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They thought their son lived an isolated life. But when he died, friends showed up in droves.

Mats Steen's parents were shocked to learn their severely disabled son had lived a rich, independent life they knew nothing about.

Netflix/YouTube

Mats Steen lived a secret life that his family only discovered after he died.

Mats Steen was only 25 years old when he passed away, his body succumbing to the genetic disease that had slowly taken his mobility since childhood. He'd lived in a wheelchair since his early teens, and by his 20s, his physical abilities had deteriorated to the point of only being able to move his fingers. He could push buttons and use a mouse, and he spent nearly all of his waking hours playing video games in his parents' basement.

His family loved him and cared for him through it all, giving him as much of a normal life as they could. But they also lamented everything they knew he'd missed out on. "Our deepest sorrow lay in the fact that he would never experience friendships, love, or to make a difference in people's lives," Mats' father shares.

Mats left behind the password to a blog he kept. Not knowing if anyone would actually read it, his parents published the news of Mats' passing in a blog post, adding their email address in case anyone wanted to reach out.

Much to their surprise, messages began pouring in from around the world—not just with condolences, but with heartfelt stories from people who called Mats their friend.

The Steens soon discovered that their son had lived a much fuller life than they'd ever imagined—one that included all the things they always wished for him.

As his online life was revealed, the family learned that Mats began his days with a routine 30-minute sprint through the forest. He frequented cafes and pubs, chatting with strangers and flirting with women. He sat by campfires having heart-to-heart conversations. He made friends and enemies. He fought heroic battles. He supported people in times of need. He gave advice that people took. He experienced his first kiss.

And he did it all as "Ibelin," his handsome, muscular avatar in the online game World of Warcraft.

- YouTubeyoutu.be

Mats' life is showcased in the documentary The Remarkable Life of Ibelin, in which his parents share the story of how they discovered their son's group of friends they didn't know he had.

People who've never played an open world roleplay game like World of Warcraft may wonder how real community can be built through it, but Mats' story proves it's possible. The friends he made through the game have shared the real influence he'd had on their real lives, from helping them with problems they were facing to empowering them to make positive changes in their relationships.

Though he never met them face-to-face, Mats' online friends say he made a significant impact on them.

A young woman Ibelin had connected with as a teenager—the one with whom he'd shared that first virtual kiss—shared that her parents had taken away her computer when they feared gaming was interfering with her studies. When she logged on at a local library, Mats gave her a letter he had written to give to her parents, encouraging them to talk with her about her gaming hobby and to work out a solution together that didn't require her to give it up completely. She printed it and gave it to them. Miraculously, it worked.

Another woman had been having a hard time connecting with her autistic son as a young adult. When she talked with Ibelin about her struggles, he suggested that she and her son start gaming together and connect in that way first. Eventually, that connection via the virtual world led to warmer in-person interactions between them—and a life-changing shift in their relationship.

"I don't think he was aware of the impact that he had done to a lot of people," the mother shared.

Mats interacted with the same online friends as Ibelin for years, going through the kinds of ups and downs all friendships experience. He kept his physical condition a secret until close to the end of his life, when he finally opened up to another player who convinced him to share his reality with the others. Some traveled from other countries to attend his funeral, with one of them speaking on the group's behalf and a few of them serving as pallbearers. Those who knew Ibelin also held a memorial in-game at his virtual gravesite—a tradition that has spread beyond just his own guild.

Typically, we think of someone escaping the real world and spending hours a day playing video games as unhealthy, but for Mats, it was a lifeline. As Ibelin, Mats was able to have a level of independence and a rich social life that simply wasn't possible for him in the offline world—an uniquely modern phenomenon that technology and human creativity have made possible.

Mats' impact on his online community was real, and 10 years after his passing his impact is spreading even further.

