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Mom's plan to name her baby after Vaseline goes viral in the worst way. Then her family intervened.

“This is true abuse."

Photo credit: Canva

How do parents come up with these??

You would think the line between creative and absolute cringey baby names would be distinct enough for any person to tell the difference, but time and time again we have seen that is not the case.

Even when laws are put in place to protect future kiddos from being on the receiving end of incredibly questionable moniker choices, there will always be some that slip through the cracks.

Luckily…this is a bit of a near miss baby name story. Sort of.

Over on the infamous tragedeigh Subreddit, home to all sorts of crazy baby name conversations, someone shared how their cousin, a mom-to-be, had originally planned for their unborn child to be named Serena, but told them via text that she instead wanted to go with something “more elegant.”

one of my older cousins sent this to me…im sorry but Vaselinea??
byu/__misaki__ intragedeigh

The “more elegant” name in question? Vaselinea. Pronounced “vah-suh-lee-nia” because mom wanted a “nia” sound at the end.

“Im sorry, what? “Like this thing?” the OP responded, along with a picture of Vaseline petroleum jelly.

Understandably, the cousin rushed online to get tips on how to convince her to “go back to choosing the name Serena.”

Folks in the comments were (obviously) unanimously on the OP’s side…and many gave a quick, slightly NSFW glimpse into baby Vasalinea’s future should the name stick…

“High school is gonna be real rough lol.”

“The only place you should have difficulty choosing between Vaseline and Nivea is in your shopping basket. Not your child’s name. Yikes!”

“Vaselinea sounds like dollar store brand Vaseline.”

“Remind her what Vaseline is used for by many, many men and then remind her that her child will be surrounded by teenage boys at some point in their life.”

“This is true abuse. Naming a child a lubricant??? What is wrong with people?”

“At least she’s lubed up for all the bullying she will encounter thanks to her mom.”

“Honestly, this Subreddit continues to reinforce my belief that a decent percentage of the population should not reproduce, not until they gain some wisdom at least. If this is what you are considering naming your child, you have no business having one.”

It would be interesting to know whether this soon-to-be mom is a Gen Zer, since their relationship with the product is a little more deeply ingrained than other generations. Thanks to the “slugging” craze brought on by many Gen Z skincare influencers, the product is a beauty mainstay. But still…to name a child after it…that’s a bit much.

Thankfully, in an update the OP revealed that they had been able to talk some sense into their cousin. Although, rather than going back to Serena, the mom will be going with Sorelle, which she explained was "Italian for ‘sisters.’”

update on “Vaselinea”, what do u guys think?
byu/__misaki__ intragedeigh

Although she would also be pronouncing it “Suh-rell,” wish is…not the way the name should be pronounced?

  - YouTube  www.youtube.com  

But hey, we’ll take what we can get at this point.

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Grandma lists 3 questions grandparents should ask before offering parenting advice

Think of all the drama this could prevent.

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Unsolicited advice rarely works in any circumstance.

Sure, parents who have the additional “village” support of grandparents are fortunate in many ways. But often that help comes with the headache of having to deal with an endless supply of advice they didn’t ask for. Even though these tidbits are given with good intentions, they can create more problems than they solve.

To avoid these potential conflicts, DeeDee Moore, a grandma who runs the TikTok account @morethangrand, suggests that grandparents “pause” and ask themselves three simple questions before doling out any guidance.

Question 1: “Was I asked for this input?”

grandparents, grandparent advice, parenting advice, unsolicited advice, kids, raising kids, in-laws, babiesA grandma in colorful clothes. Photo credit: Canva

“If parents haven’t specifically asked for your opinion they may not be open to receiving it,” says Moore. “No matter how valuable you think it is.”

There can be a bajillion reasons why parents aren’t open to advice—maybe it’s simply the timing of it all, maybe they gravitate towards newer techniques, or maybe they just want to figure it out for themselves. Either way, those boundaries need to be respected. Otherwise the advice, however accurate and sound, usually falls on deaf ears anyway, wasting everyone's time.

Question 2: “Is this about safety or preference?”

grandparents, grandparent advice, parenting advice, unsolicited advice, kids, raising kids, in-laws, babiesA grandma smiling with her granddaughter.Photo credit: Canva

“Safety concerns might warrant speaking up. But preferences like how they dress the baby or which foods they introduce first are their domain,” Moore says.

Safety concerns might include pertinent news one might have stumbled upon, such as food or toy recalls. But other instances, like how babies are dressed or what foods they eat, fall under preferences, and therefore don’t really need to be brought up, especially if not asked.

