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Motherhood

Mom shares the frustrating difference between stay-at-home and working parents

"It is interesting to notice how tied we are to corporate-style success."

via EclecticHomeSchooling/TikTok (used with permission)

Syd explains one of the most frustrating parts of being a stay-at-home-mom.

We all need a pat on the back every once in a while, someone to let us know we're doing a good job. There are many ways for people with careers to feel validated. You can get a raise, a promotion, a great review from your manager, or a professional award. You can also be someone respected in your profession and a mentor to younger people entering your field. These forms of validation help someone feel valuable and accomplished and are all tangible in some way. You can say, "I’m now the vice president of manufacturing," "I won the Excellence in Sales Award," or "I have a larger number on my paycheck."

Syd, a stay-at-home mom named @eclectichomeschooling on TikTok, shared that, unfortunately, moms who work in the home have a hard time finding that same feeling of validation.

stay-at-home mom, motherhood How do you measure success as a stay-at-home mom?Giphy

“Something that I think that a lot of people don’t realize about being a stay-at-home mom, whether you are a homeschool mom or your kids are young and you’re staying home with them during those years, is that there’s no measurement of success. There’s no metric,” she begins her video.

“There’s no one saying, ‘Congratulations, you have been promoted; you are the top of the top of this skill.’ None of that,” she continued. There is no award for an outstanding stay-at-home mom, and there is no manager to give her a review or promotion.

She says that being a good mother to her kids “feels good” and “makes us happy” but argues that it isn’t something you can “hold” or “write down.”

“We’re going on eight years of not being able to measure [success],” she continued. “I think that that’s a thing that nobody really talks about or that we don’t really get to talk about with each other. Your partner goes to work: they get promoted, they get raises, they complete their work for the day and they ... get to be like, ‘OK, I succeeded.’ But my [work] is just constant, all of the time, and there’s no metric for it.”

The dishes that Syd cleans will be dirty the next day. The laundry she folds on Monday will be worn on Tuesday and rewashed on Friday.

motherhood, homemaking, stay-at-home mom, laundry Work done in the home is never "done" and often goes unrecognized. Photo credit: Canva

Although Syd has yet to find a solution to this problem, she sees other ways to get the validation she craves. “It’s hard, especially because a lot of us don’t prioritize hobbies for ourselves. That’s a great place for us to find success or a feeling of accomplishment,” she said.

Syd’s video struck a chord with many stay-at-home mothers feeling the same way.

A commenter named Leigh noted that the need for external validation comes from the corporate culture in which Americans are raised. “On my best days, it is interesting to notice how tied we are to corporate-style success. On my worst, it is inescapably crushing,” she wrote in the most popular comment.

“It's the neverending loops that are never complete. We never get the satisfaction of a ‘job well done’ because nothing is ever really done,” Hazel added. “Once I started focusing on my own happiness, it got better.”

According to Love, the lack of praise for a job well done also means that it’s easy to be criticized. “When you’re doing everything right, there’s no praise, etc., but if you do anything wrong or are not perfect, then the issue gets thrown in your face in every way. So you end up feeling like a failure,” she wrote.

Syd told Upworthy that her followers have tried to help her recontextualize her feelings of worth. “Since the video, I’ve had a lot of conversations with moms about how we measure worth by being very wrapped up in productivity through a capitalist lens. It can be tough to divest from that, but it is also so important. Like, what’s a safe and secure childhood worth? Nothing technically, but also the entire world. We do that!” she told Upworthy.

motherhood, stay-at-home mom Validation comes in different ways for stay-at-home moms.Photo credit: Canva

She adds that a few of her followers suggested she should take up martial arts as a hobby. “I’m still pondering that one,” she told Upworthy.

Ultimately, Syd’s realization could have caused her to feel down about herself or resign to a never-ending feeling of being unfulfilled. However, she’s seen it as an opportunity to reevaluate her sense of self-worth and possibly as a reason to branch off into new and exciting hobbies outside her family.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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motherhood

Family

Social worker explains why she never helps young daughter make friends, even when she's lonely

"As a parent, that's heartbreaking. As a social worker, I'm not going to do anything about it."

via Canva/Photos

A young girl being excluded at school.

