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Abortion rights are in trouble. Here are 9 actions you can take to protect them.

The time has come to defend women's right to choose.

It's been a tough start to 2017 for abortion rights.

Photo by Olivier Douliery/Getty Images.

Just days into office, President Trump reinstated the Reagan-era "global gag rule" that strips aid to nongovernmental organizations that offer (or even discuss) abortion services with patients. On Jan. 24, the House of Representatives approved a bill that would make the anti-abortion Hyde Amendment permanent. Trump's choice for secretary of Health and Human Services is staunchly anti-choice. And Rep. Steve King (R-Iowa) introduced a "heartbeat" ban on abortion (almost certainly meant to provoke a legal challenge to the Supreme Court's Roe v. Wade decision).


Like I said, it's been a tough start to the year for abortion rights — and it's only January.

With so much happening all at once, it's easy to feel lost and unsure how best to show your support. Luckily, there are ways. Many ways.

First off, it's important that those of us who support reproductive rights recognize that we're not alone. According to the Pew Research Center, the majority of Americans (57%) believe abortion should be legal in all or most cases, the highest level of support in more than 20 years.

So let's say that you're part of that 57%. Now what?

Here are nine real things you can do and groups you can support in the fight for abortion rights in the U.S.

1. Support national and local abortion funds by donating or participating in fun fundraising campaigns.

Most people who want to support family planning, abortion rights, and factually accurate sex education donate to Planned Parenthood. And that's great! Keep doing that! But if you want to support an organization specifically to help make abortion more accessible, you should check out the The National Network of Abortion Funds (NNAF). Abortion funds help individuals who need abortions, but can't afford them, pay for them. When you donate to the NNAF, your money is going directly to help people exercise their constitutionally protected right to an abortion.

In the past, people have found creative ways to help fundraise for abortion funds. For example, there's the Taco or Beer Challenge modeled after the Ice Bucket Challenge. Another fun way to help is by signing up for events like the annual National Abortion Access Bowl-a-Thon (which will be back this April).

A graphic from the 2016 TOBC. Image from NNAF/Tumblr.

The NAFF centers around tenets of intersectionality, autonomy, collective power, and compassion for people in need of abortion. The group provides support to around 70 organizations throughout the country (many of which you can donate to directly if you'd like — they'd probably appreciate that).

2. Support reproductive rights and abortion advocacy organizations.

There is a long list of groups fighting for safe, legal, and accessible abortion throughout the U.S. — some better known than others. Of course, there's Planned Parenthood (a group that seems to be under near constant attack from anti-choice politicians), NARAL Pro-Choice America, the National Abortion Federation, and the Center for Reproductive Rights.

Other organizations to consider supporting include the National Organization for Women, the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU), All* Above All, A is For, Backline (known for their national pregnancy talkline), the Sea Change Program (a group working to reduce stigma), Unite for Reproductive & Gender Equality (URGE), the National Black Women's Reproductive Agenda, the Lilith Fund (helping abortion-seekers in Texas find access), DKT International (the largest family planning organization in the developing world), the Haven Coalition (a New York-based group providing travel and lodging assistance for women traveling to New York for an abortion), the National Women's Health Network, the Women's Global Network for Reproductive Rights (WGNRR), Ipas (a group dedicated to ending preventable deaths and disabilities from unsafe abortion), PCIGlobal (a group focused on ending physical, sexual, and mental violence against women), and the National Latina Institute for Reproductive Health.

3. Participate in abortion storytelling campaigns.

You or someone you know has almost certainly had an abortion. While the "1 in 3" estimate that's often tossed around is almost certainly a bit high, the fact is that abortion is more common than you probably think. Unfortunately, abortion remains pretty stigmatized by society, and that's why it's so important that those who are willing and able to speak up about their experiences do so.

For many people, having an abortion isn't really a huge deal and the overwhelming majority (95%) of those who have had one don't regret it. Still, because of the stigma surrounding it, many might not feel comfortable discussing their experiences. You can help change that!

Whether it's participating in social media campaigns like #ShoutYourAbortion, telling your story through a site like We Testify, or hosting a teach-in through the Abortion Truth Project, sharing abortion stories plays a powerful role in battling the stigma that surrounds the procedure.

4. Call your legislators at both local and national levels.

Calling your legislators is one of the best ways to show your support or opposition to any issue close to your heart. Is your representative pro-choice? Give her a call. How's your senator planning on voting on an upcoming bill? Give him a call. It's important to remember that our elected officials are meant to represent their constituents — that means you!

