People are sharing easy-to-miss signs that someone may be highly intelligent.
There are a few stereotypical traits we might associate with high intelligence. Someone who's arrogant, longwinded, or perhaps a bit socially awkward. We might expect them to constantly show off their smarts with rants and speeches and lectures and make a big show of how much more intelligent they are than others.
The truth is far more complicated. The smartest people, those who are truly brilliant, are usually delightful to be around. In fact, they may come across totally "normal." But there are still strong signs of their intelligence lurking beneath the surface; you just have to know what to look for.
A Redditor recently asked people on the AskReddit forum to share the “non-obvious signs” that people are intelligent. Many of their responses centered on highly intelligent people being open-minded, curious, and not wasting their time arguing with others.
Brilliant people are confident in what they know, consider other people’s opinions, and readily admit when they don’t know the answer.
Albert EinsteinArthur Sasse/Wikimedia Commons
What are 15 'non-obvious' signs that someone is really smart?
1. They know what they don't know
"They acknowledge areas where they lack knowledge."
"'Never pretend to know something when you don't' is something I always teach. It covers lying and ignorance."
Pretending to know everything is a sign of arrogance and ego. Truly intelligent people are always willing to learn.
2. They consider other people's ideas
"They’ll listen to the other's facts and points and take them into account when giving an objection."
"One of the best developers at my last job and manager of a project I was at is an extremely intelligent person. ... One thing I noticed is how he would take everyone's opinion into account. He would take my opinions into consideration even if I'm not a smarter person or know less about development."
3. They make you feel smart
"Talking to a dumb person will make you feel smart. Talking to a smart person will make you feel dumb. Talking to a very smart person will make you feel smart."
4. They see patterns
"Part of the reason smart people throughout history are well-known is because they discovered something new and figured out how to maximize its potential. Darwin was a guy who discovered a bunch of islands with slightly different animals. He then collected and analyzed that data to come up with the theory of evolution, which was largely correct. Einstein’s theory of relativity was based off of his observation that physics acted on everything equally. He figured out that “exceptions” were because of the way high-speed objects interact with the universe’s speed limit (the speed of light). He recognized these exceptions by gathering them and recognizing the pattern between them all, then created his theory of relativity based on that."
Neil deGrasse TysonUnited States Department of Education/Wikimedia Commons
5. They consider multiple intelligences
"They realize not everyone is smart the same way. Your 'stupid hick neighbor' might have dropped out of school in 8th grade, but he can drive your car once and tell you exactly what's wrong, then fix it. That a**hole in school that had no empathy for anyone and showed no emotion made that sci-fi sh*t you thought would never be real. Yeah, she's dingy and her worldview is tiny, but she's the best teacher you've ever met and inspires tons of kids to go on and do great things with themselves. There's no one-size-fits-all answer here, really."
People who are super bright are probably familiar with Howard Gardner's theory of multiple intelligences. The theory suggests that people have more than just one type of just one type of intelligence, like being good at mathematics. Gardener says there are several, including musical, spatial, linguistic, interpersonal, intrapersonal, and kinesthetic intelligence. This theory allows people to appreciate different forms of intelligence that may not be of the academic variety.
6. They choose their battles
"When another person is not able to process something and, therefore, sticks with his opinion, after a few tries, the smart person just gives up. There is no use in trying to make someone understand something while they already have an uneducated opinion."
7. They speak to their audience
"They know how to explain concepts on just about any level, tailoring that level to their intended audience, and without coming across as condescending in any way."
"I heard a saying that went 'you have to be an expert to explain it simply.'"
Stephen HawkingBy NASA/Paul E. Alers/Wikimedia Commons
8. They're confident in their intelligence
"Not constantly bragging about their intelligence. If they truly are smart, people can figure that out pretty quickly without them doing anything to show it."
"You generally only brag about things you're insecure about because you seek validation. If you are very comfortable with your intelligence, then you may not care if someone misinterprets you and makes you look dumb or something. You have nothing to prove. That's not just for intelligence but for anything."
