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It's easy to be duped by online hoaxes — so we spoke with an expert at spotting fake news.

Being able to tell truth from lies is more important than ever.

fake news, experts, social media, fact checking
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It's getting harder and harder to tell.

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"Fake news" is more than just the phrase the president uses to brush aside stories he doesn't like. It's a real thing, and something we should all be on the lookout for.

Below is an image of Parkland student Emma González tearing up a copy of the U.S. Constitution that went viral in 2018, sending some corners of social media into a frenzy.


There was one problem, however: It was totally fake.

The actual photo came from a Teen Vogue video shoot featuring her and some of the other Parkland students. In the real clip, González is seen tearing up a paper shooting target.

fake news, Teen Vogue, gun rights, activism

Teen Vogue photo shoot goes viral.

linked image from snopes.com

The fact-check was swift, but a lot of damage was done, as the altered image continued making the rounds.

It's easy to be duped by online hoaxes — so we spoke with someone whose job it was to spot them every day.

At the time of this incident, managing editor Brooke Binkowski wrestled with the importance of truth and figuring out how to stop the spread of hoaxes every day for the highly trusted fact-checking website Snopes.

fact checking, fake news, urban legends, story, news topics

Snopes fact checks urban legends.

www.snopes.com

The site, launched in 1994, began as a collection of fact-checks on some of the internet's early urban legends. Wanted to find out whether or not that story about the killer with a hook for a hand was true? Snopes had you covered. Needed to know whether your favorite brand of bubble gum is filled with spider eggs? The answer was just one click away.

As the site evolved its taken on more serious topics, online hoaxes, and "fake news." Did Donald Trump wade into the waters of a flooded Texas city to save two cats from drowning after Hurricane Harvey? (No.) Did Barack Obama congratulate Vladimir Putin on his 2012 electoral victory? (Yes.)

Snopes is often cited alongside FactCheck.org and PolitiFact as some of the best, most accurate, and bias-free fact-checking websites in the world, even earning it a partnership with Facebook.

Binkowski spoke with Upworthy about how to deal with increasingly sophisticated hoaxes we all encounter online (and gave us a few behind-the-scenes secrets about how the people at Snopes do what they do best).

The following interview has been lightly edited and condensed for clarity.

Why does the truth matter, and what harm is there in sharing fake stories?

The truth matters because without being able to agree on the most basic facts, there is no democracy. Democracy depends on an informed, educated populace in order to survive. To actively suppress curiosity or obscure facts is to actively suppress democratic norms.

When you share fake or misleading stories, first of all, don't beat yourself up about it if you were trying not to! We all fall for it. Some of it is extremely convincing.

I strongly believe that the onus should not be on the individual to sift through all the garbage to find good, vetted news on top of every other thing they have going on in their life, as I hear many suggest — that's why journalism exists. I think people are overall extremely smart and crave information, but without vetted and transparent information, they fall for conspiracy theorizing.

That's what propaganda and disinformation seize on. If you repeat that pattern across a country, it dramatically erodes these democratic norms. Plus, have you ever tried to talk to a really entrenched conspiracy theorist?

So I would be as mindful as you can about the sources of stories and try your best not to share disinformation — and if you do, I would try to be upfront about it and delete it so that it does not spread.

Right now is a crucial time to be mindful, even though I just said the onus shouldn't be on the individual. It shouldn't, but we simply don't have enough working journalists to go around right now, because our industry has been allowed to collapse in the name of executive profit.

Can you walk us through how Snopes fact-checks a story?

We don't have any one specific way that we fact-check a story — there's no real formula for doing so. A lot of what we do is so disappointing when I describe it to people, because it's not magic. It's "just" journalism.

I try to give my writers time and space to do the research that they need to do, although sometimes it's a little difficult when we have "conspiracizing" from all sides. So sometimes, one of us will have to head to the library to pull books or go over to the local university to look through papers on campus.

A lot of the time we do old-fashioned reporting. Our staff is all over the United States and they know their stuff, so I'll take advantage of that and send them out on the field sometimes. We also, of course, know the repeat fake-news and satire offenders, so that makes it easy, because we can save a lot of time just by noting that they have an all-purpose disclaimer buried somewhere on their site. Sometimes we do photo or video forensics and FOIA requests (not that we get a lot of those answered, hahaha).


