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Mental Health

The danger of high-functioning depression as told by a college student

Overachievers can struggle with mental health issues, too.


I first saw a psychiatrist for my anxiety and depression as a junior in high school.

During her evaluation, she asked about my coursework. I told her that I had a 4.0 GPA and had filled my schedule with pre-AP and AP classes. A puzzled look crossed her face. She asked about my involvement in extracurricular activities. As I rattled off the long list of groups and organizations I was a part of, her frown creased further.


Finally, she set down her pen and looked at me, saying something along the lines of "You seem to be pretty high-functioning, but your anxiety and depression seem pretty severe. Actually, it's teens like you who scare me a lot."


Now I was confused. What was scary about my condition? From the outside, I was functioning like a perfectly "normal" teenager. In fact, I was somewhat of an overachiever.

I was working through my mental illnesses and I was succeeding, so what was the problem?

I left that appointment with a prescription for Lexapro and a question that I would continue to think about for years. The answer didn't hit me all at once.

Instead, it came to me every time I heard a suicide story on the news saying, "By all accounts, they were living the perfect life."

It came to me as I crumbled under pressure over and over again, doing the bare minimum I could to still meet my definition of success.

It came to me as I began to share my story and my illness with others, and I was met with reactions of "I had no idea" and "I never would have known." It's easy to put depression into a box of symptoms.

lighted candles on man's hand lying on the floorPhoto by Fernando @cferdophotography on Unsplash

Even though we're often told that mental illness comes in all shapes and sizes, I think we're still stuck with certain "stock images" of mental health in our heads.

When we see depression and anxiety in adolescents, we see teens struggling to get by in their day-to-day lives. We see grades dropping, and we see involvement replaced by isolation. But it doesn't always look like this.

And when we limit our idea of mental illness, at-risk people slip through the cracks.

We don't see the student with the 4.0 GPA or the student who's active in choir and theater or a member of the National Honor Society or the ambitious teen who takes on leadership roles in a religious youth group.

person holding white printer paperPhoto by Sydney Sims on Unsplash

No matter how many times we are reminded that mental illness doesn't discriminate, we revert back to a narrow idea of how it should manifest, and that is dangerous.

Recognizing this danger is what helped me find the answer to my question.

Watching person after person — myself included — slip under the radar of the "depression detector" made me realize where that fear comes from. My psychiatrist knew the list of symptoms, and she knew I didn't necessarily fit them. She understood it was the reason that, though my struggles with mental illness began at age 12, I didn't come to see her until I was 16.

If we keep allowing our perception of what mental illness looks like to dictate how we go about recognizing and treating it, we will continue to overlook people who don't fit the mold.

We cannot keep forgetting that there are people out there who, though they may not be able to check off every symptom on the list, are heavily and negatively affected by their mental illness. If we forget, we allow their struggle to continue unnoticed, and that is pretty scary.


This article was written by Amanda Leventhal and originally appeared on 06.03.16













When I sit on a pillow on my bedroom floor to meditate, the first thing I notice isn’t my breath, or a sense of peace, or my inner voice — it's the sound of cars zooming past my window.

Normally I can tune out the noises of the city. I have to. I live in the middle of an urban area, so at all moments of the day, I can close my eyes and listen to cars honking, brakes squealing, and airplanes flying overhead.


No matter how long I’ve called cities my home, the urban din still induces anxiety in me. It’s a claustrophobic reminder that I’m surrounded on all sides by concrete, cars, and buildings.

Sometimes, I need an escape.

Lately, I’ve been finding that escape in small pockets of nature: the veins of green space that run through my city, the elements of the natural world that persist amid the concrete, and the sights and sounds of living things that are often drowned out by city life.

Learning how to connect to nature while in a dense urban area has worked wonders on my mental health, and it probably could help your head, too: There’s tons of research on how nature is medicine for the soul.

Here are a few of my strategies for connecting to the natural world when you live in a city.

Images via iStock.

1. Take advantage of green spaces inside the city.

Your city probably has more public parks than you realize. The next time you have a free Saturday afternoon, check out your city’s Parks and Recreation website instead of binge-watching the third season of "Parks and Recreation" on Netflix (no shame, I do it too). If you really want to put some distance between yourself and urban life, check out a nature preserve or find a trail that leads away from busy roads. If you’re feeling more social, see if your city’s Parks department has volunteer days, so you can explore a green space while meeting friends.