9. They're funny
"I think the smart people are even more funny than stupid people because smart people understand the complexity behind humor and can make their jokes reflect that."
Scientific studies show that funny people, especially those with a dark sense of humor, are more intelligent than their not-so-funny peers. Researchers argue that it takes cognitive and emotional ability to make people laugh, and analysis shows that funny people have higher verbal and non-verbal intelligence.
10. They mind their own business
"This is a big one. They keep to themselves and deal with their own drama."
Truly smart people generally aren't entertained with drama and gossip.
11. They aren't necessarily great students
"Believe it or not 'average' or 'above average' students are often smarter than those with straight A’s on the report cards. They do enough to pass well and get what they want but don’t let the academic system control them. Life isn’t all about booksmarts. This shows they are independent thinkers and don’t get wrapped up in designed systems. Not all, but many. Many kids who are forced to always be exceptional in school can end up the worst off and can develop deeper issues."
12. They are good listeners
"They actually listen to who they are talking to as opposed to waiting for their turn to talk."
13. Curiosity
"It really does seem to be one of the single greatest differentiators between average and smart."
A meta-analysis of over 50,000 students from around 200 separate studies found that students who are curious do better in their school work over those who are not. Why is curiosity so important when it comes to IQ? “Curiosity is basically a hunger for exploration. If you’re intellectually curious, you’ll go home, you’ll read the books," Dr Sophie von Stumm, the study’s first author, said. "If you’re perceptually curious, you might go traveling to foreign countries and try different foods.”
Carl SaganKenneth C. Zirkel/Wikimedia Commons
14. Comfortable in silence
"Being comfortable enough to allow a moment of complete silence while you think when the natural instinct of most is to immediately start replying tells me that you are, at the very least, mindful of what you want to say."
15. Unattached to their opinions
"Most of the smart people I know are not pushy with their opinions; by contrast, most of the opinionated people I know are flaming morons. I don't know if there's a correlation there, but my anecdotal experience has always been that the more eager someone is to state their opinion, the less that opinion is probably worth."
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This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.
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A woman with her finger over her mouth.
It can be hard to stay quiet when you feel like you just have to speak your mind. But sometimes it's not a great idea to share your opinions on current events with your dad or tell your boss where they're wrong in a meeting. And having a bit of self-control during a fight with your spouse is a good way to avoid apologizing the next morning.
Further, when we fight the urge to talk when it's not necessary, we become better listeners and give others a moment in the spotlight to share their views. Building that small mental muscle to respond to events rather than react can make all the difference in social situations.
A woman is getting angry at her coworker.via Canva/Photos
What is the WAIT method?
One way people have honed the skill of holding back when they feel the burning urge to speak up is the WAIT method, an acronym for the question you should ask yourself in that moment: "Why Am I Talking?" Pausing to consider the question before you open your mouth can shift your focus from "being heard" to "adding value" to any conversation.
The Center for The Empowerment Dynamic has some questions we should consider after taking a WAIT moment:
- What is my intention behind what I am about to say?
- What question can I ask to better understand what the other person is saying?
- Is my need to talk an attempt to divert the attention to me?
- How might I become comfortable with silence rather than succumb to my urge to talk?
A man with tape over his mouth.via Canva/Photos
The WAIT method is a good way to avoid talking too much. In work meetings, people who overtalk risk losing everyone's attention and diluting their point to the extent that others aren't quite sure what they were trying to say. Even worse, they can come across as attention hogs or know-it-alls. Often, the people who get to the heart of the matter succinctly are the ones who are noticed and respected.
Just because you're commanding the attention of the room doesn't mean you're doing yourself any favors or helping other people in the conversation.
The WAIT method is also a great way to give yourself a breather and let things sit for a moment during a heated, emotional discussion. It gives you a chance to cool down and rethink your goals for the conversation. It can also help you avoid saying something you regret.
A husband is angry with his wife. via Canva/Photos
How much should I talk in a meeting?
So if it's a work situation, like a team meeting, you don't want to be completely silent. How often should you speak up?
