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Marine Corps Master Sergeant gave his son an emotional first salute as a commissioned officer

Marine Corps Master Sergeant gave his son an emotional first salute as a commissioned officer
Mike Fisher/TikTok

There are moments as a parent that stand out, and there are moments as a human that stand out, and when those two realities converge, it makes for pure magic.

One such magical moment was captured and shared on TikTok and has been viewed by millions in just one day.

Master Sergeant Michael Fisher is an instructor with the Marine Corps Junior ROTC program. He has spent the past nine months sharing sweet videos on Tik Tok of himself and his adorable 1-year-old granddaughter, Abby, but yesterday he shared something completely different. In his official role as Master Sergeant, Fisher gave his son his first salute as a Second Lieutenant.

And as he explained the pride he felt, the emotion in his voice took us straight to his heart.

"I've watched you grow and mature and become the man that you are today," he said. "You have always been respectful, by saying 'Yes sir.' 'No sir.' 'Yes, ma'am.' And 'No, ma'am.' A salute is a sign of respect. It is a privilege to render you your first salute."

He raised his hand in salute, then added, his voice cracking, "But it is a greater honor to say 'Congratulations, sir, on your commissioning.'"

@e8msgt

Rendering my son his 1st Salute! #marine #2ndLT #usmc #fatherson #fyp #military #instructor

The moment was clearly significant for this father and son for personal reasons, but it was also significant that it took place between a Black officer and non-commissioned officer.

Though racial diversity is fairly representative of the general population in lower officer ranks of the military, the upper ranks are lacking in such diversity. In fact, the higher in pay grade you go, the more white the demographics become.

As this chart from the Defense Department shows, at the top of the pay grade for active enlistment officers, 92% are white and 5% are Black.

defense.gov


For the reserves, the trend is similar, with white officers making up a disproportionate percentage of the top pay grades.

defense.gov

As Master Sergeant, Michael Fisher is an upper-ranked non-commissioned officer. His son's rank of Second Lieutenant is the first commissioned officer ranking. (This site has a breakdown of how the rankings work, and what the letters below the bars on the chart mean.)

The Defense Department's own report acknowledges that racial minorities are underrepresented in both senior non-commissioned officer ranks and as well as higher commissioned officer ranks. The report also explains why that's a problem:

"Appropriate representation of minorities in military leadership positions is increasingly important in the context of the nation's demographic trends. The non-Hispanic White population is expected to decline from 199 million in 2020 to 179 million in 2060, while the rest of the U.S. population continues to grow. The population of people who are two or more races is projected to be the single fastest-growing racial or ethnic group, followed by Asian and Hispanic Americans. Thus, if military leaders are to mirror the racial and ethnic composition of the Service members they lead and the American public they serve, DoD must ensure that all Service members have access to opportunities to succeed and advance into leadership positions."

Here's hoping this new Second Lieutenant will have every opportunity to rise in the officer ranks, if he so chooses.

Meanwhile, we'll watch this video a few more times and just for the feels. There's something about someone in uniform in a formal situation trying to hold it together that just tugs at the heartstrings every time. And seeing this career military man honoring his son with his first salute as an officer—and hearing his voice break as he does so—it's just so touching.

Thank you, Master Sergeant Fisher and Second Lieutenant son, for your dutiful service.

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Underpaid teachers reveal they taught while hungry after mom cries over undecorated classroom

"My 1st year I made 27K and my room was empty."

Photo credit: Canva

Teachers reveal they taught hungry after mom cries over empty classroom

It's August, which means a lot of kids have either started school already or are heading back. The back-to-school month also means an influx of parents voicing their grievances on the internet. Everything from not wanting their children to share school supplies to the teacher's wish list items. What is typically an exciting time for children can be a stressful time for parents and teachers for different reasons.

