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A school replaced detention with meditation. The results are stunning.

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A school replaced detention with meditation. The results are stunning.

This article originally appeared on 09.22.16


Imagine you're working at a school and one of the kids is starting to act up. What do you do?

Traditionally, the answer would be to give the unruly kid detention or suspension.

But in my memory, detention tended to involve staring at walls, bored out of my mind, trying to either surreptitiously talk to the kids around me without getting caught or trying to read a book. If it was designed to make me think about my actions, it didn't really work. It just made everything feel stupid and unfair.


But Robert W. Coleman Elementary School has been doing something different when students act out: offering meditation.


Photo from Holistic Life Foundation, used with permission.

Instead of punishing disruptive kids or sending them to the principal's office, the Baltimore school has something called the Mindful Moment Room instead.

The room looks nothing like your standard windowless detention room. Instead, it's filled with lamps, decorations, and plush purple pillows. Misbehaving kids are encouraged to sit in the room and go through practices like breathing or meditation, helping them calm down and re-center. They are also asked to talk through what happened.

Meditation and mindfulness are pretty interesting, scientifically.

children meditation

A child meditates

Photo from Holistic Life Foundation, used with permission.

Mindful meditation has been around in some form or another for thousands of years. Recently, though, science has started looking at its effects on our minds and bodies, and it's finding some interesting effects.

One study, for example, suggested that mindful meditation could give practicing soldiers a kind of mental armor against disruptive emotions, and it can improve memory too. Another suggested mindful meditation could improve a person's attention span and focus.

Individual studies should be taken with a grain of salt (results don't always carry in every single situation), but overall, science is starting to build up a really interesting picture of how awesome meditation can be. Mindfulness in particular has even become part of certain fairly successful psychotherapies.

children yoga

After-school yoga.

Photo from Holistic Life Foundation, used with permission.

Back at the school, the Mindful Moment Room isn't the only way Robert W. Coleman Elementary has been encouraging its kids.

The meditation room was created as a partnership with the Holistic Life Foundation, a local nonprofit that runs other programs as well. For more than 10 years the foundation has been offering the after-school program Holistic Me, where kids from pre-K through the fifth grade practice mindfulness exercises and yoga.

"It's amazing," said Kirk Philips, the Holistic Me coordinator at Robert W. Coleman. "You wouldn't think that little kids would meditate in silence. And they do."

kids meditating

A child meditates at the Holistic Life Foundation

Photo from Holistic Life Foundation, used with permission.

There was a Christmas party, for example, where the kids knew they were going to get presents but were still expected to do meditation first."As a little kid, that's got to be hard to sit down and meditate when you know you're about to get a bag of gifts, and they did it! It was beautiful, we were all smiling at each other watching them," said Philips.

The kids may even be bringing that mindfulness back home with them. In the August 2016 issue of Oprah Magazine, Holistic Life Foundation co-founder Andres Gonzalez said: "We've had parents tell us, 'I came home the other day stressed out, and my daughter said, "Hey, Mom, you need to sit down. I need to teach you how to breathe.'"

The program also helps mentor and tutor the kids, as well as teach them about the environment.

volunteer work

Building a vegetable garden.

Photo from Holistic Life Foundation, used with permission.

They help clean up local parks, build gardens, and visit nearby farms. Philips said they even teach kids to be co-teachers, letting them run the yoga sessions.

This isn't just happening at one school, either. Lots of schools are trying this kind of holistic thinking, and it's producing incredible results.

In the U.K., for example, the Mindfulness in Schools Project is teaching adults how to set up programs. Mindful Schools, another nonprofit, is helping to set up similar programs in the United States.

Oh, and by the way, the schools are seeing a tangible benefit from this program, too.

Philips said that at Robert W. Coleman Elementary, there have been exactly zero suspensions last year and so far this year. Meanwhile, nearby Patterson Park High School, which also uses the mindfulness programs, said suspension rates dropped and attendance increased as well.

Is that wholly from the mindfulness practices? It's impossible to say, but those are pretty remarkable numbers, all the same.

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"If you must die, try to do it in the arms of someone who loves you," he wrote. "It helps."

He described how they met on September 30, 1994. "I walked into Café Aroma in Studio City, and there she was," he wrote. "She had it all—beauty, style, grace, intelligence, wit, a great laugh, a blinding smile and (can I say this in 2023?) legs that demanded to be shown off, and were."

He said he wrote in his journal that night, "I think I may be in big trouble." Thus began their 28-year-long relationship that included a 25-year marriage.

"She was remarkably low maintenance," he continued. "We both appreciated the occasional meal in a fine restaurant and traveling abroad, but some years I'd ask what she wanted for her birthday and she would answer, 'a grilled cheese sandwich.' Typical. She was generous to a fault, always putting others' needs before her own."

Weide shared that his wife had a particular "soft spot" for animals in need. "Our own animals were all rescues, and friends would tell her, 'If I can come back in another life, I want to be one of your animals.'" he wrote.

Linda was an actress and Weide shared some of her most memorable roles, but it's clear her role as the leading lady in his life meant the most to him.

"What a team we made," Weide wrote. "She was Gracie to my George. After we purchased side-by-side cemetery plots years ago, I asked her what she wanted her marker to say. She answered, 'I'm with Stupid.' (That request will not be honored.) Oh dear—what am I ever supposed to do without her?"

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"They say, 'Nothing lasts forever,' but they didn't know about my love for her," he wrote. "28 years wasn't nearly long enough. Still, I may just be the luckiest SOB who ever lived. Rest well, Bunnie. I hope we'll be together again."

And finally, the perfect last line:

"For those who never knew her, I'm sorry for your loss."

Weide has been "surprised and a bit overwhelmed" by how people have responded to the obituary, but he's thrilled that so many people are getting a glimpse of

"I love that total strangers are confessing to tears and saying they can tell what a beautiful person Linda was. The fact that so many are getting a small taste of what I blessed with for 28 years is so moving," he wrote on Twitter. "Many of the comments have made me cry, some make me laugh...Others make me shout, 'Yes, yes!'"

"Anyway, my deepest appreciation to everyone who's taken the time to read or ❤️ or comment on the tribute," he continued. "You have made this new widower feel a little less lonely. And I know Linda sends her love, too.”

Thank you, Bob Weide, for sharing your love story with the world. It seems you were right—we all would have loved Linda.

Read Weide's obituary in full here. And if this story compels you to do something to honor Linda's life, Weide suggests making a donation to Best Friends Animal Sanctuary, her favorite animal shelter.


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