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Harvard happiness researcher explains why being bored is 'essential' for our mental health

We have a powerful neurological network that's only triggered by boredom.

Harvard Business Review/YouTube

Boredom is good for us, but smartphones make it too easy to avoid it.

It's no secret that spending too much time on our screens isn't good, but most of us have a hard time not overusing them anyway. Our lives have become so intertwined with technology that we use our phones for everything—communication with friends and family, paying bills, following the news, finding recipes, tracking habits, entertainment, and more. Excessive phone use is associated with all kinds of mental and emotional health problems in youth and young adults, and we're seeing more and more older adults impacted by phone addiction as well.

But hey, at least we're never bored, right? That's true—unfortunately. As Harvard psychologist and happiness researcher Arthur C. Brooks shares, our phones, which keep us from being bored, might actually be the crux of the problem.

"You need to be bored. You will have less meaning and you will be more depressed if you never are bored," Brooks says bluntly. "I mean, it couldn't be clearer."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

"Let me give you the good side of boredom in general," he continues. "Boredom is a tendency for us to not be occupied otherwise cognitively, which switches over our thinking system to use a part of our brain that's called the default mode network. That sounds fancy. It's really not. The default mode network is a bunch of structures in your brain that switch on when you don't have anything else to think about. So you forgot your phone and you're sitting at a light, for example. That's when your default mode network goes on."

The problem is, we don't like it, Brooks says. One of his colleagues at Harvard did an experiment where participants had to sit in an room and do absolutely nothing for 15 minutes. The only thing they could do was push a button that would deliver a painful electric shock to themselves. So the choices were to sit there being bored or shock themselves, and surprisingly, a large majority chose self-inflicted shocks over sitting with their own thoughts for 15 minutes.

"We don't like boredom," says Brooks. "Boredom is terrible."

harvard, psychology, boredom, phone addiction, technology Many people would rather push a button to shock themselves than to be bored for 15 minutes. Photo credit: Canva

But why? What's so bad about letting the mind wander? Brooks says it comes down to having to ponder life's big questions.

"The default mode network makes us think about things that might be kind of uncomfortable," he says. "When you think about nothing, your mind wanders and thinks about, for example, big questions of meaning in your life. What does my life mean? You go to uncomfortable existential questions when you're bored."

"That turns out to be incredibly important, incredibly good," Brooks continues. "One of the reasons we have such an explosion of depression and anxiety in our society today is because people actually don't know the meaning of their lives. Much less so in previous generations. Tons of data show this, and furthermore, we're not even looking."

The reason we're not looking? Because we don't have to. We have a device that keeps us from ever having to be bored, and we reach for it instantly without even consciously thinking about it most of the time.

harvard, psychology, boredom, phone addiction, technology We're so quick to reach for our phones at the slightest hint of boredom.Photo credit: Canva

"You're actually trying to not be bored because the default mode network is mildly uncomfortable, because it sends you to the types of questions that you can't get your mind around, you can't get your arms around," Brooks says. "Well, that's a big problem. That's a doom loop of meaning. If every time you're slightly bored you pull out your phone, it's going to get harder and harder for you to find meaning. And that's the recipe for depression and anxiety and a sense of hollowness, which, by the way, are all through the roof."

So how do we get out of this "doom loop of meaning?" Brooks suggests consciously leaving our phone behind more often and forcing ourselves to "be bored more."

"Tomorrow, when you go to the gym in the morning after you wake up, don't take your phone," he says. "Can you handle it? Not listening to a podcast while you're working out, just being in your head. I promise you, you'll have your most interesting ideas while you're working out without devices. It's probably been a long time since you've done that. Commute with nothing, not even the radio. Can you do that? Start getting better at periods that are 15 minutes and longer of boredom, and watch your life change."

phone addiction, boredom, technology, smartphones, working out Try working out without listening to anything and see where your mind wanders.Photo credit: Canva

Brooks refers to boredom as a skill, and he says the better you get at boredom the less bored you will be with ordinary things—your job, your relationships, and things going on around you.

"But more importantly, you'll start digging into the biggest questions in your life: purpose, meaning, coherence, significance," he says. "And who knows? You might just get happier."

Brooks shares the three protocols he uses to curb phone addiction:

- Don't sleep with your phone. (He has a no device policy after 7 p.m. and doesn't sleep with his phone.)

- No phones during meals. ("We're there for each other," he says. "We're not there for people who aren't there.")

