Heroes
If You’re Afraid Of The Unknown, You’ve Already Lost
National Geographic believes in living a life of curiosity and discovery. Do you?
02.12.13
Family
Two couples move in together with their kids to create one big, loving 'polyfamory'
They are using their unique family arrangement to help people better understand polyamory.
01.25.23
The Hartless and Rodgers families post together
Polyamory, a lifestyle where people have multiple romantic or sexual partners, is more prevalent in America than most people think. According to a study published in Frontiers in Psychology, one in nine Americans have been in a polyamorous relationship, and one in six say they would like to try one.
However popular the idea is, polyamory is misunderstood by a large swath of the public and is often seen as deviant. However, those who practice it view polyamory as a healthy lifestyle with several benefits.
Taya Hartless, 28, and Alysia Rogers, 34, along with their husbands Sean, 46, and Tyler, 35, are in a polyamorous relationship and have no problem sharing their lifestyle with the public on social media. Even though they risk stigmatization for being open about their non-traditional relationships, they are sharing it with the world to make it a safer place for “poly” folks like themselves.
It all began in 2019 when the Oregon couples met in an attempt to add some spice to their sex lives. "None of us had been polyamorous before, but we all just met and fell in love,” Taya said, according to the Mirror. "We didn't even know what polyamory was, until we started getting feelings for each other," Alysia told Today.
"From the first night we met, we all wanted to just see more of each other. It wasn't easy—there was a lot of hesitations around having feelings,” Taya said. "Sean was the first to point it out—he said 'we can't deny this is happening'. We agreed to talk it out to see what the future would look like.
The couple lived two hours from each other, so in February 2020, right before the whole world changed, they moved in together along with Tyler And Alysia’s two children, 7 and 8. “The Quad” as they call themselves came together to create what they call a “polyfamory.”
Although neither Sean and Tyler nor Alysia and Taya are dating one another, they see each other as close partners. The women have their own rooms which the men rotate in and out of each night.
The couples had a direct way of explaining their relationship to their kids. "We told them: 'You know mom has a boyfriend and dad had a girlfriend and we're going to move in together, and we're all going to be a big family and they're going to help parent you, so we're going to need you to treat them like you treat us— like parents,’” Tyler explained.
Since moving in together, both women have had a baby but no one knows for sure who the fathers are. "We did not regulate the biology,” Alysia said. But it doesn’t matter because all four adults share parenting responsibilities.
"At the end of the day, we're just like any other monogamous family—there's just four of us," Tyler says. "Being a parent is so much more than just biology, and that's what we're about."
Taya agrees and says that those who focus on the intimate details of their relationship miss the bigger picture.
"People get so focused on who the biological father of each child is that they don’t consider the benefits of having more loving adults in the child’s life to guide and nurture them," she told Upworthy. "People imagine all the crazy sex we might be having and forget that we’re just people like anyone else. We are a lot more like 'traditional' families than we are different. There’s just more of us."
Taya believes that other poly families who feel stigmatized shouldn't let it get to them.
"My advice would be to live as authentically as they are able and to remember that the opinions of others often have more to do with that person than with you," she told Upworthy.
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Nature
Pennsylvania home is the entrance to a cave that’s been closed for 70 years
You can only access the cave from the basement of the home and it’s open for business.
01.30.23
This Pennsylvania home is the entrance to a cave.
Have you ever seen something in a movie or online and thought, "That's totally fake," only to find out it's absolutely a real thing? That's sort of how this house in Pennsylvania comes across. It just seems too fantastical to be real, and yet somehow it actually exists.
The home sits between Greencastle and Mercersburg, Pennsylvania, and houses a pretty unique public secret. There's a cave in the basement. Not a man cave or a basement that makes you feel like you're in a cave, but an actual cave that you can't get to unless you go through the house.
Turns out the cave was discovered in the 1830s on the land of John Coffey, according to Uncovering PA, but the story of how it was found is unclear. People would climb down into the cave to explore occasionally until the land was leased about 100 years later and a small structure was built over the cave opening.
The idea was to make it accessible to visitors and use the cave as a tourist attraction, and the small structure was eventually built into a two-story house. But it was closed to the public in 1954 after the land was purchased for limestone mining and it remained closed for nearly 70 years. (In the words of Stephanie Tanner, "How rude.") Sometime during that 70-year closure, the home that contains the cave was purchased by Dara Black, and in 2021, it reopened to the public.
