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Writer shares delightful quotes from his 'mum' from before she died, and people are in love

Darby Hudson's mother had a uniquely wonder-filled perspective that has people laughing and crying.

Courtesy of Darby Hudson/Instagram

Darby Hudson's mom said the most profound things in the simplest way.

This world is filled with all kinds of people, each a mixed bag of qualities and quirks, virtues and vices. This "being human" business is complex and none of us has everything figured out, but sometimes a person comes along who's able to tap into the magical, wonder-filled side of life and express it in a way that touches people universally.

Darby Hudson's mom—hereby known as "Mum"—was one of those people, and we're all getting to know her posthumously through her delightful "Alive things Mum said to me before she died" quotes shared by Hudson. Gems like this:

"Darby, love, there's so much sadness in the world yet I'm always falling in love with the day. There's almost too much to fall in love with."

"Darby, love, I'm struggling to fit this one life into this one life. But sometimes I feel this weightless heaviness for all the lives I wish I'd lived. But then I think in all those lives I'd have still seen the same moon at night."

quotes, inspiration, darby hudson, darby love, momAll of Mum's quotes begin with "Darby, love…"Courtesy of Darby Hudson/Instagram

"Darby, love, sometimes I think I'm just too alive. Is there such a thing as being too alive?"

"Darby, love, there is so much beauty in the world. Also, I hope you've been keeping up with the politics in this country, terrible things are happening. Oh, look at that cloud, it looks like a pelican! Do you see it too, love?!"

"Darby, love, when you go for a walk remember to tell things you love them aloud: trees, clouds, fire hydrants. Tell all the things you love them."

"Darby, love, life is a walk in the park. But with rabid stray dogs and someone going to mug you. But on a beautiful day, of course, and that's all that matters."

Some of the quotes are breathtakingly beautiful snippets of reflective wisdom, like "Darby, love, everything you need is inside of you. How do you look inside of you? When you no longer have a choice." And some of them are a whole different kind of wisdom, such as: "Darby, love, never apologise then fart."

Hudson tells Upworthy that his mom loved books, especially mythology, poetry, and the classics. She had been a librarian, a high school teacher, and then a barrister (a lawyer, for the Americans reading).

"She was a bit of a dreamer yet strangely operated in the brutal world of logic," Hudson says, adding, "Barristers need to turn sentences into a form of algebra to be able to argue." He thinks her being Irish helped her in that work.

Like many people who shine brightly, Hudson's mom could also fall into deep despair. As their relationship grew closer in adulthood, Hudson learned how he could tap into her bright side to help pull her from the darkness.

quotes, inspiration, darby hudson, darby love, mom"See which emotion wins."Courtesy of Darby Hudson/Instagram

"She lived like a bit of a hermit and a local eccentric into her old age," he tells Upworthy. "She was a little sideways and taught me a lot about how to view the world and we often completed each others' thoughts. Later in life, I felt like she was less my mum and more my 'sister' and that's when our relationship got a lot better! As long as I could lure her into a sense of play, she would move from her darkness and hopeless view of the world and into a sense of magic. We all have those two sides—one of politics and one of magic. Her magic side was beautiful!"

Hudson collected all of her quotes in a book, "DARBY, LOVE..." which he said came to him during the time between Christmas and New Year's, when "days of the week don’t exist and you could feel politics drop away and magic return." He wrote in the introduction:

"Mum was a stranger to this world – she belonged to one of magic and dreams. On her good days, she was unstoppable, pure spirit. And while her darkness was pure despair, almost out of necessity, it was countered with the most incredible light. And in these current times – a world that can feel so dark – I wanted to share mum’s brightest self.

These pages hold the truth of most of what mum did and said – but they’re also an inspired love letter to her voice, channelling and capturing the spirit of the strangest, most poetic soul I’ve ever known. Some of the most 'famous' people I’ve ever met have no followers, no audience. Mum was one. I was lucky to call her mum, even if her lingering spirit still drives me up the wall sometimes."

People have been moved by both Hudson's mum's words and his celebration of her "magic."

"Darby love, this is the single most beautiful thing I’ve encountered on my device today. I’m going to jump offline now, for fear of ruining this magic - will return tomorrow for more musings (and after I’ve told the lizards on my walk that I love them)."

