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19 musicals that are not only catchy—they could help with dementia, according to science

Back in 2013, researchers in the U.S. stumbled upon a novel new treatment for dementia patients: listening to show tunes. Seriously.

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Photo by Jordhan Madec on Unsplash

A picture taken of the Broadway street sign in New York City.

Back in 2013, researchers in the U.S. stumbled upon a novel new treatment for dementia patients: listening to show tunes. Seriously.

A study of nursing home patients found that residents who sang show tunes — specifically from "Oklahoma!" "The Wizard of Oz," and "The Sound of Music" — demonstrated increased mental performance, according to a report in the New York Daily News:

"Researchers working with elderly residents at an East Coast care home found in a four-month long study ... that people who sang their favorite songs showed a marked improvement compared to those who just listened."

A similar study in Finland, cited in The Guardian, demonstrated that singing not only helped dementia patients feel better and focus, but actually improved certain types of memory as well.

Even better? There are tons of classic show tunes specifically about remembering.

Here are 23 tunes every Broadway fan needs to memorize for the day when it's not so easy to remember. It'll help to start brushing up now.

1. The one about remembering the good old days.

"Those Were the Good Old Days," "Damn Yankees"

If you're the devil in "Damn Yankees," that means the Great Depression, the Black Plague years, and when Jack the Ripper was running around. Good times!

2. The one about remembering a parade that probably never happened.

Any playlist of show tunes about memory has to include this standard from "The Music Man," in which Professor Harold Hill remembers the best day of his life, when "Gilmore, Liberati, Pat Conway, The Great Creatore, W.C. Handy, and John Phillip Sousa all came to town."

Whether or not any of it actually happened is ... up for debate, to put it mildly.

3. The one about remembering a really fun trip you took to a medium-sized Midwestern city.

"Kansas City," "Oklahoma"

"Oklahoma's" Will Parker is so psyched about his Kansas City vacation he can't help bragging about it to all the other cowboys. And why not? It's a neat city! Have you been to Joe's Kansas City Barbecue? Neither has Will Parker, since he was there in 1906, but you should totally go.

4. The one about remembering how fun it was to murder that guy that one time...

"Cell Block Tango," "Chicago"

...while glancing nervously over your shoulder to make sure Queen Latifah isn't around.

5. The one about remembering the questionable choices it's too late to go back in time and not make.

"Where Did We Go Right?" from "The Producers"

Looking back doesn't always go well for characters in musicals. It definitely doesn't for "The Producers'" Bialystock and Bloom, as they tear around their office wondering how their incompetently directed, poorly acted, aggressively pro-Hitler musical wound up becoming a massive hit despite their every attempt to make it fail.

6. The one about remembering the little things.

"I Remember/Stranger Than You Dreamt It," "Phantom of the Opera"

Perhaps the greatest testament to how emotionally transporting "Phantom of the Opera" is: Christine, removing the phantom's mask for the first time, can just straight-up claim to remember mist — like, one mist in particular — and no one calls her on it ever.

7. The one about remembering the worst day of your life.

"The Barber and his Wife," "Sweeney Todd"

No character in musical theater is more nostalgic than Sweeney Todd, who, just moments after we meet him, croons this delightful ditty reminiscing about the time he was framed for a crime he didn't commit and banished from England so that an evil judge could rape his wife who subsequently poisoned herself.

A tune you can hum!

8. The one about remembering things differently than everyone else around you.

"Satisfied," "Hamilton"

Not sure if you've heard, but "Hamilton" is good, you guys.

After Alex and Eliza Schuyler meet and fall in love in "Helpless," Angelica Schuyler basically goes "Wicked" on her sister's song, recalling how agonizing it was watching her sister and the man who she herself is super into get together. But she sucks it up and buries it! Older siblings are the best.

9. The one about remembering that cute girl you just met like five seconds ago.

"Maria," "West Side Story"

A classic from "West Side Story." Sure, it's about remembering a meet-cute that literally just happened — Tony and Maria's orchestral-swell-assisted gaze across a crowded gym — but Tony is super jazzed about it, so it makes the list.

Gosh, I sure hope those crazy kids work out!

10. The one about remembering all the worst things from when you were a kid, and one kind-of-OK thing.

"At the Ballet," "A Chorus Line"

The ballet isn't that great, but it's better than devastating childhood trauma. Score one for the ballet! Thanks, "A Chorus Line!"

