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If you've spent time on social media the past two weeks, you've undoubtedly seen a deluge of content about women feeling unsafe going about daily life. For some of us, especially those who have survived violence, the fear is constant. For others, it's a hum in the background of our minds that gets louder in certain situations. But I don't think it's a stretch to say that most women think about their bodily safety far more often than men do.

Women have been sharing mental checklists we go through to navigate the world, and it's a lot. Even those of us who have managed to get through life in a woman's body without being assaulted still have to think about our safety all. the. time.

Obviously, the best thing men can do to help women feel safe is to actually be safe. Equally obvious is the fact that creeps who harass or molest or assault women aren't looking for a list like this to change their behavior. But there's a lot that good men can do to help ease the burden women feel when we're out and about.

Here are some tips for men who genuinely want women to feel safe, who may not realize they're inadvertently making us feel unsafe, and who understandably need some guidance on what actually helps.

1. Recognize that our wariness of you is not personal.

If I'm walking to my car after leaving the grocery store at night and you walk out behind me, I probably won't think much of it. If your car happens to be parked near mine, and you're walking behind me the whole time I'm headed there, my radar will probably go up. I'll probably pull out my keys and be ready to gouge you in the eyes if I have to. It's not you. I just have no way of knowing whether you're a sweet, kind guy just going to his car or a predator who sees an opportunity. I want to believe the former, but I have to be prepared for the latter. We know it's #notallmen. We just don't know which men.

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