnicholls
it's a mystery 🤷‍♀️ Find the full 'am I lazy or am I burnt out' video on my youtube channel

The rapid-fire questions asked by Dr. Nicholls included some textbook symptoms of burnout:

"Do you work an incredibly demanding job?"

"Have you been working through your lunch break and finishing late every day?"

"Do you say yes anytime someone asks you for a favor?"

"Have you been thinking about work all the time and feel like you never really get a chance to switch off?"

"Do you have loads of unread messages from friends and family, and now you feel like a bad friend on top of everything else because you don’t have the energy to read and reply?"

The vast majority of commenters on the video thought that Dr. Nicholls was spot on in her description of why Millennials feel so burnt out and lazy these days. “Well, this is both specific and accurate,” lifewithtedanddougal wrote. “Where’d you get that footage of me on the sofa?” Heather Annie added.

burnout, millennial, work, tired, lazy, office A woman dealing with burnout.via Canva/Photos

How to prevent burnout

Many Millennials are burned out because they don’t feel they can keep up with their professional and social obligations. Dr. Molly Moore says the first step someone dealing with burnout can take is to start setting boundaries. Dr. Moore, a licensed psychologist with over 10 years of experience in mental health and wellness currently has a virtual private practice specializing in working with high-achieving women who experience anxiety, imposter syndrome, and burnout.

“Setting boundaries can be hard for many of my high-achieving clients who thrive off feeling productive and getting recognition. But burnout can stem from a lack of boundaries in our personal and professional lives. Boundaries can help high-achieving folks be more present and thrive in both their personal and professional lives,” Dr. Moore told Upworthy. “Some examples of boundaries may look like: not answering emails or taking work calls after hours, communicating clearly about your capacity and response time, delegating tasks that you do not have time or space for, utilizing their PTO (most of my clients have LOTS of PTO time that they have trouble utilizing), and taking multiple short breaks during the day.”

burnout, millennial, work, tired, lazy, office A woman dealing with burnout.via Canva/Photos

How to recover from burnout

For those dealing with burnout and looking to regain their energy, Dr. Sarah Boss from The Balance Rehab Clinic says you have to be intentional about rebuilding your resilience.

“You can’t eliminate stress, but you can train your system to recover from it. That means prioritizing proper sleep, balanced nutrition, daily movement, and moments of genuine downtime. I often talk about mindful rest—consciously choosing to pause and recharge instead of collapsing from exhaustion. It’s about actively scheduling recovery, whether that’s a walk, sitting in the sun, or simply being present with yourself. If you learn to regulate your stress response daily, burnout becomes far less likely,” Boss told Upworthy. “Most people wait until they have 'time' to recover, and that’s the myth that causes burnout in the first place. We can’t wait for space to appear to regulate ourselves; we have to build it into our daily schedule.”

It can feel impossible to balance work and career when there are so many demands on your energy and attention. But our experts believe that with a little work, anything is possible. Setting boundaries and allowing for recovery time can help you navigate this stressful time by cultivating greater focus and energy.

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