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People are sharing the marriage advice that 'sounded absurd' but is actually really helpful

Here are 19 of the best responses.

marriage advice, marriage tips, divorce
via Pexels

Work at it every single day folks.


The best advice isn’t always obvious, or else we would have thought of it ourselves. It often comes out of left field and can be counterintuitive. When it comes to marriage, the best advice tends to be centered around keeping a focus on the long game.

One of the best pieces of marriage advice I ever received was, “Buy her a bottle of shampoo from time to time without her asking.” Now, that doesn’t mean to get shampoo specifically, but just pick up something here and there to show you care and are thinking about her.



Marriage, if done right, is forever, so that often means taking a loss in the short-term to enjoy the long-term benefits of a happy life with someone. This is great as a concept but in practice can be pretty darn hard, day in and day out.

Hence why about 50% of American marriages end in divorce.

Reddit user thecountnotthesaint put out a call to the AskMen forum for some of the best marriage advice that “sounded absurd” but was actually helpful.

The question was inspired by some advice the Reddit user had received from their father, who claimed that a king-sized bed is the key to a happy marriage. "I'll be damned if that wasn't one of the best decisions we made aside from getting married and having kids," they wrote.

A lot of the advice was about being careful not to escalate small disagreements into larger arguments that could turn personal and ugly. A lot of people think that to have a successful marriage means being able to compromise and to let things go quickly.

Here are some of the best responses to the question, “What random marriage advice sounded absurd but was actually spot on helpful?”

1.

"Dad said 'Be kind even if you’re not feeling it. Maybe especially if you’re not feeling it.'” — semantician

2. 

"At my wedding, my wife's Grandmother offered so funny, weird, solid advice. She said, 'If you get angry with each other, go to bed naked and see if you can resolve it before you go to sleep.' So far, so good. Anniversary on Monday!" — drizzyjdracco

3. 

"The advice I’ve given people is this: if you can go grocery shopping with your person and have the best time ever, you have yourself a keeper. It’s all about making the best of the mundane things, because after years of being together, life becomes predictable. You’ll need to keep the spice going, regardless of what you’re doing. Source: married 15 years." — LemonFizzy0000

4. 

"My grandfather told me 'Never go to bed with dirty dishes in the sink.' What I learned is that he would always help my grandma and that is when they did their most talking." — t480

5. 

"When our kid was about to be born, someone told me to change the first diaper. If you can handle the first one, the others will be easy.' So I did. I didn't know what I was doing, so I asked the nurse at the hospital to teach me, and I changed the first several few diapers while my wife recovered from a difficult labor. The advice was correct, no other diaper was as disgusting as the first one. It got very easy and I never minded doing it, and my wife was really really grateful. And I loved that I could take on some of the parenting chores, since there was so much that she was the only one... equipped to provide." — wordserious

6. 

"Focus on tackling the problem, not each other." — bobbobbobbobbob123

7. 


"Don’t have too high of expectations. My dad told us that, but we found most of our early fights were when one or the other had unspoken expectations of the other or marriage. It is positively life changing to be married, and an amazing experience, but still life goes on."— nopants_ranchdance

8. 

"Marry him for who he is. Not his potential." — There-is-No-beyond

9. 


"My stepmom just passed away, and dad said something that has profoundly changed my attitude: 'The little things that annoyed me are the things I now miss.' So, like, yea for some reason she squeezes a massive glob of toothpaste which mostly falls into the sink basin and she doesn't wash away the toothpaste spit. If/when she's gone, that little constant annoyance that reminds me she's there will be gone too. Don't nag on the little things, rather, embrace them. (still, let her know she has made progress on other things I've pointed out, as I try to adapt to her wishes)." — drewkungfu

10. 

"Say thank you for day to day things, even taking out the trash, sweeping the floor, or folding laundry. Audibly hearing thank you reinforces the feeling of being appreciated." — BVolatte

11. 

"Randomly give your partner a cold beverage on a hot day. It's the little things that show you care." — Purple12Inchruler

12. 


"You don't just marry her, you marry her whole damn family."
— crazypersn

13. 

"One of my colonels told me: 'Just buy two damn pizzas, instead of arguing over the toppings.'"— MgoBlue702

14. 

"Be honest. Don't lie to your partner." — Mikeydeeluxe

15. 

