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Fed up news anchor had the best response to a man who told her to dress ‘like a normal woman’

Women shouldn't have to dress for the male gaze.

Fed up news anchor had the best response to a man who told her to dress ‘like a normal woman’
via KGW-TV / YouTube

One of the major differences between women and men is that women are often judged based on their looks rather than their character or abilities.

"Men as well as women tend to establish the worth of individual women primarily by the way their body looks, research shows. We do not do this when we evaluate men," Naomi Ellemers Ph.D. wrote in Psychology Today.

Dr. Ellers believes that this tendency to judge a woman solely on her looks causes them to be seen as an object rather than a person.


"As a result of focusing on their outwardly visible features, we are tempted to overlook their inner states, ignore markers of their intentions, beliefs, and desires, and less likely to empathize with their plight," Ellers continued.

Women in the spotlight are constantly being judged based on their looks rather than their performance in a given field. Serena Williams once won the French Open but all the press was about what she wore on the court.

Hillary Clinton has been constantly being criticized throughout her political life for what she wore or her hair style rather than her accomplishments.

Maggie Vespa, a news anchor at KGW-TV in Portland, was criticized for how she dresses by a male viewer, so she brilliantly took the incident and used it as a way to talk about the double standards women face.

via KGW-TV / YouTube

"Just wanted to let you know that the clothes you've been wearing, especially those crazy pants that ride half way up your torso, are not cool looking, in any way!," Jeffrey, a male viewer, wrote to Vespa on Facebook. You're way too pretty to look so foolish."

The next day, he sent her another message. "OMG, you really looked uncomfortably tonight. Try dressing like a normal woman. Doesn't KGW pay you enough for a wardrobe makeover?" Jeffrey wrote.

via KGW-TV / YouTube

Vespa posted about the emails on social media and received hundreds of responses, so she carved out a few minutes to discuss the situation on the news.

"Let's just get this out of the way at the top. This is dumb," Vespa responded.

There was no way she was going to start dressing for the male gaze.

"These are my pants. I like them. I bought them."

Maggie went on to show photos of five different pairs of high-waisted pants that she wore in the week following Jeffrey's messages. Maggie's colleagues also got in on it, donning high-waisted pants to show their support.

via KGW-TV / YouTube

Vespa said the harassment "hit a nerve" with people on social media who used it as an opportunity to discuss "the pressure women obviously face, especially those in the public eye to embody the epitome of physical attractiveness at all times."

"If we don't, it's somehow seen as a sign that we're less credible or less capable and, by and large, guys don't have to deal with this," Vespa continued. " As my awesome male coworkers can and have attested to."

Vespa then brilliantly spun the harassment into an empowering message for women.

"Our goal here is to send a message, to women, to girls, to everyone: Dress how you want, look how you want, and if anybody tries to make you feel less than because of that, that's their problem, not yours," Vespa said.


This article originally appeared on 9.11.19

Visit Sweden
True

It’s no secret that modern life is stressful. Burnout is an epidemic. The World Health Organization boldly stated its dedicated efforts to help people improve their health and well-being through nature.

And thanks to a new initiative, Sweden is stepping up to offer a new holistic remedy: a physician-prescribed visit to Sweden, aka “The Swedish Prescription”.

“We have made great strides in making nature/social/culture prescription a more integral part of public health in the United States– but there is still so much more to be done,” said Dr. Stacy Stryer, Associate Medical Director for Park RxAmerica.“I welcome Sweden’s initiative and hope it will help break down institutional and organizational barriers, ultimately benefiting all patients.”

AdvertisementPatients can escape to Sweden’s pristine environment for true respite. Backed by scientific data and research from Yvonne Forsell, Senior Professor at Karolinska Institutet, healthcare professionals can prescribe Sweden as a destination where patients engage in non-medical treatments and outdoor activities to ease their ailments and offer a fresh reset.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Restore body and mind with the Swedish ritual of alternating ice baths and saunas. Swim, hike or forage through silent forests, lakes, parks and nature reserves – or simply sit in the stillness. Witness the Northern Lights dancing across winter skies, or soak up the calm of the summer midnight sun. In Stockholm, Europe’s clean-air capital, take a deep breath and feel the difference.