Duchenne muscular dystrophy (DMD), the genetic disease that Mats lived with and ultimately died from, affects 300,000 boys worldwide. It only affects males and it has no cure. But CureDuchenne, a global nonprofit dedicated to funding and finding a cure, partnered with video game company Blizzard Entertainment's World of Warcraft in Mats' honor from the end of 2024 until January 7, 2025. During that window, World of Warcraft players could purchase a limited-edition pet fox named Reven ("fox" in Norwegian). The Reven Pack, which includes a transmog backpack and Reven’s Comfy Carrier, costs $20, with 100% of the purchase price being donated to CureDuchenne.

The Reven Pack on World of Warcraft—100% of purchase cost goes to the CureDuchenne foundation.World of Warcraft/CureDuchenne

“Mats Steen lived a life in World of Warcraft that he couldn’t in the real world as he fought Duchenne muscular dystrophy alongside his incredible family, who I’m proud to have met and fallen in love with,” said Holly Longdale, executive producer of World of Warcraft. “Working with CureDuchenne for our Charity Pet Program, in honor of Mats’ memory, allows us to harness the power of our phenomenal global community to bring meaningful impact to so many lives.”

In February 2025, CureDuchenne announced that The Reven Pack raised over two million dollars in support. Later in the month, Debra and Hawken Miller of Cure Duchenne spoke with ViceVice and shared how The Reven Pack helped raise valuable awareness about Duchenne in addition to funds. For those interested in updates, the site keeps donors and supporters current on all developments in Duchenne research news.

Mats life was truly impactful in many ways and to many people. His love, kindness, and friendship touched lives and his legacy continues to help those struggling with this rare disease. According to the site, since the inception of CureDuchenne, life expectancy for those with the disease has increased by a decade and over fifty million dollars have been raised for research, education, and care.

You can learn more about Mats' story in the award-winning documentary, The Remarkable Life of Ibelin on Netflix.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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Mental Health

Researchers reveal that the one key to happiness might not be what you thought

"The single strongest predictor of happiness isn't purpose at all."

Photo by Antonino Visalli on Unsplash

Women happily frolic together amidst sunflowers.

For so long, many people have conflated the search for life's meaning with happiness. Perhaps you've seen the lonely monk in a movie, sitting atop a mountain meditating and looking for answers in solitude. While this is all very well and good (it actually really is in terms of well-being,) it simply doesn't translate to being "happy."

monk, meditation, mountain, Buddhism, searching A monk sits on top of a mountain. pxhere.com

In the "Purpose-Happiness Connection" in Psychology Today, author Jordan Grumet M.D. poses this question: "What if the key to happiness isn’t what we’ve been told?"

He then shares that for years, we believed that "finding a deep purpose in life is essential to happiness." But as it turns out, it's much simpler than that. The true key to happiness is…connection.

"One of the most robust studies on happiness, the Harvard Study of Adult Development, which has tracked participants for more than 80 years, found that the single strongest predictor of happiness isn’t purpose at all—it’s relationships."

Neuroscientist, professor, and podcast host of The Huberman Lab, Andrew Huberman is a big believer that changing one's behavior can change their thought patterns, leading to a happier brain. He interviews Dr. Laurie Santos, a professor of psychology at Yale, who states the thing you DON'T have to do is "change your circumstances." (Because well, you can't.) "Quintupling your income is tricky, moving is tricky, switching your life around all over the place is hard. And the good news is science shows you don’t have to do that. That doesn't work as well as you'd think."

"But," she says, "you can hack your behaviors and your thought patterns and your feelings to get good results. Let's talk behaviors: one of the biggest behavioral changes you can make to feel happier? Is just to get a little more social connection."

- YouTubewww.youtube.com, The Huberman Lab podcast

She continues, "Psychologists do these fun studies where they look at people's daily usage patterns. So like how much time are you spending sleeping or exercising or at work or whatever. And the two things that predict whether you're happy or not so happy is how much time you spend with friends and family members. And how much time you're just physically around other people. The more of that you do, the happier you're gonna be."

In a piece on Vox, author and writer Olga Khazan suggests that this might be bad news for some introverts. She notes a few studies on the topic, one which claims that "people who are extroverted as teenagers remain happier even when they’re 60."