We try to be as thorough and as transparent with our work as possible, which is why we have a source list at the bottom of each page and maybe describe our methodology in a bit more detail than we should — but that's how we all roll.

Which is also why, on a side note, I find the conspiracy theories about us a bit puzzling. We're really easy to track down online, we list all our sources, and we try to be as open as humanly possible without also being boring about our methodology.

And yet people still think we're part of a grand conspiracy. I'm still waiting for my check from George Soros/the Lizard People/the Clinton Foundation, though. It's been, like, 20 years!

...OK, if you're a conspiracy theorist reading that last sentence, that's a joke. I already got my checks.

No, no, I'm sorry. I just can't stop myself.

Photo via Teen Vogue, illustration by Tatiana Cardenas/Upworthy.

What can regular, everyday people do to avoid hoaxes and "fake news?"

My best tip that I can possible give readers is this: Disinformation and propaganda classically take hold by using emotional appeals. That is why what Cambridge Analytica did should be viewed through that lens.

One of the more sinister things that I have read that they did, in my opinion (among other things I'm sure that no one yet knows), was track people who were highly susceptible to authoritarianism, then flood them with violent imagery that was invisible to everyone else on social media, so that they were always in a state of fear and emotional arousal and highly susceptible to an authoritarian message.

That's the type of person propaganda historically targets anyway — those who feel out of step with society and have strong tendencies toward authoritarianism — but now, groups like Cambridge Analytica are doing it faster and more surgically.

If you're reading, viewing, or listening to a story that's flooding you with high emotion, negative or positive — whether it's fear, rage, schadenfreude, amusement at how gullible everyone else is — check your sources. You are being played. Do a quick search for the story, see if it has been debunked at minimum, and/or look for other sources and perspectives.

One of the most noxious things about disinformation and propaganda is that both weave some truth into their lies, which makes the lies much, much stronger.

Something I like to say about political leanings is that the right assumes it has the moral upper hand and the left assumes it has the intellectual upper hand — both are tremendous weaknesses that are easy to exploit.

Don't let yourself be exploited. Be on guard. Don't assume other people are sheep and don't assume other people are morally bankrupt. Propaganda wants you to assume the worst about your fellow denizens; the people who push it out want the basic fabric of society destroyed.

It wants you hating your lovers, your neighbors, your family members, the guy at the store, the lady at the coffee shop. Propagandists want you distrusting each other, bickering, and unable to agree on the most basic facts — because then they can exploit those cracks further and consolidate power in the process.

Don't let yourself be taken in.

The basic take-aways for the average person? Get your news from trusted sources, confirm it with a second source, check your own confirmation biases, and get familiar with reverse image search tools.

This story originally appeared on 03.30.18

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5 small things that made us smile this week

Your weekly cheat sheet to the best of the Internet

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Life can be bleak, so we’re going to be celebrating the small joys while we can—whether that’s a sweet snack that boosts your mood (courtesy of our friends at All In), or a spontaneous moment between strangers that's so joyful it restores your faith in the algorithm (even if only for a second). These momentary mood boosters are everywhere you look—you just have to be able to find them underneath all the noise. And that’s where we come in.

Consider this weekly web series your cheat sheet to the best of the Internet—not just random memes to make you laugh, but examples of people truly finding something extraordinary in the mundane. Each Friday we'll be delivering five pieces of media that allow you to stop for a second, take a breath, and feel just a little bit brighter among the daily stress. (Think of us as your chronically online bestie who knows exactly how to make you smile, exactly when you need it the most.)

Ready to smile? Here we go.

1. The best travel buddy surprise 

 
 @tarareynolds03 

Surprising Grandson with going on vacation with him.

 ♬ original sound - Tara Leanne Reynolds 
 
  This sweet grandson thought he was just heading out on vacation—until he spotted a very familiar face at the airport. The moment he sees Grandma standing there, his jaw literally drops. He sets his backpack down and then runs straight into her arms for the biggest hug. "Oh my God! You're coming with us to Jamaica, right?!" he asks her, already smiling from ear to ear. It's the kind of unscripted joy that makes you want to call your own grandma to say hi—and other TikTokers are having all the feels in the comments section: "This brought me to tears," says user KE. "I would kill to go on another vacation with my grandma again. She passed in February. Take so many pictures!"

