motherhood

We might be prone to overdoing it on the nostalgia sometimes, but it's often for good reason. "The good old days" may be a tired cliche, but that doesn't mean the phrase doesn't hold a kernel of truth. Some things really used to be better. Different isn't always just different, and it's definitely not always better. Sometimes different is objectively worse!

Take a "simple" theme park vacation with your family and kids, for example. In the 1990s, you could go to Disneyland or The Magic Kingdom relatively on a whim, show up at the park, wait in line to get a ticket, grab a map, walk in, and have a good time. However, these days, things are a lot more complicated. In 2025, the price of the park changes with demand, and you have to make reservations for the day you hope to visit. Want to eat dinner at a sit-down restaurant? Better reserve your table a few days (or even weeks) ahead of time. Want to get on the newest ride? Better hop in the virtual queue when the park opens at 9 am, and that's assuming you remembered to book and pay for enough Lightning Lane passes.

Further, the entire time you’re at the park, you’re staring at your phone, following instructions on where to go based on the app. And there aren’t any days when the park isn’t crowded—it’s always crowded. It’s a wonder people have any fun at the park when things are so complicated and expensive. Planning the trip is a months-long equivalent of a part-time job for many parents, and being in the parks is a grueling rat-race. Fun, yes, but absolutely exhausting!

Why is it so hard to be a parent in 2025?

Sarah Biggers-Stewart, founder of CLOVE + HALLOW, a clean cosmetics line, believes the stress of going to Disney mirrors what everything is like for parents in 2025. “The hardest thing about parenting in 2025 is that the parenting part isn't really that hard. It's everything else,” she said in a post with over 70,000 views. “The amount of participation and engagement expected of parents in literally everything related to raising kids is insane.”

Warning: Strong language.

“And nothing perfectly illustrates this better than this Disney trip we're going on next week and the multi-month booking process I've had to go through in order to make sure that we can have a normal Disney trip. Sixty days ago, I had to pre-book at six am, restaurants, activities,” she continued.

Indeed, many Disney experiences open for booking at odd hours long before the actual dates of your trip, like first thing in the morning or even at midnight months beforehand. If it seems crazy to you that you'd have to wake up in the middle of the night to book a meeting with your kid's favorite cartoon princess or risk disappointing them when all the spots are booked up, you're not the only one.

Biggers-Stewart adds that it makes her mad because "it doesn't have to be this way.”

Another mom on TikTok agreed: Kel, who says she's a huge Disney fan, concurs that the process has gotten way out of hand; not just at Disney, but at most theme parks. Another mom went viral recently after complaining that her trip to Disney World was miserable because she spent the whole day managing logistics on her phone.

Biggers-Stewart says the same thing is happening in children’s sports.

“We're treating these seven-year-olds like they're all gonna go pro. They can't even go with their families for a week vacation during the summer break because if they miss a week, they're like shunned and benched,” she told her 602,000 followers. "The seven-year-olds are talking about their protein intake, and the parents are being lectured by the coaches about their protein intake. These kids are seven.”

And it goes beyond sports! Want to take your kids to a free storytime at the library? Better hope you remembered to reserve a spot three months ago. And speaking of which, better remember to block your work calendar for the parties your child's daycare throws every week in the middle of the day, which parents are "strongly encouraged" to attend. If your kids are old enough to walk and bike around themselves, well, you'd better be sure you accompany them every step of the way or you might get arrested — seriously.

Many moms in the comments could totally relate to Biggers-Stewart’s frustration.

There used to be a time when you could go to Disney spontaneously. Photo by Perry Merrity II on Unsplash

"The 1st time we did Disney, I did nothing, and it was a nightmare. The 2nd time, I had spreadsheets & binder & it was F-ing magical for my family and satisfied me like I had planned a corporate summit," Booishlady wrote. "I was SWEATING BULLETS trying to get my kid into various summer camps the moment registration opened in JANUARY. And you're right, even basic activities have to be planned and purchased way in advance."

Anastasia agreed, writing "Having to meticulously plan summer camps in January or else there’s no childcare options available."

Another user wrote, "I saw something that said working moms now spend more time with their kids than SAHMs in the 70s." Unbelievably, this is true, despite the nearly impossible math.

"We decided early on that we weren’t going to overbook our kids with a bunch of extracurriculars. We prioritize family time, which is great, and yet I still feel so much external pressure to do more," Katie wrote.

It's hard to believe now, but there was once a time when a family could visit a theme park like Disney World with very little planning. Arrange travel, buy tickets, walk in and enjoy. But those days are long gone. And it represents a growing theme in our culture.

At the conclusion of her video, Biggers-Stewart boiled the problem down to what parenting is like in 2025: Intense. “Everything is the most intense version that requires the most effort and participation,” she said. “That is why parents in 2025 are burnt the f**k out.”

She has since built a large following on social media offering tips and encouragement to other busy, working moms.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.