Or skip the great outdoors and spend time embracing Sweden’s unique cultural practices. “Our cozy fika tradition [Sweden’s daily pause for coffee and conversation], our “lagom”-balanced lifestyle [the idea of “not too much, not too little”] and our easily accessible nature are a soothing balm for body and mind,” says Susanne Andersson, CEO at Visit Sweden.

Sit back in front of a masterpiece in one of Sweden’s many art museums, or head out to a live music event after browsing concert options on Swedish-founded Spotify. You might catch chart-topping hits from producer Max Martin or discover the country’s thriving metal scene. Call it an early – or late – night, and enjoy restorative sleep in Sweden’s cool night air.

Sweden is the therapeutic destination your health has been craving. Learn more about “The Swedish Prescription” and its benefits for your mental and physical health here.

Image courtesy of Reddit/Slow-moving-sloth

Foods like casseroles were popular during the 1970s.

All things old are new again—and the same goes for classic recipes.

For those who grew up during the 1970s (that's Baby Boomers and Generation Jones), staple dishes that were served at the dinner table are being rediscovered on Reddit by newer generations looking for filling, comforting, and affordable meals.

According to JSTOR, actress Liza Minelli first coined "comfort food" back in 1970. Minelli told food columnist Johna Blinn, "Comfort food is anything you just yum, yum, yum."

Meals from the 1970s are nostalgic and also budget friendly. Try making one of these comforting recipes from Redditors that will fill you up and not break the bank.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Tuna casserole

"I LITERALLY made a tuna casserole last night & had the leftovers for lunch today." - Disastrous-Soup-5413, RogerClyneIsAGod2

Turkey (or chicken) tetrazzini

"Tetrazzini is a creamy pasta dish with turkey (or chicken) chicken, mushrooms, and cheese." - Disastrous-Soup-5413

Liver and onions

"Liver and onions, mashed potatoes and a green salad made with iceberg lettuce, tomatoes cut in wedges, cucumber slices .. peeled and miracle whip salad dressing." - Kaktusblute

Quiche Lorraine

"A family favorite quiche recipe from the 1970’s. The secret? Half a cup of mayonnaise and an unreasonable quantity of cheese. My mom uses sweet onion instead of green onion, but otherwise made as written:

1/2 c. real mayonnaise
1/2 c. milk
2 eggs
1 Tbsp. corn starch
1 1/2 c. cubed cooked ham
1 1/2 c. (about 1/2 pound) chopped Swiss cheese
1/3 c. sliced green onion
Dash pepper
1 unbaked 9" pastry shell

Mix together real mayonnaise, milk, eggs and corn starch until smooth. Stir in ham, cheese, onion and pepper. Turn into pastry shell. Bake in 350 degree Fahrenheit oven 35-40 minutes until golden brown on top and knife inserted comes out clean." - banoctopus

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Cheese fondue

"For fondue, you can go in a few different directions. Cubed crusty bread is one of the classic ways to dip into cheese fondue, but you could use fruits, vegetables, chunks of cooked or cured sausages, so long as they will keep their structural integrity." - Bluecat72

Meatloaf and baked potatoes

"A basic meatloaf is ground beef, minced onions, bread crumbs, an egg and a squirt of ketchup for moisture, salt, pepper, garlic powder.. whatever you like. Get your hands in there and squish it all together until thoroughly mixed. Form into a vague loaf shape on a pan and bake at 350 for an hour. Poke a couple potatoes with a fork and cook them in the microwave for 5-7 minutes. Enjoy a meatloaf sandwich with mustard for lunch the next day 😋." - yblame

Pork chops with rice and cream of mushroom soup

"Brown the chops, take them out of the pan, pour in rice, soup and water, stir to combine. Put the pork chops on top. Cover and simmer for 20 minutes or until rice is cooked. Tossed green salad: iceberg lettuce, chopped scallions, tomatoes, cucumbers, Wishbone Italian Dressing." - hicjacket

Salmon croquettes

"Salmon croquettes were a staple of my childhood. Canned salmon, saltine crackers, and an egg. We called them croquettes but naw, they were shaped into salmon patties." - DazzlingBullfrog9, throwawaytodaycat

