upworthy
Add Upworthy to your Google News feed.
Google News Button
Joy

8 life hacks that are so simple and effective it's surprising more people don't use them

From how to willingly get a cat in a carrier to handling annoying drivers, here are some solid life tips.

Man in a van smiling and giving a thumbs up sign

There are more creative ways to handle annoying drivers than flipping them the bird.

Have you ever come across a piece of advice that seem so obvious and awesome in hindsight that you can't believe you didn't think of it before?

"Life hacks" has become a bit of a buzz phrase in recent years, but there really are some habits and practices, often requiring minimum time and effort, that can be life-changing. Someone on Reddit asked people to share some of those "simple and effective" life hacks that people surprisingly don't know about or use, and the responses are a trove of "Oh, that's brilliant" tidbits of wisdom.


Here are some of the top tips:

How to get a cat to be comfortable in the cat carrier

Some cats don't mind the pet carrier, but a lot of cats act like it's made of lava.

"Leave the cat carrier out and open all the time. Then they don't panic when you get it out to go to the vet." – Mistie_Kraken

"That's a fantastic tip for reducing stress during vet visits! Keeping the cat carrier out and open as part of their environment helps them become familiar with it, making it less scary when it's time to use it. It's a simple adjustment that can make a big difference in your cat's overall well-being." – designsbymtj

"There’s probably still some anxiety inducing unfamiliar smells and sounds at the vet and also in the car. But at least he seems to like his carrier, that’s one stressor reduced." – twilightramblings


kitchen sink

Pipes can get funky when they haven't been flushed in a while.

Photo by Andrew Valdivia on Unsplash

A quick and easy sink pipe swipe

Stinky pipes? A little regular maintenance of hot water and gravity can take care of it.

"Every now and then, maybe once a week, fill up your kitchen sink(s) completely full of water, then pull the plug and let the water go down the drain in a big rush. The force of the water pushes out a lot of the slimy crud that has gathered in the pipes. No more clogged sinks." – PaulsRedditUsername

"Use almost boiling water to cut any grease in there as well!" – sunshinesmileyface

"I had a strange smell coming from my kitchen sink but fixed it by boiling some water and then pouring it down my sink." – dirtymoney

"Even better, first pour some vinegar down the drain. Then 10 or so minutes later let the sink fill up with hot water. (as hot as you can make it) And let that drain. Gets rid of even more slimy crud!" – Sanquinity

Write down those fleeting moments of potential brilliance

We always think we're going to remember, but we always, always forget.

"Always write down momentarily good ideas. Don’t lean on your memory." – bunny_shortcake

"And in complete sentences! Don't write "fridge pants," write out the whole thought like a stranger needs to understand it." – NeuHundred

"Yep. I shower before going to bed and I get some good ideas then. After the shower I write the idea down on a pad of paper that I keep at my desk just for ideas." – tc_cad

"Keep a journal near your bed. I've gotten AMAZING ideas in dreams. No, you won't remember when the alarm goes off, spend two minutes jotting down details at 2 am. Trust me." – Conscious-Shock7728

Be as kind and courteous as possible to customer service people

A little kindness can go a long way.

"Being genuinely nice to a customer service person (hotel, phone center, server, whatever) will get you way more free stuff then the people who yell and escalate for it. I had gig speed internet for a year for $20 a month because I asked the guy with genuine sencerity how his day was while dealing with an issue I should have been mad about. (He told me at the end of the call that he updated my internet package and to not question the bill next month)

Sometimes, you get nothing free out of it. But customer service people get yelled at all the time. They recognize people being jerks for free stuff. What they don't see often is kindness in a difficult situation.

Be genuine and out of your way kind, and the amount of free stuff you will get will surprise you." – mybossthinksimmormon

"Can confirm. Am customer service. Terms & agreements are the law of the land for assholes. Nice people? Wavy, gravy with those rules & what can I throw in for cheap or free." – bagolaburgernesss

"I worked in a high end hotel for the better part of my early twenties to early 30s. I couldn't tell you how many upgrades and free shit I gave to guests that were just decent to my staff and I. Literally for just not being jerks. Suite? You got it. Free room service? Absolutely. Comp Concert Tickets? I got you." – NotYourGoldStandard

closeup image of a shower head

Vinegar is the key to a clogged shower head.

