Gen Xers and boomers open up about whether life was really safer when they were young

Perception is everything.

Sep 13, 2024

Photo credit: Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash – Were the good old days really that good?

Sometimes we hear wistful tales of a bygone era when life was simpler and people felt safer. Kids could go out and run around the neighborhood. Parents didn’t worry about child trafficking or online sextortion or whether their kids would make it through the school day without being shot.

But was life really safer back then? The elders are often the ones who romanticize the olden days, but according to Gen Xers and boomers who were asked, the good old days may not have been as rosy as those rose-colored glasses make them appear.

Someone asked the AskOldPeople channel on Reddit, “Hey elders! I often talk to my grandmother and she states that the world was better back then — she could send her kids out to play for hours with no worries about them. I’m wondering: was life really safer back then?”

Of course, there are always a few people who reminisce about never locking their doors, but for the most part the answers were surprisingly and consistently “no,” but for many different reasons.

Life before antibiotics and vaccines

Most of these tragic disease stories are from Gen Xers and boomers’ parents and grandparents, but still, we’re only a generation or two removed from communicable illnesses wiping out entire families.

“My grandmother had 7 children on a tuesday in 1936. One of them caught diphtheria. By saturday she had one living child. so…”

“It was typhus for my great grandparents. Lost kids 3 of 5 in one week. In Chicago.”

“There’s a cemetery on my property from the late 1800s, there were 6 kids in the family who all died within a calendar year due to a diphtheria epidemic. Newborn to 17 year old, all gone.”

“This is doubly tragic because diphtheria antitoxin (which protected people who had the disease) was widely available by 1910, and diphtheria vaccine was manufactured by 1930.”

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“My grandmother was born in 1897. Her mother had 8 children but half her siblings died of Whooping Cough.”

“My grandfather was only 1 of 6 that survived. The rest buried out back. Yea, so much better.”

“I went to my local cemetery. There were three children from the same family. All under age five. Time of death was the early 1900’s. We don’t realize how good we have it nowadays.”

“This is why vaccinations are so important. People forget that entire families were wiped out by illness.”

“My dad’s sister got polio and recovered. Then she got it again and died at age 7, right before the vaccine was available. My grandma was never the same after that.”

“That’s why the Salk vaccine was such a huge thing in the 50s.”

Food regulations, too

People like to complain about government regulations, but there’s no question they’ve made a difference in food and packaging safety.

“A similar story in my family: in the late 1920s some cousins of my father bought ice cream from a street vendor. Three of the four of them died of botulism. They tried to sue, but the lawyers for Bad Ice Cream only accused them of bad parenting. They got nothing.”

“I read a book about poverty in New York City in the 1920’s. It mentioned that the city gave away potted meat ( whatever that is) and a lot of children died after eating it. The parents couldn’t sue the city because it was considered a charitable act, the city meant well, and therefore they had immunity from the crime. Can you imagine?”

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Rape and sexual assault happened a lot, people just didn’t report it

Young folks today may not fully appreciate what life was like for the generations before the Me Too Movement. It’s still hard to report and be believed, but it wasn’t that long ago that nobody reported anything and swept it all under the rug.

“Particularly pedophilia. It was not spoken about so people did not know to be careful with their children.”

“They were really good at sweeping it under the carpet.”

“Yep rape, pedophelia, child and spousal abuse all grossly under reported. Even murder was – lynchings weren’t classified as murder and neither were the murders of ‘undesirables’ (eg prostitutes).”

“Unfortunately, most people who hurt children are not the ‘random in the neighborhood.’ It’s a family member or trusted family friend (baseball coach, Boy Scout master, church leaders, etc). People often covered this up for the shame of the family and a misguided idea that it was ‘protecting the victim.’ Children were definitely not better protected from this behavior in the past.”

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“I’m from Boston. A ton of my own elder neighbors and their families were harmed by the priests in our neighborhood. They knew. Plenty of them absolutely knew. Sometimes mom would try to go to a higher up about it on behalf of her kid, and she’d get bullied/manipulated into not saying anything (hanging the threat of going to hell over her), and then they’d just move the priest onto some other church to hurt more kids. Families that were deeply involved in the religion were most susceptible to the hush up tactics.”

“In our town, it was the Boy Scouts (late 60s-early 70s). As my age group grew up, it became known amongst the guys that the Scoutmaster REALLY, REALLY liked boys… It made me feel a lot better about not having joined up.”

“Exactly. My mum was abused by an uncle as a kid. No consequences. We were all heavily abused for years by her second husband. Police wouldn’t even respond. It was well known they had zero interest in “domestics.” It wasn’t safer, it just wasn’t acknowledged.”

More drunk drivers, less safe cars

Just the invention of back-up cameras and airbags alone has changed car accident mortality rates drastically. Car seat safety, seat belts, so many safety features we didn’t have back then. Plus a lot more drunk driving awareness (though cell phone distraction has probably replaced a lot of those deaths).

“Cars were very unsafe back then. I knew one person personally, and several more indirectly that died in car wrecks. That really doesn’t seem to happen so much anymore. No crumple zones, no collapsible steering columns, lots of angular metal hard surfaces, no anti-lock brakes. And, people didn’t use seat belts very much back then.”

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“When I was in high school in the 80s, every yearbook had 2-4 “in memoriam” pages for the kids who died that year. It was car wrecks every year I was there. My own children went to the same high school. Classes of 2016 and 2019. During their 7 years at that school (with almost twice as many students) one child died in a freak accident.”

“Growing up, there were several kids in my rural area who died. Car accident were the biggest killer.”

“The cars we drove or rode in fifty years ago could not be sold as new cars today. Roads are safer. There is less drunk driving.”

“The cars point is a big one and just one example of product safety. Products are a million times safer now than they used to be. And then the medical care if you do get hurt is likewise worlds better.”

Survivor bias is a thing

There’s a reason things have gotten safer besides just increased anxiety due to the internet. We also learned from our mistakes.