2. Saying 'thank you' to a very special teacher 

Last week, we shared a question on Upworthy’s Instagram that sparked an outpouring of heartfelt responses:
 “If you could say thank you to one person right now, who would it be, and why?”

For Kate Delisle, a teacher in North Andover, Massachusetts, the answer came instantly: her longtime colleague and teaching assistant, Jeanne Donovan.

“Jeanne has been by my side for seventeen years,” Kate shared. “Next year, we’ll have to split our program — and we won’t be working together anymore.” In her message, Kate described Jeanne as more than just a coworker. She’s supportive, empathetic, and “my right arm — someone who lights up every room she enters. I’m privileged to know her and consider her family.”

To celebrate that incredible bond, our friends at All In recently paid a surprise visit to Kate and Jeanne at their school — letting Jeanne know just how deeply appreciated she is by her colleagues and students alike. And get this: Jeanne is *so* beloved that Kate's parents, kids, sister, and husband all came to the surprise to honor her alongside everyone else. A true tear-jerker and a must-watch.

3. The proudest big brother

 
 @caylaleighbrown This is the original video, He also said it looks like Mike Wazowski after we got done crying LOL #fyp #infertility #infertilityjourney #twins #twinpregnancy #ultrasound #pregnancyafterinfertility #pregnancyannouncement #twinannouncement #twinsies #twinmom ♬ original sound - Cayla Brown ✨ WDW 
 
 

Grab your tissues for this one. After eight long years of hoping for another baby, TikTok user Cayla Lee Brown surprises her stepson Caleb with a sonogram photo—and his reaction is nothing short of beautiful. When Caleb realizes not only that he's going to be a big brother but that twin siblings are on the way, his eyes well up and he whispers "We're having twins?!" Cue the heart explosion. In a follow-up video, Cayla shares something that makes this news extra special: Caleb isn't actually her biological child, and although she considers Caleb her son she wasn't sure she'd be able to have biological children at all. "[Caleb] was my gift and I was blessed with two more," she explains. This video is the best reminder that love makes a family, and sometimes the best surprises take a little time.

4. Overly excited dogs 

 
 @puppylovestoplay6 Part23: When they hear a word they like#dog#funny#funnyanimals#funnypets#animals #dogsofttiktok #pet #foryou #longervideos#foryou#fyp #funnyvideo ♬ original sound - Puppylovestoplay 
 
 

This feel-good compilation is basically a highlight reel of dogs at their happiest: realizing they’re about to go on a walk. From excited tail wags to full-body zoomies, every pup in this video gives a masterclass in unfiltered enthusiasm. One especially clever owner even uses sign language to say “walk,” just to see if their dog picks up on it—and spoiler: the reaction is still pure chaos (the joyful kind). These dogs just know, and they are ready (read: unhinged.) Truly a reminder that the simplest things—in this case, some fresh air and a little adventure—are what spark the most joy.

5.Bunny ASMR

 
 @megancottone The way she munched down the carrot ribbon #bunnies ♬ Married Life (From "Up") - Gina Luciani 
 
 

If you've had a stressful day, allow this floofy little friend to press the reset button on your brain. TikTok creator @megancottone gives us a full 60 seconds of bunny bliss: one ridiculously adorable rabbit, some deliciously crunchy snacks, and the kind of soft background music that makes your heart rate drop in the best way. The gentle munching noises? Therapeutic. The fuzzy face and floppy ears? Instant joy. It’s like nature’s version of white noise—but cuter. Honestly, someone get this bunny a wellness podcast deal.

For even more “extra”-ordinary moments, come find us on social media (@upworthy) or on upworthy.com!

For scrumptious snacks that add an extra boost of joy to your day, be sure to check out All In. 

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Science

A sea lion hopped on a woman's boat to escape a group of killer whales and the footage is wild

What would you do if you were in the boat?

Screenshots via @castrowas95/Twitter

A seal escaping a killer whale attack.