Photo by Caleb Wright on Unsplash

Clogged or covered in minerals? Soak that sucker in vinegar.

It's incredible how much vinegar can do.

"People throwing out shower heads because the stream gets weak. Soak that shit in vinegar for 24 hours and you’ll have a brand new shower that will be as powerful as the day you bought it.

Edit: white or cooking vinegar. If you can’t remove the shower head, plastic bag and rubber bands." – Trytolearneverything

"Honestly, cleaning anything with vinegar is a huge life hack. It’s non-toxic, cleans really well, disinfects, keeps bugs away and can kill your weeds without poisoning the soil/ground water. It’s also a fabulous fabric softener and is great in the dishwasher too.

Editing to add that cleaning vinegar is better than cooking vinegar for these things as it’s more concentrated but both will do the trick. :)" – girl_in_flannel

Make it near impossible to forget something on the way out the door

Pair what you need to remember with something you know you can't forget.

"If you need to remember to take something with you the next day, put it in a bag and hang it on your doorknob the night before. If it's paperwork or mail, tape it to your door to where it's covering the handle. Usually if it's left on a kitchen counter or a side table or something like that, it will be forgotten if you're one of those get-out-the-door-at-the-last-minute the last minute type of people (like myself)." – goodmeowtoyou

"If I have something I have to take (from home/work whatever) I literally put my keys in the bag. Physically can't leave without touching the bag." – SerpensPorcus

"Or put it on top of your shoes if you keep your shoes by the door you go out.." – somercurial

Read the instructions. Seriously.

Sounds simple enough, but there are a lot of people who simply refuse.

"Read. Manuals, directions, instructions, etc. Most of your questions will be answered." – tabitharr

"I used to joke about this when I sold electronics. 'Real men don't read instructions....they come to me to tell them how the magic device works....'" – OddgitII

"I stick the manuals in a file folder in case I need to refer to it later. Plus if I sell the item it’s nice to have it to pass on." – kindlycloud88

"Once bought a $50 carbon monoxide detector. Took it out of the box, put the batteries in, lights turned on on the front: there was a funny looking little tab on the back, and impulsively, I depressed the tab.

Lights turned off, and did not turn back on.

Huh.

I read through the directions. That tab was the 'kill carbon monoxide detector completely and permanently' button, for when it’s useful life is over and it won’t stop emitting “I’m dying” chirps.

Felt like a massive dumbass." – spooky_spaghetties


Man in a van smiling and giving a thumbs up sign

Thumbs up, buddy!

Photo by RDNE Stock project/Pexels

Alternative 'hand signals' that work better than the bird

No need to fuel anyone's road rage. If you have a twitchy middle finger, try these alternatives.

"Instead of flipping people off while driving, give them a thumbs down. Flipping them off makes them defensive and angry. A thumbs down makes them feel stupid." – dragon0069

"Oh, my God. A few months back I was at a stop sign, trying to turn left. It sucked because it's one of those roads where you have to continuously look in each direction due to bends and hedges blocking the view. After some back and forth I finally thought I was in the clear. Right as I pull up a little more, this guy comes barreling down the hill GIVING ME A THUMBS DOWN. I will never forget it. I didn't feel stupid but like such a let down lmao I'd rather get the finger, laying on a horn or someone yelling at me. Literally anything else. It will haunt me forever. I'm still sorry about it!!" – popperboo

"I actually go the passive aggressive route & give a thumbs up 😂" – gallad00rn

"Or, if they are really annoying and want to provoke you, just smile at them and give them a friendly wave (and laugh as you watch them get even angrier)." – islandhopper37

"Blow kisses. It really seems to make them annoyed." – Unique-Union-9177

"I’ve always done a queen wave with great success." – eastofliberty

partnerships

5 ways people are going "all in" this week

From the silliest to the most sentimental, there are so many ways people are going “all in” on the internet this week. Here are our five favorites.