One of the generational stereotypes that Millennials and Gen Zers have had foisted on them by older people is that they lack resilience. The knock isn’t completely unfounded, because many have been raised by lawnmower parents who cut down any obstacle that was in their way as children. So, as adults, they never developed the ability to handle difficult social situations. This can lead to a sense of entitlement and social anxiety.

“Lots of parents want to keep their children safe and feel the need to do all they can to achieve this, even when it is too much on them or their child,” Channing Richmond, a licensed marriage and family therapist in the San Francisco Bay Area, told Parents. That’s why Helen Turner, a social worker and LMFT, doesn’t get involved even when her first-grade daughter is feeling socially isolated at school.

young girl alone, girl with smartphone, girl window, girl stuffed animal, boredom A young girl alone at a window.via Canva/Photos

The difference between being a mom and a social worker

“My daughter has been coming home every night of first grade so far, saying that she does not have any friends at school, that no one wants to play with her. And while, as a parent, that's heartbreaking, as a social worker, I'm not gonna do anything about it,” Turner opens her viral video that has been seen over 33,000 times.

“Often times, when parents insert themselves into these kinds of things and attempt to problem solve the situation for their child because they want the problem to be fixed, what they're actually doing is taking the ability for their child to learn what to do in these situations away from their child, which in turn provides a really short term fix for something that will likely be an ongoing, long term, lifelong issue,” she continues.

What is distress tolerance?

Turner says that the ability to endure the feeling of rejection and allow it to prompt someone to take action is called distress tolerance. “Distress tolerance is a person's ability to manage actual or perceived emotional distress,” writes Matthew Tull, PhD, in Verywell Mind. “It also involves making it through an emotional incident without making it worse. People who have low distress tolerance tend to become overwhelmed by stressful situations and may sometimes turn to unhealthy or even destructive ways of coping with these difficult emotions.”

The key in this situation is to find a balance between setting your child up for success and doing things for them. Experts recommend that parents encourage children to make friends by teaching them to share and how to ask their peers to play confidently. Parents can help by teaching them the simple script: “Hi, I’m [child], would you like to play?” or “Hi, I’m [child], would you like to have lunch with me?” Parents can also set a good example by being friendly themselves and demonstrating a healthy social life. However, Turner believes that parents should avoid asking the teacher or other parents to insert their child into a friend group.

Although it may be tough for parents to watch their children feel isolated, it’ll help them form stronger relationships as they age. “If I had not had to learn that skill as a child or earlier in my life, it would feel debilitating to do now at 30 years old,” Turner says. “I don't know about you all, but I want my children to grow up and be 20s, 30s, 40s nnd not having to learn social situations for the first time then.”

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parenting

Parenting

A study left groups of kids unsupervised for 5 days. The whole thing was caught on camera.

The difference between the boys and girls was striking.

Photo credit: Canva

Experiment of boys and girls left unsupervised return eyeopening results

What would kids do if left completely to their own devices without any adult intervention? If you've never wondered that, well, you don't have to wonder anymore.

In 2016, Boys Alone (Social Experiment Documentary) took 10 boys ages 11-12 and left them unsupervised in a house for five days. Before the boys were left alone they were given cooking classes and other life skills lessons to give them all a more even starting ground.

They repeated the social experiment with girls in Girls Alone (Social Experiment Documentary). The girls are given the same life skills lessons as the boys before being left to their own devices for the better part of a week. Both groups of children were left with cameras watching their every move as adults monitored from outside of the home. But there was no interference and when the camera crew was present they did not interact or attempt to parent the children in any way.

Recently clips of these experiments resurfaced on social media when a guy with the username Mr. Cult Daddy uploaded it to share with his 508k followers.

His condensed version of the clips along with his commentary gave viewers a quick overview of the vastly different results.

"Imagine this, 10 boys all from the ages of 11 and 12 were put into a house with no adult supervision for five days. And if you heard me say that and thought to yourself that sounds like a total 'Lord of the Flies' situation, you're not wrong because it did not take long for them to completely descend into chaos," the creator shares.