"What a blessing to have a mother with such a lovely spirit, so funny yet full of wisdom. My favorite: 'Darby, love, I often get the feeling that there's something very wrong with me and then another feeling comes rushing in from behind saying there's something very right with me.' That says it all about her personality 💜✨ Thanks for sharing! She must be tremendously missed, but you're keeping her essence alive!"

"Your mum’s thoughts sound so beautiful. How often have I thought to myself 'I’m struggling to fit this one life into this one life' so perfectly stated."

"I’ve never missed anyone I’ve never met before. How bout that!"

quotes, inspiration, darby hudson, darby love"Don't let it explain the magic away."Courtesy of Darby Hudson/Instagram

"I am pretty sure I love your mum. These are some of the best things I’ve ever read. Being a mother myself. In my mind possibly with the same colorful, mysterious and beautiful outlook on life and hope to have my 'legacy' of expression passed down to my children 💕"

"Your mum's words are like a eating a bowl of chicken noodle soup while being held. I want to smile and cry at the same time."

"The best thing I’ve ever read in a long time. Darby, love, you got lucky with that one."

What better way to honor the unique light a loved one brought to the world than to share glimmers of their everyday brilliance? Thank you for sharing your mum's words with us, Darby. May we all take her magical whimsy and beautiful perspective on life to heart.


You can find more of Darby Hudson's work on Instagram and find his book, "DARBY, LOVE…" here.

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This is the obituary of a 'very sick man' and it's so funny you'll wish you knew him

That said, you'd never want to date one of his daughters.

via Legacy.com

The obituary for Joe Heller

Joe Heller (1937 - 2019) of Essex, Connecticut appears to have lived a full life: he was in the Navy, worked at the Yale library, and raised three daughters. But he was also a hoarder, a hardcore napper, and loved pulling pranks that involved feces.

Well, as Abe Lincoln once said, "A man without vices is a man without virtues." His hilarious obituary, believed to be penned by one of his daughters, is going viral because it paints a loving picture of a man who clearly didn't take life too seriously — a lesson we could all use from time to time.

The obituary opens with a helluva zinger.

Joe Heller made his last undignified and largely irreverent gesture on Sept. 8, 2019, signing off on a life, in his words, 'generally well-lived and with few regrets.' When the doctors confronted his daughters with the news last week that 'your father is a very sick man,' in unison they replied, 'you have no idea.'


Joe Heller, obituaries, funny, death, dying, humor, family Joe Heller's obituary photoImage via the Hartford Courant obituaries

In his youth, Heller played the role of a prankster.

Being the eldest was a dubious task but he was up for the challenge and led and tortured his siblings through a childhood of obnoxious pranks, with his brother, Bob, generally serving as his wingman. Pat, Dick and Kathy were often on the receiving end of such lessons as "Ding Dong, Dogsh*t" and thwarting lunch thieves with laxative-laced chocolate cake and excrement meatloaf sandwiches. His mother was not immune to his pranks as he named his first dog, "Fart," so she would have to scream his name to come home if he wandered off.


He met the "love of his life" at work and his daughter can't believe he fooled her into marriage.

Joe was a self-taught chemist and worked at Cheeseborough-Ponds where he developed one of their first cosmetics' lines. There he met the love of his life, Irene, who was hoodwinked into thinking he was a charming individual with decorum. Boy, was she ever wrong. Joe embarrassed her daily with his mouth and choice of clothing. To this day we do not understand how he convinced our mother, an exceedingly proper woman and a pillar in her church, to sew and create the colorful costumes and props which he used for his antics.

Heller had a knack for creatively intimidating his daughters' boyfriends.

Growing up in Joe's household was never dull. If the old adage of "You only pull the hair of those you love" holds true, his three daughters were well loved. Joe was a frequent customer of the girls' beauty shops, allowing them to "do" his hair and apply make-up liberally. He lovingly assembled doll furniture and built them a play kitchen and forts in the back yard. During their formative years, Joe made sure that their moral fibers were enriched by both Archie Bunker and Benny Hill. When they began dating, Joe would greet their dates by first running their license plates and checking for bald tires. If their vehicle passed inspection, they were invited into the house where shotguns, harpoons and sheep "nutters" were left clearly on display.


obituaries, funny, death, dying, familyStuck on you! #snoopy #woodstock #stickers #forsale #colle… | Flickrwww.flickr.com

He never met a dog he didn't like.

