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Parents admit the biggest lie they've ever told their kids. And they're deviously brilliant.

"You don’t grow if you sleep in your parents bed."

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Parents are sharing the helpful little lies they're 'taking to the grave.'

Matt Leinart seems to have some time on his hands. A former standout quarterback at USC where he competed for a National Championship, Leinart spent seven seasons in the NFL before retiring from football. These days, he works college football games in-studio as an analyst for FOX Sports. It's a demanding job, but certainly less grueling than the rigors of being a professional athlete.

Lately, he's been leaning into his new role as a dad of three boys. "Just a Dad with a Heisman," his TikTok profile says. On his social media, you won't find a whole lot of football talk or glory days highlights. Instead, he prefers to share funny skits and musings on being a dad.

Leinart recently took to TikTok with a simple prompt: "Tell me the biggest lies you tell your kids."

"I'm not talking about Santa or the Easter Bunny," he captions the video. "I want the ones you're taking to the grave. (Don't worry I'm the only one reading the comments)"

The video quickly picked up steam on social media, racking up over 600 thousand views, and parents began chiming in. The responses did not disappoint.

@mattleinartqb

Spill… #imbored #parenting #secrets #parentsoftiktok #lies

Here are some of the best replies and, I've got to be honest, they're way more creative and devious than I ever would have expected.

1. "When new teeth grow in, I told her that they create new tastes. Now she tries to figure out which new foods she will like every time a new tooth comes in."

2. "Every single car accident we passed was bc the kids were fighting in the back seat"

3. "When their tablets need updating I have to mail it directly to Amazon and we have no clue how long it will take days, weeks or months. In reality they are in my closet and I just want them outside catching toads and bugs."

4. "I told my daughter that whenever a kid lies to their parents they eyes glow… now if she’s lying she squints at me!"

5. "All the candy at the front at checkouts is expired. That’s why it’s up front"

I always thought it was cruel that in order to leave any store, you have to walk through a gauntlet of candies and mini-toys. I can see this little lie coming in serious handy.

dads, parenting, parenthood, fatherhood, kids, funny, lies, lying, humor, teens, family, moms, motherhoodThe gauntlet parents must face before they can exit any store.Giphy

6. "They think the car doesn’t start unless their seatbelt is fastened. Facts."

7. "Our sons didn't eat cooked onions ( in casserole, etc l.). 'It's not onion. It's Japanese Clearfruit.' They cleaned their plates."

A quick Google search for Japanese Clearfruit does not yield any interesting results. Pretty clever that this parent came up with that on the fly!

8. "You don’t grow if you sleep in your parents bed."

As a dad to a 4-year-old that loves to come to bed in the middle of the night, I may steal this one.

9. "For every bite of vegetables at dinner, they could stay up 5 minutes later. But, they didn’t know how to tell time."

10. "You can only go to Chuck E Cheese if you’re invited for a party. We don’t know anyone that has had a party so…"


dads, parenting, parenthood, fatherhood, kids, funny, lies, lying, humor, teens, family, moms, motherhoodYou have to be "invited" to Chuck E. Cheese. You can't just show up.Giphy

11. "We told our daughter she couldn’t go to Disney World unless she learned how to go potty in the toilet. We told her Mickey doesn’t allow diapers."

12. "When the ice cream truck plays music, it means they’re empty."

This one came up again and again in the responses to Leinart's post. It must have been one the Gen X kids heard over and over when they were kids, to the point that it was almost mythical.


dads, parenting, parenthood, fatherhood, kids, funny, lies, lying, humor, teens, family, moms, motherhoodThe music on the ice cream truck means it's empty. Brilliant!Giphy

13. "We live on a lake and all our granddaughters know the lake doesn’t open until 9am. "

14. "That McDonalds has Sad Meals for naughty kids. My kids are still SILENT in the drive thru"

15. "I used to tell my kids the cops would pull us over if the interior light was on at night"

That dang interior light!

They're not all mean or meant to work in the parents' favor! Some lies and bits of deception help keep the magic of childhood alive.

16. "My son lost his tooth on the playground. I took one of my daughters [old ones] and we all pretended to search and magically found his tooth... in the snow"

17. "That if we saw the moon - it would follow us home to make sure we made it safely. My daughter believed this until like middle school and still talks about it"

18. "My younger brother thought that North Carolina was the windshield capitol of the world until he was in college because one time we were driving through the state during a really bad storm and he was a super nervous kid so my dad had to reassure him that we were safe because we were in the windshield capitol of the world."

