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homophobia

Health

Women shared how they make sexist men explain their nasty jokes, and it's so satisfying

Making them sit in the discomfort of their own filth is an excellent way to shut that garbage down.

Twitter—Heather Thompson Day/Naomi Savolainen/Chess Pearson

Women share the times they've mad men explain their sexist jokes

Ask almost any woman about a time a man said or did something sexually inappropriate to them, and she'll have a story or four to tell. According to a survey NPR published last year, 81% of women report having experienced sexual harassment, with verbal harassment being the most common. (By contrast, 43% of men report being sexually harassed. Naturally harassment toward anyone of any sex or gender is not okay, but women have been putting up with this ish unchecked for centuries.)

One form of verbal sexual harassment is the all too common sexist or sexual "joke." Ha ha ha, I'm going to say something explicit or demeaning about you and then we can all laugh about how hilarious it is. And I'll probably get away with it because you'll be too embarrassed to say anything, and if you do you'll be accused of being overly sensitive. Ha! Won't that be a hoot?

Perhaps women's familiarity with such episodes is why writer Heather Thompson Day's tweet about asking her male boss to explain a sexual joke to her has had such an enormous response. Day told a story of working at a radio station when she was 19 when her boss, who was in his mid-40s, made an inappropriate comment:

"When I was 19 my boss said I should be a phone sex operator & laughed.

I said 'I don't get it'

He said 'it's a joke'

I said 'explain it to me'

& that's how I learned that once sexual harrassers have to explain why their inappropriate jokes are funny, they stop laughing."

When I was 19 my boss said I should be a phone sex operator & laughed.

I said “I don’t get it”

He said “it’s a joke”

I said “explain it to me”

& that’s how I learned that once sexual harrassers have to explain why their inappropriate jokes are funny, they stop laughing.
— Heather Thompson Day (@HeatherTDay) November 8, 2019

Day's tweet has been shared more than 130K times. Other women also chimed in with similar stories of stopping sexist men in their tracks with their responses to inappropriate jokes.

My first internship was in a very professional company. We learned direct questions quickly stop inappropriate workplace comments. Direct eye contact:
1) I don't understand -- explain it to me.
2) Help me to understand -- repeat it.
3) Can you provide an example?
It works.
— LiteFanFun (@LiteFanFun) November 9, 2019

YES! At my first full time job, my new boss called me and then made the comment that I had the voice of a phone sex operator. I responded, “I wouldn’t know. I’ve never called one.” His stammering and backpedaling still bring me joy over 20 years later.
— New Year, Same V (@scribblesnbitsV) November 10, 2019

I did the same thing to a guy who harassed me on a train. He said some rather disgusting things and I looked him dead in the eyes and said "tell me how you think that's an appropriate thing to say. Explain it to me" he was not happy and got real quiet so I could leave.
— Chess! ♿️ 🏳️‍⚧️ (@Captain_Ogilvy) November 8, 2019

What's baffling is that some men may think that women actually might respond positively to such jokes. One woman simply responds to random harassers with "Please tell me about the last time this worked on an actual woman for you." Works every time.

My personal favorite to dudes who try to chat me up in parking lots, etc. is to ask, “Please tell me about the last time this worked on an actual woman for you.” They IMMEDIATELY run away.
— hashtagkaren (@HashtagKaren) November 9, 2019

Of course, sometimes it takes more than just a no nonsense response to get some dudes to back off.

Was lifeguarding in college and had to watch the water while construction workers built a filming tower in the water. Kept pestering me about “mouth to mouth” and I kept answering with questions straight from the book.
— Leighann Strollo (@LeighannStrollo) November 8, 2019

RELATED: Emma Watson launches hotline that provides women legal advice on workplace sexual harassment

Sometimes it simply takes repeatedly being called out, especially if a man holds a position of power.

My boss made a joke about recognizing my mom because he probably had sex with her in college. I asked him to explain the joke, in an open office, while making direct contact with the COO, his boss. It took four more months and many incidents for him to be fired.
— Ellen Kaulig (@ekaulig) November 9, 2019

As one woman pointed out, it might take the threat of being documented to put an end to it. (Or, you know, actually documenting it can do wonders as well.)

