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Dad found out his son bullied a kid at school and came up with a brilliant teaching moment

"I told him that we have the opportunity to make things right."

@thehalfdeaddad/TikTok

Dad on TikTok shared how he addressed his son's bullying.

What do you do when you find out your kid bullied someone? For many parents, the first step is forcing an apology. While this response is of course warranted, is it really effective? Some might argue that there are more constructive ways of handling the situation that teach a kid not only what they did wrong, but how to make things right again.

Single dad Patrick Forseth recently shared how he made a truly teachable moment out of his son, Lincoln, getting into trouble for bullying. Rather than forcing an apology, Forseth made sure his son was actively part of a solution.


The thought process behind his decision, which he explained in a now-viral TikTok video, is both simple and somewhat racial compared to how many parents have been encouraged to handle similar situations.

“I got an email a few days ago from my 9-year-old son's teacher that he had done a ‘prank’ to a fellow classmate and it ended up embarrassing the classmate and hurt his feelings,” the video begins.

At this point, Forseth doesn’t split hairs. “I don't care who you are, that's bullying,” he said. “If you do something to somebody that you know has the potential end result of them being embarrassed in front of a class or hurt—you’re bullying.”

So, Forseth and Lincoln sat down for a long talk (a talk, not a lecture) about appropriate punishment and how it would have felt to be on the receiving end of such a prank.

From there, Forseth told his son that he would decide how to make things right, making it a masterclass in taking true accountability.

“I demanded nothing out of him. I demanded no apology, I demanded no apology to the teacher,” he continued, adding, “I told him that we have the opportunity to go back and make things right. We can't take things back, but we can try to correct things and look for forgiveness.”

@thehalfdeaddad Replying to @sunshinyday1227 And then it’s my kid 🤦‍♂️😡 #endbullyingnow #talktoyourkidsmore #dadlifebestlife #singledadsover40 #teachyourchildren #ReadySetLift ♬ Get You The Moon - Kina

So what did Lincoln do? He went back to his school and actually talked to the other boy he pranked. After learning that they shared a love of Pokémon, he then went home to retrieve two of his favorite Pokémon cards as a peace offering, complete with a freshly cleaned case.

Lincoln would end up sharing with his dad that the other boy was so moved by the gesture that he would end up hugging him.

“I just want to encourage all parents to talk to your kids,” Forseth concluded. “Let's try to avoid just the swat on the butt [and] send them to their room. Doesn't teach them anything.”

In Forseth’s opinion, kids get far more insight by figuring out how to resolve a problem themselves. “That's what they're actually going to face in the real world once they move out of our nests.”

He certainly has a point. A slap on the wrist followed by being marched down somewhere to say, “I’m sorry,” only further humiliates kids most of the time. With this gentler approach, kids are taught the intrinsic value of making amends after wrongdoing, not to mention the power of their own autonomy. Imagine that—blips in judgment can end up being major character-building moments.

Kudos to this dad and his very smart parenting strategy.


This article originally appeared on 3.24.23

From Your Site Articles
fatherhood
Pop Culture

Jimmy Fallon asked people to share 'funny, weird, or embarrassing' stories about their dads

When life is one big dad joke.

YouTube

Dad knows lots of things … just not who this Taylor Swift guy is.

There are many traditional staples of fatherhood—love, support, protection, security, providing an example—but there is, of course, that other not-so-warm-and-fuzzy feeling that dads can provoke in their kids at any given moment … sheer, utter embarrassment.

Usually in a father’s humiliation tool belt is the infamous dad joke. These corny puns have been around since 2003, and let’s face it, they’ll never leave. Of course, no dad needs one to make your eyes roll. They can do that most of the time simply by being themselves.

For his well-known #Hashtags segment, Jimmy Fallon asked his “Tonight Show” audience to share “funny, weird, or embarrassing” stories about their dads. Fallon, a father himself, is no stranger to the cringeworthy power of a dad joke. In a 2020 interview with TODAY, Fallon admitted, “I’m starting to get the eye rolls now where Daddy’s not the funniest person in the world.”


Don’t worry Fallon! Clearly you’re not alone, because people replied with some truly hilarious comments. Dads might be silly, but we’ll gladly put up with it for the love they give us.


Enjoy 20 of the very best #DadStories. As usual, Fallon went first:

1.


"Instead of buying a smoker my dad just grills in the garage with the door closed." – @jimmyfallon

2.

"At my aunt’s wedding reception, my dad ran out from the bathroom when he heard You Should Be Dancing by the Bee Gees play, and proceeded to do John Travolta’s routine from Saturday Night Fever." – @MJ_Rose88

tonight show hashtags

Kudos to the dads with these sick moves.