“Most of the many (many, many) children for whom being a kid back then was a nightmare of malnutrition, crippling disease, brutality, abuse, torture, and an early grave didn’t get a chance to grow up to be grandmothers complaining about how much better the past was. So you’re only going to get part of the story.”

“It’s called ‘survivor bias.’ You see it in all the boomer posts: ‘We didn’t wear seat belts (or whatever else), and we lived to tell about it!’

But some of their peers DIDN’T live to tell about it. Enough of them were seriously injured or killed that it was worth passing laws about seatbelts and car seats and not riding around in the back of pickups, etc.

Enough of their peers were kidnapped/r*ped/killed, that ‘stranger danger’ became a thing and parents realized that it might not be a great idea to let young children wander unsupervised for 12 hours a day.

In short, all the ‘snowflake’ safety measures we have in place today are thanks to previous generations being idiots and the prime example of what NOT to do.”

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“There’s more than a little survivor bias at play when you hear stuff like ‘we played with lawn darts and we’re fine’ or ‘we didn’t need helmets for our bicycles’ or ‘we didn’t have life-threatening allergies like today.’ Things weren’t safer then but people weren’t as aware of the dangers they were avoiding as we are now.”

It’s all in the perception

The internet may have been a mistake, at least when it comes to the flood of news and information we’re bombarded with that makes it seem like terrible things are happening all around us all the time.

“It was less safe but the PERCEPTION of safety was higher. Just like how now it’s actually incredibly safe but the perception of danger is high.”

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“Statistically, it was less safe. But you only heard about issues in your local area, not the whole country, and news was something that for most only came in the form of the daily newspaper, and the evening news. So the perception was that it was safer.”

“So true. Bad things happened but weren’t blasted around the world in nano-seconds. I don’t think it’s any safer due to kids being micromanaged though. Technology and ‘stranger danger’ awareness have certainly had a positive impact on response times and prevention.”

“Yes, this is the correct answer. I grew up in a very safe small town, where everyone assumed bad things didn’t happen, but the internet age has shown us that not only do bad things happen everywhere, but they always did.”

“We also weren’t warned about things. Not like now. I recall in 1st grade one of my classmate – tallest girl in my class – suddenly didn’t come back to school anymore. Our teacher told us it was because “a bad man did something bad to her so she will not coming back.” And that was it. I never did find out what happened but I got the feeling later on that she was raped. A 6 year old.”

“Exactly. The reason everyone feels less safe today is because of our news. 24 hours/7 days a week of it and good news doesn’t sell. So you don’t get much of that.

Violent crime in the US peaked in 1992. With the exception of some bumps, it’s been going down since.”

“This exactly. Before the internet and cable news you just didn’t hear about things that happened outside of your town or even less so outside of your state. There was no 24 hour news, and therefore no need to constantly feed the outrage/fear machine to generate ad dollars like there is now. There has always been crime and there always will be, but crime was in fact much worse when I was a kid than it is now.”

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In Partnership With Habitat For Humanity →

Homeowners celebrate the completion of their new home in Cambodia's Siem Reap Province alongside Habitat for Humanity volunteers and staff.

Culture, Family

A safe, stable home can change lives for the better. Here’s how Habitat for Humanity wants to make that possible for everyone.

Better health, better jobs, and a brighter future all start with access to a safe, affordable home.

Sarah Watts

3/25/2026
A single door can open up a world of endless possibilities. For homeowners, the front door of their house is a gateway to financial stability, job security, and better health. Yet for many, that door remains closed. Due to the rising costs of housing, 1 in 3 people around the world wake up without the security of safe, affordable housing.

Since 1976, Habitat for Humanity has made it their mission to unlock and open the door to opportunity for families everywhere, and their efforts have paid off in a big way. Through their work over the past 50 years, more than 65 million people have gained access to new or improved housing, and the movement continues to gain momentum. Since 2011 alone, Habitat for Humanity has expanded access to affordable housing by a hundredfold.

A world where everyone has access to a decent home is becoming a reality, but there’s still much to do. As they celebrate 50 years of building, Habitat for Humanity is inviting people of all backgrounds and talents to be part of what comes next through Let’s Open the Door, a global campaign that builds on this momentum and encourages people everywhere to help expand access to safe, affordable housing for those who need it most. Here’s how the foundation to a better world starts with housing, and how everyone can pitch in to make it happen.

Volunteers raise a wall for the framework of a new home during the first day of building at Habitat for Humanity’s 2025 Carter Work Project.

Globally, almost 3 billion people, including 1 in 6 U.S. families, struggle with high costs and other challenges related to housing. A crisis in itself, this also creates larger problems that affect families and communities in unexpected ways. People who lack affordable, stable housing are also more likely to experience financial hardship in other areas of their lives, since a larger share of their income often goes toward rent, utilities, and frequent moves. They are also more likely to experience health problems due to chronic stress or environmental factors, such as mold. Housing insecurity also goes hand-in-hand with unstable employment, since people may need to move further from their jobs or switch jobs altogether to offset the cost of housing.

Affordable homeownership creates a stable foundation for families to thrive, reducing stress and increasing the likelihood for good health and stable employment. Habitat for Humanity builds and repairs homes with individual families, but it also strengthens entire communities as well. The MicroBuild® Initiative, for example, strengthens communities by increasing access to loans for low-income families seeking to build or repair their homes. Habitat ReStore locations provide affordable appliances and building materials to local communities, in addition to creating job and volunteer opportunities that support neighborhood growth.

Marsha and her son pose for a photo while building their future home with Southern Crescent Habitat for Humanity in Georgia.

Everyone can play a part in the fight for housing equity and the pursuit of a better world. Over the past 50 years, Habitat for Humanity has become a leader in global housing thanks to an engaged network of volunteers—but you don’t need to be skilled with a hammer to make a meaningful impact. Building an equitable future means calling on a wide range of people and talents.

