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grandparents

Who doesn't wanna stay at Camp OmaPapa?!

In a sea of unsavory stories featuring toxic, uninvolved grandparents out there on the interwebs, stories like this feel all the more uplifting and wholesome.

Enter Paula, or “Oma,” as she’s affectionately known as by her grandkids. In a clip posted to TikTok, we learn that she and her husband, “Papa”, not only agreed to watch the grandchildren—aged 5, 4 and 2— for nine days while their adult children celebrated their anniversary, they fill the stay with fun activities in a project they aptly named “Camp OmaPapa.”

Seriously, no stone was left unturned while dreaming up this next-level camp. To stoke some excitement, Paula had mailed the kiddos an official invitation to Camp Oma Papa, telling them what to bring and what type of activities to look forward to.


The carefully curated list of activities (ice cream on Sunday, zoo on Wednesday, scooter ride on Monday, etc.) lived on one wall, while another hall had a single blue frame out of painter’s tape that would feature that day’s schedule—providing a perfect balance of structure and free play that all kids need, even in the summertime.

They even created official Camp OmaPapa shirts for their little campers, along with a ”Welcome to Camp OmaPapa” ushering them in. How cute is that?! Talk about going all out.

Needless to say, viewers were impressed…if not a little jealous.

“They don’t make grandparents like this anymore, ” noted one person

“As a mom with no village this is amazing, our kids and grandkids are lucky to have you,” lamented another.

Still a third wrote, “My parents have never even taken my kids out for an ice cream cone. This is so awesome.”

In a response to the aforementioned comment, Paula reveals that her own kids had grandparents that “didn’t want anything to do with them,“ which taught her what kind of grandparent she didn’t want to be.

However, several others chimed in with similar “camps” created by other similarly awesome grandparents.

“Yes! My mom and I do this every year but it’s ‘cousin camp.’ We all look forward to it every year!"

“My mom has a ‘bidi bootcamp.’ Originally it was because every time the grands went to bidi’s house they learned something new. Potty training, paci withdrawal, bottle to cup, etc…The name ‘bidi’s bootcamp’ is just for fun now.”

And of course, several were asking if Camp OmaPapa would be accepting new campers next year—kids and adults alike.

For those next-level grandparents wanting to create something like this for their own grandkids, Paula has more detailed videos breaking down what the kids did each day. Here are a few samples:



 
 @pbev12 Day 3 in the books! Stay tuned for Day 4 of Camp OmaPapa✨ #summercamp #campomapapa #columbuszoo #jerseymikes #artsandcrafts #smores #oma #papa @jerseymikes @Columbus Zoo and Aquarium ♬ Soft - The Pianist & D'Michel leb 
 
 

One important thing to note: it’s pretty evident that Camp OmaPapa isn’t just creating core memories for the kiddos, but for Oma and Papa as well. All while giving parents the village they so desperately need. All in all, it’s a pretty beautiful thing to see.

Check out more things OmaPapa-related by giving Paula a follow on TikTok.

Image via Canva

People offer their theories on why Boomer grandparents are more absent.

Boomer grandparents have recently come under fire by their Millennial children for how they grandparent. Many Millennials have opened up online about their parents' less-than-stellar help with grandkids and their overall absence.

In a Reddit forum discussing the differences between generations, user @No_Language_423 posed the question: "Why are so many Boomer grandparents hands-off?" They went on to add, "Genuinely curious about this. Why is it that so many Boomer grandparents seem completely uninterested in being involved or helping out with their grandkids in a real, consistent way?"

In a further explanation, they added, "From what I’ve seen and heard, a lot of Boomers actually did have active, supportive parents when they were raising their own kids. Their moms would babysit, cook, or even move nearby to help out. But now, when Millennials become parents and hope for that same kind of support, it’s like even asking is seen as too much. Some even act insulted by the idea."

 old couple, grandparents, grandma, grandpa, older couple up s GIF  Giphy  

However, they also noted this description of Boomer grandparents can't be generalized. They added, "Of course, there are outliers. I’m not talking about the people who comment, 'Well I help my kids all the time.' That’s great, but I’m noticing a pattern, not isolated cases. There seems to be a broader generational vibe around this. It doesn’t feel like a case-by-case thing, it feels like a shift in attitude."

They ended their post with more pondering thoughts. "At the same time, I hear a lot of Millennial parents saying they already plan to be very involved grandparents someday. So what changed? Is it a cultural shift? A difference in how retirement is viewed? Or maybe Boomers didn’t get as much help as we assume? Curious to hear what others think, especially from people who’ve experienced this dynamic firsthand."