In the Pacific Northwest, orca sightings are a fairly common occurrence. Still, tourists and locals alike marvel when a pod of "sea pandas" swims by, whipping out their phones to capture some of nature's most beautiful and intelligent creatures in their natural habitat. While orcas aren't a threat to humans, there's a reason they're called "killer whales." To their prey, which includes just about everything that swims except humans, they are terrifying apex predators who hunt in packs and will even coordinate to attack whales several times their own size.

So if you're a human alone on a little platform boat, and a sea lion that a group of orcas was eyeing for lunch jumps onto your boat, you might feel a little wary. Especially when those orcas don't just swim on by, but surround you head-on.

Watch exactly that scenario play out (language warning, if you've got wee ones you don't want f-bombed):


 

Ummm, yeah. An orca sighting is one thing, but this is a whole other story. Orcas have been known to knock large prey off of icebergs, so the whole "orcas don't hurt humans" thing doesn't feel super reassuring in this scenario.

The footage came from TikTok user @nutabull, whose now-deleted account stated she was from Vancouver Island.

The viral video sparked a debate about whether the sea lion should be kicked off the boat or not. The woman kept telling the sea lion it "had to go" with a frank "Sorry, buddy, that's life," message, though she never actively tried to push it off. Many commenters joked about yeeting the sea lion off the boat to avoid a potentially disastrous encounter with the orcas. Others were on #teamsealion, saying they wouldn't have the heart to boot the poor thing.

It's a big philosophical question. The philosophical underpinnings of the belief that humans should stay out of the matters of wild animals, so as not to interrupt the delicate balance of nature, is called "relational non-interventionism." The philosophy holds that we have no general obligation to alleviate animal suffering, and that we typically do not have special obligations to ease the suffering of wild animals. Therefore, we generally do not have a duty to intervene in nature to ease the suffering of wild animals. That's one thing to believe, but who wants to see animals suffer?


The reality is orcas eat sea lions—the circle of life and whatnot. Most of us just don't find ourselves in the middle of that circle, having to figure out whether the apex predators surrounding our boat are going to patiently wait for their lunch to come back or take it upon themselves to bump it back into the water.

Thankfully for the woman, the sea lion seemed to decide on its own that its options were limited and dove back in to take its chances with the orcas. But phew, that encounter would be harrowing for just about anyone.

Best of luck, sea lion. Hope you're an exceptional swimmer.

This article originally appeared four years ago.

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Science confirms ‘Move in Silence’ trend might be the smartest way to achieve your goals

“I promise you things always work out better when you keep them to yourself.”

TikTok: @wemiopakunle, @_alliechen, @mandanazarfhami,

Science confirms ‘Move in Silence’ trend might be the smartest way to achieve your goals.

TikTok's latest viral wisdom is backed by hard data—and it's making people rethink their communication habits. We live in a world of chronic oversharing. We post everything, from the routes we run (including screenshots as proof of all that hard work), to the pale-green iced matcha latte sitting at our desks or a present from a boyfriend (who will be tagged prominently, not secretly off screen). Who knows when, but our brains became wired for sharing: to record, to curate, and to post every second of our lives, then consume that of others to a disturbing degree. So, here's a radical idea: when it comes to goals and plans, try keeping them to yourself. It could be the key to making them a reality.

That's the message behind TikTok's massively popular "Move in Silence" trend, where creators like @noemoneyyy have cracked the contradictory code to success: Instead of broadcasting every big idea or project that runs through your head, if you actually want it to come to fruition, keep your plans to yourself until they're executed. And it's not just a trend; surprisingly, science also supports this muted approach.


 
 @noemoneyyy Work in private and let the results speak! #privatelife #privatelifehappylife #workinprivate #creatorsearchinsights ♬ sonido original - Luis Jonathan 
 
 

"As a former oversharer who used to tell every single friend, every single family member, or a partner everything I was doing, I promise you things always work out better when you keep them to yourself," explains creator @noemoneyyy in a video that's garnered millions of views.

On a different video by @mandanazarfhami, she says, “I don’t care what you’ve got going on in your life: that dream job, that city that you want to move to, that dream person, that dream life, that dream anything. Literally keep it to yourself until it’s done.”