Here’s how you can get involved in the global housing movement:
- Speaking up on social media about the growing housing crisis
- Volunteering on a Habitat for Humanity build in your local community
- Travel and build with Habitat in the U.S. or in one of 60+ countries where we work around the globe
- Join the Let’s Open the Door movement and, when you donate, you can create your own personalized door
- Shop or donate at your local Habitat ReStore
Every action, big and small, drives a global movement toward a better future. A safe home unlocks opportunity for families and communities alike, but it’s volunteers and other supporters, working together with a shared vision, who can open the door for everyone.

Visit habitat.org/open-door to learn more and get involved today.
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Photo credit: YouTube/Lost in the Pond – Laurence Brown from Lost in the Pond.

Communication, Skills, Uncategorized

Comedian shares 7 American phrases that completely baffle the British

“If we have them in Britain, what’s so American about this apple pie?”

Tod Perry

4/5/2026

Even though Americans and British people share the same language, there are a lot of figures of speech that don’t make a lot of sense when they go from one side of the pond to the other. The British have some unique turns of phrase that are head-scratching to Americans, such as “Bob’s yer uncle” and “Taking the Mick.”

Laurence Brown, a Brit who moved to the midwestern U.S., documents the differences between U.S. and U.K. culture on the Lost in the Pond YouTube channel. Brown created a fun video in which he explains why some American figures of speech make absolutely no sense to most British people. In the video, he explains how he first encountered each phrase and what they actually mean.

1. “It’s not my first rodeo”

“The thing is, rodeo isn’t really a common competitive sport in the UK. And so, if we are aware of it, we’re only aware of it through American movies and clips on the internet of bat crazy things that Americans do for fun. So while we can probably figure out what it means, we have absolutely no idea what it means.”

2. “As American as apple pie”

“I was baffled by the phrase ‘as American as apple pie,’ because if we have them in Britain, what’s so American about this apple pie? Well, as I’ve pointed out on this channel, nothing. Because apple pie has its origins in England.”

Apple pie. Credit: Canva/Photos

3. “Hit the books”

“Americans like to use the term “hit” metaphorically, hit the gym, hit the books, hit the gas, hit the skids. … But in hindsight, even though I was quite confused by the phrase ‘hit the books’ at first, I sort of prefer it to what we’d say in Britain, which is ‘I’m doing revision.’”

4. “The boonies”

“Anybody who’s followed this channel for a while will know that I’ve lived in Indianapolis and Chicago, the two largest cities in their respective states. But often we find ourselves driving between the two cities, where there is nothing other than farmland. In the early days of living in the US, I remember somebody referring to these parts as ‘the boonies.’ This itself was a confusing phrase at first, because I had never heard this word before.”

The phrase“Boondocks” appears to have entered the American lexicon from Tagalog, one of the languages of the Philippines. In Tagalog, bundok means “mountain.” The U.S. military began using the term and changed it to “Boondocks;” then, shortened to “Boonies” to describe the Vietnamese back country.

A helicopter in Vietnam during the war. Credit: SSG Howard C. Breedlove/Wikimedia Commons

5. The wazoo”

“‘Wazoo’ is an American slang term for the buttocks or anus. I see. So when you’re talking out of the wazoo, you’re literally talking s**t.”

6. “Get behind the eight ball”

“It is a billiards term in the UK. Billiards is not really all that popular, and so the phrase, as far as I’m aware, did not really catch on over there. Well, what does the phrase mean, Laurence? Well, it turns out that it means don’t get yourself into a sticky situation. In other words, don’t be thwarted by it.”

7. “Don’t mess with Texas”

“When I first heard it, I thought it was the state of Texas telling everyone else, ‘If you bring a fight to us, we will absolutely destroy you.’ It’s part of the reason that I haven’t properly visited Texas yet. I think a lot of people find this tagline funny because of that weirdly provocative-sounding threat. Well, British people, and anyone who’s genuinely confused by this phrase, might, depending on your perspective, be thrilled or distraught to discover that the phrase was just part of a successful anti-littering campaign.”

The phrase “Don’t Mess with Texas” comes from a 1985 anti-littering campaign by the Texas Department of Transportation. The first commercial, featuring blues guitarist Stevie Ray Vaughn, was a massive success, and the phrase soon entered the lexicon of Texans and the world beyond.

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Photo credit: Canva – A caveman and cavewoman.

People Skills, Science, Uncategorized

Wild new theory suggests that being funny was the sexiest trait a caveman could have

Linguist explains why “survival of the wittiest” beat out the “fittest.”

Tod Perry

4/4/2026

There’s a great line in Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, where the sultry Jessica Rabbit is asked why she loves her husband, Roger, a manic comedian with a penchant for mischief, who’s half her size. Her answer: “He makes me laugh.”

Although that may seem like an exaggeration, there’s a lot of truth to Jessica’s perspective; heterosexual women consistently rank sense of humor as one of the most attractive traits that a man can have. Heterosexual men also find women with a sense of humor attractive, but to a lesser extent.

A new research paper by Wayne State University linguist Ljiljana Progovac suggests that when it comes to human evolution, the phrase “survival of the fittest” could be replaced by “survival of the wittiest.” Her research shows that in the caveman era, humans shifted from a might-makes-right tribal culture, where physically dominant people had the most opportunities to reproduce, to one where a sense of humor was the sexiest trait you could have.

Why did cavedwellers find a sense of humor sexy?

The big changes came when early humans realized that inter-tribal violence did more harm than good. Therefore, being a physical threat was out of style as it was more advantageous to be “groupish.” Those who could cooperate within their tribe to ensure they could compete with other tribes then started getting all the action.

Cavepeople warming up by a fire. Credit: Canva.

Even though early humans treated those in their tribe with greater civility, within this friendly society, those who were verbally fluent became dominant and more attractive to potential mates.

