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Teachers

Former teacher shares the funny 'secret code' she used when talking to parents

“Your son is going to make a great lawyer" is code for: "Your kid won’t stop arguing with me."

Sometimes a secret code is a gentler approach.

There are many things that teachers think but cannot say aloud. Teachers have to have a certain sense of decorum and often have strict rules about how they speak about their students, especially to their parents.

Plus, it’s a teacher’s job to educate, not judge. So, they find ways to kindly and sincerely say what’s on their minds without having to resort to name-calling or telling the (sometimes disparaging) truth about a student.


Jess Smith is a former teacher who goes by the moniker Miss Smith as a stand-up comedian and on her podcast, Hot Mess Teacher Express. She decided to have a little fun with euphemisms, or the “secret code” she had to use when speaking to parents about their children.

The video went viral on TikTok after being shared by the Bored Teachers page.

@bored_teachers

Have you used our secret Teacher Code when talking with parents?? 🤫 #teachersoftiktok #teacherlife #secret #teacher #parents

"We have a code when we email parents," Smith said in her video. "When we use phrases like, ‘Your child is very social,’ that means they won’t stop talking," she explained. “'Their excitement in the classroom is contagious,' translates to 'They will not calm down,'" Smith said, adding that a "natural born leader" is a polite way of saying "super bossy."

The post struck a chord with parents and teachers who shared secret codes they’ve heard or used.

“My son’s pre-k teacher told me he was the most scientific kid she’s ever had, she prob meant he asks a million questions allll day long," TinaMarie wrote. “In kindergarten, I got ‘is overly helpful’ when my parents asked the teacher said I was finishing my test and giving answers out so we could play,” Tallulahthegreat added.

“When I first started teaching, I was told to tell parents their child is ‘spirited’ if they never stop talking and can’t sit still," Allie commented.

“‘Your son is going to make a great lawyer,’ which is code for: your kid won’t stop arguing with me," C added.

However, the post wasn’t a hit with everyone. Some believe teachers should speak to parents in a straightforward manner and avoid using euphemisms.

“As a parent. I would rather a teacher just tell me, instead of using codes. We know our kids. We live with them and you have them for 8 hours," happily_married wrote in the comments.

“It’s time to start saying it like it is. Why are we so afraid of laying the truth on the line?" QYMSC added.

In an interview with the TODAY show, Smith assured everyone that when she was a teacher, she had no problem being straightforward when necessary. “If a serious conversation needed to happen, I didn’t sugarcoat it,” Smith said. But the code was a way for her to share difficult information politely, in a non-confrontational way.

“Connecting with the parents was always important to me, and I never wanted them to feel like, ’This is your problem to take care of.’ No, this is something we can work on together. I’m here to help your kid,” Smith said. “I found that parents just responded better to the code.”


This article originally appeared two years ago.

Photo by CDC on Unsplash

New Jersey teacher saves choking student.

Teachers are often unsung heroes. They provide our children with a safe and loving environment so they can learn while feeling supported. Throughout the pandemic, teachers have really felt the weight of the effects the forced isolation had on their students, but that hasn’t stopped them from showing up and giving them their best. Oftentimes teachers have to double as therapists, social workers, and nurses, especially when a school district is short-staffed in those areas. One New Jersey elementary teacher’s nurse's hat came in handy when a student was playing with a water bottle and the cap seemingly popped off of the bottle and down the child’s throat.

The child looked stunned as the realization of what just happened quickly washed over his face before he stood up ripping his mask from around his neck and going straight to his teacher. The teacher, Janiece Jenkins, can clearly see the panic in the student’s eyes as he frantically points to his throat, appearing to mouth that he couldn’t breathe. Jenkins stayed calm and immediately began giving the scared child the Heimlich maneuver.

@abc7ny

DRAMATIC RESCUE: A NJ teacher is being hailed a hero for saving the life of a choking student #news #fyp #nj #choking #rescue #caughtoncamera

After a few thrusts to the boy’s abdomen the bottle cap dislodges and goes flying to the floor. Jenkins then comforts the child as a look of relief washes across both of their faces. After taking the student's face into her hands and wiping his tears you can tell the moment was stressful for everyone involved, including the concerned students watching things unfold from their desks.

Everyone who works in a school must know basic first aid, and for good reason. With everything they do, teachers clearly deserve to be the highest paid professionals out there. They never know what’s going to be thrown their way, but they almost always seem to handle it with grace and knowledge.

This article originally appeared three years ago.

@7thgradechronicles/TikTok

According to 7th graders, 30-year-olds want soup for Christmas.

Seventh grade teacher Mr. Frakes routinely asks his students to give their observations on various aspects of adulthood to post on his TikTok.—everything from “things parents love to say” to reactions to old school songs to guessing the “worst parts about adulting." The answers are always hilarious…if not a little brutal to us olds. His Christmas edition is no different. Mr. Frakes asked his students “what do you buy someone in their 30s for the holidays?” And the adults who saw the video can’t help but commend the accuracy.

The list is as follows, verbatim.

“Measuring cups…bwahaha.”

"Signs that say ‘Bless The Home.’”

“A Dyson vacuum.”

“A bottle of wine and hip implants.”

“Panera bread gift card. People in their 30s love soup!”

“Bingo cards.”

“You give them Bath & Body Works stuff. That’s what my mom wants!”

“Expensive meats.”

“Hard Candies.”

“Candy Crush Premium.”