There are some great guides too. Former Congressional staffer Emily Ellsworth's "Call the Halls" guide is a tremendous resource to have at the ready. If you're the type of person who struggles with phone anxiety, here's a really cool Tumblr graphic. And if you need help coming up with a script or finding the right number, check out 5 Calls.

It doesn't have to be boring either! Maybe you can organize a call or postcard writing party with friends, complete with drinks, food, and prizes where you get together and contact your reps.

5. Run for office. Yes, you.

The day after the massive global Women's March, 500 women in Washington, D.C. gathered to discuss taking the energy from the march and channeling it into a political movement. The group worked together with EMILY's List to learn the basics of getting involved in politics, and you can too!

As our new president has shown us, no prior political experience is no problem. But you don't have to run for president or Congress to make a difference. Consider getting involved with smaller local races if that's more your speed. Getting involved on a state, county, or municipal level can help make a real change in the world.

6. Promote comprehensive sex education.

Photo by Ted Aljibe/Getty Images.

It turns out that there are a couple surefire ways to reduce the number of unintended pregnancies in the world (which, in turn, has the effect of reducing the number of abortions as well): ensuring access to contraception and improving the type of sex education we provide in schools. In fact, a recent study found that abortion is at an all-time low, and it appears to be a direct result of an improvement in both of those areas.

One obvious way to get involved in setting the agenda for sex education is finding a spot on your local school board (see point #5) or at least attending the board's meetings with the public.

7. Talk to friends and family about why abortion rights matter to you.

Large-scale projects dedicated to helping change public opinion using celebrities and stories from strangers about why pregnant people should have the ability to make their own decisions about their bodies are one thing, but there's nothing quite like hearing something from someone you trust. Sure, it might be a bit awkward, but at the end of the day, it might help reduce stigma (see point #3) and inspire others to feel more open in discussing the topic.

The National Network of Abortion Funds put together a quick guide on talking to your loved ones about abortion.

8. Volunteer as a clinic escort.

It can be hard for some people to feel safe and comfortable walking into an abortion provider's office. Protesters can make going to a clinic a scary event, but that's why clinic escorts exist.

Clinic escorts are individuals who help guide patients and staff in and out of abortion providers' offices, offering distractions to patients and just generally trying to reduce what can be a traumatic time. Planned Parenthood recently shared information on how to become a volunteer clinic escort.

Additionally, you can support the Clinic Vest Project, an organization that provides brightly colored escort vests to volunteers for free.

9. Vote. Really — vote.

Photo by Ringo Chiu/Getty Images.

One of the most direct things you can do to help influence policy is to become an informed participant in the democratic process. It's an unfortunate fact that more than 92 million eligible voters stayed home this past Election Day. The presidential election, itself, came down to around just 80,000 votes spread out over three states. Your vote matters!

brown fish beside coral under body of water

The ocean covers more than 70 percent of our planet—yet there’s so much about it that we don’t yet know. Experts, in fact, believe we’ve only explored about five percent of the ocean so far—meaning that most of it remains completely unseen and undiscovered.

What we do know, however, is that the ocean is truly wise. Not only does it sustain all human and animal life on the planet, the creatures under the sea continue to give scientists insight that can transform human lives as well (just read about the amazing axolotl below to see what we mean).

A happy ocean makes for happy, healthy human beings (not to mention a healthy planet)—so this summer we’re helping our friends at Ocean Wise spread the word that no action is too small—holding a cleanup on a local shoreline, for instance. Learning about our ocean and all its wonders is another step anyone can take for conservation, so buckle in and prepare for a tidal wave of info that will blow your mind.

1. Playing music—specifically, recordings of healthy reef soundscapes—can help grow coral reef populations.

live coralsPhoto by QUI NGUYEN on Unsplash

Healthy coral reef populations are filled with diverse sounds, thanks to the fish, snapping shrimp, and other marine life that live there. Scientists have found that playing recorded sounds of healthy reefs actually attract coral larvae, since the sounds indicate a healthy, vibrant habitat. Using this knowledge, scientists have taken recorded reef sounds, played them near degraded reefs, and in doing so, have increased the settlement rates of coral larvae, helping the coral reefs regenerate.