True

There's something truly special about watching someone go "all in." This could mean throwing an elaborately themed birthday party for a Chihuahua (see below) or something a little simpler, like surprising someone with a long-anticipated birthday present. Whatever it is, going "all in" means total commitment—no holding back, no second-guessing, just passion and full-throttle enthusiasm. It means being fully present in the moment and creating something truly special as a result.

In this roundup, we’ve scoured the internet for the best examples of people going all in—those moments where passion, creativity, and total commitment take center stage. Some are silly, some are sentimental, but all of them are a reminder that giving 100% is the only way to truly leave a mark on this world. Buckle up—these folks didn’t just show up, they went all in.

1. The guy who learned Mandarin to propose

@yinrun_hello He secretly learned Chinese to Propose 😭😭😭 #fiance #proposal #engagement #love ♬ pluto projector - ☆

Talk about commitment. Getting married is the ultimate example of being "all in," but this guy takes it to a whole other level. Shared to social media by content creator Yinrun Huang, the emotional video captures a marriage proposal that's completely in Mandarin from a non-native speaker. That's right—this guy learned a whole language (and executed it pretty well) to win his girlfriend's hand in marriage. Not only are the words beautiful, his dedication is, too.

2. Kid-approved snacks that help local communities  

It’s scientifically proven that kids are brutally honest, unfiltered, and don’t hold back—which is why our friends at All In couldn’t resist sitting down with this group and getting their honest opinion. Are these snack bars really that good?

The Bite Size Board has spoken—and they’re all in. Not only are these snack bars delicious, they’re also an easy way to help people in need: Every time you buy a bar, 2% goes to a community to help them get fresh food.

Want to try these Board-approved treats? Snag a free box by signing up with your phone number on Aisle. Then grab two boxes of All In bars at Sprouts, snap a picture of your receipt, and text it through Aisle. They’ll Venmo or PayPal you back for the cost of one box. Easy and delicious.

3. This Chihuahua’s extravagant birthday bash

@phoebeparsons__ Tell me you’re a DINK family without telling me #chihuahua #dink #mexican ♬ EVERLASTING LOVE - GROWS

Do you love your dog? Would you throw a birthday party for them? How about a full-out celebration in a Mexican restaurant that includes banners, party hats, and the entire restaurant serenading him? Yeah, we thought not. These pet owners are absolutely "all in" on this dog's birthday, and we love to see it. Not only is this celebration extravagant and clearly well thought-out, people in the comments section are jokingly pointing out that taking a Chihuahua to a Mexican restaurant is a nod to the dog's cultural heritage. If that was intentional, this might be the best dog birthday party we've ever seen.

4. Truly unhinged (and maybe true?) Taylor Swift theories

@grindcitymedia did taylor swift drop super bowl hints? 😲 #swifties #nfl #taylorswift ♬ original sound - grindcitymedia

OK, whether you love Taylor Swift or not, you have to admit that her fans (known as “Swifties”) have an incredible commitment to the fandom (and an eye for detail). Case in point: Last week on her boyfriend’s podcast, Taylor announced the upcoming release of her new album, The Life of a Showgirl. The news was responsible for breaking the internet, and also for spurring a ton of fan theories about the future album and her future performances. In case you didn’t know, Swift is famous for dropping “Easter eggs” that hint at things she’ll be doing in the future, such as when she kept flashing peace signs and dropping the number 2 in her instagram posts in the weeks leading up to her double album “The Tortured Poets Department” in April 2024. This time, Swifties have taken to social media to discuss potential Easter eggs that were hidden throughout her podcast appearance. The latest theory? Her constant references to sourdough bread were actually Easter eggs hinting at a 2027 Super Bowl Halftime performance. Only time will tell if that's accurate, but the enthusiasm, the attention to detail, and the hours of research that must have gone into all these fan theories is truly something to behold.

5. This dirt bike birthday surprise 

@dmndboys_

This is why I look forward to fatherhood 🔥

♬ original sound - dmndboys_

These parents didn't give their kid a birthday present—they gave him the best birthday present of all time. Not only did the setup require a lot of thought and planning, but check out this kid's reaction. You can tell this was something he'd been wanting for a long time. Going "all out" and getting such a great response in return—it's something amazing to see.


