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Woman with terminal brain tumor shares her truly inspiring outlook on finding meaning in life

"Pretty soon, all the beautiful days stacked up into a beautiful life."

Photo Credit: Amber Stratton

A woman is living her best life, despite terminal health issues.

Amber Stratton had her world turn upside down nearly five years ago. She was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer and she fought it with every tool in the proverbial medical tool box. After chemo and a double mastectomy, it remained—so she did it again, along with radiation, and was finally deemed cancer-free in early 2022.

That is until two months later when she was told she had a terminal brain tumor. Her prognosis? About two years to live. But there has been something inside of her, despite such a scary diagnosis, that drives her to grab every day and fill it up to the brim with joy. She lives each day as fully as she doubling down on wearing pink and going all in on motorsports.

Amber Stratton, brain tumor, living life, positive thinking, cancer Amber Stratton stays extremely active in the face of health issues. Phtoto Credit: Reddit, Amber Stratton

Upworthy first reached out to Stratton last November via Reddit after she posted "Yearly post, 3 years into terminal brain tumor. Beating the odds and loving life!" She (like many) didn't realize there was a direct messaging system on the site but responded just last week with the subject header, "I'm still alive, woo hoo!"

We had the honor of talking to her about how she's doing and, more specifically, how she has trained herself to live in a present state with true grace that makes all the past hardships and future prognoses seem blurry in comparison to the crystal clarity of what this exact moment holds.

Stratton encourages others facing similar battles on Reddit, in particular commenting on a post to someone struggling with positivity. She writes, "A friend of mine I met in a support group told me to just 'live a beautiful day and then another.'"

We asked her about this and she responded, "I started telling myself I wanted to live a beautiful day and then another and pretty soon all the beautiful days stacked up into a beautiful life."

She says this way of thinking anchors her. "It helped me focus on the day in front of me and not worry about the future or things outside of my control. And on those days, I told myself I would do something I loved, something for someone else, or learn something new each day. I gotta tell you that’s been a blast and I think a fun way to live."

When asked for specifics on the new things she's tried, Stratton reeled off a list of exciting ventures. "I started riding stand-up jet skis shortly after the brain tumor and fell in love. Then tried snowmobiles and got to build a vintage snowmobile with my husband this winter and race it on ice 100 miles, which was super fun. I plan to race this winter too. And I got into riding dirt bikes and rock climbing. My husband taught me to weld, which was challenging since I have vision loss, haha, but I’m getting the hang of it. And I bought a 1971 Chevy I’m learning to put an engine in. We’re doing an LS swap."

Amber Stratton, cancer, brain tumor, best life, gratitude. Amber Stratton poses with her Chevy truck and dog. Photo Credit: Amber Stratton

She also discusses how her diagnosis has helped her sift through what really matters: time and how we spend it. "I spent time traveling with my mom and fishing with my boys and… just living."

This doesn't mean she lacks awareness of what's going on in her body; her reality gives her perspective. "Cancer changes you and being aware that you're living with a ticking time bomb in your head gives you perspective. I have two boys who are now 7 and 9 and I want them to see me as someone who didn’t give up, no matter what the odds. And even if my body shuts down eventually, I won’t let the cancer take my spirit and who I am while I’m here. Then the cancer wins and I’m so much more than cancer. I’m going out living full and if I live a long time well, then heck yeah it will be an awesome ride!"

via TedxSydney / Flickr

This story originally appeared in 2018. Eddie Jaku recently passed away and so we are re-sharing his words of wisdom. The original story begins below.


It's a shame that many of us never truly appreciate what we have until it's gone. But this flaw seems to be hardwired into the human condition. We always long for what we don't have, instead of appreciating what we do.

Eddie Jaku, 101, has given himself the title of "happiest man on Earth" because, after living through the harrowing circumstances, he was able to appreciate what really matters in life.

On November 9, 1938, a night that would be forever known as Kristallnacht, or "the night of broken glass," Nazi forces burned synagogues and destroyed Jewish stores, homes, and property. So, Jaku, a Jewish teenager, living in Germany, returned home to an empty house.

The next day he was terrorized by Nazis, who shot his dog, and took him to Buchenwald concentration camp.


Eventually, he and his family would be taken to the most notorious Nazi camp. "I was finally transported to my hell on Earth, Auschwitz," Jaku said according to Today. "My parents and my sister were also transported to Auschwitz, and I was never to see my parents again."

In 1945, he was sent on a "death march" but escaped into the wilderness, surviving on snails and slugs until he was discovered by American forces.

The 'Happiest Man On Earth,' Shares His Wisdomwww.youtube.com

After the war, Jaku got married but still had a hard time shedding his painful past. However, after having his first son, he went through a powerful transformation.

Becoming a father inspired him to make a pledge that he's kept to this day. "I made the promise that on that day, until the end of my life, I promised to be happy, smile, be polite, helpful, and kind. I also promised to never put my foot on German soil again," he said in a 2019 TED Talk. "Today, I stand in front of you, a man who has kept all of those promises."