2. Dolphins like to party with pufferfish.

Photo by Talia Cohen on Unsplash

How’s this for a good time? Dolphins, particularly younger ones, have been known to seek out pufferfish to play games with them, chewing on them and passing them back and forth between each other like a hacky sack. Not only is this entertainment for the dolphins, scientists theorize that they may intentionally be trying to get the pufferfish to give off a neurotoxin called tetrodotoxin (TTX)–which is a chemical they release when threatened. This chemical is highly toxic in large doses–but in small quantities, experts think that it might induce a mild, pleasurable effect in the dolphins, similar to a narcotic. Party on.

3. Male humpback whales are total crooners.

A male humpback whale breaches the water.

Photo by Thomas Kelley on Unsplash

All humpback whales can vocalize, but male humpback whales actually sing.

During mating season, scientists have observed male humpback whales making sounds that are distinctly different from other humpback calls. Unlike other sounds, these songs have a clear structure, and use small, repetitive “phrases” organized in a specific sequence—in the same way humans sing different verses during a song. Even more amazing? Male humpbacks all sing the same song together in “choruses,” in sessions that last from five minutes to several hours.

4. Axolotls have superpowers (and scientists think it could benefit humans one day).

a couple of animals that are in some waterPhoto by T K on Unsplash

Among biologists, axolotls are known for their ability to regrow lost or damaged tissue. When an adult axolotl loses a limb, they can actually grow it back in just a few months time, thanks to a substance they produce called retinoic acid, which plays a large role in regenerating skin cells. (If the name sounds familiar, it’s because retinoic acid is a derivative of Vitamin A, and it’s commonly found in skin creams.) While we already know that retinoic can make our skin look fabulous, scientists are currently studying whether it could someday help human limbs regrow, similar to the axolotl’s.

5. A healthy ocean can help reverse climate change

green algae underwater photographyPhoto by Brian Yurasits on Unsplash

The ocean generates half of the oxygen we breathe and absorbs nearly a third of the world’s carbon emissions. Phytoplankton, the microscopic algae that float near the ocean’s surface, are a big part of the reason why. But there’s another unsung hero—kelp. Unlike phytoplankton, kelp are large seaweeds that grow in dense underwater forests along coastlines, absorbing CO2 and supporting ecosystems. Ocean Wise is helping bring back these powerful carbon sinks one kelp forest at a time.

Help us #BeOceanWise by doing one small thing for ocean conservation in your community (because just one thing can start a huge wave of positive change). Visit ocean.orgfor tips and tricks to keep our oceans healthy because no action is too small.

Image via Canva

Frugal people open up about how they save money.

Saving money is never a bad thing. And for those looking for economical solutions for how to cut back on spending, a smart place to start is taking an inventory of your spending habits and what you buy.

In an online forum of frugal people, member TS1664 posed the question to fellow savvy financial members: "What’s something you stopped buying completely and don’t miss at all?"

They continued, "For me it’s paper towels. Switched to rags and microfiber cloths a year ago and haven’t looked back. I used to go through a roll a week without thinking, now I just toss the cloths in with regular laundry. Saves money and space."

And they ended the post with some more insight. "It made me realize how many things I was buying out of habit, not need. What things others have cut out completely that turned out to be no big deal or even better without. Could use some inspiration!"

The callout garnered some excellent real-life advice from frugal people. These are 30 things that thrifty people shared they stopped buying completely that helped save them money.

save money, saving money, money habits, money advice, savingMake It Rain Money GIF by A Little Late With Lilly SinghGiphy

"Dryer sheets." Super-Examination594

"Starbucks - bought an espresso machine, took some time to learn how to dial it in and pull a proper shot. It’s been 4+ Years and don’t miss it one bit." Fox_137

"Makeup! Used to wear it every day and buy tons of it to try new products and such. Now I only wear it for special occasions. It works great — even just a little bit of makeup really pops when you hardly ever wear any." VerschwendeMeineZeit

"Soda. Too expensive now. Pre-pandemic, sometimes Kroger would have a sale (4) 12-packs for $10." NotJimIrsay

"Cigarettes 😊." rickety_picket

bottled water, bottled waters, water, plastic water bottle, water martial arts water GIFGiphy

"Bottled water." WorriedPermission872

"Most fast food but especially McDonald's and bk. When I paid $20 for two adults' meals, it stopped making sense, and I'll cook better burgers and better sides fries at home for less." diegothengineer