Snag your free (!!) snack bars here while this deal lasts.

@maplespetdinosaur/Instagram

The kids are alright!

The ‘90s/’00s music scene, especially genres like emo, pop-punk, and nu-metal, have been making a comeback—since the peak of COVID 19, really. Which makes a lot of sense. These styles originally emerged from a time of political and social upheaval as a way for young people to process what insanity was happening all around them and find a healthy way to let out their rage. This music still serves that purpose today, but with the added nostalgic effect of an “old-school” feel.

One teen band, called Maple’s Pet Dinosaur, has perfectly captured this gritty, retro vibe, not just in their now mega-viral song, “Lego,” but in the way they shot their music video…which just so happened to be filmed entirely on a neighbor's ring camera.

In the video, we see lead singer Maple Johns asking though the camera, “is it okay if we use your ring to make a music video, please?” to which the homeowner reluctantly replies, “Uh…yeah I guess…” (Is this part staged? Who knows? Who cares! It adds an awesome touch)

The band then immediately rocks out to a snippet from their song, which very much aligned with their ‘90s inspirations, which include Faith No More, Beastie Boys, and L7.

Watch:

Wasn’t that rad? Having it filmed via the ring cam gives such a fish-eye lens vibe, which all of us olds know is very apropos for the vibe they were going for. Many were even reminded of punk rock icons like Paramore and Avril Lavigne.

All in all, the video left viewers inspired for the future.

“Kids these days, you absolutely have to love their ingenuity. This generation rocks.”

“This gives me hope about the next generation of music. I legitimately enjoyed this song. And I can’t wait to see the whole video.”

'90s, band, music video, music, kids, pop punk Music video shot in fish-eye lens. media4.giphy.com

“Kids making garage bands a thing again is making this year a little better for me.”

In the comments section, the band shared that, like a lot of teens during lockdown, they began watching—and falling in love with— 90s/00s music videos, and were definitely trying to tap into that aesthetic for their own music. Mission accomplished.

'90s, gen alpha, kids, teens, cool, kids, alright The kids are all alright. media0.giphy.com

Pop-punk music has always been a distinct blend of catchy, dance-able (or at least headbang-able) beats paired with pretty emotionally raw lyrics depicting angst, heartbreak, and rebelling against the status quo. “Lego” certainly follows suit, as Johns said the song is a “bully diss track.”

“It’s for anyone who’s ever felt targeted and wants to fight back. A lot of songs about this topic are ‘in your feelings’ type ballads but I wanted to deliver a bully-beat down, a heavy ‘f*** you’ to anyone out there who tries to kill another person’s vibe and confidence. Writing this song gave me the strength to set boundaries and find my own people. Now I want to build that community further through this music.” (Life without Andy)

Just when you thought rock was dead, the kids prove they’ve got it handled. Give “Lego” a listen on Spotify, Apple Music, iTunes, and more.

Canva

A kid gets teased by classmates. Union Jack and American flags.

According to a meme making the rounds on social media, if you playfully mock your friends, you're "300 percent" more likely to be honest, loyal and have deeper bonds with them. But here's the catch. That number seems to have been pulled from thin air, as no one can find an actual source for that statistic.

What IS true, however, is that some researchers do believe that playful teasing can be a good thing. In his article for Psychology Today, Dr. Peter Gray Ph.D cites psychologist Dacher Keltner who claims teasing is "an intentional provocation accompanied by playful off-record markers that together comment on something relevant to the target."

But what was especially interesting about this false data making the rounds was how differently people responded to it. In particular, Americans and Brits/Aussies seemed to have very different points-of-view, at least on this Instagram thread.


