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In men, it’s Parkinson’s. In women, it’s hysteria.

In men, it’s Parkinson’s. In women, it’s hysteria.
via Columbia Social Work / Twitter

This article originally appeared on ProPublica. You can read it here.

Once it was called "hysterical" movement disorder, or simply "hysteria." Later it was labeled "psychogenic." Now it's a "functional disorder."

By any name, it's one of the most puzzling afflictions — and problematic diagnoses — in medicine. It often has the same symptoms, like uncontrollable shaking and difficulty walking, that characterize brain diseases like Parkinson's.

But the condition is caused by stress or trauma and often treated by psychotherapy. And, in a disparity that is drawing increased scrutiny, most of those deemed to suffer from it — as high as 80% in some studies — are women.

Whether someone has Parkinson's or a functional disorder can be difficult to determine. But the two labels result not only in different treatments but in different perceptions of the patient. A diagnosis of Parkinson's is likely to create sympathy, but a functional diagnosis can stigmatize patients and cast doubt on the legitimacy of their illness.


Four in 10 patients do not get better or are actually worse off after receiving such a diagnosis and find themselves in a "therapeutic wasteland," according to a 2017 review of the literature by academic experts.

"This is the crisis," said University of Cincinnati neurologist Alberto Espay, the author of guidelines on diagnosing functional movement disorders. "It shouldn't be stigmatized but it is. No. 1, patients are wondering if it is real. 'Does my doctor think I am crazy?' Secondly, doctors can approach it in a way that implies this is a waste of their time."

A study published last year in a leading neurological journal stoked the growing controversy. Of patients diagnosed with functional symptoms, 68% were women. This finding, the authors wrote, "suggests that female sex may be an independent risk factor for the development" of functional symptoms.

The study prompted a furious letter to the journal's editor from Dr. Laura Boylan, a New York City neurologist. She argued that the study's results might demonstrate instead that symptoms thought to be psychogenic were actually the result of Parkinson's, and that doctors were slow to identify the brain disease in women.

"Disparities in healthcare for women are well established," she wrote, adding, "Women commonly encounter dismissal in the medical context."

For Boylan, the issue was more than a professional debate. It was personal. She had been diagnosed with Parkinson's-like symptoms that her doctors, all top caregivers at some of the world's leading medical institutions, largely believed to be psychogenic or side effects of medication.

via PixaBay

Most of her doctors were men, but two were women. Boylan, herself a brilliant neurologist, disagreed vehemently with them. She attributed her problems to a physiological cause, a tiny cyst in her brain, and grew despondent when other neurologists doubted her theory. She gave up her medical practice, became housebound and contemplated suicide. Even today, her case remains a mystery.

The first sign that something was wrong came in 2008.

At the time, Boylan was busy with a successful career that included work as a teacher, researcher and clinician. She was an assistant professor of neurology at the New York University School of Medicine; the director of the behavioral neurology clinic for the VA in New York City; and an attending physician at a hospital in Pennsylvania.

She was married to another neurologist, Daniel Labovitz, who is a professor at the Albert Einstein College of Medicine and practices at Montefiore Medical Center in the Bronx.

It was while driving at night on a Pennsylvania highway that Boylan experienced a vivid hallucination. She saw a cartoonish chipmunk on the steering wheel, smiling and waving at her. Another time, two blue men with red hats appeared on either side of her. She knew the images were not real, but she couldn't make them go away.

Her doctors at the time blamed the hallucinations on side effects of psychiatric medicine Boylan took for her long-diagnosed bipolar disorder. Her bipolar condition would later add another element of uncertainty to the debate over her Parkinson's-like symptoms.

Studies show that people with preexisting psychiatric disorders are more likely to develop Parkinson's — or have a functional disorder with similar symptoms. Boylan said she sees a psychiatrist for the bipolar disorder, but it's "just not a big deal in my life."

Over time, her health continued to worsen. In early 2011, during a tai chi class, she had difficulty balancing on her right leg. Later, she also noticed muscle twitching in her feet and legs.

Boylan was worried that some of her symptoms mirrored those found in patients with amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, or ALS, a rare and degenerative neurologic disease that affects the ability of muscles to function. ALS, also known as Lou Gehrig's disease, was ruled out by a specialist, but an imaging scan performed as part of that exam revealed a small cyst on the front right side of her brain.

The location and type of cyst are considered rare. At the time, Boylan and the neurologist she consulted didn't believe the cyst was causing her movement problems and chalked it up as an "incidental" finding not to be concerned about.

In the fall of 2013, Boylan experienced a three-day bout of double vision that forced her to miss work. The episode was disturbing because it left her, for the first time, unable to perform her duties as a doctor.

About a week later, she went to see Janet Rucker, then a neuro-ophthalmologist at Mount Sinai Medical Center. Rucker diagnosed convergence insufficiency, a condition in which the eyes are unable to work together to focus on close by objects. Rucker thought it unlikely the brain cyst was causing the vision problem and believed it was more likely related to medication Boylan was taking, according to her notes.

via Bryan Jones

Boylan returned home unconvinced by Rucker's opinion. Her vision improved enough to allow her to research the condition herself. She said she found instances where levodopa, a medication used to treat Parkinson's that she had prescribed many times for her own patients, helped alleviate the vision problem.

She decided to take her treatment into her own hands and took levodopa she prescribed for herself. Boylan knew the decision to test her own theory was a direct challenge to Rucker's competence.

While legal, self-prescribing medication is considered an unsound practice by some in the medical establishment. Physicians who treat themselves risk removing the objectivity usually present in a doctor-patient relationship, which can lead to poor decisions.

Within an hour of taking the levodopa, Boylan's eyes converged and the vision problem cleared. That wasn't all. Involuntary tremors and twitches stopped. She later wrote that she "felt years younger" and "moved much better" immediately after taking the drug.

For Boylan, the experience with levodopa confirmed what she had come to suspect; that the cyst in her brain thought to be harmless was in fact causing her Parkinson's-like symptoms. (In Parkinson's, nerve cells in the brain that help control body movements break down or die.)

If she had a functional disorder, the drug should have no effect. She excitedly dashed off an email to Rucker reporting her success and attached a video showing her eyes working properly.

"That is a pretty impressive effect," Rucker replied. She wrote that she rarely recommended the drug for convergence insufficiency, but given Boylan's improvement, "perhaps I'll recommend it more often."

Rucker, however, didn't appear to think the cyst was responsible for Boylan's double vision, calling it the "least likely" of options, according to her notes of the case. More likely, she wrote, it was related to other medications Boylan was taking.

