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In 2011, Denzel Washington shared a 54-second vision to unlock your potential that still resonates

It was a life-changing commencement speech.

via University of Pennsylvania/YouTube

Denzel Washington speaking at the University of Pennsylvania.

Denzel Washington is a generational talent, beloved by both critics and fans, and has starred in some of the most important movies of the past 40 years, including Glory, American Gangster, Training Day, Malcom X, and Flight. But his success didn’t come overnight. Like most actors who weren’t born into Hollywood royalty, he endured countless failed auditions until he finally made it.

The actor shared his life-changing advice on failure in 2011 during a commencement speech at the University of Pennsylvania, and the insight remains as relevant today as it was then. Recently, it was reshared on Twitter by Blake Burge and received 2.5 million views. In his speech, Washington warns the graduates who are clinging to the idea of having something to fall back on if their dreams work out. Instead, he believes they should position themselves to “fall forward.”

Washington shared a positive example of the power of persistence by juxtaposing a failed audition at the Cort Theater on Broadway when he was younger with a recent performance at the theater where he played the lead. However, he also warns against being afraid of failure, which can lead to an eternity of regret.

Denzel Washington's advice on failure

 

Last year, I did a play called Fences on Broadway. Someone talked about it. Won the Tony Award. And I didn't have to sing, by the way. But here's the kicker. It was at the Cort Theatre. It was at the same theater that I failed that first audition, 30 years prior… The point is every graduate here today has the training and the talent to succeed. But do you have the guts to fail?

Here's my second point about failure. If you don't fail, you're not even trying. I'll say it again. If you don't fail, you're not even trying. My wife told me this great expression. To get something you never had, you have to do something you never did. Les Brown's a motivational speaker. He made an analogy about this. He says, "Imagine you're on your deathbed, and standing around your deathbed are the ghosts representing your unfulfilled potential, the ghost of the ideas you never acted on, the ghost of the talents you didn't use. And they're standing around your bed, angry, disappointed, and upset. They say, 'We came to you because you could have brought us to life,' they say. 'And now we have to go to the grave together.'"

So I ask you today, how many ghosts are going to be around your bed when your time comes? You've invested a lot in your education, and people have invested in you. And let me tell you, the world needs your talents.


Washington’s speech teaches people a bittersweet lesson by providing a window into seeing all the possibilities that their lives can hold. But also, like a visit from the ghosts of Christmas future, it gives people a dark glimpse into what their life can look and feel like if they don’t pursue their dreams. In the speech, he shares a great piece of actionable advice: “To get something you never had, you have to do something you never did.” This is an invasion to everyone who hears it: What do you really want in life, and what can you change to get it?

Here is the entire speech.

  - YouTube  www.youtube.com  

 
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Modern Families

Seth Rogen was asked a question about being childfree that men never hear. He answered honestly.

“I mean, a lot of people have kids before they even think about it, from what I've seen, honestly,” he said.

via Stephen McCarthy/Collision via Sportsfile/Wikimedia Commons

Seth Rogen on stage during the opening night of Collision 2019 at Enercare Center in Toronto, Canada.

Childless women in the public eye are often plagued by the question: “So, why don’t you have any children?” It’s a deeply personal question that cuts right to the bone, and there can be many answers. But, if the woman doesn’t want children and says so publicly, she is bound to face some judgment.

"[I don't] like [the pressure] that people put on me, on women—that you've failed yourself as a female because you haven't procreated. I don't think it's fair," Jennifer Aniston told Allure. "You may not have a child come out of your vagina, but that doesn't mean you aren't mothering—dogs, friends, friends' children."

On the Monday, March 6 episode of “The Diary Of A CEO” podcast, host Steven Bartlett asked actor Seth Rogen why he’s childless, and it was a rare moment where a man in the public eye was challenged on the topic. Rogen gave a thoughtful explanation for his and Lauren Miller’s decision to be child-free.

Rogen and Miller were married in 2011.

seth rogen, seth rogen kids, set rogen comicon, set rogen wife, seth rogen family, actorsSeth Rogen speaking at the 2016 San Diego Comic Con International, for "Preacher", at the San Diego Convention Center in San Diego, California.via Gage Skidmore/Wikimedia Commons

“There's a whole huge thing I'm not doing, which is raising children,” Rogen told Bartlett. The host attempted to play devil’s advocate and asked Rogen if he considered whether having children might have made him and his wife “happier.”