“From the very first moment that our ancestors started combining two words together, those combinations opened up a new kind of competition. Not physical. Verbal,” the Science Blog writes. “The ability to coin a devastating nickname, to skewer a rival with a phrase, to make the tribe laugh at someone else’s expense; these skills, she argues, were subject to sexual selection just as surely as the peacock’s tail or the bowerbird’s elaborate stick construction.”

It seems that even though language developed over a hundred thousand years ago, things haven’t changed all that much since.

A stand-up comedian. Credit: Canva.

Progovac posits that early humans could insult one another or express their sense of humor by using simple two-word verb-noun compounds such as “killjoy” or “pickpocket.” According to the author, people who knew how to throw around those compounds in clever ways had higher reproductive fitness than those who weren’t as adept. The children born to witty individuals could then go on to create even more complicated grammatical rules to show off their wit. This, in turn, led to the evolution of more complex languages.

Progovac’s paper also notes that, on one hand, being quick-witted is an advantage when it comes to sexual selection, while those who aren’t as funny are less likely to be selected.

Cavemen making fire. Credit: Canva.

“In addition to positive selection due to superior language skills and eloquence, it is also important to acknowledge the role of negative selection with respect to these skills, as even minor language disturbances or ‘disorders’ can have a detrimental effect on selection,” Progovac writes. “Especially damning seem to be insults that directly refer to such skills, such as dim-witted, half-witted, f**kwit, slow, and dull, indicating the value that is still placed on wit and quick-wittedness. This suggests that quick-wittedness plays a role both in positive and negative selection in humans, even today.”

This study is a wonderful example of two inspiring ideas. The first is that even if you aren’t genetically blessed with traditionally great looks, a sense of humor can go a long way towards helping you find a romantic partner. Second, humans evolved an incredible sense of humor because it was better to make fun of each other than to beat them with a club.

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Photo credit: via BeyondFoodMarket (used with permission) – Jose Rojas cooks a great meal for $1.

Life Hacks, Skills, Uncategorized

Resourceful cook shows you how to feed a family of 2 a delicious meal for $1

The key is to weigh your food.

Tod Perry

4/4/2026
In a time when inflation is forcing people to make their dollars go as far as possible, an Instagram video by Jose Rojas shows how a little creativity can help families stretch their food budget a long way. In the video, Rojas nearly does the impossible: he makes a tasty, healthy meal for two for exactly $1.

Rojas is the creator of Beyond Food Market, which teaches people in underserved communities and food deserts how to make affordable, nutritious meals. Roajs was inspired to help his community after he lost 90 pounds and kept it off. “Because food did so much for me. It changed my life. It transformed my life. I’m like, I gotta share this,” Rojas said.

How to feed two people for $1

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A post shared by Beyond Food Market (@beyondfoodmarket)

Rojas makes a really smart move when buying the ingredients for his meal by weighing exactly what he needs, so he doesn’t pay for what he doesn’t need. He purchased a medium russet potato, a small tomato, and a small onion for just $0.65 at the Jimenez Fresh Market on Belmont Ave. in Chicago. He also got a break because the cashier threw in the serrano pepper for free.

Sometimes, making your dollar stretch means going to more than one store (we’ll forget the cost of gas right now). Rojas remembered seeing that pinto beans were just $0.69 a pound at his local Jewel Osco, and he bought half a pound for $0.35, bringing the total cost of his meal to $1.

Rojas’ bill at Jimenez and Jewel Osco. Credit: BeyondFoodMarket (used with permission)

How to cook Rojas’ simple $1 recipe

½ lb pinto beans

1 medium russet potato

1 small tomato

1 small onion

1 serrano pepper

Total cost: $1.00

To cook the meal, Rojas used a pressure cooker, soaking beans in water along with chunks of the potato cut about 1/2” thick. While the beans and potatoes cooked, he made pico de gallo by mixing tomatoes, onions, and serrano pepper. (Is he cheating by including the pepper that he should have paid for? That’s for you to decide.)

The final dish was delicious-looking and could be marketed as a Southwest Burrito Bowl or a Vegan Mexican Bowl if you bought it at a Chipotle-style restaurant. The meal is healthy, too. “The recipe was very simple and inspired by the way many of our families have cooked for generations,” Rojas told Upworthy.

This $1 meal is:
- High protein
- Extremely high in fiber
- Loaded with potassium, iron, and vitamins
- 100% gluten-free & plant-based
- Made from real, whole ingredients
The video has gone viral across multiple platforms, and the response has been overwhelmingly positive. “The best reaction has been people telling me that the video reminded them of how their parents or grandparents used to cook during tough times. Others have said the video gave them hope that they can still cook something warm and nourishing even when money is tight,” Rojas told Upworthy.

Ultimately, Rojas’ desire to help people everywhere change their eating habits is a natural extension of his lived experience. “I learned to be resourceful from my upbringing and life experiences. I grew up in a working-class family, and later in life, I had to completely change the way I ate to improve my health,” he told Upworthy. “I ended up losing 90 pounds by going gluten-free and focusing on simple, whole foods like beans, vegetables, and traditional ingredients. Those experiences taught me that good food doesn’t have to be expensive.”
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Photo credit: Canva, @namingbebe, TikTok – There was a time when every other girl was named Ashley. That time has ended.

Uncategorized

Professional baby namer lists the most popular 80s girls’ names that ‘did not age well’

As we know, baby name trends are constantly changing. One generation’s Barbara is another generation’s Bethany. But it doesn’t make it any less odd when you suddenly realize that your very own name has suddenly made it into the “old and unhip” pile. And for many of us 80s babies…that time is now. In a…

Heather Wake

Upworthy Staff

3/30/2026

As we know, baby name trends are constantly changing. One generation’s Barbara is another generation’s Bethany. But it doesn’t make it any less odd when you suddenly realize that your very own name has suddenly made it into the “old and unhip” pile. And for many of us 80s babies…that time is now.