11. The one about remembering old hobbies.

"Dentist!" from "Little Shop of Horrors"

"Little Shop of Horrors'" Orin Scrivello, DDS, is just misunderstood. I mean, who among us didn't "shoot puppies," "poison guppies," or "take a pussycat and bash in its head" now and again as a kid? The '50s were a simpler time!

12. The one about remembering watching a dude die on the battlefield and feeling feelings about it.

"Momma Look Sharp," "1776"

47 years before "Hamilton" brought us the swaggery, ass-kicking side of the Revolutionary War, "1776" tore our guts out with this song, in which a courier to the Continental Congress recalls watching a mother comfort a young soldier as he dies at the battles of Lexington and Concord.

Hercules Mulligan does the guest rap. (Just kidding. There is no guest rap. It's just gorgeously somber for a while and then over.)

13. The one about remembering the best four years of your life.

"I Wish I Could Go Back to College," "Avenue Q"

Of course the sad-sack puppet man- and woman-children of "Avenue Q" want to go back to college! Who among us doesn't long for the days of term papers, humiliating romantic encounters, and crushing, debilitating debt? And meal-plan ice cream, too!

14. The one about remembering some A-plus advice from your best friend.

"Cabaret," "Cabaret"

Ladies and gentlemen, Sally Bowles from "Cabaret" is no fool! No matter how many lovers leave, or how much her career nosedives, or how nutty local politics get, she always remembers this important life lesson she learned from her good friend Elsie.

If only you had such a great, wise friend, maybe your outlook would be as good as Sally's. You could be so lucky!

15. The one about remembering last Christmas.

"Halloween," "Rent"

When it comes to the science of memory and cognition, "Rent" asks the big questions:

"Why are entire years strewn on the cutting room floor of memories? When single frames from one magic night forever flicker in close-up on the 3-D Imax of my mind?"

Poetic? Pathetic? We report, you decide.

16. The one about remembering everything and realizing how terrible it all was.

"Rose's Turn," "Gypsy"

Ah, yes. "Rose's Turn." The 11 o'clock number to end all 11 o'clock numbers in "Gypsy," the most musical of all musicals. Truly, there aren't many things more enjoyable than listening to Mama Rose replay the events of the last decade and change inside her own brain in a slow-motion nervous breakdown as the notion that her entire life has been completely worthless gradually dawns on her with ever-increasing dread.

Did I mention how fun musicals are?

Trivia time! You know that thing in music where trumpets go, "Ya da da da daaaa DA. Da DA da DA!" You know that thing? This is the song that thing comes from.

17. The one about remembering the first time you knew what you wanted to be when you grew up.

"Ring of Keys," "Fun Home"

There's nothing better than a song that makes you want to shout: "I am so glad I'm watching a musical instead of a basketball game right now." This moment in "Fun Home," where Alison recalls seeing a delivery woman — the first person who looked like the woman she felt like — is really, really one of them.

"This is a song of identification that is a turning moment, when you think you’re an alien and you hear someone else say, 'Oh, me too,'" composer Jeanine Tesori told Variety. "It’s a gamechanger for Alison. And that’s just Musical Theater 101."

...And the entire audience bursts into happy tears forever.

18. The one about remembering a nice dream you dreamed.

"I Dreamed a Dream," "Les Misérables"

When your life isn't going so great, it's good to remember the positive! Things didn't exactly go super well for Fantine in "Les Mis." But, hey, she had a pretty good dream once!

19. The one about remembering your single greatest regret and vowing to never remember it again.

"Turn It Off," "The Book of Mormon"

What's the ticket to living as fun-loving and guilelessly as the Mormon elders in "The Book of Mormon?" Don't just bury those traumatic, scary, impure memories — CRUSH THEM, OK?!

20. The one about remembering a really successful first date.

"Sarah Brown Eyes," "Ragtime"

Ah, young love. Even in "Ragtime," a musical that features racism, state violence, attempted child murder, and terrorism, at least we have this song, in which Coalhouse Walker Jr. recalls how he got his beloved Sarah to fall truly, madly, deeply in love with him with his peerless piano skills? So romantic.

Gosh, I sure hope those crazy kids work out!