- Regular social media fasts. (He has device and social media cleanses where he avoids them for longer lengths of time.)

Brooks says his brain screams at him at first when he takes breaks, which is the addiction talking. But then it calms down and he ends up feeling a lot better by the end of his break. "These protocols are really, really helpful and I recommend them to anybody and everybody," he says.

Most of us are aware of how addictive our phones can be, but we may struggle to moderate our own usage. Giving ourselves clear boundaries around when, where, and how we use our devices, as well as knowing that the discomfort of boredom is actually good for us, may help us all lead a healthier, more balanced life.

You can find more from Dr. Brooks, including his books and research on happiness, here.

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Former QAnon believer gets real and answers questions about how the cult really works

After one simple Google search, they were out.

Photo by Ehimetalor Akhere Unuabona on Unsplash

QAnon supporters at a rally.

Several years ago, you wouldn't have known what QAnon was unless you spent a lot of time reading through comments on Twitter or frequented internet chat rooms. Now, with prominent Q adherents making headlines for storming the U.S. Capitol and elements of the QAnon worldview spilling into mainstream politics, the conspiracy theory/doomsday cult has become a household topic of conversation.

Many of us have watched helplessly as friends and family members fall down the rabbit hole, spewing strange ideas about Democrats and celebrities being pedophiles who torture children while Donald Trump leads a behind-the-scenes roundup of these evil Deep State actors. Perfectly intelligent people can be susceptible to conspiracy theories, no matter how insane, which makes it all the more frustrating.

A person who was a true believer in QAnon mythology (which you can read more about here) recently participated in an "Ask Me Anything" thread on Reddit, and what they shared about their experiences was eye-opening. The writer's Reddit handle is "diceblue," but for simplicity's sake we'll call them "DB."

qanon, qanon rally, conspiracy theorists, qanon couple, qanon rally, q, A couple at a QAnon rally.via Ken Fager/Flickr

DB explained that they weren't new to conspiracy theories when QAnon came on the scene. "I had been DEEP into conspiracy for about 8 years," they wrote. "Had very recently been down the ufo paranormal rabbit hole so when Q really took off midterm for trump I 'did my research' and fell right into it."

DB says they were a true believer until a couple of years ago, when they had an experience that snapped them out of it:

"It was a couple of posts made by Q on the chans that seemed highly suspicious because of how ignorant they were of technology. Q posts often had weird syntax as a kind of code

    • Kind Of [writing like this] as if there was [a secret] in using brackets To Tell The Truth.

One morning Q claimed to have shut down 7 FBI super computers (named after the seven dwarves no less) via satellite hacking and all the rabid fans ate it up, claiming that their internet was running a little bit faster)

Alarm bells went off in my head because, come on, that's not how any of this works. Using elementary school syntax form To SpeLl a [[Secret Code ]] felt fishy, and claiming your email in rural Montana loaded faster because seven super computers got shut down by remote hacking was a bridge too far for me. I realized that most of the Q believers I had seen were Boomers with no idea how technology works or people my age with no idea how computers operate. That day, I Googled Q Anon Debunked and got out."


If simply Googling "QAnon Debunked" were enough to get QAnoners to deprogram themselves, why don't more of them do it? That's the tricky part. DB explains several elements to Q belief that keeps people in it. A big part of what primed DB to accept conspiracy thinking was a fundamentalist Christian upbringing.

"Theories about evil evolution, science denial and The End of The world rapture return of Christ stuff is all pretty crazy too," wrote DB, who moved to a more progressive version of Christianity after leaving QAnon behind. There's a strong link between the two.

There's also some "perverse comfort "in conspiracy theories like QAnon, DB wrote, "because of the false sense of order and purpose it brings to the world. Either the world is a boardgame chess match between Good and Evil forces working behind the scenes, and you might be a pawn but at least you are on The Right Side or you admit that the world is a mess, nobody is in charge, there is no grand battle of good and evil behind the scenes and your life has less purpose and order than you hoped."

They also said overconfidence and arrogance play a big role in people staying in the QAnon world, as well as the belief that you are the one engaging in critical thinking while everyone else is a mindless sheep.

"At this point, the problem isn't Q, it's gullible people who lack critical thinking skills and gain a massive ego boost in thinking they have a secret that the sheeple don't know," DB wrote.

"Worth noting, conspiracy thinking hooks the brain because it feels like critical thinking. Even though it isn't."