Boys playing, boys, children, unsupervised kids, parenting, modern parenting shallow focus photo of boy in red crew-neck T-shirt Photo by Tolga Ahmetler on Unsplash

He explains that the boys essentially destroyed the house by drawing on the walls, flipping furniture and "trashing everything." The boys didn't use their new cooking skills, relying solely on snacks and sodas. Eventually the chaotic fun turned into power struggles, breaking into different groups fighting each other, even tying someone to a chair.

"But what's interesting about this whole thing is just how quickly their social structure that they developed just completely fell apart. What started out as excitement turned into isolation depression," the man says.

The TikTok creator jumps into sharing the commentary from others around the societal expectations of boys being able to get away with more which people feel had an impact on the way these boys behaved.

On the flip side, the girls experiment had wildly different results. The girls were the same age as the boys but instead of immediately descending into chaos, they actually worked together.

One commenter writes about the boys, "Grown men live like this too. It’s not an age thing," with another person saying, "That’s the least shocking outcome ever."

kids, children, unsupervised children, parenting, modern parenting, parenting advice, parenting hacks Teens playing table tennis Photo by Nima Sarram on Unsplash

"As we know the boys descended into chaos relatively quickly so you might say to yourself, 'oh we can expect the same things from these girls,' no. From the start the girls organize themselves. They made a freaking chore chart, took turns cooking, cleaning. meals were planned, they didn't just survive off the snacks like the boys did. They really created this team," he shares.

The girls also painted on the walls but it was productive paintings like murals and not painting to make a mess. Evidently the girls all worked together and provided each other emotional support according to the creator. They even cleaned the house before they left. It would seem that people in the comments were not at all surprised by the stark contrast between the girls and boys experiment.

One woman tells the creator, "by 12 I could have run a whole household."

"I think it's probably 15-20% prefrontal cortex and 75-80% conditioning. I was expected to wash the dishes every night by myself from a young age while my male sibling went to bed. I was made to do his homework, even tho I was 2y younger, so he'd have free time to "be a typical boy." I'm the reason he passed elementary school, but I refused after that and his grades crashed," another woman reveals.

children, raising children, unsupervised children, parents, parenting, modern parenting two girl in pink and green shirts sitting on wall shelf Photo by Cristina Gottardi on Unsplash

"I think it shows the difference in raising. Girls are taught to behave, be smart. Boys tend to be spoiled by moms and dads. They don’t usually receive the learning of being nice, cordial," someone else shares.

"It's conditioning (at least 80%) my brother is 9 years older and I had to teach him how to do his own laundry when I was 14 (he was ripe ol' age of 23) bc my mom taught me from a young age and didn't," one commenter explains.

While many people agree that the culprit is social conditioning combined with brain development while others pointed out that it may simply be American culture. That also likely plays a large role in the outcome of these experiments, but what do you think? If the experiment was completed again today, would the results be the same?

You can watch the entire boys experiment here and the girls experiment here.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

From Your Site Articles

children

Health

'Who should I be?': Video explains why having a self-absorbed parent robs you of a personality

Having a self-absorbed parent is a terrible trap.

Canva/Photos

A man sitting alone with a blank stare.

Have you ever met someone who doesn’t seem to have their own thoughts, opinions, or tastes? They tend to glom onto the personalities of their friends and will change their views on important issues, such as politics or religion, on a whim. When you try to get a sense of their core, it doesn’t seem there is much of one at all.

According to the School of Life, a social media company founded by writer Alain de Botton that helps people better understand themselves and others, a significant reason people around us appear to lack a true sense of self is that they were born to self-absorbed parents. So, if you’re having a hard time understanding a friend who has a weak sense of self or fear you have one yourself, here’s how School of Life explains the issue.

- YouTube youtu.be

Why do some people lack a strong sense of self?