21. The one about remembering a scary dream.

"Sit Down, You're Rockin' the Boat," "Guys and Dolls"

With, perhaps, only a smidge more credibility than grifter-from-another-mother Professor Harold Hill, "Guys and Dolls'" third-most-degenerate gambler Nicely-Nicely Johnson recalls a terrifying dream where he had to convince a group of skeptical evangelical crusaders that he's decided to give up the dice once and for all.

Side note: People in musicals are unbelievably good at remembering dreams. This is, like, full detail. I'd be like, "Um, I was at the Statue of Liberty, and you were there? I think? It wasn't really you, it was like a combination of you and my dad. And we were in prison. But at the Statue of Liberty."

22. The one about remembering how it used to be when you were young and full of hope instead of old and bitter and jaded.

"Our Time," "Merrily We Roll Along"

The closing number of "Merrily We Roll Along" is actually the first chronologically, since the musical goes backward. It's the play's happiest moment — Frank, Charley, and Mary on a roof watching Sputnik go by, giddily talking about how thrilling, perfect, and successful their futures are going to be. It's so hopeful! But so sad, 'cause you already know all the achingly bittersweet stuff that's going to happen.

Ach! So poignant! I'm dead from poignant.

23. The one about remembering.

"Memory," "Cats"

"Cats." The OG.

All right team, what did I miss?

This article originally appeared on 02.26.16

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34 broken bones, a mural, and Buddy the Elf—what these three things have in common

"I never thought I’d run again. But against the odds, here I am."

34 broken bones, a mural, and Buddy the Elf—what these three things have in common
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The Bank of America Chicago Marathon took place on Sunday, October 12th. Every runner who took on the enormous feat of 26.2 miles is truly an inspiration. We’re proud to share three outstanding stories about the power of community, giving back and crossing the finish line. Not only did they run an outstanding distance, but they each also gave back by fundraising for an organization that changes lives for the better.

Running a marathon is so much more than race day. It’s sticking to a schedule, getting enough rest, learning how to fuel your body for long distances, and—perhaps the most challenging of all—building mental resilience.


Meet Leanne: Running after 34 Bone Fractures

Leanne was only 12 years old when during her middle school cross country practice, she fractured her right tibia, the shin bone in her leg. This wasn’t Leanne’s first time breaking a bone—it was actually her 34th fracture. After many years of being overlooked as "clumsy," Leanne felt immense relief and recognition when a doctor diagnosed her with brittle bone disease, an incredibly rare condition.

Lurie Children’s provided a care plan for Leanne to build strength and start running again. And as of October 12th, Leanne ran her second Bank of America Chicago Marathon. She said in an interview, “I never thought I’d run again. But against the odds, here I am, training for my second Bank of America Chicago Marathon... all because of Lurie Children’s.”

Leanne’s impressive journey is a testament to the incredible research of Lurie Children’s, where she gives back by volunteering at the hospital and running on its behalf. Talk about being a true inspiration.


Meet Everett: Running to Inspire Through Art

Everett is an artist who creates beautiful murals around the city of Chicago. He uses his art as a tool for storytelling for community and connection.

In addition to being an artist, Everett is a runner. He ran the 2025 Bank of America Chicago Marathon on behalf of Peace Runners 773, a non-profit organization that strengthens the community of Chicago. In this video, we follow Everett on a run to visit some of his favorite murals. The run ends at Garfield Park, where Everett just finished a mural that he dedicated to the organization—symbolizing growth, strength and togetherness. Everett didn’t stop there.

While building his strength as a runner, Everett is strengthening his city of Chicago. Through his running and artwork, Everett has brought more awareness and resources to his community.

Meet Joseph: Running on Behalf of Special Olympics


Joseph ran the Chicago Marathon on behalf of Special Olympics, dedicating each mile to one of 26 friends with a developmental disability. The last 1.2 miles were extra special. It was for one of his closest friends, Matt.

In this video, Joseph runs to Matt’s house. For every mile of this training run, he tells us a heartwarming anecdote about Matt. They met at camp and soon, Matt will be a groomsman in Joseph’s wedding. The duo even sends a Christmas card every year—most notably dressing up as Buddy the Elf and sharing a bowl of spaghetti with maple syrup (spoiler: it doesn’t taste good).

