Ask anyone Millennial and younger what the scariest sound in the world is, and you'll get some interesting answers. Your phone buzzing with an actual, honest-to-God phone call would be one. Someone unexpectedly knocking on your door would be the other. For many of us, when we look out the window and see someone we don't recognize approaching our house, the instinct is to pretend we're not home.
Door-to-door salesmen and solicitors are still shockingly common, and the only thing worse than an unexpected knock from a stranger is that same stranger being a pushy and aggressive salesman who won't take No for an answer! So staying quiet and waiting for them to leave seems like a reasonable strategy to avoid anxiety and conflict.
A police officer on TikTok just issued a word of caution for us introverts who like to hide out from knocking strangers: "Don't do that."
Officer Randall Arsenault, a former policeman from Canada and a super popular TikTok creator, shared the warning in a recently reposted video.
"Somebody comes to your home during the day, knocks on the door, rings the doorbell, and you don't answer because you don't want to be bothered? Don't do that, OK?"
"Two minutes later, they kick in your door, it's a daytime break and enter, happens all the time. ... They get inside your house, they panic, not expect anybody to be there, bad things can happen."
It's sound advice. Most home intruders, believe it or not, aren't looking to hurt anyone and would rather avoid a potentially violent confrontation. They'd much prefer an easy chance to walk around and take what they want. So by pretending to not be home, you actually make yourself a perfect target.
@officerarsenault WARNING! Extremely important message. #onthisday
Which... is a total bummer if you get knock-anxiety.
"Ugh this is an introverts worst fear. Having to interact with people when they don’t want to," wrote one commenter.
So what should you do instead?
"Yell through, wave them off through the window, act like you're on your cell phone already," Officer Arsenault says.
In other words, alert them to your presence in any way that you can! That doesn't mean you fling the door open and invite them in. But making noise or even speaking to them through the closed and locked door are good ideas. Some people who are home alone will even pretend to speak (loudly) with a spouse, partner, or friend who's not actually there. Call for your "dad" or "husband" to come over, and that's often enough to spook low-level burglars.
Chances are, the person knocking is just a salesman or doing some political canvassing. But handling those unexpected knocks the right way could be a legitimate lifesaver.
A recent survey by YouGov found that less than half of Americans are willing to answer the door when a stranger knocks. Over a third will ignore them, and another 17% aren't sure.
Mario Heller/Unsplash
The dividing lines among generations were fascinating in the study.
Less than 10% of Baby Boomers reported feeling afraid when receiving unexpected knocks (though they were high on annoyance, to no one's surprise — I'm pretty sure they invented the No Soliciting sign).
15% of Millennials said they felt afraid when someone knocked on the door, and over 20% of Gen Z said the same. Younger generations also reported much higher rates of feeling confused at IRL knocks.
On the plus side, younger generations also feel more excited when people knock on their doors. It's unique and novel, so there's an immediate sense of possibility that's always fun — a bit like getting actual mail in your mailbox that's not a bill or an advertisement.
You can point to the rise of social media and texting, plus the COVID-19 pandemic, as a big reason for a dropoff in in-person interactions. Millennials and Gen-Z are less comfortable with unexpected encounters because they're so much more rare. Our friends and family almost always call or text before they come over, so it makes sense that a random knock might give us a scare.
Officer Arsenault's safety advice is more pertinent than ever as the generations that hate answering the door become apartment-renters and homeowners.
Our anxiety at dealing with annoying solicitors and potential evil-doers is totally justified, but our usual coping method of ignoring isn't a good solution. Screening calls and sitting on texts is all well and good, but when it comes to our homes, we have to proudly announce our presence for our own safety!