Excellent. I was around 19 when a boss said something over the top and I replied with “I’m going to put that in my log” and he said “what log?” And I said “my harassment log. I write it all down”. And then it all just sort of stopped and I found out he didn’t sleep for 3 days 😂
— Denike (@de_nike) November 9, 2019

Several men jumped into the conversation with words of support. Because of course plenty of men are bothered by sexist "jokes" as well and understand that genuine jokes can be explained without hesitation or embarrassment.

If a thing is genuinely a joke it would be easy to explain.
— dan sheppard (@ashenfaced) November 9, 2019

Men can also use a similar approach when confronting their friends, acquaintances, and colleagues when inappropriate comments or jokes come up.

In fact, Heather Thompson Day said it was her dad who originally instructed her on how to respond to men's inappropriate comments. "Don't laugh," he told her. "Ask them to explain the joke. They will stop making them." Well done, Dad.

I’m not as cool as it sounds. My dad told me when i got the job “if any men say inappropriate comments, don’t laugh. Ask them to explain the joke. They will stop making them.” So Dad’s for the win
— Heather Thompson Day (@HeatherTDay) November 8, 2019

It was also pointed out that this approach works with "jokes" that are racist, homophobic, or otherwise harmful as well. When people have to explain their prejudice and bigotry, they usually can't.

Pro tip: this also works on race "jokes"
— Corey (@HowlFromtheCore) November 8, 2019

I've had several coworkers over the years say, "you know how THOSE people are..." expecting me to agree. So I always say, "no, how ARE they?" Please, explain your racism/bigotry/prejudice to all of us.
— Erin McCord (@erinmcfavorite) November 8, 2019

And then there's always the next level "You remind me of someone heinous" response, which may be a bit brutal, but is sometimes necessary to drive home the point.

I had this happen with someone that thought it was cute to talk about 'coons. Once my "confusion" about racoons annoyed him, he finally dropped the N word, I gave my standard reply: You remind me of my grandfather. He liked to use that word, and he also like to rape little girls.
— Kristy (@llamalluv) November 8, 2019

People in marginalized groups have had to put up with hurtful jokes for far too long. Asking people to explain them and making them sit in the discomfort of their own filth is an excellent way to shut that garbage down.

This article originally appeared on 11.13.19

From Your Site Articles

sexual harassment

Joy

What exactly were Mister Rogers' views towards the LGBTQ community?

In many ways, Rogers was well ahead of his time, boldly pushing boundaries in the right directions.

Screenshot via YouTube official trailer, "Won't You Be My Neighbor?"

Mister Rogers consistently shared love and kindness.

A few nights ago, I was sitting in a dark theater — popcorn in hand and tears leaking down my face — embarrassingly bent out of a shape from a movietrailer. Fred Rogers was to blame.

The whimsical theme song to "Mister Rogers' Neighborhood" concluded a short but powerfully nostalgic preview for the new documentary about the soft-spoken star, "Won't You Be My Neighbor?" And yeah, I'd morphed into a teary-eyed hot mess in a matter of seconds.

A question popped into my queer little brain right then, though, and I'm not entirely sure why:

Could Rogers have quietly been a homophobe?

He was a religious dude who grew up in a wildly different era than today. It's a toxic combination that, if we're overgeneralizing and I reflect on my personal experience, tends to produce the worst kinds of homophobes. Had the former Presbyterian minister been as saintly to queers like me as he'd been to seemingly everyone else?

I needed answers! So I went searching.

big-hearted, television show, compassion, counterculture

History suggests Rogers saw humanity in LGBTQ community.

Photo pulled from YouTube official trailer, "Won't You Be My Neighbor?"

But first, let it be known that I respect Rogers and cherish the mark his big-hearted series left on me and generations past; I certainly wasn't looking for justifications to write a "Mister Rogers" hit piece. In a dark and dreary world, Rogers was a reliably bright light, and I wanted whatever I discovered to confirm my suspicions that the beloved children's advocate was a benevolent force for good — and nothing else.

But one thing I've come to learn as a jaded gay man is that the more flawless a fave of mine seems to be, the harder they fall from the high pedestal I've placed them on once their shortcomings inevitably air. Rogers could very well be the latest victim of my hero-worshipping, I warned myself, opening a Google tab with a preemptive cringe.

Here are the two big things I discovered:

1. Rogers' unfaltering kindness and compassion certainly extended to the LGBTQ community.

Rogers didn't go on the record with specific opinions about LGBTQ people or the matters that affect them (at least from what I could find). But others have reported their experiences with him on the topic. By putting those puzzle pieces together, I would confidently argue that Rogers saw the humanity in LGBTQ people.

