upworthy
Add Upworthy to your Google News feed.
Google News Button
Family

Dad found out his son bullied a kid at school and came up with a brilliant teaching moment

"I told him that we have the opportunity to make things right."

screenshot of man speaking to camera beside comments
@thehalfdeaddad/TikTok

Dad on TikTok shared how he addressed his son's bullying.

What do you do when you find out your kid bullied someone? For many parents, the first step is forcing an apology. While this response is of course warranted, is it really effective? Some might argue that there are more constructive ways of handling the situation that teach a kid not only what they did wrong, but how to make things right again.

Single dad Patrick Forseth recently shared how he made a truly teachable moment out of his son, Lincoln, getting into trouble for bullying. Rather than forcing an apology, Forseth made sure his son was actively part of a solution.

The thought process behind his decision, which he explained in a now-viral TikTok video, is both simple and somewhat radical compared to how many parents have been encouraged to handle similar situations.

“I got an email a few days ago from my 9-year-old son's teacher that he had done a ‘prank’ to a fellow classmate and it ended up embarrassing the classmate and hurt his feelings,” the video begins.

At this point, Forseth doesn’t split hairs. “I don't care who you are, that's bullying,” he said. “If you do something to somebody that you know has the potential end result of them being embarrassed in front of a class or hurt—you’re bullying.”

So, Forseth and Lincoln sat down for a long talk (a talk, not a lecture) about appropriate punishment and how it would have felt to be on the receiving end of such a prank.

From there, Forseth told his son that he would decide how to make things right, making it a masterclass in taking true accountability.

“I demanded nothing out of him. I demanded no apology, I demanded no apology to the teacher,” he continued, adding, “I told him that we have the opportunity to go back and make things right. We can't take things back, but we can try to correct things and look for forgiveness.”

@thehalfdeaddad Replying to @sunshinyday1227 And then it’s my kid 🤦‍♂️😡 #endbullyingnow #talktoyourkidsmore #dadlifebestlife #singledadsover40 #teachyourchildren #ReadySetLift ♬ Get You The Moon - Kina

So, what did Lincoln do? He went back to his school and actually talked to the other boy he pranked. After learning that they shared a love of Pokémon, he then went home to retrieve two of his favorite Pokémon cards as a peace offering, complete with a freshly cleaned case.

Lincoln would end up sharing with his dad that the other boy was so moved by the gesture that he would end up hugging him.

“I just want to encourage all parents to talk to your kids,” Forseth concluded. “Let's try to avoid just the swat on the butt [and] send them to their room. Doesn't teach them anything.”

In Forseth’s opinion, kids get far more insight by figuring out how to resolve a problem themselves. “That's what they're actually going to face in the real world once they move out of our nests.”

He certainly has a point. A slap on the wrist followed by being marched down somewhere to say, “I’m sorry,” only further humiliates kids most of the time. With this gentler approach, kids are taught the intrinsic value of making amends after wrongdoing, not to mention the power of their own autonomy. Imagine that—blips in judgment can end up being major character-building moments.

Kudos to this dad and his very smart parenting strategy.


This article originally appeared three years ago.

From Your Site Articles
fatherhood
FamilyParenting
Pop Culture

15 years ago, a Russian gymnast was interrupted by her 2-year-old daughter. It became a historic performance.

"This is beyond beautiful. 🥲"

dance, motherhood, mommy daughter dance, mother daughter relationship, parenting, wholesome
Umi4ika/Youtube

Svetlana Putintseva with her daughter Masha.

In 2005 at only 18 years old, Russian rhythmic gymnast Svetlana Putintseva became a world champion, after which she retired and eventually became a mom. Then, in 2011, Putintseva came out of retirement for one special Gala performance.

Little did anyone know that her then two-year-old daughter named Masha would be the key to making that performance so special.

As the story goes, the young child refused to leave her side that night. But rather than stopping the performance, Putintseva did what so many incredible moms do: she masterfully held space for two different identities.

As we see in the video below, Putintseva simply brought Masha onto the dance floor and incorporated her into the routine—holding and comforting her at times, performing impressive moves while she ran around at others…letting it all become a lively, endearing interaction rather than a rote routine. It became something really touching:

Watch:

Now, a bit of fact-checking as this video has once again started going viral. Despite what many captions say, Putintseva‘s daughter was likely always a planned part of the performance (the tiny leotard is a bit of a giveaway). But that doesn’t really take away from the message behind it: motherhood weaves another soul into one's identity, forever. And one of the biggest lessons it teaches is how to hold someone else steady, all while becoming ourselves.