Boylan didn't learn about the contents of the medical notes from her visit until later. Boylan, who believed her recovery proved that the cyst was the origin of her double vision, was insulted.

"That I solved this problem with levodopa, documented it, and returned to work the next day might be taken as evidence of my skill rather than having a screw loose," she later wrote to Rucker, who declined comment for this story.

Levodopa is a potent drug used to control tremors and stiffness in Parkinson's patients. The development of the drug, and what it revealed about how the brain works, was an important breakthrough that won one of the researchers involved the Nobel Prize in medicine in 2000. But levodopa can also produce side effects that include involuntary movements, from tics to sudden, jerky body motions, different from those that it had alleviated in Boylan.

Boylan decided to continue taking the drug, but wanted another neurologist to help manage her situation. She chose Elan Louis, a neurologist who had been just ahead of her in the Columbia residency program. Boylan told him she was serving as her own neurologist and that her situation was "getting acutely worse."

via pixabay

The two doctors saw each other at the occasional reunion, but they were not close. Boylan largely knew of Louis by reputation. He is considered one of the leading experts on movement disorders and is the editor of Merritt's Textbook of Neurology, a standard clinical guide in the field.

He practiced at Columbia when Boylan first began seeing him in late 2013 but was recruited to Yale University in 2015 to serve as chief of the movement disorders division in the neurology department.

Louis had not treated a specialist in his own field before. The relationship proved challenging. Boylan has a combination of intelligence and passion that attracts devoted friends. Louis described Boylan as "super smart" and someone who was constantly digging into the medical literature to learn as much as she could about her symptoms and the cyst in her brain.

She could also be blunt and confrontational. Boylan was one of several people arrested a decade ago for refusing to leave a U.S. senator's office as part of a sit-in advocating for single-payer health care.

She was also an early proponent of limiting the perks that pharmaceutical companies give doctors to encourage them to prescribe their drugs, a stance that irked some colleagues but also won her admirers. Boylan was not hesitant to challenge her own doctors' assessments, as she had done with Rucker. With a mix of pride and contrition, she describes herself as a difficult patient.

In one email exchange in 2015, Boylan appeared miffed that Louis did not believe that a bout of heart palpitations and dizziness was related to her brain cyst. "I wish you'd responded earlier when you found my questions odd/unreasonable," Boylan chided Louis. "At present I know more about this area than you and yet seem crazier because of it."

At least 10% of the patients who seek help for movement disorders at the Yale clinic are determined to have a psychogenic, or functional condition, Louis said. At other neurology clinics, the number is as high as 20% and second only to headaches as the reason for seeking help.

To determine if a condition is functional, neurologists identify symptoms that don't match with physiological movement disorders. In Boylan's case, the cyst was on the right side of her brain, which meant it should only cause symptoms on the left side of her body. The right leg weakness she experienced at tai chi, for instance, didn't fit with this.

Then there are a series of tests that can help determine if movements are genuinely involuntary. One group of tests is designed to distract a patient. A patient with a left arm tremor, as was the case with Boylan, might be asked to extend that arm out and then use the hand on the other arm to tap out a sequence of numbers.

As the neurologist calls out for one tap, four taps, two taps and so on, he or she is watching to see if the tremor on the left side stops as the patient focuses on the tapping.

When Louis performed these tests on Boylan, she knew exactly what he was assessing. She administered the same tests to her own patients. To Boylan, the fact Louis was even doing the tests meant he had already concluded some of her symptoms were psychogenic. "I knew I was going to fail," she said later, adding that the tests are not always a valid indicator.

"I tried so hard to do things properly that it can look extreme." Louis observed that Boylan's tremor stopped when she was distracted. "If something is truly involuntary, it should persist whether someone is paying attention or not," Louis told me. He agreed with Boylan that the tests are not foolproof, but said that they are useful in evaluating a case.

In his initial assessment of Boylan, Louis referenced the brain cyst and possible medication-induced effects as well as the possibility that "something else is going on here." The difficulty, he noted, was "piecing it all together."

To help solve this puzzle, with Louis' encouragement, Boylan consulted two neurosurgeons.

The first, at Columbia Presbyterian, wrote the cyst might be playing a role in her tremors but warned surgery should only be considered as a "last resort." The second, at Mount Sinai, was skeptical the cyst was playing a role, writing, "It is difficult for me to pin the presence of this cystic lesion on her worsening symptoms."

After the appointments with the surgeons, Boylan returned to see Louis on Nov. 14, 2013. Louis told her he saw some "psychiatric overlay" in her symptoms and said there may be something "organic beneath a lot of overlay," according to his notes.

He estimated that perhaps 70% of her symptoms were psychiatric in nature. He doubted the brain cyst was causing her rapidly worsening symptoms. It "doesn't fit," he wrote. He noted Boylan "was not happy about this but seems to have accepted it during subsequent emails/phone calls."

Louis told me that Boylan's case was "very complicated" because some of her symptoms and the cyst in her brain were rare. "Her syndrome is difficult to neatly put in one box," he said. "That is why she has defied diagnosis and had a difficult time."

A psychogenic diagnosis, he said, is hard for patients because "there is a feeling with people that it is not real, it is all in our head and imaginary and undervalues and devalues what they are going through. No one wants that."

While Parkinson's is treated with medications such as levodopa, patients determined to have a functional or psychogenic condition are often prescribed psychological regimens such as cognitive behavioral therapy. Louis said he has worked successfully with a Columbia psychiatrist to treat functional patients.

"We have had patients unable to walk who were walking out two weeks later," he said. Louis said he discussed Boylan's case with her psychiatrist to share his evaluation of her situation and to coordinate medications. Her psychiatrist referred her to behavior therapy, Boylan said. "I did a round," she said. "It helped me tolerate problems but did not change them."

The more Boylan tried to convince others that the cyst was causing her problems, the more she felt she was viewed with suspicion. It became an obsession. Louis once remarked to Boylan that no one in the world knew as much about the square inch of brain where the cyst was located as she did.

Despite their clashes, Boylan respected Louis. When he delivered his diagnosis, it caused her to second-guess her theory about the cyst. She also believed that some of her doctors used her bipolar disorder to cast doubt on her complaints.

Her symptoms worsened and the stress overwhelmed her. On Dec. 9, she was admitted to the emergency room at St. Luke's Hospital with severely elevated blood pressure and stress-induced cardiomyopathy, a heart muscle disease that makes it harder to pump blood. When a cardiologist inquired if she was under stress, Boylan tearfully told her, "My doctors think I am hysterical."