After retiring from running Bombaci Fuel, he was perhaps, most well-known for his role as the Essex Town "Dawg Kecher." He refused to put any of his "prisoners" down and would look for the perfect homes for them. One of them was a repeat offender who he named "A**hole" because no owner would ever keep him for very long because he was, in fact, an a**hole. My Dad would take his buddy on daily rides in his van and they'd roam around town with the breeze blowing through both of their fur. He never met a dog he didn't like, the same could not be said for the wanna-be blue bloods, snoots and summer barnacles that roamed about town.

He had a small issue with hoarding.

Joe was a frequent shopper at the Essex Dump and he left his family with a house full of crap, 300 pounds of birdseed and dead houseplants that they have no idea what to do with. If there was ever a treasure that he snatched out from under you among the mounds of junk, please wait the appropriate amount of time to contact the family to claim your loot.

Joe Heller, obituaries, death, dying, family, humor, funnyA hoarder's garageImage via Canva

Heller was born with an innate napping ability.

Joe was also a consummate napper. There wasn't a road, restaurant or friend's house in Essex that he didn't fall asleep on or in. There wasn't an occasion too formal or an event too dour that Joe didn't interrupt with his apnea and voluminous snoring.

According to the obituary, Heller will be laid to rest on Friday, September 13, at 10:00 am in Centerbrook Cemetery, but his family urges attendees to dress casually.

Joe despised formality and stuffiness and would really be ticked off if you showed up in a suit. Dress comfortably. The family encourages you to don the most inappropriate T-Shirt that you are comfortable being seen in public with as Joe often did. Everybody has a Joe story and we'd love to hear them all. Joe faced his death and his mortality, as he did with his life, face on, often telling us that when he dropped dead to dig a hole in the back yard and just roll him in.

You can read the entire obituary at Legacy.com.


This article originally appeared on 9.10.19

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Volunteer uses her incredible singing voice to comfort dying patient on 'final journey home'

The woman requested her and her husband's favorite song, "The Power of Love."

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What a beautiful way to show up for others.

There's something really magical about what music does to our brains. Have you ever found yourself remembering a commercial jingle you haven't heard in decades? Or have you ever wondered why you can't remember what you ate yesterday but you can recite the lyrics of thousands of songs on-demand without even thinking?

If you've ever seen the end of the 2017 Disney movie Coco, you also know that music can trigger memories, emotions, a boost of energy, and even joy in people who are otherwise nearly unresponsive or have lost much of their will to go on. And if you're thinking that was just an incredibly emotional moment in a sweet movie, it's true; science backs it up. That makes it an amazing and mysterious therapeutic tool in medical settings, and an incredible way to comfort people who may be scared or confused.


gif from the movie CocoMiguel and Mama Coco from Coco.Giphy

Yvon Kanters, a social worker, has been volunteering in nursing homes for years. She has gone viral for her incredible interactions with patients, where she uses her beautiful voice to connect with them and bring them joy in dark moments.

In one recent video, Kanters is shown riding in the back of an ambulance with a woman on a stretcher. The woman is a cancer patient who had just been told by doctors that there was no further treatment available. This would be her last ride home from the hospital. Kanters volunteered to come along and sing the woman a song for comfort.

"When we walked into the room, she was there with her husband and was very optimistic, she was very full of life," Kanters told Newsweek. "We brought her to the ambulance and then asked her, 'I'm a singer and I'm coming along for the day, is there something you want to hear?' She and her husband, they love each other—their love is so visible. She said she and her husband's song was 'The Power of Love.'"

"The Power of Love," of course, is the hit single by Jennifer Rush from 1984. The next year year, it became the number one song in the UK. A cover by Celine Dion years later made it the biggest song in the US. It's an incredibly romantic song, and it speaks volumes about the woman's life that she would choose to hear it at this moment.

"As I sang, I saw tears well up in her eyes. A song that held so much more meaning than just words and melody. After this moment, we continued with a small, intimate living room concert... one that will stay in my heart forever," Kanters said.