"Don’t marry a woman whose dad calls her 'princess,' because she probably believes it. Much to his regret, my brother ignored this advice from our dad." — Toadie9622

16. 

"My fiance always says that 'just because' flowers are the best kind of flowers." — agaribay1010

17. 

"My Gramps who was married for over 50 yrs said: 'tell her you love her every single day.' Kind of obvious, but I definitely took it to heart." — sorellk

18. 

"Love isn’t about having 'nice feelings for each other.' It’s about acting for the betterment of someone else, even if you don’t feel like it. Emotions will change. Your willingness to treat your spouse a certain way doesn’t have to." — sirplaind

19. 


"Bill Maher said "The three most important words in a relationship aren't 'I love you', they're 'let it go.' Oddly, this has proven to be some of the best relationship advice I've ever heard."
— KrssCom


This article originally appeared on 05.30.22

When 6-year-old Blake Rajahn shows up to his first grade classroom on Monday, he will arrive bearing an uplifting a message for his fellow students.

Blake's mother, Nikki Rajahn, runs a custom personalization business in Fayette County, Georgia, and she asked her son what kind of t-shirt he wanted for his first day of school. He could have chosen anything—his favorite sports star's number, a cool dragon, a witty saying—anything he wanted, she could make.


Blake chose something unexpected—an orange t-shirt with a simple, sweet message for the other kids at his school to see. Five little words that might just mean the world to someone who reads them.

"I will be your friend."

Ouch. My heart.

Rajahn shared the story on her business Facebook page:

"I have to brag on my son. I told him that as a back to school gift, I will make him any shirt he would like. It could have anything—a basketball theme, football, etc. which are all his favorites. He thought a while and said, 'will you please make me a shirt that says "I will be your friend" for all the kids who need a friend to know that I am here for them?' Never underestimate your kid's heart for others! I love my sweet Blake! #stopbullying"







Apparently, such a gesture is typical of Blake. "He has always had a heart for others and is very genuine," his mother told Upworthy. She said she's donating part of the proceeds of her t-shirt sales to the Real Life Center, a non-profit that helps families in need in Tyrone, Georgia, all because of Blake.

"During the summer we had a vacation Bible school that he went to," she said, "and they did a toothbrush and toothpaste drive for the Real Life Center. He came home saying we needed to go to the Dollar Store to get some that night. We told him we would go the next day, but he had to use his money for it. He said that was fine, so we asked how much he would like to spend. He said, 'It's for people who don't have any, right?' We said yes, so he very matter-of-fact said, 'Well all of it!' And he did!"

Rajahn said everyone has been very encouraging and people are starting to order their own version of the t-shirt with "#blakesfriends" added to it.

She also shared Blake's reaction to hearing that his shirt idea was starting to spread on Facebook—and again, it's just the sweetest darn thing.

"Ever since I posted about my son and his shirt, I have sold some and told Blake about it. He said, "Oh good! Now more and more people are going to have more and more friends!" He is just so flattered so many want to be his twin too 😊"

Sometimes all a person needs is one friend so they won't feel alone, and Blake going out of his way to make sure kids feel welcomed by him is an example even adults can learn from. If we all reached out to people who might be shy or who might feel excluded, and let them know in some small way that we are open to being friends, what a better world we could build.

Thank you, Blake, for bringing some much-needed sunshine into our day.


This article originally appeared on 8.2.19

One of the great joys of having a pet is seeing how they develop and learn over their lifetimes.

Sometimes, the things they pick up from us are surprising because they're completely unintentional.

Reddit user TheRoseByAnotherName asked the online forum "What's the best thing you've accidentally trained a pet to do, like a behavior that is specifically from interaction with you and couldn't just be a quirk or learned themselves?" and the answers were surprising and funny.

Here are 13 of the best.


1. Crafty kitten

"When my old cat was a kitten he would get in your face when you were eating and try to steal stuff off your plate/fork/mouth. Squirt bottle came into play and after a few days he realized if he stood by the xbox we would not squirt him and he could plan an attack," dj_narwahl

white and gray cat Photo by Mikhail Vasilyev on Unsplash



2. The bed of solace

"I had three brothers growing up who loved to torment my mainecoon. I made the rule they couldn't touch him on my bed. They would chase him through the house and he would make a huge flying leap onto my bed (1 bedroom for four kids) and then whip around and just glare daggers at them, knowing he was safe. I swear it only took him a week to figure it out!" — [Account deleted]

white and black cat on white textile Photo by Polly Alexandra on Unsplash

3. Pavlovian X-Box

"The noise of the Xbox turning off. When the dog hears that 'boo boo bing' noise he goes fucking apeshit thinking he's getting taken on a walk. To be fair. He usually is," — belsnickel222

4. "Go upstairs!"

