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Family of 4 moves from the US to Spain and mom shares why life there is 80% less stressful

"I went to eat with my baby at a restaurant in Spain and my baby started screaming..."

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One family says living abroad with young kids has massively reduced their stress.

Most burnt-out parents I know have at least toyed with the idea of moving far, far away. You can only handle so many news stories of school shootings or eroding child labor laws in the US before you seriously start to think about what life could be like elsewhere.

And it's not even necessarily these drastic issues that are so worrying. It's the day to day: the high cost of childcare and living, the extremely fast pace of American life, and being horribly anxious that taking your kids out in public will bother someone's peace and quiet. It's all a lot, and it's taking a serious toll on American parents' mental health.

Marae and Roger Torrelier hit a tipping point when their five-year-old was getting ready to start school in the US. The two had lived in several different states, including far-away Alaska, but they were finally ready to try a different way of life.

The family of four now live in Malaga, Spain with their older child and a baby. Marae has been documenting the journey on social media and how it differs from their experience living in America.

For starters, they say they're way more comfortable being out and about with their kids in public.

"[In the US] we've encountered venues that even refuse children, whereas in Europe and Asia, children are welcomed almost everywhere," mom told Newsweek.

The family has found their new home in Spain to be far more family- and kid-friendly, not just in the design and policies of the cities, but in the way strangers interact and respond to children.

"Playgrounds have cafés so you can have a coffee, a meal or drink while the kids play. People often interact with our kids with kindness, neighbors know them and ask about them."

I remember visiting Italy with my then-4-year-old and being amazed at how relaxed I felt sitting in a piazza having a glass of wine while she wandered and played in the busy square. It's still one of my top overall memories!

In one viral clip on the family's TikTok, Marae admits "I went to eat with my baby at a restaurant in Spain and my baby started screaming..." You know, baby does as babies do. But what the people around her did surprised the mom.

"The chef came out running to see 'the cute baby' and see if he could make her something to eat. Then he started showing her to the rest of the staff."

In the clip, the smiling chef can be seen playing with the baby before passing her off to another staff member, who is overjoyed to hold the little cutie.

@bravefamilytravel

The sweetest people 😭 #spaintravel #travelwithababy

"We’ve been outside of the US for less than a year and my stress levels have decreased by 80%," she writes in another post on Instagram.

In this clip, the family has popped on over to Italy for a visit, and a sweet old Italian man stops while passing by to smile and wave at the baby.

"When my baby cries I’m not afraid a stranger is gonna come and complain she’s being loud. Instead, they approach to see how they can help. When strangers approach I’m not afraid of what they’ll do but rather excited to see the interaction"

"This is the way it should be. We are social beings. This is the village. ... If you’re looking for a taste of what a child and family friendly society looks like, come to Italy."

There are a lot of things that make many other countries around the world, particularly in Europe, extremely appealing for families.

Kind people, and rude people, exist all over the world. Grumpy folks aren't unique to America. But some parts of the world just have better infrastructure for parents with young kids.

Places like Spain or Italy often have a slower way of life, more built-in time off for workers, better maternity and paternity leave, and childcare that is astronomically more affordable.

(In the United States, putting two or even just one child in full-time daycare so both parents can work costs about as much as a mortgage.)

@bravefamilytravel

we’ve been outside of the US for less than 2 months and my stress levels have decreased by 80%

Viewers and commenters love hearing about the family's journey, and have been quick to share their own stories of living and traveling abroad.

"In Singapore, the sweet Asian ladies took my baby out of my hands, a group of older women circled around her, and couldn’t believe she had blonde hair and blue eyes. It was absolutely such a sweet moment, and you could understand there was no threat."

"We hear a baby cry and we 1) Understand babies cry 2) Hope mum / dad isn't too stressed 3) we've all been there and 4) we remember our little ones"

"In italy we say "it takes a town to grow up a child". It's rare to see people not being kind to kids"

"You should visit Japan once. Babies are rare there because of population decline so they get such a celebrity status kinda love that its heart-rending."

@bravefamilytravel

Best decision ever 😂 says baby Atlas 👏

European countries aren't without their own problems. And believe it or not, there are lots of great communities and villages right here at home in America. You just have to put in a little extra effort to seek them out.

You may not feel comfortable letting your toddler loose in a busy city square here in America. But you can definitely cultivate a close group of family friends who live nearby, maybe even in walking distance.

And you can definitely be that person who offers to hold a crying baby or gives a reassuring smile to a tired parent who's worried they're bothering everyone.

You don't have to move halfway across the world to seek out a different way of life, or make a difference in other people's. But... it sure would be nice if America could make it a little easier sometimes.

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19 cats have drowned in Amsterdam's canals in the past 6 months. The city is taking action.

“A simple measure can prevent enormous animal suffering."

Photo credit: Canva

This could help prevent a lot of suffering, cat advocates say.