Currently, the home is occupied by Black, but to gain access to the cave you can simply book a tour. The best part about booking a tour is that you only have to make a donation to enter. It's a pay-what-you-can sort of setup, but since someone actually lives in the home, you can't just pop in and ask for a tour. You have to go during the "open house" times available.
According to the Black-Coffey Caverns Facebook page, they treat the tours truly as an open house, complete with snacks and drinks. There's a waiting room area where people can chat and eat their snacks while they wait for the tour to start. They also offer cave yoga once a month. According to Uncovering PA, the tour takes about 45 minutes to complete and there are about 3,000 feet worth of passageways.
Imagine living on top of a cave and just taking strangers on a waltz under your floorboards essentially. It makes me wonder if the house is quiet at night or if you can hear echoes of the cave sounds while you're trying to sleep. From the Facebook page, it appears that the cave doesn't have any lights, but there were pictures with some Christmas lights mounted to the cave walls. Otherwise, you have to use flashlights.
Hopefully, no mischievous children decide to play hide and seek or you just might have to call in a rescue crew. Literally. But what an unbelievable "pics or it didn't happen" kind of story to tell. It's not every day you run into someone that has a door that leads you to an underground cave.
If you want to see what a cave tour looks like starting from the outside of the house, check out the video below:
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Family
Dad and daughter relationships, as explained by 10 paintings.
The amazing bond between dads and daughters.
01.26.23
All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.
I have plenty of space.
This article originally appeared on 04.09.16
It's hard to truly describe the amazing bond between dads and their daughters.
Being a dad is an amazing job no matter the gender of the tiny humans we're raising. But there's something unique about the bond between fathers and daughters.
Most dads know what it's like to struggle with braiding hair, but we also know that bonding time provides immense value to our daughters. In fact, studies have shown that women with actively involved fathers are more confident and more successful in school and business.
You know how a picture is worth a thousand words? I'll just let these images sum up the daddy-daughter bond.
A 37-year-old Ukrainian artist affectionately known as Soosh, recently created some ridiculously heartwarming illustrations of the bond between a dad and his daughter, and put them on her Instagram feed. Sadly, her father wasn't involved in her life when she was a kid. But she wants to be sure her 9-year-old son doesn't follow in those footsteps.
"Part of the education for my kiddo who I want to grow up to be a good man is to understand what it's like to be one," Soosh told Upworthy.
There are so many different ways that fathers demonstrate their love for their little girls, and Soosh pretty much nails all of them.
Get ready to run the full gamut of the feels.
1. Dads can do it all. Including hair.
I’ve got this.
All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.
2. They also make pretty great game opponents.
Sharing life strategy.
All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.
3. And the Hula-Hoop skills? Legendary.
Tight fitting hula-hoop.
All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.
4. Dads know there's always time for a tea party regardless of the mountain of work in front of them.
Dad makes time.
All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.
5. And their puppeteer skills totally belong on Broadway.
Let’s play.
All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.
6. Dads help us see the world from different views.
Good shoulders.
All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.
7. So much so that we never want them to leave.
More dad time please.
All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.
8. They can make us feel protected, valued, and loved.
Always the protector.
All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.
9. Especially when there are monsters hiding in places they shouldn't.
Dad is superman.
All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.
Never a big enough bed.
All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.
Seeing the daddy-daughter bond as art perfectly shows how beautiful fatherhood can be.
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Health
All hail the mocktail: Growing demand makes non-alcoholic socializing a lot more fun
Sober bars and events are growing in popularity with delicious, grown-up alternatives to alcohol.
01.30.23
Photo by Blake Wisz on Unsplash
Non-alcoholic drinks go way beyond club sodas and Shirley Temples.
For as long as there's been alcohol, there have been people who don't drink it. Some don't care for the taste, some don't like the buzz, some have religious prohibitions against it and some are recovering addicts who need to avoid it altogether.
Whatever reasons people have for not drinking, there's an unspoken attitude by some that they're missing out on a key part of social culture, especially when countless movies and TV shows portrays people winding down (or wooing one another) with wine and bonding over beers at bars. There's an air of camaraderie over sharing a cocktail or clinking champagne flutes together that's hard to capture with a basic Coke or sparkling water.