Gray suggests that teasing amongst the people closest to you can take the form of showing someone you accept them despite their flaws. It can also serve as means to humble one another, encourage positive change and even test the boundaries of the relationship. "Teasing can be a sign of affection, a constructive form of criticism, or a cruel put-down. It can also be a semi-competitive verbal game, in which the players are testing one another’s abilities to keep cool in response to provocation and provide clever responses."

teasing, playful, joking, friendships An animated girl teases someone. Giphy

It's also noted how vital it is that the person on the receiving end of the "tease" understands the assignment. If their perception of the "jokes" is negative, or they're feeling sensitive, (particularly if there are third-party witnesses) the teasing slips quickly into bullying. In the study, "The Role of a Bystander in Targets’ Perceptions of Teasing Among Friends: Are You Really Teasing Me?" researchers Ildo Kim and Nicholas A. Palomares note, "Given the provocation goals involved in teasing, being teased in the presence of a third party could be undesirable to a target. The target’s response can differ depending on who the third party is (e.g., another close friend, an acquaintance, a stranger)."


After posting two women citing this stat on the @longevityxlab, the comment section was off to the races.

A handful of people pushed back against the notion, some simply writing, "No." One, (and we can't completely confirm that this person is American) writes, "I really doubt this in most cases. I have a doctorate in clinical psychology that I earned 4 decades ago. Saying hurtful things to one another is just hurtful. I think men pretend to be comfortable with it because it seems 'manly.' There are so many positive things to say to people we love. Maybe these friends are LOYAL to the friends who passively allow them to poke fun at them. I’d like to see the research."

Referring to the naysayers, one writes, "I’m assuming most of the comments are from Americans. In Britain we know this to be true. You only rip the piss out of your closest friends."

This commenter concurs. "Indeed I’m a Brit who lives in Australia. If I’m nice to you we have a problem."

This one gets more specific. "If mates don’t call you a K--b-head or a B-----d at least once when you are in their company, are they even friends?"

Of course, it's not just Brits and Aussies. People from all over the world including those from France, Brazil and Ireland commented that they essentially see playful teasing as their love language, as well. Obviously not ALL, and plenty of Americans take part in ribbing one another.

Ricky Gervais discusses American vs. British humor. www.youtube.com

But what can be confirmed is that many Brits truly enjoy the "insult" play. It's just a thing they often do. In the op-ed "The Difference Between American and British Humour" for Time Magazine, comedian Ricky Gervais writes of his fellow Brits, "We tease our friends. We use sarcasm as a shield and a weapon. We avoid sincerity until it’s absolutely necessary. We mercilessly take the piss out of people we like or dislike basically. And ourselves. This is very important. Our brashness and swagger is laden with equal portions of self-deprecation. This is our license to hand it out."

He further assures Americans, "This can sometimes be perceived as nasty if the recipients aren’t used to it. It isn’t. It’s play fighting. It’s almost a sign of affection if we like you, and ego bursting if we don’t. You just have to know which one it is."

Credit: Condé Nast (through Vogue Taiwan)

Prepare to get Thatcherized.

Adele has a face that is chiseled into the public's mind. She's been a global icon for two decades with a number of mega hit albums and songs. But this photo might be the most unforgettable of all. Perhaps you’ve seen the image in question previously (it seems to make the rounds every couple of years). But in case you missed it—it’s Adele’s face. Normal, just upside down.

Only it’s not normal. In fact, when you turn Adele’s face right side up, what you notice is that her eyes and mouth were actually right-side up THE ENTIRE TIME, even though the entire head was upside down. So when you turn the head right side up, the eyes and mouth are now UPSIDE-DOWN—and you can’t unsee it. Do you feel like you're Alice in Wonderland yet?

Just wait. Things get even more fascinating. Especially because this optical illusion is over 40 years in the making.

Below you’ll find the Adele photo in question. Go ahead. Take a look at it. Then turn the image upside down.


adele, thatcher effect, psychology Can't. Unsee.scontent-lax3-2.xx.fbcdn.net

Crazy right? And just a little terrifying?

As the Facebook post explains, this mind-boggling image highlights a phenomenon known as the Thatcher effect. Our brains, so much more used to recognizing faces that are right-side up, have difficulty detecting specific changes once a face is upside down.

margaret thatcher, colleage of thatcher photos, thatcher effect Image manipulation illustrating the Thatcher effect. Rob Bogaerts Image manipulation: Phonebox

Seeing that everything is more or less where it should be, our brains don’t notice anything out of the ordinary in Adele’s face until we turn her face back to a normal position.