Many people chimed in with their thoughts and firsthand experience as to why Boomer grandparents seem to be hands-off. These are 15 of the most compelling responses.

 boomer, boomers, boomer grandparents, grandparents, boomer grandkids Old Lady Reaction GIF  Giphy  

"The parents of boomers didn’t call their kids boomers; they called them the ME generation. Because it was all about them. They’re the ME generation." —@BEniceBAGECKA

"They were also pretty hands off as parents, too."—@ azulsonador0309

"Their moms were 23 when they had kids. Their kids were 23 when they had kids. Grandma was 46. Today’s grandmas are in their sixties. They have a hard time getting through the day without their own naps." —@Ok_Membership7264

"My theory is that it's related to people having kids later in life. The grandparents are older on average." —@nineoctopii

 retire, retirement, boomer, boomers, boomer grandparent Season 7 Showtime GIF by Dexter  Giphy  

"It's because they had children because 'that's what's done,' not because they actually wanted them. Now that they're 'free,' they aren't going to give that up for anything. Notice how they are also distant with their own kids. It's not like they're interested in their kids, but not the grandkids. They want nothing to do with any of it." —@ExcellentCold7354

"I'm 56. Most 56 year olds these days still have full time jobs and other responsibilities to where babysitting and moving are not viable options." —@shammy_dammy

"Have you met Gen X? They were feral kids for a reason. The boomers could barely be bothered to raise their own children. They certainly aren't going to be stepping up for the grandkids." —@gwenkane404

 anxious parent, millennial parent, high maintenance parenting, parent, millennial parents My Baby No GIF by CBeebies HQ  Giphy  

"Millennials have also changed. Every time I offer to help, I get a scroll of instructions, gluten-free snacks, feelings charts, and nap negotiations that last longer than peace talks. Any small deviation is treated like trauma. It’s exhausting." —@Revolutionary-Buy655

"I'm a millennial with Boomer parents. My parents were pretty hands off when I was a child, so it's not surprising they were hands-off with their grandchildren. My parents dropped me off with my grandparents for weekends so frequently that I had my own bedroom there. I plan to be an involved grandparent because I value the relationship I had with my own grandparents so much. I feel sorry for the Boomers. They don't realize how much they are missing out on by focusing on themselves." —@CandidateNo2731

"They were sold the idea of retirement their entire lives. And now they feel entitled to that instead of adjusting with the times. They’re loss, historically." —@rollbackprices

 parents, parenting, frustrated parents, annoyed parents, boomer parents season 7 kids GIF  Giphy  

"I think part of the answer is because a lot of them didn’t really want to have kids in the first place. But back then it’s just what you did. You got married at 20 and started popping out babies shortly after. If you didn’t, you were an abomination to the family." —@Screamcheese99

"We are older than the previous generation's grandparents. Believe it. Being 60+ and trying to care for toddlers is hard! Also, despite our experience and knowledge, we are often given ridiculous instructions and rules to follow by our own children, along with lists of likes/dislikes to adhere to. They expect entertainment in ways we are just not able to provide. Personal example from my attempt at babysitting my grandchild: I literally have not moved the car seat, that she installed, even an inch, but my DIL huffs, sighs, makes comments when getting her out of it. I am nice enough to drive her to her job to shorten their commute home, but I even do that wrong. So, forget it. I tried." —@TXteachr2018

"I think its because we live so far away from each other." —@Apprehensive_Pie_105

 worlds apart, far away, long distance, live far apart, distant could not be more different long distance GIF by Jay Sprogell  Giphy  

"Hmm. I feel like the sense of community is gone. Starting with the Boomers in my family they emigrated to the US and scattered away from each other. States away from each other they had no support system and worked themselves ragged. There wasn’t really a village to help raise a child. Now that they are retired it’s like having a second chance at life and they don’t want to spend it watching kids. They want to pursue their hobbies and relax which I honestly don’t blame them." —@KorraNHaru

"Many Boomers (not all! so don't come for me lol) have deep, untreated trauma and mental health issues. Many are even very detached from their own existences at this point. Narcissistic traits are common among them, which is based in deep self-loathing. I think deep down a lot of them feel ashamed of how they raised their kids and don't want to mess up their grandkids as well." —@Arysta

Gramma and Grampa made a keepsake of their time with Ricky.

There are kitten lovers…and then there are Ricky's grandparents. When Izzie Grass left her kitten, Ricky, with her parents for two weeks, she had no idea what was in store for her after she got him back. Not only had Ricky been well taken care of, but his adventures with his human grandparents were fully documented in a photobook created by Grass' mother, which she titled "Ricky Goes to Gramma's and Grampa's."