As Joseph runs, he says, “Before we get to Matt, a quick note about why I’m running on behalf of Special Olympics. Matt and I love sports. And so do many of my other friends. Donations help provide year-round sports training and competition for more than 20,000 people with intellectual disabilities across Illinois.”

Joseph is the perfect example of inspiration. Not only did he run an entire marathon, but he also found inspiration in his friends who love sports as much as he does.


Leanne, Everett and Joseph are three incredible people who have shown how much strength and perseverance it takes to run a marathon. Each runner is both empowering themselves and their community. Their dedication to the Bank of America Chicago Marathon shows that the people of Chicago have a passion for the city, their neighbors and their personal achievements.

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Gen Xers share 17 nostalgic dishes they ate growing up—and still make for dinner

From sloppy joes to pizza bread, these dishes still slap.

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Image via Reddit

A family enjoys dinner during the 1970s.

Generation X (those born between 1965-1980) grew up eating classic Americana meals. During the 1970s, comfort meals like tuna casserole and salmon roquettes were popular meals.

Gen X also grew up eating some pretty unhinged (but all the more yummy) sandwiches. These meals are steeped in childhood nostalgia.

And to this day, Gen Xers are still fond of their favorite dishes they grew up eating. Together, they discussed on Reddit their most-loved home-cooked dishes that they still whip up, starting with sloppy joes.

Here are 17 iconic Gen X comfort meals to keep in mind the next time you make dinner:


@genx_shawn

🤤😂 Top 10 Things ONLY GenX Knows the Taste Of... #genx #over50club #genxtiktok #over40 #genxcrew #generationx #genxers #genxtok #over40club #over50

"Breakfast. We will have a 'breakfast for dinner' at least a couple times a month. Yum!" - fadeanddecayed, KddKc

"Pizza bread! My mom would cut Italian bread into pieces, put butter and garlic salt on them, then pour some spaghetti sauce on them, cover with mozzarella cheese, and broil for like ten or fifteen minutes. Super easy and quick to make and so tasty. I'm sure my mom loved that I was so into something that took roughly zero effort for her to make." - hornybutired

"Grilled cheese and soup." - reincarnateme

"Meat loaf. I use 2 pounds ground beef, replace bread crumbs with minute rice, add 1 pkg beef soup flavoring, chop an entire onion for it, and mix BBQ sauce into mixture. Oh, important: do not overmix! Place all ingredients into bowl, then mix quickly 10 or 12 swirls of a large spoon. Grease loaf pan, carefully place mixture in, pat down & bake about an hour. (Extra info: for even better flavor, mix the night before, pat into loaf pan, cover with plastic, put into fridge overnight. Remove from fridge about an hour before baking. BE SURE TO REMOVE PLASTIC WRAP! [Esp. If in Pyrex glass loaf pan])" - jehardt, AbbyM1968

"White guy tacos." - najing_ftw

"Skillet dinner. Kielbasa, bell pepper, onion, spuds in a cast iron pan. One dish. Easy peasy." - UnimportantOutcome67

- YouTube www.youtube.com

"Chicken pot pie or chicken ala king." - sattersnaps

"Fried catfish, greens, and red beans and rice." - User Unknown

"Shepherds pie, technically cottage pie if it’s ground beef. Homemade enchiladas, usually made as a layered casserole instead because I don’t have time to roll them. Pork chops with mashed potatoes and veggies." - XerTrekker

"Fried rice with chicken or pork leftovers." - AlternativeResort181

"Hot hamburgers: hamburger patty open face on Texas toast thickness bread, cover with fries then cover that with brown gravy. Wife's variation is hamburger patty over rice with brown gravy." - EnricoMatassaEsq

@past_archives

American Gen X Foods That Kids Today Can’t Understand#nostalgia #childhoodmemories #backtochildhood #90s #2000s #usa #80s #90skids #80schildhood #capcutforus #capcut #capcutpioneer #America

"Stuffed peppers. I make it much more easily by cooking it all in one large frying pan 'deconstructed'. Sauté onions garlic and ground beef, add cut up peppers, tomatoes or tomato sauce, sometimes a little spinach, then add separately cooked rice, salt and pepper and serve. It comes together pretty quickly and tastes just as good as stuffing and baking peppers in the oven." - Affectionate-Map2583