The windshield capitol of the world! Now that's truly inspired, and all in the name of comforting a scared child.

19. "Dead squirrels in the road are just squirrels taking a nap."

The entire thread begs the question: Is it really OK to lie to your kids?

The answer is: it depends. Everyone is going to have their own idea of what's right and wrong.

“Usually, we are lying to our children out of kindness to them, because we don’t want them to be upset or have to deal with the awfulness of the world,” author Judi Ketteler told CNN. These are called prosocial lies, because they're meant to benefit the recipient. Lying to prevent your kids from finding out the truth about Santa Claus, or to shield them from a harsh realization about death—these are prosocial lies that are generally considered to be OK.

Ketteler adds that "lies of omission" are even more common and necessary when raising kids. It's when you tell them the truth, but leave out crucial information that may be painful for them or hard to process.

And finally, there are the selfish lies. The lies that give parents a much-needed break or help us avoid a meltdown or major confrontation we're not in the mood to have. The common ice cream truck lie, for example, can help us avoid a major standoff and the tears and screaming that will probably come along with it. At least, in the short term. Experts agree that it's probably not the best idea, and it would be healthier and more productive to set firm boundaries and stand by them instead of lying. But...we're still going to do it sometimes because it's funny, makes for a good story, and because our kids will one day lie to their kids because they're too tired to go to Chuck E. Cheese just like we were.

It's the circle of life.

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Motherhood

Busy mom gets blindsided by an elderly man's off-the-cuff remark in the very best way

It wasn't what she expected him to say, and his positivity made all the difference.

Photo credit: Canva

Every mom needs some encouragement.

Parents of newborns know they are in the middle of a joyous and stressful era. But far too often, the people they run into choose to frame things negatively when talking to them about their young child. They’ll say things like, “Don’t worry, it gets better” or “Boy, do you have your hands full.”

That’s why Steph Morrison's video on TikTok touched so many hearts. It’s about the fantastic things that can happen when people choose to see things in a positive light instead of a negative one.

double stroller, mom, motherhood, toddlers, Moms of littles need positive encouragement.Photo credit: Canva

“The sweetest thing just happened,” Morrison begins in her video. “I was just finishing my walk and we were just pulling down our street and this old man, he stopped so we could walk by because we’ve got the double-wide stroller that takes up the whole space, and he goes ‘Wow! You’re going to have a lot of fun.’"

The comment blindsided Morrison because it reframed how she looks at being a parent.

@_stephmorrison_

I never would have guessed what the man would say nor did I ever predict tears would roll down my face like they did. Thankful for this sweet glimmer from God 🫶🏼✨ #momspiration #momsoftiktok #momsover30 #quotesforyou #momquotes #postpartumjourney #postpartumlife #happywords #happinessbegins #creatorsearchinsights


“I don’t know why I’m getting emotional telling you now. But most people say, ‘You’ve got your hands full’ and it’s my biggest pet peeve, but he was so sweet and I could, like, see the memories flash through his eyeballs as he said that to me: ‘You’re going to have a lot of fun.’”

“Like, dang! That’s the type of vibe and energy I’m going to bring to motherhood,” she continued. “I was having a really great time with the kids already, so I don’t know why I’m crying while telling you this. But if you’re a mother out there, I hope you’re having a lot of fun, too, because why not?”

kid dancing, joy, funKids can be a lot of fun.Giphy GIF by Piñata Farms

Everyone knows that parenting can be hard. But it’s also filled with joy, laughter, hope, possibilities and new experiences. The elderly man’s comments were a great reminder to Morrison and her followers to focus on the joy and possibilities of being a parent instead of the challenges and hard work.

The video struck a chord with mothers in the comments who shared similar experiences.

“An older man in the grocery store stopped me when my son was 8 months old and said, ‘Young enough to still talk to the angels, put in a good word for me!’” Rachel wrote.

“My only son is 7 months old. I can’t have any more kids due to life-threatening complications at birth. The other day, a man said to me, ‘He gets to have you all to himself. Isn’t that so special?’” Happy_Gilmoree added.

mom carrying baby, mom in grocery store, motherhood, babiesMoms share stories of strangers sharing encouraging words in public.Photo credit: Canva

CaitlinPrice25 hit the nail on the head. “Society makes us feel like kids are a burden,” she wrote. “Just a little change of perspective can make all the difference.”