"My wife and I lived in a condo and whenever one of us went upstairs we announced it. Like "I'm going upstairs." Then go. So one day my wife is trying to snack on something and our dog was bothering her and she got fed up and scoldingly said 'Go upstairs!' Up the stairs he went! Where he sat and stared at her as if nobody ever feeds him and one little bite would mean the world," —The_Superfist

a dog is sitting on the stairs of a house Photo by Natalie Kinnear on Unsplash

5. Bird blessing

"I had a budgie who was impossible to train, but he chirped twice after anyone in the house sneezed. It was his form of 'Bless You,'" — A_Big_Pizza_Pie

green bird on brown tree branch Photo by Johannes Giez on Unsplash

6. Husky Pants

"A little bit of preface....I hate pants, I'm more of a skirt or dress type of person. My energetic Sheepherder Husky mix knows if I have pants on it means I'm taking her for a hike. Now whenever I'm seen in pants she freaks out, jumping up and down and running to the front door," — HiraeathAtRockBottom

a dog running in the snow Photo by Ivan Rudoy on Unsplash

7. The dog 'n the hat

"My dog is a retriever so she likes to hold things when I get home, not too uncommon. I started giving her my hat and after a while she started jumping up to get it. Now I have to kneel down so she can gently pluck it off my head. Adorable. Unfortunately she loves all hats now. So, this poor kid (2.5-3years old) was at a barbecue at my house and decided she wanted to run around with her baseball cap on. Cue my dog running after her, bowling her over, and stealing her hat to bring to me. I was mortified," — Fishes_Suspicous

dog running on show Photo by Marcus Löfvenberg on Unsplash

8. "What did you do?"

"I used to scold my dogs my saying 'What did you do?' in a stern, disappointed voice. Then we were watching TV, and a male voice said 'What did you do?' and they both just sat there looking like they were in trouble," Uffda01

9. Good boy toots

"My dog farts when he wants attention. Every time he would fart, my gf and I would laugh and tell him he's a good boy. Now he'll come up to me, sit, wag his tail, and let a few toots out. Not sure if it's his short fur or just his anatomy, but they're almost always audible," — BonkeyKongCountry.

black pug in black and white Photo by Priscilla Du Preez 🇨🇦 on Unsplash

10. Bad kitty

"When my childhood cat would bite us or my parents, my mum would put her outside as punishment. When she felt like going outside, she'd come and bite us," — SusieQ134

view of white cat Photo by Chen Yi Wen on Unsplash

11. Medical support dog

"I am chronically ill and have an autoimmune disease that causes my blood pressure to crash while upright and Pass out frequently. Certain exercises are important to stop from passing out frequently so I hike daily with my dog. After passing out a bunch on hikes (and at home), My dog somehow has learned to warn me by standing close to my hand and staring at me on our hikes when my blood pressure is getting low and my heart rate is increasing to tell me to sit/lay down before I pass out. It's become super helpful!" — FrogyFrogFrog123

a black dog wearing a yellow bandana standing in front of an airplane Photo by Jeswin Thomas on Unsplash

12. Blinky bunny

"My rabbit, Poe, will only exit his cage when given the go ahead (a nod), and as soon as he does, he binkies twice then sits in my lap. Every. Single. Time," — TerribleEyeSight

rabbit on polka-dot fabric Photo by Lucy M on Unsplash

13. Spelling pooch

"My old dog (RIP) learnt to spell certain words which we didn't want to say in front of her. She would go mental if we spelt out "W-A-L-K", "L-E-A-D" or "O-U-T". I miss her," — SilentSamamamander


This article originally appeared on 8.16.19

Julian Worsham gets a new cart.

Six-year-old Julian Worsham of Beaverton, Oregon is like a lot of other first-graders: he loves Super Mario and Taekwondo. But he has achondroplasia, the most common form of dwarfism, and goes to a school that wasn't built for kids his height.

"He's born into a world that just, in some ways, is not built for him," Julian's father, Brett, told WHAS11.

