'Fear-setting': How a bestselling author conquers anxiety by writing down worst nightmares

What if I told you the secret to success isn't setting goals—but setting fears?

In a world obsessed with vision boards and goal-setting apps, bestselling author Tim Ferriss is dropping truth bombs that flip conventional wisdom on its head: "Defining your fears is more important than defining your goals."

What?

This simple shift in perspective helped Ferriss change his life—and countless others—to break free from paralysis and take the bold actions he'd been dreaming about for years.

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Welcome to the life-changing practice of fear-setting—a monthly ritual that could be the missing piece in your personal development puzzle.

Why our fears keep us stuck (and how to turn them into fuel)

Picture this: You're lying in bed at 3 a.m., your mind racing about that "risky" career change you've been contemplating for years. The voice in your head whispers all the myriad ways it could go wrong—financial ruin, professional embarrassment, that meme of Marnie from Girls where she says, "Let's make fun of the girl who took a risk and put herself out there creatively." What if that were you?

Here's the funny thing about fear: it's a master manipulator. Fear warps our thinking, causing our brains to exaggerate potential disasters while overlooking the cost of staying stuck. Before long, we become prisoners of our own imagination, suffering more in our minds than we would in real life.

But what would happen if we could flip the script? Instead of running from our fears, we could cut them open and realize that the monster we've been running from all this time was nothing more than a stack of clothes, piled up on a chair.

Enter Tim Ferriss' fear-setting exercise—a systematic approach to transforming paralyzing anxiety into empowering action.

The 7 questions that changed everything

Tim Ferriss is an all-American multi-hyphenate: he's an entrepreneur, author, podcaster, and one of the most influential figures in today's productivity and lifestyle design space. Wired called him "the Superman of Silicon Valley." His multi-faceted empire includes five #1 New York Times bestsellers, including The 4-Hour Workweek and Tools of Titans: The Tactics, Routines, and Habits of Billionaires, Icons, and World-Class Performers. Ferriss also hosts the eponymous The Tim Ferriss Show podcast, the first business/interview podcast to exceed 100 million downloads. (It has now exceeded one billion downloads, by the way.)

In short, this is a person who knows a thing or two about high achievement.

Tim Ferriss revealed that he dedicates up to half an hour each month to confronting his fears head-on through seven critical questions. It's a thorough and rational dissection of what scares him the most.

Question 1: What's your nightmare?

Define your nightmare. What is the absolute worst that could happen if you followed through with what you're considering?

Get specific. Avoid writing broad fears, such as "failure." Remember, this is an activity designed to let your brain go into full disaster mode: use your creativity and imagination.

For example, you want to start painting, even though you know nothing about it and are "too old" to begin a new hobby. But what would happen if you took a class or started going to museums more often? Seriously, what's the worst that could happen?

People start pointing and staring at you, the most out-of-touch person ever to exist? Your teacher comes to look at your work and starts laughing uncontrollably? Write it all down in painful detail. Then Ferriss advises, rate the permanent impact scale on a scale of 1-10. You'll often discover that your worst-case scenarios aren't life-ruiners—or, not even likely to happen at all.

Then, ask yourself: Would it be the end of your life? Are these things really permanent? How likely would they actually happen?

Question 2: How could you repair the damage?

If the very worst were to happen, how could you rebuild, even temporarily? Could you get your money back from the art institution? Leave a scathing review on Yelp? Go into therapy for your troubles? Often, we discover that the road to recovery is more possible than we imagined.

Question 3: What are the benefits of trying?

Ask yourself, what are the outcomes or benefits, both temporary and permanent, of more likely scenarios?

Fear-setting turns into sunsetting. Let's change it up: even if you don't achieve complete success (ex., your art teacher tears up when reviewing your first painting project and suggests someone should hang it in the Louvre), what could you gain just from putting yourself out there? New skills, confidence, friends, experiences?

Now, rate these benefits on a scale of 1 to 10 as well. Compare these with the numbers you provided in question #1. Are you shelving your dreams, a potential 9 (!), just because of an unrealistic fear that you rated a 3?

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Question 4: What if you were starting over today?

If you were fired from your job today, what would you do to get things under financial control?

Imagine this scenario and run through questions 1-3 above. If you quit your job to test other opportunities, how could you later get back on the same career track if you absolutely had to?

This question isn't fear-mongering (remember, this is fear-setting.) It builds resilience by reminding you of your resourcefulness. Could you freelance? Take a part-time job? Sell possessions? You're more capable of handling setbacks than you think.

Question 5: What are you putting off out of fear?

"Usually, what we most fear doing is what we most need to do," Ferriss rationalizes. "A person's success in life can usually be measured by the number of uncomfortable conversations he or she is willing to have."

That phone call. A difficult conversation. That creative project. Fear of the unknown often prevents us from taking the very actions that could transform our lives. Define the worst-case scenario, accept it: then do it. Promise yourself to do one thing every single day that you fear.

Question 6: What's the cost of doing nothing?

What is it costing you—financially, emotionally, and physically—to postpone action?

This may be the most crucial question of all, says Ferriss. If you don't pursue what excites you, where will you be in one year? Five years? Ten years? Inaction is the most significant risk of all.

Question 7: Well, what are you waiting for?

"If you cannot answer this without resorting to the concept of "good timing," the answer is simple: You're afraid, just like the rest of the world," writes Ferriss.

In that case, it's time to start again: Measure the cost of inaction. Realize the unlikelihood and repairability of most missteps. Develop the most critical action of those who excel and enjoy doing so: action.

Fear-setting once a month can change your life. Photo credit: Canva

The psychology behind why fear-setting works

Fear-setting is rooted in Stoic philosophy, specifically, the practice of premeditatio malorum: deliberately imagining potential hardships to reduce their psychological impact. Modern psychology confirms what the Stoics knew all along: when we define our fears with specificity, they lose their power over us.

Here's why this approach is so practical:

It manages catastrophic thinking. Vague fears can feel like an ocean: overwhelming and impenetrable. However, specific fears are manageable.

It reveals our hidden resilience. Most people underestimate their ability to recover from setbacks.

It exposes the actual cost of inaction. No one likes losing or embarrassing themselves, but fear is a funny thing: we often ignore the losses that come from not acting.

Your action plan: 30 minutes that could change your life

"I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened." —Mark Twain.

Ready to try fear-setting yourself? Set aside 30 minutes this week. Grab a notebook and work through the seven questions above. Push yourself to be brutally honest: this exercise only works if you're willing to confront your fears directly.

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Tim Ferriss has used this exact process to make significant decisions in his life. And remember that lengthy paragraph earlier? Things turned out pretty well for him.

So, what do you have to lose? Apparently, the answer is "quite a lot." Track down your favorite pen and get to fear-setting. Your future self thanks you.