He didn't let his faith box him into any certain ideology regarding gay people or their rights. Michael G. Long, who authored the biographical "Peaceful Neighbor: Discovering the Countercultural Mister Rogers," noted Rogers' church in Pittsburgh was and continues to be inclusive to the LGBTQ community. Rogers' widow, Joanne, has said her husband had close friends who were gay, according to Slate.

He also stood strong against outside pressures to use his platform to condemn same-gender relationships, according to Vox's Todd VanDerWerff. Panning homosexuality likely would have been applauded by many parents tuning in, as mainstream America widely embraced homophobic attitudes throughout much of Rogers' reign.

But doing such a thing on-air never felt right to the sweater-loving saint. "He felt everybody was, in some way, a reflection of God," VanDerWerff wrote.

2. But Rogers wasn't immune to the backward views society has held of queer people.

While Rogers hired and befriended Francois Clemmons — a gay man who played Officer Clemmons in the series for 25 years — he didn't necessarily want the show associated with Clemmons' sexual orientation, either.

After word got back to Rogers that Clemmons had been spotted in a gay bar, Rogers asked the actor to avoid such venues, fearful Clemmons' sexuality would bring negative attention to the show.

"It was not a personal statement of how he felt about me," Clemmons assured UU World in 2016, noting the two remained close friends. "It had to do with the economics of the show."

Rogers urged him to stay in the closet, believing Clemmons' sexuality may alienate viewers. He encouraged him to marry a woman, too. Clemmons did — and the relationship ended in divorce a few years later.

It's difficult to reconcile the harmful actions of an icon who lived in a different time.

I wish Rogers had addressed Clemmons' predicament differently, of course. I wish he'd celebrated Clemmons' queerness on screen and off and allowed the actor to sashay his way on stage one trailblazing episode, rainbow flag held high.

But that's the thing: The rainbow flag wasn't associated with LGBTQ pride when Clemmons considered leaving the closet, because LGBTQ pride wasn't even a thing in those pre-Stonewall days (at least in the mainstream). It's not reasonable for me to expect a straight, cisgender man — even a superhero like Rogers — to possess a visionary moral compass and will to champion queer rights half a century before same-gender marriage even became normalized.

Rogers was extraordinary — but he wasn't a social justice clairvoyant.

Mister Rogers' empathetic nature pushed him, and his viewers, to be bold and continually grow in wonderful ways.

It's what has helped enshrine my appreciation for him and his show.

He adored kids and relentlessly fought for their wellbeing. His show regularly took on important and tough topics, like racism, the messiness of divorce, and the importance of inclusion. In many ways, Rogers was well ahead of his time, boldly pushing boundaries in the right directions.

Even on queer issues, Rogers evolved as time went on.

As Long wrote for HuffPost in 2014, Rogers' perspective on Clemmons' sexuality shifted throughout the years:

"Rogers evidently believed Clemmons would tank his career had he come out as a gay man in the late 1960s. But — and this is a crucial point —Rogers later revised his counsel to his younger friend. As countless gays came out more publicly following the Stonewall uprising, Rogers even urged Clemmons to enter into a longterm and stable gay relationship. And he always warmly welcomed Clemmons’ gay friends whenever they visited the television set in Pittsburgh."

I can't speak for Mister Rogers, of course. But he was the one who always told me, "I like you just the way you are."

If he were around today, I'd like to think queer kids would feel right at home in his neighborhood, too.

Watch the trailer (that made me cry) for "Won't You Be My Neightbor?" below:

This article originally appeared on 06.07.18

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celebrity

Identity

Meet 'Fanny and Stella'—two 'sisters' who were actually male lovers in Victorian England

Their story shows that LGBTQ life has always existed.

upload.wikimedia.org

Frederick William Park and Thomas Ernest Boulon, aka Fanny and Stella.

Officially, there were no homosexual men in Victorian England.

But that's just because the word "homosexual" didn't enter the language until the mid-to-late 1890s. ("Transsexual" and "transgender" would catch on even later.)

There were, however, men who engaged in sexual and/or romantic relationships with each other. They just didn't identify with the same words we use today; in fact, many of them used a special cant-like, crypto-language called Polari in order to communicate without exposing themselves in public.

While the rest of society was struggling to define and understand them, they went about with their usual business, living their lives regardless of words.