One disappointed mom took to the internet in tears due to the lack of classroom decor in her child's classroom for "meet the teacher." It could be that this is the mom's first time sending a little one off to school, as to the reason she didn't know that there would likely be more decorating happening before the first day of school. Either way, her tearful reaction to the lack of decorations caused a few teachers to reveal the reality they face.

teacher; teacher pay; low pay; teachers; mom cries; undecorated classroom; back to school Overwhelmed with emotion.Photo credit: Canva

Most teachers, especially those of little ones, want to have their classrooms decked out in all the colorful, age-appropriate decor, but in reality, that costs money. Often, money neither teachers nor the school districts have. This is why public school teachers have wish lists that they pass out before the first day of school; some even create Amazon lists so people outside of their district can help. It's a pretty common understanding that teachers don't make a lot of money, but for some parents, just how little teachers make may be overlooked.

A teacher who goes by Mrs. Frazzled on social media recently reacted to the post of the crying mom. In this case, the teacher lived up to her social media moniker because what followed was more PG-13 than her usual content. Someone who goes by the name Kubi responded to Mrs. Frazzled's rant with an eye-opening reality, "My first year as a teacher I made 27K and my room was empty because I could[n't] afford to buy things for it. and I didn't even get my first check until 30 days in so I taught HUNGRY the first month."

teacher; teacher pay; low pay; teachers; mom cries; undecorated classroom; back to school Stressed at the desk, seeking a moment of calm.Photo credit: Canva

The confession prompted Mrs. Frazzled to commiserate with her own, revealing, "I also taught hungry my first year of teaching. That's part of why this whole thing made me so freaking mad. I'll tell you my story as a first-year teacher because it is not a unique story by any means, clearly."

She goes on to share that student teaching isn't paid and comes at the end of teaching certification, which requires soon-to-be-teachers to teach during the day for free, then attend classes at night. This essentially means there's no feasible way for student teachers to make enough money to cover living expenses unless they forego their sleep. Mrs. Frazzled says that in the spring of her student teaching, she had a major life event that resulted in her looking for a new place to live on virtually no income.

@mrs.frazzled Replying to @Kubi ♬ original sound - frazz

"On the heels of this happening, I'm starting my first year as a teacher. And you do not get paid for the first month that you teach, so nine months, no work. Summer, very minimal work. Then you start school, and you need to have a fully furnished and ready classroom, because if you've seen a government-sponsored classroom, you know it is very barren in there."

The woman reveals that she couldn't afford to live in the area where she taught, so her commute was anywhere from an hour to an hour and a half. She also confesses that the only reason she had anything in her classroom was because "parents kinda carried me on my back financially." They purchased the things she needed, including a big, colorful rug that can run well over $500.

teacher; teacher pay; low pay; teachers; mom cries; undecorated classroom; back to school Storytime circle with kids and teachers in the classroom.Photo credit: Canva

"My first month of teaching, I was so stinking poor. I had a mattress on the floor, no refrigerator. I had a couch that I dumpster dove for, and I was driving Postmates after school so that I could get like $12 to buy dinner or whatever. I remember crying because I needed Q-Tips and I couldn't afford Q-Tips. I had to go Postmates for hours to make enough to buy Q-Tips. This is the reality of teaching in the United States," Mrs. Frazzled shares.

It's a reality check that some parents may not be ready to hear when their expectations fall short of the reality teachers are living. Feeling disappointed when something doesn't meet your expectations is understandable, but when it comes to classroom decor and supplies, it takes a village.

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Woman shares her therapist's incredibly helpful mental health hack: 'Run the dishwasher twice'

The advice sounds strange, but it's brilliant.

Achim Thiemermann from Pixabay, Natasha G from Pixabay, Danielle Wunker/Facebook

Dirty dishes and clean dishes.

"Run the dishwasher twice" might sound like strange mental health advice, but a viral post is proving that it's actually quite helpful.

Danielle Wunker, a Licensed Professional Counselor and Supervisor, shared a story on her Facebook page that is resonating with people who struggle with mental health issues. It originally came from an answer from Katie Scott on Quora to the question "Has a therapist ever told you something completely unexpected?"