In a now-viral TikTok post, baby name consultant Colleen Slagen went through the top 100 girl names from 1986 to find which ones “did not age well” and were no longer ranked top 1,000 today. Such a descent from popularity would mark them as what she calls “timestamp names.” Spoiler alert: what might be even more surprising than the names now considered old school are the names that are still going strong.

The fall of the house of ‘Heather’

The first name that Slagen says is “officially out” is Heather. That’s right, not even cult movie fame could help it keep its ranking.

Winona Ryder in Heathers. Photo credit: New World Pictures

Other extinct names include Erica, Courtney, Lindsay, Tara, Crystal, Shannon, Brandy and Dana. Tiffany, Brittany and Casey are also heading very much in that direction.

“My name is Brandy. The Gen Z hostess at Olive Garden told me that she’d never heard my name before and it was so unique,” one viewer wrote.

However, Andrea ranks “surprisingly high,” and Jessica, Ashley and Stephanie have survived…so far.

Gobsmacked, one person asked “How is Stephanie still in there? I don’t think I’ve met a Stephanie younger than myself at 34.”

But the biggest holdout still belongs to Jennifer. “She was a top 100 name all the way up until 2008. Round of applause for Jennifer,” Slagen says in the clip.

@namingbebe
Sorry Lindsay, Heather, and Courtney. #babynames #nametok #nameconsultant #girlnames #80skid #1986 #nametrend
♬ original sound – Colleen

The shift toward unique names

If your name has found its way into relic of a bygone era status, fret not. Slagen, whose name also ranks out of the top 1000, assures it just means “we are creatures of the 80s.” Of course, while we still have baby names that become incredibly common for extended periods of time (looking at you, little Liam and Olivia), the real contemporary trend is going for uniqueness. As an article in The Atlantic notes, for most of American history families tended to name their children after a previous family member, with the goal of blending in, rather than standing out. But now, things have changed.

Recently, Kelley Cole went viral on TikTok for a video in which she shared the names that Gen Z teens think are now officially for “old ladies,” which they read right out of a classroom from 1985. “I was told my name was an old lady’s name by the teenagers on the adolescent unit I was working on,” she begins her video. “I was surprised, so the subject came up of what names are old lady names versus young names.”

@thatgenxnurse
#oldladynames #names #girlnames #babynames #popularnames #trendynames #genx #millennial #genxnames
♬ original sound – thatgenxnurse

Laura Wattenberg, the founder of Namerology, told the outlet that “Parents are thinking about naming kids more like how companies think about naming products, which is a kind of competitive marketplace where you need to be able to get attention to succeed.”

But again, even with a keen eye on individualism, patterns pop up. “The same thing we see in fashion trend cycles, we see in names,” Jessie Paquette, another professional baby namer, told Vox. “We’re seeing Eleanor, Maude, Edith—cool-girl grandma names.”

So who knows…give it time (or maybe just a pop song) and one of these 80s names could make a comeback.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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Photo credit: Canva – France isn't the only country with a saying like "un ange passe."

Culture, Pop Culture, Uncategorized

Bridgerton’s Luke Thompson shared his favorite French phrase. We need something like it in English.

Lots of languages have an equivalent of “un ange passe,” but not English.

Annie Reneau

3/9/2026

Luke Thompson has achieved heartthrob status as Benedict Bridgerton, the free-spirited, second-born son of the noble family featured in the popular Bridgerton television series. The show’s fourth season focuses on Benedict’s Cinderella-esque love story with a servant named Sophie, played by Yerin Ha.

In an interview promoting season four, Thompson and Ha read questions from Bridgerton fans. One person asked Thompson, who grew up in France and speaks fluent French, to share his favorite French phrase.

@etalkctv
We can’t think of a better French teacher! 🇫🇷 Luke Thompson revealed what his favourite French phrase is and taught Yerin the language of love in the process! Watch the FULL video of Yerin Ha and Luke Thompson texting fans at the link in our bio. 🔗 Part 1 of ‘Bridgerton’ season 4 is streaming NOW on @Netflix. #LukeThompson #YerinHa #Bridgerton #French #BenedictBridgerton @Yerin Ha
♬ original sound – etalk

“My favorite French phrase is probably…Oh! ‘Un ange passe,’” he said.

Ha asked what it meant, and Thompson helped her decipher it. Un = a/an. Ange = angel. Passe = pass(es). In English, “Un ange passe” means “An angel passes.”

“What it means is, when you’re having a conversation, or like just in a group, it’s a nice way of expressing awkward silence,” Thompson explained. “But it’s just those moments where like, just, there’s a bit of a lull and no one says anything. And you say, ‘Un ange passe.’”

“You say, ‘An angel passes,’” Ha said. “That’s really nice.”

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It is nice. And it appears to be a glaring omission from the English language, since people in the comments shared that they have similar phrases for awkward silences in their cultures:

“OMG we say the same thing in Arabic!”

“We say the same in Portuguese… ‘passou um anjo’ ☺️”

“In Spanish we say that, at least in Chile ‘pasó un angel or ‘un angel pasó.’”

“In Spanish we say the same thing!! México 🇲🇽”

“In Philippines we have this too! Haha may dumaang anghel 😂”

“In Malay we said: malaikat lalu.”

“We have that phrase in Danish too. But it’s more an angel went through the room.”

“The Dutch also have this, but a reverend walks by instead of the angel 🙈 Angel is much nicer.”

“We say that too in Nigeria. ‘Ndị muozi na agafe.’”

this is so interesting to know because we say the same thing in malay when there’s sudden silence, “malaikat lalu”, which also means “an angel passes” https://t.co/hYa6pcfoRz
— 𝖓𝖆𝖉𝖊𝖊𝖗𝖆 (@nadeerayasmin) February 13, 2026

It seems that many cultures have handy phrases like this to make a conversational lull feel mystical or magical instead of uncomfortable and awkward. The wording may differ from place to place—apparently, in Russia and Kazakhstan they say, “A cop was born”—but why don’t we have anything even close to it in English?