Cary Pfeffer, a speaking coach and media trainer, shared an example of the appropriate amount of time to talk in a meeting with six people:
"I would suggest a good measure would be three contributions over an hour-long meeting from each non-leader participant. If anyone is talking five/six/seven times you are over-participating! Allow someone else to weigh in, even if that means an occasional awkward silence. Anything less seems like your voice is just not being represented, and anything over three contributions is too much."
Ultimately, the WAIT method is about taking a second to make sure you're not just talking to hear yourself speak. It helps ensure that you have a clear goal for participating in the conversation and that you're adding value for others. Knowing when and why to say something is the best way to make a positive contribution and avoid shooting yourself in the foot.
People doing dead hangs in the park.
Here's a morbid question: Would you really want to know how long you have to live? On one hand, it’d probably inspire you to go out and complete your bucket list. On the other hand, it may be depressing to know just how many days you have left. Well, science has yet to find a way to determine the average person's life expectancy, but some indicators can show whether someone is at risk of having their life cut short by deteriorating health.
You could, if you were so inspired, shell out a bunch of money for fancy genetic and biological testing. Chasing immortality is all the rage with billionaires, so if you've got the money, you can find out an awful lot about how long you're likely to live.
Or you could just hit the gym or local playground and find out for free.
A 2019 study published in Clinical Interventions in Aging in 2019 found that handgrip strength can be a reliable proxy for longevity.
The importance of handgrip strength
One of the best ways to judge handgrip strength is to time how long you can hang from a bar. To test your grip strength, find yourself a pull-up bar, whether at a gym or local park, take a deep breath, and start hanging. Don't worry, you don't need to be able to do a pull up!
Ironically, the move is called a "dead hang." So-called, because you literally just hang there for as long as possible.
The literature revealed that 30 seconds is a good target for women and 60 seconds is an excellent goal for men.
Therefore, if you go longer than the goal, you’re looking at a long life. But if you can’t quite get there, your life may be shorter than you’d like.
A man on a pull-up bar.via Canva/Photos
Dr. Peter Attia, founder of Early Medical and author of Outlive: The Science and Art of Longevity (2023), believes that grip strength is a great way to determine one’s overall health.
“It's just a great proxy for overall body strength and muscle mass, but I think it's also a very functional form of strength,” he said on The Drive podcast. “Basically, everything in your upper body is mediated through your hands. And if your grip is weak, everything downstream of that is weak. When you watch someone who's got a weak grip deadlifting, it's very difficult for them to deadlift correctly because they don't create a proper wedge."
There are many ways to measure grip strength, but the dead hang is likely the simplest. When you think about it, it requires an incredible combination of shoulder mobility, spinal stability, core strength, and overall fitness. Not only are these all positive biological health markers, but they're also all key to preventing falls as we get older.
Regularly practicing the dead hang, on the other hand, has incredible benefits, including stretching your muscles and deloading your joints and spine, giving them a much-needed rest. What could be more fun than increasing your lifespan by just hanging out? You don't even need a gym membership; most local parks have a small workout area with a pull-up bar. They'are also easy to install at home.
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Doctors Eve M. Glazier and Elizabeth Ko at UCLA Health say poor grip strength is connected to numerous diseases. “Research continues to link a decline in grip strength to a range of adverse health issues, including heart disease, arthritis, osteoporosis, Type 2 diabetes and certain cancers. It has also been found to be a predictor of the likelihood of post-surgical complications, post-surgical recovery time, and mortality,” they wrote on the UCLA Health blog.
Losing weight can increase your hang time
Weight can also significantly affect how long a person can hang from a bar. So, do lighter people have an unfair advantage over those on the heavier side? Well, weight is also an important indicator of longevity. A study published in Aging Cell found a direct correlation between increased body mass and decreased longevity. So, for some, losing a bit of weight can have a two-fold advantage.
Other studies have elaborated on the findings: More important than your absolute grip strength and dead-hang ability may be how they change over time. Losing grip strength is a negative sign for your overall health, but maintaining or even building it is associated with better outcomes.