Mexican casserole

"Brown ground beef, stir in a can of tomato sauce and 1 sliced green onion. Mix together a cup of sour cream, a cup of cottage cheese and a can of chopped green chilies. In a 9x13 pan, layer crushed tortilla chips, meat, cream mixture and grated Colby-jack or Colby cheese. Repeat layers. Bake until hot and bubbly." - Open-Gazelle1767

Hamburger Stroganoff

"One pound ground beef, 1 package Lipton onion soup mix, 1 can cream of mushroom or chicken soup, sour cream. Brown the ground beef, stir in the can of soup and soup mix. Stir in the sour cream until it looks right...I think it's a half pint, but maybe a whole pint. Serve over rice for the 2 kids who eat rice and egg noodles for the one kid who doesn't." - Open-Gazelle1767

Shake 'N Bake Chicken

"Shake’n Bake chicken or pork chops. 'And I helped!' Preheat oven to 400F. Moisten chicken with water. Place breasts in Shake-n-Bake shaker bag. Shake the bag vigorously to coat the chicken. Bake for 20 minutes if boneless, 45 minutes if it does have bones." - Karin58

@allrecipes

Where are all the Shake n Bake girlies? 🍗 Today @nicolesperfectbite is showing you how to make this classic bread coating at home—and dare we say better than the original? 👀 #instafood #food #foodie #shakenbake #bake #chicken #breadcrumbs #paprika #garlic #onion #powder #meat #breading #bread #easy #easyrecipe #recipe #quickandeasy #weeknightdinner

Grilled cheese and tomato soup

"Still my favorite thing to eat, but now I make my own tomato bisque, my own bread, and use Gouda or cheddar. Back then Mom made this for Friday lunch: Campbell's tomato soup (made with milk) and the grilled cheese was two slices of five-loaves-for-a-dollar white bread with Velveeta, grilled with Miami Maid margarine in the Revere Ware skillet." - Mindless_Pop_632, mulberryred

Pork sausage and rice

"I grew up in the 70s and my mother made this sausage and rice dish at least once a month. The recipe is from Peg Bracken's I Hate To Cook Book. Crumble 1 to 1 1/2 pounds of pork sausage (hamburger will do, but pork is better) into a skillet and brown it. Pour off the fat. Add:

1 green pepper, chopped
2 green onions, chopped
2 or 3 celery stalks, chopped
2 c. chicken consommé or bouillon
1 c. raw rice
1 tbsp. Worcestershire sauce
1/2 tsp. salt

Put on the lid and let it simmer at lowest possible heat for 1 hour." - officerbirb

Sloppy Joes

"Classic Sloppy Joes. My family had these regularly in the ‘70s." - ThatPtarmiganAgain

A woman holding up happy and sad face masks.

Optimists have a significant advantage in life: they see the world as full of potential, so they experience more joy, lower stress, stronger coping skills, better physical health, and greater persistence in pursuing their goals. They also have a serendipity mindset, making them more likely to take advantage of lucky breaks and fortunate circumstances. Because when you are on the lookout for positivity, more of it will come your way.

Even though life is easier for the optimist, pessimists will proudly say that they refuse to adopt that mindset because they are living in the “real world” and all of the Pollyanna stuff is garbage. However, for those who would like to change and begin to enjoy the benefits of seeing the glass as half full rather than half empty, it’s as easy as embracing the 3 Ps.

Dr. Martin Seligman, one of the founders of the positive psychology movement, says people can build a resilient, positive outlook on life through a better understanding of personalization, pervasiveness, and permanence. To put it simply, the pessimist and the optimist have opposite reactions to negative experiences, and through the 3 Ps, we can learn to react positively.

martin seligman, psychologists, us army, positive psychology, therapists Dr. Martin Seligman.via U.S. Department of Defense/Wikimedia Commons

What are Dr. Martin Seligman’s 3 Ps?

1. Personalization:

A pessimistic person tends to blame themselves whenever something unfortunate happens, thinking, “It’s all my fault.” However, the optimist sees things in their totality, recognizing that it was a series of events that led up to the situation. “A lot of things went into this moment, so it’s not entirely my fault.”

2. Pervasiveness:

A pessimist sees a mistake and thinks their entire life is a failure. But an optimist sees it as an isolated incident, and one they can probably learn from.