“You get them old people candles that smell like ‘home’ or ‘back then.’”

“T.J. Maxx gift card.”

“The wrinkle creams.”

“Heated blanket cause their muscles be hurtin.”

“A coffee mug that says ‘don’t talk to me til I’ve had my coffee’ because they’re all coffee obsessed millennials.”

“A lawyer for the divorce attorney. (fight for the kids).”

@7thgradechronicles Its me. I’m 30s. 😂🫣😬#teachersoftiktok #teacher #teacherlife #teachertok #middleschool #middleschoolteacher #middleschoolteacher #middleschoollife #dyson #panerabread #tjmaxx ♬ Holly Jolly Christmas - Michael Bublé

Obviously, adults who saw this joked about feeling personally attacked. But also seen.

Case and point: one person wrote, “Okay the ‘they’re all coffee obsessed millennials’ was personal” as another admitted, “I watched this while drinking coffee out of my ‘dont’ talk to me til I’ve had my coffee’ mug.”

Meanwhile, another added, “ But are they wrong? Because I honestly love soup and candles. I’m 36.”

Echoing that sentiment, someone commented, “not me thinking all those gifts sound amazing.”

And of course, everyone was eyeing that Dyson vacuum.

Growing older might mean muscles that “be hurtin’” and some judgement from the younger generation, but it clearly also comes with a deep felt appreciation for the simple, practical things in life, as indicated by this list. Nothing wrong with that.

(After all, the young ones might balk now, but it won’t be long til they become coffee obsessed as well.)

May we all get a bit of holiday joy this year, in whatever form we can.


This article originally appeared two years ago.

Education

Former teacher gets blunt about the 'denial' some parents have about their kids education

"They're more concerned about the optics…than about taking care of the child's needs."

A former teacher breaks down the "denial" some parents have about their kid's academic performance

Many kids are seriously struggling in school. According to US News, an estimated 49% of public school students started off the 2022-2023 school year behind in at least one subject compared to the previous year, which saw 50% of students behind. While that's an improvement of 1%, it's not enough to show that kids are getting back on the right track.

While there are several factors contributing to this issue—the effects of the COVID-19 pandemic, a lack of resources for many public schools, a teacher shortage—several educators feel that a majorly overlooked aspect is parents involvement, or lack thereof, in their child’s education.

Recently, one former teacher bluntly stated that it was parents' “denial” that’s to blame. Odion, who now works as a flight attendant, made her case in response to another teacher's TikTok asking parents why they're unaware that their children are underperforming for their grade level.

In the original video, user @qbthedon laments that his 7th grade students still perform at a 4th grade level, and, despite his efforts, those kids still move onto the next grade even though they're not ready. The worst part is that the parents don’t seem to be aware that their kids are extremely behind.

@qbthedon Lets chat!! #fyp #viral #teachertok ♬ original sound - QBSkiiii

This lack of awareness and engagement dates back further than the pandemic years, says Odion, who taught Pre-K and Kindergarten in 2013.

Case in point: parent-teacher conference nights, where virtually no parent would show up. Odion then recalled one father who did attend with his daughter, called Tia for the story, but would not believe that Tia did not know the full alphabet.

"In kindergarten, you have to at least know, I think it was 80% of the 52 letters, as in uppercase and lowercase, and you have to be able to identify at random. So, I'm telling the dad that she barely knows 10 letters. And he's in denial. 'Nah, you know, she knows her letters,'" Odion says.

She then acts out that night, using a makeshift flashcard like she did to test Tia.

"I literally said, 'What letter is this?'” Odion says while holding up the letter “M.” “She said something that's not it. Put another one down. 'What letter is this?' She don't know it."

screenshot of woman in glasses speaking to camera

"I literally said, 'What letter is this?'”

@bodacious.bobo/TikTok

Still, the dad insisted that Tia knew her letters. Eventually, he blamed Tia’s older brother, who, despite only being a sixth grader himself, was “supposed to teach her.”

“It is not up to a child in elementary school, or middle school, or really any of your older kids, as someone who's an older child... It is not up to the kids to teach younger kids,” Odion says in the clip.

Using another example, Odion states that a fifth grader in her class was reading at a kindergarten level and could only process basic sentences like “I see you” and “I like to see.”

In this instance, the students should be held back in order to fully learn the year’s curriculum. But Odion argues that parents fight against it because "they are more concerned about the optics of a child being held back than actually taking care of the child's needs."

"I see you" and "I like to see" written on white paper.

"Parents, y'all can't be backseat drivers about your child's learning."

@bodacious.bobo/TikTok

In this instance, the students should be held back in order to fully learn the year’s curriculum. But Odion argues that parents fight against it “because they are more concerned about the optics of a child being held back than actually taking care of the child's needs."

While the research shows that holding kids back a grade does improve their academic performance by granting them more time, there are still significant pros and cons to consider. In other words, being held back might not be the best solution for every struggling child. The biggest point Odion seems to be trying to make is that in addition to teachers and administrators, parents need to be more proactive in their child’s education.

@bodacious_bobo #stitch with @QBSkiiii ♬ original sound - Odion • $OdionE

"Parents, y'all can't be backseat drivers about your child's learning. You have to help reinforce it at home. You put a kid in front of that phone or iPad whenever they come home, it better be on YouTube, and it better be learning about letters and sight words. You can't tell me you can't read to the kid. It takes 10 minutes to read to the kid. No one is that busy,” she concludes.

This article originally appeared in January.