"Macaroni and cheese with cut up hot dogs. Seriously, that’s what I ate tonight." - Dazzling-Walrus9673

"Homemade Stroganoff casserole. Ridiculously easy to make. Ingredients:

1.25-1.5 lbs. Ground Beef
1 each of large white onion, green pepper, and red pepper
1 can mushroom pieces, drained and rinsed
12 oz. Bag of wide egg noodles
1 can cream of mushroom soup
16 oz. Sour cream
Worcestershire Sauce
Louisiana Hot Sauce
White or Black Pepper
Panko bread crumbs

To Make: Preheat oven to 360 degrees. Worcestershire, hot sauce, garlic powder, and pepper are all to taste, depending on how much flavor and punch you want it to have. Cook noodles per instructions. Drain. Peel and slice onion (not diced), core and cut peppers into strips Brown meat, onions and peppers along with liberal amount of Worcestershire; garlic, pepper, and hot sauce. Add mushrooms. Cook until meat is fully brown, onions are translucent and peppers are tender. Drain. Combine drained meat, etc. with whole can of soup, half of the sour cream. Gradually add noodles into the mix. Add sour cream as needed to maintain consistency. Add Worcestershire, hot sauce, and pepper to taste. Dump into large, deep Corning dish or whatever. Cover too with bread crumbs. Cover and bake for forty minutes." - CynfullyDelicious

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Couple retires to live on cruise ships because it's roughly half the cost of a nursing home

"We just walked away from everything."

cruise ships, cruise living, vacation, lifestyle, alternative living, alternative lifestyles, aging, seniors
via Alonso Reyes/Unsplash

A couple lives permanently on cruise ships instead of paying for assisted living.

It comes as no surprise to many of us, but cost of living in the United States has gone up so by leaps and bounds in recent years. So much so that living on a cruise ship has become a reasonable idea for some retirees. When Nancy and Robert Houchens of Charlottesville, Virginia, retired, they decided to sell almost everything they had and live out their golden years hopping from cruise ship to cruise ship.

"We had a 3,000-square-foot home full of furniture...and everything we own now would fit in the back of a pickup truck," Robert told USA Today.

“We sold all of our estates except for a little condominium we have in Florida, so when we get too old to cruise, we have somewhere to live,” Nancy added. “And we did keep two vehicles, and what we kept is in half of (Robert's mother's storage unit), which is, I don't know, 10x10 or something. We just walked away from everything.”

Life on a cruise ship is stress-free for the couple because their needs are taken care of on the ship. "It's been great. I don't cook. I don't clean," Nancy told the Miami Herald.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

The couple has found that living on a cruise ship isn’t as expensive as some may assume. Even though inflation has driven up the cost of travel in the U.S., it hasn’t significantly impacted the cruise industry.

“It's much cheaper than a nursing home or assisted living. It was just a good fit for us. It's a good fit for a lot of people,” Robert told the Miami Herald.

The cost of a nursing home for one person usually runs anywhere from $8-10,000 per month, for reference.

The couple plans their trips differently than someone who is going on vacation. “We look for the best deal, not the destination,” Nancy told Cruise Passenger.

The couple initially planned to spend $4,000 a month living on the ships. “Our original budget was $4,000 a month. This included gratuities. Of course, things are more expensive now, so that budget has had to increase a little. Depending on where we go, we may or may not need the internet,” she told Cruise Passenger.

cruise ships, cruise living, vacation, lifestyle, alternative living, alternative lifestyles, aging, seniors Literally sailing off into the sunset. Giphy

“Our phone plan covers most everywhere for 25 cents a minute to call with free internet and texting,” Nancy continued. “We have an annual travel insurance plan, and one of our credit cards also has travel insurance.”

The roughly $4,000 the couple spends a month includes food, and they don’t have to bother paying for a car. They also try to book their cruises consecutively so they don’t waste money paying for expensive hotels when transferring between cruise lines.

Not a bad deal.

Last July, the Houchens celebrated their 1,000th day sailing with Carnival Cruise Line since the 1980s, and they look forward to countless more days at sea with each other and the new friends they’ve made on their never-ending cruise. And today, they're still going strong.

They're not alone in loving their new lifestyle. CBS News reports in 2025 that "cruise retirements" are more popular than ever.