3. Permanence:

After the unfortunate incident, a pessimist sees it as proof that bad events are never-ending and can’t be stopped, and thinks they will never get over the setback. An optimist recognizes that everything is temporary and things will surely get better.

positive and negative, happy and sad, man on couch, optimism pessimism, A man sitting next to himself on the couch.via Canva/Photos

Now, let’s put this into practice. Let’s say that you got into a minor fender-bender where you hit the car in front of you at a stoplight.

Instead of thinking, “It’s all my fault,” and “I can’t trust myself to drive without getting into an accident, and "I will always be a terrible driver." You can think to yourself, “It wasn’t all my fault because I got distracted by something on the radio,” and “I can get better at paying attention,” so that this doesn’t happen again.

The great Henry David Thoreau once said, “The question is not what you look at, but what you see.” Optimists and pessimists are both looking at the same situation, and one is seeing it beneficially, while the other is allowing their worldview to hold them back. Sure, optimists may be a little naive to think that things will always turn out OK, But without them, we wouldn’t have anyone to try to make things better.

An angry man in front of the American flag.

America has never been a perfect place, but since the Civil War, it has been one where most people bought into the idea of the country and supported the institutions that keep it running. People may disagree on politics and culture, but when America was threatened, whether it was 9/11 or World War II, people came together to fight for the country they love, even though the reasons may have differed.

However, it’d be naive to say that sentiment is still as strong as it once was. Since The Great Recession, many people have felt that the vibes are off in America, and polls and research back those feelings. Right around 2012, when smartphones became ubiquitous, there was a considerable rise in the number of people who felt that America was on the wrong track and that racism and sexism were considerably worse than they were just a year before. There was also a big spike in mental illness.

So what happened in 2012? Did the world suddenly become drastically worse overnight, or had our perceptions been changed?

woman, dispair, smartphone, bad news, woman in kitchen, upset woman A woman is upset looking at her smartphone.via Canva/Photos

Why does it feel like America is on the decline?

Other developed countries have experienced similar vibe shifts since 2012, but it has hit America the hardest. Economics blogger Noah Smith explains why this feeling of malaise has hit America so hard, and he illustrates it perfectly in a viral Substack piece called “Social media destroyed one of America's key advantages.” Smith is an American blogger and commentator on economics and current events and former assistant professor of behavioral finance at Stony Brook University.

In his Substack post, Smith postulates that the technological change hit America the hardest because it punctured our geographical buffers. “A hippie in Oakland and a redneck in the suburbs of Houston both fundamentally felt that they were part of the same unified nation; that nation looked very different to people in each place,” Smith writes. “Californians thought America was California, and Texans thought America was Texas, and this generally allowed America to function.”

Why did America fundamentally change in 2012?

Here’s an excerpt from Smith’s piece. Please check out the entire piece on the Noahpinion Substack.

Like some kind of forcible hive mind out of science fiction, social media suddenly threw every American in one small room with every other American. Decades of hard work spent running away from each other and creating our ideologically fragmented patchwork of geographies went up in smoke overnight, as geography suddenly ceased to mediate the everyday discussion of politics and culture.

The sudden collapse of geographic sorting in political discussion threw all Americans in the same room with each other — and like the characters in Sartre’s No Exit, they discovered that “Hell is other people.” Conservatives suddenly discovered that a lot of Americans despise Christianity or resent White people over the legacy of discrimination. Liberals suddenly remembered that a lot of their countrymen frown on their lifestyles. Every progressive college kid got to see every piece of right-wing fake news that their grandparents were sharing on Facebook (whereas before, these would have been quietly confined to chain emails). Every conservative in a small town got to see Twitter activists denouncing White people. And so on.


protests, american protest, protest sign, demonstration, mass gathering A group of people protesting in the street.via Ted Eytan/Flickr

It may sound cynical to believe that America was a better place when people were less likely to talk to people with a different worldview. But, given how things have gone in the past 15 years, it’s fair to say that putting every American in a proverbial ring to fight it out just makes everyone feel under attack... and the fight never ends.

