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How Father's Day began when a tireless young woman honored her Civil War veteran single dad

The last living descendent of Sonora Smart Dodd is finally sharing the incredible story.

Images via MyHeritage

Sonora Smart Dodd and a painting of her father, William Jackson Smart

Father's Day falls on Sunday, June 15 this year. The holiday will see families gathered together to honor and celebrate father figures in all forms, from grandfathers to stepdads and 'chosen' dads. And the origin of Father's Day has a deep connection to American history and single dads.

It's a story that begins in Spokane, Washington in 1909, with a young woman named Sonora Smart Dodd. It's an important tale in American history that was uncovered by the researcher Naama Lanski and her team at MyHeritage.com (an online genealogy platform)—who reached out to Sonora’s great-granddaughter and the last living direct heir, Betsy Roddy—as well as researched historical documents and records from the time period.

Dodd was listening to a church sermon on Mother's Day when it struck her: "Why isn’t there a Father’s Day?" Her father, a Civil War veteran named William Jackson Smart, deserved to be honored.

Sonora Smart Dodd, father's day, founder of father's day, father's day holiday, father's day storyPhoto of Sonora Smart Dodd.Courtesy of MyHeritage

Betsy Roddy tells Upworthy that after Sonora's mother's death in 1898 (when she was just 16), William Jackson Smart raised her and her five younger brothers on his own—something that bucked cultural tradition at the time.

"Rather than pass his children off to relatives, he chose to keep them at home and serve as mother and father for 6 young children," she says.

After Sonora approached her pastor about establishing a Father's Day, her vision came to fruition in 1910 when the inaugural Father's Day was held.

William Jackson Smart, civil war, civil war veteran, father's day, fathers dayDrawing of William Jackson Smart.Courtesy of MyHeritage

"It took a year, but she petitioned the ministerial alliance and YWCA in Spokane," Roddy tells Upworthy. "It was a simple celebration city-wide, and Father's Day was proclaimed by the local government. They handed out red and white roses—red to living fathers and white for fathers who had passed. It became official symbol of Father's Day."

The holiday quickly went nationwide, but it would be another 60+ years until it was recognized by the United States federal government. Dodd petitioned and lobbied for Father's Day to become a national holiday.

"She worked pretty tirelessly to push the concept forward," adds Roddy.

Finally, in 1972 under President Richard Nixon, the third Sunday in June was officially proclaimed Father's Day and signed into law. Dodd was 90 years old, alive and well and able to see her tireless work pay off.

Roddy was able to develop a relationship with her great-grandmother before she passed away at 96.

"My great-grandmothers stuck to the idea and vision of this being a national holiday. She fearlessly took on something much bigger than herself, before women had the right to vote," says Roddy. "It's easy to lose sight of that in context of today's world. She took on something women didn't do that was incredibly courageous. It's also a story of a woman's courage. To hold fast to an idea and see it through is a lesson for all of us. It's not just my great-grandma's legacy, it's an American story and legacy."

Adds Lanski, " At a time when parenthood was seen almost exclusively through a maternal lens, she championed the vital role of fathers and fatherhood - shaped by her own experience being raised by a dedicated and proud single father."

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A dad posted his 5-year-old's paintings online and couldn't believe the huge response

Kudos to this dad for helping to unlock his son's impressive talent.

Unsplash & bruncvik/reddit

Joseph, a dad from Dublin, Ireland says he started drawing and painting in the evenings about a year ago to help him unwind from work. It's a great idea, because adult coloring has been shown to have a ton of positive mental health effects. Plus, it's fun! But one unintended and adorable side effect of Joseph's coloring was that his young son, Philip, decided he wanted to emulate him.

Philip had always loved coloring but, Joseph says, "I had to get him some pastels, and he started trying on the same drawings as I did," Joseph says. "I found it absolutely adorable when he was seriously repeating the same movements as me: cleaning the tips of the pastels, blend the edges of colors, etc."

One thing quickly became apparent: Philip was much, much better than his old man.

"About a month ago, he made a painting that was so good I had to share it on Reddit. Within two days, it generated over 100,000 views and 3000 likes."

The overwhelming response? "Uh, 5-year-olds can't do that."

bruncvik/reddit

The first piece Philip shared is wildly impressive. Some commenters couldn't believe that a 5-year-old could have made it, but I think you can see it pretty clearly. It has just enough childlike crudeness, but the stylistic flair is just off the charts, from the whispy sky to the slightly foreboding trees. Redditors agreed that it was incredible.

"Thats better than I can do now at 25," one Reddit user wrote.

Others questioned whether the boy might be related to Bob Ross.