When silence falls over a group of English speakers, we just stand there and shift our gaze, feeling the heavy seconds tick by. Occasionally, someone might acknowledge the silence by saying, “Well, this is awkward…” but that only emphasizes the awkwardness.

The irony here is that English speakers tend to be particularly uncomfortable with silence, at least compared to cultures in which silence is viewed more positively.

In his research, linguist Haru Yamada found that Americans consider the length of silence in Japanese speakers’ conversations to be “unbearably long.” Unlike many other cultures, we have no sweet, playful saying to slice through the pregnant pause.

Researchers from Holland determined that it takes about 4 seconds for a silence to become awkward.
— UberFacts (@UberFacts) December 4, 2018

Not all silence is uncomfortable, of course. It becomes awkward when we expect others to speak—or when we are expected to speak—and no one does.

According to Rebecca Roache, associate professor of philosophy at the University of London, the awkward feeling of silence comes from fear of how it might be interpreted: “Specifically, we worry about one or both of two things: having others misinterpret our silence, and having others correctly interpret our silence.”

In other words, we might worry that people think we’re boring if we don’t have something to say, which would be a misinterpretation of our silence. Then again, we might worry that people will think we’re nervous, which may be a totally correct interpretation of our silence—but just not the impression we want to give others.

everyone on Zoom during that awkward pause between the small talk and the work talk pic.twitter.com/HLUXGkRi69
— The Hustle (@TheHustle) June 13, 2023

The beauty of having a standard phrase like “un ange passe” is that it allows everyone to acknowledge that lulls in conversation are a normal, universal phenomenon. It says, “This is so common, we even have a saying for it.” That alone helps lessen the awkwardness. The English language’s lack of such a phrase now feels like a big, gaping hole in our social lives.

Where did the idea of saying “un ange passe” come from in the first place? According to the Lawless French website:

“No one seems to know the origin of the expression, whether the angel’s passing is what causes the silence or if she is attracted by the tranquility, but either way, un ange passe is a nice way to break the tension and continue chatting.”

Can we just start saying “an angel passes” now? Do we need to ask anyone’s permission for this? It appears to be pretty universal, so maybe we English speakers just missed the boat somewhere along the centuries. It feels well past time to remedy that.

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Youth-led party for community engagement, MEDEA, Tanzania Captured by James Roh for Pura

Uncategorized

The next generation of female leaders has arrived. Here’s how they’re making sure they (and every girl) get a chance to learn.

Malala Fund and their local partners, with support from Pura, help girls find their voice. The result: greater access to education and a better world.

Sarah Watts

3/8/2026

Music, community and joy drive real change

In a small village in Pwani, a district on Tanzania’s coast, a massive dance party is coming to a close. For the past two hours, locals have paraded through the village streets, singing and beating ngombe drums; now, in a large clearing, a woman named Sheilla motions for everyone to sit facing a large projector screen. A film premiere is about to begin.

It’s an unusual way to kick off a film about gender bias, inequality, early marriage, and other barriers that prevent girls from accessing education in Tanzania. But in Pwani and beyond, local organizations supported by Malala Fund and funded by Pura are finding creative, culturally relevant ways like this one to capture people’s interest.

The film ends and Sheilla, the Communications and Partnership Lead for Media for Development and Advocacy (MEDEA), stands in front of the crowd once again, asking the audience to reflect: What did you think about the film? How did it relate to your own experience? What can we learn?

Sheilla explains that, once the community sees the film, “It brings out conversations within themselves, reflective conversations.” The resonance and immediate action create a ripple effect of change.

MEDEA Screening Audience in Tanzania. Captured by James Roh for Pura

Across Tanzania, gender-based violence often forces adolescent girls out of the classroom. This and other barriers — including child marriage, poverty, conflict, and discrimination — prevent girls from completing their education around the world.

Sheilla and her team are using film and radio programs to address the challenges girls face in their communities. MEDEA’s ultimate goal is to affirm education as a fundamental right for everyone, and to ensure that every member of a community understands how girls’ education contributes to a stronger whole and how to be an ally for their sisters, daughters, granddaughters, friends, nieces, and girlfriends.

Sheilla’s story is one of many that inspired Heart on Fire, a new fragrance from the Pura x Malala Fund Collection that blends the warm, earthy spices of Tanzania with a playful, joyful twist. Here’s how Pura is using scent as a tool to connect the world and inspire action.

A partnership focused on local impact, on a global mission

Pura, a fragrance company that recognizes education as both freedom and a human right, has partnered with Malala Fund since 2022. In order to defend every girl’s right to access and complete 12 years of education, Malala Fund partners with local organizations in countries where the educational barriers are the greatest. They invest in locally-led solutions because they know that those who are closest to the problems are best equipped to solve and build durable solutions, like MEDEA, which works with communities to challenge discrimination against girls and change beliefs about their education.

But local initiatives can thrive and scale more powerfully with global support, which is why Pura is using their own superpower, the power of scent, to connect people around the world with the women and girls in these local communities.

The Pura x Malala Fund Collection incorporates ingredients naturally found in Tanzania, Nigeria, Pakistan, and Brazil: countries where Malala Fund operates to address systemic education barriers. Eight percent of net revenue from the Pura x Malala Fund Collection will be donated to Malala Fund directly, but beyond financial support, the Collection is also a love letter to each unique community, blending notes like lemon, jasmine, cedarwood, and clove to transport people, ignite their senses, and help them draw inspiration and hope from the global movement for girls’ education. Through scent, people can connect to the courage, joy, and tenacity of girls and local leaders, all while uniting in a shared commitment to education: the belief that supporting girls’ rights in one community benefits all of us, everywhere.

You’ve already met Sheilla. Now see how Naiara and Mama Habiba are building unique solutions to ensure every girl can learn freely and dare to dream.

