Teachers reveal they taught hungry after mom cries over empty classroom
It's August, which means a lot of kids have either started school already or are heading back. The back-to-school month also means an influx of parents voicing their grievances on the internet. Everything from not wanting their children to share school supplies to the teacher's wish list items. What is typically an exciting time for children can be a stressful time for parents and teachers for different reasons.
One disappointed mom took to the internet in tears due to the lack of classroom decor in her child's classroom for "meet the teacher." It could be that this is the mom's first time sending a little one off to school, as to the reason she didn't know that there would likely be more decorating happening before the first day of school. Either way, her tearful reaction to the lack of decorations caused a few teachers to reveal the reality they face.
Overwhelmed with emotion.Photo credit: Canva
Most teachers, especially those of little ones, want to have their classrooms decked out in all the colorful, age-appropriate decor, but in reality, that costs money. Often, money neither teachers nor the school districts have. This is why public school teachers have wish lists that they pass out before the first day of school; some even create Amazon lists so people outside of their district can help. It's a pretty common understanding that teachers don't make a lot of money, but for some parents, just how little teachers make may be overlooked.
A teacher who goes by Mrs. Frazzled on social media recently reacted to the post of the crying mom. In this case, the teacher lived up to her social media moniker because what followed was more PG-13 than her usual content. Someone who goes by the name Kubi responded to Mrs. Frazzled's rant with an eye-opening reality, "My first year as a teacher I made 27K and my room was empty because I could[n't] afford to buy things for it. and I didn't even get my first check until 30 days in so I taught HUNGRY the first month."
Stressed at the desk, seeking a moment of calm.Photo credit: Canva
The confession prompted Mrs. Frazzled to commiserate with her own, revealing, "I also taught hungry my first year of teaching. That's part of why this whole thing made me so freaking mad. I'll tell you my story as a first-year teacher because it is not a unique story by any means, clearly."
She goes on to share that student teaching isn't paid and comes at the end of teaching certification, which requires soon-to-be-teachers to teach during the day for free, then attend classes at night. This essentially means there's no feasible way for student teachers to make enough money to cover living expenses unless they forego their sleep. Mrs. Frazzled says that in the spring of her student teaching, she had a major life event that resulted in her looking for a new place to live on virtually no income.
"On the heels of this happening, I'm starting my first year as a teacher. And you do not get paid for the first month that you teach, so nine months, no work. Summer, very minimal work. Then you start school, and you need to have a fully furnished and ready classroom, because if you've seen a government-sponsored classroom, you know it is very barren in there."
The woman reveals that she couldn't afford to live in the area where she taught, so her commute was anywhere from an hour to an hour and a half. She also confesses that the only reason she had anything in her classroom was because "parents kinda carried me on my back financially." They purchased the things she needed, including a big, colorful rug that can run well over $500.
Storytime circle with kids and teachers in the classroom.Photo credit: Canva
"My first month of teaching, I was so stinking poor. I had a mattress on the floor, no refrigerator. I had a couch that I dumpster dove for, and I was driving Postmates after school so that I could get like $12 to buy dinner or whatever. I remember crying because I needed Q-Tips and I couldn't afford Q-Tips. I had to go Postmates for hours to make enough to buy Q-Tips. This is the reality of teaching in the United States," Mrs. Frazzled shares.
It's a reality check that some parents may not be ready to hear when their expectations fall short of the reality teachers are living. Feeling disappointed when something doesn't meet your expectations is understandable, but when it comes to classroom decor and supplies, it takes a village.
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Communications expert shares the 7-word phrase to shoot down anyone being disrespectful
Try this method next time someone says something rude.
A woman can't believe what she just heard.
Getting caught off guard by a rude comment from a coworker, family member, or total stranger can throw you for a loop. You immediately start wondering how you should respond. Should I insult the person right back or play it cool without stooping to their level? Everyone is going to be thrown by a disrespectful comment at some point, so it’s good to have a response in your back pocket for that moment when it comes.
Communications expert Jefferson Fisher provided a great response that we can all use recently on the Mel Robbins Podcast. Fisher is a Texas board-certified personal injury attorney and one of the most respected voices on argumentation and communication in the world. He is also the bestselling author of The Next Conversation: Argue Less, Talk More.
How to respond to a rude or disrespectful comment
Fisher told Robbins that the first step in responding to the comment is nonverbal. You say nothing. “A lot of silence. So often, if you just wait 10 seconds that you're gonna add distance between what they said and how you're going to respond,” Fisher said. “They're saying this to get something out of you, cause in that moment, they're feeling something, whether it's a fear or an insecurity, whatever it is, you're not going to deliver on that same plane that they are.”
The next step is to let the rude person know that their behavior will not be tolerated in a confident manner.
“So somebody says something disrespectful, you give enough silence to make sure that it's a little awkward, and then you're going to say something to the effect of, ‘That's below my standard for a response.’ All of a sudden, you're now making it clear that what you just said was beneath me. And I don't respond to things that are beneath me in that way.”
Throw it back on them
If you prefer to put someone back on their heels instead of squelching the situation as Fisher recommends, John Bowe, a speech trainer, award-winning journalist, and author of I Have Something to Say: Mastering the Art of Public Speaking in the Age of DisconnectionI Have Something to Say: Mastering the Art of Public Speaking in the Age of Disconnection, says that you should respond with a question: “Do you really mean that?”
“Say it with outrage or dripping sarcasm, with raised eyebrows or deadpan calm. It doesn’t matter. This phrase is quietly disarming and deceptively powerful,” Bowe writes for CNBC. Bowe says the response does two great things for you. First, it gives them a chance to reconsider their words because most rude comments are said without thinking. “By responding with curiosity instead of defensiveness, you’re holding up a mirror. Often, that’s all it takes for the other person to walk back their offense,” he writes.
After the person is asked if they meant what they said, they can double down on their rude comment, but they are probably more likely to backpedal or apologize.
Unfortunately, it’s a fact of life that, unless you live under a rock, you’ll have to deal with people making rude comments. But the best thing you can do is to prepare yourself to confidently put someone in their place so they’ll think twice about ever being rude to you again.