It isn't that extroverts are always chattier or more attention-seeking. (As an easily drained extrovert myself, I can tell you that's not true.) It's that their energy is drawn from contact with people. With DOING things. With, that's right…connection.


introversion, reading a book, solitude, alone-time, contentA cartoon sloth reads a book alone.Giphy, GIF by SLOTHILDA

Khazan shares, "Sonja Lyubomirsky, a psychologist who has studied this phenomenon, says it’s worth focusing less on the 'extrovert' part of this and more on the fact that these individuals are more enmeshed in community. Connection is really the key to happiness." Lyubomirsky says there's hope for all. "And there are ways to square your natural introversion with the universal human need for connection. You don’t have to mingle with everyone at the office party, for instance. You can just call a trusted friend for a one-on-one conversation. Even hanging out with others and listening more than you talk can be a form of extroversion."

Grumet suggests ways to step out of one's routine no matter how one gives or receives energy. "Love painting? Join an art group. Passionate about fitness? Start working out with others. Fascinated by a niche topic? Write about it, talk about it, and connect with others who care about it, too."




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Pop Culture

Why so many people say they'd ditch modern day tech to go back to life in the 1980’s

More technology doesn’t equal happiness.

Images via Canva

A person stares longingly at a 1980s cassette caps

Technology is great. It’s wonderful to have infinite information (though not necessarily wisdom) at our fingertips. Our lives are exponentially more convenient, productive, and efficient compared to the ol’ analog days. And not for nothing—I for one love being able to take a thousand photos to get an angle I actually like, versus, clumsily mishandling a disposable camera and forever being haunted by the results.

But has it truly made our lives…better? For everything technology has given us, it has also taken away just as much. And many would consider opting for the simplicity of a bygone era.

In fact, when a viral X post asked, “would you give up your cell phone, internet, and all of the inventions of the past 35 years to live in the 1980s again?” an overwhelming amount of people came back with a resounding “yes.”

“In a heartbeat,” one person wrote, while another said, in call caps, “YES, YES, & HELL YES!”

Or course, some of this yearning might have more to do with nostalgia. The past often feels more appealing than the present because our brains filter out the bad stuff due to a process called “rosy retrospection.” So the good ol’ days seem good because of how we’re currently processing a precious memory.

You can even see a bit of this playing out in some of the comments. One person wrote, “Yes, I would have a chance to see my Dad again and tell him - that I loved him,” while another said, “Absolutely. Ditch the Iphone, give me a Walkman, and a pantry full of Pizza Rolls. I’ll be slow dancing to Phil Collins in a power suit while my VCR eats a Blockbuster rental.”

Neither of these examples truly indicate that the minimal tech era was indeed better for the whole of humanity (or even for the individual). But it does contain moments the commenters found positive. Bringing back the concept of photos, it’s akin to seeing a picture you took years ago, that you thought you looked fat in, only to now bask in how young and vibrant you were.

Still, as many experts and everyday folks can agree, the rise of technology in the age of capitalism is nonetheless a nasty combo.

As Dan Demers wrote in Forbes, “instead of streamlining and simplifying, technology has become a constant game of one-upmanship. Companies are always trying to outdo one another by cramming in more and more, without really thinking about what is absolutely essential.”

Similarly, in his online blog business strategist and author Chris Skinner noted how the prevalent presence of technology keeps up “working nonstop” and “consuming the planet.”

So, the obvious, most honest answer is, of course: technology has made our lives better…and also worse. But one could argue that it’s mainly unregulated technology + unregulated consumerism that’s the culprit. Technology is, after all, merely a tool.

This is where digital detoxes come in. Since, barring a Matrix-style takedown of all robot lifeforms, technology isn’t going anywhere, all we can really do is take control of our own consumption. Luckily, in terms of mental health, it really works.

According to the Newport Institute, there are 8 effective ways to take a break from your digital devices:

1. Dedicate chunk of your day to going offline, even if you can't commit to a full day

Most of us simply can’t completely disconnect due to work, school, or other obligations. But even an hour before bed each night can be effective.