As 2014 wore on, Boylan needed increased doses of levodopa to get the relief she first experienced when self-treating her double vision. It was a vicious circle. She needed the medicine to help with her with her lack of balance, which was causing her to fall, as well as her vision and left arm tremor. But the side effects from the medicine were severe.

On a Sunday afternoon in September 2014, Boylan stumbled out of a taxicab onto the sidewalk in front of the emergency room at NewYork-Presbyterian/Columbia University Medical Center. A couple of ambulance workers noticed she was having difficulty and helped her into a wheelchair.

Boylan was gaunt. She had lost more than 30 pounds since the beginning of the year. In the preceding days she slept little. Her body was twisting up in uncomfortable and unusual positions, making it hard to walk.

Her head jerked and her knees pushed together as she bent forward. She was unable to control the movements. In a brief video taken after she was admitted to the hospital, Boylan leaned against a wall with her head slumped awkwardly to the side as she waited to use a bathroom.

To the doctors who attended to Boylan, her condition was disturbing. They knew her as an accomplished neurologist who trained and mentored a new generation of doctors. She was a familiar face at Columbia, having done her medical residency there in the late 1990s. On this day, Boylan appeared paranoid and agitated. She argued with doctors about medication and their assessment of her condition. She complained that her husband thought she was crazy.

Her case defied an easy diagnosis. "She is a quite complicated movement disorders patient," one of the treating physicians at Columbia noted.The attending neurologist at the hospital that weekend thought Boylan was suffering from "mild psychosis" with contributing factors that included fatigue and the side effects of medication.

The doctors noted Boylan recently received a distressing email about a former patient who was dying; the implication was that this was a possible source of a psychogenic effect. Louisa Gilbert, a friend of Boylan's, said that when she arrived at the hospital she found doctors treating Boylan as a "psych case."

Boylan left the hospital after one night. In the following weeks, her condition worsened. She stopped working and was largely homebound. Her diet was poor, consisting primarily of ice cream and grapefruit juice, and she continued to lose weight. She was again having trouble reading and developed severe writer's cramp that she attributed to the brain cyst.

Boylan grew dependent on others to take care of her, including Gilbert, whom she first met at boarding school. A professor of social work at Columbia University, Gilbert always admired Boylan for her resiliency. Boylan went through her last two years of medical school while a single parent. She never missed work. Now there were days when Gilbert would show up at Boylan's apartment and find her friend writhing on the floor, unable to get up.

"It was so bewildering," Gilbert said. "What the hell is going on?"

By December, Boylan was spending hours lying on the floor of her apartment while sipping orange juice to speed up the absorption of the levodopa she was taking to stave off muscle spasms. She was now separated from her husband; they would later divorce. Alone and unable to work, Boylan despaired and made plans for suicide. "I had and am still having emotional meltdown over this loss of profession/vocation/self-definition," she wrote in an email to her brother, Ross, in California.

Ross and Laura Boylan were the only children of a corporate lawyer and a homemaker. For most of their youth they lived in an apartment near the Metropolitan Museum of Art on Manhattan's Upper East Side. Their mother suffered from severe mental illness and was hospitalized a number of times. Their father was an alcoholic. The couple often argued. Laura was happiest when she was out of the apartment, and she often spent summers away from the city.

The Boylan siblings both attended boarding school at Phillips Academy in Andover, Massachusetts, but rarely interacted there. Ross was two years older and each of them moved in their own circles. Laura returned to New York City to attend Barnard College. Ross went on to Harvard University and then moved permanently to the west coast.

In her December 2014 email to her brother, Boylan wrote "bad news" in the subject line. She said the brain cyst was causing "more and more problems." She shared that she gave up clinical practice because of "fatigue, stamina, vision and other problems." She said there was a "small possibility of neurosurgery" but she wasn't sure it was worth the risk, and she doubted any surgeon would take the chance anyway. She said her symptoms were getting progressively worse and there was no cure.

Ross Boylan responded with a short note that ended with a touch of optimism. "The future is not written," he wrote.

The email from his sister caught Ross Boylan off guard. "I thought she was doing OK," he said in an interview. "Then she sends me this email, oh by the way every single sphere of my life is collapsing." The doctors she consulted seemed to be uniform in their view that her brain cyst was irrelevant and that removing it would be pointless and probably dangerous, Ross Boylan said. "It's impossible to operate, and nothing could be done about it," he said. Most concerning, it seemed to him that the "fight had gone out" of his sister.

Ross Boylan is a research statistician at the University of California, San Francisco, and his department frequently works with doctors at the medical school there. Among all the specialists at the university, he figured there must be one who could help his sister. He didn't tell Laura that he was going to try to help. He was afraid she would tell him not to bother, and he didn't want to get her hopes up in the event his efforts failed.

On a webpage for the university neurology department, Boylan came across a group photo that included his boss. It turned out his boss had done some statistical work for the research team of neurosurgeon Michael Lawton. An introduction was made. Ross Boylan gave Lawton what information he had about his sister's condition, and within days Laura Boylan was in contact with the surgeon by phone and email.

"My hunch is that operating on the cyst will help and I am ready to proceed," Lawton wrote her. "You can appreciate that we surgeons like to be certain that our efforts are going to be curative, and in your case I can't be sure. Nonetheless, I think this operation will be safe and I am ready to move forward whenever you are."

Boylan decided to go ahead with the surgery and booked a flight to San Francisco.

Lawton told me that the cyst was located in an area of brain circuitry that is disturbed in Parkinson's patients and could be the cause of her movement disorders and double vision. "It fits," he said. "It's right where that kind of lesion would produce those symptoms." Nonetheless, he said he cautioned Boylan the procedure could be done perfectly with no complications yet have no therapeutic effect.

Louis said he wasn't certain if the surgery was a good idea. "I deferred to the surgeon," he said. "There was little margin of error, and that made it a very complex decision." Others close to Boylan were concerned about the speed in which the decision to operate was made and that Boylan decided to go ahead before even meeting with Lawton in person.

Boylan herself confessed in an email to a colleague days before the operation that she felt "in over my head" in arranging the surgery and was "beginning to think this is not a good idea."

via PixaBay

On Jan. 9, 2015, Lawton and his team performed a nearly five-hour craniotomy on Boylan in which part of the bone in her skull was removed to expose her brain. The cyst was drained and a piece cut out to prevent it from accumulating fluid in the future.

Boylan was worse off in the weeks after the surgery. The awkward, twisting movements persisted. She couldn't use her right arm. She didn't know if she would recuperate to a life worth living.

About a month after the surgery, Boylan saw neurologist Rebecca Gilbert at NYU Langone Medical Center. Boylan arrived for the appointment wearing an eye patch and an arm sling.