Consider the case of Frederick William Park and Thomas Ernest Boulton — also known as Fanny and Stella, respectively.

The duo met while working as actors around London, where there was a longstanding tradition in the theater of men cross-dressing to perform as women. Fanny and Stella appeared onstage as sisters, but Park and Boulton carried these identities offstage as well, cavorting at parties and in public.

Fredrick and Thomas pose in an embrace as Fanny and Stella.

Photo via Frederick Spalding/Wikimedia Commons.

Boulton, whose affinity for women's clothing and dreams of femme stardom stretched back to childhood, had a live-in relationship with Lord Arthur Clinton, a naval officer and the son of the 5th duke of Newcastle. Park, on the other hand, was the son of a judge. While it's not clear whether he was involved sexually with either Boulton or Clinton, he was known to have a written correspondence with Clinton in character as Fanny.

relationships, victorian, transgender, laws

Clinton, Boulton, and Park pose for a photograph.

Clinton, Boulton, and Park. Photo via Frederick Spalding/Wikimedia Commons.

Things started to get messy when Fanny and Stella were arrested outside of London's Royal Strand Theatre on April 28, 1870.

Their alleged crime? "Conspiring and inciting persons to commit an unnatural offense" with the other men they were accompanying. Lord Clinton was also indicted in the scandal but tragically died before it went to trial, possibly by suicide.

When the case reached the court, the prosecution faced a difficult challenge. There was nothing technically illegal about a man wearing a dress in public, and it was impossible to prove someone guilty of "being gay or transgender" when the words didn't yet exist. Thus, the only potentially punishable offense for which Fanny and Stella could be tried was sodomy.

Fanny and Stella stood before a judge in their best evening gowns while doctors presented physical evidence of sodomy. Even the public at the time thought the spectacle was ridiculous, and the two were ultimately acquitted by a jury.

freedom, human rights, transgender, history

A drawing depicting both Fredrick and Thomas being arrested in 1870.

Image via The Illustrated Police News/Wikimedia Commons.

In 1880, Victorian values were once again scandalized by the "disgraceful proceedings" of a so-called "drag ball" in Manchester.

The private event on Sept. 24, 1880, at the city's Temperance Hall was organized by a group calling themselves the Pawnbrokers' Assistants' Association. They took numerous precautions to protect the guests' identities, including a bouncer at the door dressed as a nun, black paper on the windows, and a blind accordion player to provide the party's music with plausible deniability.

Somehow, Detective Jerome Caminada, who's believed to be the inspiration for Sherlock Holmes, caught wind of the occasion. The sneaky sleuth reportedly observed "men dressed in the most fantastic fashion, and eight of them in the garb of women."

The police waited until the early hours of the morning to raid the party and ended up arresting nearly 50 people for the crime of "having solicited and incited each other to commit an unnameable offense" — again, because there was nothing explicitly illegal about "being queer and dancing the can-can."

In the end, most of the defendants were forced to pay a bond in a promise to the court for 12 months of "good behavior."

legal, laws, transgender rights, police news

A cartoon published in the Police News talking about the incident.

Image via Wikimedia Commons.

Five years later, the U.K. passed the Criminal Law Amendment Act of 1885, which made "gross indecency" punishable by prison time.

Member of Parliament Henry Labouchère realized that if they were ever going to bring charges against queer men, trying to legally prove they engaged in sodomy wasn't the answer.

Labouchère came up with the vaguely defined term gross indecency, which basically meant any kind of physical sexual contact between two people with penises that the court deemed "gross." (There was no comparable law against queer women.) The new law was tacked onto an amendment about the age of consent.

Perhaps the most famous charge of gross indecency was against Oscar Wilde, who served two years hard labor in Reading prison, from which he never quite recovered. The British codebreaker and computer science progenitor Alan Turing was also charged with gross indecency in 1952. As punishment, he was chemically castrated; 50 years later, the British government acknowledged the action was grossly inhumane.

statues, memoriam, history, reformation, transgender rights

Statues made in honor of mathematician Alan touring and writer Oscar Wilde respectively.

Photos via Lmno/Wikimedia Commons and Sandro Schachner/Wikimedia Commons.

(Left) The Alan Turing memorial in Sackville Park, Manchester, and the Oscar Wilde memorial in Merrion Square, Dublin.

Sex between two consenting British males was finally decriminalized in 1967 — but anti-gay laws stayed on the books in Scotland and Northern Ireland until the 1980s.