But what if you want that fun, social atmosphere without the alcohol? What if you want to go out and have fancy, alcohol-free drinks with your friends at night without being surrounded by drunk people? Where do you go for that?
Big cities like New York and Los Angeles have seen non-alcoholic options increasing on menus for a while, but the trend has spread to smaller cities and expanded to full bars, pop-up events and retail shops dedicated to sober drinking.
In fact, the Mindful Drinking Fest held on January 21 in Washington D.C. was sold out, as over 300 attendees sampled all manner of non-alcoholic beers, wines and mixed drinks. One of the event's organizers, award-winning bartender Derek Brown, told NPR that not drinking isn't actually new. Early bartending manuals all included plenty of non-alcoholic drinks, but post-Prohibition, the temperance movement took a hit. "People stopped treating people who don't drink alcohol like adults," he said.
\u201cThe secret to great non-alcoholic beverage programs: treat people who order NA cocktails like adults. https://t.co/5N4BHhJkAG @AmyZeats @SevenFiftyDaily\u201d— Derek Brown (@Derek Brown) 1674657656
Now temperance appears to be making a comeback with the younger generations of adults. A 2016 Heineken survey discovered that 75% of Millennials purposefully limited their alcohol intake on nights out, and Gen Zers across high-income Western nations are reportedly drinking far less than their elders. According to The Conversation, there's a handful of reasons younger folks are far more "sober curious" than their parents were, including a sense of responsibility about their futures, greater consciousness about wellness, a better understanding of the health risks of even small amounts of alcohol and shifting attitudes about what's cool.
But young folks aren't the only ones hopping on the sobriety train. Even as the pandemic saw a spike in heavy drinking, it also caused a lot of people to examine their relationship with alcohol. With annual traditions like "Dry January" and "Sober October" growing in popularity, people are at least trying out the alcohol-free life for a while—what Brown refers to as an "alcoholiday."
This growing demand for alternatives to alcohol is driving alcohol-free establishments with clever names such as Absence of Proof, Sans Bar, Spirited Away and more to pop up all over the place. And we're not just talking about Shirley Temples or virgin daiquiris here. Today's alcohol-free mixed drinks are far more sophisticated, with new distilled spirits, bitters, and other ingredients creating complex flavors without a sickeningly high sugar content.
Abby Ehmann owned a regular bar in New York and enjoyed her regular customers, but also saw the devasting impacts alcohol had on some of her patrons. So she opened a sober bar named Hekate in 2022. "I wanted to create that sort of vibe and community for people, but take alcohol out of the equation," she told NBC News. "Here we have the community and the vibe without the booze."
The culture around drinking is slowly but surely changing, and the success of events like the Mindful Drinking Fest and sober bars seems to be proving that alcohol isn't the necessary social lubricant many believe it to be.
As Brown told NPR, "All the positive emotions we associate with alcohol—they come from just being with people and tasting delicious, wonderful things," he said. "You don't really need alcohol."
Cheers to that.
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Family
Touching video shows a new father joyfully singing while cradling his baby in the NICU
Seeing the baby raise his little hand moved the father to tears.
01.30.23
@fritojohnson89/TikTok
Little Remington listening to his father sing.
An incredible moment captured between a father and his newborn son has brought viewers to tears.
The viral video shows Daniel Johnson singing the worship song “Hallelujah Here Below” by Elevation Worship as he cradles his preemie son, Remington Hayze, in the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU).
Miraculously, as soon as Johnson begins singing a chorus of “hallelujahs,” Remington’s tiny hand raises as though he were carried away by the music. Seeing this, Johnson is instantly overcome with emotion and can’t finish the song.
The video’s caption explains that little Remington was born four months early and given a 21% chance of survival. He turned 2 1/2 months old the day the video was posted.
Daniel’s wife Emily, who filmed the video, shared with Good Morning America that since being born prematurely at 22 weeks, Remington has received a “variety of treatments for his underdeveloped organs, including steroids for his lungs and shots for his eyes.”
