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Try To See If You Recognize Your State On This Map. I Bet Ya Don't.

I'm from Missouri. In school we learned a LOT about Lewis and Clark, Sacajawea, and all sorts of rich Missouri history stuff. (I even know that the word "Missouri" means "of the big canoe.") So when I saw this map, I thought, "Oh yeah, I'm gonna know this stuff." Nope. It's more than a bummer how overlooked Native American history is, and I hope this map adds a tiny blip of awareness to a too-long-ignored past.

What's *your* state's original name?

Alabama (Chickasha) – The Chickasha also had a strong presence in modern-day Mississippi. Most were removed and relocated to south-central Oklahoma in the decade following the Indian Removal Act of 1830. Descendants reside there today.


Arizona (Ndeh) – Widely known as Chiricahua Apache, they currently reside on various reservations throughout Arizona, notably the San Carlos Reservation.

Arkansas (Ugakhpa)Removed to Oklahoma in 1834. Today, they roll 3,240 deep. The name “Arkansas” comes from “Arkansea,” the name they were called by the Algonquian-speaking Illini people.

California (Chumash) – Before Spanish contact in 1789, they were 22,000 strong and lived in the territory stretching from modern-day Malibu to Paso Robles. By the mid-1830s, their “officially registered” numbers were down to under 3,000. Today, they live mostly on the Santa Ynez Reservation in Santa Barbara, where there are 249 residents.

Colorado (Hinonoeino) – In 1864, Col. John Chivington and his Colorado militiamen murdered an estimated 70-163 Hinonoeino (Arapaho) in a sneak attack that become known as the Sand Creek massacre. In 1999, two “Northern Arapaho” descendants named Ben and Gail Ridgely organized a group of runners to run from Limon, Colorado, to Ethete, Wyoming, in commemoration of their ancestors who were forced to escape Chivington’s forces on foot. Most Hinonoeino still live in Colorado.

Connecticut (Quinnipiac)Widely dispersed as a result of ethnic cleansing, religious conversion and encroachment happened to them at the hands of Puritans. Today, refugee descendants can be found as far west as Texas and as far north as Quebec.

Delaware (Nanticoke) – The first Nanticoke reservation was established in 1684. In 1881, they reorganized as the Nanticoke Indian Association and in 1922 were chartered as a non-profit organization. Today, they regularly host public cultural events, like powwows.

Florida (Thimogna)Reduced by conquest from one of the largest tribes in the southeast, with 35 separate chiefdoms, to utter extinction by the turn of the 19th century.

Georgia (Muscogee)Removed to Oklahoma and a small strip in Alabama in 1832. Now they are dispersed largely throughout the southeastern U.S.

Idaho (Nimi) – Reside largely on the 770,000-acre Nez Perce Reservation, the largest in Idaho. Their original territory was estimated at 17 million acres.

Illinois (Kaskaskaham) – The pre-eminent cause of death among the Kaskaskia was disease brought by Europeans, to which they had no immunity. Today, their numbers are a fraction of what they once were, and they mostly reside in Oklahoma.

Indiana (Mengakonkia) – Now recognized as part of the Miami Nation, they reside throughout Indiana, Oklahoma, and parts of Michigan and Ohio.

Iowa (Bah-kho-je)517 of the currently registered 697 members now live in Oklahoma.

Kansas (Hutanga) – Also known as the Kansa or Kaw. The last fluent speaker of the Kansa language reportedly died in 1983, and the last full-blooded member died in 2000.

Kentucky (Honniasont) – Described as a “little-known indigenous people” who inhabited the Ohio Valley above Louisville.

Louisiana (Yuk'hiti ishak)Most are believed to have been decimated by disease in the 1850s. But descendants live in Texas and Louisiana, and a group of 450 gathered for the first time in over 100 years in 2006.

Maine (Lnu'k) – A strong presence in modern-day Canada, they signed a historic agreement in 2010 stating that the federal government had to consult them before pursuing any activities or projects that impact them.

Maryland (Accomack) – Later known as the Gingaskin, their Virginia reservation was dissolved by the state’s General Assembly in 1813. Today, their descendants live in Maryland and Virginia.

Massachusetts (Massachusett) – One of the first groups to encounter Europeans, their numbers saw an early, sudden, and rapid decline in the 17th and 18th centuries due to infectious diseases. Descendants continue to live in the greater Boston area.

Michigan (Meskwaki)Today, most live in a settlement in Tama County, Iowa. During World War II, many served in North Africa as “code talkers” against the Germans.