Gilbert's notes of the encounter make it clear she thought Boylan's symptoms, even after the surgery, might be psychogenic. A right side tremor was "inconsistent" and abnormal movements were "variable and erratic" and only "present during the formal exam."

In contrast, when "patient is telling her story, there are no abnormal involuntary movements." Gilbert wrote that she was "very concerned that at least part of this neurologic picture is psychogenic in nature."

By mid-March, just a month later, Boylan's condition improved significantly. On March 21, she sent an email to Lawton with the subject line "have turned a corner." She said her symptoms were improving and she was "back out and about in the world."

She told him he had "given me my life back." She also criticized those who questioned the wisdom of her decision to undergo the operation. "I confess that, in accord with my own pre-existing bias, some neurology pals have thought I must have found a cowboy who took a lucky long shot," Boylan wrote. "I correct them carefully in detail."

Ten days later, Boylan saw Gilbert for a follow up appointment. Gilbert wrote that Boylan "returns looking very well. She feels well neurologically and psychiatrically. She attributes her improvement to the surgery." Gilbert declined comment on Boylan's case.

By June, Boylan was back to work.

On a Sunday morning this spring, Boylan sits at a conference table in the neurology department at Bellevue Hospital in Manhattan, the country's oldest public hospital. The room is sparse save for a large, formal portrait of the former head of neurosurgery. The painting does not escape Boylan's notice. Like many of the leading figures in neurology, the former official is a white male.

Boylan, 57, is dressed casually in black pants and a flower-print blouse. A lanyard with a Bellevue identification tag hangs from her neck. On this morning, she is the attending neurologist, overseeing medical residents. In addition to Bellevue, Boylan does part-time stints at a hospital in Duluth, Minnesota, and a VA facility in Albany. She has regained the weight she lost when her illness was at its worst, as well as the mental sharpness that dulled during that time.

Across the table, a resident briefs her about a woman who arrived in the emergency room the day before. The exchange is thick with medical terms, but there is a clear point to the back and forth: They are trying to determine if the woman's symptoms are functional. The patient complained of a generalized burning sensation.

That's the type of vague complaint that could point to a psychogenic diagnosis. On the other hand, the resident said the patient reported having problems with her coordination, but not with her strength. People with functional disorders might also indicate they were weak, because they tend to have a wide array of complaints.

When the resident pulls up a scan of the woman's brain on a screen mounted on the wall, Boylan points to an area that she describes as a "little bent" with a "kink in it." This is potential evidence, she says, of a cerebral fluid leak. The woman recently underwent an epidural injection and fluid leaks are a known complication of the procedure. Boylan talks to the patient and comes away confident a leak is the problem. The remedy is intense rehydration. The patient improves, and is released the next day.

Afterward, Boylan said her own experience has prompted her to evaluate cases more carefully. She said she also has to guard against failing to recognize cases that may, in fact, be psychogenic. "I have to be careful not to lead the patient," she said.

After her surgery, Boylan requested copies of her medical records from most of the doctors who treated her over the prior five years. She was angered to find that several of them highlighted her history of bipolar disorder — in some cases it was the first item entered — and discounted the role of the brain cyst in her symptoms.

Boylan believes that many of her doctors discounted the brain cyst because of a predisposition toward diagnosing psychogenic conditions in women, and that her case is symptomatic of gender bias in the field of neurology.

"I don't believe I would be treated this way if I was a man," she said. By sharing her experience publicly, Boylan is determined to counter what she views as an ingrained suspicion of symptoms reported by women that dates back to the use of the word "hysterical" to demean them as emotionally and physically weak and prone to exaggeration.

She calls it a "pervasive and potentially lethal bias" in neurology.Gender inequality is rife in neurology. Female neurologists were last in pay and had the biggest salary gap between men and women, in a 2016 survey of salaries by specialty and gender at medical schools.

The American Academy of Neurology has had only one female president in its 71-year history even though women now constitute 40% of the professional society's membership. Female neurologists are also disproportionately underrepresented in awards handed out by the academy, according to a study last year. In 24 of the 28 years studied, the recipients of the academy's lifetime achievement awards did not include a single woman.

The more difficult question is whether this inequality spills over to clinical practice. Boylan received care from both male and female specialists, and her medical records are devoid of outright indications of gender bias. Boylan said female neurologists are trained "in a paradigm of thinking generated by men for men" in which the same symptoms are viewed differently in men and women.

Louis said there was no gender bias in his evaluation of Boylan. He said functional disorders are "far more common" in women and "if a person is that gender I am more comfortable with that diagnosis." Still, gender is "only one of many, many pieces of information" used to make a diagnosis, he said.

Dr. Sarah Lidstone, a specialist in functional movement disorders at Toronto Western Hospital, said it is "impossible to say" that gender bias doesn't exist in diagnoses of this condition. "That does factor into that." Still, she said, there appear to be real gender differences. "We don't know why. It's complicated."

Researchers are working to figure out whether women are disproportionately diagnosed with functional disorders.

"We don't know what is right or the whole truth necessarily," said Dr. Mark Hallett, a senior investigator at the National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke. He said one study underway is looking at whether women suffer more childhood trauma, particularly sexual abuse, than men and if that is a cause of functional disorders.

He said he didn't believe that gender bias played a significant role in the fact that women receive the diagnosis more often than men, and he said other explanations may include hormonal differences between the sexes or that women may be more likely to seek treatment.

It's impossible to know for certain how Boylan got better. The workings of the mind are complex and our understanding of diseases of the brain and of psychology is constantly evolving. It may be that, as Louis suspected, a combination of factors was at work that include both a psychogenic component and the brain cyst.

"To me, where she is now is nothing short of a miracle," said Boylan's friend, Gilbert.

I asked Lawton if Boylan might have experienced a placebo effect from the surgery. While that can happen, he said, Boylan's relief and turnaround "was pretty significant to the point that it outlasted the typical duration of most placebo effects which I think run their course."

Louis said he believes the surgery "did do some good" and at a minimum removed a cyst that was in a dangerous position. But he is not persuaded it is the main reason for Boylan's turnaround. He suspects many of her symptoms were functional, and sometimes patients with that diagnosis get better over time.

Boylan is convinced her cyst and reactions to medicine to treat the symptoms caused by it were the primary sources of her illness. She views her story as a cautionary tale: She was a woman with means, a degree in medicine and a cyst in her brain. Still, she said, "that did not spare me from being cast as hysterical."

True


Life can be bleak, so we’re going to be celebrating the small joys while we can—whether that’s a sweet snack that boosts your mood (courtesy of our friends at All In), or a dad joke so epic you'll hurt your eyes from rolling them so hard. These momentary mood boosters are everywhere you look—you just have to be able to find them underneath all the noise. And that’s where we come in.