A woman working out at the gym.via Canva/Photos
How to perform a dead hang (according to Healthline):
- Use a secure overhead bar. Use a step or bench to reach the bar with your arms easily. You don’t want to jump straight into a dead hang.
- Grip the bar with an overhand grip (palms facing away from you). Aim to keep your arms shoulder-width apart.
- Move your feet off the step or bench so you’re hanging on to the bar.
- Keep your arms straight and stay relaxed.
- If you’re new to the exercise, hang for 10 seconds. Then, work your way up to 45 seconds to 1 minute at a time.
- Slowly step back onto the step or bench before releasing your arms. Repeat up to 3 times if you wish.
This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.
Harvard researcher Arthur C. Brooks studies what leads to human happiness.
We live in a society that prizes ambition, celebrating goal-setting, and hustle culture as praiseworthy vehicles on the road to success. We also live in a society that associates successfully getting whatever our hearts desire with happiness. The formula we internalize from an early age is that desire + ambition + goal-setting + doing what it takes = a successful, happy life.
But as Harvard University happiness researcher Arthur C. Brooks has found, in his studies as well as his own experience, that happiness doesn't follow that formula. "It took me too long to figure this one out," Brooks told podcast host Tim Ferris, explaining why he uses a "reverse bucket list" to live a happier life.
Many people make bucket lists of things they want in life. Giphy
Brooks shared that on his birthday, he would always make a list of his desires, ambitions, and things he wanted to accomplish—a bucket list. But when he was 50, he found his bucket list from when he was 40 and had an epiphany: "I looked at that list from when I was 40, and I'd checked everything off that list. And I was less happy at 50 than I was at 40."
As a social scientist, he recognized that he was doing something wrong and analyzed it.
"This is a neurophysiological problem and a psychological problem all rolled into one handy package," he said. "I was making the mistake of thinking that my satisfaction would come from having more. And the truth of the matter is that lasting and stable satisfaction, which doesn't wear off in a minute, comes when you understand that your satisfaction is your haves divided by your wants…You can increase your satisfaction temporarily and inefficiently by having more, or permanently and securely by wanting less."
Brooks concluded that he needed a "reverse bucket list" that would help him "consciously detach" from his worldly wants and desires by simply writing them down and crossing them off.
"I know that these things are going to occur to me as natural goals," Brooks said, citing human evolutionary psychology. "But I do not want to be owned by them. I want to manage them." He discussed moving those desires from the instinctual limbic system to the conscious pre-frontal cortex by examining each one and saying, "Maybe I get it, maybe I don't," but crossing them off as attachments. "And I'm free…it works," he said.
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"When I write them down, I acknowledge that I have the desire," he explained on X. "When I cross them out, I acknowledge that I will not be attached to this goal."
The idea that attachment itself causes unhappiness is a concept found in many spiritual traditions, but it is most closely associated with Buddhism. Mike Brooks, PhD, explains that humans need healthy attachments, such as an attachment to staying alive and attachments to loved ones, to avoid suffering. But many things to which we are attached are not necessarily healthy, either by degree (over-attachment) or by nature (being attached to things that are impermanent).
"We should strive for flexibility in our attachments because the objects of our attachment are inherently in flux," Brooks writes in Psychology Today. "In this way, we suffer unnecessarily when we don't accept their impermanent nature."
What Arthur C. Brooks suggests that we strive to detach ourselves from our wants and desires because the simplest way to solve the 'haves/wants = happiness' formula is to reduce the denominator. The reverse bucket list, in which you cross off desires before you fulfill them, can help free you from attachment and lead to a happier overall existence.
This article originally appeared last year.
The days of folding maps are long gone, but not forgotten.
Those of us who lived life on Earth before the internet and GPS have memories that today's young people will never have. Stopping at a gas station to pick up a local road map. Keeping a road atlas the size of a textbook under the passenger seat. The agony of having to try to refold a map in the clunky confines of your car.
It's easy to forget what life was like before cell phones fit in your pocket and Google Maps took you from point A to point B in real-time. But Gen Z, whose oldest members haven't even reached 30 yet, has never lived that struggle, so they have no frame of reference for what their elders had to do to find their way around.