Minnesota (Dakota) – Following the Dakota War of 1862, where Dakota fighters spent the end of summer raiding white homesteads and killing hundreds of settlers, 38 Dakota men were found guilty of rape and murder. Abraham Lincoln had them all killed in the largest mass execution in American history. Today, Dakota people are widely dispersed throughout the Midwest and South.

Mississippi (Chahta) – Per the 2010 Census, Chahta people live in every state of the union. Despite their origins in the Deep South, their largest numbers are in Oklahoma, followed by Texas then California.

Missouri (Neutache)Many had their own federally allotted homesteads by the early 20th century, but in 1912, the government forced them off their lands when they discovered oil there. Today, they are based in Red Rock, Oklahoma.

Montana (Apsáalooke) – The 2000 Census reported over 6,000 members living on reservations, mostly the 2,300,000-acre Crow Indian Reservation in south-central Montana. In 2008, Barack Obama became the first presidential candidate to ever visit the nation.

Nebraska (Umonhon)In the 1930s and 1940s, archaeologists excavated a large number of skeletons from Umomhon (Omaha) burial grounds and grave sites and held them in museums for study. In 1989, the Umonhon reclaimed 100 of their ancestors’ skeletons.

Nevada (Numa)As of last year, 892 members lived on reservations throughout southwestern Utah. Others reside in California and Nevada.

New Hampshire (Penakuk)Massive numbers of Penakuk were killed off by diseases introduced by Europeans. Many fled north and west, where many more were murdered by English colonists. Though they are no longer recognized as a distinct group, “many bands of Abenaki … in New Hampshire, Canada, and Vermont have Penakuk blood in their veins.

New Jersey (Lenni-Lenape)Most were forced westward by Europeans and ended up as widely dispersed as New York, Canada, Colorado, Kansas, and Idaho. Some still reside in New Jersey, but “large communities” live near Bartlesville and Anadarko, Oklahoma.

New Mexico (Nafiat)The Nafiat are one of New Mexico’s myriad “Pueblo” tribes. In 2013, a bill passed in Congress that would transfer 700 acres of national forest land to their Sandia Pueblo holdings. It is “unclear” whether the House will “take any action about the bill.”

New York (Kanien'kehaka)Today, most members live in settlements throughout northern New York and southeastern Canada. In 2012, Time magazine ran a profile of some of the Kanien’kehaka – commonly known as “Mohawk” – ironworkers who made up about 10% of those building the One World Trade Center tower.

North Carolina (Skarureh)Originally one of the most prominent nations in North Carolina, the Skarureh now have neither federal nor state recognition. Their descendants mostly live in Oklahoma, where they’ve been absorbed into other groups like the Seneca and Cayuga.

North Dakota (Hiraacá)A smallpox epidemic in 1837-1838 reduced their numbers to around 500. Today, their descendants reside mainly on the Fort Berthold Reservation in North Dakota, where they’ve affiliated themselves with two other groups, the Mandan and the Arikara.

Ohio (Shawanwa)A group of Shawanwa known as the “Loyal Shawnee” were among the very last to leave their Ohio homeland in the late 19th century. In 2008, the federal government counted 7,584 “enrolled” members, most living in Oklahoma.

Oklahoma (Niukonska)The Niukonska – known as “Osage” – were one of the only American Indian nations to buy their own reservation. It currently encompasses 1,470,000 acres in present-day Osage County, Oklahoma.

Oregon (Nimipu)Today, tribal lands are mostly centered on a reservation in northern Idaho. Nimipu Chief Joseph stated one of the most famous surrender quotes in American history: "Hear me, my chiefs, I am tired. My heart is sick and sad. From where the sun now stands, I will fight no more forever."

Pennsylvania (Alliwegis)The majority were wiped out early on during wars with other Native tribes. Anthropologists have hypothesized that the remaining few fled to Virginia and South Carolina. Some of the Seneca people living in Kansas and Oklahoma claim to be descendants.

Rhode Island (Narragansett) – They lost much of their land during Rhode Island’s “detribalization” efforts between 1880-1884. They still reside in Rhode Island but have been embroiled in constant legal battles over land ever since.

South Carolina (Ye Iswah h're) The U.S. government terminated their registered tribe status in 1959, and it wasn’t until 1993 that they regained federal recognition. As of 2006, their numbers had grown to about 2,600.