Naiara Leite is reimagining what’s possible in Brazil

Julia with Odara in Brazil. Captured by Luisa Dorr for Pura

In Brazil, where pear trees and coconut plantations cover the Northeastern Coast, girls like ten-year-old Julia experience a different kind of educational barrier than girls in Tanzania. Too often, racial discrimination contributes to high dropout rates among Black, quilombola and Indigenous girls in the country.

“In the logic of Brazilian society, Black people don’t need to study,” says Naiara Leite, Executive Coordinator of Odara, a women-led organization and Malala Fund partner. Bahia, the state where Odara is based, was once one of the largest slave-receiving territories in the Americas, and because of that history, deeply-ingrained, anti-Black prejudice is still widespread. “Our role and the image constructed around us is one of manual labor,” Naiara says.

But education can change that. In 2020, with assistance from a Malala Fund grant, Odara launched its first initiative for improving school completion rates among Black, quilombola, and Indigenous girls: “Ayomidê Odara”. The young girls mentored under the program, including Julia, are known as the Ayomidês. And like the Pura x Malala Fund Collection’s Brazil: Breath of Courage scent, the Ayomidês are fierce, determined, and bursting with energy.

Ayomidês with Odara in Brazil. Captured by Luisa Dorr for Pura

Ayomidês take part in weekly educational sessions where they explore subjects like education and ethnic-racial relations. The girls are encouraged to find their own voices by producing Instagram lives, social media videos, and by participating in public panels. Already, the Ayomidês are rewriting the narrative on what’s possible for Afro-Brazilian girls to achieve. One of the earliest Ayomidês, a young woman named Debora, is now a communications intern. Another former Ayomidê, Francine, works at UNICEF, helping train the next generation of adolescent leaders. And Julia has already set her sights on becoming a math teacher or a model.

“These are generations of Black women who did not have access to a school,” Naiara says. “These are generations of Black women robbed daily of their dreams. And we’re telling them that they could be the generation in their family to write a new story.”

Mama Habiba is reframing the conversation in Nigeria

Centre for Girls' Education, Nigeria. Captured by James Roh for Pura

In Mama Habiba’s home country of Nigeria, the scents of starfruit, ylang ylang and pineapple, all incorporated into the Pura x Malala Collection’s “Nigeria: Hope for Tomorrow,” can be found throughout the vibrant markets. Like these native scents, Mama Habiba says that the Nigerian girls are also bright and passionate, but too often they are forced to leave school long before their potential fully blooms.

“Some of these schools are very far, and there is an issue of quality, too,” Mama Habiba says. “Most parents find out when their children are in school, the girls are not learning. So why allow them to continue?”

When girls drop out of secondary school, marriage is often the alternative. In Nigeria, one in three girls is married before the age of 18. When this happens, girls are unable to fulfill their potential, and their families and communities lose out on the social, health and economic benefits.

Completing secondary school delays marriage, and according to UNESCO, educated girls become women who raise healthier children, lift their families out of poverty and contribute to more peaceful, resilient communities.

Centre for Girls’ Education, Nigeria. Captured by James Roh for Pura

To encourage young girls to stay in school, the Centre for Girls’ Education, a nonprofit in Nigeria founded by Mama Habiba and supported by Malala Fund and Pura, has pioneered an initiative that’s similar to the Ayomidê workshops in Brazil: safe spaces. Here, girls meet regularly to learn literacy, numeracy, and other issues like reproductive health. These safe spaces also provide an opportunity for the girls to role-play and learn to advocate for themselves, develop their self-image, and practice conversations with others about their values, education being one of them. In safe spaces, Mama Habiba says, girls start to understand “who she is, and that she is a girl who has value. She has the right to negotiate with her parents on what she really feels or wants.”

“When girls are educated, they can unlock so many opportunities,” Mama Habiba says. “It will help the economy of the country. It will boost so many opportunities for the country. If they are given the opportunity, I think the sky is not the limit. It is the starting point for every girl.”

From parades, film screenings to safe spaces and educational programs, girls and local leaders are working hard to strengthen the quality, safety and accessibility of education and overcome systemic challenges. They are encouraging courageous behavior and reminding us all that education is freedom.

Experience the Pura x Malala Fund Collection here, and connect with the stories of real girls leading change across the globe.

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Photo credit: Canva – A caregiver in medical scrubs helps an older man with a walker.

Culture, Generations, Uncategorized

Caregivers at senior living home share the 3 hard truths they wish everyone knew

“Sometimes people forget how much we love the elderly we work with.”

Cecily Knobler

3/2/2026

While caring for the elderly can be extremely rewarding, it comes with a specific set of challenges that aren’t often discussed. Delivering high-quality care is vital for anyone in this position, but this must come with a level of patience many of us might take for granted.

While visiting my own mother in the senior living home where she resides, I was able to sit down for heart-to-hearts with a few of the caregivers who work for various residents. They opened up in a way I found beautifully vulnerable and surprising. Here are their stories. (At their request, I have changed their names.)

Setting boundaries with families

Caregiver discusses a patient with another family member. / Image via Canva

A woman named Veronica shared that she often feels stuck in the middle of family disputes. “I don’t like it when I’m just trying to do my job and take care of clients and I’ve got 20 people calling me. Sisters, wives, brothers, daughters, sons, and even best friends. Everyone has an opinion. I wish they’d have family meetings and decide what to do without sticking me in the middle.”

Another woman, Anne, added her two cents, saying, “Family dynamics are tricky. I want to respect how hard it is to age on everyone in the family, without feeling like I’m inserting myself in the drama.”

They want to be asked about their day

A caregiver takes a break. / Image via Canva

Anne shares that she sometimes feels invisible. “Sometimes I wish they would ask how things are in my life. What my hopes and wishes are. I would like it if they understood that sometimes I need a day off, or that my body hurts sometimes.”

On a resource site for caregivers, one of the helpful tips is finding the balance between helping others and self-care. This means paying attention to their own mental and physical health needs. “Maintaining your health is crucial for being able to care effectively for your loved one. Take care of your own health by focusing on nutrition, exercise, and sufficient rest. Regular self-care routines can help you stay strong and resilient in the face of caregiving demands.”