@lovepeacecruise

Nancy and Robert Houchens of Charlottesville, Virginia - Couple retires to live on cruise ships because it's 'cheaper than a nursing home' #livingonacruiseship #retirement #carnival #carnivalcruise #funship #carnivalship #carnivalshiptok #cruiseship #cruise #cruiser #cruiselife #vacation #travel #cruisevacation #cruisetravel #cruisetok #cruisetiktok #cruiseaddict

“We cruise Carnival because of the people,” Richard told Travel Pulse. “It isn’t the destinations for us anymore, it’s the journey—and the biggest part of the journey is the people.”

This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.

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4 everyday phrases that may indicate someone is highly intelligent

It's time to rethink what we consider to be "smart."

intelligence, Einstein, change, openness, art
Photo by Taton Moïse on Unsplash

Einstein in a hoodie on a mural.

So often, we equate intelligence with standardized testing, or say, degrees or rank in a graduating class. The person who has a 4.0 GPA and high SAT score probably is pretty book-smart. And sure, various amounts of degrees do imply that most likely they've had a lot of education.

But there is another measure of intelligence that is often overlooked: the ability to be wrong. A doctor named Emma Jones, MD (self-described hospice doctor and "burnout coach") has recently gone viral on social media for a video wherein she talks about intelligence. The clip is entitled "Here's how you know someone is highly intelligent." In just a couple of minutes, she lays out ways you can easily spot someone who is ultra-bright.

Quoting Oscar Wilde, she says, "Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative." She then explains that he meant, "highly intelligent people know how to change their minds."

Here's where the phrases of (most likely) highly intelligent people come in. She says to listen for sentences like:

"I used to think…"

"That's a good point."

"Let me reconsider."

"I've changed my mind."

She adds, "Most people double down to protect their ego. But intelligent people update their beliefs. They get more curious instead of more defensive. And they ask things like 'what am I missing?' instead of trying to win an argument. They don't tie their identity to being 'right.' And they treat being wrong like data, not humiliation."

She also quotes Albert Einstein, who once said, "The measure of intelligence is the ability to change." She notes that the "real flex" is being able to have your mind changed "without shame."

The comments, and there are thousands in just a short amount of time, support the notion. One (somewhat sarcastically) writes, "So in other words, you’re saying that intelligence correlates with a combination of critical thinking skills and the humility to know that oneself doesn’t know everything?"

Another jokes, "I used to say that my 'need to be right' is so strong that if someone shows me a better path, or shows me that my thinking is off, I will quickly recalibrate and change my mind so I can be 'right' again." Jones responds to this: "That is quite a strong and intelligent reframe."

Another Instagrammer backs it up with a book they love, writing, "One of the best books I have ever read is called But What If We're Wrong by Chuck Klosterman. I base most of my life on the assumption that some part of the system is built on inherently incorrect information. It makes it easier to be flexible and make connections to other information that may have otherwise been missed."

But, of course, admitting there's usually room for debate and the ability to change one's mind is just one of many signs someone is intelligent. Writer and reviewer Jordan Cooper shared his subtle signs someone might be intelligent in an article for VegOut.

Among eight examples, his first is "talking to yourself out loud," which I mentioned in a recent Upworthy article. He adds, "A 2012 study in the Quarterly Journal of Experimental Psychology showed that talking out loud can actually improve focus and object recognition. Why? Because verbalizing engages additional sensory channels. When you speak your thoughts aloud, you’re not just thinking—you’re hearing yourself think, which reinforces memory and decision-making. Einstein did it. So do a ton of high-performers who swear by this trick for brainstorming, debugging their code, or preparing for presentations."

richard pryor, intelligence, openness, being wrong Richard Pryor admits he was wrong. Giphy

Other examples, some of which have also been pointed out on Upworthy over the years, are: "zoning out," "being sensitive to noise, light or texture," "having messy handwriting," "swearing a lot," and to the earlier point, "doubting your intelligence constantly." (In other words, staying open to being wrong.)

So, while having good grades and a plethora of degrees is excellent, always being open to learning and changing course adds a layer to any good mind.


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Social skills expert shares 3 'magic phrases' that make you more likable

Sometimes, we need to overcommunicate how we feel about others.

vanessa van edwards, likability, communications skills, people skills, people laughing, good advice
via Press Release and Canva/Photos

Vanessa Van Edwards and people at a party.