It still took until 2010 for the U.K. to secure most other rights for LGBTQ people, including adoption, marriage, and protection from discrimination.

The fight for sexual and gender equality has been long and arduous, but one thing is certain: Queer people have always been here, regardless of what they were called at various times in history.

Naming things is how we give them power. The words we use today make it easier for us to see and to accept identities that have always been present for what they truly are: essential parts of the human experience.

This article originally appeared on 12.21.16

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history

Identity

Here's how 18 people got over being homophobic, proving there's hope for everyone

"I looked for logical reasons to be and couldn't find any."

via Unsplash

Homophobia? Get over it.

There are many different reasons why some people are homophobic. A lot of them are raised in religious households where homosexuality is seen as sinful and they never get over their indoctrination.

A study from 2018 found that people who foster homophobic attitudes are less intelligent than those who accept people regardless of their sexuality. For the study, researchers asked subjects if they agree or disagree with the following statement: “Homosexual couples should have the same rights as heterosexual couples do.”

After comparing data sets, researchers found that the lower a person's cognitive intelligence, the more likely they are to be homophobic.

An older study from 2016 using an eye-tracking device found that some homophobic men seem to have an impulsive, automatic attraction to other men.

Homophobic attitudes are more prevalent in people with authoritarian personality types. Authoritarians have “submissive attitudes toward strong leaders, a desire to punish all who violate conventional moral codes, and strong fear that conventional morality is breaking down.”

There are also some who believe that humans evolved to be homophobic because it favors the propagation of the species. "In its simplest form, parents who showed a concern for their child’s sexual orientation may have left more descendants than those who were indifferent,” Gordon Gallup, a human sexuality researcher, wrote.

(It should be noted that Gallup formulated his theory in the ‘80s.)

Regardless of how people become homophobic, the good news is that Americans are slowly becoming more accepting of LGBTQ people. A Reddit user by the name of aestheticbear wanted to prove that everyone is capable of losing their homophobic views by asking the subforum, “What happened that made you stop being homophobic?”

According to the posts, growing up and meeting people who are LGBTQ was one of the most effective ways for people to get over their homophobia. It also helped when they got away from religious parents and began to see the world with their own eyes.

Here are 18 of the best ways that people got over being homophobic.

1.

"I met some gay people. As it turns out they were just people." — moolord

2.

"Not homophobic, but I woke up at about 10 when my mom said my uncle was banned from coming to our vacation condo by my father because he was gay. Before then I kind of let the arguments and both sides bit wash over me, but that was a crystalization point where I started noticing it as pure bigotry. I'm sorry the nicest dude in the family full of domestic violence and white-collar drug abusers cant come to Christmas because he's gay? You're both cheating on each other, sanctity of what marriage now?" — Robin_Games

3.

"My mom slapped me and told me everyone has a right to be happy. That was in 9th grade 13 years ago." — Bloodllust

4.

"Homophobia was the norm when I was growing up, then I got older and the political landscape changed which made me question my belief and I came to the conclusion it just didn't make any sense to be homophobic." — LuciferIsFallen

5.

"I came out as gay." — pethal

6

"Realised that, fundamentally, being gay is just 'what' you are. It’s not 'who' you are." — Alternative-Rain-718

7.

"I wasn't super homophobic, just a 'love the sinner, hate the sin' kind of guy. On my last day in high school, someone said 'Why do I care? They're not hurting me.' Cured me in three seconds. I still remember how magical that moment was for me." — Dirgonite

8.

"Stopped listening to my homophobic family and left their religion. Oh and also realized I myself was pretty gay." — Raidden

9.

"There are 20 years between myself and my youngest brother. I (and my SO) was raised in an explicitly homophobic/biphobic/transphobic fundamentalist religion (that I left with my SO in my early 20s) so I had a lot of internalized, conditioned, toxic beliefs about the LGBTQ that needed to be deconstructed. My little brother was obviously either gay or bi and it was obvious from the time he was six imho. He came out to my sisters, SO, and I as bi when he was 11 and we were like "tell us something we don't know lol." I think watching him just grow up, it was obvious that he hadn't chosen to be that way, it was just how he was. This false narrative that LGBTQ are somehow defective or sinners became more disgusting to me over time.

I can't remember exactly when it happened but my SO and I were like 'if our future child happened to be LGBTQ, could we teach that child the things we were taught about the LGBTQ?" We were like "no, that would be evil.'