"Cable tv subscription." nombreusuario

"Pizza delivery service. Frozen meals are just as unhealthy, but much cheaper." The_Keri2

"We started our pizza making journey by buying dough (under $2) at trader joe's. it really lowered the barrier to entry. once we kind of perfected the bake etc, we started playing with dough recipes until we found one we loved. it sounds painful but it was a good learning experience and fun to do together." suddenlymary

candles, candle, scented candle, buying candles, glass candlechristmas sniffs GIF by TargetGiphy

"I stopped buying scented candles. I used to grab them all the time on impulse, but they’re expensive, don’t last that long, and honestly gave me headaches half the time. Now I just open a window or boil some citrus peels with cloves if I want the place to smell nice." HollisWhitten

"Cigarettes and nicotine pouches! Been smoke free since august 2021 and pouch free since July 2024 :)." HueLord3000

"Amazon Prime. We stopped paying for the privilege of shopping and making money for Bozo. Now, we just put stuff in the cart until there is enough for free shipping. I don’t miss Prime, I never found anything on Prime video I wanted to watch once that wasn’t a rental. We live in a rural village, so online is cheaper than driving 25 to 50 miles to a store." cwsjr2323

lottery, lotto, lottery ticket, scratch off, scratch offsAnimation Scratch Off GIFGiphy

"Lottery tickets." evissamnoisis

"Hair color. I’ve embraced the gray!" phishinfordory

"I’ll add sandwich bread. I started making my own. It costs just over $1 for me to make a small loaf that’s just enough for the 2 of us for a week. Plus no additives or preservatives." BeerWench13TheOrig

"Books. I go to the library." Significant-Emu1855

library, library card, library book, books, readingDog Glasses GIF by County of Los AngelesGiphy

"Broth. Have an ongoing 'broth bag' going in the freezer. Once I run out of frozen broth cubes, I make another round." Colorfulplaid123

"New clothes from shops! I'm now a charity shop and Vinted gal, my clothes are so much better quality and I spend less." CorinaPhoto

"Bidet toilet seat is cheap, easy to install, much easier and faster to use, and most importantly will keep you far cleaner while not wasting any toilet paper." hopopo

"Menstrual products. Bought a menstrual cup back in 2016 and have not looked back." simply-misc

"Chip clips. I buy cheap old wooden clothespins! Works great and if they break, no biggie. It’s $2 for 24. I also use clear shower caps for dishes I have no lids for or it’s something that can’t have a lid, like deviled eggs. I use the shower caps. Much cheaper than those bowl covers they sell 8-12 in a pack for $1.25. Those bowl covers are kind of pricey and you get 1 large and 2 mediums and a bunch of tiny ones!!" Florida1974

alcohol, quit alcohol, drinks, pour out, drinkingPour One Out Malt Liquor GIFGiphy

"Alcohol." Fit_Artichoke_523

"Baked beans in the can, I literally keep everything on hand to make it so it was an excess purchase. Instant rice packs, I make regular rice, 20 minutes is not that long 😆 We keep getting gifted napkins but we don’t purchase them." Miss_Pouncealot

"Soap in a pump bottle. Switched to bars (Costco). So much value, less trash and plastic, and a better experience. Why did we invent pump bottle soap??" thebiglebowskiisfine



Culture

Instead of buying a home, 22-year-old spends life savings on a chunk of raw Colombian jungle

Why fight traffic when you can live with the monkey and harvest avocados?

Canva Photos

A 22-year-old spent his life savings not on a house, but on a jungle.

There comes a time in every young person's life where you find yourself facing down the path laid out for you. All the things you're "supposed" to do: get a college education, land a good job, make enough money so you can save up and eventually reach the mountaintop of buying your own home.

The problem is that settling down and buying property has become ridiculously, ludicrously out of reach for a lot of young people. Price-to-income ratios are the highest they've ever been in the history of the United States, and many of the new generation of adults who have achieved the dream of owning their own home have found it to be... a trap! Yes, there are a lot of amazing benefits to being a homeowner, but it can also be a massive drain on your finances, your time, and your freedom.

One Gen Z man is documenting his attempt at doing things a little differently. Instead of investing in his first house, he spent his life savings on 7.5 acres of undeveloped jungle in Colombia.

Twenty-two year old Robert Lennox-Hvenekilde from Denmark has always been an adventurer. He's been filming his outdoorsy-escapades on TikTok for years. But a recent trip to Colombia left the Gen Z-er inspired to take his interest in nature to the next level.