South Dakota (Lakota)The Lakota are currently recognized as a semi-autonomous nation within the U.S. This gives them leeway in deviating from some state laws – such as gambling – but ultimately they’re beholden to federal oversight. Some Lakota have been active in efforts to secede from the states altogether. In 2014, a group launched a digital currency called MazaCoin, which they dubbed “the national currency of the traditional Lakota nation.”

Tennessee (Ani'yunwi'ya)Commonly known as the “Cherokee” nation, most now reside in Oklahoma and North Carolina. Many even made their way to Oregon and California, where they were drawn by job availability during the Great Depression.

Texas (Numunuu)They have around 15,191 members today, around half of whom live in the tribal jurisdictional area around Lawton and Fort Sill, Oklahoma. Less than 1% of them speak their original language today.

Utah (Nunt'zi)Primarily dispersed throughout three reservations in Utah, one of which also bleeds into Colorado and New Mexico. In total, they number about 7,000.

Vermont (Alnobak)One of a handful of tribes whose numbers appear to have grown in recent years. Between 1990 and 2000, the Alnobak population in America jumped from 1,549 to 2,544 people, with 6,012 claiming Alnobak (“Abenaki”) heritage. In Canada, they numbered 2,164 in 2006.

Virginia (Monacan)To date, they have not been recognized as a tribe by the federal government. As of 2009, there are approximately 2,000 identifying members.

Washington (Waluulapam)Today, most live on the Confederated Tribes of the Umatilla Indian Reservation near Pendleton, in northeastern Oregon.

West Virginia (Mohetan) – No known populations survive today. The best-known document of the Mohetan’s existence has been brief mentions in the journals of English explorers from the 1600s.

Wisconsin (Mamaceqtaw)Their tribe status was terminated by the U.S. government in the 1950s, but they regained federal recognition in 1973. The Mamaceqtaw (Menominee) have 8,700 members today, mostly on a 353.894-square mile reservation in Wisconsin.

Wyoming (Tsisistas)Merged with the Sutai people in the early 19th century, today they are collectively recognized as the Southern and Northern Cheyenne. Intermarriage with other groups has blurred definitive population count, but estimates put total “Cheyenne” numbers at over 20,000.

shhh, quiet, zip it, mouth closed, say nothing, be quiet

A woman zipping up her lips.

There are times to speak up, moments when it’s best to say nothing, and opportunities be very considerate in your response. But when you’re on the receiving end of a back-handed compliment, a foolish remark, or a coworker takes you down a peg, and your emotions are up, it can be hard to have a thoughtful response. Often, we say something we shouldn’t.

How is it that some folks fly off the handle and say things they’ll later regret, while others can stay calm and remove themselves from the situation or take the high ground? One way to be less impulsive with your words is to use the “name it to tame it” neuroscience hack, originally coined by author and psychiatrist Dr. Dan Siegel. When used properly, it allows you to step back from the moment and choose the best response in a challenging situation.


shhh, quiet, zip it, mouth closed, say nothing, be quiet A man saying "be quiet."via Canva/Photos

How to use the ‘name it to tame it’ hack

When someone upsets you, the first thing to do is to go inside yourself and describe the emotion that you feel in your body. Are you angry? Are you sad? Are you afraid? Do you feel rejected? Are you disappointed? The moment you name the emotion, it will begin to subside and give you the emotional and mental room to respond to the person who caused the negative emotion, rather than impulsively reacting.

How to respond to a reactive emotion so you don’t fly off the handle:

Event happens:

1. Your body stiffens up

2. You feel an intense emotion

3. You examine the emotion and give it a name: “My body is telling me I am angry.”

4. You should feel the emotion beginning to subside

5. Choose your response instead of being impulsive

shhh, quiet, zip it, mouth closed, say nothing, be quiet A woman zipping up her mouth.via Canva/Photos

Why does ‘name it to tame it’ work?

“Name it to tame it” works because, when we have a strong emotional reaction, our lizard brain kicks in, and we go into fight, flight, or freeze mode. The lizard brain is not known for giving thoughtful and strategic responses to challenging situations. When we name the emotion, our prefrontal cortex, or the thinking brain, kicks in. The thinking brain looks at the situation and says, “Alright, we don’t need to run or fight here. It's best to give a strategic response.”

When we tune into the negative emotions by naming them, they relax because they feel heard, like when a child has hurt their knee or a loved one has real concern and you gives them undivided attention. Once the emotions are named, they are tamed. Then, you are more likely to respond to the negative person with grace and speak from the best part of yourself.