Mental Health America also has a few articles dedicated to self-care as a caregiver. “If you cannot remember the last time you slept properly, ate adequately, exercised weekly, or did not feel guilty about taking a sick day, then you’re probably feeling the impacts of caregiving on your mental and physical health. Ask yourself: ‘What could I do to replenish myself?’”

They go on to give tips: “Is there any small action that could improve my life or make me feel more content with my present state? If you’re treating yourself fairly, the answer should be yes. Everyone always has some need that could be better fulfilled—caregivers are no exception.”

Hard to say goodbye

Elderly people holding hands. / Photo by Dulcey Lima on Unsplash

Sometimes, especially after a caregiver has worked with a person for more than a month or two, they develop a true bond. While the connection is genuinely satisfying, it can make the loss of that patient even harder.

Mark, who has been working with senior citizens for two decades, explains how devastating the losses can feel. “I worked with a woman named Evelyn for seven years. She passed away at the age of 94. It’s especially hard because when you’re in this business, you might have three clients pass in the span of a few weeks.”

Veronica added, “Sometimes people forget how much we love the elderly we work with.”

These sentiments come back to decompression. Processing just one loss can be difficult. Having to do so for multiple people in a short amount of time takes extra healing time for everyone.

The resource site also notes how important it is to take breaks when needed. “Caregiving can be overwhelming, so taking respite breaks regularly is important. These breaks can help prevent burnout and give you time to recharge. Schedule time for yourself to engage in activities that you enjoy and that help you relax.”

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Photo credit: Canva – A person planning with a calendar (left) and a person running late (right).

Culture, Identity, Uncategorized

How to live more productively by understanding your distinct ‘time personality’

Are you time anxious? Or time blind?

Heather Wake

2/26/2026
It’s true that we all have the same 24 hours in a day. But it’s our own personal relationship to those 24 hours that greatly determines what that day looks like.

Time is one of those things that is both a constant in our collective reality, and yet highly subjective to the individual. It’s why one person hears “We need to be there 6:30” and translates that to “We need to be out the door in fifteen minutes,” and another person translates it as “Oh, I have plenty of time to change my clothes, walk the dogs, listen to a podcast, and clean out that junk drawer!” And of course, these two individuals will be spouses. It is universal law.

It would seem that—much like how knowing whether you’re an introvert, extrovert, or somewhere in between can help you navigate social settings—knowing your MO when it comes to time management can really help make your day flow a lot smoother.

That’s where the four “time personalities” come in.

In an article for Verywell Mind, experts Kristin Anderson, LCSW, and Dr. Ryan Sultan, explained that most of us fall somewhere on a spectrum between “very rigid” and “very flexible.” There are, of course, various factors that dictate why we might fall into a certain spot—including neurodiversity, age, and other aspects of our overall personality. But regardless, knowing the gifts and challenges of our go-to time management settings can greatly affect how we “function.”

See which one below seems to resonate the most.

The 4 Time Personalities

1. The Time Optimist
The never-ending mantra, or perhaps the “famous last words,” of this personality is “I’ve got plenty of time!” regardless of what the clock says.

Because of this, Sultan says time optimists “don’t really feel pressure under a time crunch.” They truly believe they can fit multiple tasks into a short amount of time and don’t easily account for potential delays, which leads to chronic tardiness.

“They’re ones who leave for a dinner reservation with just enough time to get there, as long as there’s no traffic and they hit every green light,” said Sultan.

Folks who consider themselves time optimists might benefit from exploring the “double it rule,” which has you automatically double the amount of time you think it’ll take to get somewhere or complete a task.

2. Time Anxious

Unlike time optimists, “time anxious” personalities feel an enormous amount of pressure, assuming “everything that can go wrong, will go wrong (e.g., traffic, delays, getting lost on the way).” Therefore, they attempt to ease this tension by showing up to things incredibly early.

Dealing with time anxiety involves many of the same tools to handle everyday anxiety, such as grounding techniques (5-4-3-2-1 technique, deep breathing), cognitive restructuring (challenging perfectionism, setting realistic goals), and structured planning (using calendars/apps, setting “worry time”). These strategies help shift focus from the future to the present, reducing the fear of wasted time. And maybe, just maybe, the time anxious can experiment with being fashionably late to low-pressure situations.

3. Time Bender

For time benders, the whole concept of time is merely subjective. Where time optimists overestimate what they can accomplish within a certain amount of time, time benders create entirely different time rules for themselves. “Being 10 minutes late basically counts as on time,” Anderson uses as an example.

These are the curious, creative souls who thrive under pressure and easily lose track of time when they reach a flow state, or bounce from inspiring task to inspiring task.

To help curb time-bending tendencies, a good option could be the “Pomodoro Technique,” which has you working in focused, 25-minute bursts followed by short breaks to maintain high energy and concentration.

“Time blindness” might sound very close to “time optimism” and “time bending,” but the former is associated with an actual inability to perceive the passage of time. That’s why Anderson and Sultan explained that this category is frequently found in those with ADHD or executive function issues.

4. Time Blind

“It’s not that these folks don’t care about being late or making other people wait,” said Anderson. “Without external reminders or cues, it’s easy for them to lose track of how long things take, which makes sticking to a schedule more challenging.”

Sultan added, “Their brains actually have a difficult time registering and processing temporal information, causing impairments in working memory, executive functioning, and temporal discounting.”

Though time blindness might be more deeply ingrained than the other three personalities, there are several proven tools that can help—from simple, tried-and-true methods like visual/audio timers (think hourglasses and analog clocks) to apps designed to help strengthen time estimation. And of course, these tools aren’t exclusively beneficial to those with bona fide time blindness. Optimists and benders can try them out as well.

Once you better understand how you uniquely navigate time, you’re better able to (a) incorporate strategies that help you work within your limitations and (b) give yourself a little grace. Perhaps that last part is most important.
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