"[I] realized that there were a lot of people living in these areas of the world who were maybe not rich in an economic sense, but they just seemed extremely free and to have an extremely high quality of life," he told Newsweek.

He decided to do something a lot of people only dream or fantasize about: he wanted to live in Colombia, among nature, and create a sustainable homestead for himself. So, after months of researching, networking, and negotiations, he was able to purchase three hectares of undeveloped land for about $40,000. That equates to roughly five or six football fields, for reference.

The jungle land Lennox-Hvenekilde now calls home features a fresh water stream, avocado and other fruit trees, and sugar cane.

He's currently building a small structure on the land to live in, and he plans to be a good caretaker of the land. Outside of harvesting fruit and avocado to eat and sell, he says he'll continue to plant and nurture native plant species to provide a habitat for the several species of endangered monkeys living there. Lennox-Hvenekilde also says his property came with special trees planted specifically for wood production, which he's using to create his dwelling.

"I would not cut down any of the native jungle," he says.

Watch him give an amazing tour of his new home here:

@roba_tron

Property break down #4you #foru #danmark #wildlife #nature #dk #offgrid

Nearly two million people were fascinated by the wild video. Many were inspired by a way of life they'd previously thought completely unattainable.

"Dream life"

"can i come join you... sounds amazing"

"Bro made the best decision of his live"

It looks incredible on camera: the vibrant greens of the rainforest, working with your hands instead of staring at a computer all day, never having to commute or deal with rude strangers out in public. Where do I sign up!?

Still, others had mixed feelings:

"Please take care of the land and his water. Is our job to protect our nature. Plant trees and native flowers," one user implored.

More than a few commenters were uncomfortable with an outsider buying up endangered jungle land in a foreign country, likening it to gentrification.

Lennox-Hvenekilde's response has been that it's better for someone like him to take a small piece of the land for living, and harvest and care for the rest. In comparison, mass farmers burn down hundreds of thousands of acres of rainforest every single year in Colombia to make room for their crops. In comparison, the 22-year-old's impact will be extremely minimal.

@roba_tron

Project Property #4you #foru #wildlife #nature #offgrid #cabin #adventure #danmark #dk

We've all had the fantasy at one time or another. Disappear, leave our entire life and Earthly possessions behind, and flee deep into nature. Live off the land. Create a simpler life for ourselves. Be happy.

In fact, interest in off-grid living has been steadily growing in popularity due to factors like rising costs, fierce political division, and an increasingly hectic and stressful modern lifestyle.

For most of us, though, the thought remains a fantasy. As appealing as it sounds, the idea of actually saying goodbye to our career, friends, family, and human pleasures is a little frightening. Worse is when we realize that living off the grid is a ridiculous amount of work. Sourcing our own food and fresh water? Having little to no access to medical care if we were to get injured or sick?

@roba_tron

Day 36 #4you #foru #wildlife #nature #offgrid #cabin #danmark

It took a lot of bravery for Lennox-Hvenekilde to take such a big leap the way he did. But his journey is not without its dangers. His viewers worry he might have run ins with the infamous Colombian drug cartels, which operate in the rainforest growing coca, which is used to make cocaine. And then there are all the bears, jaguars, and creepy crawlies.

"But how are the spiders?" one commenter asked Lennox-Hvenekilde. "Big," he said.

Yeah, on second thought, maybe that commute doesn't sound quite so bad.

Art

It took 14 years and 380 global embroiders to make one stunningly meaningful dress

A truly multicultural art project with style touches from 51 different countries.

Photos courtesy of The Red Dress project
Embroiderer Lekazia Turner wearing The Red Dress.

Few things bring people together more beautifully than art. Whether it's music, sculpture, paint or fabric, the arts are a way for us to express ourselves, our cultures and our common humanity. But rarely do we witness one singular piece of art truly encapsulating the creativity of our human family.

At first glance, the dress created for the Red Dress project is quite obviously stunning. It looks as though it could be worn by a royal—though a royal from where? The style, colors and patterns of the dress don't shout any particular country or culture; in fact, we can point to different elements of it and say it looks like it belongs on any continent.

There's a reason for that. The dress is made out of 84 pieces of burgundy silk dupion, which spent 14 years being sent around the world to be embroidered by 380 people from 51 countries—a truly global, multicultural creation.