A familiar misstep people make when trying to be likable is trying to impress others. They want to show they are funny, intelligent, and a great storyteller. They think being the life of the party is the road to likability. However, study after study shows that it’s a lot easier to be likable. All you have to do is show interest in others. To put it simply: If you like people, you will become more likable.

There’s a slight wrinkle in the notion that liking more people makes you more likable. Many people you like aren’t sure that you like them. The psychological phenomenon known as signal amplification bias says it best. We tend to overestimate how clearly we broadcast our feelings and intentions towards others. So, the person we like and who likes us may not know the feeling is mutual.

“We think our signals are obvious,” Vanessa Van Edwards told Steve Bartlett on the Diary of a CEO podcast. “If we like someone or if we’re having a good time, we think, ‘Oh, they for sure know it.’ They don’t.” Van Edwards is a communications expert and the author of Captivate: The Science of Succeeding with People.

To help people clearly communicate their feelings, Van Edwards suggests three “magic phrases” to show you care. Check out the video below.


Phrase 1: ‘I was just thinking of you’

“You think of a lot of people in your life all the time,” she said. “If you are thinking of someone and you can text them: ‘I was just thinking of you, how are you?’ I was just thinking of you, how’d that project go?’ was just thinking of you. It has been a while since we talked.’ You see a movie, you see a documentary, you see a matcha latte, you see a mug, you see a ceramic candle, and you’re like, ‘Ah, this made me think of you,’” Van Edwards said. “My text messages, my conversations, are full of actual moments where I was triggered to think of that person, actually,” she said, noting the importance of being genuine. “If you don’t think of someone, they’re not a person you need to have in your life.”


Phrase 2: ‘You’re always so …’

"So if you're with someone and you're impressed by them or they're interesting or they're funny, say, 'You always make me laugh. You’re always so interesting,’ or ‘You’re always so great in interviews.' Giving them a label that is a positive label is the best gift you can give someone, because it's fighting that signal amplification bias,” she continued.


Phrase 3: ‘Last time we talked, you mentioned …’

“We are so honored when we get brain space—that you remembered and you’re going to bring it up,” she said. “And you specifically bring up something that they lit up with, something they were like, ‘Ah, it was great, it was exciting, it was wonderful.’”


If studies show the more you like other people, the more likable you become, Van Edwards has the next logical step in becoming more likable. She makes it clear that, due to signal amplification bias, many people you like may not even know it. When we employ her three ways to be more likeable, though, we can let people know we like them without making them feel uncomfortable, thus establishing bond to build on.

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Gen Xers and Boomers share ‘grimy’ parts of the 70s they were happy to leave behind

Such a good reminder of the progress we’ve made in the past 50 years.

Times square, 42nd street and 7th ave, new york city, NYC, 1970s
Dan McCoy/Wikimedia Commons

Times Square in 1973 was pretty "sleazy."

When people talk about the world older generations grew up in, it's often looked at through the rose-colored glasses of nostalgia. Life was simpler back then. We didn't have all the trappings of technology or the burdens of busy modern life. Sure, we had to do more things manually, but the world was safer and cleaner and generally better back then, right?

Not so fast. As some of the younger generations have noticed, the 1970s is often spoken about with nostalgic fondness but portrayed differently in entertainment. That observation led someone to ask Gen Xers and Boomers, "Were the 1970s really as grimy and gloomy and sleazy as the movies make it look?" Surprisingly, folks who lived through the '70s took off their rose-colored glasses to remind us all of how far we've actually come in the past 50 years.

While "grimy" and "gloomy" and "sleazy" may be strong terms, they're not entirely inaccurate, according to the older folks who responded to the question. Of course, some places had more problems than others and big cities had it the worst, but some of the "grime" was widespread. Here are the truths behind the film portrayals:

Smog in Los Angeles

While L.A. still struggles with air quality, it has seen a vast, visible improvement since the days of thick, brown smog hovering over the city and people mistaking it for a gas attack.

"I lived in Los Angeles as a kid, and it wasn't unusual to have days we weren't allowed to go outside at school because the smog was so bad it literally hurt to breathe."

"A old joke that probably doesn't make sense nowadays: 'What do you see in California when the smog lifts? UCLA.'"

"We called them Smog alerts. We couldn’t go out for recess on those days."