Every day, moms are engaging in a similar type of “dance”: navigating through the world while guiding and nurturing their little ones. It probably doesn't always feel quite as graceful as what Putintseva put out, and, yet, it is just as beautiful.

dance, motherhood, mommy daughter dance, mother daughter relationship, parenting, wholesome A mother hugging her daughter.Photo credit: Canva

Maybe so many thought it was an improvised moment because improvising is a very real parent superpower. That’s certainly the takeaway we get from some of these lovely comments:

“You cannot control life but you can learn to dance with it. 🤍”

"This is beyond beautiful. 🥲"

“If this isn't a metaphor for motherhood. We improvise so much.”

“A mother’s unconditional love 🥹❤️ She just made my whole month.”

“I do this sometimes while deejaying. My daughter comes up so I hit the slicer and let her chop it up. A few chops and she is happy and goes about her business. 🥰”

“I can see my daughter doing this to me soon whenever I get up on stage on perform. She already stares long and hard at me whenever I am onnstage singing. She doesn't take her eyes off me. Sure she would be running up to stand with me when she starts walking 😂😂 i look forward to it tho”

“Sobbing 😭😭😭😭 As a dancer who hasn’t performed since having a kid, this inspires me in so many ways 🥹🥹 So beautiful and it’s clear that she admires her mom so much 🥰”

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Though not much is written on Putintseva following this performance, one blog post says that Masha has followed in her footsteps by getting into rhythmic gymnastics. Maybe it all started with this one performance. ❤️

From Your Site Articles
wholesome
Pop CultureInternet
Education & Information

Immigration attorney breaks down convoluted immigration process, leaving Americans flabbergasted

"It’s Shoots & Ladders, with only Shoots and no Ladders."

immigration; ICE; work visa; immigrate to America; immigration attorney; how immigration works
Photo credit: Canva

Immigration attorney breaks down convoluted immigration process, leaving Americans flabbergasted

America is the land of immigrants. It's something that the country has boasted since the first boats arrived on Ellis Island more than 130 years ago. In school, kids are taught that, due to the diverse immigrant communities, the country is a salad bowl or melting pot of cultures. Like a salad where every added ingredient maintains its original colors, flavors, and shapes, to make something delicious when consumed together, immigrants do the same for America.

Telling their family's American origin story is a point of pride for many, but since the country is just shy of 250 years old, the majority of Americans have been on the land for generations. Their family's immigration story is one from the distant past, which means the average American has no idea how the immigration process works in modern times. Immigration attorney Kathleen Martinez teamed up with immigration consultant Alejandro Martinez to show exactly how immigration works in America today.

immigration; ICE; work visa; immigrate to America; immigration attorney; how immigration works Statue of Liberty stands tall against a cloudy sky.Photo credit: Canva

The process seems to be entirely convoluted with a lot of unnecessary hurdles and vague instructions that shock the conscience of viewers. After being asked by Alejandro what it means to "do it legally," Kathleen stands in front of a whiteboard with multiple squiggly lines and phrases to represent different steps in the process.

"When other people tell immigrants to 'do it legally,' what they're referring to is how they enter the country. So let's talk about entering legally," Kathleen says. "So let's say that you entered on a visa, right? Let's say that your visa is not expired, so that means that you're still in legal status. You're good. You're still legal, right? So let's say you're going to adjust status to a green card through an employer, well, it depends. Are you with an employer who will actually petition for you a green card, then possibly you did the entire thing legally."

immigration; ICE; work visa; immigrate to America; immigration attorney; how immigration works Visa application essentials: form, pen, and travel preparation.Photo credit: Canva

That's about as simple a process as you can get, if you're lucky, but most people immigrating through a work visa do not fall into that category. Kathleen explains that the next option is a work visa that enters into a lottery system, which is common for H1B visas given out on a limited basis by the government. Being entered into the lottery system to transition from a work visa to a green card means getting a green card is left up to chance.

If your number is pulled, congratulations! No, you don't get a green card. You get to move to the next step, called the Visa Bulletin. "When you're in the Visa Bulletin, depending on what country you're from, it could take you up to 25 years to get your green card. So yeah, you did the entire thing legally. You won. You got the lottery, but oh no, you have to wait another 25 years and be undocumented in the United States in order to get your green card," Kathleen explains.