Dr. Dan Siegel, who coined the phrase “Name it to tame it,” explains the brain science behind the technique in the video below. He does a great job of explaining how it allows us to transfer our thoughts from the downstairs brain (the lizard brain) to the upstairs brain (the thinking brain), so we can calm down and respond appropriately to the situation.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

hospice, hospice volunteer, impact theory, impact theory podcast, tom bilyeu, apple podcast, james sexton, death

Left: An older women side by side with a younger woman. Right: A young male hospital worker and a male patient.

In a recent, thought-provoking episode of the Impact Theory podcast with Tom Bilyeu, renowned divorce attorney and author James Sexton shared how being a hospice volunteer drastically changed his perspective on life.

"I think when you turn 18, you should have to do a year or two of mandatory hospice volunteering," Sexton said. "It changed my entire way of viewing the world."


Sexton recalled that while death itself wasn't necessarily the prime source of conversation—most of his volunteer work involved doing little odds and ends for folks—its presence was still palpable. Because of that, he walked out of each visit feeling like a "samurai," as all the things he thought were "so important five minutes ago" fell to the wayside.

"Spend time with people that are dying," he said. "All their stuff is a great big pile of nothing. Like, all that they can talk about is the people that they love, the connections that they made, the experiences that they had that were beautiful or painful."

That realization became even more apparent when he learned that his own mother was terminally ill with cancer and past the point that any doctor could help her.

"In that moment, all of the other things that I was stressed about and worried about, the volume was turned so far down on all those things because my mom was gonna die," Sexton said. "All that became important was how could I spend a little more time with her. How can I make sure she knows that I love her? How can I savor this?"

Developing an awareness of death during early adulthood, Sexton argued, would help people not get "distracted" by a society that constantly tries to make you forget that death is inevitable. Therefore, they wouldn't pay attention to the "meaningless sh*t that keeps the machine moving," and instead focus on what really matters.

And what really matters? Important things like kissing a spouse, for example, which Sexton reminded Bilyeu (and, conversely, all of us) happen a finite number of times. You won't know what that finite number is "until you've passed it," he warned.

hospice, hospice volunteer, impact theory, impact theory podcast, tom bilyeu, apple podcast, james sexton, death A couple kissing.Photo credit: Canva

"If you don't keep that in your line of sight, you're a fool," Sexton said. "You're gonna think you're gonna get to do that forever. You're gonna think you can do that all time and you don't. You will not do that forever. ... And that's the most beautiful thing in the world. It's what makes that so special."

For Sexton, being a hospice volunteer cemented this perspective, and since then, "nothing has been the same." It didn't mean suddenly "living life like a monk," but it did mean sharing his love a little more freely and appreciating that "things have to end."

Between hospice volunteering and working as a divorce lawyer, Sexton has become an expert of sorts with "endings." He argues that we must look at life through this lens because the one constant is that "everything is ending all the time," and ignoring that fact "does a tremendous disservice."

American culture generally treats death with avoidance, viewing it as a taboo topic or a medical failure rather than a natural stage of life. It is highly clinical and sanitized, with many people dying in hospitals away from family and loved ones. While shifting toward more home-based hospice care, U.S. society remains heavily influenced by "death-denying" attitudes that emphasize quick, efficient mourning. Compare that to other cultures with consistent mourning rituals, like Mexico's Día de los Muertos and Japan's Obon.

Perhaps Sexton's hospice volunteering concept could act as something similar to these traditions—a rite of passage that doesn't have us avoiding death, but walking alongside it.

You can watch the full Impact Theory episode below:

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Health

Psychologists say there are 4 types of introverts. These are the personality traits of each one.

The four types of introverts: Social, Thinking, Anxious, and Restrained.

introvert, introvers, types of introverts, introverted, introvert types, 4 introvert types

A woman sits in a chair reading a book.

Introverts can have many personality stereotypes. Many people assume they are quiet homebodies who prefer alone time, but not all introverts are the same.

Psychologist Jonathan M. Cheek, along with his colleagues Jennifer Grimes and Julie Norem at Wellesley College, presented findings in a 2011 study identifying four types of introverts: Social, Thinking, Anxious, and Restrained (STAR).


"Many people assume introversion is fixed, but introversion is on a spectrum," Chloë Bean, a somatic trauma therapist in Los Angeles, told Upworthy.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Essentially, there is no one-size-fits-all type of introvert.

"It can shift depending on life phase, your stress level, burnout, support system, and trauma history," Bean said. "What looks like 'being introverted' is sometimes the nervous system doing it's job, protecting you especially when you're feeling overwhelmed or need to connect with yourself more."

