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Mom's adorable 1993 baby picture is a modern pediatrician's worst nightmare

Our parents were really doing their best with the information they had.

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Blanket, pillows, and toys in cribs used to be totally normal back in 1993.

I love learning about common parenting techniques from generations past. We've probably all heard some of the classics, like giving baby a tiny bit of alcohol to get him to sleep, or rubbing whiskey on sore gums to soothe a teething infant. (Upon reflection, it seems that a lot of parenting hacks back in the day boiled down to giving children liquor). These weren't hush-hush under the table tactics. Doctors frequently recommended these things to new parents. Now, of course, we're horrified at the thought and we know the significant risks of alcohol exposure both in the womb and out of it.

Crib set ups are similar. Decades ago, parents were hyper-worried about baby's limbs getting caught in the crib bars, so the solution was to line cribs with thick, soft bumpers. Inside the cribs, pillows and blankets kept baby comfortable and from rolling around too much. It made sense! At the time at least. But, wow, have times changed.

One mom is going viral for posting a fascinating side by side. Her as a baby in 1993, sleeping peacefully in a crib, versus her daughter in 2025.


babies, parenting, motherhood, fatherhood, pediatricians, newborn safety, SIDSThis was basically parenting in the 1960sGiphy

The comparison is definitely illuminating.

In 1993, there's millennial mom Alanna Clark, sleeping comfortably on her back in her pajamas. She's surrounded by a cocoon of comfort. The key thing to note is the fluffy crib bumpers to keep her from reaching through the bars. Bumpers were meant to add decoration and comfort to a baby's crib while also keeping them from getting injured by the bars. This was especially true back when drop-cribs, or cribs where one wall could drop down, were popular. The American Academy of Pediatrics officially began recommending parents never use crib bumpers in 2011 due to their being a suffocation risk highly associated with SIDS.

The photo of Clark's daughter from 2025 is striking. Her crib is completely empty! She's sleeping on her back with a fitted sheet on the mattress and a snugly-fitted sleepsack containing her legs. That's it. There are no bumpers, toys, pillows, or blankets according to the latest pediatrician guidelines.

As a bonus, Clark shared a picture of herself riding in a (rather flimsy looking) front-facing car seat while her daughter in 2025 rides in a rear-facing "tank," as she calls it, which fits current standards.

Clark's caption captured a beautiful sentiment about the "outdated" standards. Instead of judging her parents for dangerous choices, she understands that they were doing their absolute best with the information they had at the time:

"When I explained modern sleep practices to my dad, he explained to me that the bumpers were to keep me safe from breaking an arm or a leg. I’m glad that when my family talks about the 'new' way of doing things we focus on how much more information we have to keep babies safe. Anyways, enjoy these little snippets of me as a baby with my parents doing what they were told was best. I wonder what practices will be outdated when I’m a grandma one day"

See the fascinating photos here.


tiktok, babies, 1993, 2025 , parentingTikTok · Alanna | First Time Mom 🇨🇦www.tiktok.com

Clark's post went viral and commenters were so appreciative of how infant safety standards have improved. They were also grateful to previous generations for trying their best:

"yep, and hopefully our kids have even better info and technology when they raise their children."

"Doing their best back then, so we can keep doing better today!!"

"I love your take on this rather than bashing practices of the time which genuinely were what they thought was best"

"It's reassuring knowing that our kids will look at their baby pictures in the future like 'We're you trying to kill me?' and proceed to do differently, as will be best practice then"

"I was trying to explain to someone the other day that our kids are going to say they can’t believe our recommendations were legal it will have changed so much"

Others shared some of their favorite parenting methods from their own parents and grandparents. One commenter wrote that her grandma would put her babies in dresser drawers to keep them safe. Another said her grandpa "didn't believe" in car seats! Somehow, they both lived to tell the tale.

Are there things we're doing with our babies now that will one day be viewed as Hard Nos?


babies, parents, moms, dads, infants, newborns, safety, infant safety, parentingThis baby has nothing in his pack 'n play at all. Well done parents! Photo by Alex Bodini on Unsplash

Again, you have to remember that doctors, pediatricians, and fellow parents were all telling the older generations that this stuff was not just OK, but highly recommended. They really believed those death-trap crib bumpers were safe! You can't help but wonder what kinds of things parents today take for granted as safe, that our kids will look back on one day as reckless and dangerous when it's studied further.

"I'm 100% convinced that 'cry it out' will be the thing that future generations are appalled by," one commenter opined, referring to a controversial method of sleep training infants.

Another user joked that in a few decades, babies will sleep levitating in mid-air via magnets to avoid contact with potential hazards.