The problem with the Like button

Another development around the same time that many believe negatively affected the country was the development of the Like button on Facebook. The button made its debut in 2009, and it, along with the share button, which came in 2010, incentivized people to create content that their audience agreed with, creating echo chambers. The buttons also incentivized people to make outrage-provoking posts and create fake stories to go viral and increase advertising revenue.

maga, trump supporters, trump flags, trump rally, american flags Trump supporters at a rally.via Elvert Barnes/Flickr

The positive takeaway from Smith’s geographical sorting theory is that, quite possibly, many people’s perceptions about life in Amerca are wrong because we’re seeing it through the distorted, funhouse mirror of social media that shows us every bad deed in a country of 330 million people and amplifies the voices of the unscroupulous. By pinpointing the moment that America “went to hell,” as author Jonathan Haidt says, we also have a roadmap to get back to when people had greater faith in America’s institutions and people.

This article originally appeared in June.

Photo credit: Canva
Mailman reveals his massive paycheck to recruit others

No matter how often we encounter them, people often overlook the "people in our neighborhood" as Mister Rogers would call them. Their presence is so common that we don't always notice them until they're gone for a day or two. These are people like school bus drivers, sanitation workers, delivery drivers, and postal workers. Of course people know they exist and that they're there to do a job but because their presence is sort of in the background of daily life we may not give their jobs much thought.

There's the thought that "someone has to do it" when it comes to the service they provide but sometimes that "someone" is you. Or at least it could be you, especially after hearing how much one of those jobs pays. It's a common misconception that work like sanitation or postal service is menial and low paying, but the truth is that this essential work can be quite lucrative in the right circumstances.

A mailman that works for the U.S. Postal Service decided to share his paycheck with social media in an attempt to help the post office recruit more mail carriers.

The post office continues to have a shortage in mail carriers in certain areas, especially in rural settings. This shortage causes delays in receiving mail and longer hours for current mail carriers. While the post office has been working to fill in the gaps by doing more hiring, it still isn't enough with the large number of USPS workers that are nearing retirement. It seems to be a constant struggle to keep an adequate amount of mail carriers throughout the areas that need them most.

mailman paycheck, mail carriers pay, job market, job hunting, mailman shares check, pay transparency, jobs, economy The pay is good and you get to drive this sweet truck around! Photo by Joel Moysuh on Unsplash

One of the barriers to people applying to the Postal Service may be that they don't know they're hiring since some people may see mail carriers as background characters.

Another concern may be that people are not sure if they can make a livable wage working for the post office, but that's where Lukas' video can help fill in the blanks.

In response to viewers not believing he actually made six figures, the Missouri mailman and TikTok creator shares a screenshot of his paycheck showing he brings home $4,423.09 every other week, which averages out to just over $100K a year.

Being fully transparent, Lukas shares that his paycheck includes 23 hours of overtime due to the extra hours he has to work from being short staffed.

mailman paycheck, mail carriers pay, job market, job hunting, mailman shares check, pay transparency, jobs, economy Nothing warms the heart more than a mail carrier being truly embraced by their community. Giphy

"On one of my previous videos somebody said, 'prove it' on one of my checks, so here's one of my last checks. As you can see, the overtime hours, plus my normal pay all equals up to $4,423...so, and that's for two weeks of work. I'm working too much but if you were to multiply that by 26 weeks that's over $100,000. We need help and the post office pays well," he says.

Lukas reiterates throughout his video that the post office is hiring and they need help desperately but the comments were mixed on if working at the post office was a good move.

@lukasthegiant

We're Hiring and Yes, We Pay Well. In some cases, over 100k!#greenscreen #werehiring #paidwell #tallestmailman #needhelp #getpaid #100k #usps #apply

"I mean he’s technically making 25.00 hourly and $38 for each hour of OT. You’re forgetting the minimum wage in majority of states is 7.25," one person writes.

"Post office is recession safe. Been there 30 years," another commenter shares.

Someone else chimes in, "been working at the post office for 5 years just made regular. it is not easy when you start but once you know how to do it it's a BREEZE."

mailman paycheck, mail carriers pay, job market, job hunting, mailman shares check, pay transparency, jobs, economy US Mail is not for sale, says the postal workers union. Photo by Ethan Hoover on Unsplash

A former postal worker reveals, "I worked there 6 years and had no life. Worked 12 + hrs for 7 days a week. I wasted most of my 20s working. NO THANK YOU!!!!, before adding. "When I started years ago it was $15 an hr when I left it was $25."