That confusing bit was only one way to become a permanent resident in the United States; there's more. The immigration attorney then shares how the process works if you're working in America on a temporary work visa. "You're on a temporary visa, meaning that you were supposed to return, or it expired. Now you're on the expired status pile. You are not here, no longer doing it legally, although you did enter legally, which is so weird. So now you need to look at other options because if you're on expired status, you're no longer going through an employer."

If someone's temporary work visa expires, and they can't afford to go back to their home country, or they don't want to due to building a life in America, options become even more confusing. According to Kathleen, the options are limited. If the immigrant is married to a U.S. citizen, their spouse can petition the government for a green card. The same is true if their child is a U.S. citizen over the age of 21, or if they're the child of a U.S. citizen and they themselves are under 21 years of age.

immigration; ICE; work visa; immigrate to America; immigration attorney; how immigration works Job interview conversation with a candidate and employer at a desk.Photo credit: Canva

If an immigrant doesn't fit into one of those three categories, another relative, like a sibling, can petition for them, but that will put them into the Visa Bulletin. Keep in mind, this entire time, this hypothetical immigrant is still undocumented, though they originally entered legally. If they don't have any family members to petition for them, they can try the humanitarian route through T Visas or U Visas, which would allow them to enter the lottery. The immigration attorney still was not done explaining the long, difficult process.

People were unprepared for how ridiculously confusing the entire immigration process is. One person writes, "It’s Shoots & Ladders, with only Shoots and no Ladders."

Another laments, "There’s no sane reason it should be this complicated if all I had to do was to be born here."

immigration; ICE; work visa; immigrate to America; immigration attorney; how immigration works "Welcome to the USA: A new journey begins with a green card."Photo credit: Canva

"It’s soo wild how many hoops you gotta jump with our immigration system. Even for my mom when she applied for citizenship, and I’m talking like about 50 years or so ago, it wasn’t as bad, from what she tells me, it has definitely changed a lot over the years," someone else shares.

This person's mind was blown, "Bro, I thought I knew. I had NO idea."

One person points out, "And then there’s DACA, people who were brought here as kids. There’s no pathway for them."

"Can you do one simply explaining how HARD it is to get a tourist visa? My sister and I have dreamed of visiting NYC since we were kids. We're almost 30 now, and the tourist visa process takes about two years just to get interviewed about every possible private-life detail, get all our paperwork, phones, texts, and bodies examined, tons of pesos required, and the turnover rate is SO HIGH. I promise we would NEVER stay in the US," someone else shares.

From Your Site Articles
immigration
Education & InformationEducation
Pets

6th grader's science fair project answers age-old question: 'Do cat buttholes touch everything?'

The world needs to know.

cats; pets; cat lovers; cat parents; cats on counters; cat butts, pets, animals, humor, funny, science
Photo courtesy of Kerry Hyde

Do cat buttholes touch every surface they sit on? Science answers.

Cat owners are a special breed. Sometimes when dealing with feline friends, they have unique questions that even Google can't seem to answer. This is probably the sole reason cat forums exist, but in 2021, one kid who needed a 6th grade science project decided to skip the cat forums for answers and instead use the scientific method. Kaeden Henry, then a sixth grader, bravely pondered a question few (if any) have been brave enough to ask: do cat buttholes touch every surface they sit on?

Since cats do whatever the heck they want, training them not to jump on kitchen counters is a feat even Hercules struggles to complete. These fierce felines don't care if you're cooking dinner or trying to get comfy in bed. If they want to sit somewhere, they're going to do it. The thought of cat butts on that expensive Serta pillow designed to feel like you're sleeping on a cloud can gross people out, but thanks to Kaeden, you no longer have to wonder if the butthole itself is also making contact.

cats; pets; cat lovers; cat parents; cats on counters; cat butts, pets, animals, humor, funny, science The scientific method as it was meant to be used. Courtesy of Kerry Hyde

The curious sixth grader was homeschooled and well-versed in the scientific method thanks to his mother's PhD in animal behavior with a concentration in feline behavior. And, since they own cats, the science experiment was pretty straightforward (and directly impactful).

The experiment

To complete the experiment, Henry and his mom, Kerry Hyde, bought non-toxic lipstick and applied it to each of their cat's anuses. Then, the cats were given commands.

cats; pets; cat lovers; cat parents; cats on counters; cat butts, pets, animals, humor, funny, science What are you planning on doing with that lipstick?Courtesy of Kerry Hyde

"Non-toxic lipstick was applied to their bum-bums, they were then given a series of commands (sit, wait, lie down, and jump up. Side note: Both cats have been trained since kittenhood with a variety of commands, they also know how to high-five, spin around, and speak.), they were compensated with lots of praise, pets, and their favorite treats, and the lipstick was removed with a baby wipe once we collected our data in just under 10 minutes," Hyde wrote in a Facebook post.