Four types of introverts

In an interview with The Cut, Cheek explained that these introvert "types" are more like "shades," and that introverts are often a mix of each one. Here's what you need to know about each type of introvert:

introvert, introverts, being introverted, social introvert, introverts hanging out Three women sit on a blanket in the park. Photo credit: Canva

Social introverts

Bean noted that social introverts may be selective about who they connect with. They enjoy spending time with others but need downtime to recover.

"They prefer to stay home with a book or a computer, or to stick to small gatherings with close friends, as opposed to attending large parties with many strangers," Cheek explained.

How to tell if it's you:

"You may tend to lose a lot of energy when socializing in large groups even when they're fun and prefer one-on-one time," said Bean. "You may feel more regulated with one person at a time, as you can feel overstimulated with more than one person at a time."

Thinking introverts

Thinking introverts are internally rich, deep, and active but appear quiet on the outside, Bean noted. They spend a lot of time reflecting, imagining, creating, or analyzing.

"You're capable of getting lost in an internal fantasy world," Cheek said. "But it's not in a neurotic way, it's in an imaginative and creative way."

How to tell if it's you:

"You feel energized and excited by ideas but you feel exhausted when there is constant feedback and stimulation externally," Bean explained. "You need time to be with your thoughts to come to your conclusion so staying with your inner voice and process is supportive because you can get easily distracted by others' thoughts and opinions."

@onlyjayus

The 4 Types Of Introverts

Anxious introverts

Bean said that anxious introverts deal with anxiety and avoidance driven by fear, as the body anticipates rejection or not being accepted socially.

How to tell if it's you:

"You might replay conversations, dread upcoming plans and cancel them when the tension and anxiety gets too strong," Bean shared. "This is often less about your personality and more about your nervous system feeling dysregulated by thoughts about socializing."

Restrained introverts

Restrained introverts are highly observant, take time to warm up to others, and are cautious about who they spend their energy with, Bean explained.

How to tell if it's you:

"It might take you some time to feel like you can trust others and feel safe enough to speak up," Bean said. "You might also avoid being put on the spot or being the center of attention."

boomer, boomers, boomer clutter, clutter, hoarding, too much stuff

A Baby Boomer stands in his cluttered garage.

Millennials with Baby Boomer parents have not been shy about airing their complaints about the older generation. Millennials have previously noted that their parents tend to hoard food—and now they're are airing their grievances about Boomer "stuff avalanche."

On Reddit, Millennials discussed their frustrations about their Boomer parents and the insane amount of junk they have in their homes that (allegedly) will one day be passed down to them to deal with. Many Millennials shared that it is a source of contention for them, and that they wish their parents would just throw things out.


"3 car garage...cannot fit a single car in there," one commented. And another stated, "I am very concerned with the amount of junk my parents are holding onto."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

A fellow peeved Millennial added, "The worst part is that our parents think this is all worth lots and lots of money. Don’t worry kids, these three sets of china I’m saving for you will be worth millions!"

Another had laid down the law: "My mom kept joking about all the 'stuff' being my inheritance. After a few times I was tired of it, I looked her dead in the face and said in the most monotone I could get. 'I will get the biggest dumpster I can, and it will all go in the trash.' She stopped making that joke, and my parents have been slowly throwing out their junk ever since."

clutter, baby boomer stuff avalance, stuff, too much stuff, decluttering A Baby Boomer garage filled with stuff.Photo credit: Canva

Why Boomers struggle to throw things away

"The Boomer generation grew up in the post-war era shaped by rationing and economic rebuilding," Daniel Glazer, clinical psychologist and co-founder of US Therapy Rooms, tells Upworthy.

He adds that the Boomer inability to let stuff go is often criticized, but when you look at the psychology of their attachment to objects, their behavior makes much more sense.

"Not so long ago, saving things was an adaptive habit. 'That might come in handy' was a common refrain in households in which replacing something was not so easy, or affordable," says Glazer. "There is also an element of emotional security that comes from the things that have surrounded us through decades of life events, or even across a lifetime."

And for many Boomers, getting rid of stuff can signify an even bigger mental battle.

"As people age, there can also be an increased awareness of mortality," says Esin Pinarli, founder and holistic psychotherapist at Eternal Wellness Counseling. "Letting go of objects can feel symbolic, almost like letting go of chapters of their life. If no one is asking about those chapters anymore, those objects become the tangible proof that those experiences mattered. So it’s not stubbornness. It’s often about attachment, meaning-making, and a fear of losing relevance or erasing parts of their story."