"I told [Philip] about it, and I guess that was his first big dopamine hit," Joseph says of going viral. "Since then, he is asking to draw more often, and there's often an intrinsic reward for him. One painting got submitted to a charity auction at his school ... I don't pressure him to draw; he's coming to me to ask whether he can use my pastels"

One critical part of the story is that Philip often follows along with YouTube videos that his dad finds for him. Lest you think this should diminish how impressive the painting is, quite the contrary. As someone with an almost-5-year-old of my own, I've seen the kind of stuff kids this age are capable of drawing — and it's not this! No matter how much instruction they have.

The structured YouTube videos were able to unlock Philip's natural talent and guide him in a way that his dad never could.

Here's the finished painting he was following along with. Honestly? I like Philip's better! It has a lot more personality.

She'z ART/YouTube

The response to Philip's first painting was so positive that his dad decided to post another piece.

You gotta give the people what they want!

I love this one, too. The youngster's talent is on display again, with an excellent color palette and aggressive strokes giving it life. Remember — the kid is five years old! Five! Usually they can barely muster a convincing stick figure.

bruncvik/reddit

And again, here's the model painting from YouTube. Joseph said his own versions of these paint-alongs come out looking a lot like the example, but that his son has an incredible way of making them his own.

She'z ART/YouTube

Philip's dad gives a lot of thought to the right way to nurture his son's talent without pushing too hard and snuffing it out.

"He attended an afterschool art club, where they experimented with different media, but he found it too restrictive. He is still bringing home new art at least twice per week, but it's something he does on his own," dad says, not sure if pushing his son into formal art instruction is the right thing to do.

Experts say that pushing too hard when your kid shows a flair for something, especially regarding longterm goals (like going to art school or becoming a professional artist one day), can backfire big time and make them feel overwhelmed and resentful.

Joseph finds other ways to encourage his son's interest.

"One thing I do with him, though, is to talk about painting when we are out and about. Last weekend, we went to watch the sunset, and I asked him what colors he'd use for the clouds. ... Philip is just as obsessed with different shades (his current favorite word is 'vermilion' and his favorite color is 'turquoise'), and how they mix."

Being the parent of a talented or gifted kid is no easy job. There are a lot of pitfalls and plenty of ways to bungle your attempts to nurture that talent. As impressive as Philip's artwork is, especially for his age, the thoughtful parenting on display in this story is just as awesome.

This article originally appeared in January.

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Mom tries to keep it together when her 3-year-old daughter demands she help her find a husband

"I want a husband!"

Photo credit: Canva

3-year-old demands her mom help to find her a husband

Kids listen to everything parents say, even when their parents aren't talking to them. You don't have to be a parent to witness or experience this adorable and sometimes hilarious parroting. A toddler repeating a swear word in their tiny baby voice will almost always fill a room with laughter and a little embarrassment for the parent.

It's how kids learn about the world around them because parents are their first teachers even when they're not attempting to be. But there are some things that you don't quite expect kids to pick up on until a little later in life so it may catch you a little off guard. Tasha Mahachi, a mom of a 3-year-old little girl, Sanaa, found herself slightly confused when her daughter exclaimed that she needed a husband. No, she wasn't saying the mom needs a husband, she already has one.

Sanaa declared that she wanted her own husband after overhearing Mahachi refer to the little girl's dad as her husband while speaking to someone else. Explaining why a 3-year-old can't have a husband to an emotional small child desperate for a husband–a pink husband to be specific.

flying pink man GIFGiphy

Mahachi shared the adorable interaction on her social media page where it racked up over 246K views. In the video, Sanaa is seen stamping her foot, clearly a bit annoyed on repeating the question. Her frustration grows after her mom breaks the news that the little girl doesn't have a husband.

"I want a husband," Sanaa whines while stomping her feet before Mahachi asks what kind of husband the preschooler wants. That's when she reveals the difficult order, "pink." Yes, Sanaa wants a pink husband. It's really not too much to ask when you think about it...when you're three. But the problem really comes into play once Sanaa stops having a small tantrum long enough for Mahachi to inform her that if she wants a husband she will have to go find one outside.

Sol Solana GIF by Bill the BearGiphy

"I not going outside," she says while pleading her case, "it's dark."

Not going outside would be a bit of a barrier to finding a husband and you can see the little wheels turning in Sanaa's head as she works out how she will collect a pink husband. So, she does what any three year old would do who wants to go outside, she asks her mom to come with her. Again she's thwarted when Mahachi breaks the news that moms and dads don't go outside to help find husbands. The pair have reached an impasse. Viewers couldn't get enough of the amusing interaction and some could relate to the girl's dilemma.


@tashamahachi She heard me calling her dad my husband and suddenly she’s desperate to get herself one too😂 #toddlersbelike #toddlerconversations #sanaaandmummy ♬ original sound - Tasha

"Ma’am go on Amazon and order her a pink husband right neowww," someone jokes.

"We can all relate. To wanting a husband, to not wanting to go outside to find him, to being scared, oh baby we get it," another laughs.

"This is what a convo between me and God sound like praying for a husband meanwhile I’m scared to meet new people, I don’t go out and i always take my best friend everywhere," one person confesses.