Consider this weekly web series your cheat sheet to the best of the Internet—not just random memes to make you laugh, but examples of people truly finding something extraordinary in the mundane. Each Friday we'll be delivering five pieces of media that allow you to stop for a second, take a breath, and feel just a little bit brighter among the daily stress—and this week, in honor of Father's Day, it's dad-themed.

Ready to smile? Here we go.

1.The "soulmated so hard" trend

@breezeb3a

I’ll never recover from losing you 💓

♬ The Winner Is... Version - DeVotchKa

This is a TikTok trend that’s both wholesome and, at times, actually jaw-dropping. The premise is this: Pets can be our soulmates, and sometimes we “soulmate” so hard that our pets leave a lifelong impression on us. This trend has people showing how big of an impression their pets have made on them, even after they’ve crossed the rainbow bridge. In one video, user Brianna Kay shares an ultrasound of her baby with what looks like the outline of her dog kissing the baby on the forehead. In another video, an owner asks her soulmate cat to send her a sign from beyond the grave that she is at peace. The response (here) will shock you.

2. Dudes getting flowers

Why is it that men (traditionally speaking) are the ones who give flowers, and not usually the ones who get them? We don’t have a good answer for that, but it’s clearly time to flip the script. This week, our friends from All In are hitting the streets of New York and delivering bouquets to men, and they are absolutely loving it. Let’s make this a regular thing.

3. A new grandpa gets good news  

@ellelauricella In my feels today remembering my dad’s reaction to meeting my baby ❤️ We named his middle name after my father and kept it a surprise my whole pregnancy. This was one of the happiest moments of my whole life. #postpartum #dad #dadsoftiktok #dadanddaughter #grandson #firstgrandbaby #birthvlog #hospitalbirth #momsoftiktok #fyp #firsttimemom ♬ Stuff We Did (from 'Up') - Piano Version - your movie soundtrack

Just in time for Father's Day! There’s almost no better way to honor your dad than naming a new baby after him, which is exactly what happens in this video. It’s almost impossible not to cry (happy tears!) seeing this new grandpa learn the good news from his daughter, who’s already weepy from postpartum hormones. (We’re not crying, you’re crying.)

4. Dad's loving dogs

@aubree.avery I had to make a PowerPoint to convice my parents to let me get her & now she is four years old and my parents beg me everyday to let them keep her. #dogmom #doodle #doodlesoftiktok #dogs ♬ Kiss me Sixpence None The Richer - whitelinesprettybabyy

Speaking of adorable dads: It seems like there’s this universal experience where when someone brings a pet into a household, the dad of the household will refuse to bond with it (at least at first). TikTok has latched on to this truth and is now flipping the script, showcasing dads who initially refused to accept the family pet and are now treating it like their precious firstborn. Search “dads and the dog they didn’t want” on TikTok and you’ll find some hilarious examples (like this dad, testing every couch inside a furniture store to make sure he’s able to adequately rub the dog’s belly from his seat on the sofa).

5. A dog who just cannot handle a prank 

@haleyandthepets spoiler bro got mad instantly #foryou #foryoupage #dogs #fyp #dunkindadawg #viral ♬ snoopy von - joro.mixes

We can never share enough dog content, right? (That was a rhetorical question, because the answer is of course not.) Dogs are adorable. They’re hilarious. And they have some very strong feelings. In this video, one easygoing dog gets his “nose stolen” as a prank, and every time he finds out, he shows his owner that he is absolutely not having it. Give that baby her nose back!

For even more “extra”-ordinary moments, come find us on social media (@upworthy) or on upworthy.com!

For scrumptious snacks that add an extra boost of joy to your day, be sure to check out All In.

via zoetnet/Flickr, Ewen Roberts/Flickr and Tom Hodgkinson/Flickr
Some American tourists enjoying the sights

Americans have a style and personality all their own, which isn’t a bad thing. It’s just noticeable when they travel aboard. Americans often stand out because of their outgoing personalities. They are friendly and enjoy having casual conversations with strangers.

This is an endearing trait to a lot of people in more reserved cultures, although it can also come off as a little brash.

An American characteristic that isn’t quite endearing to people in other countries is that they can be rather loud. In Europe, one can always notice the Americans in the restaurant because they can be heard from across the room.

One Reddit user wanted to know the specific ways that Americans stand out when traveling abroad, so they asked the AskReddit subreddit: “What’s an obvious sign that someone is an American?”


american tourists, american culture, americans abroad, americans, USA, tourists, travel, europe, cultureIt may not be quite this obvious, but Americans do stand out.Giphy

The post was popular, receiving nearly 6,000 responses in just 6 days. The most popular ones described how Americans' unique personalities, style of dress, dental hygiene and body language make them easy to spot.

Here are 14 “obvious” signs that someone is an American.

1. Posture

american tourists, american culture, americans abroad, americans, USA, tourists, travel, europe, cultureAmericans slouch and lean.Giphy

"Apparently, the CIA trains American agents to not lean on things if they go undercover in foreign countries because Americans lean on anything they can while standing around," one user wrote.

"I bet MI6 trains British agents to lean on everything if they go undercover in America because Americans lean on anything they can while standing around," joked another.

Shockingly, this is actually true. The "American lean" is well-documented and, yes, a former CIA chief has said publicly that it's something the agency addresses with its operatives to help them blend in.

2. The date

"MMDDYYYY," a user said.

The way Americans write the date seems normal and commonplace when you're in the US, but around the world, we're practically the only ones who do it that way. Similarly, only a small handful of countries outside of the US use the imperial system of measure.

Writing the date or using feet and inches are a dead giveaway!

3. Distances are different

"Anything under 4 hours is 'close by," someone suggested.

"Everything in Europe is around the corner if you're from the US. I can drive the whole day and not leave my state, but in Europe, I can pass through 4 countries in that same time frame," said another.

The massive geography of the United States has a big affect on how we see distance. It shows up when we travel to other countries that are more densely packed together.

4. They're polite to servers

"In the touristy cafe-restaurant I worked at:

If they asked me for the nicest spot we had

If they asked me my recommendation without seeing the menu first

I would walk to the table, and they would say right away ‘hey, how are you doing?’ This one threw me off a lot at first. Why is this person asking me how I'm doing?? I'm just there to take the order. I got used to it, and I think they found my awkwardness cute.

They would ask my name when I greeted them and took their order.

I'm Northern European.," explained one user.

"It’s under-appreciated just how polite, friendly, and sincere Americans are in general. It blew my mind the first time I came to the US, and I love that my children are growing up with those same values," said another.