"The photo album that reads like a children's book first went viral when Grass shared it on TikTok in 2020. Now, it has resurfaced again and people are clamoring for more riveting Ricky content after reading about how the kitten "helped Gramma do the dishes" and how "Cousin Jasper and Charlie ate most of" the pancakes Gramma made for him.

Check out how adorably extra Gramma is:

@goldfishclub

I’ll never run out of content. #Rickythesquittenkitten #cats #kitten #animals #pets #fyp #foryou #cute #happy #teachersoftiktok

 

Has any kitten ever been more loved?

"I would die for Ricky, Gramma, and Grampa," wrote one commenter.

"This is GOLD. I want to see 'Ricky Learns to Drive.'" wrote another.

"My parents didn't even put this much effort into making scrapbooks for ME," shared another.

And apparently Grass isn't the only one with pet grandparents who are a little extra. "My mom made a full year calendar of my dog after only watching her for two days," a commenter wrote.

Grass told Newsweek that her mom told her she made the book because "that's what she does," adding, "She is known for creating very sentimental gifts."

 photobook, gift, photographs, memories Photobooks make sweet, sentimental gifts.Photo credit: Canva

Grass also shared that the book almost didn't get made because Ricky almost didn't make it as a kitten. He was brought to the veterinary clinic where Grass worked when he was 9 weeks old to be euthanized."

The individuals who dropped him off reported that they found a kitten with broken legs and that was throwing up everything they tried to feed him," she said. "I came back from my lunch early to care for this kitten and in the kennel was Ricky."

As it turned out, Ricky had some birth defects and health problems that required specialized care, but he didn't need to be euthanized. Grass took him home but needed a little time to prepare to give him the care he needed.

 orange kitten, orange tabby, ricky the kitten Orange kitten playing in the grassPhoto credit: Canva

"My mom stepped up and offered to watch him for a couple weeks while I got a handle of my schedule," Grass told Newsweek. "It was during this time that she created the book."

The fact that Ricky had specialized care needs at the time makes Gramma's photobook all the more endearing.

"He has made so much progress," Grass told Newsweek. "His esophagus works significantly better, he has learned how to walk, climb and run, and he continues to help me raise other foster kittens. Ricky is very loved and lives the life he deserved to have."

 kitten, orange kitten, cat in a shoe Kittens can make an adventure out of anything  Giphy  

With a mom and grandparents like he has, it's not a surprise.

Of course, the internet's going to internet, and some people apparently looked at Ricky's photobook a couple of years after the fact and complained that it was AI generated because of the way Ricky's paws looked. However, as Grass shared in a video in 2024, those paws aren't due to AI. They're just Ricky's real-life deformities that, ironically, make him appear AI-generated in the photobook. (It's also worth mentioning that the photobook video came out well before AI-generated technology became available to the masses.)

@goldfishclub

He spent two weeks with grandma because I was starting college again as was scared of him being home alone. Mamaw had to be his nanny and make sure he didnt hurt himself. #cat #kitten #animals #pet #goldfishclub #radialhypoplasia

"Ricky's legs are actually shaped like candy canes," Grass explains. "That's not AI. That's inbreeding. Spay and neuter your cats."

You can find more videos of Ricky and the animals Grass fosters on her TikTok channel here.

This article originally appeared two years ago and has been updated.

Canva Photos

A grandma says grandparents should never say "Don't tell mommy"

Conflict between parents and grandparents seems to be at an all-time high. There's always been friction there due to different parenting styles and generational points of view. But lately, our culture is changing so fast that the divide seems greater than ever. Parents gripe that grandparents aren't doing enough babysitting, while the grandparents are still working and struggling to make ends meet. Grandparents don't like how much screentime their grandchildren are getting while parents are completely overwhelmed and just treading water most days.

One big source of conflict is whether grandparents are willing to respect and follow rules that parents have established, even if they might not agree with them. For example, most parents want grandma and grandpa to mind their kids' bedtime if they're babysitting or not go overboard with sugary treats. It's very easy for a grandparent to bend these rules with three simple words: "Don't tell Mommy!"

One grandma has sparked a fierce debate with her strong opinion on the matter: Little secrets between kids and grandparents aren't cute, they're dangerous.

grandparents, grandma, grandpa, parenting, kids, family, dads, moms, fatherhood, motherhood, teens, parenting tips, grandparenting tips"If you can't do it openly, don't do it." Photo by Ekaterina Shakharova on Unsplash

Dee Dee More offers advice and tips for new grandparents who want to excel in their role and, as she puts it, "be more than grand." In one recent video, she explained why "Don't tell Mommy" is something grandparents should never find themselves saying.