Question 3: “What’s my real motivation?”

grandparents, grandparent advice, parenting advice, unsolicited advice, kids, raising kids, in-laws, babiesA grandma smiling with a hat onPhoto credit: Canva

“Be honest with yourself: are you trying to be helpful or are you trying to show your expertise or even assert control?”

It might not be easy to have this kind of soul searching (no one wants to think of themselves as manipulative or controlling) but it really is crucial for anyone trying to live a little more intentionally, not just grandparents.

Moore concludes by affirming that “knowing when and how to give advice can transform your relationship with your adult children and helps you become the supportive grandparent they need.” After all, it’s all about providing support, not further stress.

 
 @morethangrand Advice from grandparents can be helpful--but only if it's useful and wanted. Save this for next time you are tempted to give advice to new parents, and see if it passes these three tests. Often, the best way to help parents is to let them figure it out on their own. Want more suggestions about how to truly support new parents? Sign up for our emails to get weekly tips, inspiration, and links to resources for supportive, involved grandparents. Follow the link in my profile to sign up now! #grandparents #grandparent #CommunicationTips #GrandparentsLove #AdultChildren #NewGrandparent #newgrandparents #newgrandma #Grandparenting #grannytok #HealthyBoundaries #Boomer #EffectiveCommunication #GentleGrandparenting ♬ original sound - MoreThanGrand 
 
 


As for parents currently dealing with unwanted advice, polite but firm boundary setting is usually best (if you can’t just laugh it off and move on, ideally). This might include acknowledging and validating their intentions or concerns, perhaps even sharing a bit of appreciation, then communicating your preferences. For example, "Thank you for your input, but I would really like to handle this on my own.” Obviously it’s not a strategy that will have a 100% success rate, but it’s certainly healthier than most alternatives.

When you think about how passed down, word-of-mouth advice was essentially the only way our grandparents learned about parenting, it makes sense that they would be naturally inclined to follow that tradition. But parents have so much access to information now, be it through books, online forums and classes, and yes, even TikTok (not vouching for its credibility, just saying it exists). It doesn’t make a grandparent's insight any less valuable, but it does mean that a little adaptability is needed.

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Mom of identical twins joked about mixing them up. Then real twin mix-up stories poured in.

Apparently, this is not a terribly uncommon occurrence with identical twin babies.

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It's entirely possible for parents to mix up identical twins.

Having twins is unarguably a wild ride straight from the get go, but having identical twins is a whole other layer of fun. Two babies at once who look exactly alike right down to their little DNA strands and who share a bond like no other on Earth? It's an adventure for sure.

People like to joke about mixing up identical twins, and twins themselves will often play practical jokes swapping identities on people who can't tell them apart. But what happens if a parent literally loses track and doesn't know which baby is which? Does that actually happen? And what do they do if it does?

A video from @thetwinniesmom shows her twin babies dressed in identical "BEST BUDS" shirts with the text, "They don't know it yet but in 30 minutes I will be taking them to the hospital because I mixed them up." It got nearly 9 million views and thousands of comments.

@thetwinniesmom

#identical #twins #babies #brothers #parenting #hospital #birth #birthstories #pregnant #delivering #funny #comedy #silly #satire #baby #mom

The post was hash tagged as satire and comedy, but judging by the comments that poured in, mixing up identical twin babies is a real thing that can happen, and more easily than you might think. As one commenter wrote, "Do I have twins? Nope! Did this unlock a new fear? Yep!"

People's personal stories of twin baby mix-ups show how it happens:

"My identical twins bracelets fell off beside one another at about a week old...I made a good guess...lol. Twin A may now be twin B."

"My mother left my father home alone with my twin sister and I once when we were infants. He took off our bracelets to bath us. My mother came home during the bathing process, took one look at the bracelets and asked if he knew which twin was which. Look of horror, and then a stab in the dark. So, I might not have the name I was given at birth."

identical twins, babies, twin mix-up, twin swap, parenting, newborn babies Newborn babies have bracelets with their identity on them, but once those come off parents are on their own.Photo credit: Canva

"My father's baby book says that he was born first, and that he was the heavier twin. He and his twin brother were looking at it one day and my grandmother remarked that that couldn't be right -- she remembered the doctor being surprised because the heavier one was second. Those two have been mixed up since day 1."