Thanks to the NICU workers at Baylor Scott & White Medical Center in Temple, Texas, Remington’s condition has vastly improved over the past couple of months. He is currently being weaned off of a CPAP machine and no longer needs any medications.
This positive news reflects a recent study from Stanford Medicine, which showed a significant increase in survival rates for preemies born at Remington’s age (22 weeks) who underwent active treatment. For those born at 23 weeks, the survival rate was as high as 55%.
Still, this must be a harrowing experience for any parent going through it, even with the help of dedicated professionals. So for the Johnsons, seeing their son respond to his father’s voice in such a pure way felt like a saving grace.
"It's been an emotional ride and…the video definitely showed how I felt because he's a miracle baby in every sense of the word," Daniel told GMA.
Watch the amazing moment below:
@fritojohnson89 Remington Hayze Johnson. Proof that God is faithful. Born 4 months early and given a 21% chance of survival. Today we are 2 1/2 months old giving God all the praise He deserves. #worship#nicu#nicubaby#dadsinging#elevationworship♬ original sound - Daniel Johnson
Congrats to the Johnson family and their miracle baby. And thank you for sharing this beautiful story with the world.
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Family
Professional tidier Marie Kondo says she's 'kind of given up' after having three kids
Hearing Kondo say, 'My home is messy,' is sparking joy for moms everywhere.
01.30.23
Marie Kondo playing with her daughters.
Marie Kondo's book, "The Life-Changing Art of Tidying Up," has repeatedly made huge waves around the world since it came out in 2010. From eliminating anything that didn't "spark joy" from your house to folding clothes into tiny rectangles and storing them vertically, the KonMari method of maintaining an organized home hit the mark for millions of people. The success of her book even led to two Netflix series.
It also sparked backlash from parents who insisted that keeping a tidy home with children was not so simple. It's one thing to get rid of an old sweater that no longer brings you joy. It's entirely another to toss an old, empty cereal box that sparks zero joy for you, but that your 2-year-old is inexplicably attached to.
To be fair, Kondo never forced her way into anyone's home and made them organize it her way. But also to be fair, she didn't have kids when she wrote her best-selling book on keeping a tidy home. The reality is that keeping a home organized and tidy with children living in it is a whole other ballgame, as Kondo has discovered now that she has three kids of her own.
"My home is messy," she admitted in a recent webinar, according to The Washington Post, "but the way I am spending my time is the right way for me at this time at this stage of my life.”
Despite the Schadenfreude many parents may feel at Kondo's confession that kids change things, her reasoning for letting things go is actually right in line with her philosophy of embracing joy.
“Up until now, I was a professional tidier, so I did my best to keep my home tidy at all times,” she said. “I have kind of given up on that in a good way for me. Now I realize what is important to me is enjoying spending time with my children at home.”
Kondo has offered tips for tidying with kids at home since she became a mom, and they're pretty solid. But as any parent can attest, some children are naturally neater than others, and how many kids you have makes a big difference as well.
Kondo gave birth to her third child in 2021, so she's currently in the adorable hell that is toddlerland. Research has also found that parents of three kids are the most stressed, so if Kondo has found a way to enjoy time with her kids and create more balance in her life by letting go of her tidiness standards, more power to her.
Her new book, "Marie Kondo’s Kurashi at Home: How to Organize Your Space and Achieve Your Ideal Life," focuses on designing your living space so it works for you. "Kurashi" loosely translates to "way of life" or "the ideal way of spending our time," and Kondo says it's about seeing the world through the lens of what matters most.
“I believe that when we consciously cherish something precious, we deepen our relationship with it,” she shares on her website. “This, in turn, deepens our bonds with other things in our lives, bringing out the best in them and in ourselves.”
Applying that philosophy to family, Kondo's "giving up" on tidying all the time makes perfect sense. If spending quality time with your children sparks more joy than keeping your belongings organized just so, then that's what you should do.
Kudos to Kondo for publicly acknowledging that having kids has altered how her home looks and for validating what so many parents have felt in the face of unrealistic expectations of tidiness. She could have kept up a front of always being on top of organization and having a perpetually tidy home, but she didn't. Here's to her willingness to share the reality, here's to embracing joy in the fleeting time we have with our children, and here's to letting go of the rules that might interfere with that, even if it means humbly admitting defeat in the face of our kids' messes.
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