A positive mindset can make life much easier for parents, but it’s also great for their children. Children look to their parents and model their behavior; those with a positive attitude are likely to raise happy, optimistic children.

“A mother’s ability to model positivity becomes a powerful tool in shaping a child’s character, fostering qualities such as kindness, compassion, and a positive outlook on life,” The Motherhood Center in Houston, Texas, writes.

mom joy, happy mother, dancing motherModeling positivity is a gift to your children.Giphy GIF by Maddie And Tae

The story also reminds everyone, whether they are parents or not, of the importance of leading with positivity when dealing with others. The man could have said something cliché such as “I hope you’re getting enough sleep,” but instead, he reminded Morrison of the joy of parenting, and she made his remark her north star. That’s the power of positivity.

This article originally appeared last year.

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Parenting

Parents are sick and tired of explaining why they 'never want to bring the kids over' to visit

Our kids are probably going to hurt your house and themselves.

Johnny Cohen/Unsplash
Fed up parents explain why they 'never want to bring the kids over' to visit

It's a good news/bad news situation for parents of young kids. The good news? Everyone wants to spend time with the kids! Grandparents, aunts and uncles, friends. They all want a relationship and lots of special moments with the little ones. It's why people assume if you have family nearby that you're "so lucky," and that you're overrun with free babysitting offers. Ha! If only.

The bad news comes down to one phrase: "When are you bringing them over?" Parents have been frustrated by the expectations of orchestrating stressful visits for generations — loading the kids in a car or on an airplane only to spend hours chasing them around in an un-baby-proofed environment and watching routines go to hell.

Now they're sounding off on social media and airing their grievances.

Why visiting grandparents and other relatives is so challenging for parents

A mom recently took to Reddit to vent about everyone in her life wanting her to "bring the kids to them."

"My parents live 30 mins away and always bug me about not coming to visit them," she writes. They constantly ask, "Why don't you bring our granddaughter to come see us?"

The post struck a nerve with parents, who chimed in with hundreds of passionate comments. The fascinating discussion highlights a few things that make arranging visits with young kids a potential nightmare for parents.

Grandparents' houses are rarely childproofed

Grandparents love their breakable decor! Ceramic doo-dads, glass vases everywhere. They can't get enough. In fact, they like to dedicate massive pieces of furniture only to housing their fine china, which they never use, but which is also extremely valuable and sentimental.

And while they should be able to decorate their house however they see fit (they've earned the right!) that doesn't make it a good environment for toddlers and babies.


parents, parenting, moms, dads, grandparents, millennial grandparents, gen x, boomers, grandparent conflict, grandma, grandpaThe breakable decor found in every grandparents' house ozalee.fr/Flickr

"Last week was the last straw, I took my daughter to my parents and of course she went EVERYWHERE! flooded their toilet, broke a vase, and tried multiple times to climb their furniture," the Reddit mom writes.

Parents in a foreign environment are on constant safety duty and can rarely sit down

Let's be honest. Sometimes these "visits" are hardly worth the effort. After all, it's hard to get much catch up time when you're dutifully chasing your kid around.

"They don’t understand that my 3 yo ... is absolutely wild," writes another user in the thread. "She has no self preservation and nothing we do works. She doesn’t listen, she throws, she bites, she refuses to use the potty. It’s exhausting and then ... they expect us to entertain them, when I’m trying to just keep my kid from jumping off the stairs and into an ER visit."

A visit at the grandparents' house is often not a fun catch-up time for mom and dad. It's rare to get to sit down and have an adult conversation when they're busy trying to play Safety Police. It's common to leave one of these visits frustrating and like it wasn't really a visit at all.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Even just putting the kids in the car for a 20-minute drive is more work than it seems

Taking the kids out of the house requires packing a bag, bringing extra clothes, loading up on snacks, etc.

It seems easy to "pop over" but it actually absorbs the majority of the day between prep, visit, and aftermath. In the case of the OP mom and her parents that are "just" 30 minutes away, that's an entire hour of just driving, not counting any visiting time. If anyone's ever driven with young kids, you know that's an eternity! For a drive like that, you need snacks, you need entertainment. You may have to clean up spills, deal with traffic tantrums, or pull over to break up a fight. It's really a lot of work.