Commentors were quick to agree, with one person writing: “From a young age, I never told anyone my next steps. I also taught my husband and son to keep our private matters to themselves and just do things 💯Not many people like it, but who cares🌝🙌🏼🫶🏼”

Another chimed in, “This concept has changed my life for the better.” Others replied, “100 agree 💕” and “100%🙌🏼people can’t ruin what is silent, show results.”


 
 @mandanazarghami monitoring spirits are a real thing - move in silence and watch how much your life changes #fypシ ♬ Jacob and the Stone - Emile Mosseri 
 
 


 

What's going on here

 

In a study done by New York University, researchers found that people who kept their goals private worked on tasks for an average of 45 minutes, compared to the 33 minutes of work completed by those who announced their plans in advance. The twist? The people who shared their goals expressed feeling closer to finishing, despite doing approximately 25% less work.

NYU psychologist Peter Gollwitzer, who led the research, concluded that "once you've told other people your intentions, it gives you a 'premature sense of completeness.'" He also found that the brain is made up of "identity symbols," which create one's self-image. Interestingly, both action and talking about action create symbols in your brain, so simply speaking about a future plan or something you want to do satisfies that part of your brain. When we make our goals public, especially ones that matter to us and deal with our identity, our ability to achieve said goal is significantly reduced. As the old adage goes, "actions speak louder than words."

Stranger still, in his paper "Does Social Reality Widen the Intention-Behavior Gap," Gollwitzer notes that in order for this phenomenon to happen, one must truly care about their goals. "Ironically, this effect was only found for participants who are very committed to their goal!" PsychologyToday notes. "The lesson learned is that the more passionate you are about your goals, the more secretive you should be about them."

 Quiet, silence, peace, shhh, no speaking, secret  The more passionate you are about your goals, the more secretive you should be. Photo credit: Canva

Another reason to keep quiet: If you're a beginner trying something new, sharing your plans could potentially open you up to criticism and negative feedback, which could deter you from even starting. At the University of Chicago, professor Ayelet Fishbach conducted studies to determine how positive and negative feedback affects the pursuit of one's goal. According to Atlassian, she and her team found:

 
     
  • When positive feedback signals commitment to a goal, it increases motivation.
    •  
  • When positive feedback signals progress, it actually decreases motivation.
    •  
 
"One example the researchers give is a math student who gets a good grade on a test. If she perceives it to mean she likes math, she will study harder. If, however, she sees the high score as a sign she is making progress in the class, she may ease up and study less." - Atlassian
 
 


 
 @_alliechen I used to be such an open book but now im a lot more reserved on my goals and plans so ppl dont judge #moveinsilence #relateablecontent #girlies #viral #success ♬ suara asli - astrooo🪐 
 
 

We've all been there: excitedly telling everyone about your grand plans to backpack through Europe, the year you'll finally learn Spanish, or joining the group lesson at the tennis courts you always pass by… only to mysteriously lose all motivation a week later. Turns out, those lovely dopamine bursts that accompany every enthusiastic "That sounds great!" or "You should totally do it!" response might be precisely what's holding you back.

The good news? You don't need to become closed-off and secretive, a hermit on the top of a mountain who's afraid to share any part of themselves with the world. Research suggests that sharing your goals with one or two selected friends who can be trusted to provide meaningful support is still a good idea. Just hold off on the Instagram Live announcement until you've actually accomplished something substantial.

So, the next time you sit down to write your goals, whether they be a new year's resolution, the day's to-do list, or a five-year plan, think twice about sharing it with others. Give it time and you might have something better to share soon: the results.

This article originally appeared in April.

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People who live alone share their 45 best money-saving hacks

"I fill empty glass jars with water and store them in my fridge. It costs more to cool an empty fridge than a full one."

Image via Canva

People living alone share their tips for saving money.

Whether you're single or choose to live alone, it can be expensive. Finding ways to save money living alone can take some creative thinking, but there are easy ways to put some extra cash back in your wallet.

In an online forum, member Just_Throw_Away_67 posed the question to fellow people who live alone: "What random cost-saving measures have you found that work well for those living alone?"

