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Setting the record straight on what it's really like to host a refugee family.

Last October, in response to the worldwide refugee crisis and general encouragement from my church, my family and I signed on as volunteers with the Refugee Services of Texas. We were assigned to furnish an apartment for a refugee family of four, pick them up at the airport, bring them to their new home, provide them their first meal, and stay in contact with them.

These are 10 things I learned from the experience so far.


1. Helping people is rarely glamorous.

It’s very easy to imagine a romanticized meeting at the airport, something you’d see in a movie. The family walks out into the reception area. They see us holding our "Welcome to Texas!" sign and smile brightly. We shake hands. Then embrace. Everyone’s eyes are misty.

But the truth is they trudged through the security doors. They were tired, hungry, and confused. They were concerned about their little boys wandering off and didn’t know where their luggage would be. Their English is about as good as my Arabic. Which is to say, not. Our drive to their apartment was mostly silent due to the language barrier, jet lag, and the general awkwardness of being in a car with complete strangers.

2. Helping people is rarely convenient.

It’s nice to be helpful. Charitable. Magnanimous, even. It’s another thing to give up a couple of perfectly good weekends to spend sweating in an apartment where the air conditioning hasn’t been turned on, assembling book shelves and bed frames with Allen wrenches and hex keys.

It’s not the Peace Corps, but it’s also not writing a check to charity and getting a feel-good bumper sticker in return.

3. Most Americans can’t begin imagine what most refugees have been through.

A Syrian family waits after being escorted into the harbor by the Greek Coastguard, who found them drifting offshore in June 2015. Photo by Dan Kitwood/Getty Images.

The family we were assigned to help was coming from Syria. Actually, they were coming from a Jordanian refugee camp, where they’d been living for two years. Two years. In a tent.

Originally, they're from Homs, Syria. I’d never heard of this city, so I googled it. Homs is a 4,000-year-old city that until recently had a population of more than half a million and was a major industrial center. In 2011, it became a stronghold of the opposition forces in the country’s civil war. Homs was under siege for three years. It has since been almost completely destroyed, with thousands dead. The population is a third of what it was a decade ago. This is the equivalent of Austin, Memphis, Baltimore, or Charlotte being reduced to rubble, the population decimated by our own military.

I found myself asking, "Where would you go? Where could you take your children?"

4. Most Americans are incredibly generous.

The Refugee Service of Texas gave us a list of what this family would need upon arrival. It included everything from mattresses and chairs to cleaning supplies and deodorant. My wife created a registry at Walmart, and we posted it on Facebook. Within a day, 80% of the items were purchased by generous friends from across the United States and even a handful from overseas. By the end of the week, everything had been purchased, and friends were asking if they could continue to make donations in other ways. Most are good people who want to help. They just need to know how.

Our front room, loaded with donations from generous friends around the world. Photo via Greg Christensen.

5. Most Americans don’t know the difference between refugees and immigrants.

In our current political climate, refugees and immigrants are frequently confused or lumped together for expediency. More often, both are simply labeled "foreigners." And not in a good way.

Here’s a simple truth to keep in mind: Immigrants come to this country of their own accord hoping to make a better life for themselves. Refugees flee from their homelands to any country that will take them because their lives are in danger for religious or political reasons. An immigrant hopes to move into your home. A refugee shows up on your doorstep bleeding.

6. Technology is amazing.

Although the wife and mother of the family is fairly conversant in English, her husband and I communicate with Google Translate. I type in an English sentence, the app renders it in Arabic, and I show him my screen. He types in something in Arabic, it’s rendered in English, and he shows his screen to me. It’s very "Star Trek."

7. This is about their kids.

The father, admittedly, would return to Syria if he could. It’s his home. It’s his culture. His people. But he knows his family has nothing to return to, and he knows his children can thrive in the United States. He’s willing to make that sacrifice for them.

8. This is about my kids.

My children helped assemble furniture in their apartment. They were there when the family arrived bleary-eyed and hungry at the airport. My kids have seen their gratitude and sensed their anxiety. Most importantly, my kids know what it’s like to extend a hand to another human being in need.

9. The refugee crisis is real.

A refugee family walks through a field toward the Greek-Macedonia border. Photo by Dan Kitwood/Getty Images.