Me, I think it's likely that the next generation of parents will be appalled that they were ever allowed to watch cartoons or use a screen, as more research into screentime begins to take shape. I also wouldn't be surprised if pediatricians decide we can't be trusted to make our own baby food at home anymore. But these are just guesses. We won't really know until the science rolls in.

Overall, there's a powerful message here for parents and even those grandparents who might insist on being defensive about the older ways:

"What some grandparents don’t understand is that following modern standards is NOT a condemnation of their parenting," one commenter wrote. "They did what was best according to contemporary standards too." That's all any of us can do.

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Mom has harsh reality check for people who want to see fewer 'iPad kids'

Fine, no more screens! But you're not gonna like the alternative.

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Should parents use iPads to help kids stay quiet at restaurants?

You can't walk into any family restaurant these days without seeing it: families happily chowing down on their meals while the youngest kids (and sometimes the older ones, too) watch shows on iPads or play games on a phone. Yes, we are living in the generation of the iPad kid, and people have thoughts.

Yes, the criticism of modern parents comes fast and strong. Accusations that "parents don't parent anymore," and that they're lazy and happy to rot their kids' brain are thrown around easily. We've seen the data that too much screentime can be incredibly harmful for kids and young people, leading to sleep problems, bad behavior, poor academic performance, and more. So, there's definitely a growing movement that urges those parents at restaurants: Get those kids off the iPad!

One mom is going viral for her opinion: If we want to see fewer iPad kids, we have to be more accommodating of annoying kid behaviors.

kids, ipads, screen time, restaurants, parentingiPads help entertain kids and also give parents a needed breather. But there is a such thing as too much. Photo by Patricia Prudente on Unsplash

"If you all want to see fewer iPad babies, you are going to have to increase your tolerance for childish nonsense outside in the world, okay?" says mom Jordan Simone in a TikTok video. "If you don't want to see little kids, toddlers, on their iPads at dinner, you're going to have to accept the fact that for a while, they're going to be loud, obnoxious, even disruptive to what you at a separate table are up to."

The oft-quoted line goes something like this: Kids should learn how to behave in public! Simone has thoughts on that one, too:

"Kids can't learn how to behave in public unless they're in public getting those experiences. And that learning curve is going to be inconvenient and uncomfortable for you."

So, she's saying in a culture that absolutely loves to complain about the presence of children almost everywhere, asking parents to put the iPads away means restaurants, planes, movie theaters, and other public spaces are going to have to get a lot more annoying. Watch the whole rant here:

@jordxn.simone

the way yall act people either give their kids screens or start putting their hands on them, and frankly myself and others like the first option more. #kid #toddler #toddlers #ipad #restaurant

Interestingly, the reaction to the video was not overwhelming agreement...even from parents.

I thought this take would be a slam dunk with exhausted parents who are tired of the criticism. But some people chimed in and took issue:

"The problem is parents ARENT teaching their kids how to behave in public. It’s a default to hand them a screen before putting in any actual effort."

"Idk the teacher has 20 of them and they deal with them screaming. Interact with your kid instead of expecting them to entertain themselves at the table."

"My mom’s strategy when we were kids is if we started misbehaving we got a warning, if we didn’t start then we got taken outside until we were able to calm down. So actions and consequences!"

"parents should accept that they will need to constantly be engaged & interacting w/their kids. your life of ease ended when you decided on parenthood. they are now the priority, not your convenience"

But overall, parents appreciated Simone calling out the catch-22:


leave it to beaver, family, parenting, kids, dinnerIs it possible we're all romanticizing how well-behaved we were as kids?Giphy

"Also, a kid on a screen somewhere doesn't mean they're on it all the time. My kid is autistic, she has a hard time at restaurants with the sights, smells, and sounds, the tablet helps her focus."

"Literally the reason people hand iPads and their phones to their kids is to distract them and keep them quiet. Because people complain about kids being kids in public spaces"

"Yall want community so bad but guess what? Community includes children."

"Adults don’t know how to act in public, but they expect children to"

"People forget they go to family friendly restaurants and expect private dining experience"

Experts say it's developmentally appropriate for young children to have trouble sitting still for a whole meal. If you have a very well-behaved two-year-old, you might be able to hope for about 20 minutes. If your kid is especially hyperactive, it'll be less than that. Table service at a restaurant takes much, much longer than 20 minutes. Sometimes you can stretch that 20 minutes if you're really creative and engaging, well-prepared with coloring books and activity books and games. But it takes a ton of work, ruins your ability to enjoy your own meal, and still might not buy you enough time. Even worse, even six-year-olds might struggle to stay seated at a table for more than 35 minutes or so! That could mean you're dealing with this issue for years and years and years.