That piece right there really is key.

qanon, qanon rally, trump rally, conspiracy theories, maga, maga qanon, A QAnaon rally.via Geoff Livingston/Flickr

As another user explained, the "do your own research" concept works to reinforce conspiracy theories while making people think they're coming to conclusions on their own, thanks to the way search engines and social media algorithms work:

"The idea behind the 'research' is that you are more likely to believe a source if YOU stumble upon it yourself vs if I tell you -go watch this video. So if I tell you Hillary is a lizard person, watch this video ... It's easy to watch and dismiss me as a crazy that saw a dumb video. BUT ... if I tell you Hillary is a lizard person, but don't take my word for it - google it yourself.... and you come across hundreds of videos and articles about Hillary being a lizard person - that makes it all the more believable. Especially since there's so many articles saying Hillary is NOT a lizard person. If it wasn't true, why would people be making videos and articles 'debunking' it?

And the debunk articles are appearing higher in searches than the articles saying she is. Why is that? Is big tech in on it to ....and you see where this is going.

So their 'research' is just a way of manipulating people."

qanon, qanon rally, trump rally, conspiracy theories, maga, maga qanon, A QAnon supporter.via Marc Nozell/Flickr

DB shared that it was hard to admit that they'd been played by a baseless conspiracy theory. "It's NOT easy realizing you've been conned, been a rube, been taken in," they wrote. "It was massively humbling to realize I'd been a sucker."

However, they are also surprised to see how much "crazier" QAnon has gotten, as when they left a couple of years ago they were "certain it would all be over soon." They weren't a "storm the Capitol" kind of believer, but rather a "snicker quietly to myself in my bedroom because those sheeple don't know the truth" type.

DB explained that they keep themselves away from the edge of the rabbit hole now by embracing doubt and different ideas and have added "some fucking worldview humility" to their life.

"The problem with fundamentalist religions, cults, and conspiracy theories is they all demonize doubt and are all so absolutely certain that they have the total truth of reality figured out. I hold my beliefs much more humbly now, I acknowledge that I could be wrong," they wrote.

"I read more widely and expose myself to the ideas of others, so that I don't end up in an echo chamber."

As for how to help others get out? DB said that arguing with a QAnon adherent, especially online, is a waste of time—and their simple explanation for why makes perfect sense:

"I don't think they can be reasoned out of beliefs they were not reasoned into."

There's no way to rationalize with irrational beliefs, unfortunately. DB suggests if you have loved ones who've fallen down the rabbit hole that you maybe try asking them questions using Street Epistemology techniques (which you can read about here), avoid confronting and trying to reason with them (because it's simply not effective), and continue loving them (while setting boundaries about what you're willing to listen to) so they have a stable place to land if and when they are able to extricate themselves.

You can read the entire Reddit thread of Q and A here.

As frustrating as it is to see people we know fall for kooky conspiracy theories, seeing that it's possible for someone to get out offers a ray of hope that they aren't necessarily gone for good.

Things have changed since this article was originally published in 2021, with some QAnon beliefs evolving as America's political narrative has changed. However, surveys by groups like the Associated Press and the 2024 Public Religion Research Institute have found that 15–20% of Americans believe in some of QAnon’s core claims, including the existence of a secret group of Satan-worshipping elites controlling the United States government.

This article originally appeared four years ago and has been updated.

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Survey of 3,000 couples reveals striking link between wedding costs and 'Happily Ever After'

More proof that money can't buy happiness.

via PixaBay
"I now pronounce you, in debt. You may kiss the bride."

In 1964, Paul McCartney of the Beatles famously sang, “I don’t care too much for money, money can’t buy me love.” While Mr. McCartney’s sentiments were definitely a major foreshadowing of the hippie, free-love movement that was to come in the ‘60s, it appears as though he was also onto a big truth that wouldn’t be proven for another 50 years.

11 years ago, researchers Hugo M. Mialon and Andrew Francis-Tan from Emory University embarked on the first study to determine whether spending a lot on a wedding or engagement ring meant a marriage would succeed or fail.

The pair wanted to see if the wedding industry was being honest when it came to claims that the more money a couple spends, the more likely they are to stay together.