Of those 380 embroiderers, about a third were commissioned artisans who were paid for their work and receive a portion of all ongoing exhibition fees. The rest were volunteers who contributed their stitches at events in various countries. Approximately 97% of the embroiderers were female.

British textile artist Kirstie Macleod conceived the project in 2009 as "an investigation into identity, with a desire to connect with women from the around without borders and boundaries." The basic design started as a sketch on the back of a napkin and has grown into a tangible garment that is not only a gorgeous work of art but a platform for women around the world and from all walks of life to express themselves and have their voices heard.

As shared on the project's website:

"Embroiderers include female refugees from Palestine and Syria, women seeking asylum in the UK from Iraq, China, Nigeria and Namibia, victims of war in Kosovo, Rwanda, and DR Congo; impoverished women in South Africa, Mexico, and Egypt; individuals in Kenya, Japan, Turkey, Sweden, Peru, Czech Republic, Dubai, Afghanistan, Australia, Argentina, Switzerland, Canada, Tobago, Vietnam, Estonia, USA, Russia, Pakistan, Wales, Colombia and England, students from Montenegro, Brazil, Malta, Singapore, Eritrea, Norway, Poland, Finland, Ireland, Romania and Hong Kong as well as upmarket embroidery studios in India and Saudi Arabia."

On Instagram, Kirstie Macleod shared a panel of the dress that was embroidered by two women in Kosovo, who shared some of their reflections on their experiences in the war there.

They stitched words into the birds they embroidered:

"Better one winter in your own country than a hundred springs away."

"The greatest wealth is to live content with little."

"Freedom has come. Love yourself first."

"Love all. Trust some. Hate none."

"A winter is a winter. Be nice, everyone."

"We live in peace now."

The creation of the dress began in 2009 and was completed in 2023. Each woman embroidered a piece of her own story into the dress, which contains millions of stitches. From established professional artisans to first-time embroiderers, the women were encouraged to share something that expressed their personal identities as well as their cultures. Some used traditional embroidery styles that had been practiced for hundreds of years where they are from. Others stitched in meaningful elements of their life stories. Some of the women are also using textile work to rebuild their lives and earn a consistent living.

The dress is on tour, being displayed in museums and galleries around the world. The photos showing women of various ages and ethnicities wearing the dress are made all the more moving knowing the history of how and by whom it was made.

In May 2025, a book detailing the dress's creation and journey around the world was published and can be found here.

Absolutely stunning. What a wonderful idea to connect women in a way that lets them share their stories and showcases and beautifully honors them.

This article first appeared three years ago and has been updated.

Pop Culture

Man's dating advice to find the guy who will 'guide you through death' is striking a chord

"Yeah, muscles are cool, but can he sit in the hospital for six hours?"

This is a real life partner litmus test.

We all know that dating can be confusing, disappointing, and...all things opposite of romantic, essentially. That goes especially when we conflate trivial preferences (you know, 6’5”, blue eyes, finance type stuff) with traits that actually align with our values. In other words, when we forget that the criteria for a fling differs from that of a life partner.

As for finding the former, a man named Davi has some pretty solid advice. While it’s geared towards women who are seeking husbands, you can easily apply this PSA to anyone looking for long-term love. The reasons will be pretty obvious, though fairly macabre.

“Your husband will literally have to guide you through the death of both of your parents, so choose that man wisely,” Davi begins in a clip posted to TikTok. “Like, yeah, muscles are cool, but can he sit with you in a hospital waiting room for six hours without making it about his fantasy football team?”

dating, dating advice, relationships, relationship advice, finding the right guy, life partner, grief, green flags"Yeah, muscles are cool, but can he sit with you in a hospital waiting room for six hours without making it about his fantasy football team?”Photo credit: Canva

The “real test,” Davi argued, isn’t based on aesthetics, but on whether or not you can “trust them to talk to your dad’s doctor when you’re too overwhelmed to do it yourself…and help you through it.”

He even noted that while positive communication, like sending “good morning texts,” and cutesy novel things like “matching Halloween costumes” are still important, they are trumped by how a partner is able to help you during grief.

“It’s, ‘Hey I called the funeral home so you didn’t have to do it. That’s trustworthy. That’s a quality to look for.”

Keeping this question in mind can help you “start figuring out what really matters” and “being picky about the right things,” Davi says, rather than being distracted by what someone looks like. Of course, physical attraction has its place, but as we know, that is the most superficial and changeable quality of a person, and therefore not always the best way to determine a true life partner.

