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The four magic phrases to use when you’re stopped by the cops

Everyone should know their rights.

via Flex Your Rights/YouTube

How to speak to a police officer.

Whether it's a traffic stop that turns into "We smell something in your car" or a "driving while black" situation, you have rights when you're pulled over, and it's for the best if you actually use them.

So how does this work, anyway?

Well, you have rights when you're pulled over. These have been established via case law, and ultimately, some stem from the Constitution itself. In order, here are the magic phrases, along with some graphics to help you remember.

1. "Am I free to go?”

In any situation involving the police, you can ask this question. Some people ask it slightly differently: "Am I being detained?"—which is a version of the same question. Basically, if they've got nothing on you, they have to let you go. If they answer no to that question, you are in fact not free to go. In that case, you are suspected of doing something, and it's their job to try to get you to admit to it or to say a bit too much and incriminate yourself.

2. "I do not consent to any searches.”

One of the trickiest things that some law enforcement folks try is to talk you into letting them search your vehicle—or house, for that matter. "So if you haven't done anything, then you're ok with us searching your car … right? I mean, if you're innocent. We'll go easier on you if you let us." Do NOT give up your rights that easily. Are you certain your buddy didn't leave a bag of weed in the glove box? Are you sure your boyfriend took his target pistol out of the trunk after he went to practice shooting the other day? Are you absolutely certain that the body in your trunk was removed and buried in that farm fiel … whoops. Did I say that last one out loud?! The point is, don't give up your rights easily. And believe me, cops are gooooood at trying to play psychological games. Which leads to #3.

3. "I want to remain silent.”

You have that right, and if things start getting thick, you need to use it. "We clocked you going 60 in a 50, but when you opened your window to give us your license, we smelled marijuana." The correct answer to something like this is, "I want to remain silent." The temptation is to say, "Yeah, my buddy and I smoked in my car this morning but I wasn't driving, blah blah blah"—but then you're already nailed. Time for them to get the dogs and search. Congratulations, you're on your way to the pokey for the night.

4. "I want a lawyer.”

If you've reach this particular point, then you're in deep doodoo anyway, so go ahead and ask for one, and say nothing until he or she arrives. Remember these four things. It will be hard in the moment, with your adrenaline pumping, your freedom in question, and when you're possibly in physical danger, depending on the cops involved and your skin color.

"Am I free to go?"

"I do not consent to any searches."

"I want to remain silent."

"I want a lawyer."

Perhaps a word involving the first letter of the four statements will help you remember: FoSSiL (Free, Searches, Silent, Lawyer)

Or maybe a mnemonic:

— Fiscal Suns Scramble Lives

— Fresh Sushi Smell Lemons

— Flexible Straws Sell Lobsters

— Free Subjects Steam Lobsters

The clip below is a shortened version of a much longer one that explains your rights, detailing what you can and cannot do in these situations.

This article was written by Brandon Weber and originally appeared on 09.12.17


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Joy

Police called for someone trapped in the trunk of a car. It's an embarrassing misunderstanding.

"So there's, like, hair hanging out of your trunk…"

Toria Townsend|TikTok

Police called for someone trapped in trunk.

Sometimes things happen that are just plain embarrassing, where you know three years down the road you're likely going to wake up in a cold sweat remembering the thing that you hope everyone else has forgotten. But with the power of the internet, those hilariously humiliating moments can be cemented into internet history.

And if you're really unlucky, your embarrassment can become a meme. One that haunts you every few months for the rest of your life—unless you're the one that posts the video, then it's safe to assume you're perfectly fine with the entire world having a belly laugh at your expense. At least that's the logic that makes the most sense in this instance.

Toria Townsend uploaded a video to her TikTok page @classy_Melita, which has since taken over the app thanks to her side-splitting misfortune that involves the police, concerned citizens and a hair appointment.

Townsend had just gotten her hair done and returned home when she heard a knock on the door. The video looks to be recorded by a home surveillance system from the doorway and shows the woman answering the door as two police officers stand on the porch. By one officer's question, it seems obvious that he wasn't concerned that there could be a person trapped in the trunk of her car.

"The craziest thing you're not going to believe," the officer says. "So we got a call, somebody was concerned. Are you like a hairstylist?"

Likely to the officer's brief dismay, Townsend says she's not a hairstylist, which is the moment he informs her that there's hair sticking out of her car.

"Oh, my Jesus," Townsend screeches while trying to get out the door.

It wasn't a person at all. As she runs towards the car, the officers chuckle while she screams that it's her wig hanging from the trunk and giving passersby heart palpitations. The hilarious video has racked up a massive number of views as people continue to reshare it, including It's Gone Viral, where it has nearly 9 million likes and over 58 million views.

Watch the unforgettable interaction below:

@classy_melita

#rvp #wig #hilarous #icantmakethisup #police #policeoftiktok #embarrassing #blowthisup Police receive a call called that there was a body in my trunk.

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Democracy

Afroman made a brilliant music video from clips of Ohio police's misguided raid of his home

This might be the greatest musical comeback ever.

via Wikimedia Commons

Afroman ready for the 2024 United States Presidential Election

Joseph Foreman, better known to music fans as rapper Afroman, had his Ohio home raided by Adams County Sheriff's deputies last August. The deputies were acting on a warrant claiming probable cause that drugs, drug paraphernalia, and evidence of drug trafficking and kidnapping would be found on his property.

Afroman wasn't home at the time of the raid, but his wife captured footage of it on her phone.