It reads:

"When I was at one of my lowest (mental) points in life, I couldn't get out of bed some days. I had no energy or motivation and was barely getting by. I had therapy once per week, and on this particular week I didn't have much to 'bring' to the session. He asked how my week was and I really had nothing to say.

'What are you struggling with?' he asked. I gestured around me and said 'I dunno man. Life.' Not satisfied with my answer, he said 'No, what exactly are you worried about right now? What feels overwhelming? When you go home after this session, what issue will be staring at you?'

upset man, stressed man, unhappy man, man alone, anxiety Man sitting on chair covering his eyes.Photo by christopher lemercier on Unsplash


I knew the answer, but it was so ridiculous that I didn't want to say it. I wanted to have something more substantial.
Something more profound.

But I didn't.

So I told him, 'Honestly? The dishes. It's stupid, I know, but the more I look at them the more I CAN'T do them because I'll have to scrub them before I put them in the dishwasher, because the dishwasher sucks, and I just can't stand and scrub the dishes.'

I felt like an idiot even saying it.

What kind of grown ass woman is undone by a stack of dishes? There are people out there with *actual* problems, and I'm whining to my therapist about dishes?

But he nodded in understanding and then said:

'Run the dishwasher twice.'


dishes, dish washer, plates, pots, pans, glasses Dishwasher and dishes.via commons.wikimedia.org

I began to tell him that you're not supposed to, but he stopped me.

'Why the hell aren't you supposed to? If you don't want to scrub the dishes and your dishwasher sucks, run it twice. Run it three times, who cares?! Rules do not exist.'

It blew my mind in a way that I don't think I can properly express. That day, I went home and tossed my smelly dishes haphazardly into the dishwasher and ran it three times. I felt like I had conquered a dragon.

The next day, I took a shower lying down. A few days later. I folded my laundry and put them wherever the f**k they fit. There were no longer arbitrary rules I had to follow, and it gave me the freedom to make accomplishments again. Now that I'm in a healthier place, I rinse off my dishes and put them in the dishwasher properly. I shower standing up. I sort my laundry.

But at a time when living was a struggle instead of a blessing, I learned an incredibly important lesson:

There are no rules.

Run the dishwasher twice."

washing dishes, dish washer, woman doing dishes, sink A woman washing dishes.via Canva/Photos

"For me it is not exactly that there are no rules, but I ask myself 'Whose rules are these?' 'Do I want them to be mine or can I come up with better ones?' No rules might work for some folks, but I like a little structure, the structure I supply and can alter if it is not working." Sam wrote in the comments.

"That is brilliant! Thank you for sharing that profound story. Isn’t it amazing how often we miss the faulty assumption that is stymying us? I’m glad to hear you are in a much better place now," Charlie added.

Anyone who has been in a mental or emotional place where even just the most basic, mundane tasks seem overwhelming understands the wisdom in this lesson. Dishes might seem like such a minor detail of life, but those kinds of minor details can be the straw that breaks the camel's back mentally. If you've never stared at a basket of laundry that would take three minutes to fold and thought, "Nope, can't do it. Not now. Maybe not ever..." then you may not need this lesson, but there are millions of people who appreciate the express permission to let go of the rules in our heads about how things have to be done.

Adjusting expectations and arbitrary ideas about how something works is incredibly freeing and can provide a seemingly temporary fix for a seemingly insurmountable problem. Oddly enough, though, that temporary fix can be the necessary bridge that gets someone from unable to cope with daily life things to functioning on a somewhat normal level.

Mental health is such a tricky thing to manage, and many of the tools for managing it run counter to what we might expect. That's what therapists are for—to help us step outside the box of our own brains, adjust our thoughts and behaviors to create greater possibilities for ourselves, and give us permission to reject the negative voices in our head try to keep us locked in unhelpful or unhealthy patterns.