How to help Boomers declutter

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Starting the conversation with Boomer parents in an empathetic and understanding way may help the process go more smoothly and deepen the relationship between them and their children. Here are a few examples of conversation starters Millennials can use when talking to their Boomer parents about decluttering:

Conversation Starter #1: "I know these things mean something to you. I’d love to hear the story behind a few of them."

"This shifts the focus from getting rid of objects to honoring the meaning behind them," says Pinarli. "When a parent feels seen and understood, they’re often more open to eventually letting go. It validates that the attachment is about memory and identity, not just stuff."

Conversation Starter #2: "What would feel good for you to keep, and what feels like it’s just taking up space now?"

"This gives them agency," Pinarli explains. "Instead of telling them what to throw away, it invites them to reflect on what still feels meaningful versus what might no longer serve them. That sense of control reduces defensiveness."

Conversation Starter #3: "Would it help to go through this together so we can make sure the important things are preserved?"

"This frames decluttering as a collaborative and supportive process, not a demand," Pinarli shares. "It reassures them that their memories and legacy won’t be dismissed or erased, which can lower the emotional intensity around letting go."

tipping culture debate, server tip note receipt, Lionell Carr Threads viral, restaurant tipping 2026, tipping etiquette US, Pew Research tipping survey, server minimum wage tips, cash tip restaurant, tipping fatigue America, viral restaurant receipt
Canva

A restaurant customer looks at his bill

Lionell Carr (@lionellsaidit2) stopped for breakfast while traveling over the holidays. His bill came to $33.06. He paid on the card, leaving the tip line blank because he planned to leave cash on the table. Before he could, the bill came back.

Written on the receipt in bold red letters: "Learn to TIP. It's not my job to serve you FOR FREE!"


Carr posted a photo of it to Threads last December, with a caption that summed up his reaction: "On my holiday travels, I stopped and had breakfast. this occurred afterwards. I was gonna leave a cash tip......" He added, "These servers are out of control, a lot of times they blocked their blessings for greed!"

The post has since pulled in 4.5 million views, according to Newsweek, and the comment section became exactly what you'd expect: a full-scale argument about one of the most reliably combustible topics in American public life.

On one side, people who felt the server crossed a line. "If you're not getting paid by your EMPLOYER, that's your fault. Tipping is OPTIONAL," wrote @gaga.looie. @trice_the_bea added, "U.S.A. should start learning how to pay its workers. Tips should be a reward for kind service, not their paycheck."

On the other, people who felt the server's frustration was completely understandable given the economic reality behind it. "greed? in U.S. servers get a base salary of $2.13/hour on average," wrote @lucy.vard. "The majority of the money they make is tips. We can argue that the system is broken, and restaurant owners should pay their employees, and, while valid, it's a different point. This is how system works, and we shouldn't punish people for the system's imperfection."

tipping culture debate, server tip note receipt, Lionell Carr Threads viral, restaurant tipping 2026, tipping etiquette US, Pew Research tipping survey, server minimum wage tips, cash tip restaurant, tipping fatigue America, viral restaurant receipt YouTube

Both responses capture something true, which is probably why this post keeps spreading.

The structural reality is that the American tipping system puts servers and customers in an uncomfortable position that neither of them created. According to a 2023 Pew Research Center survey, 72% of U.S. adults say they are being asked to tip in more places than five years ago. More Americans oppose businesses suggesting tip amounts (40%) than support it (24%). And 77% of diners say the quality of service is their primary factor in deciding how much to tip, which means a server's income is perpetually attached to variables outside their control.

That pressure is real. So is the frustration of a customer who genuinely intended to leave cash and got a lecture in red ink before he had the chance.

What makes this story harder to resolve than it looks is that the server's note wasn't wrong about the economics. It was just aimed at the wrong person. The broken part of the system isn't the customer who leaves cash instead of a card tip. It's the system that pays servers $2.13 an hour and asks both parties to sort out the rest between themselves.

@azjohnsons put it plainly in the comments: "Tips are their salary. Not a blessing. They worked and should be paid. Sorry for the frustrated note but I get it."

That might be the most honest sentence in the whole thread.

tipping culture debate, server tip note receipt, Lionell Carr Threads viral, restaurant tipping 2026, tipping etiquette US, Pew Research tipping survey, server minimum wage tips, cash tip restaurant, tipping fatigue America, viral restaurant receipt YouTube

You can follow Lionell Carr (@lionellsaidit2) on Instagram Threads for more content on lifestyle.

This article originally appeared earlier this year.