The Thatcher effect got its name from British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher, on whose photograph it was first demonstrated back in 1980 by Peter Thompson, Professor of Psychology at York University.

This demonstration was one of the first to explore just how facial recognition works, and certainly the first to suggest that humans (and monkeys, it turns out) process faces on a more holistic level, rather than by individual components like lips and eyes. There's even evidence that rhesus monkeys and chimpanzees experience the Thatcher effect, meaning it may have deep roots in the evolutionary biology of mammals.

Since its publication, there has been a wealth of research exploring how our brain takes in both subtle and striking facial configurations.


- YouTube www.youtube.com


Funny enough, it was once believed that this illusion only worked on the Prime Minister’s face. But as Adele has proven, anyone can be Thatcherized.

This article originally appeared two years ago.

Heroes

Woman with terminal brain tumor shares her truly inspiring outlook on finding meaning in life

"Pretty soon, all the beautiful days stacked up into a beautiful life."

Photo Credit: Amber Stratton

A woman is living her best life, despite terminal health issues.

Amber Stratton had her world turn upside down nearly five years ago. She was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer and she fought it with every tool in the proverbial medical tool box. After chemo and a double mastectomy, it remained—so she did it again, along with radiation, and was finally deemed cancer-free in early 2022.

That is until two months later when she was told she had a terminal brain tumor. Her prognosis? About two years to live. But there has been something inside of her, despite such a scary diagnosis, that drives her to grab every day and fill it up to the brim with joy. She lives each day as fully as she doubling down on wearing pink and going all in on motorsports.

Amber Stratton, brain tumor, living life, positive thinking, cancer Amber Stratton stays extremely active in the face of health issues. Phtoto Credit: Reddit, Amber Stratton

Upworthy first reached out to Stratton last November via Reddit after she posted "Yearly post, 3 years into terminal brain tumor. Beating the odds and loving life!" She (like many) didn't realize there was a direct messaging system on the site but responded just last week with the subject header, "I'm still alive, woo hoo!"

We had the honor of talking to her about how she's doing and, more specifically, how she has trained herself to live in a present state with true grace that makes all the past hardships and future prognoses seem blurry in comparison to the crystal clarity of what this exact moment holds.

Stratton encourages others facing similar battles on Reddit, in particular commenting on a post to someone struggling with positivity. She writes, "A friend of mine I met in a support group told me to just 'live a beautiful day and then another.'"

We asked her about this and she responded, "I started telling myself I wanted to live a beautiful day and then another and pretty soon all the beautiful days stacked up into a beautiful life."

She says this way of thinking anchors her. "It helped me focus on the day in front of me and not worry about the future or things outside of my control. And on those days, I told myself I would do something I loved, something for someone else, or learn something new each day. I gotta tell you that’s been a blast and I think a fun way to live."

When asked for specifics on the new things she's tried, Stratton reeled off a list of exciting ventures. "I started riding stand-up jet skis shortly after the brain tumor and fell in love. Then tried snowmobiles and got to build a vintage snowmobile with my husband this winter and race it on ice 100 miles, which was super fun. I plan to race this winter too. And I got into riding dirt bikes and rock climbing. My husband taught me to weld, which was challenging since I have vision loss, haha, but I’m getting the hang of it. And I bought a 1971 Chevy I’m learning to put an engine in. We’re doing an LS swap."

Amber Stratton, cancer, brain tumor, best life, gratitude. Amber Stratton poses with her Chevy truck and dog. Photo Credit: Amber Stratton

She also discusses how her diagnosis has helped her sift through what really matters: time and how we spend it. "I spent time traveling with my mom and fishing with my boys and… just living."

This doesn't mean she lacks awareness of what's going on in her body; her reality gives her perspective. "Cancer changes you and being aware that you're living with a ticking time bomb in your head gives you perspective. I have two boys who are now 7 and 9 and I want them to see me as someone who didn’t give up, no matter what the odds. And even if my body shuts down eventually, I won’t let the cancer take my spirit and who I am while I’m here. Then the cancer wins and I’m so much more than cancer. I’m going out living full and if I live a long time well, then heck yeah it will be an awesome ride!"