“These poor souls tend to be the products of very particular sorts of childhood. When little, they will have faced environments in which their uniqueness was never a matter of concern to their self-absorbed caregivers. Mother or father were never able to push their needs aside for a time, drop to their level and ask: Who is this extraordinary new member of the human race whom I have helped to create? What are their particular inclinations and loves, and hates? What do they have to tell me? They were far too perturbed and fragile for such self-abnegation. They couldn’t attune to the child—and so the child could not, in turn, attune to themselves, for we can only find out what we think if, in the early days, someone was sufficiently patient to facilitate our own process of self-discovery,” the video states.

sad girl, lonely girl confused girl, personality, self-absorbed parents, girl touching face A girl who is outside and holding her cheeks.via Canva/Photos

It can be tough for someone to go through life with a weak sense of self because they are constantly worried by the opinions of others, and they have a loud inner critic. The pain of having to repress their true selves for years can lead them to have an intense internal rage that they keep deep down, until they can no longer hold it back anymore.

Those who build friendships or fall in love with individuals who have a weak sense of self may be initially charmed by them. They are interested in everything that we love and are happy to mirror us in an incredibly flattering way. Until, of course, the winds change and they follow someone new, transforming into someone completely different. “We can find ourselves dropped like a stone,” the video says. “And yet ironically, we may have been very right for them: they just didn’t know enough about who they were to trust their original instincts.”

man in suit, confident man, man with tie, man in blue suit, man with beard A man in a blue suit.via Canva/Photos

How can people regain their sense of self?

A medically reviewed article from Psych Central shows that people raised by self-absorbed parents can strengthen their sense of self by tuning into themselves instead of looking to others for direction. That inner voice may be faint at first, but when given proper attention, it can become louder.

How to cultivate a strong sense of self according to Psych Central:

Take time to analyze what your thoughts say about the type of person you are. Do you think of yourself as someone smart, funny, kind, and competent?

Try to believe in who you are and the person you can become. Thinking of yourself as a “work in progress” can help lower the volume on your inner critic.

Exercise your mental muscle of self-awareness. Regular examination of how you think and feel about yourself can foster greater insight and appreciation of your sense of self.

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psychology

Kids

Woman without kids cancels trip with mom friends because she's sick of hearing about babies

"It's not the weekend for me."

via Kampus Production/Pexels

Five women hold their bellies in a baby shower photo.

Getting married and having a child is a huge life change and so when a group of friends goes through the same experience together, it’s a great way to bond. Unfortunately, for some people, these changes on the domestic front can take over their lives and become their entire personality.

People who are single and aren’t looking to have kids any time soon can have a hard time relating to their friends who are married with children because they have less in common. Further, when you don’t have children, it can be a little tedious to hear people talk all day about lactation, sleep schedules and spitting up.

These topics can be boring to people who have children, too.

children, family, friendship, vacation, childfree, having kids A woman without kids says she's tired of hearing about her friends' babiesImage via Canva

A Redditor who goes by Remarkable_Lake410, who we’ll call RL for brevity’s sake, recently ran into this problem with her friends. Instead of feigning interest in married mom life, she decided to be honest with them about why she didn’t want to join them on a trip.

“I (27F) have a group of female friends (8 of us). We have been friends for over a decade, since school. Now, we don’t live in the same place, but we meet up a couple of times a year for a weekend on an Airbnb. This used to be a weekend of good food, drinks, hot tub, etc.” she wrote on the AITH forum.

“Around five of my friends are either married or in very long-term relationships. Of these five, two either have a baby or are pregnant. I will be seeing all of my friends this year for various wedding, friend and baby events. I have been invited to this year's girls' trip, but I have said I can’t come. I didn’t originally provide a reason,” she continued.

But a friend pushed her to find out why she didn’t want to go on the trip and she was honest: She didn’t want to be stuck constantly hearing about babies, marriage and weddings on a trip that was going to cost a significant amount of money.

“[Last time], I listened to one of my friends talk about her breastfeeding plans, with vengeance, for over an hour. She is not pregnant or trying. Truthfully, it’s boring, and it feels dismissive,” RL wrote. It’s also a really expensive way to feel bad about myself.”

When her friend heard her reason, she was “really hurt,” and it felt like RL didn’t care about her and her other friends. So, RL asked the Reddit forum if she was in the wrong for being honest and skipping a trip that would be all about marriage and babies.