Today, we tend to equate refugees with Syria because of the civil war — because we’re told ISIS will exploit the refugee camps. But leave theory and politics aside for a second, and consider the fact that there are persecuted Christians in the Democratic Republic of Congo currently seeking refuge. There are hundreds of thousands of refugees from countries nowhere near the seven listed on the president’s current travel ban. While many refugees come from Afghanistan and Somalia, there are also refugees from places like Vietnam, Eritrea, and China who are tired, poor, and yearning to breathe free.

10. Fear and ignorance breed apathy and inaction.

After posting updates on Facebook about our refugee family, I’ve received comments about the need for our country to be safe, for our borders to be secure. I don’t argue that, but these are stock answers. I’ve perceived a swelling refugee villainization birthed from understandings that are over-simplistic at best and ignorant of facts at worst.

When we can rationalize not helping others because of a platitude, it gives us permission to do nothing. When we hastily claim we are for safety, we should ask ourselves if we aren’t really saying we are in favor of not leaving our comfort zones and doing the hard work of being useful.

Refugees are human beings. Treating them as such is a necessity.

Syrian refugees have their portrait taken in the basement of a community center in Hamburg, Germany, where they are living. Photo by Astrid Riecken/Getty Images.

When we took the family to their new apartment, they had friends waiting for them. They were other families they’d known from the Jordanian refugee camp where they’d spent the past two years. They were former denizens of a crippled and shattered city. The women kissed each other. The men kissed hugged each other before kneeling to hug the kids. We got to see their children literally jump for joy.

We didn’t understand their language, but we understood a little better what it meant for people to have hope.

This story first appeared on Medium and is reprinted here with permission.

Can you grow vegetables in a cardboard box?

In the era of supermarkets and wholesale clubs, growing your own food isn't a necessity for most Americans. But that doesn't mean it's not a good idea to try.

A household garden can be a great way to reduce your grocery bill and increase your intake of nutrient-dense foods. It can also be a good source of exercise and a hobby that gets you outside in the sunshine and fresh air more often. However, not everyone has a yard where they can grow a garden or much outdoor space at all where they live. You can plant things in containers, but that requires some upfront investment in planters.

container garden, growing plants in containers, growing vegetables, homegrown, producePotted plants and herbs can thrive in a container garden.Photo credit: Canva

Or does it? Gardener James Prigioni set out to see if an Amazon shipping box would hold up as a planter for potatoes. He took a basic single-walled Amazon box, lined it with dried leaves to help with moisture retention, added four to five inches of soil (his own homegrown soil he makes), added three dark red seed potatoes, covered them with more soil, added a fertilizer, then watered them.

He also planted a second, smaller Amazon box with two white seed potatoes, following the same steps.

Two weeks later, he had potato plants growing out of the soil. Ten days after that, the boxes were filled with lush plants.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Prigioni explained how to "hill" potato plants when they grow tall enough, which helps encourage more tuber growth and protect the growing potatoes from sunlight. Hilling also helps support the plants as they grow taller so they don't flop over. He also added some mulch to help keep the plants cooler as the summer grew hotter.

After hilling, Prigioni only needed to keep up with watering. Both varieties of potatoes flowered, which let him know the tubers were forming. The red potato leaves developed some pest issues, but not bad enough to need intervention, while the white potato plants were unaffected. "It goes to show how variety selection can make a big difference in the garden," he explained.

The visible plants have to start dying before you harvest potatoes, and Prigioni checked in with the boxes themselves when they got to that point.

vegetable garden, growing potatoes, grow potatoes in a cardboard box, Amazon box, farmingFreshly harvested potatoes are so satisfying.Photo credit: Canva

"I am pleasantly surprised with how well the boxes held up," he said, especially for being single-walled boxes. The smaller box was completely intact, while the larger box had begun to split in one corner but not enough to affect the plants' growth. "This thing was completely free to grow in, so you can't beat that," he pointed out.

Prigioni predicted that the red potatoes grown in the larger box would be more productive. As he cut open the box and pulled potatoes from the larger box, they just kept coming, ultimately yielding several dozen potatoes of various sizes. The smaller box did have a smaller yield, but still impressive just from two potatoes planted in an Amazon box.

People often think they don't have room to grow their own food, which is why Prigioni put these potato boxes on his patio. "A lot of people have an area like this," he said.

