Teachers are sharing epic quotes from little kids, and they're so wholesome and hilarious

They say that kids say the darnedest things, and seriously, they do. Anyone who has spent any significant amount of time with young children knows that sometimes the things they say can blow your mind.
Since teachers spend more time around little kids than anyone else, they are particularly privy to their profound and hilarious thoughts. That's why NYC kindergarten teacher Alyssa Cowit started collecting kid quotes from teachers around the country and sharing them on her Instagram account, Live from Snack Time, as well as her websiteand other social media channels.
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Facebook user Joshua Seaman shared a collection of the quotes in a Facebook post that's been shared nearly 300,000 times in less than a week. People simply adore seeing the innocent, wholesome perspective of children—especially when they say something that makes us go, "SAME, little one. SAME"
For example, "I thought I needed a hug but I really need pancakes." That's a totally familiar feeling, kid. Totally.

Or the kid who said, "I am OK. I have more happy than I do sad." I mean, that's most of us on a basic level, right?

But the 7-year-old who said, "I'm not feeling very worky today," is literally all of us.
SAME, little one. SAME.

Some kids are just hilariously honest, like the 8-year-old who said, "My mom says I should just ignore people I don't like and well, that's you." Dang, that's harsh, Noah.

And heaven help the parents of the 7-year-old who said, "I appreciate my teachers for teaching me words that help me argue with my parents."

I'm seriously feeling this silver lining-finding 10-year-old who said, "I wanted detention so I could be alone and read my book. Thank you." I AM A MOTHER OF THREE. PUT ME IN DETENTION, PLEASE AND THANK YOU.

But nothing beats the realness of this 5-year-old sharing their weekend plans. "I'll tell you what I'm going to do this weekend. I'm not going to put a shirt on. Probably not pants either."
SAME, little one. SAME.

Sometimes kids are funny because they take everything literally. For example, the morally superior 5-year-old who didn't understand the phrase "piece of cake":
"She said it was a piece of cake.
But there was no cake at all.
She lied about the cake.
That's NOT something to be proud of."

And sometimes kids are funny because they replace unfamiliar words with ones they know better, turning weed into pasta sauce:
"My brother got in trouble for smoking marinara." - anonymous, 8 years old

But occasionally, kids come out with something sweetly profound, that makes you say, "Awww. True." Like this:
"When your heart is broken, it's like a thunderstorm on the inside." Right on, Joey. We feel that.
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Or they show you in some unique way how big their little hearts can be—like 6-year-old Walter, who said, "Whenever you cry I wish I was a spider. Then I would spin you a tissue." Aww, thanks, Walter.

The quotes seem to be showing up everywhere. A clever Facebook user, Sharon Sturnfield, even
assigned astrological signs to some of the kid quotes. (As a Pisces, I gotta say I totally feel seen by this.)
Kids really are the best. Keep those quotes coming, teachers. We can all use a little more innocent wholesomeness in our lives.
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A Generation Jones teenager poses in her room.Image via Wikmedia Commons
An office kitchen.via
An angry man eating spaghetti.via 
At least it wasn't Bubbles.
You just know there's a person named Whiskey out there getting a kick out of this. 


An Irish woman went to the doctor for a routine eye exam. She left with bright neon green eyes.
It's not easy seeing green.
Did she get superpowers?
Going to the eye doctor can be a hassle and a pain. It's not just the routine issues and inconveniences that come along when making a doctor appointment, but sometimes the various devices being used to check your eyes' health feel invasive and uncomfortable. But at least at the end of the appointment, most of us don't look like we're turning into The Incredible Hulk. That wasn't the case for one Irish woman.
Photographer Margerita B. Wargola was just going in for a routine eye exam at the hospital but ended up leaving with her eyes a shocking, bright neon green.
At the doctor's office, the nurse practitioner was prepping Wargola for a test with a machine that Wargola had experienced before. Before the test started, Wargola presumed the nurse had dropped some saline into her eyes, as they were feeling dry. After she blinked, everything went yellow.
Wargola and the nurse initially panicked. Neither knew what was going on as Wargola suddenly had yellow vision and radioactive-looking green eyes. After the initial shock, both realized the issue: the nurse forgot to ask Wargola to remove her contact lenses before putting contrast drops in her eyes for the exam. Wargola and the nurse quickly removed the lenses from her eyes and washed them thoroughly with saline. Fortunately, Wargola's eyes were unharmed. Unfortunately, her contacts were permanently stained and she didn't bring a spare pair.
- YouTube youtube.com
Since she has poor vision, Wargola was forced to drive herself home after the eye exam wearing the neon-green contact lenses that make her look like a member of the Green Lantern Corps. She couldn't help but laugh at her predicament and recorded a video explaining it all on social media. Since then, her video has sparked a couple Reddit threads and collected a bunch of comments on Instagram:
“But the REAL question is: do you now have X-Ray vision?”
“You can just say you're a superhero.”
“I would make a few stops on the way home just to freak some people out!”
“I would have lived it up! Grab a coffee, do grocery shopping, walk around a shopping center.”
“This one would pair well with that girl who ate something with turmeric with her invisalign on and walked around Paris smiling at people with seemingly BRIGHT YELLOW TEETH.”
“I would save those for fancy special occasions! WOW!”
“Every time I'd stop I'd turn slowly and stare at the person in the car next to me.”
“Keep them. Tell people what to do. They’ll do your bidding.”
In a follow-up Instagram video, Wargola showed her followers that she was safe at home with normal eyes, showing that the damaged contact lenses were so stained that they turned the saline solution in her contacts case into a bright Gatorade yellow. She wasn't mad at the nurse and, in fact, plans on keeping the lenses to wear on St. Patrick's Day or some other special occasion.
While no harm was done and a good laugh was had, it's still best for doctors, nurses, and patients alike to double-check and ask or tell if contact lenses are being worn before each eye test. If not, there might be more than ultra-green eyes to worry about.