To be fair, while Lukas is doing well for himself (and working quite hard for the money), a lot of the mail carrier shortages are being caused in part by wages that don't cover the cost of living in certain areas. So there's definitely room for improvement, and the American Postal Workers Union is fighting for higher pay and better hours all the time.

Did you know that the postal service is a staggering 250 years old? For a good chunk of the last several of those years, politicians and corporations have been obsessed with the idea of privatizing the whole operation and siphoning as much profit out of it as possible.

Just imagine how many billions of dollars private companies could make by charging way higher prices for shipping! The idea may be salivating to investors and billionaires, but not to regular folks who just want to be able to affordably and reliably mail letters and packages.

The American Postal Workers Union has been actively and aggressively fighting against this potentially catastrophic change. Not only would it hurt regular Americans, but mail carriers like Lukas who have carved out a solid and honest career doing essential community work.

The post office seems to be much like any other job. Some people have a great experience working there while others do not, but if someone is looking for a chance at a new career that offers retirement benefits, it sounds like USPS could be a place to land.

This article originally appeared in January. It has been updated.

Truly a once in a lifetime talent.

When we think of badass, alt rock icons of the 90s, few are as singular and unique as Dolores O’Riordan, who gave The Cranberries its signature sound, and who was once described as having "the voice of a saint trapped in a glass harp.”

It wasn’t just that O’Riordan flawlessly blended traditional Celtic singing techniques like lilting and keening into rock music (which in itself is an amazing feat) but that her performances never compromised emotional authenticity for the sake of aesthetics. The result, as any fan will tell you, was something both ethereal and raw all at the same time.

the cranberries linger song Dolores O'Riordan had a singularly unique voice Giphy

So it should probably be of no surprise that in this resurfaced clip, presumably from the late 90s, O’Riordan’s stunning cover of Fleetwood Mac’s “Go Your Own Way” is every bit as magical. As @oldmansrock, the account that posted the video, wrote, “the way that Dolores could challenge the pitch but still stay on key, that is the mark of an accomplished singer. It sounds dissonant compared to the manufactured material of today, where every tone is perfect, but hers is oh so human, and so very Irish! It is beautiful!”

But don’t just take their word for it. Watch:


If this had you wanting to pull up a Cranberries playlist on your Spotify to listen to for the rest of the day, you're not alone. Down in the comments, the renewed love for O’Riordan was palpable.

“What sits deep with me is that no one sounds like her. Her voice is unmistakable. Whatever her take on a song/lyric? It was authentically, soul-touching Dolores.

“She was unbelievably talented and the cranberries are criminally underrated.”

“Her Irish vocal sweep ups are amazing.”

ireland, irish, irish flag, shamrock The Cranberries hailed from Limerick, Ireland. Giphy GIF by Curtains Cool

“She was just brilliant!!! Incredibly talented as well as a lovely and kind human being. I love and miss her. I don't know how anyone can have a bad word to say about this. I thought it was brilliant, both her live cover and studio cover. I wish people weren't so stubborn. I can accept covers no problem if the singer is talented enough, and she most certainly is. ❤️”

“A keening Irish queen. Her voice will always stir me.”

“An actual once in a generation talent.”

“Also a master of the microphone. She knows exactly where the sweet spot is for every note.”

“She could melt your heart with that voice, or completely blow you away. Missed dearly, but never forgotten. ❤️”

the cranberries, dolores o'riordan, music, irish bands Dolores O'Riordan in 2007 upload.wikimedia.org

This cover would go on to be a part to the Cranberries’ third album, To The Faithful Departed, which was released in 1996 and became the band’s highest-charting album on the US Billboard 200, and was praised for its darker tone as well as its themes of grief and loss.

After O’Riordan died from drowning due to alcohol intoxication in January 2018, the Cranberries would disband in 2019, but they released their final album, In the End, that year. It was comprised of some of O'Riordan's unfinished demo tapes.

While O’Riordan met the same tragic fate that befalls many artists, especially those in the music industry, her spirit lives on in her art. Because she put so much of herself into her craft, even bite-sized clips of her performances, many years later, inspire those who listen to it. That’s something worth celebrating.

By the way, you can catch a full video of the cover below.

- YouTube youtu.be

This article originally appeared in February.