Naps and routines go to hell

Parents with babies and toddlers know all too well — there is a price to pay for taking the kids out of the house for too long.

Chances are, the baby won't nap in a strange environment and then you're stuck with a cranky kid the rest of the night. You can and will try, bringing your little pack-and-play and your best intentions, but the process will be draining and probably unsuccessful.

And then guess what? You're totally screwed when you go home later, yay!

Kids with special needs require even more consistency

Kids with autism or ADHD can really struggle outside of their zone of safety. They might become severely dysregulated, have meltdowns, or engage in dangerous behaviors. This adds even more stress to parents and makes the visits even less fun and satisfying in the end.

Explaining and mediating the generational divide

parents, parenting, moms, dads, grandparents, millennial grandparents, gen x, boomers, grandparent conflict, grandma, grandpaIt may be hard to navigate, but a positive child-grandparent relationship is such a powerful thing. Photo by Tim Kilby on Unsplash

Why is this a conflict almost all parents can relate to?

Is this a Boomer vs Millennials thing?

Some experts think that generational values and traditions might play a role.

"Many Boomers were accustomed to more traditional, hierarchical family dynamics, where visiting grandparents was a way for the younger generation to show respect," says Caitlin Slavens, a family psychologist.

But that's not to say this is a new problem. I can remember my own parents driving me and my brothers over an hour to visit my grandparents seemingly every other weekend, but very few occasions where they came to visit us. It must have driven my parents nuts back then!

Plus, it's easy to forget that it's hard for older people to travel, too. They may have their own issues and discomforts when it comes to being away from their home.

"But for today’s parents, balancing careers, kids’ routines, and the demands of modern parenting is a much bigger undertaking. Grandparents might not always see how childproofing their space or making the trip themselves could make a huge difference, especially considering how travel and disruption can impact younger kids' moods and routines," Slavens says.

"So yes, this divide often comes down to different expectations and life experiences, with older generations potentially not seeing the daily demands modern families face."

Is there any hope for parents and grandparents coming to a better understanding, or a compromise?

"First, open conversations help bridge the divide—explain how much of a difference it makes when the kids stay in a familiar space, especially when they’re very young," suggests Slavens.

"Share practical details about the challenges, like childproofing concerns or travel expenses, to help grandparents see it from a parent’s perspective. You might even work together to figure out solutions, like making adjustments to create a more child-friendly space in their home or agreeing on a shared travel plan."

Ultimately, it's a good thing when grandparents, friends, and other relatives want to see the kids. We all have the same goal. Just look at how incredible it can be when everything goes right:

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

"It’s helpful to approach the topic with empathy, focusing on everyone’s goal: more quality time together that’s enjoyable and low-stress for everyone involved. For parents, it’s about setting boundaries that work, and for grandparents, it’s about recognizing that flexibility can really show the parents that you are ... willing to make adjustments for their children and grandchildren."

Enjoyable, low-stress quality time — that's something everyone can get behind.

This article was originally posted last year. It has been updated.

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Health

Science confirms viral theory about inheriting your mom's nervous system—and it explains a lot

“My mom really said, ‘Double it and give it to the next person.’”

Photo credit: Canva

Mother struggling to comfort her child.

Think about the last time your mom—whom you love and cherish—handled a situation poorly. Maybe she lost her temper while waiting to "speak to a representative" on the phone, or raised her voice in a moment that didn't warrant it. To be clear, mothers are not the only ones who lose their cool (we'll save analyzing your other family members' questionable behaviors for another time). But since they contribute 50% of our DNA, their unique responses to stress—their triggers, defense mechanisms, and attempts at self-soothing—deserve a second look. Because, as hoards of people on TikTok are now discovering, we inherit far more than just eye color and a winning smile from our moms.

Thanks to a viral video posted by TikTok user @sierraalexndraa (also known as Sierra Saltz, a chronic illness advocate and content creator who uses her platform to explore the connections between health, energy, and intentional living), people are discovering the complex, surprising world of genetic inheritance. The post, which has garnered 15 million views and 2.4 million likes, has sparked intense discussions about passed-on family traits, inherited emotional regulation, and that maybe, we really have no choice but to turn into our mothers.


@sierralexandraa Did you know we inherit our mothers nervous system. #creatorsearchinsights #nervoussystemregulation #neuroception #epigenetics #neurospicy #fyp ♬ original sound - sierra

"Did you know that you didn't just inherit your mom's genes, you inherited her nervous system, too?" Sierra asks. "From the moment we're in the womb, we're absorbing our mother's emotional state, her stress levels, and even the way she regulates her own nervous system."