Davi then brought it home with a warning, saying, “One day, life is gonna body slam you with grief, I promise you. And the guy who only brings vibes is gonna fold like a lawn chair.”

dating, dating advice, relationships, relationship advice, finding the right guy, life partner, grief, green flags“One day, life is gonna body slam you with grief."Photo credit: Canva

Again, this can apply to anyone, but it certainly touches on a common dilemma that many women have lamented about male partners who don’t pull their own weight during challenging circumstances. While they are often referring to childcare, this brings a whole new layer to consider.

“If you find a man who can hold you up when you’re going through it, hold onto that for dear life. Because love isn’t built on butterflies and your little checklist. It’s built on the guy who brings snacks, tissues, and doesn’t flinch when the hard stuff shows up.” Davi concluded.

The video, which has racked up nearly five million views, has certainly struck a chord, and has been met with an overwhelmingly positive response—from people who noted that it "changed their brain chemistry” to women who shared gratitude for having this kind of partner in their lives.


“OMG I NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT THIS”

“Excellent advice! This man is going to be your emergency contact.”

“Fall in love with how he treats you, not the muscles.”

“My husband was my rock through the loss of my parents, sister, and our son. Yes. Pick the right man.”

“My dad just passed away and he was there EVERY step of the way. I am so thankful for him and happy to endure all of life’s challenges with him.”

Yes, it's a bleak and uncomfortable scenario that no one relishes having to think about, and certainly not on anyone’s top of mind when it comes to romance, but nonetheless, grief is a big part of life. It’s something none of us want to endure alone. The right partner can make those difficult moments a little easier to navigate, so, as Davi rightfully prompted, choose wisely.

Canva

A young person's hand sticks up from the water.

At first, it seemed like any regular sunny day in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida. An apartment complex security camera captured the sun shining over the wispy palm trees. A six-year-old boy named Oscar was on vacation with his family and was lounging on an inflatable raft in a pool. Unsteady, however, he slips off the raft into the water, and frighteningly—he can't swim.

His cousin, standing at the edge of the pool, also can't swim, and luckily had the foresight to not jump in after him. Two people who can't swim is definitely worse than one. Panicked, Oscar flails and slips under, while his cousin screams for help. It was terrifying. He tries to push the raft over to Oscar, yelling, "Oscar, grab it!" But he can't.

At the same time, Roque Ivan Ocampo Calderon, who was doing maintenance on the property, happened to hear the screams. In the video, he runs out with absolutely no hesitation, takes his shoes off, and jumps in. He quickly gathers Oscar in his arms and swims him to safety, though he needed the cousin's help to lift him out of the pool. But here's the kicker: Calderon admitted he wasn't a very good swimmer either.

What happened next was a masterclass in first-aid: Ivan begins administering CPR and, quite possibly, according to news reports, saved Oscar's life.

At this point, people nearby began to gather to see how they can help. Oscar's mom had been notified and soon she can be seen frantically running to the scene as any mother would. Police and EMTs arrive, but Oscar is not out of the woods. As shown on Inside Edition, a police officer asks how long Oscar was in the water, and Calderon answers, "Maybe two minutes." He's taken to the hospital and, after two days, was able to return home, a healthy boy.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

As reported by Yahoo News, in a news press conference, Calderon relays, "I started doing CPR. The kid wasn’t breathing, but I kept doing it and doing it until he started breathing again."

The ample news coverage of the story spawned many articles and reports under many of which commenters are hailing Calderon a true hero. Quite a few are also moved by how relatable this scary moment is—not only to the viewer, or any parents out there, but also to the journalists. One notes (referring to Inside Edition), "I've never seen an anchor get emotional like that, She was almost crying."

Another gives a note that could be helpful should someone else encounter someone drowning: "He took his shoes off first. Always take off your shoes—they can collect water and inhibit you from creating a surface to push off underwater. Even advanced swimmers can have difficulty swimming with shoes on, let alone saving someone else too."

pool, swimming, safety, water, heroA picture of a swimming pool. Photo by Wesley Tingey on Unsplash

And one reminds us that, despite the judgment some seemed to impose in the comments, this could happen to anyone. "I vividly remember being 7 years old and jumping into the deep end, not knowing how to swim. Thankfully, someone was there to save me… Learning to swim is a life skill that every child should have the chance to develop early. It can make all the difference."