The post received over 4,000 responses that were overwhelmingly supportive for RL.

family, kids, vacation, women, babies, having children, not having children The woman received a wave of support for her decision to not travel with family-obsessed friendsImage via Canva

"On the surface, this seems like it’s just about engagements, weddings and babies. You go out of your way to be constantly supportive of them. However they don’t reciprocate that for you. They can’t relate to anything or want to relate to anything outside of their lives. It would sort of be like if you just won an award, but all they talked about was the pie they just ate that morning," Dependant_praline_93 wrote in the most popular comment.

"We all change as we get older. You naturally drift apart from some friends, especially if their lifestyle changes dramatically (think married with children, in particular). I wouldn't want to spend a lot of money to spend 3 days with a group that had such dis-similar interests. And I don't think it was wrong to be truthful when your friend asked you why you wouldn't go," Smokin_HOT_Ice added.

women, vacation, kids, parenting, not having kids, vacation without kids Two women talk while drinking teaImage via Canva

One commenter with kids has a close friend who is a child-free and she has made an effort to ask her about her life and interests of just talking about parenting.

“I was 38 when I had my first child and I read an article in Working Mother magazine when I was pregnant, and it said not to be the jerk who always talks about your pregnancy and your baby to your friends, especially the ones without babies,” JellyBear135 wrote. “When I see her, I always ask about her work, her activities outside of work and recently, her new baby dog. She lives alone and doesn’t have a lot of people who always ask about her life so I make sure I always do. I check in via text every couple of weeks to ask her about her life.”

After receiving a huge response from her post, RL wrote an update revealing that another friend who’s in the same boat decided not to go on the trip as well. “I have spoken to one of my other friends invited on the trip (who is also not at the baby stage of life); she is also not going on the trip and said she is not attending for the same reason,” RL wrote.

It seems the big takeaway from RL’s dilemma isn’t just that stage-of-life changes such as marriage and having babies can create chasms in friendships. But we need to make sure that we’re not just talking about ourselves to our friends but listening to them as well. Because a one-way friendship isn’t a friendship at all.

This article originally appeared last year.

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family

Parenting

8 baby names have officially hit 'gender neutral' status, with several more on the cusp

Some surprising names are now split 50/50 among baby boys and girls.

Photo credit: Canva

Baby names are moving toward more gender neutrality.

When people come up with names for their children, they often choose them based on the baby's gender (based on sex at birth). Many families will have a list of boy names and girl names at the ready, but it's all a little precarious because what constitutes a gender-specific name is constantly changing.

For instance, the name Avery has seen a dramatic shift in gendered use over the past century or so. According to Social Security Administration data, Avery was 100% a boy's name in 1880. By 1999, it was being used for girls 52% of the time (basically gender-neutral), and by 2018, Avery was being used for girls 97% of the time. Clearly, a boy's name, a girl's name, or an unisex name depends entirely upon the age in which you live.

baby names, naming children, boy names, girl names, gender neutral names, unisex names Some names are split exactly 50/50 between boys and girls. Photo credit: Canva

So, where are we with all of this in 2025? After analyzing the tens of thousands of baby name registrations on its website, BabyCenter has listed eight new names under the officially gender-neutral umbrella, meaning 50% of babies registered with this name are girls and 50% are boys.

8 baby names that became totally gender neutral in 2025

Blake

A name with two opposing meanings feels pretty appropriate for a unisex name. From the Old English blaec, Blake means "black," and from the Old English blac, it means "white" or "pale."

blake lively, blake, gender neutral name, unisex name, baby names Blake is officially a unisex name. Giphy

Jojo

Jojo can be a nickname for any name that starts with "Jo," like Jonathan ("God has given") or Joanne ("God is gracious").

Jules

Aside from taking inspiration from Jules Verne, Jules can be a nickname for Julian or Julia, both of which have roots in Latin related to Jupiter.

Koi

Yep, like the fish. Koi is a Japanese name that means carp, but it also means "love."

koi, fish, carp, gender neutral name, the name koi Koi is used as a name for boys and girls in equal measure. Giphy

Landry

Landry means "ruler of the land," and also "laundry," but let's assume most parents are going with the former.

Robin

The backyard bird, yes. But Robin is also an archaic nickname for Robert, which means "bright, famous one."