"I will never look at cardboard boxes the same," Prigioni added. "There are so many uses for them in the garden and it's just a great free resource we have around, especially if you're ordering stuff from Amazon all the time."

cardboard box, container garden, amazon box, growing vegetables, gardeningDo you see a box or do you see a planter?Photo credit: Canva

People loved watching Prigioni's experiment and shared their own joy—and success—in growing potatoes in a similar fashion:

"I have been growing potatoes in every box I can find for several years now. I have had excellent success. I honestly think potatoes prefer cardboard. And yes, most of my boxes were from Amazon."

"I live in an upstairs apartment with a little deck and I have a container garden with containers on every single stair leading to the deck. I grow potatoes in a laundry basket. It's amazing how much food I can get from this type of garden!! Grateful."

"I literally got up and grabbed the empty boxes by our front door, the potatoes that have started to sprout, and soil i had inside and started my planting at 1am. Lol. I will take them outside today and finish. Thank you James!"

"I grew potatoes and tomatoes on my tiny balcony in Germany (in buckets and cardboard boxes). Now I have a big garden here in America. I so love to grow my own food."

"I grew sweet potatoes in cardboard boxes. It’s so much fun."

Next time you're stuck with an Amazon box that you don't have a use for, consider whether you could use it as a planter for potatoes or some other edible harvest. Gardening doesn't have to be fancy to be effective.

You can find more of gardening experiments on The Gardening Channel with James Prigioni.

Inside Edition/YouTube

Former Miss Teen Arkansas Mackenzie Scott helps single mom Kayla Jo Singleterry at nail salon.

When single mom Kayla Jo Singleterry (@miss.kaylajo) stepped into the nail salon with her newborn baby girl Hendricks Hutton, she was hoping to get a *peaceful* powder dip manicure to celebrate her birthday. But baby Hendricks had other plans.

That's when a kind stranger sitting next to her saw she was struggling with her crying baby, and offered to hold her while she finished getting her nails done. The selfless stranger turned out to be Mackenzie Scott, former Miss Teen Arkansas.

Singleterry shared an emotional video on TikTok of Scott holding and bouncing baby Hendricks. "This sweet girl noticed I was overwhelmed at the nail salon and offered to hold baby girl so I could get my nails done," she wrote in the video's caption.

@miss.kaylajo

**just uploaded a video to update you all 💕** I hope you know what a rare gem you are @Kenzis979 Turns out she was Miss Arkansas Teen USA in 2023 👸🏼 #babygirl #fyp #singlemom #babytok #baby

Little did Scott know that her kind gesture was especially meaningful on that day in particular. "You may never know how much this means to me," she added. "What you didn't know is it was for my birthday and one of the first things I've gotten done for myself since I had her. I'm forever grateful for you! The world needs more of you!"

In the comment section, viewers shared kind words for both women.

"Sometimes our village is a complete stranger😭 I love this!!" one wrote.

Another added, "This is girlhood✨😍."

One more shared, "If she isn’t a mom already, she’ll be an amazing mom in the future (if she chooses to be). I love seeing women’s natural motherly instinct kick in. Such a beautiful thing. 🥹 What a blessing."

@miss.kaylajo

This is the village everyone talks about ✨👯‍♀️ We’re beyond grateful for all the love and support from you all! Our hope is that this one act of kindness inspires others to do the same. A simple “I’m happy to help if you need a minute” can mean the world—even if they say no. Let’s make 2025 the year we love each other OUT LOUD! ❤️ The world needs more @Kenzis979 so let’s create more! 💎 Something tells me you’ll be seeing a lot more of us! 💕 #actsofkindness #babygirl #nailsalon #thevillage #fyp

In an interview with PEOPLE, Singleterry shared more details about the interaction. "I had dip powder on my nails and was trying to hold Hendricks, but I was getting it all over her sweatshirt. I was literally sweating and on the verge of tears. I just wanted to go. But I already had the dip powder on my nails when Mackenzie walked over and offered to help," she said.

Scott also told the publication that once she picked up baby Hendricks, she immediately stopped crying. For the next 45 minutes, she held her. "I’ve always loved children and enjoy babysitting, so getting to see the baby smile while her mom enjoyed getting her nails done made me so happy," Scott said.