The results? Turns out that, no, cat buttholes do not touch every surface cats sit on

Now, let's all take a collective sigh of relief while we go over the details. Kaeden's experiment covered long-haired, short-haired, and medium-haired cats (if your cat is hairless, you better stock up on Clorox wipes just in case).


"His results and general findings: Long and medium haired cat’s buttholes made NO contact with soft or hard surfaces at all. Short haired cats made NO contact on hard surfaces. But we did see evidence of a slight smear on the soft bedding surface. Conclusion, if you have a short haired cat and they may be lying on a pile of laundry, an unmade bed, or other soft uneven surface, then their butthole MAY touch those surfaces!" Hyde shares.

Now every curious cat owner can rest easy knowing that, as long as their cat has hair, their bare bottom balloon knot is not touching the majority of surfaces in their home.

Huzzah, science!

cats; pets; cat lovers; cat parents; cats on counters; cat butts, pets, animals, humor, funny, science You want me to sit on that?Courtesy of Kerry Hyde

The amusing experiment caught the Internet's attention. People laughed and commented, with one person writing, "This is probably the most useful information I’ve learned from a science fair project."

"Good to know!...I can now eat my sandwich left on the counter with confidence!" another writes.

cats; pets; cat lovers; cat parents; cats on counters; cat butts, pets, animals, humor, funny, science High five for an A+! Courtesy of Kerry Hyde

"A+++!!! Whew!! I am very grateful for your sciencing on this subject. My fears from walking in on my cat sitting on my laptop keyboard and subsequently being grossed out and cleaning furiously in a hyper-ocd manner have been somewhat allayed and now maybe I won’t have to use QUIIITE so many wipes." someone chimes in.

"Finally.. Someone answers the important questions!!"

The best part of the story? Even with her Ph.D. in animal behavior, specializing in feline behavior, Kerry learned something new. The power of science!

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

From Your Site Articles
science experiment
PetsJoy
Pop Culture

Gen Zers try, and hilariously fail, to guess Gen X movies after hearing one famous line

"My name is Inigo Montoya."– Zorro

gen z, gen x, gen x movies, gen zers watch gen x movies, classic movies, movies, pop culture
via @larrylexicon/Instagram used iwth permission

Well this was painful to watch.

It’s no secret Gen Zers aren’t necessarily the biggest fans of Gen X movies. Many parents eagerly await the day to finally blow the dust off that Dead Poets Society or Sixteen Candles VHS, only to find that their kids doesn't hold quite the same shine to it. And, let’s be honest, neither do we a lot of the time once we rewatch through a more modern lens.

But it’s another thing entirely for them to have no earthly idea what some of the biggest, most quotable movies of the '80s and '90s are, period.

Recently, a teacher who goes by Larry Lexicon on Instagram asked his class to guess the name of a classic Gen X movie using only one iconic quote from it. Here were some of the quotes:

“Nobody puts baby in a corner.”

“I feel the need. The need for speed.“

“Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”

“Yipee ki yay”

“I want my two dollars.”

“If you build it, they will come.”

Now, you and I both know that these lines are from Dirty Dancing, Top Gun, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Die Hard, Better Off Dead, and Field of Dreams. But these kiddos had no idea. They couldn't even begin to guess where these quotes came from. Nothing but blank stares.

But what’s even funnier were the, ahem, creative reaches some other students had.

For instance, one kid guessed that the line “Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die,” was from Zorro (the answer is, of course, The Princess Bride).

Another said “Come with me if you want to live” was from Impractical Jokers (it’s from Terminator), while a third guessed that, rather than Karate Kid, “Sweep the leg!” is from Legally Blonde. (Although, that student admitted it’s because she thought of “bend and snap.”)

@primevideoca bend... and SNAP! 🙂↕️ #LegallyBlonde #ReeseWitherspoon #JenniferCoolidge ♬ original sound - Prime Video Canada 🇨🇦

One kid even had the audacity to say that “It’s the car, right? Chicks dig the car,” was from Stranger Things, which is both hilarious and also kind of makes sense when you think about it.