2. Think smaller.

Sometimes, you can’t disappear into a peaceful island inside the city, but you can still find some peace in the outdoors wherever you go.

A 2017 study from the University of British Columbia looked at the effects of connecting with nature on a smaller scale: noticing a flower, watering a houseplant, watching the sunset. Researchers found that even these seemingly minor encounters made people feel happier and more connected.

So the next time you’re feeling stressed or upset, take a walk to visit your favorite tree. It may seem silly at first, but it works.

Image via iStock.

3. Get out of town.

I know, I know — this isn’t always an option, especially if your transportation options are limited. But if you can rent a car or take a bus out to some nearby campgrounds or a state or national park, you should do it.

Spending time immersed in nature can literally change the way your brain functions. If you can find a spot without cell service, even better.

4. Spend more time noticing.

When you walk to the subway station, how many types of trees do you pass? The birds you hear outside your window — are they all the same species singing the same song, or is there variation?

You may not always have the time to physically escape the city to find nature, but you can take a few moments every day to let nature find you. No matter where you are, you can sit and listen and watch. You don’t have to be an expert birdwatcher or a trained biologist to engage in this exercise. But if you lean into your curious side, you will find yourself wanting to know more about the family of doves who live on your block, or how to distinguish between a sycamore tree and a maple. The more you discover about your non-human neighbors, the more connected you will feel to them. And that’s a relationship worth nurturing.

So get out there and find your peace in some nature! Sit quietly, observe, and listen to what the outdoors has to say.

Greg Dunn and Brian Edwards are scientists-turned-artists.

In their new project "Self Reflected," Dunn and Edwards used a new technique called micro-etching to illuminate one specific organ in the human body.

The pair developed the technique, which combines hand drawing, gilding, and photolithography along with data visualizations to create amazing art. It allows dynamic control of an image and its colors using reflective gold surfaces.


They took a slice of tissue of this mystery human organ and magnified it 22 times. And what they created was beyond incredible.

Photo by Greg Dunn and Will Drinker.

The kaleidoscopic vividness is surreal, but the sheer beauty of the images is only part of the story.

Photo by Greg Dunn and Will Drinker.

Each image looks wholly unique, but all the images are from a single human organ.

Photo by Greg Dunn and Will Drinker.

Can you guess what organ it is? We'll give you a hint...

Photo by Greg Dunn and Will Drinker.

If you zoom out a bit you'll see that...

Self-reflected in violets — the entire self reflected in micro-etching under violet and white light. Photo by Greg Dunn and Will Drinker.

...it's the brain!

Surprising, I know. My eyes still don't believe that this is a slice of the visual cortex.

The visual cortex, the region located at the back of the brain that processes visual information. Photo by Greg Dunn and Will Drinker.

Or that this is a 22-times magnification of our brain stem.

Raw colorized micro-etching data from the reticular formation and brainstem. Photo by Greg Dunn and Will Drinker.

But that's the beautiful gilded truth.

The midbrain, an area that carries out diverse functions in reward, eye movement, hearing, attention, and movement. Photo by Greg Dunn and Will Drinker.

“Self Reflected was created to remind us that the most marvelous machine in the known universe is at the core of our being and is the root of our shared humanity,” they wrote on their site.

The thalamus and basal ganglia, sorting senses, initiating movement, and making decisions. Photo by Greg Dunn and Will Drinker.

Combined, all the images in the series show only 500,000 neurons and circuits of the billions in the human brain. The images were hand-gilded with 1,750 sheets of 22-karat gold leaf.

The pons, a region involved in movement and implicated in consciousness. Photo by Greg Dunn and Will Drinker.

The first version of "Self Reflected," which consists of 25 etched panels of the brain, is on permanent display at the Franklin Institute in Philadelphia. The micro-etching technique makes the appearance of the art completely dependent on lighting that can change the viewers’ experience each time they look at it.

The entire Self Reflected micro-etching under white light. Photo by Greg Dunn and Will Drinker.

The ornate beauty of these images offers much more than what's on its surface. They are a glimpse into the organ that sets us apart as a species, that allows us the ability to create and appreciate art like this.