"The mountains were mythical, growing up in L.A. On the occasional clear day you’d hear people saying, 'Wait, those are there all the time?' Thank goodness for better emissions control."

Air and water pollution in general

The Environmental Protection Agency was begun under President Nixon in 1970, and it would take awhile for the new department to get established and policies to take hold.

"Yes. 60’s and 70’s every major American city had days where there was really low visibility, distant landmarks obscured, brown, white, rusty, hazy cast and layers. Car, truck and bus exhaust pollution. In some areas, strong chemical and odors fr factories and animal processing plants. In the winter you could taste the sulfur in the air from some smaller city power stations burning coal. Flying into some cities was a descent from clean air into a dark brown layer of pollution."

"Bad enough that the EPA was born at that time; Woodsy Owl, the 'Give a Hoot, Don't Pollute' mascot was born; the Crying Indian commercial was first broadcast; the Clean Water Act was amended (originally from 1948 and called Federal Water Pollution Control Act).

We lived near a refinery town in the 60s and 70s. Gawd, I had asthma and was constantly having to go to the hospital, to the point the doctors told my parents to keep me inside. Or course, them being smokers made it pretty much from the frying pan to the fire.

The 70s were the years of introducing environmental awareness to a population that was coughing, hacking and used to brown air."

"That was when people finally said 'Wait, you mean rivers aren't supposed to catch fire when a train passes by and some sparks fly off the rail?' and 'What do you mean they're actually supposed to have flowing water in them, instead of oozing sludge?'"

Littering was commonplace

It might be hard to imagine now, but it was totally normal in certain eras to just throw your trash out the window of your car or leave your bottles or cans wherever you finished them.

1977 TV public service announcement www.youtube.com

"I think everyone kinda forgets how much trash there was. My generation grew up with the crying Indian and 'give a hoot, don't pollute.' Before that, people really did just throw their trash out the car windows. There was a LOT more trash on the roads."

"We used to make a fair bit of money picking up aluminum cans, and smashing them to sell for scrap. Loads of them."

"It was quite common for people to throw trash out of their cars. beer bottles by the side of the road. In the late 1970s, Michigan voted in bottle deposits, and afterwards there was quite a difference in the roadside as you crossed the Ohio border in I-75. With the deposits, there was more incentive to pick them up, too, because each one was worth a dime. Didn't take too many to pay for a $1 movie that had already been in the big theaters for a month or two."

"Recycling was pretty much non-existent. It seemed that people burned trash a lot more commonly, as well."

"There's a scene in Mad Men where they have a picnic and Don casually pitches his beer can into the woods. It used to be like that."

Times Square was NSFW

If people think Times Square is tacky now, with all of its flashy billboards, it's a far cry from the "sleazy" strip it used to be.

Times square, 42nd street and 7th ave, new york city, NYC, 1970s A photo near Times Square from 1973.Dan McCoy/Wikimedia Commons

"That Times Square scene in Taxi Driver was Cinema Verite, it was exactly like that."

"Yeah, I used to have to travel to New York in the late ‘70s. The sleaze factor around Times Square was significant."

"Times Square was full of porn theaters and you didn’t go to what is now the High Line neighborhood unless you wanted hookers and blow."

"First time I went to NYC as a kid in like 1994 I remember a ton of porn theaters. They must have cleaned them all up within a few years, because I never saw them again on later visits."

People smoked everywhere

"Everyone smoked. Everyone and everywhere. I can’t believe we all don’t have lung cancer. Even us nonsmokers."

"Restaurants and Bars were smoky greasy and pretty grimy. It had to be a really nice place to smell fresh. The lighting was terrible. Most places had terrible air circulation. Everywhere reeked of cigarette, pipe and cigar smoke. Food odors. Old grease."

"Grimy? Yes. People smoked in their offices. After hours outside in the unemployment line, get to stand in line an oxygen free smoke filled enclosed sea of humanity with one bathroom to be insulted by cranky civil servants. Seems every building had cigarette and cigar tar wall and ceiling coatings."

Were there a lot of great things about the 1970s? Of course. There's a lot that we can take from every decade that was positive, including the one we are living through now. But this reflection on the less-than-stellar elements of the '70s and the big improvements we've made since then on all of these fronts should give us hope that we are capable of collectively moving in the right direction.

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