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Woman refuses to communicate information to mother-in-law

Women are often saddled with the mental load of the household in romantic relationships, there are multiple articles covering the topic. It can be daunting to be in charge of remembering all of the things, essentially becoming a house manager by default. Many times this isn't an arrangement that is discussed, it seems to be either an expectation due to parental modeling or falling into gender roles.

Morgan Strickell was not planning to fall into the trap of being her family's sole organizer and distributer of information. This was a boundary she and her husband were clear about before getting married but recently had to reinforce. The soon-to-be mom, took to her TikTok page to explain that she is not interested in being her husband's "kin keeper."

Strickell is pregnant with her first child and after news was posed on social media, her mother in law's feeling were hurt after finding out the news second hand. It was this situation that prompted the woman's video.


"I refuse to be the primary communicator with my husband's side of the family," Strickell starts. "A few weeks ago my mother-in-law was on the phone with us and she expressed that she was a little bit hurt because she keeps finding out things about our pregnancy from her sister who sees the posts on social media."

The woman explains that this is news to her as she assumed her husband had been communicating the news to his mother. So when they had another ultrasound appointment she reminded her husband to send the information to his mom, to which he asked why she couldn't inform his mom for him. That's when Strickwell had to reinforce her boundary, reminding him that it is his job to inform his side of the family of important information.

Strickwell has a good relationship with her mother in-law and speaks to her on a fairly regular basis, so it's not a matter of an unpleasant relationship. The soon-to-be mom is simply not adding additional things to her plate that then become the expectation. Many people in the comments agreed with her approach.

@morganstrickell #family #momsoftiktok #inlaws ♬ original sound - Morgan Elisa Strickell

I'm on your side and I'm actually the mom of three boys who don't communicate with me, but it is their responsibility to keep me in the loop not their wives," a commenter says.

"Last year my husband told me I was wrong for not including his mom in my Mother's Day shopping and I kindly reminded him that we in fact do not share the same mom," another writes.

"Stay strong on this, it only gets worse after the kid is born," someone declares.

"You are correct and the next thing he'll have you do is buying birthday presents birthday cards for his family and everything becomes your responsibility," another person says.

In another video, Strickell clarified that her husband isn't worried about his communication in with his mother. She also says this isn't an issue that comes up often in their relationship because he is very good at communicating with his family. But Strickwell's intention was to use that example as a means to make sure people are aware that the responsibility of communication doesn't have to fall on the female partner in the relationship.


This article originally appeared on 5.11.24

Working moms are filing for divorce more often

Being a parent is a full time job but without the money and health benefits. Kissing scrapped knees, planning meals, scheduling doctor appointments, extracurricular activities, PTO meetings, the list could go on for days. But in today's society many women with children not only work inside the home but outside as well because a two income household is necessary in many cases. So why are moms leaving their marriages to do it all on their own?

Divorce attorney, Dennis Vetrano Jr. posted a video to TikTok that has over 7.4 million views, explaining the rise of working moms filing for divorce. The revelation came as no surprise to women or other divorce attorneys who commented under Vetrano's video but it may be surprising to some men.

You know how there's that saying that girls mature faster than boys, the initiation of divorce by working moms may be a continuation of that notion.


"I'm seeing working moms doing it all, and I'm seeing the husbands step back and say, huh I don't gotta do a thing. She's got the kids, she's got the groceries, she's got the laundry, she's got the meals, she's got the work," Vetrano says. "That's the theme and women are tired."

Over the past few decades women have taken on more roles outside of the home out of necessity and desire but their load inside the home hasn't decreased. The wives Vetrano is speaking about have partners who haven't caught up with the evolution of roles. Essentially still living like the 50s expecting their wives to take care of all household responsibilities while ignoring the fact that their wives work outside of the home just like they do.

"We even filed the divorce, find the attorney, created the child custody schedule," one woman wrote.

"After my divorce I had one less child to take care of. Leveled up," another commented.

"I will never forget the day I said 'if i'm doing it all by myself, I might as well be by myself,'" someone else wrote.

Another divorce lawyer even chimed in saying that her clients who are women are often much happier after divorce. It certainly makes you wonder about the maturity theme here. Not in the way of men being immature but women adapting much more quickly to societal shifts as some men struggle to keep up or even see the correlation that leads to divorce.

Take a look at the video below and if you're feeling extra adventurous, check out the comments under the main video to see if you agree with the sentiments women are expressing.

@drvlaw

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