We all know about Amsterdam's gorgeous canals. They're a staple and a must-see spot, but folks who’ve traveled there, as well as the locals, will tell you that Amsterdam's free-roaming cats are also a major staple of the city—much like in Istanbul, Tokyo, and Rome.

However, unlike these other cities, Amsterdam’s famous canals pose a major threat to its felines.

As Maggie Ruitenberg from the The Dutch Cat Knowledge Centre explained (according to Euronews), cats often fall into the canals when startled. Even though they can swim, their fur gets weighed down by the water quickly, causing them to fatigue. Pair that with the canals’ high walls, and it’s virtually impossible for the poor things to make it out in time. This year alone, 19 cats have drowned because of this.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Luckily, thanks to a Netherlands-based animal welfare organization called the PvdD (aka the Party for the Animals), they have allocated €100,000 towards making wooden staircases along the banks of the canals in locations where cats and other animals might need it most—in areas where drownings have already occurred, followed by other high-risk spots.

This was an idea taken from the neighboring city of Amersfoort, which already has 300 of the staircases installed. Between both cities, there could be over 500 tiny staircases along the canals by the end of the year.

“A ladder can really save their life, as long as there are enough of them,” said Ruitenberg. According to the Independent, Judith Krom of the Party for the Animals also described the action as “a simple measure [that] can prevent enormous animal suffering.”

“The adopted motion demonstrates that as a city, we take responsibility for protecting the lives of animals.”

Truly, the only bad thing about this is, as Vice writer Luis Prada noted, that these staircases are called “Cat Traps,” and not “Cat Walks.”

“I know they mostly speak Dutch, but they speak enough English to have heard of a catwalk before. It was right there,” Prada quipped. Hard to disagree!

Of course, this is not the first time Amsterdam has made an effort to heighten the quality of life for its canal kitties. Take, for instance, the De Poezenboot, a houseboat-turned-floating-cat-sanctuary that’s housed dozens of cats at a time since the mid-'60s. It’s been described online as a “floating paradise where cats lounge by the windows, nap in flower boxes, and enjoy a peaceful life on the canal while awaiting their forever homes.”

Between these, plus cat walking tours, Kattencafes (cat cafes) and bars, as well as the KattenKabinet (Cat Cabinet) cat art museum, it's clear that Amsterdam is a haven for cats and cat lovers alike. If you plan on visiting there in the future, keep an eye out for those staircases, or any of these other amazing cat-centric fixtures.

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Retired teachers in their 30s live on cruise ships full-time for a little over $10K a year

“It sounds mad, but the numbers made sense."

via Matthew Barra/Pexels

A cruise ship could be your home for a way lower price than you'd expect.

You know that feeling toward the end of a great vacation when you stop and think: I wish I could stay here forever. It might be an all-inclusive resort, a secluded beach, or a fun-filled cruise on the high seas that you just don't want to leave. Of course, for most people, it's a fantasy. You can't just quit your job and live a permanent vacation. But what if you could?

Giving it all up and retiring to live on a cruise ship at 32 seems like a lifestyle choice only available to the ultra-wealthy. However, two financially savvy retired school teachers from Tennessee have managed to do just that, spending under $10,000 for the first eight months at sea.

Monica Brzoska, 32, and Jorrell Conley, 36, met in 2015 while teaching in Memphis, Tennessee. The following year, they booked a week-long cruise to Mexico, Belize, and Grand Cayman. After that, they were hooked on cruising together.

Eight years later, in March 2023, they booked a week-long Caribbean cruise and had the time of their lives. When it was over, instead of returning home to Memphis, they had a wild idea: Why not continue to book consecutive cruises? So, they did just that.

Monica was inspired to start living the life she always wanted after her father fell ill and her mother told her: "Don't wait for retirement. Follow your dreams."

The couple crunched the numbers and found that if they chose the cheapest cabins and used the deals and promotions they’d received from Carnival Cruises, they could book the first 8 months for just under $10,000.

That's not per month. That's the total, coming out to around $1250 per month. Not a bad deal whatsoever. Plus, the more cruises they book, the more perks and deals they get.

“It sounds mad, but the numbers made sense. Accommodation, food and entertainment would be included – we’d only need spending money,” Brzoska told The Sun. “And because we’d been on so many Carnival cruises, we’d earned access to some amazing offers.”

Hopping from ship to ship isn’t difficult for the couple because many disembark from the same ports. But they sometimes have to fly when they can’t walk to the next ocean liner.

The couple then quit their jobs, sold their possessions, and started a new life on the high seas. They rent out their 3-bedroom home in Memphis to maintain steady cash flow. The average 3-bedroom home in the area rents somewhere between $1200 to $1900 a month.

Over the first year of their new life, the couple completed 36 consecutive cruises.

They have already visited countless destinations across the globe, but they can’t choose a favorite. "For a cultural experience, we loved Japan," Brzoska told a Carnival Cruise director on Instagram. The couple also loved Greece for its “history” and Iceland because it was the "closest to being on Mars."