And single people and people living solo happily shared their money-saving hacks. These are 45 of the best ways to save money if you live alone.

 save money, saving money, money saving, make it rain, save money gif Make It Rain Coupons GIF  Giphy  

"I'll start, to save money on energy I fill empty glass jars with water and store them in my fridge. It costs more to cool an empty fridge than a full one, and since I don't eat very much my fridge is often nearly empty. Not sure how much this has saved me, but now I have water if I ever were to need it!" Just_Throw_Away_67

"Blackout curtains because I live in the South so it’s always hot. I also have privacy film that blocks some UV rays when I do want some light. Using a floor fan in my room (where I spend the majority of my time) with the door closed to keep it cooler. Close the air vents in my guest room since it’s primarily unused to cut down on AC costs. Cook large batches of food at one time so I’m not constantly using my stove/oven." eternally_feral

"It’s a pain to heat the whole oven for a little food. I recommend an air fryer over a toaster oven though. They’re a bit faster (and you can still make toast)." MissDisplaced

  - YouTube  www.youtube.com  

"I keep my heating and cooling low. I can wear extra layers or less to get to a comfortable temp." Reasonable-Cold2161

"I read a tip to not bother doing a full 'grocery shop' trip if it doesn’t work for you/doesn’t make sense for you. Rather, if you find you’re throwing food away you couldn’t eat in time, try to do the method of going to the store of getting, say, just what you need for tonight and tomorrow’s meals, or whatever." citynomad1

"Grocery delivery. I end up spending 50% less compared to shopping in the store." Everydaylookwithin

"This is why I do curbside pickup. I order through the app, see what deals and coupons they have, stick to my list and don’t end up impulse buying. An added bonus is I can pick up on my way home from work and not spend time waiting in the checkout line." zoebadwolf

 fridge, refrigerator, save money, the fridge, open fridge Hungry Midnight Snack GIF  Giphy  

"It took a little bit of up front investment, but I dumped my gigantic and ancient energy-hungry fridge a long time ago for a brand new one that is much smaller and also has a variable speed compressor for extra efficiency. The energy savings from that move alone probably paid for the fridge several times over by now." BrewCityChaserV2

"I have a countertop dishwasher that I intentionally use only during off-peak hours. Luckily, this rental has a new refrigerator, and I run my air purifier on its 2 hour timer during those off hours (cat hair lol). Oh- I bought a Tushy bidet on sale- it pays for itself in the first year!" sk8rcruz

"I always bring my own lunch to work. I also cut up fresh veggies, put them in ziploc bags, freeze them, and then steam them later in the microwave. You can also just put a whole bag of spinach in the freezer and then steam it in the microwave. Clean with a plastic spray bottle of vinegar and dish soap. Sprinkle baking soda on carpets and rugs before vacuuming." Unhappy-Jaguar-9362

 costco, costco card, costco gift, buy bulk, bulk shopping Conan Costco GIF by Team Coco  Giphy  

"I have milk jugs with water in them in the fridge and freezer. I also buy in bulk. Usually the more you buy the cheaper per unit it is. I have a year supply of everything (joking) not quite but almost. I keep my air conditioner at a warmer temperature and use a fan to cool me all the way. I close blinds and curtains during the day. This cuts down on the heat in the room. Unfortunately it is dark in my apartment during the day , but this can make a difference of up to 10 degrees. This saves on cooling costs. Instead of buying single servings of food. I make a family size amount and put the leftovers in round dinner containers all ready to go for the next meal. These can also be frozen if you don't want the same thing a couple days in a row and put in the microwave for 6 or 7 minutes." Delightful_Helper

"I buy the family size packs of meats, divide and freeze. I also still cook big meals like when my kids were teenagers and divide them into portions and freeze. Its simply too hard to cook for one person. I make a weekly menu of the dishes I want to cook and then place my order for the grocery delivery. It does save money and since I cook a lot of casseroles, big pots of soups and stews, etc., and freeze in portions. I use my air fryer to warm the frozen dishes instead of the oven. It has almost become my hobby to have a variety of different meals through out the week without having to cook every day. Life is good 😊." No_Guava_90

 casserole, casseroles, cooking, baking, big batch Latter Day Saints Dancing GIF by Jukebox Saints  Giphy  