Even when that unhelpful pattern is as simple as letting the dishes pile up instead of running the dishwasher twice.

This article originally appeared four years ago.

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Woman gives stray cat the most Gen X name ever, and her friend can't stand it

As if?

via Canva/Photos

A woman making a "loser" sign and a shocked cat.

There are no hard-set rules for naming a cat, but if you want to follow the current trends, give them a cute-sounding human name. Over the past two years, the top five most popular cat names have been Luna, followed by Charlie, Lucy, Bella, and Leo.

No matter what type of name it is, it can also be hard to settle on one for a new cat because it’s what you’ll be calling out for the next 12-plus years. What if you name the cat Jerry, but it acts like a Sebastian or a Michael? Then what will you do? Two friends got into a spat over naming a cat, with the new owner rejecting their friend’s suggestions in favor of a term popular among Gen Xers in the ‘80s and ‘90s.


“I found a little stray cat in front of the grocery store. Super friendly but skinny and obviously abandoned,” A Redditor with the username SpecialEggSalad wrote. “My friend was with me and kept throwing out names. I didn’t like any of them. It was Ross, Beck, Tucker, Zorro… I asked her to just chill. She was getting worked up and kept asking if she could have the kitten. [It’s] My kitty. Anyway, after 20 minutes of her, just suggesting endless amounts of names…She got mad and said, ‘Fine, call him whatever you want.’ So now the cat's name is WHATEVER.”


When SpecialEggSlad announced the cat’s name, her friend “turned red in the face and she was about to cry.” It could be that the friend hated the feeling of rejection, but if she grew up in the ‘80s or ‘90s, she’d understand that being on the receiving end of a “whatever” was quite the insult.

What did 'whatever' mean to Gen X?

You see, Gen Xers were known for having an aloof attitude because, in those days, caring too much about anything was totally uncool. So whatever was more than a catchphrase was a way of life. The term became popular in the early ‘80s when Valley Girl speak expanded from Los Angeles to the world. But what began as innocuous slang evolved into something more nihilistic. In Nirvana’s breakout 1991 anthem, Smells Like Teen Spirit, where Kurt Cobain ditches any attempt at making a point in the song by singing, “Oh well, whatever, never mind.” Whatever was a way of distancing yourself from the powers-that-be, whether it was political, religious, corporate, or the media.


The term was also part of ‘90s hand-gesture culture, where people would call someone a loser by making an L with their index and middle fingers and placing it on their forehead. In Clueless, the affluent teens used two hands to merge the double Ls into a W, to signal “whatever,” with a double loser casher. Business Insider’s Emily Stewart notes that Gen X’s attitude comes from being raised as the least parented generation in recent memory. “Gen X's ‘whatever’ attitude has translated to a society that's perpetually a little ‘whatever’ about them,” she wrote.


It may be a knock on Gen Xers that they were once so nihilistic that they rallied around the term whatever, but it’s also a sign of knowing what’s important. A lot is going on in the world, and we only have so many Fs to give; it’s best to hand them out to the people who deserve them. Because when you care about everything, it’s hard to truly care about anything.

In the Reddit post, SpecialEggSlad faced criticism from commenters for naming her cat Whatever, which made it look like she didn’t care about the animal. Realizing this, she changed the cat’s name to Peekaboo. Let’s just hope the kitty grows into its name and isn’t a cat that refuses to hide, even if given an incredibly cozy cardboard box.

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Communications expert shares the 7-word phrase to shoot down anyone being disrespectful

Try this method next time someone says something rude.

via Canva/Photos

A woman can't believe what she just heard.

Getting caught off guard by a rude comment from a coworker, family member, or total stranger can throw you for a loop. You immediately start wondering how you should respond. Should I insult the person right back or play it cool without stooping to their level? Everyone is going to be thrown by a disrespectful comment at some point, so it’s good to have a response in your back pocket for that moment when it comes.