What Dunn and Edwards have done with this project is more than science and more than art — they've examined the deepest areas of our mind and found beauty reflected back at them.

Watch the video below to learn more about the project:

Clarification 4/29/2017: The article was updated to clarify that this photo project shows about 500,000 neurons and circuits in the brain, but in total the brain contains millions of them.

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UCLA

In 2015, a Sports Illustrated article profiled the deaths of 11 high school football players.

Five of the deaths were due to severe blows to the head. And as recently as November 2016, a 15-year-old Texas football player died after suffering a head injury while playing football.

"There are about 1.3 million high school and 2.8 million youth football players in this country. That's more than 4 million children and teenagers playing football," Ralph Nader and Kenneth Reed wrote in a Chicago Tribune op-ed. "Compare that number with the 1,700 or so adults playing football in the NFL. Yet, the nation's focus, when it comes to concussions, is on the NFL. That needs to be flipped."


Image via iStock.

Nader and Reed make an excellent point about spotlighting the safety issues surrounding millions of young athletes. And their concerns about head injuries are echoed by parents across the country. To better protect our children playing football, it's crucial to have a better understanding of concussions.

A roundtable discussion at UCLA shed some light on the current state of concussion research and how we can better educate people on the risks.

Roman Phifer, a 15-year NFL veteran and three-time Super Bowl champion, sat down with Adriana Galvan, a professor and director of the Developmental Neuroscience Laboratory at UCLA, and Dr. John DiFiori, chief of sports medicine at UCLA, for this informative talk.

Watch the full roundtable discussion right here:

One of the first things they discussed was what exactly a concussion is.

"Basically a direct or indirect blow to the head or neck that results in a sequence of symptoms and clinical findings that are characteristics of fogginess," explained DiFiori.

That definition is a long way from what Phifer experienced growing up. He recalled, "Back then, the protocol was, you know, you have a concussion ... tell me how many fingers you’re holding up or who’s the president or what the date was, then you’re good to go."

Dr. John DiFiori discusses the importance of being fully healed before returning to play. Screenshot via UCLA.

Considering football has the highest concussion rate among sports, it's important to understand how to address it. "Most concussions will resolve in about 10 days," said DiFiori. He added that this is true for almost 90% of cases.

This is especially significant since many kids return to play the same day that they get a concussion. One wrong hit could cause severe effects down the road or, even in some cases, lead to death.

Adriana Galvan gets insight into the sports angle of the issue. Screenshot via UCLA.

That's why Galvan stresses the importance of educating parents and young players on looking at things long term. "Adolescents are really primed to focus on the immediate, to focus on the reward, and that’s great in some contexts," she said. "But for them to really appreciate the potential dangers is important for them as well."

Some have called to eliminate youth football altogether, but this is a contentious idea.

Others are in favor of solutions that are less controversial and easier to implement. Limiting tackles in practice and getting rid of them completely for children below a certain age range could help reduce hits.

According to Practice Like Pros, 60% to 75% of head traumas occur during practice at the high school level. As a result, they suggest a time limit for full-contact practices and encourage players to report concussions right away. They also advocate for employing a full-time athletic trainer on every team, having an EMT on standby at every game, and supporting continuing scientific research. They'd even like to convert all youth leagues below ninth grade to flag football, a trend that has seen a meaningful rise.

Image via iStock.

Phifer stressed taking things a step further to make sure kids are playing properly. "You educate kids, you try to reduce the risk as much as possible," he said. "You tell them to keep [their] head up. You do all the other things that you can. You implement fines or penalties when kids are not doing it the right way."

What's key is taking action to make the sport as safe as possible.

Football is a meaningful sport for a lot of people, and Phifer talked about some of the game's positives beyond all the injuries. "The first thing that comes to mind is just being a part of something bigger than yourself," he said. "Having all these kids from different backgrounds, it doesn't matter about, you know, socioeconomic status. It doesn’t matter if you're rich or poor. We're all here together. Now you’re working for one common goal of trying to win and be successful and everyone's doing their part. So I think it really gives kids that development about teamwork and not being selfish."

Image via iStock.

Without question, there are countless Americans who love their football. But as the game continues to get bigger, we must also become better at taking care of players of all ages. By continuing to take action on that, it might be possible to accomplish what many athletes strive for in their careers — to change the game.