Now, we have an 18yo niece that recently came out as a lesbian and we feel honored to be the only family that she trusts enough to introduce to her first GF. Spending time with her just reaffirms the fact that there is nothing wrong with the LGBTQ, it was our upbringing that was defective." — Jormungandr91

10.

"I was in the military during the repeal of don’t ask don’t tell. I wasn’t pro-gay whatever that might mean but sitting in those mandatory command meetings really opened my eyes. There were some legit homophobes trying every trick in the book to justify everything from moving sleeping arrangements to outright violence out in the open with gay people in the room.

I may not have been super sympathetic before that but after I realized just how difficult it was for a gay person just to go to work. Or how many precautions they were taking on a daily basis to keep in the closet. It pushed me from disinterested in the subject to siding with the obviously pragmatic stance of pro-gay marriage and gays in the military." — Pencilowner

11.

"Went off to college, started meeting gay people, quickly realized that their awesomeness was no different than any straight person’s awesomeness, stopped bothering to “otherize” them as I had in high school." — hailnaux

12.

"I became good friends with someone who came out to me a year or so after we got to know each other. Turns out he wasn't the abomination that my Christian parents/church had taught me all gays were. Indoctrination of children is a bitch." — Vefantur

13.

"Honestly I think it was Lady Gaga. I was young and impressionable and she was cool and so LGBT+ friendly that I just started accepting people. And then it turned out I was a lil gay too so things worked out well lol." — plutoforprez

14.

"I grew up and met some openly gay people." — polkavert

15.

"I became an atheist. Through a painful experience of getting through serious depression, I came out the other side with a different worldview. As soon as I shed religion I began to question a lot of things including how I really feel about LGBTQIA people vs what I'd been indoctrinated to believe. They are just people trying to go about their normal routine like myself. There's no vast conspiracy or 'gay agenda.'

Years later, I suspect I'm one of them now. I might be asexual but I'm not sure yet." —HonestSummer

16.

"As a teen I loved to make fun/bash gay people and listen to heavy metal. Then one day Rob Halford from Judas Priest came out as gay. Well, he is fucking Rob Halford and he can do whatever the fuck he wants. He is Rob Halford and being gay did not make him any less amazing in my eyes. After that I stopped caring about people being gay or not. Who am I to second guess or mock Rob Halford's life choices?" — cambeiu

17.

"I looked for logical reasons to be and couldn't find any." — theyellowmeteor

18.

"I grew up." — jthomas287

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Heroes

Dan Levy’s mom shared a lovely note on worrying about her 'little boy who loved to twirl'

Deborah Divine/Twitter, Nelson Mando'za/Twitter

The world has come a long way in the past few decades when it comes to acceptance of people in the LGBTQ+ community. Those of us who grew up in pre-millennial generations remember a very different time, when hiding one's sexual orientation or identity was the norm, homophobic jokes barely batted an eye, and seeing someone living an "out and proud" life was far less common than it is today.

That was the world Dan Levy grew up in. The Schitt's Creek actor and co-creator was born in 1983, and on the day of the series finale of Schitt's Creek, his mom Deborah Divine shared a tweet that perfectly encapsulates not only the changes we've seen in society since then, but the impact Levy himself has had on that world.

She wrote:

"Today I regret every single second of worry back in the uninformed 80's-wondering how the world was going to treat my brilliant little boy who loved to twirl. Little did I know that he was going to kick that old world's ass to the curb and create a brand new one."

This. Love you, mom. https://t.co/mhq9g5hpr9
— dan levy (@dan levy) 1586294245.0

Oof, my heart.

It's difficult to measure the mark Dan Levy (and family) made with the hit TV show Schitt's Creek, but it's significant. It's not like we hadn't seen LGBTQ+ representation on television before—we just hadn't seen it quite like this. In most shows with LGBTQ+ characters, their identity was either a conflict or a punchline, as were people's reactions to them. Generally speaking, homophobia has dominated the storyline of such characters, whether it played out in comedy or drama.

In Schitt's Creek, Levy created a world where there was no homophobia. It just didn't exist amongst the characters in the show. The closest we came to seeing it was when Patrick was worried about how his parents would react to finding out he had a boyfriend, but that turned out to be a momentary fear that was immediately squelched by his parents' unreserved acceptance.

The rest of the time, all we saw in the town of Schitt's Creek was an embracing of the characters for who they were, quirky outfits notwithstanding. What we experienced in that world was an example of what the world could be.