“I don't think it would,” Rogen responded.

Then, as if anticipating the question, the “Pineapple Express” star upended one of the arguments that people who have children often make: that people who don’t have children have no idea what it’s like.

“I've been around obviously a lot of children; I'm not ignorant to what it’s like…Everyone I know has kids. I'm 40, you know? I know,” Rogen said. “Some of my friends have had kids for decades. Some people want kids, some people don't want kids.” He added that many people seem to have kids without considering the issue.

“I mean, a lot of people have kids before they even think about it, from what I've seen, honestly,” he said. “You just are told, you go through life, you get married, you have kids—it’s what happens.” Rogen and his wife have only grown stronger in their decision and they believe that it has helped their relationship.

“Now, more than anything, the conversation is like, ‘Honestly, thank God we don’t have children,’” he continued. “We get to do whatever we want. We are in the prime of our lives. We are smarter than we've ever been, we understand ourselves more than we ever have, we have the capacity to achieve a level of work and a level of communication and care for one another, and a lifestyle we can live with one another that we've never been able to live before. And we can just do that, and we don't have to raise a child—which the world does not need right now,” Rogen concluded.

lauren miller, seth rogen, lauren miller husband, seth rogen wife, childfree, golden globesSeth Rogen and Lauren Miller at the 69th Annual Gold Gen Globes Awards.via JDeeringDavis/Wikimedia Commons

Rogen received a lot of pushback for his comments, and two years later, in an interview with Esquire, he addressed the criticism and doubled down on his decision. “People really had strong takes on it, being like, ‘F**k this f**king guy,'" he said. “Well, if you hate me that much, why do you want more of me?” He also addressed those who asked, "Who's going to care for you when you get older?"

“Is that why you’re having kids? Because I have two things to say: One, that’s very selfish to create a human so someone can take care of you. And two, just because you have a kid, I hate to break it to you, that doesn’t mean they’re going to do that,” he said.

Everyone has the right to choose whether or not to have children, and no one has the right to judge them. Rogen and Miller have thought their decision through and should be applauded for living how they see fit. It’s cool to see Rogen with such a thoughtful opinion on the matter. It’d be even cooler if celebrities never had to discuss the topic in the first place.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

This article originally appeared two years ago.

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Robert De Niro gives a hilariously candid response when asked about his 'friendship' with Oasis

Tell us what you really think.

Images via Wikicommons

Robert DeNiro and Noel Gallagher from Oasis

Oasis's Noel Gallagher might have a bone to pick. No, not with his brother Liam, though probably that too. This time, it could possibly be with legendary actor Robert De Niro.

Let's back it up. About nine years ago, Noel posted an Instagram photo where he's sitting at a table with Robert seemingly deep in conversation with the caption: “So we’ve been down to the South of France for a few days, and at a 17-hour lunch at our friend's house THIS... THIS... Actually happened!!!”

The "friend"—it turns out—was Bono, of course, the front man for the band U2. As reported by Alex Flood for an article on NME, Noel not only posted the photo but kept telling the story to anyone who would listen. One such person was Alex Goldstein on the UK radio show TalkSport, who had Noel on as a guest.

robert de niro, actor, famous, celebrities, gif robert deniro GIFGiphy


He says to Noel, "Robert De Niro, you've tweeted a picture." Noel quickly points out he didn't "tweet" it, he "grammed" it. Once that's all settled, Goldstein asks how the "17-hour lunch" came about.

Noel humble-brags that his friend "casually mentioned" that De Niro was joining him and his then-wife Sara. Genuinely excited, Noel then confesses, "The only thing that could top that is probably going on a bender with Jack Nicholson." Noel then claims that the dinner started at 1:00 p.m. and went until 6:00 a.m. the following morning. "I don't remember dinner being served."

- YouTubewww.youtube.com


When asked if De Niro knew who he was, Noel admits, "I gotta say, he didn't have a clue, no." And even better, he—according to Noel—said, "Write down the name of that band again that you were in."