2. Start small and work your way up

First 15 minutes each morning, then 30, then so on. Maybe you can work your way up to a full day, but no need to pressure yourself.

3. Turn off notifications

This is a big one. You can either test your restraint every time you get a little ding on phone, or you can eliminate the temptation.

4. Delete apps

Like step 3, on steroids. As the Newport Institute article notes, you can always get these apps back if you find that you do in fact need them.

4. Physically separate yourself from your phone

Leave it in another room, in a box that automatically puts it in airplane mode, or, if you’re brave enough, at home completely.

6. Start an accountability group

Odds are there are other folds in your social circle that would love to digital detox as well. Have a no-phones dinner or hike with friends. You could even start a money pool for those who end up braking to keep things interesting

7. Invest in a cold school alarm clock

This automatically sets up to at least not wake up with your device.

8. Make tech-free plans

There are plenty of activities—a beach day, a bike ride, a nature walk—that don’t requite a phone, and are far more fun without them.

Bottom line: we might never agree on whether or not technology is the savior or doom of civilization, or whether the pre-tech 80s were in fact the better time to be alive. But we can all say that we are here, now, and there are ways to make the best out of life, no matter what era we’re in.

We can also all agree that nobody needs to go back to 80s hair bands, right?

80s tech, technology, 80s nostalgia, life before cell phones, life before the internet, big techNobody wants this. media3.giphy.com

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Sustainability

"There's no catch": Latina activists are giving away thousands of free clothes in LA

Radical Clothes Swap is "a bad-ass group of stylish WOC who’ve made clothing swaps cool."

Credit: Radical Clothes Swap

Radical Clothes Swaps are changing the way we think about fashion.

The clothing world has changed drastically over the past 100 years, as we've witnessed the rise of fast fashion, with companies like Shein, Zara, H&M, and Fashion Nova now dominating the marketplace. As a result, it is estimated that the average American tosses 81.5 pounds of clothes away each year, contributing to the growing global textile waste crisis. However, in Los Angeles, a bad-ass team of Latina activists are putting their community activist roots to good use, combating fast fashion’s pro-waste ethos with a simple mission: free clothes for all.

Founded in 2021, Radical Clothes Swap (RCS) goes beyond thrift stores or apps like Depop, where users can sell second-hand clothing. It’s a revolutionary movement that asks us to challenge our assumptions about waste, consumption, and community care—and makes sure we look good while doing it. “In a capitalistic world, what’s the most radical thing you can do? Give resources away for free while helping the environment? Say no more,” declares Nicole Macias, co-founder and CEO of Radical Clothes Swap.


clothing swap, sign, free, donations, recyclingThe monthly events are refreshingly straightforward and have a huge impact on the community.Credit: Radical Clothes Swap

Radical Clothes Swap is a woman of color-owned, donation-based clothing swap that hosts monthly events throughout Los Angeles. It’s a refreshingly straightforward concept: people can donate up to 10 gently used items of clothing (with the exception of shoes and bags) and anyone, whether they’ve donated or not, can take home as many pieces of clothing as they want. See a shirt that your partner would look great in? Grab it, no questions asked. These clothes are for all, no exceptions.

“What we’ve created is beautiful because when it comes to Black and Brown folks, we’re not used to being given anything for free. People will often give us confused looks when we tell them the clothes are free. They expect there to be a catch, but there is no catch at all.” - Janninne Mancilla to Refinery29


Nicole Macias, a community organizer based in Northeast LA, met her RCS co-founder, Janninne Mancilla (the company’s social media and Marketing Manager) on Instagram, where the two connected over a “shared love of fashion and community” and decided to join forces. The rest of the team formed naturally, with Enri Navarro (RCS' Graphic Designer and Swap Manager) and Nikki Hernandez (Website Manager and Consultant), who were both already community advocates and friends of the co-founders.