Watching David and Patrick’s wedding finally and basically my face is an ocean right now. 🥺😭 #SchittsCreek https://t.co/HXW7W8Micw
— Nelson Mando’za (@Nelson Mando’za) 1605473398.0

And it was done with simple storytelling. The romcom sweetness David and Patrick's relationship from "meet cute" to marriage was something we've rarely seen with a same-sex couple on screen. Honestly, the joyful normalness of it all probably did more to help people understand and accept gay relationships than most overt activism ever could. Activism is important for advocating for rights and justice, but those battles are a lot easier to fight when people's hearts are on your side. And people's hearts are what Dan Levy has played a role in changing most.

He comes by it honestly. In a speech for GLAAD last year, Levy said that his family's unconditional love and support—as exemplified by his mom's tweet—were what made him feel safe to come out at 18.

Dan Levy reflects on creating Schitt's Creek, “A place where everybody fits in."youtu.be

"Had I not had the love to give me a sense of security, I don't know if I would have found my way out of the closet, let alone create the opportunity for myself to tell stories on television that have effected some kind of positive change in the world," he said. "Support, encouragement and love: three relatively simple acts of kindness that can change the course of a person's life."

For six seasons, Levy showed us a world where everyone embraces those three simple acts of kindness, so everyone is safe. What a wonderful world that turned out to be for all of us.

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Her husband kicked out their teenage son for being gay, but this 'Country Mama' fought back

via Unsplash

There has been a drastic change in public opinion over homosexuality in the past thirty years, especially when it comes to parents accepting their gay children.

According to Pew Research, in 1985, 89% of parents said they'd be upset if their child came out as homosexual and just 9% said they would not be.

In 2015, 37% of parents said they'd be upset and 57% said they wouldn't be.

While public opinion is clearly going in the right direction, there is still a lot of work to be done. A recent story that popped up on Reddit shows having a LGBT child can still divide a home. However, in this case, it seems like it was a good thing.

A mother needed to vent about the horrific way her husband treated her 15-year-old son after he came out of the closet, so she created a Reddit account under the name CountryMamaLynn and posted her story on the LGBT forum.

Unfortunately, the post has since been deleted.

"My husband kicked him out while I was at work… I left work early and drove over to my house where I saw my baby boy sitting on the curb with his clothes and shit all across the damn lawn," she wrote.

She then said that Mark her, "soon-to-be ex-husband," was "not the man she thought she married" and she didn't mince words with how she felt about the way he treated her son.

"I gave that bastard a piece of my mind and told him that if he can't be a man and support his son then he can kiss my ass and find someone else to pay his bills," she continued.

So she took her son and and some belongings and booked a hotel room.

Although CountryMamaLynn isn't very familiar with the LGBT community, she did her best to become an ally and support her son by purchasing him a "a bunch of Pride stuff" and "knitting him a rainbow blanket."

Her son had kept his boyfriend of seven months a secret and and CountryMamaLynn was over the moon to meet him. "I'm getting to meet him over FaceTime tomorrow and I'm so excited! I'm doing everything I can to make him feel loved," she wrote.

She pulled no punches when talking about her husband. "I don't have to put up with this crap," CountryMamaLynn wrote. "So I told him to haul ass before I make him." She drove the point home by holding a camouflaged baseball bat duing the confrontation.

CountryMamaLynn's life changed over night after her son came out and it's had a big impact on how she sees herself, too.

"I was talking to my son… and found out my not be just a straight ally!" she wrote.

"I assumed all straight ladies were also just as attracted to other ladies as they were [to] men and I never really thought about it until now but turns out I might be bi?

"Is that the right word?" Yes, it is the right word, CountryMamaLynn.

From Your Site Articles

A gay content creator’s viral thread exposed YouTube's casual acceptance of homophobia

A Bloomberg investigation of YouTube last April found that videos produced for an extreme, alt-right audience are just as popular as music, sports, and gaming on the platform.

These channels allow for the rampant spread of misinformation, hate speech, and harassment. Carlos Maza, host of "Strikethrough" a Vox-produced YouTube show that explores the challenges facing the news media in the age of Trump, perfectly illustrated the cycle of abuse in a recent tweet thread.

— (@)

Maza knows the cycle first-hand because he has been targeted by conservative YouTuber Steven Crowder who routinely refers to Maza by derogatory terms such as "anchor baby" and "lispy queer."