One self-proclaimed Gen Zer named Aneisha took to social media to ask the question that has been burning on her mind–how did people travel before GPS?
@aneishaaaaaaaaaaa I hope this reaches the right people, i want to know
Aneisha asks in her video, "Okay, serious question. How did people get around before the GPS? Like, did you guys actually pull a map and like draw lines to your destination? But then how does that work when you're driving by yourself, trying to hold up the map and drive? I know it's Gen Z of me, but I kind of want to know."
Even when most Millennials were starting to drive, they had some form of internet to download turn-by-turn directions, so it makes sense that the cohort between Gen Z and Gen X would direct Aneisha to Mapquest — a primitive early ancestor of Google Maps.
"We'd have to print step-by-step directions from MapQuest and hope for the best," one commenter wrote.
It's true, you're not really a Millennial if you've never driven around with a stack of loose MapQuest pages floating around your car. If you were lucky, you had a passenger to read them off to you. "Drive half a mile and turn left on Elm Street!" It was a stressful time, for sure. God help you if the pages got mixed up or if you went off track somewhere. Even with a printed map and directions, there was no guidance for finding your way back to the proper route.
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But there was a time before imaginary tiny pirates lived inside of computer screens to point you in the right direction, and tales from those times are reserved for Gen X.
MapQuest, by some standards, was an incredible luxury made possible by the internet. So the generation known for practically raising themselves chimed in, not only to sarcastically tell Millennials to sit down but to set the record straight on what travel was like before the invention of the internet. Someone clearly unamused by younger folks' suggestion shares, "The people saying MapQuest. There was a time before the internet kids."
Others are a little more helpful, like one person who writes, "You mentally note landmarks, intersections. Pretty easy actually," they continue. "stop at a gas station, open map in the store, ($4.99), put it back (free)."
"Believe it or not, yes we did use maps back then. We look at it before we leave, then take small glances to see what exits to take," someone says, which leaves Aneisha in disbelief, replying, "That's crazy, I can't even read a map."
Everyone had to know how to read a map. Photo credit: Canva
It's a good idea to keep a local map in your car, even today! In case of emergency, you never know when it might come in handy. Learning how to read it, however, might take a little time for folks who didn't grow up using non-digital maps. (Many young people are confident in their ability to read maps based on their heavy GPS usage, but something tells me those skills won't translate to the big according-style paper maps.)
Some users added that you could often call your destination (or friend or family member) and write down careful directions before you left. If you've ever visited a venue or business's website and seen general directions depending on which direction you're traveling from, you get the idea.
"Pulled over and asked the guy at the gas station," one person writes as another chimes in under the comment, "and then ask the guy down the street to make sure you told me right."
Imagine being a gas station attendant in the '90s while also being directionally challenged. Was that part of the hiring process, memorizing directions for when customers came in angry or crying because they were lost? Not knowing where you were going before the invention of the internet was also a bit of a brain exercise laced with exposure therapy for those with anxiety. There were no cell phones, so if you were lost, no one who cared about you would know until you could find a payphone to check in. Imagine that!
This car definitely had no GPS. Photo credit: Canva
The world is so connected today that the idea of not being able to simply share your location with loved ones and "Ask Siri" when you've gotten turned around on your route seems dystopian.
But in actuality, if you took a few teens from 1993 and plopped them into 2024, they'd think they were living in a sci-fi movie waiting for aliens to invade.
Technology has made our lives infinitely easier and nearly unrecognizable from the future most could've imagined before the year 2000, so it's not Gen Z's fault that they're unaware of how the "before times" were. They're simply a product of their generation.
Some would say that having a rough geographical understanding of your local area, aka being able to navigate around without GPS, is a lost art that kept our brains and wits sharper. On the other hand, using Google Maps even for simple trips to everyday stops helps us avoid accidents and traffic and give people our near-exact ETA. It also delivers crucial real-time information about wildfires, natural disasters, and more. Who's to say if one way is really better or worse?
This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.