There was actually only one correct guess in the entire bunch: “What are you looking at, butthead?” is from Back to the Future, but that’s only because this kiddo got help from an offscreen classmate. So really, it was one big goose egg.

While many in the comments joked that this was a result of “parental failure," another content creator by the name of “The Treehouse Detective” surmised that the real reason Gen Zers generally aren't as knowledgeable about the pop culture that happened before they were born as their predecessors is that they grew up with streaming services instead of cable.

@treehousedetective The real reason millennials know more about movies and tv before they were born than Gen Z #movies #television #millennials #genz #filmtok ♬ original sound - Treehouse Detective

Treehouse Detective explained: "In the '80s and '90s, when cable programming really exploded, many networks began creating singular channels meant to focus only on certain genres. Cartoon Network played only cartoons, Comedy Central played only comedy, and so on. But networks still had to fill 24 hours worth of content, and thus would buy old libraries of movies and TV shows, otherwise known as "reruns,” and fill their slots that way. So, millennial kids were passively being educated about older forms of entertainment.

The same can certainly not be said about Gen Z or Gen Alpha kids, who have access to exponentially more content, not to mention more mediums in which to receive that content. So it’s understandable that they might not feel motivated to watch a “B movie from the '70s,” argued Treehouse Detective.

So, what does this mean? Will we never be able to connect through movie quotes again? Is it only memes now? Is cinema dead? Perhaps. But while we might not have the same monoculture of yesteryear, maybe we’ll find solace in throwing around quotes from our favorite modern-day shows with our close group of friends. We’ll bond with the youngsters some other way.

From Your Site Articles
humor
Pop CultureMovies
Science

Her groundbreaking theory on the origin of life was rejected 15 times. Then biology proved her right.

Lynn Margulis had the audacity to challenge Darwin. And we're lucky she did.

lynn margulis, lynn margulis symbiosis, biology, scientific breakthroughs, darwin, darwinism, women in science
Facts That Will Blow Your Mind/Facebook

A photo of Lynn Margulis.

Throughout her prolific and distinguished career, biologist Lynn Margulis made several groundbreaking contributions to science that we take for granted as common knowledge today. For example, she championed James E. Lovelock’s “Gaia concept,” which posited that the Earth self-regulates to maintain conditions for life.

But by far, her most notable theory was symbiogenesis. While it was first written off as “strange” and “aesthetically pleasing” but “not compelling,” it would ultimately prevail, and completely rewrite how we viewed the origin of life itself.

In the late 1960s, Margulis wrote a paper titled "On the Origin of Mitosing Cells," that was quite avant-garde. In it, she proposed a theory: that life evolved through organisms merging together to become inseparable.

In essence, cooperation is the driver of life, not competition and domination. This directly went against Darwin’s “survival of the fittest” principle that was considered gospel in scientific circles. Margulis’ paper was rejected by fifteen journals before getting accepted into the Journal of Theoretical Biology.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Time would be on Margulis’ side, however. By the late ‘70s and early ‘80s, research proved that the two major building blocks of plants and animals, chloroplasts and mitochondria were at one time independent bacteria. This solidified the fact that on a biological level, connection trumps autonomy for longevity. And now that fact is written in textbooks, with no real story of the adversity it overcame to get there.

While it is customary for most new scientific theories to be met with criticism, especially those that completely shift the current narrative, many have noted that sexism played a key part in Margulis’ initial lack of acceptance. On more than one occasion, she herself had hinted that women were seen as mothers and wives first, and scientists second. She recalled that while married to fellow scientist Carl Sagan that “Carl would finish his sentence, unperturbed” while she was expected to “handle all the duties of a 1950s housewife, from washing dishes to paying the household bills.”

And yet, Margulis would have other ideas that were controversial that had nothing to do with her gender. Most famously, she did not believe that AIDS was caused by HIV, and instead believed it was cause by a syphilis-causing type of bacteria, despite there already being decades of research proving otherwise. That view was seen as an endorsement of AIDS denialism, which undermined prevention and treatment effort. Then later in life, Margulis became a vocal proponent of 9/11 conspiracy theories suggesting government involvement the in Twin Towers attacks.

And yet, perhaps this is one of those “you gotta take the good with the bad” situations. Margulis’ inherent contrarian nature gave us both these unfounded, even harmful stances, in addition to entirely new paradigms that altered our understanding of life itself.

And if nothing else, it illuminated the need for science to include multiple points of view in order to unlock the truth. It seems life is, after all, about coming together.

From Your Site Articles
history
ScienceNature
Trending Stories