After her nails were done, she thanked Scott for her total act of kindness towards her. The two did not exchange contact information, but later that night Scott told PEOPLE that Singleterry had found her on social media and sent her a DM, asking for permission to share their story on TikTok.

@kenziescot

THANK YOU! @Kayla Jo #babygirl #fyp #thankful #babytok #baby #kindness #onesmallactofkindness #spreadlove

"I'm a single mom. The reason I brought her is I don't have any other help," Singleterry added. "Her dad's not around. My mom was with me, and other than that, I have no one. I was so overwhelmed. It didn’t hit me until I was just laying there. I was like, 'Some random person just allowed me to do something I haven’t been able to do for myself since I had her.' "

Since then, the two women have become friends. "I have been praying for this village," Singleterry shared. "Everybody talks about it takes a village. I stayed so strong throughout my entire pregnancy with Hendricks. She has a different dad than my older daughter. I've been praying for this village that people talk about or just to have her have some other support in her life. The other day I opened my Facebook messages and Mackenzie's mom had messaged me and said, 'We are here to be your village.' And I just broke down. Oh my God. I was just so grateful. I think I made some lifelong connections for sure."

via Rob Dance (used with permission).

CEO Rob Dance holds a list of things he's "sick" of hearing from his employees.

Since the COVID-19 pandemic disrupted workplaces worldwide, there has been a greater push for improved work-life balance and many companies are taking notice. The exciting thing is that when companies become more flexible, their employees become happier and more productive. It’s a win-win for all involved.

Rob Dance, the CEO of ROCK, a technology consulting company in the UK, recently went viral for posting about his approach to work-life balance on Instagram. What, at first, appeared to be a CEO reprimanding his employees revealed a boss who knows how to get the best out of his team by treating them like adults.

The post was of Dance holding a whiteboard that reads:

Things I’m sick of hearing from my employees:

- Can I leave early today

- I’ll be late in the morning

- My child is sick, can I rush off

- I’ve got a doctor’s appointment tomorrow, is that okay

- I’m going to be late back from lunch, I’ve got some things to sort.

I don’t care.

I hired you for a job and I fully TRUST you to get it done.

I don’t need you to account for every single hour.

Times have changed, and the workplace is different these days.

People are sick of being treated like children.

All that should matter is that everyone is happy, and that the work gets done.


He also shared his advice for companies on how to treat their employees. “Treat your staff like adults. That’s it, that’s the big secret,” he wrote. “Give them autonomy. Respect that they have lives outside of work. Don’t gaslight them into being grateful for not being fired every day.” Because in the end, the only thing that matters is if they get the job done. “Output should always trump hours,” he concluded.

Upworthy contacted Dance, who explained why managers still hesitate to treat their employees like adults.

“Many bosses don't trust their employees and keep extremely close tabs on them because of past experiences and a desire for control. They might believe that micromanaging ensures productivity and prevents issues,” he told Upworthy. “Additionally, the pressure to meet business targets can drive bosses to monitor employees obsessively, thinking it will lead to better outcomes. This approach, however, only undermines trust and destroys morale in the workplace. It creates a toxic environment where employees feel undervalued and stressed, leading to higher turnover rates and decreased overall performance. Instead of fostering a culture of accountability and growth, this behavior only promotes fear and resentment.”


Dance says that technology has helped drive demand for improved work-life balance.

“Mobile technology definitely started to blur the lines between one’s professional and personal life, making it tough to switch off from work,” he told Upworthy. “As a millennial leader, I've always valued work-life harmony for my staff, helping them to achieve both flexibility and finding purpose in their work.”

The ROCK CEO also has advice for employees who’d like to gain their employer’s trust.

“Always deliver quality work and aim to meet or exceed expectations. Keep communication lines open by regularly updating your manager on your progress, challenges, and successes,” he told Upworthy. “Take the initiative to go beyond basic requirements, showing your willingness to contribute more. Act with integrity by always being honest and ethical. Seek honest feedback and make tangible improvements based on it, demonstrating your commitment to growth. Finally, a big one is building positive relationships with everyone you work with, as strong connections are what help to build real trust.”

In April 2025, Dance shared some additional wisdom that highlights the power of leaders prioritizing culture. He took a photo of himself holding a whiteboard with some more wisdom that all CEOs should take to heart: "An employee who leaves for the salary might return for the culture, but if they leave because of the culture, no salary will ever bring them back."