Sidney

Sidney (which can also be spelled like the Australian city of Sydney, which is more common for girls) means "dweller by the well-watered land" in Old English.

sidney, sydney, gender neutral, sidney poitier, baby names From Sidney Poitier to Sidney Sweeney, Sidney is an androgynous name. Giphy

Sri

Sri is a Sanskrit name that is sometimes used as an honorific in Hindi culture. It has a few meanings, including "light, beauty, and prosperity," and "power and royal majesty."

Some might note that a few of these names—Robin and Sidney in particular—have been functionally gender-neutral for a long time. Others on the list are not very common in American culture, so they may not feel like names that were ever gendered to begin with. But the data says what the data says, and this is where we are in 2025.

baby names, naming children, boy names, girl names, gender neutral names, unisex names Some names have moved away from gender specificity.Photo credit: Canva

The popular baby site has also shared a handful of names that are on the cusp of being 50/50 but not quite there:

Armani (47% girls, 53% boys)

Ashtyn (46% girls, 54% boys)

Callaway (47% girls, 53% boys)

Georgie (53% girls, 47% boys)

Huntley (48% girls, 52% boys)

Jae (47% girls, 53% boys)

Rory (49% girls, 51% boys)

Shiloh (52% girls, 48% boys)

Tatum (44% girls, 56% boys)

Yuri (49% girls, 51% boys)

baby names, naming children, boy names, girl names, gender neutral names, unisex names What makes a name gender specific?Photo credit: Canva

What causes names to shift away from gender specificity?

Names being gendered is purely a social construct, so it's not like there are any actual rules at play here. But like many naming trends, popular culture and entertainment can influence what names are considered masculine, feminine, or unisex.

Let's go back to Avery, for example. Avery is a variation of Alfred and was solely a boy's name in the late 1800s. But it wasn't a popular name for either gender until the 1990s, when it started to rise for boys in 1992 and then skyrocketed for girls in 1996. What caused the big spike for girls? Best guess is the film "Jerry Maguire," which had a female character (Tom Cruise's girlfriend in the beginning, played by Kelly Preston) named Avery. That movie came out in 1996, and that's also the year the name took off for girls in the U.S. Coincidence, perhaps, but probably not.

scrubs, elliott, sarah chalke, gender neutral name, unisex name Elliott didn't take off as a girl's name like it could have. Giphy

Then again, the popular TV show Scrubs, which ran from 2001 to 2010, had a central female character named Elliott, and that didn't seem to lead to an uptick in girls named Elliott. In fact, Elliott didn't even register statistically for girls until 2013 (though maybe people streaming the show did make a delayed impact).

Whether it's the influence of entertainment, shifts in gender theory, or parents moving away from name uniformity, gender-neutral names are on the rise. It will be interesting to see how many other traditionally gendered names move toward the middle in the coming years.

You can view the full report on unisex names on BabyCenter here.

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baby names

Motherhood

Clever mom had a perfect rebuttal for a neighbor's complaint about her kid's sidewalk chalk

The mom had some "big" words for the nosy neighbor.

Canva Photos

Nosy neighbor complains about sidewalk chalk drawing and gets a big surprise.

No neighborhood would be complete without that one neighbor who complains about the pettiest things. The big problem comes when you live in a shared building or have a homeowner's association where that nosy neighbor has the power to make your life miserable.

Some people choose to take umbrage with the smallest of perceived slights, like visible trash cans out in the driveway, a few unpulled weeds, or a mailbox that's seen better days. Others take things a step further and start coming after the kids for playing, making noise, and generally doing things that kids tend to do. And that's where good citizens tend to draw their line in the sand.

Ashley Woodfolk, a young adult fiction writer in Brooklyn, couldn't believe it when she received a complaint via the board at her co-cop: Someone had complained about her toddler writing in sidewalk chalk in the courtyard of her building.

Sidewalk chalk, can you believe it? Not only does sidewalk chalk easily wash away, but the complaint was about usage of the common courtyard.