"This actually happened to a pair of twins I know, they only found out around age 17 because of an invisible physical variation (I cannot remember what it was, but it occurred to the second twin during birth, torn something or other) that supposedly belonged to X that belonged to Y. The names switched between the hospital and home."

"I have a friend with identicals. She kept nail polish on one's big toes to tell them apart. To her dismay, at 2 months old, the nail polish wore off before she could reapply. They are older now and have extremely different personalities. But she took a leap of faith and called one A and the other B though she wasn't sure. Still not sure, lol."

"I once fed the same twin twice.🤣 They were a few days old. 😬🥰"

identical twins, babies, twin mix-up, twin swap, parenting, newborn twinsFeeding the same newborn twin twice? It happens.Photo credit: Canva

Some twins shared that they may have been switched without knowing.

"I'm a twin who was supposedly born having seizures for days. I am now 'fine,' while my sister gets seizures, severe migraines and has two autoimmune disorders. Forever wondering if we got switched. Our drs insist I just grew out of it 😭 They SWEAR our bloodwork matches up."

"Identical twins here 🤣 I always liked my sisters name better. Maybe it was mine first. 🤔"

"My twin and I were raised by hippies. I’m pretty sure they have no clue to this day who’s who."

"My mom used to say that only my older sister could definitively tell my brother & I apart as babies when both she and my dad struggled. My sister is only 18 months older than us, so I suspect the validity of this, and that she may have just been randomly picking and may parents took her judgement as truth."

identical twins, babies, twin mix-up, twin swap, parentingbaby twins GIFGiphy

It's actually totally understandable that parents would mix up twins. Parental instincts can only go so far, and when you're trying to manage life with two infants at once, phew. But people did share methods for trying to keep them straight:

"I always wonder if I mixed up my twins they look different now, but when they were little, they looked identical I didn’t take their hospital bracelets off for like a month because I was so scared, I was gonna mix them up."

"I painted one of my twins’ big toenail green because his name is Seth and i could remind myself Seth Green, like the actor. This worked until they both ended up being transported to the hospital in an ambulance without me and by the time I got there, the polish was removed for a pulse ox monitor. I worried for months that they had been mixed up, but finally spotted the tiniest fleck of green on Seth’s toenail as it grew out. 😅"

"My mirror image identical twins were 6 ounces apart, I had to weigh them to see which was who lol."

identical twins, babies, twin mix-up, twin swap, parentingIt's not easy to tell identical twins apart if they don't have any distinct natural markings.Photo credit: Canva

"I saw someone say they put temporary tattoos on one baby."

"My husband is a twin. His mother put a dot of nail polish on his twin’s big toe nail until they were like 4. lol"

"Simple trick : get a fingerprint reader, could be an old iPhone for example. Register the fingerprints of only one of the twins. In case of doubt, scan both of them, the one who unlocks the iPhone is the good one (the other one is the evil twin of course)."

""If I had twins they’d definitely wear specific color wristbands until I could finally figure out which is which.""

"I’d mix them up and just start using their names interchangeably until they were old enough to tell me."

identical twins, babies, twin mix-up, twin swap, parentingIdentical sneezesGiphy by America's Funniest Home Videos

And really, at the end of the day. does it really matter if they get switched around as infants? Barring any known health issues, it's really just a name.

"I'm an identical twin. If our parents ever mixed us up and we've lived our whole life as the wrong one, it's no big deal. 😁"

"I’m a twin and this is what I’ve always said! 😂 It doesn’t change who you are if you were mixed up at some point, just your name lol."

"I asked a friend of mine how she could tell her twins apart when they were a few weeks old. She said she couldn’t a lot of the time and just figured whatever name they had when she could tell them apart would stick. I strive for that level of laid back."

Seriously, having twins is such a wild ride.

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Mom sparks debate when she says she no longer brings snacks and water when out with her 3-year-old

The teachers loved the idea. Not all the parents were convinced.

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A mom went viral for explaining why she won't bring snacks and water on short outings with her 3-year-old

It's a struggle all parents run into eventually. It becomes too much, and far too annoying, to be responsible for every aspect of your children's lives and well-being. At some point, they need to start taking ownership over the things that are important to them. When they hit the age where they begin to really care about what they wear? They better be involved in doing their own laundry! Got soccer practice? Better remember to get dressed and pack your bag before it's time to go.

Mom and dad can't be the only ones keeping everyone on track 24/7. But, of course, this is a battle that's fought both in our homes and in American culture at large. Kids are less independent now than the were in previous generations. Fewer kids walk to school or play outside unsupervised. And some say that it shows.