“The wedding industry has consistently sought to link wedding spending with long-lasting marriages. This paper is the first to examine this relationship statistically,” the researchers wrote.

wedding costs, expensive weddings, wedding rings, weddings, marriage, love, family, research, psychology, culture Maybe don't splurge on the big balloon release. Photo by Álvaro CvG on Unsplash

The researchers carried out online surveys with more than 3,000 people who have been married at least once and live in the United States.

After reviewing the answers to the questionnaire the researchers learned that spending big bucks on a wedding and engagement ring made a couple more likely to get divorced.

So much for the idea that "Diamonds are a girl's best friends." Thanks a lot, Marilyn!

The researchers determined that "marriage duration is inversely associated with spending on the engagement ring and wedding ceremony."

For example, couples that spent between $2000-4000 on an engagement ring were about 1.3 times more likely to divorce than couples who spent in the $500-2000 range. For wedding ceremonies, $20,000 was the big cut off — any more than that was correlated with a 1.6 times increase in divorce likelihood. Remember that this study was conducted in 2014. In 2025, the average cost of a wedding is a whopping $31,281. Clearly, an updated survey is needed.

Conversely, the research found that "relatively low spending on the wedding is positively associated with duration among male and female respondents."

Those cheap courthouse weddings that cost almost nothing? Very often, they foreshadow a long-lasting marriage!

The researchers also found that the number of people who attend the wedding matters, too. The questionnaire revealed that “high wedding attendance and having a honeymoon (regardless of how much it cost) are generally positively associated with marriage duration."

The researchers haven’t studied why people who splurge on weddings and rings have a greater chance of having to hire divorce lawyers, but they have a few theories.

wedding costs, expensive weddings, wedding rings, weddings, marriage, love, family, research, psychology, culture A romantic wedding day kiss. Giphy

“It could be that the type of couples who have a … (cheap wedding) are the type that are a perfect match for each other,” Mialon told CNN. “Or it could be that having an inexpensive wedding relieves young couples of financial burdens that may strain their marriage,” he added.

Francis-Tan believes that people who have weddings with a large number of attendees are more successful because they have a lot of support.

“This could be evidence of a community effect, i.e., having more support from friends and family may help the couple to get through the challenges of marriage,” Francis-Tan said. “Or this could be that the type of couples who have a lot of friends and family are also the type that tend not to divorce as much.”

(Interestingly, common sense would indicate that a high guest count naturally drives up the cost of the wedding — so it really comes down to how much you're splurging on food and decor.)

Could it also be that people who put a big emphasis on a flashy wedding and jewelry tend to bit a bit more materialistic? It makes sense that couples that are really into keeping up appearances may not have their priorities straight when it comes to building a loving relationship.

wedding costs, expensive weddings, wedding rings, weddings, marriage, love, family, research, psychology, culture Gwen Stefani throws a bouquet in a music video. Giphy

Of course, there are many, many factors that go into a long, happy, and successful marriage. And don't forget that not all marriages that last are happy. Spending big on a fancy engagement ring or splurging for the chocolate fountain at the wedding don't spell doom for couples that communicate and work on their relationship. Like anything in life, there are no guarantees either way.

To finish things off with another pop music analogy, “If you liked it then you should have put a ring on it,” (just make sure it’s an inexpensive one, in front of a lot of people, in your backyard).

This article originally appeared four years ago. It has been updated.


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Wellness

Millions are obsessed with the science-backed 'Japanese Walking' fitness method

Getting and staying fit doesn't have to be complicated.

Photo credit: Canva

Two women walking through the park.

When did working out become so…complicated? Pricey gym memberships, workout systems that take up precious space in the garage, and don't even get me started on finding the "right" running shoe for your feet (if such a thing even exists).

Yes, there's far too much confusion surrounding walking and running in terms of fitness. But it doesn't have to be this way. Working out using your own two feet does not need to resemble an excellent Avril Lavigne song.

Enter: Japanese Walking.

@coacheugeneteo Walking 10,000 steps... But better 😯 I know I can’t be the only one who looks at my step count at the end of the day and feel like a failure. Some days, I get around 2,000 steps. I still aim for at least 8,000 a day - but sometimes, life just gets in the way. But even if it's only an extra ~3000 steps, this simple 30 minute protocol on my walking pad can make a huge difference.
♬ original sound - Eugene Teo

Also known as Interval Walking Training (IWT), it's a straightforward yet highly effective fitness technique that incorporates interval training methods used by professional athletes. So, it's no surprise that once TikTok caught wind of this simple, low-impact, 30-minute workout (and discovered it works!), Japanese Walking went viral.