Watch the incredible moment here:

@yvonkanters

𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗣𝗢𝗪𝗘𝗥 𝗢𝗙 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 | 𝗠𝗲𝗲 𝗼𝗽 𝗱𝗲 𝗮𝗺𝗯𝘂𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗺𝗲𝘁 𝗭𝘂𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗔𝗻𝗶𝘁𝗮 Sommige ontmoetingen blijven je altijd bij. Gisteren zong ik voor een bijzondere vrouw, een vechter vol levenslust. Ze werd door Zuster Anita van de middencomplex ambulance naar huis gebracht om haar laatste tijd met haar geliefden door te brengen. Geen spoedrit, maar een rit vol betekenis. Ze hield van álle muziek, maar toen ik vroeg of ze een speciaal liedje had samen met haar man, hoefde ze niet na te denken: "The Power of Love." Terwijl ik zong, zag ik de tranen in haar ogen verschijnen. Een lied dat zoveel meer betekende dan alleen muziek. Na dit moment deden we nog een klein huiskamerconcert.. een herinnering die voor altijd zal blijven. Dankjewel Zuster Anita, en dankjewel aan deze prachtige vrouw voor het delen van dit bijzondere moment. Liefde is de kracht die blijft. 💛✨ #ThePowerOfLove #AmbulanceZorg #MiddencomplexAmbulance #MuziekVerbindt #LiefdeEnVerbinding #MuziekInDeZorg #Muziektherapie #YvonKanters ______________________________ 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗣𝗢𝗪𝗘𝗥 𝗢𝗙 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 | 𝗢𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗔𝗺𝗯𝘂𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗡𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲 𝗔𝗻𝗶𝘁𝗮 Some encounters stay with you forever. Yesterday, I sang for a remarkable woman, an fighter full of life. She was being transported home by Nurse Anita and the mid-complex ambulance, a service for patients who need medical supervision but no emergency care. No sirens, but a journey filled with meaning. She loved all kinds of music, but when I asked if she had a special song with her husband, she didn’t hesitate: "The Power of Love." As I sang, I saw tears well up in her eyes. A song that held so much more meaning than just words and melody. After this moment, we continued with a small, intimate living room concert.. one that will stay in my heart forever. Thank you, Nurse Anita, and thank you to this beautiful woman for sharing this moment with me. Love is the power that never fades. 💛✨ #ThePowerOfLove #AmbulanceCare #MidComplexAmbulance #MusicUnites #HealingThroughMusic #MusicTherapy #YvonKanters

Over four million people watched the video and couldn't get enough of the kindness and compassion on display.

Commenters were absolutely stunned:

"It’s the most beautiful thing I saw today"

"this needs a warning, I'm at work crying"

"oh my god what a wonderful way to go"

"The look of love, care and compassion in this young lady’s eyes for her fellow human - beautiful"

"former hospice nurse here.. I absolutely love this!"

Music is an amazing tool for patients who are near death or suffering from severe dementia. It lives in parts of the brain that are usually less affected by Alzheimer's and dementia, often making music memories the last "to go" as brain function and bodily systems fail.

Even younger people with great memory loss have been shown to remember how to play music or sing lyrics or even dance despite not knowing the names of their loved ones. This phenomenon, crucially, is not just a novelty. It's a proven tool that caregivers use to connect with their patients. Studies show that mood and engagement actually improves in patients after hearing and interacting with music, not just during.

Live music, too, carries a special power. Having a real human being singing to you stimulates the brain more powerfully than listening to recorded music does, forming a unique connection between performer and audience that a speaker can't replicate.

