Therapist explains how the viral 'dopamine anchoring' can be the best hack for conquering chores

There are two types of people in this world: people who impulse buy and people with superhuman willpower.

Does this sound familiar? You’re tapping through Instagram stories, and it appears. A cropped t-shirt starring Hello Kitty as a teeny, kitten-sized tomato, ripe and still on the vine. It’s the crop top of your dreams.

Or is it? Perhaps the fact that it’s currently 2 a.m. and the melatonin you took 15 minutes ago is starting to whisper things like “Buy it,” or “You need that shirt,” to you—not kismet.

(Spoiler alert: it’s the latter.)

You must resist the urge to impulse buy. Credit: www.sanrio.com

Here’s the thing: 84% of us have been there. We’ve all made purchases that seemed brilliant at midnight and embarrassing by morning. In fact, 40% of all e-commerce spending comes from spontaneous snap purchases.

But what if I told you that buyer’s remorse, or impulse buying, could be eliminated with a single rule that requires zero brain power?

Say hello to the 30/30 rule, a surprisingly simple technique that’s helping millions of people break the impulse-buying cycle and mend their relationship with money.

Meet the guys who figured it out

Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus were your classic American success disasters. After enduring tough childhoods—each scarred by an unstable home life and substance abuse—they climbed up the corporate ladder, and at just 28, had made it.

Millburn became the youngest director in his company’s 140-year history, expertly managing 150 retail stores. Meanwhile, Nicodermus thrived in sales and marketing. With substantial six-figure salaries, they indulged their every whim, fancy, and desire. Luxury cars, designer wardrobes, flashy watches that cost more than most single-family homes. This was the life, right?

Nope.

They were also miserable, drowning in debt, and working 80-hour weeks.

- YouTube Credit: www.youtube.com

The wake-up call came in 2009 when Millburn’s mom died of lung cancer and his marriage fell apart in the same month. While going through his mother’s house,, he donated everything instead of renting a storage unit for her belongings. He let go.

This was the moment that changed everything.

Nicodermus saw the profound changes Millburn experienced after finding minimalism, then started his own journey. Inspired by minimalist bloggers like Colin Wright, Leo Babauta, and Joshua Becker, the two launched The Minimalists.

At the time, the website provided them an outlet to document their transformation and give tips to people on how to live more intentionally. Since then, they’ve published bestselling books on minimalism, produced multiple Emmy-nominated Netflix documentaries, and built a worldwide community of millions of people seeking a way out of compulsive consumption.

The 30/30 rule (it’s delightfully simple)

Ready for this earth-shattering revelation? If something costs more than $30, wait 30 hours before buying it. If it’s over $100, wait 30 days.

Is that it?

Yep. No apps that track your spending, no complicated budgeting spreadsheets, no vision boards, or empty promises to yourself that you’ll “do better next time.”

A man who didn't use the 30/30 rule. Photo credit: Canva

Also called the “Wait for It Rule,” this deliberate delay creates space between the initial impulse to buy and the actual purchase.

“If something I want costs more than $30, I ask myself whether I can get by without it for the next 30 hours,” Millburn explains. “This extra time helps me assess whether or not this new thing will add value to my life.”

Of course, there are caveats. This rule only applies to non-essential items, including decorations, clothing, games, cosmetics, and gadgets. Groceries, cleaning supplies, and life requirements don’t count. Go ahead and buy that toilet paper.

Why it works, from a psychological standpoint

Here’s what is going on in your brain: 95% of purchase decisions happen subconsciously, often driven by emotional states rather than logical reasoning. It’s like that Ariana Grande song, “7 Rings.”

“I see it, I like it, I want it, I got it,” she sings.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

When we see something we want, our brain’s reward center (the limbic system) floods with dopamine before our logical brain even shows up to the party. How convenient.

“Early research suggests that stress exposure influences basic neural circuits involved in reward processing and learning while also biasing decisions towards habit and modulating our propensity to engage in risk-taking,” explains Anthony J. Porcelli and Mauricio R. Delagado in their landmark research paper, “Stress and Decision Making: Effects on Valuation, Learning, and Risk-taking.”

The 30/30 rule basically forces your brain to experience something it despises: delayed gratification. It’s the ability to resist immediate rewards for larger, long-term gratification. By not acting on impulse, your prefrontal cortex (the responsible adult part of your brain) has a moment to chat with the limbic system (the reward center, which is acting like an impulsive toddler with a credit card).

Whether it’s days or hours, a few important things happen during this wind-down period.

• Emotional cooling, and the initial excitement fades.
• Value assessment, in which you have the time to genuinely evaluate whether or not this item will add something meaningful to your life.
• Pattern recognition, a.k.a. the “Aha!” moment. You recognize that the purchase was triggered by stress, boredom, or Instagram, and build greater self-awareness.

The bigger picture

No one is asking you to become a monk or live an ascetic life and own only three things—the 30/30 rule challenges you to buy with intention instead of impulse. The rule works because it creates space between wanting something and having it—space where you remember your actual priorities.

So, the next time you’re about to use Apple Pay to buy fake currency on a phone game, try this. Close the app. Set an alert for 30 hours from now. See what happens.

Most likely, you’ll realize that you never needed it all. And if you still want it after waiting? Woohoo! Go for it, buy it guilt-free knowing it was a choice, not a reaction.

The best purchases, it turns out, are often the ones we don’t make.