You could understand if the anonymous complainer didn't like kids drawing, say, directly on their own door or steps. But this is just a barely veiled message that kids aren't welcome in the neighborhood.

sidewalk chalk, hoa complaints, brooklyn, neighbors, nosy neighbors, kids, family, moms, motherhood, culture Who would ever complain about this? Giphy

For those who live outside of New York City, a co-op is a type of housing where each resident is a shareholder in a corporation and pays for their living area based on its size. Co-ops usually have a committee or board that meets to handle issues that arise in the building, not unlike a typical HOA in a suburban neighborhood.

It's incredible to believe that someone would be so shallow that they'd complain about a toddler drawing in sidewalk chalk. All it takes is a hose or a light rain and the chalk will disappear forever.

Woodfolk was incensed that someone would make such a complaint. So she decided to apologize to the woman by writing her a letter

Oh, and the letter was absolutely massive, written on the entirety of the outside courtyard, in sidewalk chalk. Talk about a mic drop.

Woodfolk shared photos and the text of the letter in a post on X, where it went mega viral to the tune of 15k reposts.

"This will be my last time using sidewalk chalk in the courtyard since it seems to be such a problem for you (and only for you). I'm sorry harmless fun that brought my toddler joy (and has actually helped him learned all of his letters and most of his numbers –– his favorites are E and 8) causes you so much distress that you had to complain to the board and waste everyone's time when our building has much bigger real problems.

"I think you're aware that we're in a pandemic and while I'd love to take my kid to museums and the movies I don't feel safe doing that, and sometimes even local parks are more crowded than I'm comfortable with. The courtyard was a safe space but now there are limits on that too. There only a few weeks of nice weather left, and I sincerely hope you enjoy the use of the sidewalk-chalk free courtyard for the remainder of the fall. And I hope that every time it rains, rain that would have washed away any colorful ABCs I wrote on the ground, you think of me."

All my love, Ashley."

To make sure she got her message across, she also left a (smaller copy of the) letter for the woman in the lobby of the building.

According to Woodfolk's later update, the woman got the message.

Woodfolk doesn't blame the board for having to hear about the complaint. She assumes they heard about it multiple times and had to give her the news because they didn't want to be harassed.

Users were in utter disbelief, and excited to cheer Woodfolk on in her quest for petty revenge.

"I love this and you're amazing," one user wrote.

"Dealing with this myself at our apartment complex. It's crazy how many grinches there are in the world. Fight for the kids!" added another

One follower who owns an Etsy shop where she makes sidewalk chalk in adorable shapes offered to send Woodfolk's child a set.

Let's hope that Woodfolk's dramatic reaction teaches the woman, and anyone else who wants to make petty complaints, that they should think twice before reporting someone to the board. They just might get a taste of their own pettiness in a glorious way.

This article originally appeared four years ago. It has been updated.

From Your Site Articles

kids

children

Mom shares the frustrating difference between stay-at-home and working parents

"It is interesting to notice how tied we are to corporate-style success."

The difference between being a mom and a social worker

What is distress tolerance?

A study left groups of kids unsupervised for 5 days. The whole thing was caught on camera.

The difference between the boys and girls was striking.

'Who should I be?': Video explains why having a self-absorbed parent robs you of a personality

Having a self-absorbed parent is a terrible trap.

Why do some people lack a strong sense of self?

How can people regain their sense of self?

Woman without kids cancels trip with mom friends because she's sick of hearing about babies

"It's not the weekend for me."

8 baby names have officially hit 'gender neutral' status, with several more on the cusp

Some surprising names are now split 50/50 among baby boys and girls.

8 baby names that became totally gender neutral in 2025

Blake

Jojo

Jules

Koi

Landry

Robin

Sidney

Sri

What causes names to shift away from gender specificity?

Clever mom had a perfect rebuttal for a neighbor's complaint about her kid's sidewalk chalk

The mom had some "big" words for the nosy neighbor.

Neuroscientist Andrew Huberman shares 'really weird' trick to fall asleep in five minutes

A hundred years ago, everyone wore hats. In 1960, they suddenly stopped. Here's why.

A millennial was annoyed that boomer parents hoard food. But there's a deeper reason for it.

A dad was camping with his kids when a fellow camper slipped him this handwritten note