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connection

Mental Health

Researchers reveal that the one key to happiness might not be what you thought

"The single strongest predictor of happiness isn't purpose at all."

Women happily frolic together amidst sunflowers.

For so long, many people have conflated the search for life's meaning with happiness. Perhaps you've seen the lonely monk in a movie, sitting atop a mountain meditating and looking for answers in solitude. While this is all very well and good (it actually really is in terms of well-being,) it simply doesn't translate to being "happy."

monk, meditation, mountain, Buddhism, searching A monk sits on top of a mountain. pxhere.com

In the "Purpose-Happiness Connection" in Psychology Today, author Jordan Grumet M.D. poses this question: "What if the key to happiness isn’t what we’ve been told?"

He then shares that for years, we believed that "finding a deep purpose in life is essential to happiness." But as it turns out, it's much simpler than that. The true key to happiness is…connection.

"One of the most robust studies on happiness, the Harvard Study of Adult Development, which has tracked participants for more than 80 years, found that the single strongest predictor of happiness isn’t purpose at all—it’s relationships."

Neuroscientist, professor, and podcast host of The Huberman Lab, Andrew Huberman is a big believer that changing one's behavior can change their thought patterns, leading to a happier brain. He interviews Dr. Laurie Santos, a professor of psychology at Yale, who states the thing you DON'T have to do is "change your circumstances." (Because well, you can't.) "Quintupling your income is tricky, moving is tricky, switching your life around all over the place is hard. And the good news is science shows you don’t have to do that. That doesn't work as well as you'd think."

"But," she says, "you can hack your behaviors and your thought patterns and your feelings to get good results. Let's talk behaviors: one of the biggest behavioral changes you can make to feel happier? Is just to get a little more social connection."

- YouTubewww.youtube.com, The Huberman Lab podcast

She continues, "Psychologists do these fun studies where they look at people's daily usage patterns. So like how much time are you spending sleeping or exercising or at work or whatever. And the two things that predict whether you're happy or not so happy is how much time you spend with friends and family members. And how much time you're just physically around other people. The more of that you do, the happier you're gonna be."

In a piece on Vox, author and writer Olga Khazan suggests that this might be bad news for some introverts. She notes a few studies on the topic, one which claims that "people who are extroverted as teenagers remain happier even when they’re 60."

It isn't that extroverts are always chattier or more attention-seeking. (As an easily drained extrovert myself, I can tell you that's not true.) It's that their energy is drawn from contact with people. With DOING things. With, that's right…connection.


introversion, reading a book, solitude, alone-time, contentA cartoon sloth reads a book alone.Giphy, GIF by SLOTHILDA

Khazan shares, "Sonja Lyubomirsky, a psychologist who has studied this phenomenon, says it’s worth focusing less on the 'extrovert' part of this and more on the fact that these individuals are more enmeshed in community. Connection is really the key to happiness." Lyubomirsky says there's hope for all. "And there are ways to square your natural introversion with the universal human need for connection. You don’t have to mingle with everyone at the office party, for instance. You can just call a trusted friend for a one-on-one conversation. Even hanging out with others and listening more than you talk can be a form of extroversion."

Grumet suggests ways to step out of one's routine no matter how one gives or receives energy. "Love painting? Join an art group. Passionate about fitness? Start working out with others. Fascinated by a niche topic? Write about it, talk about it, and connect with others who care about it, too."




Joy

Until we meet again: How Hana Hou! became America’s final inflight magazine

“I could make that magazine last for almost my entire flight as I looked through every item and tried to picture the type of person that would buy that stuff.”

Sky-high publications are vanishing.

Glossy pages, local travel tips that get you psyched for your arrival, and sudoku puzzles that bear the wrong answers of past travelers—inflight magazines have been a staple of air travel practically since aviation’s invention. But in today’s increasingly digital world, these sky-high publications have nearly vanished in America, with one notable exception: Hawaiian Airlines’ Hana Hou! magazine, which is now the final printed airline magazine by a major U.S. carrier.

Before that was Hemispheres, the inflight magazine of United Airlines, which, after 32 years, published its final edition in September 2024. Ellen Carpenter, the former editor-in-chief of Hemispheres, told the Columbia Journalism Reviewthat, although the magazine reached 12 to 15 million people per month, print was no longer feasible or a priority for the airline.


Airline, magazine, flying, skies, readershipWe will miss you, airline magazines. Giphy


“As the Internet grows and grows, it’s harder and harder to find curated content,” she explained. Hemispheres marked the latest casualty in what has become a mass extinction of in-flight magazines: once cherished travel companions and information-rich texts are now completely gone from the seatback pockets. Over the past decade, we’ve seen numerous airlines discontinue their print publications, including those from Delta, Alaska, Southwest, and American Airlines, which ended its American Way publication in 2021. This shift is larger than cost-cutting for airlines: it’s the end of a tradition that once united us, strangers, in the sky.