One mom is using a "harsh" parenting technique to instill this kind of independence in her kids from an early age.


moms, mothers, parenting, kids, toddlers, babies, consequences, punishment, psychologySome argue that kids need tough love from an early age to learn independence and responsibility. Photo by Gabe Pierce on Unsplash

Chelsea, a professor and homesteader, recently took to TikTok to share some words of wisdom that have helped her in raising her 1- and 3-year-olds without collapsing from constant overwhelm.

"I don't know who needs to hear this but if you have little kids, you have to try one of my favorite recent parenting techniques," she says in the selfie-style video. "This might sound a little crazy or a little crude, but i promise if you listen, I will explain how this has added so much value."

She begins by offering an example of a scenario most parents can relate to.

"The other day we were driving in the car and from the backseat [my 3-year-old] calls 'Mom, I'm hungry!' My response to her when she said she was hungry was 'Oh, did you bring a snack?'"

The essence of Chelsea's independence technique is that she no longer brings snacks, water, or entertainment like books and games on short trips out with her kids. Instead, she pushes them to remember to bring what they need.

"I know, this sounds a little harsh. I promise, I'm not letting them go hungry, I'm not letting them go thirsty," Chelsea says. "They are very hydrated, well fed kids. This is used in very specific scenarios. But what this does is it puts a little bit of the responsibility and the ownership on them."

"Number one, it helps her understand that she has to take some responsibility in bringing something [she needs.]" Though, the mom of two adds that she helps remind her daughter before they leave the house to make sure she has everything she needs.

"I'm helping her prepare, but i'm also teaching her a little bit of a natural consequence. Because if she doesn't bring her water or her snack, then her natural consequence is she doesn't get snack."

After using this technique for a while, Chelsea notices that her daughter will remember on her own far more often. And if she does forget, mom's often got her back. Chelsea states that if her daughter forgets her water and mom just so happens to have one for her, her daughter is incredibly grateful and appreciative. I think all parents would like more of that sentiment from their kids!

Watch the whole clip here:

@sunny_acres_regen_farm

My small contribution to making the next generation less entitled #mom #toddlermom #toddlers #parenting #homestead

The video racked up over 400,000 views and left parents, teachers, and other commenters extremely divided.

Some loved the idea. Teachers, especially, were keen on the idea of kids coming into their classrooms having learned more responsibility and independence at home from a young age:

"I’m a teacher and this will help your children so much. A lot of kids don’t know how to solve problems or take responsibility"

"I’m a kindergarten teacher and I approve this message"

"As a teacher, thank you. I can tell asap when a child had never been responsible for a single thing in their life. Then they get to kinder and are lost bc someone has always done everything for them"

Teachers have a great perspective because they see and work closely with so many kids. They're really plugged in to bigger trends and concerns that affect the entire age group and not just one single kid or family. So when they say kids need to learn more independence early, it's usually a good idea to listen.

Some commenters chimed in that they, themselves, were raised this way, or had used similar approaches successfully with their own kids:

"Seriously, I don’t remember being offered snacks and drinks constantly or having them always around anywhere all the time. If we were out and about a lot of times I had to wait (within reason)"

"I did this with my now adult children. My youngest (18) is constantly shocked by his friends who aren’t like him and his siblings."

Some people, however, had concerns with whether this technique was age-appropriate for a toddler:


moms, mothers, parenting, kids, toddlers, babies, consequences, punishment, psychologyIt can be tough for toddlers to think ahead about the future consequences of their behavior.Giphy

"my boomer mom said things like this and it created a lot of anxiety that I had to remember to take care of myself and I felt abandoned"

"I dont like this at all! Why should a THREE year old need to be concerned with bringing her own water?"

"a good technique for older kids but i think your kids are too young so it's not a developmentally appropriate expectation"

"A more age appropriate way would be have her help you pack her bag."

These commenters are right in that natural consequences is a very effective parenting technique, but it can also be fraught. There's a fine line between teaching kids responsibility and making them feel like no one is looking out for them. 3-years-old is a really tricky age for this kind of parenting. Toddlers can understand immediate cause-and-effect relationships, but have trouble linking their actions with future consequences. So while there's nothing wrong with introducing concepts of consequences, independence, and responsibility to kids 3 and under, it's important to keep expectations in line with what's age-appropriate.

It sounds like Chelsea's got a good handle on the right balance, but in less-careful hands this kind of approach could be a disaster.


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