“Don’t be the grandparent who teaches your grandchild their first lesson in deception,” she says. “Let me be clear: asking grandchildren to keep secrets from their parents crosses a line that should never be crossed.”

“Picture this: you give your grandchild an extra cookie and say ‘Don’t tell mommy!’ Seems harmless, doesn’t it? It’s not,” she goes on. “‘Don’t tell Mommy’ is literally asking a child to lie to their parents. Children need to know that they can tell their parents anything, and you’ve just taught them the opposite. You’re also undermining the parent child relationship. A child’s safety can depend on open communication with their parents. Encouraging secret-keeping is exactly how predators operate; you don’t want to normalize that."

To be clear, she's not saying that asking a child to keep secrets about extra dessert from their parents is predator-like behavior. But parents work extremely hard to make sure their kids feel safe to tell them anything, anything. We want them to feel like they can tell us if someone hurts them, or to know they can call us one day when they've had too much to drink instead of getting in the car.

This small gesture, though relatively well-intentioned, can undermine that process.

“The key is simple: respect parents’ rules. If you can’t do something openly, don’t do it at all. Your relationship with your grandchild should strengthen their family bonds, not weaken them."

@morethangrand

That 'harmless' request to keep a secret? It's not harmless at all. Here's what every grandparent needs to understand about why secrets from parents are never okay. Teaching children that they should keep secrets from their parents: 🔴Undermines trust between parent and child 🟢Creates confusion about honesty 🔵Mirrors predatory behavior patterns 🔴Weakens family communication Instead of secret-keeping, try transparent communication with the parents about boundaries and special treats. Remember: If you can't do it openly, don't do it at all. For more ways to create healthy connection with your grandchild, sign up for our weekly emails from the link on my page! #grandparents #grandparent #CommunicationTips #GrandparentsLove #AdultChildren #NewGrandparent #newgrandparents #newgrandma #Grandparenting #grannytok #HealthyBoundaries #Boomer #EffectiveCommunication #GentleGrandparenting

Parents and grandparents alike chimed in to hard-agree with More's sentiment. Her words clearly seemed to strike a nerve with people on both sides of the parent-grandparent relationship.

The video was viewed over 30 thousand times on TikTok. Here are a few of the best comments:

"Granny here. Thank you for this. Safe adults do NOT ask children to keep secrets."

"I'm glad this is being talked about. I think people generally have good hearts, but they need to realize how damaging this is."

"And a grandparent who has an issue with this or says that the parent is being ridiculous, they are not safe people!!!"

"If you can’t do something openly don’t do it at all"

"you also make them believe the parent are going to be furious with the kid instead of the grandparent for something the grandparent did"

"My inlaws told my child not to tell me that they drove him without a carseat (in the front seat no less) and as a result have not been left alone with any of my kids since. It is unsafe for the child, and also for your relationship with your adult child."

More's video also raised bigger questions about how families should handle secrets and "lies of omission."


@morethangrand

With Easter coming up, grandparents may need a reminder that filling an Easter basket is not their job. Parents get to do all the fun firsts with their children--just as you did. Do they want your help? Maybe! So ask them! Don't just show up with an Easter basket, and claim the Easter bunny dropped it off at your house. What do you think? Should grandparents get to have the fun of the "firsts" with their grandchildren? #grandparents #grandparent #CommunicationTips #GrandparentsLove #AdultChildren #NewGrandparent #newgrandparents #newgrandma #Grandparenting #grannytok #HealthyBoundaries #Boomer #EffectiveCommunication #GentleGrandparenting

Several commenters chimed in that they teach their kids about "fun secrets" or "surprises" and how those are different than bad secrets. For example, we're not going to tell Mommy what we got her for her birthday. That's a fun secret, or a surprise. The key element of a surprise is that it's not meant to stay hidden forever; it's meant to be shared when the time is right.

Hiding something because we're afraid of the repercussions is very different.

And, by the way, it's not just grandparents who do this. Even parents themselves do it. Dads let the kids watch an R-rated movie and say "Don't tell Mommy." Mom lets the kids off the hook for an agreed-upon consequence and winks, "Don't tell Daddy." It undermines trust and safety no matter what adult is doing it.

There are gray areas, though, and it's not always clear cut. Part of helping your kid learn to trust that they can tell you anything is letting them know that you won't go and blab about it. It's not so much about secrets, or surprises, but everyone's right to privacy—even children. If my daughter wants to keep puberty-related conversations between her and her mom, she has that right, and I trust both of them to let me know what I need to know.

It's complicated, and it's easy to overthink every little thing.

"The key is to stay in the area between over-thinking and being thoughtless," More explained. "Thinking before we do something is usually the best way to go!"