Giphy

3.

"My Dad will call me sometimes when he wants me to bring him food. He refers to me as 'GrubDash.'" – @FalPalAMF828

4.

"My dad likes to play a very morbid game called 'guess who died', which consists of him gossiping about someone I probably haven't seen in 20+ years and can't remember at all, who died recently. Bonus points for guessing the cause of death." – @jon_jonz

5.

"My dad used to drink his morning coffee with his dentures in his hand while reading the newspaper. When we asked him why, he said his teeth also wanted to read the newspaper." – @FallonHolic_

6.

"When my dad took my sister to her first Jr. HS dance, she asked to be dropped off a block before the school. My dad proceeded to take her all the way up to the main entrance, got out of the car and loudly announced her arrival!" – @77BroncosFan

7.

"Asked my dad if he knew who Taylor Swift was...he said, I don't care who he is!" – @JessyKrupa

jimmy fallon dad stories

That's Mr. Swift to you.

Giphy

8.

"My dad whistles really loud. He sticks his head out the window and whistles back to birds. But when the lady next door heard him, she called 911. The cops told her, 'Lady, he didn’t whistle at you. He only flirts with birds.'" – @tostianascripts

9.

"When my dad would leave a message on my answering machine, he would end the message saying, 'This is dad signing off.'" – @RealRobFindor

10.

"We were on vacation and the gift shops selling fudge called plain fudge 'chocolate no nuts.' A guy walked up to my dad with some samples and offered him some saying 'chocolate no nuts?' And my dad said 'what did you just call me?'" – @lauraceciliaOT

11.

"My Dad laid a new floor in my brother's house. It was all finished so we couldn't understand why he was taking up the boards again. Turns out he had seen a spider run underneath and was worried it would be trapped." – @Sohnzie

12.

"Whenever my dad would try to talk us into trying something new to eat he'd state, 'It's so good it'll put hair on your chest.' He had 3 daughters." – @Bookelew

jimmy fallon twitter

OMG, DAD WHY?

Giphy

13.

"My mom once bought a 6 ft Santa statue at a yard sale without telling dad. When he got home and parked, we heard banging, crashing and swearing. We went to look and the Santa was laying face down on the curb. Dad thought someone was trying to jump him." – @dknessfalls

14.

"My dad couldn’t decide if he wanted to be called 'grandpa' or 'papa' so he just told all of us to call him 'Coach.' He’s not a coach." – @iPopEditor

15.

"My father went to the McDonalds drive thru and asked for a whopper. When they said 'they didn’t have whoppers', He just drove off without placing an order." – @Marisa_Rosie22

16.

"One day we went out to eat at Pizza Hut and sat in front of an empty table with some pizza left on it. My dad, being the penny pincher he is, grabbed some and started eating it. A few minutes later the couple comes back from the bathroom asking 'where’s our pizza?'" – @Alex_Erickson3

17.

"My dad let a bee land on his hand and watched it closely as it stung him because he 'wanted to see the process up close.'" – @TrippyPsycholo1

dad jokes

Up close? No thanks.

Giphy

18.

"My dad once tried to tell a lady she had a Big Bug on her, but accidentally told her she had a Really Big Butt. She was not amused." – @Sallyjo25

19.

"My dad thinks it's funny to introduce my mom as his 'first wife'....my parents have been married for 58 years and are in their late 80's." – @annMcD87

20.

"My dad entered Canada by swimming across the Niagara from the US under the cover of night." – @albertduic

jimmy fallon hashtags, fallon hashtags dad stories

Dads can be mischievous.

Giphy


This story originally appeared on 06.17.22

From Your Site Articles
fatherhood
Family

Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis admit they don't bathe themselves or their kids very often

An interesting approach to cleanliness...

via Wikimedia Commons

The water bill at the Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis residence appears to be pretty low after recent revelations the couple made about their family's bathing habits.

In a recent appearance on Dax Shepard's "Armchair Expert" podcast, they admitted they're not that into bathing themselves or their two children, Dimitri Portwood, 4, and Wyatt Isabelle, 6.

The conversation started when Shepard explained his ongoing disagreement with co-host Monica Padman. The two have dissenting views over whether people should use soap. "You should not be getting rid of all the natural oil on your skin with a bar of soap every day," he said. "It's insane."

Kunis agreed with Shepard and was very candid about her bathing ritual. "I don't wash my body with soap every day," she shared. "But I wash pits and tits and holes and soles."

"I can't believe I'm in the minority here of washing my whole body in the shower," Padman replied. "Who taught you to not wash?"