Cut to this week. De Niro is making the press-junket rounds for his new film The Alto Kings, directed by Barry Levinson. NME Magazine writer and interviewer, Alex Flood, sat down with him and candidly says, "Robert, I know that you've met Noel Gallagher because he posted this picture of you at a dinner on his Instagram in the South of France once." Seemingly taken aback, both Robert and his co-star Debra Messing look a tad worried. The picture is then handed to Robert, who studies it like a script.

"He's gone on the radio to talk about it, and I just wanted to know if you remembered that and any memories of what happened."

The 81-year-old actor does not remember. "But," he says, "I know where it is. And I heard about it through a mutual friend who knows him. He said they were getting back together and it's a big, big deal."

Flood goes on to relay what Noel had said about the whole day/night. "He said he bent your ear for about two hours. He said you didn't know who Oasis were, but when you were leaving, you asked him—'what was the name of that band?' And I just wondered, did you go away and listen to them?"

Oasis, band, gif, musicians, music, British 90S GIF by OasisGiphy

De Niro and Messing explode in laughter. "No!" He then adds, "But I did have a mutual friend who told me we almost had dinner with him, supposedly, last night. It didn't happen, but anyway..."

Hopefully, that means Noel still stans De Niro, despite possibly not having reciprocity. However, his feelings about his brother Liam? We might have to wait until after their upcoming reunion tour to find out.

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Man runs into Willem Dafoe on the street and they end up having an incredible conversation

"What do you do for a living?"

Photo credit: Canva, Harald Krichel/Wikipedia

Nobody wants to be asked "where do you see yourself in five years." Not even Willem Dafoe.

There are just certain actors who have such recognizable faces they can’t go anywhere without being spotted. Willem Dafoe, who has played in countless roles over his decades long career, is undoubtedly one of them. You see him on the street, and you’d be hard pressed not to do a double take.

Which is why people were flabbergasted to see a TikTok clip of him being asked “what do you do for a living?” by a complete stranger. Comments like “due just asked the most recognizable man in the world who he was” and “not knowing Willem Dafoe is a crime!” were plentiful.

Granted, folks didn’t realize that this stranger, named Khan, regularly stops celebrities to interview them on the street—including Adam Sandler recently—in addition to average joes he meets on the street. So “not recognizing” Dafoe was part of the bit, likely to make him feel more at ease. And thank goodness he incorporated that strategy, because it resulted in an amazing conversation between the two.

After Dafoe politely answered Khan’s initial question (“I’m an actor”) he then got to share what he loved most about the job: “nothing’s ever the same.” He also politely declined to offer advice for any aspiring actors, since “everybody’s gotta find their own way.” Honestly, that’s solid insight for anyone. Outside opinions are helpful, but they aren’t everything, especially when it comes to creating your own unique life.

Perhaps the real kicker came when Khan asked, “how do you wanna be remembered” as well as the question that has been the bane of many a job interviewee: “where do you see yourself in five years from now?”


 
 @hikhann_ What do you do for a living? #foryoupage #viralvideo #foryourepage #fyp #foryou #viral #whatdoyoudoforaliving ♬ original sound - Khan 
 
 


For both, Dafoe had similar answers. “I don’t think about that,” and “I don’t know…I have a hard time thinking beyond tomorrow.” This might seem counterintuitive for a man who likely has at least a couple of his upcoming years plotted out with projects, and certainly goes against the notion that you need to have a future vision for yourself in order to be happy and successful. But it’s a good reminder that no matter what our goals are, none of us fully knows what the future holds, and therefore can give ourselves permission to stay within the present moment.

Forbes contributor Liz Ryan once eloquently shared that the whole “five-year-plan paradigm”, as she called it, is extremely outdated, as it “comes from a day when life was either more stable and predictable than it is now or we were all deluding ourselves that it was.” She also noted the fear threaded throughout it, saying that people use a five year plan as a way to “claim a little power” against all the uncertainty of grown-up life. A much healthier strategy, she argued, would be to “know what you're passionate about, have some rough ideas about how to get closer to your passion over time and then react, react and keep reacting to shifts in the wind!” Dafoe certainly seems to agree with this notion.

Basically, for anyone who shudders at the thought of this question, whether at a job interview or just as they’re navigating everyday life, know that it’s not always important to have all the answers.

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