The history

The inflight magazine began, where else, but Pan American Airlines in the 1950s. Commonly known as Pan Am, the airline “epitomized the luxury and glamor of intercontinental travel,” a status reflected in its magazine, Clipper Travel. Although, the golden era of the inflight magazine was arguably in the 1980s, which approximately lines up with or directly after the golden era of journalism. At the most basic level, these free magazines offered small details about the fleeting and sumptuous advertisements for luxury goods. However, they could also be gold mines—bastions of local journalism with a trick up its sleeve. You see, airplane magazines enjoyed the attention of captive audiences with few other means of distraction. As airlines began to see the potential their magazines had to attract business travelers and advertisers, they began heavily investing in these publications, which included offering writers a unique type of freedom not found anywhere else.

American Way, the former in-flight magazine of American Airlines, reached more than 73 million people on planes alone in 1990, according to The Washington Post. Back then, inflight magazines were not merely promotional brochures; they were legitimate publications with the budgets and reach to create content that flyers actually wanted to read.

“It really was a golden age,” said Doug Crichton, editor of American Way from 1988 to 1993. “The airline just said, ‘Do whatever you want.’ …Our goal was to make it a New Yorker of the sky.”

Writers during this time could earn between $1 and $3 per word, with article features commanding a substantial $2,500 (when adjusted for inflation, that equals about $6,000 today). "The airline magazines were really still that bastion of great print journalism where they would say we’re going to send you to Spain, we’re going to send you to Mexico,” said Jenny Adams, a freelance journalist based in New Orleans who wrote for American Way, Hemispheres and other in-flight magazines.

However, as technology advanced, the inflight magazine found itself competing against movie screens, gaming consoles, personal entertainment systems, smartphones, and high-speed Wi-Fi for attention. They began to lose their allure. Then, in 2020, as the COVID-19 pandemic shocked the airline systems, it delivered a final blow as airlines temporarily removed magazines to ensure safety regarding surface transmissions.

Reading, inflight magazine, airlines, flying, covid19Airline magazines have lost their allure. Photo credit: Canva

On Reddit, many users lamented the loss of the inflight magazine, with one writing, “I miss the [American Airlines] magazine. They always did deep dives into interesting locations.”

Another commented, “There was a great interview with Bill Murray in one of the last issues I read. They were always a bit off-beat like that, and I remember thinking ‘I wonder what Bill Murray’s publicist thought when whoever called was like, you know, it’s for the magazines that go on airplanes.’”

Still others missed the SkyMall shopping magazine, writing, “I could make that magazine last for almost my entire flight as I looked through every item and tried to picture the type of person that would buy that stuff.”

Hana Hou!

However, there is one saving grace: Hana Hou! magazine. Published bi-monthly, the Honolulu magazine is still prized for its high-quality journalism and engaging storytelling centered around Hawaiian culture and the islands’ heritage. The magazine, which roughly translates to “Encore!”, has received awards from the Society of Professional Journalists and maintains an extensive archive dating back 20 years.

"Hana Hou! has not only served as an entertainment option but also as a cultural ambassador, connecting travelers to Hawaii," notes Beat of Hawaii. This travel website suggests that readers "might want to pick up a copy of Hana Hou! soon,” because it “might become a valuable collector's item one day."


Indeed, the future of Hana Hou! remains uncertain, with Hawaiian Airlines’ recent acquisition by Alaska Airlines (which previously discontinued its print magazine), so it’s possible that the publication’s days may be numbered. That outcome would be heartbreaking because we’re not just losing magazines, we’re losing a tangible artifact—something that any one of us could pick up while flying, that had the power to connect us, even just for a second. To make us feel human. Inflight travel writer, Jenny Adams, sums it up perfectly: "It's hard now when you're on your phone. You don't have that same connection. It's not tactile. You're not, like, excited to go fly somewhere. I'm just gutted that that's all gone.”

7News Australia/YouTube

The Powers' twins are famous for their unique way of talking as if they're one person

My wife and I like to joke that we know each other so well at this point that it's almost like we share a brain. Having spent so much time together, we can finish each other's sentences and even find ourselves having the same thoughts almost simultaneously. It's common for siblings, family members, and partners to feel like their brains are "in sync" in this way.

But most of us have nothing on an unbelievable set of twins who stumbled into viral fame when a stolen car wrecked near their home and a gun-wielding carjacker stumbled out.

The two sisters who witnessed the incident gave an interview to 7News Australia. Though their story was dramatic, it was the way they told it that made the clip go mega viral.