You might expect to hear that Americans are rude and entitled when traveling, but that's not necessarily the case! In America, some friendly rapport with your waiter is expected, and Americans tend to be a more outgoing bunch that love to engage. That makes them stand out in European countries, in particular, where restaurant service is meant to be professional and efficient rather than charismatic.


5. The water bottles

american tourists, american culture, americans abroad, americans, USA, tourists, travel, europe, cultureAmericans love huge water bottles.Giphy

"I was told, 'Americans carry water bottles around like they're worried they'll never have access to clean water ever again," one user said.

"I don't care what anyone says. If you think carrying a water bottle when walking a lot is weird, you're probably slightly dehydrated all the time and are just desensitized to it. You seriously need to drink water frequently if you want to be ideally healthy," said another.

The water bottle fad is uniquely American, for better or worse. Whether it's a Yeti, a Stanley, an Owalla, or something else, you can bet if someone is swinging a massive water bottle wherever they walk, they're an American.

6. Smiling

"I was in Germany this past summer, and I realized smiling at everyone you make eye contact with is very American. When I went to London on the same trip, they seemed less weirded out by it but would awkwardly return the smile. I was taught to always start with a disarming smile. Never realized it was American," said one person.

7. "More ice, please."

american tourists, american culture, americans abroad, americans, USA, tourists, travel, europe, cultureAmericans love tons of ice in their drinks.Giphy

"I spent a year in Europe completely iceless to the point I forgot that was a thing. I stopped at a bar in Chicago fresh off the plane and not only did I get free tap water, but water with ice. I instantly felt at home," added one person.

There is a long and fascinating history involving someone called "The Ice King" behind why Americans, and so few other cultures, love to put tons of ice in our drinks. Needless to say, it makes us stand out like a sore thumb when traveling.

8. Personal space

"As an American man, I’ve been told repeatedly by European and Asian friends that we simply take up space (not by being fat) as though we’re entitled to it. Men in other countries apparently don’t claim the same personal space we do," one person offered.

You mean manspreading? Apparently, other cultures don't do that.

9. White teeth

american tourists, american culture, americans abroad, americans, USA, tourists, travel, europe, cultureAmericans value ultra-white teeth.Giphy

"It’s even more bizarre that they assume we have braces or bleach our teeth because they’re straight and white. I have naturally straight white teeth. I brush them twice a day so they stay white. I don’t do anything special to them, but I remember being in London and some similar-aged students literally making fun of me for my teeth… it’s true that they don’t naturally look like headstones in an ancient graveyard, but there’s no need to make fun," someone added.

Imagine getting made fun of for having white teeth! For one reason or another, American culture places high value on having extremely white teeth. We all know the old jokes about British teeth, but some findings show that while Americans' teeth may be whiter, Brits may be healthier overall. Something to think about.

10. Casual dress

"My friend went to Germany recently, and what people said about Americans is you can spot them a mile away because they’re the ones wearing pajamas in public. Apparently, in other countries, at least Germany, they dress a little more formally and in less baggy clothes than we do in America," someone added.

Activewear, sweatpants, pajamas — we love to be comfortable! But it does make us a bit obvious when we're out and about in other countries.

11. Baseball hats

american tourists, american culture, americans abroad, americans, USA, tourists, travel, europe, cultureAmericans wear hats... everywhere.Giphy

"Baseball cap... even on an infant riding in a pram," a user suggested.

Baseball hats are common in many countries around the world, but most people internationally only wear them outside. If someone's wearing a cap inside or at a restaurant, it's a safe bet that person is American.

12. Shoes

"Americans are shoe snobs (they don’t think they are, but they are). Setting aside wealthier business types, Americans generally wear more on-brand, on-trend, high-quality shoes than others," someone said.

13. They're loud

american tourists, american culture, americans abroad, americans, USA, tourists, travel, europe, cultureAmericans' default volume is loud.Giphy

"That was my first thought. Americans yell at each other in normal conversation in public. I noticed it years ago in Europe, and now I can’t stand it in the US," another user added.

Now there's an unsurprising revelation! Just like our tendency to take up space, Americans seem to have less awareness of those around them when it comes to conversation volume, as well.

14. Occupation matters

"Immediately asking someone what they do for a living when meeting them. Our jobs and work are our entire identity," one person said.

"I hate that about American culture. I'm an American and recently became a SAHM, so I don't have an answer to 'What do you do for a living?' Half the time, I add the caveat, ‘Oh, my last job was with Apple,’ so that I'm not written off as an unemployed ‘loser.’ But it really is dumb to determine a person's worth by what they do in order to afford food and shelter," added another.

There are huge differences in work culture between America and other countries. They're so big and pervasive that they show up not just while we're working, but in the way we interact with others. For example, in Europe it's far less common to be friends with your coworkers. People value the purpose they find in work and the results, but are happy to keep the majority of their life separate from their career.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

Pop Culture

Woman tries to sell her 'blue' chair online, sparking a fierce color debate

We might have another "blue dress, gold dress" situation on our hands.

She was overwhelmed by the amount of responses saying she was wrong.

Since elementary school, we’ve been taught the general consensus of what each color looks like. Roses are red, the sky is blue, grass is green. That sort of thing. And still, more and more evidence comes along to suggest that no matter what sort of collective reality we all agree upon, color is just one of those things that is very much up to personal perception.

This can lead to some, well, interesting, if not intense interactions. Many of us still have PTSD from the whole “blue and black or white and gold dress” debate, after all.

Which brings us to Kristin Hughes, who aimed to sell her extra armchair—which she knew to be blue—on Facebook Marketplace. However, as she recalled on TikTok, things got confusing when the potential buyer insisted that the chair was gray.

Being a woman of the modern age, Hughes naturally decided to get a second opinion from the Internet. She even set it up next to her couch, which she also "always said was blue” to help obtain a fair assessment.

Let’s just say…the response wasn’t necessarily what she expected.

@im.krispy WHAT COLOR IS THIS CHAIR!!
♬ original sound - kristin

"It’s not only gray, it’s very freaking gray. 😂," one person wrote

Another echoed, "That is the grayest gray I’ve seen.”

Still another joked, “Is the blue in the room with us?”

“I hadn’t seen a single person say it was blue. I really did start spiraling,” Hughes told People in an interview. “I was shocked at the number of comments—but even more shocked that people were overwhelmingly saying the chair was gray. It had never crossed my mind that it wasn’t blue.”