It makes you wonder, if the money was right, which previous jobs would you go back to, and which ones would you reject?


rob dance, work-life balance, ROCK UK, bosess, pto, time off, employee complaintsCEO Rob Dance holds up a whipe board with his culture philosophy. www.linkedin.com


This article originally appeared last year.

A nurse holding a baby (left); Jars of beads (right)

Gen Zers are often made fun of for baring their hearts online and not having the same emotional compartmentalization skills as their predecessors, but as these folks enter the workplace, especially in the healthcare field, those qualities might be just what’s desperately needed.

Case and point: Jayuanna Thomas, a 25-year-old labor nurse who commemorates every birth she’s ever participated in with especially colored beads. So far, she has 211 beads in her baby bead jar.

She currently has 117 beads blue for boys, and 90 pink for girls. The there are eight yellow for the sweet babies who were “born sleeping” and are “just as important as blues and pinks." Next she has one purple, for the one time (so far) that she delivered a baby entirely alone, simply because things happened too fast. Finally, she has two green, for the “special” deliveries that touched Nurse Jay’s heart in a unique way that she’d never forget.

@jayuanna.lenee Here’s my baby jar! So thankful to be apart of so many special deliveries🥹🩵🩷💛💚 #babyjay #babybeadjar #laboranddelivery #laboranddeliverynurse #landdnurse ♬ Walking Around - Instrumental Version - Eldar Kedem

It's such a simple idea, and yet it really hit a powerful nerve among viewers, especially those with their own “yellow bead babies.”

“My daughter is someone’s yellow bead but she is forever my first pink bead.”

“As the mom of a baby born sleeping, 41 years ago, 3 weeks overdue, it was the nurse I remember all of these years. She was a bright light in a dark time.”

“My son was stillborn in 2018. The compassionate nurses really got me through it. Thank you for honoring the other stillborns. It means a lot.”

I wonder if my Angel baby is a bead in someone's jar.”

In an interview withNewsweek, Thomas shared that being an obstetrician-gynecologist (OBGYN) and delivering babies has been her dream since she was five years old.

"I never wanted to be anything else," she said. "One of my favorite parts of my job outside of being able to see life being brought into the world is sitting in my patients' rooms for HOURS getting to know them, their likes, dislikes, music preferences, what books they're reading etc."

Thomas’ deep emotional connection to her work is made all the more evident by her baby bead jar, which is not only heartwarming, but pretty revolutionary when you think about it. Our current healthcare system, among its many flaws, often focuses more on clinical care than compassionate care. Imagine if every hospital room had a similar baby bead jar, commemorating every birth for the sacred event that it is, regardless of the outcome?

labor nurse, nurse baby bead jar, baby bead jar, giving birth, nurses, healthcare, delivering babiesA pair of hands holding another pair of hands. Photo credit: Canva

Luckily, Thomas, and many nurses just like her, find their own unique ways of going against the system to humanly care in truly wonderful ways. Seems like Gen Z has a thing or two to teach us after all.

Homey D. Clown from "In Living Color."

Every generation and decade has its slang. These days, young people often use slang terms and phrases, such as “slay,” “no cap,” and “bet,” which can be hard to understand if you’re older than 25. But, of course, that’s the point. If you think these kids are unintelligible, what do you think would happen if you sent them back in time to 1992 and they had to figure out what Pauly Shore was saying in Encino Man?

Could a Gen Zer figure out what he meant when he said, “If you're edged 'cause I'm weazin' all your grindage, just chill"? Or would they know what Shore meant when he said, “The truth is, bro, life's about greasing the 'do back, buddy, and wheezin' on the buff-fest, man"? Probably not.


To help remind everyone that people in the ‘90s had their own bizarre slang, too, a Redditor named @NoahtheAttacker asked folks on the AskReddit subforum, “What’s the most ‘90s slang/phrase?” and reading the responses is like taking a time machine back to the era of Bill Clinton, neon-colored clothing, and In Living Color.

Here are 13 of the best responses, with our best attempt at explaining them to the older and younger generations.

1. "Not!"