@yvonkanters

AVE MARIA | Rudy (English below) Ik ben net zo fan van Rudy als jullie! Daarom wil ik dit prachtige gebed ook laten horen. Rudy heeft in zijn leven veel steun gehad aan muziek. Het was zijn manier van communiceren naar de buitenwereld. Het is een manier van luisteren en antwoorden op elkaar. Dat vind ik ook heel duidelijk te zien aan hem. Hij luistert zo bijzonder goed naar het notenbeeld en wat er gaat komen. Daarop reageert hij weer. Het is een dans van woorden in het Latijn. Een prachtige verbinding en kippenvel. Dank Rudy ♥️ #zingen #dementie #liefde #zorg #fyp #viral #avemaria #gounod #muziektherapie #muziek ———————— AVE MARIA | Rudy I'm just as much of a fan of Rudy as you are! That's why I want to share this beautiful prayer. Rudy has had a lot of support from music in his life. It was his way of communicating to the outside world. It is a way of listening and responding to each other. I think that is very clear in him. He listens very well to the notes and what is to come. He then responds again. It is a dance of words in Latin. A beautiful connection and goosebumps for me. Bless his soul♥️ #singing #dementia #love #care #fyp #viral #avemaria #gounod #musictherapy #music

In another clip from Kanters, she sings "Ave Maria" to an elderly man with dementia who miraculously perks up and even manages to sing along. It's incredible to watch, and it demonstrates that we're really just beginning to scratch the surface when it comes to the power of music as a therapeutic tool.

But for now, it's just amazing and heartwarming to watch a beautiful moment between a volunteer artist and someone in need.

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I had a couple of months to live and what I'm grateful for is not what you'd think

I did find joy in just the tiniest of ways. Here are a few of them.

Sometimes, although well-intentioned, people say the most infuriating stuff when you're facing a health crisis. I know, because it happened to me. After being diagnosed with a fast-moving aortic aneurysm, I was told I was on borrowed time. What a concept! As if I'd gone to the bank and taken out a "time-loan."

Soonish after, I was being lifted onto a gurney by a bunch of dudes who never did introduce themselves. Luckily, I had an amazing surgeon at a top-notch hospital and they took my heart out, (I was on a breathing machine, relax), stitched it up with some kind of polyester netting and sent me off to recovery.

I recall, just seconds before I went under, someone in the room announcing my name, age, height and reason for surgery. Cecily Knobler, 25 year-old female (just kidding, but no one needs my REAL age) 62 inches, aneurysm in the aortic root. I remember thinking in that split second, we are so much more than our names and our inches. We are wine-cooler nights at a mosquito-ridden park in 11th grade. We are the love we had for our dogs and our Big Dipper starry-night crushes and our favorite New Wave songs. We are not our skin or our chemo or our lungs or our fear.

Sometimes when you're in that hospital bed, loved ones just don't know what to say. A lot will tell you once it's all behind you, you'll have a new lease on life. The sunshine will be sunnier, that every breath is a gift, blah, blah, blah. The truth is sometimes it's hard to not get stuck in the woe-is-me cycle of "why did this happen to me?" and/or "what next?"

But I did find joy in just the tiniest of ways. Here are a few:

A strawberry milkshake

strawberry shake in clear drinking glass Photo by Denis on Unsplash

Yep. That simple. Someone went to the cafeteria in the hospital and surprised me with a frothy delicious milkshake I didn't even know I needed. Paired with my tasty IV drip, it was just what the doctor didn't order!

My hospital TV had HBO

lena dunham what GIF by Girls on HBOGiphy

I mean, once I was able to understand the remote, I was overjoyed to see I could watch old episodes of Girls. It hit differently on very little sleep, but I loved it just the same.

A video of my dog

Hungry Dog GIF by Rashmi ChadhaGiphy

A friend who was keeping my mutt while I was "away" sent me iPhone footage of him rolling around in some dirt. It made my heart so full, I almost had to get surgery again!

A night nurse made me laugh

Vintage Nurse GIFGiphy

One of the day nurses and I got into a little tiff. She was trying get me to do a lap on my walker (which apparently is quite good for you) and I told her, "No thanks." We went back and forth for awhile and she finally gave up. Later, when my favorite nurse started his shift at 7:00pm, I told him she had been a bit of a jerk. (I might have used stronger language than that.) He laughed and said, "Oh she's the WORST." This took me by surprise and it was the first laugh I'd had in a long while!

My first bubble bath…3 months later

bored bath GIF by theCHIVEGiphy

After this particular surgery, you're advised to not drive or take baths for 90 days. The driving part I didn't care about, but lavender bubble-baths are my favorite thing. I marked the exact day in my calendar when I could return to that daily habit. And on that day, it was the best darn lavender bubble-bath I'd ever had.

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