"I try to avoid one time use items. For example: bottled water, wipes, swiffer dusters and mop heads, paper towels, etc add up rather quickly. I use reusable mop pads, reusable duster heads and i always have a stainless steel water bottle with me so i don't have to buy water when I'm out." Rich_Group_8997

"If you own your house: Ceiling fans in every room that have a ceiling light fixture in the center. I also changed almost all lights to LED. When the furnace was red-tagged, I replaced it and the AC. It was a budget buster but there was a federal government rebate. My bills are less and it’s much more efficient and quieter." GRIThere

"I turned up my ac and invested in a dreo fan and another simple standing fan for my room and living room. It’s going to save me about 50 bucks this month I think. Also stocking up on beans and rice and frozen veggies and proteins. Keeps me from eating out of if I don’t want to cook. Also making more than I can realistically eat in 3 or 4 days and freezing the rest. Also utilizing holiday sales for big ticket items. I bought a mattress around Memorial Day and a washer this past week for Father’s Day sales at Lowe’s. The washer was actually 100$ cheaper the day after I bought it so I went in and was refunded the difference." MindPerastalsis

"I live in the southwest. It cracks me up to hear that people are fainting and falling ill in 100 degree heat. It's regularly hotter than hell here. I have two layers of reflectix in all my windows. And I have insulated curtains over that. Then I have two AC units. They are both window units but they are big enough individually to cool my tiny house. I sectioned off my house so that I only have to cool the room I am in. I built a solar water heater. I haven't eaten out in years. I repair everything if I can and have invested in lots of tools. I get up stupid early in the morning so I can sit outside in the coolest part of the day. I only shop for groceries once a month and I use the app so I don't impulse buy. I buy large cuts of meat, then I smoke it all and portion it up and freeze it. Makes daily cooking short and sweet I have leftovers from last night for lunch every day. I make my own coffee and bread I turn on my water heater, when it's cold outside, long enough to heat it up and then I shut it back off. I have it turned up a little bit more so it gets a little hotter, but I only run it for an hour or two every two days. I don't smoke cigarettes. I do vape but I go through like $20 worth of vape pods a month instead of pack after pack of expensive cigarettes. When I use the shopping apps I pay close attention to the cost per oz and get the cheapest I can. I own my vehicle outright. It's older but reliable. I don't have any debt other than my phone and power bill. I only subscribe to 3 streaming services because they are a bundle deal. I don't have cable and my Internet is the cheapest deal I can find. Results are still coming in but I estimate I have cut my power bill alone in half and that's the single most expensive thing I pay." AuntBarba

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The 4 words that can keep conversation flowing forever, even between socially awkward people

You can keep seamlessly transitioning to more interesting topics.

via Canva/Photos

A couple talking over coffee.

Many people find making small talk to be an excruciating experience. They think it’s boring to talk with a stranger about the weather, sports, or weekend plans. They may also feel like they don’t have anything to contribute to the conversation, or they don’t understand the point of having one in the first place.

However, those who excel at making small talk have a tremendous advantage in their professional and romantic relationships, as well as in forming new friendships. Most importantly, small talk is a window to transition into medium talk or, eventually, deep, meaningful conversations. The problem is that many people get stuck in small talk, and things stall before progressing to something beneficial.

 conversation, small talk, conversation tips, communications tips, medium talk, reminder A man and woman chatting.via Canva/Photos

How to get better at small talk

The great thing is that, like anything, making small talk is a skill that we can all improve by learning some simple conversation techniques. One technique that is great for keeping a conversation going, like hitting a ball back and forth past a net in tennis, is a simple statement: It reminds me of…”

A redditor named IsaihLikesToConnect shared some great examples of how the phrase can be used to turn a mundane topic, such as the weather, into something much more fun.

Them: "It's been really rainy, huh?"

You:

Option 1 (Personal Story): "Yeah, it reminds me of a time I went on a run in the rain and nearly got hit by a car."

Option 2 (Music / Pop Culture): "It reminds me of every Adele song. When I'm driving, I feel like I'm in a music video."

Option 3 (Family): "It reminds me of my dad, he used to love playing with us in the rain as kids."

Option 4 (Thing you watched / World News): "It reminds me of this documentary I saw where they're trying to make it rain in the Sahara Desert.”