"I didn't have hot water growing up as a child," Kunis recalled, "so I didn't shower very much anyway." Kunis was born in the then-Soviet controlled Ukrainian city of Chernivtsi in 1983. Her family migrated to America when she was seven.

Kutcher added that he regularly uses soap and water on just his "armpits and crotch" and "nothing else."

Kunis has passed her lax attitude towards bathing on to her children.

"When I had children," she said, "I also didn't wash them every day. I wasn't the parent that bathed my newborns—ever." Shepard agreed, saying that he and wife Kristen Bell only bathe their children as part of a nighttime routine and don't pay much attention to their cleanliness.

"That's how we feel about our children. We're like, 'Oof, something smells,'" Kunis added. Kutcher has a simple rule when it comes to his children and their cleanliness. "Here's the thing — if you can see the dirt on 'em, clean 'em," he says. "Otherwise, there's no point."

While the Kutcher-Kunis clan's approach towards hygiene may not be typical of the average American family, they may not be wrong according to science. Research suggests that children benefit from being exposed to germs early in life.

"This line of thinking, called the 'hygiene hypothesis,' holds that when exposure to parasites, bacteria, and viruses is limited early in life, children face a greater chance of having allergies, asthma, and other autoimmune diseases during adulthood," WebMD says.

Basically, the more your body is exposed to the more it can fight off.

"Just as a baby's brain needs stimulation, input, and interaction to develop normally, the young immune system is strengthened by exposure to everyday germs so that it can learn, adapt, and regulate itself," notes Thom McDade, PhD, associate professor and director of the Laboratory for Human Biology Research at Northwestern University.

As for Kutcher and Kunis, they both share the same attitude when it comes to hygiene so nobody in the relationship has the right to complain if the other is a little funky. If it works for them, who are we to judge?


This article originally appeared on 7.28,.21

From Your Site Articles
parenting
Family

Husband leaves a sink full of dirty dishes. But one simple action changes its meaning.

Small gestures can speak volumes.

@susandoingsusanthings/TikTok

Though this image might infuriate you, know there's more to the story.

We’ve probably all (especially moms and wives) have had it up to here with stories of men not being able to really pull their weight in partnerships.

So when I present to you a story about a husband leaving behind a sink full of dirty dishes for his wife to find, you’d probably sooner roll your eyes and contemplate hopping over to Instagram instead than give this one a read.

But hold on just a second, because this story has a surprising hopeful twist.

In a now-viral TikTok post, a wife named Susan shows the mess she woke up to the morning after her husband had friends over to watch a game.

She was initially fuming as she approached the disarray. That is, until she saw the note her husband left behind, saying “I got it!”

For Susan, this changed everything. Her husband acknowledged his mess, communicated that awareness with his wife, and didn’t leave it assuming someone else would take care of it. Which, in turn, made her feel seen and looked out for.

“I just love that he acknowledges that [he] left a mess in the sink, and don't worry, he'll take responsibility for it, but anyways, we've come so far,” Susan says in the clip.

@susandoingsusanthings Leaving a simple note instantly made me not care about the dishes in the sink!! I love communication and we have come so far!! #susandoingsusanthings #marriedlife #marriage #marriagehumor #marriagegoals #marriagecomedy #marriagelife ♬ original sound - SusanDoingSusanThings

Many viewers agreed that this small shift made a world of difference.

“I love this. Like he was tired and didn’t want to do it but knows you shouldn’t have to. What ace communication and all it took was a post-it” one person wrote.

Another echoed, “It’s that easy!!! Like do I want to do the dishes after hosting? Heck no. Let me sleep and I’ll do it in the morning. But the note changes it ALL 🥰.”

On the other hand, many people were still left frustrated, arguing that expectations were still far too low if this simple gesture is receiving such applause.

One person even lamented, “That big sigh and you’ve come so far, I wonder how many fights it took 😫,” to which Susan replied, “We’ve been together for 20 years… Fight = growth.”

She also reiterated that the purpose of the post was to show in real-time how healthy, thoughtful communication between partners can help transform even the most menial task into a positive, even relationship-fortifying, experience.

And that is probably the biggest, most beneficial takeaway to lean into here. Ongoing communication difficulties is listed as the number one cause of divorce, even beating out infidelity. Yes, of course, moms are tired of being the default parents and wives are tired of pulling double duty, but if this story is any indicator, they are also yearning for their partners to meet them halfway on the communication front as well.

And as we can see, even the smallest gestures make big impacts.

In case anyone was wondering: Susan's husband did do the dishes the next day ❤️


This article originally appeared on 1.6.24

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