Throughout the bizarre interview, Bridgette and Paula Powers, who are identical twins, speak almost entirely in unison as they deliver their eyewitness account.

It's truly a sight to behold. At various points in the interview, the sisters finish each other's sentences, speak the same thoughts at the same exact time, and take turns speaking as if they were one single person. They even make the same gestures with their hands and mirror each other's facial expressions.

Lost in the mayhem is the absolutely wild story of the carjacker. If you watch the clip you'll probably find yourself so fascinated by the twins psychic connection that you hardly follow the story at all.

The clip racked up nearly seven million views on X with another 300,000 on YouTube. News outlets all over the world including Entertainment Tonight, Fox News, and Inside Edition each ran features on the web-famous twins.

It's actually not the first time the twins have gone viral for their unique speaking style. They're well known in Australia as the "Twinnies," but are relatively new to the rest of the world.

Viewers and commenters all over the Internet were absolutely stunned in the best way. Not only was the joint-speech a cool "party trick," people were touched by the unimaginable connection the two sisters share.

In a follow up interview with 9 News Australia days later, the twins again dressed and spoke in unison.


- YouTubewww.youtube.com

They clarified that they always do everything together. Being identical twins means they share the exact same DNA. If their DNA is the same and their day to day experiences are almost exactly the same, you can see why they have such a strong connection. It really is like they exist as one person!

Experts say twins don't exactly have a psychic connection, although it can certainly seem like they do. The closer their DNA (exactly the same, in the case of identical twins) and the more shared experiences they have, the more likely it is that they'll have a brain synergy other people can't really comprehend. Many twins actually create their own language, a phenomenon known as cryptophasia. But even when they speak "normally" bystanders often have a hard time understanding twins' conversations because they can't anticipate each other's thoughts and sentences so well, with the conversation devolving into something unintelligible to outsiders.

The Powers sisters insist that their synchronized speaking is not an act. It's something they do together all day every day. And they don't particularly care if anyone believes them, or if people find them annoying. "If you like us, you like us. If you don't, you don't," the sisters say.

When asked if they ever get sick of each other, the answer came easily for both. "No," they said, shaking their head in unison. "We're best of friends."

And further, they're grateful for the attention, though it's not fame they're after. The twins, who are old friends of the late Steve Irwin's, run a rescue for birds and are happy for their cause to get a little extra exposure any way that it can.

Pop Culture

Nicole Kidman shares the unconventional marriage rule she has with husband Keith Urban

They've had this communication rule since the very beginning of their 18 year relationship.

Keith Urban (left) Nicole Kidman (right)

Long before Nicole Kidman began her long-term relationship with AMC theaters, she was committed to husband and country singer Keith Urban. The two have happily been together since 2006—which is a good run for any modern day marriage, but most certainly a Hollywood one.

And perhaps their nearly decades-long success can be partially attributed to one surprising communication rule: no texting. While appearing on the Something To Talk About podcast in 2023, Kidman shared that she was the one who initiated the unconventional agreement.

"We never text each other, can you believe that? We started out that way – I was like, 'If you want to get a hold of me, call me…"I wasn't really a texter.,” the “Moulin Rouge” actress shared.

She added that while Urban did attempt texting her a few items early on, he eventually switched when Kidman wasn’t very responsive. And now, 18 years later, they only call each other.

“We just do voice to voice or skin to skin, as we always say. We talk all the time and we FaceTime but we just don’t text because I feel like texting can be misrepresentative at times…I don’t want that between my lover and I,” she told Parade

.

There are, of course, some pros and cons to calling over texting. Research has shown that people who call feelmore connected to one another vs. texting, with the voice being an integral component of bonding. As our society becomes increasingly more distant and lonely, finding those moments might be more important than ever.

At the same time, calling can invoke a lot more anxiety compared to texting, which could lead someone to not communicating at all. Also, I don’t know about you, but the thought of having to call my partner for mundane things like “don’t forget the eggs” would drive me crazy.

But regardless of whether or not you adopt Kidman and Urban’s no-texting rule, perhaps the bigger takeaway is that relationship longevity depends on being able to establish your own rules. One that feels good and that each partner is able to stick to. Especially when it comes to communication.

As Urban himself told E! News at the CMT Music Awards, "I have no advice for anybody,You guys figure out whatever works for you…We're figuring it out. You figure it out. Everybody's different. There's no one size fits all."

Luckily, there are many ways to have good text hygiene, without having to do away with it completely. Very Well Mind suggests to avoid texting too many questions, and to be respectful of your partner's schedule (probably best to not text them while they’re sleeping just to say “hey,” for example). Nor should texting be used to argue or deal with conflict. Lastly, probably save the lengthy, in-depth conversations for a phone call. Fifteen heart emojis are totally fine though.


This article originally appeared last year.