For the uninitiated, this phrase was used to negate the sentence that came before. For example, President George Bush, who famously disliked broccoli, would say, "I love broccoli," then pause for two seconds, and say, "Not!" You must say "not" in a very obnoxious way. Or, in the song "Wayne's World Theme" from the Wayne's World soundtrack, Mike Myers and Dana Carvey sing, "The right to party is a battle we have fought / But we'll surrender and go Amish... Not!"

Here's Borat trying to understand the intricacies of the "Not" joke.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com



2. "Talk to the hand"

The complete line of this phrase is, "Talk to the hand because the face don't give a damn" and it was used in the '90s to aggressively turn down a request. For instance, if someone you didn't like asked you for a date, you would put your palm up in a stop position and say, "Talk to the hand," which means stop there; I'm not listening.

3. "All that and a bag of chips"

This phrase was used when referring to someone who excels at a specific activity, such as playing football or rapping. It's also used to refer to someone very attractive, as in the title of the 1999 film, She's All That, starring Rachel Leigh Cook. The "bag of chips" was added later to take things up a notch and make them even better, much like the addition of some Doritos on the side of your Subway sandwich.


4. "Mad"

Now, if you're a Gen Zer, you may think that adding the term "mad" to something means it's angry. On the contrary, to say someone is "mad hungry" means they are very hungry. If you are mad rich, then you are wealthier than Uncle Phil on The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. If you have "mad skills," that means that you excel at a specific task.

5. "As if"

"As if" is a shorter way of saying, "As if I would ever..." Here's an example: "You want me to choose those '80s Jordache jeans over these sweet Z Cavaricci pants? As if." Or, "You think that I would choose to date Tiffani Amber Thiessen over Pamela Anderson? As if." To take things up a notch, you could add a "whatever" after the "as if" to really drive the point home.


6. "Word"

"Word" is a simple way to confirm something someone else had said. "You like that new bar-b-que burger at Carl's Jr.?" you'd ask your friend, and they would respond with "Word," meaning "yes." To make it even more emphatic, say, "Word up!" or to be super affirmative, "Word to your mother!"

7. "Homey don’t play dat"

"Homey don't play dat" was the catchphrase of Herman Simpson, aka Homey D. Clown, a bitter and hostile convict with a never-ending community service sentence, on TV's sketch show, In Living Color. Whenever a child on the show would ask Homey to do something clownish, he would respond, "Homey Don't play dat," and then whop the kid over the head with a sock containing a tennis ball inside. Colloquially, it was used to turn down people's requests. For example, if someone asked if you could work late on your shift at Musicland, you could respond, "Homey don't play dat."

- YouTubewww.youtube.com


8. "Whatever"

"Whatever" is one of the most popular phrases of the '90s, and it perfectly encapsulates the Gen X mindset. It means, "I'm not impressed," "screw off," and "I don't care." It's a great way to blow someone off without having to provide a reason why.


- YouTubewww.youtube.com


9. "Tight!"

This is a great term that remains relevant today, referring to something truly exceptional. If you perfectly execute or agree with what someone is saying, you say "tight." For example, if someone asked you, "Hey! You want to get a Pizazz pizza at Taco Bell?" You'd respond with, "Tight." Or another use would be, "Did you see Arrested Development on Arsenio Hall last night? They were so tight."

- YouTubewww.youtube.com


10. Cowabunga, dude

"Cowabunga" is a 1960s surfer slang term that gained mainstream popularity in the 1990s after being popularized by Bart Simpson and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. It basically means, "that's great" or "go for it!"

11. "Extreme"

In the 1990s, extreme sports were huge, whether that meant bungee jumping or wing suiting off the top of a mountain. Therefore, anything that was particularly intense, whether it was soda with a fierce flavor or nachos that were loaded higher than usual, was called extreme. Vanilla Ice's debut album, featuring the song "Ice Ice Baby," was called To the Extreme.

12. Da bomb

If something is really incredible, it's "da bomb." For example, you'd say, "Ahhh man, the new chili cheese fries at 7-11 are da bomb." Additionally, to make things more fun, you could say they were "the bomb diggity."

13. "Psych!" or "Sike!"

This is similar to the "not!" joke referenced above. You call "psych" on something when you psyche someone out or fool them. For example, if your friend really liked a girl named Heather, you could say, "Heather was totally scamming on you at lunch today." Surprised you'd say, "really?" But then your buddy would pull the rug out from underneath you with a "Psych!" and everyone would laugh at you.