James Van Der Beek's pregnancy announcement casually helps destigmatize miscarriages

Instagram / James Van Der Beek

About one in five pregnancies end in miscarriage, although it is believed the number might be higher because many miscarriages occur before the woman knows she is pregnant. Miscarriage is actually quite common, yet many people who've had one feel alone, partly because there's still a taboo around talking about it. In order to reduce the stigma surrounding the loss, James Van Der Beek opened up about the struggles him and his wife, Kimberly, experienced.

The Van Der Beeks, who have been married since 2010, have five children and one on the way. In a pre-taped segment on "Dancing with the Stars," Van Der Beek announced that his family will be welcoming a new baby. But the segment gave us a more personal look as Van Der Beek revealed they've experienced three miscarriages as well. "We've had five kids and three miscarriages," Van Der Beek told his dance partner, Emma Slater. "Miscarriage is something that people don't really talk about, and we wanted to recognize that it happens to people. We wanted to destigmatize that as much as we possibly could."


The Van Der Beeks also gave us a look into the ultrasound, revealing many of the anxieties the couple had while waiting to hear their baby's heartbeat for the first time. "Hearing the heartbeat was something we never take for granted," he said in the segment.

RELATED: These moms are flaunting their stunning postpartum bodies on Instagram

Van Der Beek has no regrets about sharing the moment with the world. "It's a part of life," he told People. "It really helps to go through when you have the support of friends and family. People so often go through it in secret. You need to allow yourself space to grieve and go through it. For us, we walked out incredibly happy and excited."

Van Der Beek posted about the moment on Instagram, revealing why he chose to bring cameras in on such a personal moment. "Thrilled beyond belief to announce that another little bundle of joy has picked us to be their family. We chose to have our first ultrasound on camera with our #DWTS crew capturing the result - something I NEVER thought we'd ever do... but @vanderkimberly and I have been through three of those first appointments to discover either no heartbeat, or no baby, and she wanted to share this moment," he wrote.

Van Der Beek also spoke about how miscarriage shouldn't come with a stigma. "Miscarriage (a word that needs a replacement - nobody failed to 'carry', these things sometimes just happen) is something that people rarely talk about, and often go through in secret. But there needs to be zero shame around it, or around giving yourself the time and space to grieve," he continued.

RELATED: We need to fundamentally reexamine how new moms are cared for after childbirth



We celebrate pregnancies and births in a very public fashion, yet many people choose to grieve their miscarriages in private. It might be hard for those who've experienced the loss of a pregnancy to connect with others just because we don't talk about it. By opening up about his struggles and being vulnerable, Van Der Beek helps people who have had similar experiences feel less alone. You're never alone.

popular
via KLM Royal Dutch Airlines

Travelling during the holiday season can be a hectic experience. Airports are busy, people tend to be bogged down by extra extra luggage filled with gifts, and the weather is terrible so flight delays are common.

People can be stuck for hours in a terminal waiting for their flights, many of them alone as they travel to see family or make an end-of-the-year-business trip.

Keep Reading Show less
popular
via TK2LDCNews / Twitter

For the first time since the annual holiday production began in 1954, the lead role of Marie in The New York City Ballet's production of "George Balanchine's The Nutcracker," is a black ballerina.

Eleven-year-old Charlotte Nebres, whose mother's family is from Trinidad and father's is from the Philippines, is a student at the School of American Ballet.

The leading role of the young heroine is known as Marie in the New York City Ballet's production, in others the young girl who dreams The Nutcracker to live is called Clara.

Keep Reading Show less
popular

Despite controversial-but-compelling evidence that homework takes time away from families with little to no appreciable benefit for students, kids continue to slog through hours of school work outside the time they spend in the classroom. And despite evidence that small acts of kindness can infect a community like a positive virus, far too many kids are on either the giving or receiving end of unkind bullying on a regular basis.

Perhaps that's why an elementary school in Ireland has decided to do something radical—ditch all homework for the month of December and assign kids "acts of kindness" instead.

Keep Reading Show less
popular

Brace yourselves, folks, because this is almost too friggin' adorable to handle.

A 911 call can be a scary thing, and an emergency call from a dad having chest pains and trouble breathing is no exception. But thankfully, an exchange between that dad's 5-year-old daughter and 911 dispatcher Jason Bonham turned out to be more humor than horror. If you missed hearing the recording that has repeatedly gone viral since 2010, you have to hear it now. It's perfectly timeless.

Keep Reading Show less
popular