@radicalclothesswap Our free monthly Sip & Swap is back at Angel City Brewery! Grab a miche and get your swap on 💞 every second Saturday of the month. #sustainablehotgirlsummer #radicalclothesswap #raddiebaddies #freeclothesforall #LosAngelesClothesSwap #angelcitybrewery #ilovemicheladas ♬ La Quebradora - Banda El Recodo

“We’re a bad-ass group of stylish WOC who’ve made clothing swaps cool,” reads the description on Radical Clothes Swap’s website. “Passionate about making the world a better (and less trashy place), each of us devotes our time and energy for free to this radical sustainable fashion cause, often storing the donated clothes and clothing swap equipment in our homes and car trunks.”

Recycling clothes is a radical act

The fashion industry is notorious for its encouragement of overconsumption, and is one of the world’s largest polluters, contributing 92 million tons of textile waste annually. Let’s visualize that: 92 million tons, or 184 billion pounds of waste. To get rid of that many clothes, the BBC estimates that a full dump truck would have to be emptied into a landfill every second for an entire year. Why so much waste? It’s reported that the average garment is only worn between seven to ten times before it’s thrown away. No, not given away, or sold, or donated. Thrown away.


Earth.org provides further disturbing facts. If no action is taken in the next fifteen years, the apparel industry’s global emissions will increase by 50% by 2030. The fashion industry is also responsible for 20% of global water waste, thanks to dyeing, finishing, and the production of materials like yarn and fiber. Ten percent of the ocean’s microplastic pollution comes from textiles, thanks to cheap materials like nylon and polyester, which shed microfilaments every time they’re washed and dried—then flow directly into the sewers. And if you’ve ever seen Finding Nemo, you know where that leads: our beloved oceans.

Oh, and did you know that returned clothes aren’t commonly resold? Two point six million tons of returned clothes end up in landfills—and that’s just in the United States. Just the act of returning clothes leaves an immense carbon footprint: in 2020, it was estimated that 16 million tons of CO2 emissions were released into the atmosphere because of online returns in America, which is the equivalent of 3.5 million cars driving non-stop for an entire year.

clothes, rack, reused, recycle, sustainabilityA patron browsing the selection at a Radical Clothes Swap event.Credit: Radical Clothes Swap

Well, that was a bummer, wasn’t it? Now, for the good news: it doesn’t have to be this way. Radical Clothes Swap has already made major strides towards a more sustainable future. One fashionista’s trash is another one’s treasure, and at RCS events, old garments lovingly gain new owners, extending their lifecycle by untold numbers of years.

“Our entire ethos is all about community and resource sharing,” shared Macias with VoyageLA in 2024. “We’re trying to decrease consumption and play with what you can do with what you have.”

Ready to radicalize your local clothing community? Luckily, the Radical Clothes Swap team has created a simple step-by-step template.


  1. Start a pile. Go through your closet and select three to five clothing items that have, in your heart, lost their luster. Whether it’s too big, too small, or fits just right but is in a pattern you find abhorrent these days, take this as a sign it’s time to move on. As a courtesy, make sure that each piece of clothing is actually gently used, not torn to shreds (Radical Clothes Swaps are not for worn-down hand-me-downs. If your item is unwearable, consider using a verified recycling outlet, like For Days). On clothing swap day, garments should be in good condition (ex. washed, neatly folded, lint-rolled, etc.)
  2. Round up your friends. Plan a date and start inviting! Be mindful and try your best to curate an inclusive swap, where all sizes, body types, and genders feel welcomed and are represented.
  3. Swap! This is the fun part. Make sure the environment is clean and ready to go beforehand, then it’s game time, baby. Blast your favorite tunes or consider serving a few snacks or drinks for an elevated vibe.
  4. Rinse and repeat. Then, it’s time to do it all over again.

“Sustainable fashion is not a one and done thing. Consistently buying second-hand and swapping your clothes for free can reduce the amount of clothing that ends up in landfills every year,” RCS reminds. “You can do your part (and save money) by hosting clothing swaps in your community. Love your clothes; love the planet!”

NOTE: Radical Clothes Shop is donations-based. To support their mission, consider donating on Venmo (@radicalclothesshop) or gift them a WordPress subscription.



Brought to you by Radical Clothes Swap's Venmo
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