Looking Rachel Lindsay GIF by The BacheloretteGiphy

"I’ve never related more to a toddler. Cuz sis I’m also scared & do not want to go outside & also want a husband RN [right now]," another commenter chimes in.

"It's okay kiddo. I don't want to leave the house to find one by myself either. It's scary," someone else proclaims.

Well, Sanaa, it seems like you're not alone. Plenty of people want a husband to find them without ever having to leave the house to interact with others. Maybe ordering a pink husband online doesn't sound so silly after all.

This article originally appeared in January

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Studies show non-parents are happier than parents unless 1 of these 3 things are true

"Bundle of joy" might not be the most apt nickname.

Canva Photos

Having kids decreases your quality of life and marital satisfaction, but that doesn't mean you can't be happy.

For decades now there's been one great question looming over society: Does having kids make you happier?

Most studies show that, perhaps surprisingly, people without children tend to be happier, or have more life satisfaction. And when you really think about it, it makes sense why. Being child-free eases your finances and allows you more time to pursue friends, romance, hobbies, travel, adventure, and career aspirations. Having children makes your immediate quality of life and marital satisfaction go down temporarily, or in some cases, permanently. The Surgeon General even recently issued an advisory warning that parental stress is a major public health issue.

But there are three factors that might turn the tide. In the right circumstances, the joy and immense satisfaction of raising children can overcome all the associated stressors and lead to incredible joy and happiness. Other studies from around the globe prove that you might just be a happy parent if:

parents, parenting, moms, dads, children, kids, family, love, stress, happiness, studies, researchWhen your kids grow up and move out, it's like you've won: That's when the happiness really kicks in. Photo by Esther Ann on Unsplash

1. Your kids have moved out

A study from Heidelberg University in Germany specifically looked at happiness in people aged 50 and older. What they found makes a lot of sense.

People who have children were happier than those without, but only in the older age group, and only when those grown children no longer lived at home. Drilling down, the research found that when children become a source of "social enjoyment" rather than stress, life satisfaction increases dramatically while symptoms of depression decrease.

You can think of it as finally getting to enjoy the fruits of your hard labor. After spending decades teaching, nurturing, and shaping your children, your twilight years is when you get to really enjoy them as fully-fledged people who enrich your lives. While there's lots of joy and fun and happiness to be found in the younger years, those years are also marred with financial and other stressors which can subdue our overall happiness.

2. You have a lot of money AND good work/life balance


parents, parenting, moms, dads, children, kids, family, love, stress, happiness, studies, researchParents struggle to make enough money while devoting time to caring for and enjoying their kids. Photo by Tim Gouw on Unsplash

One study out of Bocconi University in Milan, Italy found that "Parents are happier than non-parents ... as long as parents feel they can handle their work pressures to find work/life balance and they have the financial and other resources they need."

Oh, is that all?

Some estimates say it costs roughly $24,000 per year to raise a child, on average. A family with three kids would need to make about $75,000 just to cover the absolute bare minimum food and childcare costs — yowza! The costs are more when they're young (daycare, childcare, diapers, toys) but it never stops being expensive. Parenting is also extremely time-consuming, requiring several hours per day of childcare and extra housework for most families.

The impossible conundrum that many parents find themselves in is somehow having enough money and enough time to do it all. It's easy to see that if you can somehow solve that puzzling equation, yeah, you'd be a heck of a lot happier. Easier said than done!

3. You don't live in the United States

parents, parenting, moms, dads, children, kids, family, love, stress, happiness, studies, researchParents in Spain, Norway, Sweden, Portugal, and more are enjoying more time off to spend with family. Photo by Mauro Lima on Unsplash

In 2016, The Council of Contemporary Families wanted to look into whether parental discontent was a global phenomenon or not. So, they studied parents and non-parents from 22 different countries to see if they could find any differences in life satisfaction.

The report found that parents in countries like Norway, Hungary, Portugal, Finland, Sweden and Spain were shown to be happier than non-parents.

And yet, according to Time Magazine, "Of the 22 countries the researchers studied, America has the biggest happiness differential between parents and the child-free."

The report specifically cites the high cost of childcare for young children and the limited amount of paid leave Americans receive—and not just parental leave, but simple vacation time. Countries like Spain and Portugal mandate anywhere from 22-30 paid leave days per year, while Americans average about 11. That allows for significantly less time to actually enjoy time with your kids, and has a big impact on our happiness, or lack thereof.

Of course, happiness can be measured in a lot of different ways. Is happiness a blissful feeling of freedom and joy? Or is it a deep satisfaction and sense of purpose in your life? Or maybe a combination of the two?

What the overall body of research seems to show is that there are many different paths to happiness, whether you choose to have children or not. Finding joy and satisfaction in your life as a parent might be considered "hard-mode." There are a lot of obstacles working against you, especially in America, but the research is beginning to give us some clues about how we can get there.

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