Maza says that Crowder's comments have resulted in a "a wall of homophobic [and] racist abuse on Instagram and Twitter."

After repeatedly flagging Crowder's YouTube videos and receiving zero response, Maza took to Twitter to vent his frustration.

So, I have pretty thick skin when it comes to online harassment, but something has been really bothering me.
— Carlos Maza (@gaywonk) May 31, 2019

Since I started working at Vox, Steven Crowder has been making video after video "debunking" Strikethrough. Every single video has included repeated, overt attacks on my sexual orientation and ethnicity. Here's a sample: pic.twitter.com/UReCcQ2Elj
— Carlos Maza (@gaywonk) May 31, 2019

Last year, I got doxxed, and it scared the fuck out of me. My phone was bombarded with hundreds of texts at the exact same time. The messages? pic.twitter.com/ls4qBM9k08
— Carlos Maza (@gaywonk) May 31, 2019

That being said, I'm not mad at Crowder. There will always be monsters in the world. I'm fucking pissed at @YouTube, which claims to support its LGBT creators, and has explicit policies against harassment and bullying: https://t.co/K9XJGAP7Xp pic.twitter.com/4GUfTDuOXS
— Carlos Maza (@gaywonk) May 31, 2019

This has been going on for years, and I've tried to flag this shit on several occasions. But YouTube is never going to actually enforce its policies. Because Crowder has 3 million YouTube subscribers, and enforcing their rules would get them accused on anti-conservative bias.
— Carlos Maza (@gaywonk) May 31, 2019

This isn't about "silencing conservatives." I don't give a flying fuck if conservatives on YouTube disagree with me. But by refusing to enforce its anti-harassment policy, YouTube is helping incredibly powerful cyberbullies organize and target people they disagree with.
— Carlos Maza (@gaywonk) May 31, 2019

YouTube does not give a fuck about queer creators.
YouTube does not give a fuck about marginalized creators.
YouTube does not give a fuck about diversity or inclusion.

YouTube wants clicks.
YouTube wants clicks.
YouTube wants clicks.
— Carlos Maza (@gaywonk) May 31, 2019

A lot of people have pointed out that Crowder is wearing a “Socialism Is For Fags" shirt in several of his videos.

Turns out, he sells that shirt to his YouTube fans, and proudly displays it in his Twitter cover photo. What are these platforms doing? pic.twitter.com/x9F6xOFNhk
— Carlos Maza (@gaywonk) May 31, 2019

If Crowder loses his channel, I'm going to get hit with another avalanche of abuse and will likely get doxxed again.

That's what's so fucked up about these platforms: they create wildly powerful monsters and then ask the targets of abuse to draw further attention to themselves.
— Carlos Maza (@gaywonk) May 31, 2019

After the tweet thread went viral, YouTube responded by announcing it would investigate Crowder's channel.

Thanks so much for outlining all of this–we're looking into it further. Sending you a DM now.
— TeamYouTube (@TeamYouTube) May 31, 2019

Crowder responded to the investigation by condemning those who have harassed Maza. "I have always condemned and continue to discourage any and all forms of doxxing or targeted harassment of anyone online, ok?" he said in a video response.

But he defended calling him a "lispy queer" because "it's funny and this is a comedy show" and because Maza refers to himself as queer.

Crowder's defense is disingenuous because there's a big difference between using the term queer to refer to someone's sexual orientation versus using it as an insult. His defense is tougher to believe when he uses the term "fag" to disparage people.

Crowder also claimed that the investigation was a form of corporate censorship and an attempt by YouTube to please NBC, a Vox Media investor.

Maza responded to Crowder by calling his assertions "batshit."

The right-wing persecution complex is unbelievable.

Imagine spending two years calling a total stranger a "lispy queer" and then playing victim when he decides to do something about it.
— Carlos Maza (@gaywonk) June 3, 2019

Nobody asked Crowder to spend years mocking my sexuality or ethnicity. I have never mentioned Crowder in a single YouTube video. I spent years quietly watching him call me a “lispy queer" to his fans.

The idea that I started this to take down a “competitor" is genuinely batshit.
— Carlos Maza (@gaywonk) June 3, 2019

And yet after all of that, YouTube's investigation proved mostly fruitless. Though the company apologized to LGBTQ groups for Crowder's harassment, they've decided to let him keep his YouTube channel.