I've always thought a good compromise is to save the screen for the actual eating part of the meal. My youngest has ADHD and is an absolute disaster trying to sit at the table, so we'll usually pull out our whole bag of tricks including activities, games, or even walking around the restaurant until the food has arrived. This is her chance to learn how to behave in a public space. When the food comes, that's when she usually gets the screen so she'll actually eat, and we can enjoy our own food—but we always reserve the right to bring out the screen earlier if she's really bouncing off the walls.

And even as a parent, I can completely agree that kids don't belong everywhere. I've had enough babies crying through bloody R-rated horror movies at 10pm. Toddlers don't usually need to go to fancy steakhouses or romantic inns. And I can also agree that using screens as an easy default instead of helping kids learn how to behave in public is the wrong move in the longterm. But I've also gotten dirty looks when my child is throwing a tantrum and I've felt the discomfort in the air when my kids are being too loud in public. Unfortunately we can't have it both ways.

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Three simple things you can say to stop a 'rude' kid's attitude, according to a psychologist

These three lines can "immediately set you on the path for a positive interaction."

Photo credit: Canva

A child throwing a temper tantrum.

At some point, every parent has to deal with a child who talks back and makes rude comments. It’s a normal part of growing up. But it’s a parent's job to stop it before it becomes an everyday behavior and an ingrained part of their personality.

Stopping rude behavior can be especially difficult for parents because it's easy to get upset and escalate the situation when their children talk back or act rudely.

The good news is that Dr. Becky is around to show us how to handle these situations like an adult. Dr. Becky Kennedy is a popular social media clinical psychologist who founded “Good Inside,” a program that helps support parents and children through every developmental phase.

Dr. Becky shared 3 lines parents can use to respond to rudeness and talking back. “These will help you de-escalate the situation and immediately set you on the path for a positive interaction with your kid,” she says at the start of her video.

Line 1: “I hear you, and you must be really upset to say something like that to me.”

Line 2: “Look, all I’m saying is I know you’re a good kid, even when you say some not so good things.”

Line 3: “I know there’s another way you can say that to me. Do you want to try again?”

At first, a lot of folks may think that Dr. Becky is asking us to be too permissive of a kid who mouths off. But she has another perspective. “Now, I know what you might be thinking: ‘Am I just kind of permitting this rudeness?'” she says. “No! You are acting like an adult.” She says the key is avoiding being pulled into a power struggle or escalation of rudeness.

“You are not being pulled into a power struggle or rudeness escalation. Yes, it might feel good in the moment to say something like, ‘You can’t talk to me like that, you’re so disrespectful, no iPad tonight!’ But we know if we give rudeness back to our kid, they are just going to give more rudeness back to us. That is so ineffective and we have to be the adult. So try one of those lines and let me know how it goes,” Dr. Becky said.

The key question for parents to consider in this situation is: Am I reacting or responding to my child’s behavior? Dr. Becky believes we should respond to the situation calmly and redirect the child’s behavior.

One commenter put Dr. Becky’s advice into action and had a great result.

“This absolutely works! My son said something awful to me the other morning while getting ready for school. I thought of you , took a deep breath, and said, ‘Wow, you must be really upset to have said that to me’ and he just nodded and said, ‘I am.’ We hugged, he even apologized and we connected,” A commenter wrote.

A fellow therapist, Dr. Claudia Luiz, explained the psychological concept behind Dr. Becky’s advice a bit further.

“This is what psychoanalysis calls ‘fusion.’ When the bad is fused with good, it neutralizes toxic interactions. Fusion is hard to achieve. Negative feels eclipse the living, positive ones, leading to ‘rudeness.’ To get more ‘fused’ you start by processing your impatience with your own negative feelings. You can learn to appreciate why it’s hard to dislike and feel angry at your children with fusion to feel less intense or disregulated. With fusion, you can be more chill,” Dr. Luiz wrote.

rude kids, dr becky, raising goods kids, kid acting out, gentle parenting, parenting tipsA kid sticking their tongue outPhoto credit: Canva

Dr. Becky’s advice is valuable because most parents would have a knee-jerk reaction to their child being rude and attempt to punish them or correct them in a harsh manner. However, Dr. Becky says that it’s best to diffuse the situation instead and that will make it less likely for the child to be rude because they aren’t getting the response they want. But what they are getting is something more, a chance to connect with a parent and an open, safe space to share their feelings without having to mask them in hostility.

Similarly, Dr. Becky has advised parents against putting too much energy into "fixing" things for their kids, saying "it's not our job to make kids happy." Instead, she suggests to essentially hold space for whatever discomfort or frustration the child is experiencing in the moment. This could mean literally sitting next to them, and offering them reassuring words like "I'm so glad you're talking to me about this/ I believe you/tell me more." And then, the hard part—not doing anything else.