Jaku also came to the realization that he will never truly be happy as long as there is hate in his heart. "Hate is a disease that may destroy your enemy, but will also destroy you in the process," Jaku said.

As someone who lost a lot of family in the Holocaust, he derives an incredible amount of joy from his marriage, children, and grandchildren. He wants everyone to know that happiness is all about living in the now and embracing what you have, instead of waiting for happiness to come around the corner.

The happiest man on earth: 99 year old Holocaust survivor shares his story | Eddie Jaku | TEDxSydneywww.youtube.com

"Today I teach and share happiness with everyone I meet. Happiness does not fall from the sky, it's in your hands," he said.

"Tomorrow will come, but first enjoy today," he added.

"For me, when I wake up, I am happy because it is another day to enjoy," he said. "When I remember that I should have died a miserable death, but instead I'm alive, so I aim to help people who are down."

Jaku's wisdom is especially important as we recover from the COVID-19 pandemic. Many of us who haven't lived through traumatic events now know what it's like to be disconnected from the things that really matter.

Hopefully, the positive lesson we can all take from the pandemic is to appreciate the simple things we couldn't do such as hugging a parent or spending time with friends. It's also a reason to appreciate your health.

"If you are healthy, you're a multimillionaire," Jaku said.

Jaku wants to remind people that there's nothing better than being a friend.

"Remember these words," he concluded his TED Talk. "Please do not walk in front of me, I may not be able to follow. Please do not walk behind me, I may not be able to lead. Just walk beside me and be my friend."

Margaret Marshall and Rachael Kauffung have found a delightful way of dealing with all the negative news from the past 12 to 18 months.

The two friends, who first met as co-workers at Amazon, have a major yen for games of all kinds and began holding weekly game nights as a way to de-stress.

In looking for new games to play, however, they noticed a lack of options that left everyone feeling good at the end of the night. Popular indie card game Cards Against Humanity brands itself "the party game for horrible people" while other games like Risk or Monopoly pit players against each other. Even games like Pandemic that require player collaboration to win can be kind of a downer at a time when Zika and Ebola have been part of the global conversation.


So the friends created a brand new game, one designed to make people feel good.

They called it Sway: A Game of Debate and Silver Linings.

Unlike other games, where players weigh worst-case scenarios or fight over hypothetical boardwalks while trying not to go broke or land in jail, players win Sway through the power of positive thinking.

Photo via Sway, used with permission.

In each round of the game, players go head-to-head in 30-second debates on various topics (both silly and serious) and win if they can “sway” the judge for the round. The twist? Players can only use positive arguments.

Oh, and occasionally players are challenged to present their arguments in Scottish accents or while doing a challenging yoga pose to get extra points. And when you win, you do a happy dance.

Just kidding. Dancing is totally optional. Photo via Sway creators, used with permission.

In the spirit of positivity and silver linings, Kauffung and Marshall have also decided to donate part of the game's profits to a charitable cause.

Image via B+ Foundation.

Kauffung's father, who recently lost his own battle with cancer, had always been passionate about fighting pediatric cancer. So for every game purchased, Silver Linings Games (the company that makes Sway) will donate $1 to B+ Foundation, an organization that supports families of kids with cancer.

Marshall and Kauffung hope playing Sway helps people remember that there's more to life than winning or being right — and that there's a silver lining to everything.

"[Sway is] not about winning or being right," Marshall and Kauffung explain in an email. "It's about silliness and silver linings and having a good time with people you care about (even if you disagree with them)."

As someone who recently played Sway for the first time, I can honestly say it's super easy to learn, definitely challenging, and filled with unexpected hilarity. It's a great way to dissolve tensions that may have built up between families and friends without letting competitive gameplay bring out the worst in you.

Not to mention, there was a study conducted at the University of North Carolina that found consistent positive thinking can make you happier, healthier, and more productive.

Photo via Sway creators, used with permission.

Whatever your way of reflecting on the positive things in life may be, it's important to remember how many reasons you have to laugh, cheer, and embrace the people around you. After all, it's hard to be mad when you're watching your friend try to explain the benefits of arachnophobia in a thick Boston accent — because that is not easy, but it is hilarious.

Want to learn more? Here's a fun video from the creators about Sway:

"You never say yes to anything."

These six words, uttered by Shonda Rhimes' older sister in 2013, open up the famous showrunner's new bestselling book, "Year of Yes." And they set Rhimes on a journey to say "yes" to everything that she could for one whole year.

In the process, she had some freeing and hilarious unforgettable experiences, lost over 100 pounds, and overcame her biggest fears. In short, she emerged a bold, happier person. And now she's sharing how.



Photo by Stephen Lovekin/Getty Images.