His mother did a walk-through before his first day at school to make sure he wouldn't run into any problems because of his height but forgot to check the cafeteria. [We] "noticed that where the food was, was right at his head," Heather told the Beaverton School District. Then, to make things more of a struggle, he had to carry his tray outside to the lunch benches.

The school made him a makeshift cart out of an upside-down milk crate on wheels to help him transport his lunch from the cafeteria to the benches.

"When I saw it I thought, 'Wow,'" said Enedelia Mottram, who's served lunch for the school district for 18 years. "I just wanted to help Julian, because I mean his head barely reaches the lunch line. He can't see anything."


Julian's first cart wasn't cutting the mustard.

via Beaverton School District

That night, she talked to her husband, James, a metalworker, to see if he could come up with something better. He got his team together at Wright Manufacturing in Portland to create a new cart that allowed Julian to transport his lunch tray and see over the counter.

James told the Beaverton School District that he wanted to make something that Julian would be "proud to push around."

James and his team put together a badass cart with adjustable, handlebar grips just like a motorcycle that has a stool inside so he can reach the countertop. It is adorned with flames and a personalized license plate that says, "JULIAN."

Julian's parents were blown away by the care and creativity that was put into creating his cart.

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"They took the time to get those license plates with his name, which is just like, they just really put a lot of heart into it. So when I saw it, the first thing I saw was actually a picture of James and his team who made the cart and I cried. It's just such a sweet thing," Heather said.

Julian loves the license plate and the flames and is now able to grab his lunch and get out to the benches in style.

"He's independent now," said Mottram. "Before, a staff member [would] have to be there to help him," she said.

Heather hopes that the story will inspire others to reach out and help other people in need.

"There's just wonderful people in this world that, you know, they have their eyes open. They're seeing needs that need to be met and they're meeting them. So I hope that other kids can get their needs met through this," she said.


This article originally appeared on 11.3.21

via Celina Romera / Flickr

When you see someone jump out of their car at a red light to talk with another motorist, usually it's bad news. Most of the time, it's the moment when road rage gets personal.

But 26-year-old Celina Romera caught video of probably one of the most adorable red-light interactions between motorists on December 15 in Tampa, Florida.


In the video, an unidentified man pops out of his car at a stoplight with a darling puppy in his hand. In the other car, a big German Shepherd pops his head out and the two dogs exchange kisses.

"I JUST WITNESSED THE PUREST THING EVER," Romera wrote on Facebook.

After the light changes, the man with the puppy gently walks back to the car. In the video Romera can be heard saying, "It's okay, man. Take your time."

One could imagine that the dogs were barking at each other before the video began.Then, the owner of the puppy thought it was okay for the two dogs to meet. The American Kennel Club says that barking between dogs is a pretty crude way to communicate.

However, it is part of a host of messages that dogs send to one another.

The job of a dog's owner is to determine if the dogs are ready to share a sniff or of one is fearful.

"The combination of barking, body language, and approach-avoidance behavior gives away the fearful dog's motivation, even to us relatively uneducated body-language readers," the Club says on its blog.

The original video Romera posted has been shared over 120,000 times.

The heartwarming video is a reminder that nothing can bring two strangers and millions of Facebook viewers together quite like dogs.


This article originally appeared on 12.16.19


via Freddie Mercury / Twitter

Carlos Díaz Ballesta dressed up like Queen front man Freddie Mercury and put on a show for his neighbors from his balcony in Spain. He threw on Mercury's iconic jeans, undershirt, and mustache and lip-synced to Queen's 1984 song, "I Want to Break Free."

In the video, Ballesta dances with a vacuum cleaner, an homage to the song's video. In the "I Want to Break Free" video, members of Queen dressed in drag as characters from the British soap opera "Coronation Street."





Freddie Mercury balcony (auténtico autor del baile)- OFICIAL 🇪🇸 (del auténtico autor del baile)youtu.be


While the video was a hit across the world it was a dud in America where no one knew what the band was lampooning.

"All around the world people laughed and they got the joke and they sort of understood it," Queen guitarist Brian May told NPR Radio. "I remember being on the promo tour in the Midwest of America and peoples' faces turning ashen and they would say, 'No, we can't play this. We can't possibly play this. You know, it looks homosexual'."


- YouTubewww.youtube.com



This article originally appeared on 5.8.20