Option 5 (Place you lived): “It reminds me of when I lived in Australia, it barely ever rained there. I actually love this weather.”


 conversation, small talk, conversation tips, communications tips, medium talk, reminder Coworkers having a conversation.via Canva/Photos

You see in this example that using “It reminds me of…” opened up the conversation to five potential new and more exciting topics. The “You” in the story could have responded with, “Yeah, it sure is rainy,” and the conversation would have ended right there. But instead, branching off the topic of rain into something a bit deeper took the conversation to the next level. You get extra points if you can take the “reminds me of” into a topic that you assume the other person will be interested in.

 conversation, small talk, conversation tips, communications tips, medium talk, reminder Coworkers having a conversation.via Canva/Photos

What’s a polite way to change the topic in a conversation?

Using “this reminds me of…” is also a polite way to move the topics in another direction, especially when it's a topic that you don’t want to discuss or one that makes you feel a bit uncomfortable. Or, if it’s a situation where the other person is monologing on one topic for a very long time, this makes it easy to transition away from their diatribe.

Ultimately, the phrase is an excellent way for you to save the person you’re talking to from being stuck in the small talk rut as well. It shows you understand that when someone brings up the weather, they are merely getting things started with something both of you have in common. They probably don’t want to talk about the weather for 30 minutes, unless they are a meteorologist. “It reminds me of…” is an invitation to go a bit deeper and shows the other person that you’d like to learn more about them.

This article originally appeared in April.

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Touching video shows a young boy saying goodbye to the garbage man he's greeted for 4 years

What started as a love of big trucks became a friendship.

via Canva/Photos

A sanitation worker taking a garbage can to the truck.

There are many wonderful reasons why little kids are fascinated, and at the same time, perhaps a little scared of garbage trucks. They have bright colors, flashing lights, and have massive moving parts that shriek and moan as they lift the garbage bins and throw them in the back of the truck. They are also impressed by the operator who pulls the levers and makes the massive machine lift and dump.

Little kids have this fascination until they are around five or six, until one day when the garbage man comes by they no longer feel the need to run out and watch. However, a touching story out of Florida shows that nine-year-old Noah Carrigan never lost his love for the garbage man, and that’s because they forged a sweet relationship. But unfortunately, after the city changed its waste management contracts, the garbage collector will no longer stop by Noah’s house.

“It started out as something so simple—he was just fascinated by the garbage truck,” Noah’s mom, Catherine Carrigan, told SWNS. “For years, every Tuesday, he would run outside to wave, and the garbage man always waved back, honked the horn, and acknowledged him.” She filmed the garbage man’s last pickup at his house, and it marked the end of an era.

  - YouTube  www.youtube.com  

On the garbage man’s final visit, Noah handed him a bottle of water, a handwritten note, and some gifts to express his gratitude and appreciation for the kindness and years of friendship. "He wanted to write him a thank you note with garbage truck toys he used to play with," the mother wrote on a social media post. “This farewell hit hard,” she admitted.


 


One of the unique aspects of being a parent is that there are many last moments you have with your child, although you never know it at the time. Whether it’s the last time you pick up your child, the final time that you read The Little Engine That Could, or the last time that you put a Band-Aid on their knee after a fall, these final moments go without fanfare, but if you knew at the time that you’d never have that moment again, you’d cherish every second.

 garbage man, sanitation worker, thumbs up, trash, garbage truck, orange jacket A sanitation worker giving the big thumbs up.via Canva/Photos

That's why parents need to take a moment to realize that they are in the midst of something beautiful that is fleeting. So, when there are those nights when you're tired and don’t feel like reading them a book before bed, or getting off the couch to play catch, knowing you only have so many of these moments is a great way to enjoy them. Because one day, when they’re gone, you’ll wish you could have read one more book or spent that nice spring day on the lawn throwing a ball around.

That’s why the story about young Noah and the garbage man is wonderful. On one level, it's a touching story about the friendship between a man and a young boy, highlighting the importance of the people who work in our communities. On the other hand, it’s a reminder that some of these simple joys in life we share with children will one day end—and you can’t turn back the clock.

This article originally appeared in April.

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