Most of the time we're left in the dark as to how a job interview went.

So much of job hunting often feels like putting a ton of energy out into the ether. You have no idea if your resume is getting looked at, you never hear back after sending out application after application, and you end up wondering if the job you applied for even really exists. Even if you do make it to an interview, there’s rarely any feedback that comes after it, let alone a job offer.

Well, one job candidate did receive some post-interview feedback—albeit by accident—and it raised a dilemma about what to do next.

On Reddit, the candidate explained that after logging off of a Zoom interview, which they thought went pretty well, they noticed that the company they applied to unwittingly sent them not only a full rundown on the interview (including their thoughts on the job candidate), but a to-do list for the week as well.

job hunting, job interview, interview tips, finding a job, job tips, finding a job "I wonder if I just need to kick it up a notch?!”Photo credit: Canva

Much to their surprise, the company wrote that the OP “lacked energy” and was “more subdued” than other candidates.

“I suppose it’s not the worst feedback but it sucks to hear I don’t have this “energy” they’re looking for. I’m always super calm in interviews and generally laid back, so I wonder if I just need to kick it up a notch?!” they wrote.

In a “spicy update,” this person gave even more context alongside a surprising discovery: they noticed that there was also a video of their conversation. In it, the executive director actually commended this person for their "chillness." The other newly hired director, however, was the one that remarked that the OP’s communication skills "felt like pulling teeth." Only then did the executive director have a change of heart, saying their "energy was muted."

Then there was talk of which restaurant to eat at for a team dinner, and the difficulties of getting a dog sitter. Wow.

job hunting, job interview, interview tips, finding a job, job tips, finding a job “I suppose it’s not the worst feedback but it sucks to hear" media4.giphy.com

To make matters more complicated, this person was still invited to an in-person interview, which left them wondering, “Do I just pretend I didn’t see the recap and change up my personality for this next meeting?! Has anyone else accidentally received feedback after an interview?”

Turns out, similar situations have happened to several people.

"This actually happened to me a couple of months ago. I was the only woman among three men interviewing for the same role. An interviewer accidentally sent me all our feedback. It was interesting to catch his bias because what he criticized me for, he praised in another candidate. It was a blessing in disguise because I thought I was coming across as thoughtful and measured, but his comments were that I was 'meek.' Where I was 'hesitant,' the other candidate 'put thought into it.’ Mind you, this guy didn’t ask any questions and said he knew nothing about the job. It was on me to ask him questions, and he was going to judge based on that. WTF. I was (and am) annoyed by it, but it was an interesting lesson."

"This happened to a friend of mine in 2021. I said, consider it free career advice. He did, addressed the points, and landed a better job."

"I’ve had this happen to me. They put me on hold on Zoom and started chatting with each other about me in the chat box. They didn’t exclude me from it, so I saw everything. Luckily, it was all good things, but I didn’t like the unprofessionalism in that."

"This happened to me once! The feedback was generally very positive, but there were some technical questions I stumbled a bit on. I knew I did this during the interview, too, so it was a fairly good representation of how I thought I did. I did take a job there, and they definitely knew they accidentally sent it (and were mortified)! I brought it up regularly in good fun and likely during the in-person interview because that’s who I am."

For some, the “feedback” they got was even more outrageous than noting lackluster energy.

job hunting, job interview, interview tips, finding a job, job tips, finding a job "They put me on hold on Zoom and started chatting with each other about me in the chat box." media4.giphy.com

"This happened to me once, but the feedback was, 'She seems great, but has a HUGE gap in her teeth.' I can confirm I do have a gap in my front teeth, but it's similar to Madonna's. It was so bizarre. I sent a very snarky response back telling them that they should contact HR about a course in professionalism and asked to be withdrawn from the application process."

"I know someone who was immediately fired for accidentally sharing a notes document on interview candidates that had details about age relative to the other candidates. The candidate saw that the note about them said something like 'older.' They sued the company and won."

By and large, people suggested that the OP definitely use the information to their advantage, but advise against trying to get in with a company that would make such egregious offenses.

That said, the OP ended up getting their “dream job” before that second interview, so it’s probably all a dodged bullet.