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Photo by 傅甬 华 on Unsplash

Cats are far more badass than we give them credit for.

Cats have a reputation for being aloof and standoffish, like they're better than everyone and simply can't be bothered. Those of us who have cats know they're not always like that … but yes, they're sometimes like that. They can be sweet and affectionate, but they want affection on their terms, they want to eat and play and sleep on their own clock, and we puny, inferior humans have little say in the matter.

There's a reason why we have obedience schools for dogs and not for cats. Maine coon or Bengal, Savannah or Siamese, ragdoll or sphynx, domestic cats of all breeds are largely untrainable little punks who lure us into loving them by blessing us with the honor of stroking their fur and hearing them purr.

But perhaps we assume too much when we think cats are full of themselves for no good reason. Maybe they are actually somewhat justified in their snootiness. Maybe they really, truly are superior to pretty much every other creature on Earth and that's why they act like it.


(Cats, if they could talk, would be nodding and prodding us along at this point: "Yes, yes, you're so close. Just a little further now, keep going.")

Think about it. They're beautiful and graceful, but also quick and powerful. They groom constantly so they're almost always clean and their fur even smells good. They can fall from ridiculous heights, land on their feet and walk away unscathed. They're wicked good ambush hunters. They can walk completely silently, like ninjas, then pull out the razor blades on their feet at will and do serious damage in an instant.

All of that makes them impressive specimens, but ironically it's their total hubris that makes them truly superior. When they feel like it (because cats only do things they feel like doing) they will take on anyone and anything. Big, small, dangerous, fierce—doesn't matter. That unbridled confidence—earned or not—combined with their physique and skill makes them the badasses of the animal world.

Want proof? Here ya go:

The lightning-fast smackdown is really the cat's weapon of choice, isn't it? They're so fast with the swipe-slap, it takes their victims by surprise. "Aww, you're so cute and cuddly, look at y—OUCH!" And then the way they just stand there and stare with their big eyes and their ears back. It's unnerving. Throw in a little hiss or yowl, and no thank you.

If that video wasn't enough to convince you, here's another.

The snakes, man. I can't get over the snakes.

Cats really are better than us and every other living thing, basically. And even if they aren't, they believe they are, which counts just as much. They're either the ultimate creatures or the ultimate conmen. Either way, you just don't mess with them.


This article originally appeared on 08.17.22

We often hear stories of dogs rescuing humans from precarious situations, but rarely do we hear such stories about cats. In fact, our feline friends have such a reputation for aloofness, people often joke that cats basically don't care whether we thrive or perish.

One woman's cat in Cornwall, England is defying that stereotype, however.

When an 83-year-old woman went missing last weekend, concerned neighbors alerted the police and a search was begun, according to BBC News. Thankfully, it didn't take too long for her to be found, thanks to her loyal cat, Piran. The sleek black kitty meowed incessantly at the spot where the woman had fallen down a ravine at the edge of her property, which led neighbors to look there.

"The cat is very attached to her, and he was going back and forth in the gateway and meowing, so I decided to go and search the maize field," neighbor Tamar Longmuir told Sky News.


"Without the cat waiting at the gate to that field, it could have been hours later that I or anyone else would have checked there."

The ravine was 70-feet deep, "with incredibly difficult access and uneven terrain" and a stream at the bottom, according to BBC News. Fire crews were able to scale the ravine to get to her and she was airlifted to a nearby hospital, where she was in stable condition.

"Piran the cat saved the day!" said Bodmin Police of the rescue.

Good job, Piran. Way to give cats everywhere a good name, and well done saving your beloved human.

Some cats have it all. Seriously.

For some cat owners, their furry friends are equal to (or in some cases, greater than) humans, and they have the digs to prove it.

Take, for instance, the adorable little bedroom Twitter user @CinnamonBear9 shared with the world this week. Kitty has a bed, complete with bedspread that matches mom's and dad's. He has pictures on the walls, a rug, a miniature chair, some tiny yarn balls, and a mini scratching post. And the pièce de résistance? A wooden wall frame that holds a tablet so the cat can watch bird videos on YouTube.


CinnamonBear on Twittertwitter.com


"Here is the bedroom we finished for our cat this weekend," they wrote. "He actually goes in to nap and watch birds on YouTube. :)"

No, he really does, though.

Like, actually.

CinnamonBear on Twittertwitter.com


This couple is not the first to share an epic tiny home they made for their cat. Check out the posh pad of this cat from @newbuild_newlyweds on TikTok. And this is after a makeover of the first fancy closet home their kitty was fortunate to have.


Don't worry, the cat can't get trapped in that closet. In another video, they showed the most adorable cat door ever made (look at the back!) that allows the cat to go in and out at her leisure.


@newbuild_newlyweds Reply to @kghasfun Since so many of y'all think we lock her in here 😹 Cat door linked in our bio on our LIKEtoKNOW.it page! ##catsoftiktok ##cats ##cat
♬ Kitty Remix - Will&Wesson


@newbuild_newlyweds

Reply to @kghasfun Since so many of y’all think we lock her in here 😹 Cat door linked in our bio on our LIKEtoKNOW.it page! #catsoftiktok #cats #cat

If you're thinking that there's no way a cat needs that kind of castle, you're probably right. But that doesn't mean they don't appreciate it. This puddy tat made herself at home in a kid's dollhouse, after all.

Maybe it was supposed to be a hint for her owners. "I desire a cat cave, complete with wall decor. Make it so, hooman."

Then again, most cats are never more blissful than when they are sitting in a simple cardboard box, so...yeah. No pressure to keep up with Joneses' fancy-schmancy cat cribs.


However, there's always Peter Cohen, the home builder with 22 rescue cats who transformed his home into a complete playground for cats, who puts everyone else to shame.

(Make sure your cats aren't around to see this. They'll side-eye you forever.)

(Also, can the Cohens adopt me, please?)

We Revisit Man's Cat Playland and our Hearts Explode Againwww.youtube.com

Those of us with cats know that cats are quirky and finicky and there's no real pleasing them no matter what we do. There is affection when they feel like it and contentedness at random. Their alternating aloofness and demands for attention are what make cats the oddly lovable creatures they are, and their independent spirits are what draw us to them in the first place. (That and their gorgeousness. Cats really are the perfect specimen.)

So whether you treat your feline friend to the life of a princess or a pauper, just know that they may or may not care either way. It probably depends on the day, the alignment of the stars, the direction of the wind, or some other variable that only cats know and refuse to confess.

But if putting together a home makeover for your cat makes you happy, by all means, knock yourself out. If your cat ends up loving it, fabulous—your work will have been worth it. And if your cat ends up ignoring it completely, at least you've got some adorable photo ops out of it.