Fitness influencers and news outlets alike heralded Japanese Walking as the real deal: a science-backed, lab-tested alternative to high-intensity sweat sessions that also works better than those flashy, fleeting fitness fads, like the (now debunked) 10,000 steps a day challenge or the "12-3-30" treadmill trend.

Ready to find out what all the buzz is about Japanese walking? Let's dive in.

The story behind Japanese Walking

In the early 2000s, a team of researchers at Shinshu University in Nagano, Japan, found themselves grappling with a head-scratching dilemma.

Japan's population is consistently ranked as one of the world's oldest. In 2023, it was reported that nearly a third of Japan's population had already hit 65 years old (an estimated 36.23 million people—approximately the population size of Ghana), with one in every 10 people being 80 years or older.


In the study conducted at Shinshu University Graduate School of Medicine, exercise physiologist Hiroshi Nose and his collaborator Shizue Masuki led a research group on a quest. The goal? To make walking an aging person's new best friend. They wanted to discover a highly effective walking routine for middle-aged and older adults that would help improve their physical and cardiometabolic health.

Early trials in Japan showed promising results. In Nose and Masuki's landmark 2007 study, they observed the physical fitness and blood pressure of 246 participants between the ages of 44 and 78 for five months. The results confirmed their suspicions: that those who followed the IWT program showed greater improvements in strength, endurance, blood pressure, and aerobic capacity, compared to moderate, steady-paced walking or those in the no walking regimen.

via GIPHY

In older adults, these benefits increased even further, with significant increases to thigh muscle strength (up to 17%) and a reduction in systolic blood pressure.

What a perfect ending, right?

If only.

"No one completed the program, and they complained that the program was too boring and too difficult," revealed Shizue Masuki.

Rather than give up when participants found their fitness program boring, Nose and Masuki's research team turned to a popular training method sworn by in the professional sports world: interval training. This type of training is beloved by runners, cyclists, and others who want to increase their speed, agility, endurance, and/or muscle power. It's efficient (you can achieve more results in less time) and prevents boredom.

For example, if you're doing jump squats for a few minutes, then burpees and mountain climbers, or shuttle runs and bicycle crunches, repeatedly, it's pretty challenging to get bored.

What makes Japanese Interval Walking so special?

There's a certain symmetrical beauty to interval walking training.

Rather than maintaining a quick, steady pace, ITW devotees alternate between three-minute bursts of fast, energetic walking and three-minute intervals of slow recovery periods. Alternate between the two speeds for a total of five rounds, or 30 minutes, and that's it! You're done.

outdoors, walking, sports, intervals, fitness Two people walking outside. Photo credit: Canva

For those who want to get technical, during the speedy portion, Nose and Masuki recommend trying to hit 70-85% of your maximum heart rate. Then, during the more relaxed intervals, your heart rate should reduce to 40-50% of your maximum heart rate.

If you're unsure about your heart rate, consider investing in a heart rate monitor. This one doesn't need bells and whistles; make sure that it has a stopwatch and the ability to set a target rate with an alarm.

Why this actually works—while other walking exercise plans fail

Your body craves challenge, but it also needs recovery. Japanese interval walking gives you both. During those high-intensity bursts, you're creating what cardiovascular expert Dr. Mir Ali calls "healthy stress" on your heart and muscles.

"When you increase your intensity of walking or other exercise that raises your heart rate, it's helpful to cardiovascular health and increases aerobic capacity," said Mir Ali, general and bariatric surgeon. "Once you're settled down from that increase, over time, your blood pressure improves."

The benefits don't just stop there. Nose and Masuki's studies also show positive effects on sleep, cognitive function, and depression. Imagine being able to sleep better, think more clearly, and feel happier, all from a simple 30-minute walk. That's the power of Japanese Walking.

- YouTube www.youtube.com


In a world where fitness increasingly feels expensive and complicated, people want something real and accessible. Japanese Walking connects with so many people because it works—it's not a fad or a viral moment. Interval walking training was developed in a lab to scientifically strengthen the bones and bodies of Japan's growing elderly population, and by doing so, offered a rare gift to the rest of the world: a path to fitness that's not just effective, but also efficient, and. most importantly, sustainable.

Oh, and it's accessible! You already possess everything you need to succeed in Walking Interval Training. You, a pair of shoes, and 30 minutes to spare, preferably outdoors.

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