Communications expert Jefferson Fisher provided a great response that we can all use recently on the Mel Robbins Podcast. Fisher is a Texas board-certified personal injury attorney and one of the most respected voices on argumentation and communication in the world. He is also the bestselling author of The Next Conversation: Argue Less, Talk More.

@melrobbins

If you've ever wondered if there's a correct way to respond to disrespect, try out this method from lawyer and communication expert, @Jefferson Fisher. Check out this episode of The Mel Robbins Podcast, for more communication tips from Jefferson! 🎧 “How To Handle Difficult People & Take Back Your Peace and Power.” #melrobbins #melrobbinspodcast #communicationtips #dealingwithdisrespect

How to respond to a rude or disrespectful comment

Fisher told Robbins that the first step in responding to the comment is nonverbal. You say nothing. “A lot of silence. So often, if you just wait 10 seconds that you're gonna add distance between what they said and how you're going to respond,” Fisher said. “They're saying this to get something out of you, cause in that moment, they're feeling something, whether it's a fear or an insecurity, whatever it is, you're not going to deliver on that same plane that they are.”

The next step is to let the rude person know that their behavior will not be tolerated in a confident manner.

“So somebody says something disrespectful, you give enough silence to make sure that it's a little awkward, and then you're going to say something to the effect of, ‘That's below my standard for a response.’ All of a sudden, you're now making it clear that what you just said was beneath me. And I don't respond to things that are beneath me in that way.”

disrespect, rude communications, social skills, silence, how to respond, bad comment A woman covering her mouth.via Canva/Photos

Throw it back on them

If you prefer to put someone back on their heels instead of squelching the situation as Fisher recommends, John Bowe, a speech trainer, award-winning journalist, and author of I Have Something to Say: Mastering the Art of Public Speaking in the Age of DisconnectionI Have Something to Say: Mastering the Art of Public Speaking in the Age of Disconnection, says that you should respond with a question: “Do you really mean that?”

“Say it with outrage or dripping sarcasm, with raised eyebrows or deadpan calm. It doesn’t matter. This phrase is quietly disarming and deceptively powerful,” Bowe writes for CNBC. Bowe says the response does two great things for you. First, it gives them a chance to reconsider their words because most rude comments are said without thinking. “By responding with curiosity instead of defensiveness, you’re holding up a mirror. Often, that’s all it takes for the other person to walk back their offense,” he writes.


After the person is asked if they meant what they said, they can double down on their rude comment, but they are probably more likely to backpedal or apologize.

Unfortunately, it’s a fact of life that, unless you live under a rock, you’ll have to deal with people making rude comments. But the best thing you can do is to prepare yourself to confidently put someone in their place so they’ll think twice about ever being rude to you again.

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'Anchors aweigh' vs. 'anchor's away' and 9 other idioms most of us get completely wrong

Wait, it's "toe the line," not "tow the line"?

Photo credit: Canva

So many idioms are different than people think.

Before diving into this article, please be warned that it might rock your world in an "everything I thought I knew was a lie" kind of way. Being humbled by the dictionary can be a little disconcerting, especially when you're someone who was sure they had a solid grasp of the English language...but it's okay. We'll get through this together.

In fact, let me preemptively ease any blow to your ego. I'm both a former English teacher and a professional writer. I know my way around grammar and spelling and figures of speech. If anyone should know idioms, it's me, but alas, I recently discovered that some common phrases aren't what I thought they were. So if you find yourself in the same boat as we go through this list, you're in good company.

It all started one day when Merriam-Webster woke up and chose violence on X, blowing people's minds by casually correcting several idioms most of us get wrong. Rude? Yes. Informative? Also yes.

But there are even more where those came from. Here are 10 idioms most of us get wrong along with their correct versions and how they came to be in the first place:

"Anchor's away!" is actually "Anchors aweigh."