More recently, they've spent time in Amsterdam, the UK, Germany, Belgium, and more. What an amazing adventure.

One of the most incredible benefits of loving on a cruise ship is that so many things are taken care of for you. The couple never has to cook any meals, do any laundry, or drive. Every night, there is something to do, whether it’s checking out a comedy show or enjoying drinks and dancing in the nightclub. Plus, there are always new friends to meet on board with every new cruise.

Plus, on cruises, just about all the costs are covered, so you rarely have to open your wallet. It’s a stress-free, all-inclusive lifestyle. Brzoska says that when you remove the everyday stresses from life, it’s great for your marriage. “Without the daily stresses of life, we rarely argued, but always told each other if we needed space or more time together,” she said.

Brzoska and Conley were one of the first high-profile couples to get attention, followers, and media coverage for the permanent cruising lifestyle, but they're definitely not the only ones. It's an especially popular choice for retired adults and seniors, who find it cheaper and way more fun than living in a retirement community or nursing home. It's also a great choice for people who can work remotely and flexibly, or who own their own digital-nomad-friendly businesses.

The couple also makes sure to have one date night a week, during which they dress up and have a nice meal together.

As of this writing, the couple has been cruising full-time for over two years, or 916 days to be exact. They've been on 106 cruises and visited over 45 countries together. Absolutely unreal.

Most people may be unable to give it all up and live their lives hopping from ocean liner to ocean liner. But there’s a great lesson in the story of Brzoska and Conley: You never know how much time you have left, so don’t wait for retirement to live the life of your dreams.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.


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American living abroad has perfect response to a woman claiming Europe 'is not First World'

Why are we judging other countries based on American luxuries?

via Canva/Photos

A woman in front of the Roman Coliseum.

A woman’s hot take on why some places in Europe should not be considered First World has received some pretty harsh clapback from an American living abroad. The American thinks her opinion is short-sighted and that she’s guilty of viewing other countries through a very American lens.

It all began when a TikToker named @BulletProofBaily, a personal safety expert, posted a “hot take” on why, even though she loves Italy, “a lot of countries that are considered first world in Europe, especially Western Europe, should not be considered First-World countries.” She adds that when she recently visited the Italian countryside, it was hard to find “luxury” conveniences such as bathtubs, air conditioning, or dishwashers.

What is a First-World country?

It’s worth noting that the term "First World" is an older characterization that described geopolitical alignment during the Cold War, and the modern characterizations include "Developed" (or high-income countries), "Developing" (middle-to-low income countries), and "Least Developed" countries that have the lowest level of socioeconomic development. Historically, Italy and America have both been seen as First World and Developed nations.

Baily’s video caught the attention of @WhereInTheWorldisNina, a TikToker who uses her platform to teach Americans how to live and work abroad.

@whereintheworldisnina

No country is perfect and each one has its strengths and flaws. But having some simple “American luxuries” is not what defines a “first world country” aka developed country (the more appropriate term). Stitch with @Bailey #usa #Europe #livingabroad #eurotrip

“Okay, so First World to you means having AC and a dishwasher, that's a new one. You can buy these things for your house if you'd like. They are available in Italy, just a lot of people maybe don't choose to implement them in their house, she said. “Also, we use stats regarding the quality of life to kind of judge whether or not a place is first world or not, just what appliances and luxuries do you have in your home.”

Does America have healthcare deserts?

Bailey also criticized the Italian countryside for having hospitals that were more than 20 minutes away. Nina responded by noting that the same thing exists in America, where there are medical deserts. A recent report found that 81% of U.S. counties, home to over 120 million Americans, are healthcare deserts that lack the infrastructure and services to ensure timely access to medicine and care.

In another very American-centric criticism, Bailey noted that she wouldn’t be able to drive her massive Ford F-150 truck through the streets of Italy because it would be too big. “What I got into my big American F-150 when we got back from the airport, and I'm like this before wouldn't even fit on the street,” Bailey said in her post. But Nina disagrees with the critique, noting that the streets of Italy were made for humans, not cars. “Imagine wanting a big F-150 gas guzzler over walkable cities, public transportation, being less car dependent,” Nina said.

italy, coliseum, travel, american abroad, first world country, europe The Coliseum in Rome, Italy.via Canva/Photos

Just about everyone in the comments took Nina's side in the debate. "Didn’t she CHOOSE her Airbnb? There are pictures and amenities (luxuries) listed," one commenter asked. "You get two options: a) an undeveloped country without AC and dishwashers, free healthcare, free university and more b) AC AND DISHWASHERS, involuntary target practice at school, huge medical debt, huge student loans," another added.

“Oh, you love a place, but you definitely misunderstand it,” Nina concludes her post. “It checks every box of a highly developed nation, you know, First World life expectancy, health care, infrastructure, education. Calling it not first world because your Airbnb didn't have a bathtub is crazy talk.”

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