The 'weirdest family role' is disappearing in the U.S. Here's the change no one mentions.
Family trees are rapidly changing.
Four cousins hanging out in the yard.
The birth rate in the U.S. has steadily declined since the Great Recession. Between 2007 and 2023, it has decreased by nearly 23%. In 1950, the average American woman had 3 children. Now, she has only 1.6, which is drastically lower than the replacement rate of 2.1.
The dropping birthrate has many worried that it will upend government programs because there won’t be enough young people to work and pay taxes to support older people on Social Security and Medicare.
Faith Hill from The Atlantic recently illustrated another problem with the declining birthrate in the U.S. and Europe that no one talks about: the decline of cousins.
“If everyone hypothetically went from having five kids to having four kids, that would mean one less sibling for each child,” Hill wrote, quoting demographer Sha Jiang. “But it would yield a much bigger decrease in first cousins: Instead of a child having four aunts or uncles who each have five kids—20 cousins—they would have three aunts or uncles who each have four kids, for a total of 12.”
Further, only about 6% of adult cousins live in the same U.S. census tract. The rest are about 237 miles apart.
TikToker Miriam Tinney, who curates interesting stories she finds online, shared the news in a video that has over 3.7 million views.
What do you think?
@miriam_tinny What do you think? #family #cousins #relationships #siblings #theatlantic
Psychologists believe cousins play an essential role in families because even though they are relations, the emotional bonds with them may not be as tight. "Cousins, extended family, allow psychological distance that immediate family cannot," relationship therapist Larry Shushansky told The Chicago Tribune. "Relationships with cousins afford a certain space, a certain independence, that allows us to have different kinds of experiences with them.”
"They can be a source of balance … affording the closeness and common bond that exists in families, as well as the psychological distance that is one step removed from the dependency that causes anxiety and conflict within immediate [family members],” Shushansky continued.
This unique position in the family allows cousins to take on various roles. Your cousin can be a mentor, friend, acquaintance, partner in crime at family functions or someone who helps you understand your extended family.
A cousin may not be the family member who lends you a kidney, but they can be the person who helps you mend fences with a sibling or allows you to cut loose at a family gathering because neither of you fears the other's judgment.
"Without cousins, who will my kids go smoke with on the cousin walk at Thanksgiving?" Rebeccaversonx commented on Tinny's video. "I’m ethnic sooooooo cousins are basically another set of siblings," Viv added.
"I don't think they surveyed POC because cousins in non-white families are usually super close," Britty added.
Given that cousins can have a significant role in our lives, Hill is right to lament the loss of the important, if not necessarily vital, relationship.
“A cousin-sparse future, then, could be a greater loss than people might recognize,” Hill wrote. “It might also make the relationship that much more important: With fewer of them around, cousins may need to depend on one another even more. Families are shrinking—but that doesn’t mean they need to come apart.”
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An Irish woman went to the doctor for a routine eye exam. She left with bright neon green eyes.
It's not easy seeing green.
Did she get superpowers?
Going to the eye doctor can be a hassle and a pain. It's not just the routine issues and inconveniences that come along when making a doctor appointment, but sometimes the various devices being used to check your eyes' health feel invasive and uncomfortable. But at least at the end of the appointment, most of us don't look like we're turning into The Incredible Hulk. That wasn't the case for one Irish woman.
Photographer Margerita B. Wargola was just going in for a routine eye exam at the hospital but ended up leaving with her eyes a shocking, bright neon green.
At the doctor's office, the nurse practitioner was prepping Wargola for a test with a machine that Wargola had experienced before. Before the test started, Wargola presumed the nurse had dropped some saline into her eyes, as they were feeling dry. After she blinked, everything went yellow.
Wargola and the nurse initially panicked. Neither knew what was going on as Wargola suddenly had yellow vision and radioactive-looking green eyes. After the initial shock, both realized the issue: the nurse forgot to ask Wargola to remove her contact lenses before putting contrast drops in her eyes for the exam. Wargola and the nurse quickly removed the lenses from her eyes and washed them thoroughly with saline. Fortunately, Wargola's eyes were unharmed. Unfortunately, her contacts were permanently stained and she didn't bring a spare pair.
- YouTube youtube.com
Since she has poor vision, Wargola was forced to drive herself home after the eye exam wearing the neon-green contact lenses that make her look like a member of the Green Lantern Corps. She couldn't help but laugh at her predicament and recorded a video explaining it all on social media. Since then, her video has sparked a couple Reddit threads and collected a bunch of comments on Instagram:
“But the REAL question is: do you now have X-Ray vision?”
“You can just say you're a superhero.”
“I would make a few stops on the way home just to freak some people out!”
“I would have lived it up! Grab a coffee, do grocery shopping, walk around a shopping center.”
“This one would pair well with that girl who ate something with turmeric with her invisalign on and walked around Paris smiling at people with seemingly BRIGHT YELLOW TEETH.”
“I would save those for fancy special occasions! WOW!”
“Every time I'd stop I'd turn slowly and stare at the person in the car next to me.”
“Keep them. Tell people what to do. They’ll do your bidding.”
In a follow-up Instagram video, Wargola showed her followers that she was safe at home with normal eyes, showing that the damaged contact lenses were so stained that they turned the saline solution in her contacts case into a bright Gatorade yellow. She wasn't mad at the nurse and, in fact, plans on keeping the lenses to wear on St. Patrick's Day or some other special occasion.
While no harm was done and a good laugh was had, it's still best for doctors, nurses, and patients alike to double-check and ask or tell if contact lenses are being worn before each eye test. If not, there might be more than ultra-green eyes to worry about.