In several subsequent videos, Hughes attempted to reclaim her sanity by pointing out several items in her home which she also thought were blue, of which many, many were in fact gray. Even with items she did correctly think were blue, she didn’t seem to notice how much different the shades of blue were from each other.

As reality began setting in, Hughes then recalled buying her mom a blue couch as a gift. When she called her mom to talk about her now viral moment, her mom informed her that she had, in fact, bought a gray couch.

“If you had a nickel for every time you bought a gray couch thinking it was blue, you’d have TWO nickels. Which isn’t a lot but weird it happened TWICE," one person quipped, referencing a Phineas and Ferb-induced meme.

Upon several people suggesting she might be colorblind, Hughes recorded herself taking the EnChroma color blindness test online, where she did get some questions wrong.

@im.krispy Results are in but the doctor will be the deciding factor 🤓
♬ original sound - kristin


The good news is: after her video went viral, Hughes has been offered help in several ways, from an in-person colorblind assessment to a free couch from Wayfair—one that’s actually blue! So, her being transparent and having a good sense of humor about it seems to have only paid off.

Though Hughes’ story feels unique, many do not learn that they are color blind until later in life. And while it’s normally something present early in a person's life, people can also develop color blindness when they are older, though it’s rare. All this to say, it’s not all that baffling that she went otherwise unaware until one fateful Facebook encounter.

That person, whom Hughes thanked for stopping her from living “a millennial gray life,” did end up getting that decidedly not blue chair. So, happy endings all around.

If you’d like to take your own EnChroma color blindness test, click here.

Russian novelist Leo Tolstoy.

Leo Tolstoy was a Russian novelist known for epic works such as War and Peace and Anna Karenina. His life experiences—from witnessing war to spiritual quests—profoundly influenced his writings and gave him profound insights into the human soul. His understanding of emotions, motivations and moral dilemmas has made his work stand the test of time, and it still resonates with people today.

Julian de Medeiros, a TikToker who shares his thoughts on philosophy, recently shared how Tolstoy knew if someone was highly intelligent—and his observation says something extraordinary about humanity.

intelligence, thinking, thought process, humanity, humansAn intelligent man's thought process.Canva Photos

“The more intelligent a person is, the more he discovers kindness in others,” Tolstoy once wrote. “For nothing enriches the world more than kindness. It makes mysterious things clear, difficult things easy, and dull things cheerful.”

@julianphilosophy

Intelligent people are kind #intelligent #intelligence #kindness #smart #tolstoy #men #women


De Medeiros boiled down Tolstoy’s thoughts into a simple statement: “Intelligent people are unafraid to be kind.” He then took things a step further by noting that Tolstoy believed in the power of emotional intelligence. "To have emotional intelligence is to see the good in other people, that is what Tolstoy meant, that to be intelligent is to be kind," he added.

It seems that, according to de Medeiros, Tolstoy understood that intelligent people are kind and perceptive of the kindness in others. The intelligent person is conscious of the kindness within themselves and in the world around them.

In a 2024 opinion piece for Inc., author and speaker Jeff Hayden cites organizational psychologist Adam Grant, who says, "Generosity isn't just a sign of virtue. It's also a mark of intelligence. Data: people with high IQs have more unselfish values, give more to charity, and negotiate better deals for others. They prioritize the long-term collective good over short-term self-interest. It's smarter to be a giver than a taker."

Hayden adds on to this statement, saying, "...You can also be smart enough to be generous, thoughtful, and kind. You can be smart enough to build people up instead of tearing them down. You can be smart enough to give before you receive (or better yet, with no expectation of reciprocation.) You can be smart enough to shift the credit from yourself to others."

kindness, intelligence, humanity, human condition, be kindKids showing kindness through sharing. Canva Photos

In other words, these findings certainly line up with what Tolstoy's take on the correlation between kindness and intelligence.

Through Tolstoy's musings, de Medeiros (and Hayden and Grant) makes a point that is often overlooked when people talk about intelligence: truly smart people are as in touch with their hearts as they are with their minds.

This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.

A father talking to his daughter.

Warning: The following article discusses child sexual abuse and may be upsetting to some readers.

Every parent wants their child to feel protected from any type of danger that may come their way. However, Lexi Koster, a Child Life Specialist and Certified Clinical Trauma Specialist with expertise in childhood sexual assault (CSA), says that parents should be careful how they talk about protecting their children from sexual abusers.

Koster believes that parents should refrain from telling their children that if they are touched inappropriately, they will take action against them, whether it means physical harm or getting the law involved. That doesn’t mean the parents shouldn't take appropriate action if something were to occur, but they shouldn’t talk about any potential punishment or retribution around their child.

@thebodysafetyexpert

#bodysafety #bodysafetyeducation #csaprevention #fyp #childprotection #childsafety #protectourkids #foryou #childsafetytips #protectourchildren #parenting101 #consciousparenting

“Kids will believe you when you say things like ‘If anybody ever touches your private parts, I will make sure something bad happens to them’ or ‘You will never see them again,’” she explains in a video on TikTok with over 190,000 views. “This is a big problem because kids are most often sexually abused by people they know and love, like family members.

“So if they think that you’re going to hurt this person, or send them away so that they never see them again, this might scare them into not disclosing to you and enduring this abuse for a very long time,” Koster continues. “Instead, if kids ask what will happen to this person, you can say ‘I’ll make sure they get the help they need from trusted professionals, but what happens to them is not your responsibility and it is not your fault.”

sad girl, paper dolls, blaonde little girl, young girl, arts and craftsA young girl playing with a paper doll.via Canva/Photos

Koster’s advice is based on one of the most disturbing facts about child abuse: often, the abuser is someone the family knows and trusts. According to Darkness to Light, an organization dedicated to ending child sexual abuse, more than 90% of abusers are people that children know, love, and trust. Thirty to forty percent of abusers are family members, and 50% are someone outside of the family that the child knows and trusts. Eighty-five percent of child abuse victims never report their abuse, and a big reason is that they are afraid of harming their abuser.

“This is why I get so frustrated when I see people fantasize about hurting (or worse) abusers. I get the emotional reaction, trust me, as a victim, I know, but these actions and rhetoric only make it harder for victims to feel able to come forward,” one of the TikTok commenters wrote. “This is the exact reason I never told my family. I was terrified of the consequences,” another added. “Double this with: Abusers often threaten their victims with the same line of things if not worse if they 'tell', and it's an absolute riptide current situation,” a commenter wrote.

soccer coach, co-ed soccer team, young girls and boys, coach and kids, sportsA soccer coach working with his team.via Canva/Photos

What are some signs that someone may be a child abuser?

The disturbing things about child abusers is that they, more often than not, are someone the child and family know well. So, how can we identify if someone is an abuser before something terrible happens? Koster says there are five red flags parents should look out for.