The news shocked the Internet, with comments ranging from vulnerable ("You forgot to hold my hand 🥺," wrote one person) to outright denial ("Great, thank you, wish it didn't, moving on," replied another).

But the most common response? "Well, this explains a lot…"


via GIPHY

But is Sierra’s claim really true? Do we really inherit our mother’s nervous system? There was only one way to find out: We turned to science to try to explain this phenomenon. Here’s what we found.


The science behind “inheriting your mother’s nervous system”

Mitochondria tells the story. Yes, you inherit your mom’s nervous system—and your dad’s, too, don't forget. “It’s one of the basic tenets of biology: We get our DNA from our mom and our dad,” explains medical science writer Lisa Marshall. “But one notable exception has perplexed scientists for decades.”

It’s the mitochondria, the famed “powerhouse of the cell.”


mothers, science, mitochondria, genetics, nervous systemThe mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell. Photo credit: Canva

Humans, along with most animals, only inherit mitochondrial DNA from their mothers—the result of a strange anomaly in the procreation cycle, as “all traces” of the male mitochondrial genome are obliterated the moment the sperm meets egg.

Why is this important? Well, it turns out that mitochondria are involved in almost every aspect of the human body. “The nervous system cannot possibly function without the mitochondria,” explain Dutch psychological scientist Peter Kramer and research scientist Paola Bressan in the research article titled “Our (Mother’s) Mitochondria and Our Mind.”

Besides providing our bodies with energy, these specialized powerhouses also regulate calcium in neurons, ensures synapse formation and the creation of new neurons, and maintains the delicate balance between cell survival and programmed cell death (apoptosis). Which might sound like a bunch of A.P. Biology buzzwords shoved together, for those not in the medical field.

But just imagine the humble mitochondria, working overtime to make sure everything’s in order: that our senses work, our motive skills are up-to-code, memories are created, and hormones are properly released. Unbeknownst to most, the mitochondria in our bodies are taking care of us. Almost like… a mom.


via GIPHY

But when things go haywire, a bunch of problems tend to follow. “A place where mitochondrial trouble occurs frequently is the brain,” writes Kramer and Bressan. So, “it is hardly accidental that their malfunctioning has been associated with virtually every mental or neurological affliction on earth, including chronic psychological stress and fatigue, cognitive deficits, Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s disease, anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, autism, multiple sclerosis, and Down syndrome.”

It’s not just genetics. Beyond the cellular level, a child’s ability to tolerate stress and self-soothe begins in the womb. Research suggests that chronic maternal stress experienced during pregnancy isn't just felt by the mom, but her baby as well—potentially wreaking havoc on the child’s stress-response systems before they're even born, which could lead to future psychological complexes around relaxation and emotional equilibrium.

There’s a unique mother-daughter connection, too. A groundbreaking UC San Francisco study found that the corticolimbic system—a fancy term for the part of the brain that’s in charge of emotional regulation and is often linked with mood disorders—is “more likely to be passed down from mothers to daughters” than to sons.


There’s no need to panic

While there's a clear connection between your nervous system and your mom's, it's important to understand that this isn't the complete story. As Dr. Fumiko Hoeft, a UCSF associate professor of psychiatry who led that groundbreaking study, stresses, "The finding does not mean that mothers are necessarily responsible for their daughters' depression. Many factors play a role in depression—genes that are not inherited from the mother, social environment and life experiences, to name only three. Mother-daughter transmission is just one piece of it."


mothers, science, mitochondria, genetics, nervous systemA pregnant mother taking a deep breath.Photo credit: Canva

Also, give your mom some credit! “We are more likely to inherit the good and the bad parts of our mother’s nervous system,” Dr. Natalie Jones, a licensed psychotherapist, says. “If your mother is calm, nurturing, and manages stress well, chances are you are likely to manage things in a similar fashion.”


Inheritance does not equal destiny

The mitochondria given to you at birth are just that—nothing more. Even nervous systems can be rewired (once you're out of the womb, that is). Through engaging in neuroplasticity-boosting activities daily, like physical exercise, learning new skills (hello, Duolingo), and mind-body techniques like yoga and meditation that lower stress hormones, your nervous system can be profoundly reshaped. Your mitochondria will thank you.

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