For my entire life on this planet, I have 100% assumed it was the former. Makes sense, right? You take the anchor away and the boat can move. But nope, the correct term, "aweigh," comes from the nautical term "weighing anchor," which means taking up the anchor so a ship can launch. Those of us who aren't sailors may not be aware that "weigh" even has that definition, but it does: "to heave up (an anchor) preparatory to sailing."

anchor, anchor's away, anchors aweigh, nautical terms, idioms Anchors aweigh! Photo credit: Canva

"Another thing coming" is actually "another think coming."

"If he thinks he's going to be able to swindle me like that, he's got another thing coming." Technically, no he doesn't. He's got another think coming. However, Merriam-Webster gives us a mulligan on this one, despite "think" coming first from our British friends. So many Americans have started saying "thing," the dictionary gods now accept both as okay.

"Bury the lead" is actually "bury the lede."

If you take a while to get to the important point of a story, you might be accused of burying the lede. The word "lead" may seem to make perfect sense here, because it's the lead part of the story that you're burying. But "lede" is the word for an introductory paragraph in an article. What makes this one extra confusing, however, is that "lede" is actually a deliberate misspelling of "lead," to differentiate the lead paragraph from the "lead" strip of metal that used to separate lines of type. So lede still means lead, but it's spelled lede. Just go with it.

case in point, case and point, idioms, big bang theory, English Case in point, not case and point. Giphy

"Case and point" is actually "case in point."

It's understandable that someone might think this one is "case and point," like you've made your case and your point at the same time with a perfect example. But it's really "case in point." The phrase "in point" comes from Old English and means "pertinent" or "appropriate." So by citing a pertinent example, you are providing a case that is relevant.

"Eek out" is actually "eke out."

This one hurts me personally. I desperately want it to be "eek," like I imagine air "eeking" out of a balloon when you pull the opening tightly—slowly and with great effort. But nope. Eke it is, meaning "to get with great difficulty." Fine, whatever.

horse, reins, horseback riding, free rein, idioms I've been through the desert on a horse with free rein.Photo credit: Canva

"Free reign" is actually "free rein."

If you've always imagined this phrase as referring to a powerful reigning ruler who does whatever they want, you're not alone. You're also not correct. "Free rein" goes way back to the days of ubiquitous horsemanship and refers to letting the reins go so the horse can go where it pleases.

"Phased/Unphased" is actually "fazed/unfazed."

I find this one to be kind of fun, actually. We don't have enough words that use "z" in them, and this homonym feels like you're breaking two different spelling rules at the same time, even though you're not. "Despite discovering she'd spelling idioms wrong all her life, she was unfazed by this article." See? So fun.

shoo, shoo-in, shoe-in, idioms, English Buzz Off Get Away GIF Giphy

"Shoe-in" is actually "shoo-in."

Honestly, some of these idioms are ones we may have never seen written and just assumed they were spelled a certain way. "He was a shoo-in for the position." Not a shoe-in. Shoo-in also has some horsey origins, referring originally to cheating in a horse race. Now it just means to be certain of success.

"Slight of hand" is actually "sleight of hand."

Yeah, this is another one that gets people. It feels right to write "slight," as in the slight movements of the hand that enable someone to trick us. But no, it's "sleight" (still pronounced the same), which means "deceitful craftiness" or "dexterity/skill." Makes sense.

toe the line, race, running, starting line, idioms "Toe the line" literally means put your toe on the line.Photo credit: Canva

"Tow the line" is actually "Toe the line."

This one admittedly got me. I always picture people towing a boat by a rope, all lined up and working in unison toward the same goal. But that's not it at all. It's "toe the line," meaning to line up with your toes along the line at the start of a race.

There, don't we all feel a little smarter now? What's better is there's even a term for these incorrect terms: eggcorn. An eggcorn is "a word or phrase that results from a mishearing or misinterpretation of another." Apparently, a woman heard "acorn" and spelled it "eggcorn," and a whole new term was born. Isn't language fun?

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