The book, which takes us on her "year of yes" journey, is chock-full of touching stories, personal revelations, and, of course, Shonda's characteristically authentic, no-holds barred witty prose with phrases like "Chicken bone, Janet Jackson boob fear-snot, y'all." (The book is worth a read simply for the story that goes along with that phrase.)

But most importantly, she shares some empowering lessons that should make any ambitious, driven woman stand up and say, "Yes!!!"

Here are five of my favorites:

1. "Ditch the dream. Be a doer, not a dreamer."

We're all told to have dreams. And not just any dreams — big dreams. HUGE dreams. We're told that dreaming those big dreams will somehow set us on a path to fulfill them. But Shonda calls foul on that thinking.

Dreamers, she says, spend their time looking up at the sky and making plans and talking and, well, dreaming. The doers are the ones who actually get about to the business of working, creating, and trying things and therefore getting things done and ending up more successful than they could have imagined.

Her own success as a game-changing TV writer and showrunner, for example, she says, "never would have happened if I hadn't stopped dreaming of becoming [Toni Morrison] and gotten busy becoming myself."

Shonda shared this lesson during the first big "yes" of her year: overcoming her fear of public speaking and agreeing to give the commencement speech at Dartmouth College. You can listen to it in full here:

2. "Wanna play?"

This is a simple lesson but one that is easy to forget in the fast-paced and stressful day-to-day life that many of us live: It's OK to play.

She says it's OK to stop and take 15 minutes to roll on the floor with her daughter or take a bubble bath and drink a glass of wine or just generally have some fun.

In order to make this happen, you may have to say no to some other things like answering email after work, being on time to an event, or meeting an unrealistic deadline. But the joy you get from indulging in a bit of pleasure every now and then will far outweigh the perceived losses.

Says Rhimes: "This 'Yes' is about giving yourself the permission to shift the focus of what is a priority from what's good for you over to what makes you feel good."

3. "It never ever helps to think that Whitney Houston's hairdo is real."

When Shonda was a teenager, she says wanted nothing more than to have her hair look like Whitney Houston's. She spent many frustrating mornings with curling irons and cans of hair spray only to find that her hair still did not look like Whitney's.

Then, one day, as an adult, she discovered that the fabulous Ms. Houston hair that she failed to achieve all those years was a wig. Mind blown.


Photo via Mark Kettenhofen/Wikimedia Commons.

Shonda uses this story to explain why she is so open about having a nanny.

As a mother who the world thinks "does it all," Rhimes says it is important to show the world that she doesn't do it all. She has help. The snacks she brings to her kid's school are store-bought, not homemade. She is constantly making tradeoffs to make things work. No matter how perfect her life may look, it isn't. Her life, her nanny, her store-bought snacks, they're all just like Whitney's wig.

When we stop feeling inadequate and stop comparing ourselves to ideals that may not even be real, we'll all be a lot happier.

4. "Thank you. Smile. Shut up."

This is Shonda's three-step process for accepting a compliment.

In her "Year of Yes," she practiced over and over to no longer do that self-deprecating, praise-rejection thing that so many women do. Instead, she learned to fully accept and receive praise. To help herself, she asked whether or not Wonder Woman, Serena Williams, or Beyoncé really doubt their greatness or feel bad about being told how "badass" they are. Probably not.

So while you may not be Wonder Woman or Beyoncé, if you are striving for greatness and doing the best that you absolutely can, you have to be OK with being better than everyone else sometimes.

Let that sink in for a second.

Not better as in an arrogant, "I matter more than you," existential sense but better at doing whatever it is that you do. Own your greatness. Own your expertise. And when someone compliments the thing you worked hard to achieve or be, just say thank you, smile, and shut up. Eventually, it'll start to feel good.

5. "Be the narrator of your own story."

As a writer, Shonda knows a thing or two about how to tell a good story. But with so many narratives about who and what a woman "should be" in regard to age, career, relationship status, and so many other expectations, it's hard sometimes to remember that you have the right to be the ultimate narrator of your own story.

In "Year of Yes," Rhimes gets personal and talks about the experience that finally empowered her to admit that she doesn't want to get married. She never has and, as far as she knows now, never will. And that's OK. It is just one of many truths that she began to realize she had to embrace and own in order to write her own life story.


She had to finally say "yes" to who she is.

Saying yes to who we really are and not allowing narratives constructed by others to dictate how we feel and what we do is essential to living a life of freedom and fulfillment.

This is just a taste of the advice Rhimes gives in "Year of Yes."

Now, of course, we don't all have the funds and resources to say yes to every opportunity that comes along, but the overall message of the book goes beyond financial limits.

Rhimes encourages us to acknowledge what is right for each of us and what empowers us to push past our fears, embrace our greatness, and do the things that will add meaning and value to our lives.

Who wouldn't want to say yes to that? Not just for 365 days, but for forever? I'm pretty sure that's exactly what Shonda has in mind.