The deputies found nothing, confiscated over $5,000 worth of Afroman’s hard-earned money, bashed in his front door, broke his front gate and destroyed his home security camera system. No charges were filed after the raid. The money was later returned to the "Because I Got High" rapper.

“They come up here with AR-15, traumatize my kids, destroyed my property, kick in my door, rip up and destroy my camera system,” he said in August, according to Fox 19.

Afroman got hilarious revenge on the sheriff's deputies by turning the security camera footage into music videos for two new songs, “Will You Help Me Repair My Door” and “Lemon Pound Cake.” The videos have nearly 4 million views on YouTube combined.

“Will You Help Me Repair My Door” tells the story of the raid using security footage.

“Lemon Pound Cake” is a song about the officer who eyed the delicious confection in Afroman’s kitchen with his pistol drawn.

Afroman also created merchandise featuring images of the deputies involved in the raid.

The deputies have now filed a lawsuit against Afroman, claiming that he used their personas for commercial purposes without permission. The deputies claim the attention caused them to suffer "embarrassment, ridicule, emotional distress, humiliation, and loss of reputation."

The complaint adds that Afroman “created dozens of videos and images of Plaintiffs’ personas and posted them on various social media platforms including Facebook, YouTube, Snap Chat, TikTok and Instagram.”

The deputies believe they are entitled to all the profits from using their personas, including concert ticket sales, music videos, and all products associated with the Afroman brand, including beer, marijuana and clothing.

So Afroman got his house trashed, his kids traumatized, and his money taken, and now the officers involved want to sue him for appearing in the video recorded on his property? The rapper believes that the deputies' activities were criminal.

“The warrant put the Adams county sheriff in a position to attempt to kill me,” he wrote on Instagram. “After the Adams County Sheriff. Burglarized vandalized and destroyed my property. They became thieves and stole my money. After they stole my money they became criminals. After they became criminals they lost their right of privacy. My house is my property, my video camera films, everything on my property as they begin, stealing my money, disconnecting plus destroying my video camera system, they became my property!”

Afroman’s attorney has released a statement claiming he will countersue.

The attorney statement shared by Afroman shared on Instagram says that they are waiting on public records requests from Adams County. “We are planning to counter-sue for the unlawful raid, money being stolen, and for the undeniable damage this had on my client's family, career and property," it adds.

Afroman is right to feel that he’s the victim in this story. He was wrongly accused of multiple crimes and took retribution by making a video of the raid, which was conducted by public officials. In Ohio, it is legal to film police interactions, and it’s an important right that holds law enforcement accountable.

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Joy

Touching video shows a deputy sheriff teaching a stalled teen how to drive a stick shift

“I asked her if I could help assist her. So I kinda went through the steps of helping her out.”

via Cleveland County Sheriff's Office

Deputy Kendrae Traylor helps a stalled motorist.

Just like rotary phones, shopping malls and popcorn you heat on the stove, stick shifts (or manual transmissions as the pros call ’em) may soon be a thing of the past. A report in The Atlantic shows that in the year 2000, manual transmissions accounted for 15% of the new and used cars sold by Carmax.

In 2020, that figure dropped to just 2.4%.

The sad thing is that countless people will never experience the pleasure of driving a manual transmission. There’s something to be said about the feeling of actually driving and controlling a vehicle with a stick shift. It's a sensation you can’t get behind the wheel of an automatic.

Manual cars are also cheaper, less likely to be stolen and have lower maintenance costs.

Given the manual transmission’s decline in popularity, seeing a teen learning how to drive one warms the heart. That may be why Cleveland County Deputy Kendrae Traylor of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, went out of his way to help a stalled teen learn how to drive her manual transmission.

Traylor and his partner, Ryan Graham, came across the stalled car in the middle of the road recently and pulled up to investigate.

"We came across a stranded vehicle, wondered what was going on with it. Made contact with this young female, brand new driver of a standard, didn't know what she was doing,” Traylor said in a post shared by Cleveland County Sheriff’s Office. “I asked her if I could help assist her. So I kinda went through the steps of helping her out.”

Traylor helped the girl pull the car into an empty parking lot where he taught her how to drive her stick shift with confidence.

“Once we were in an empty parking lot, I helped her step-by-step understand how to drive a manual transmission,” he continued.

"You want me to talk you through it? I can do that," Traylor can be heard saying in his partner's bodycam. The footage was later shared by the Sheriff’s Department where Traylor got a lot of love for being such a wonderful public servant.

"I love it. He was so patient and now she will be," Jennifer Rachel Trum commented on a TikTok post of the footage. "I know Kendrae through some friends, he’s such an amazing guy and an outstanding Deputy," brianramos0315 added.

"She will never forget your calm and caring lesson! Thank you for protecting and serving!" Stephanie Anne Morros said.

This story was especially touching for me because when I was 18 years old, I got my first car, a 1989 Toyota Tercel that had a manual transmission. My dad gave me an hour-long lesson on how to drive the car and then told me to take it home, alone. It was normally a 20-minute drive, but it took me more than an hour because I kept stalling in the middle of traffic.

The drive home was one of the scariest experiences of my life. I couldn’t get the car going at a traffic light and all the cars behind me were beeping as the light switched from green back to red.

I would have loved to have been helped by a kind deputy like Traylor during my fateful first trip alone in a manual transmission. Good news is, I made it home alive and I love driving a manual transmission so much that my next three cars were all sticks.

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