Raising emotionally resilient kids isn't always the easiest thing, but it's so important for living a healthy adulthood. And often, as Dr. Becky's tips illustrate, a lot of it comes down with being able to "tolerate distress" ourselves as parents. Find even more expert-backed suggestions on how to do that by following Dr. Becky on Instagram.

This article originally appeared last year.

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Mom dissects one of the little "piles" around her house and her rant is so relatable

All parents will recognize the mental exhaustion brought on by these innocuous piles of junk.

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Piles of junk are driving one mom bonkers.

Running a household, especially with little kids running around, involves a lot of stuff. The kids have stuff, they bring stuff home from school, the grandparents give you stuff, other parents pass along stuff they don't need anymore. And of course, you've got your own stuff! That's to say nothing of the daily mail, which is a good 90% junk.

Where does it all go? Well, it either gets put away in the proper place, thrown away, or donated. But that doesn't always happen right away. First, the junk has to build and accumulate to the point where it annoys you and you're motivated to do something about it.

A mom is going viral for perfectly explaining the bane of her existence: All the "little piles" of junk.


Piles are usually at least 50% junk mail. Photo by Alexander Grey on Unsplash

The natural form of junk is piles. As it accumulates, the piles will begin to form all over your house. The piles especially like the kitchen counter and the stairs.

"Here's what the single hardest thing for me is about being a mom," mom and Instagrammer Bekah Martinez begins in a video. "There's these little piles that accumulate. Mini piles. And I’m the only one who acknowledges these piles. These piles require so much mental energy all the time. Because there’s so many little decisions attached to every little item.”

In the video, she approaches a piano in her living room. Of course, because she's a mom and the piano's top offers a flat surface, there is a pile of random stuff on top. For our entertainment, she dissects and explains each individual item.

There's:

  • A lightbulb
  • A pacifier clip
  • A Shrinky Dink parrot
  • A small black plastic piece that broke off of something
  • A Sharpie

Martinez explains that she can't just throw all the stuff away, or even put it away! The lightbulb is a rechargeable lightbulb with a charger that needs to be tracked down. Her son has aged out of the pacifier clip and throwing it away seems wasteful but donating it is another chore to do. The Shrinky Dink was a gift and it will feel bad to throw it away but no one really wants it. That mysterious little black plastic thing might be needed at some point if she can ever figure out what it's from.

"No one else in this family at this point in our lives is going to do anything with these little piles," she says, getting more and more hilariously worked up, as if the piles have broken her very spirit. Watch the relatable and entertaining reel here:

Parents everywhere — especially moms — felt so seen by Martinez's rant.

Parents and non-parents alike know all about the piles. Parents just have the added bonus of their kids finding things in the street, collecting worthless plastic Happy Meal toys, and bringing six-dozen pieces of artwork home from school every week. It all goes into the piles.

Commenters had a lot to say about it.

"I have two full draws of 'little piles' that I didn't have the mental energy for"

"[Piles cause] 90% of my overstimulation"

"This is single-handedly the most relatable reel I've ever seen"

"Death by a thousand little piles"

"I've been a parent for 12 years and this is the best video I've ever seen which explains it"


simpsons, junk, clutter, house cleaning tips, organization tipsJunk drawer, anyone?Giphy

Some people had productive tips for dealing with all the junk:

"Get a basket and throw every little pile in it. If you don’t go to the basket to look for something within a month, you don’t need it so throw it away or donate!"

"I'm a professional organizer! ... Create 3 baskets that live in an area that you can ignored for a while. 1. Needs home (think the light bulb) 2. Donate (think the pacifier clip) 3. Memories (think the shrinky dink) ... Then, once a week, or at a cadence of your choice, revisit the baskets and take a solid 20min-hour creating a more permanent home or getting rid of those items!"

Others were in favor of getting revenge on all the people in the house that don't help clean up:

"I like putting the little piles on the stairs so I can watch the people, to whom they belong, walk by them on the stairs on their way to bed."

The greater point of Martinez's rant, besides the fact that the piles are annoying, was that it too often falls on one person in the house (ahem, you can probably guess who) to deal with them. The piles are invisible to everyone else, she claims, including her partner. It seems silly to complain about a light bulb and a Sharpie, but she's right: Dealing with the piles is far too big a mental load for one person to take on.

Some people get so overwhelmed by it all that they create "doom piles," which are especially common in people with ADHD. It's like a giant super pile, where you take all the junk and put it together in one place. It makes things look more tidy outside of that one area, but it creates a major headache for future-you. Experts say the best way to attack the piles is to do it in small chunks so you don't get overwhelmed, and ideally offer yourself a small reward for your efforts. A great way to approach it is to work on separating the piles into trash, put away, and donate for 10 minutes before you watch TV at night!

Oh, and partners who supposedly "don't notice the piles" (you know who you are), let's get off the couch and into the game. Go team!

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