@thebodysafetyexpert

Replying to @tia_ftm i have a whole comprehensive resource on body safety for parents which i’ll share once I hit 1K! (I can’t post a link in my bio until that happens) Pls help me reach this goal!! ❤️ #bodysafety #bodysafetyeducation #csaprevention #fyp #foryou #childprotection #childsafety #childsafetytips #protectourkids #protectourchildren #consciousparenting #parenting101

Five red flags that someone may be a child abuser

1. Insisting on alone time

“First, is creating opportunities for or insisting on having alone time with a child. I've heard countless stories from parents about tutors, piano teachers, even grandparents getting defensive when the parents suggests that another adult should be present to monitor the activities. That is a huge red flag.”

2. Boundary pushing and manipulation

“This might look like a person insisting on babysitting your child because you really look like you need a break, or subtly testing boundaries like making inappropriate comments or jokes about or in front of children.”

3. Too-good-to-be-true complex

“They are available for absolutely any issue, day or night, for your family may sometimes even show up and offer this support unprovoked."

4. Downplaying or deflecting concerns

"Fourth is exhibiting behaviors where they're exerting some sort of control over a child. This might look like encouraging secrecy, which is a big no no, or engaging in excessive physical contact while ignoring a child's discomfort. They might do this in order to make you feel guilty for bringing it up in the first place, and may even use their status or favors that they've done for the child and family to quickly shut down concerns.”

5. Defensiveness

“Anytime someone gets defensive or makes you feel stupid for insisting that they practice body safety rules with your child, red flag, no good. My best advice to you is to trust your gut. If someone feels off or too good to be true, they probably are.”

The holes were for added speed and force, believe it or not.

Gen X childhoods are often portrayed as somewhat idyllic, filled with feral freedom and hours of screen-free adventures in nature. A certain amount of that portrayal is true, and yes, it was often as glorious as it sounds. But there were some not-so-great things about growing up Gen X and older, too, that might shock some of the younger folks.

For instance, corporal punishment in schools was common. Not only were teachers and administrators allowed to discipline kids, but they sometimes did it by hitting them with paddles. "Hacks" or "swats" or "licks" they were often called, with kids essentially being spanked—but with hard objects. Many people of a certain age have stories of kids being sent to the principal's office to endure a number of hacks by an adult who, for some baffling reason, felt it was perfectly acceptable—necessary, even—to beat a child with a heavy piece of wood.

gif, paddlin, corporal punishment, punishment, schoolthe simpsons paddle GIFGiphy

It's surreal to imagine it now, isn't it? A (now-deleted) photo shared on Reddit of a paddle with holes in it (for greater speed and force due to less air resistance) threw Gen Xers and any Boomers reading into a vivid memory spiral as people shared stories from their own experiences. Not everyone got the paddle—some got hit with yardsticks, switches, and other objects—but it's clear that corporal punishment (i.e., physical violence inflicted in the name of discipline) was commonplace during that era.

As people shared:

"My fifth grade teacher had one like this — he called it 'Count Whistler.'"

"The worse part is some student made it for credit in shop. That's the part I never got over."

"Ha! Yep. THAT thing! Good grief. Memory flood. Hung in Mr Flanagan's office beside the doorway. Fortunately, I was only a one-time recipient. Don't even remember why. Something minor and unintentional.

"But, the holes...THE HOLES! They possessed a mythical foreboding power, combining rough-shot aerodynamics, 1970s ambivalence, delivered randomly with casual sadistic intent!"

"I was never paddled but others were. One girl was so scared, she threw up on the principal. Good times."

corporal punishment, physical discipline, old-school disciplineDrawing depicting corporal punishment, Theodor Hosemann Prügelstrafe, 1842Public domain

"I got switched the 3rd day of kindergarten. Hated school every single day afterwards."

"I remember kids getting smacked on the palm with a yardstick in front of the class in kindergarten. They had to stand there with their palm up waiting for the blow. Seeing kindergarten age kids now I just can’t fathom how anyone could do that to a little kid."

"I was hit in the ass with a black-square metal device as punishment. It was In front of the whole school (we had to line up by class) by after recess. And yes by the school principal. And no it was not my fault. Still hurts to this day. More psychological than anything."

"I had severe ADHD (still do) and was paddled regularly, often harshly and for reasons I didn't understand. Eventually they gave up on the beatings and just stuck me in the hallway and forgot about me. That was when I actually started learning things, sneaking into the library to read whatever I could."

"Kids used to be paddled in front of school assemblies - it was terrible. It was the era of 'tough love', which gave cover to blatant abuse."

child, corporal punishment, discipline, parenting. schoolSome parents didn't allow schools to physically punish their kids.

If you're wondering how parents allowed schools to hit their children, some did and some didn't. There were often permission slips sent home requesting parents to consent to such "discipline" methods, and parental attitudes were all over the map.

"My school required a parent to sign a form allowing them to 'discipline' a student. My mom was 'Hell No!' My mom would have shown up and paddled them."

"I spent most of my life in the northeast, where this didn't happen, so imagine my surprise during my brief stint in a Florida school when I got caught chewing gum and was sent to the principal's office to be paddled. I told them they had better call my mother first, which they fortunately did.

My mother, who was not a woman to be trifled with, told them if they laid a finger on me they would be sorry beyond anything they could imagine and that we came from 'a civilized place' and she couldn't believe anyone thought it was okay for 'some old pervert to put his hands on a teenage girl's ass.' I did not get paddled."

woman saying no, refusing consent, nope, not happening, gifSome parents said "absolutely not" to corporal punishment.Giphy by NETFLIX

"My pops, who at the time did believe in a bit of corporal punishment for certain offenses, wrote them a nice note to go with the refusal which I only found out about years later. 'To whom it may concern, my penmanship sucks because the nuns at my school beat me for writing with my left hand even though I am naturally left handed. Not only do I deny you permission to strike my children I will send anyone who does so to the hospital.' Dad was actually a fairly chill guy but I have no doubt he meant every word."

"My school required the same and my mom informed me she was going to sign it as the principal insisted. At 8 years old I looked her straight in the eyes and said they would have to call the police cus I wouldn’t be going down without a fight. My mom did not end up signing it."

"At my elementary school they called them 'swat slips.' Well, I got one and was supposed to take it home for my parents to sign. Being a 9 year old girl, I was not down for a swat from my middle aged vice principal. The next day, I returned it unsigned and declared that my dad said he would discipline me at home. The school called my dad to verify this. He did take care of it at home and beat my bare ass with his leather belt. I should have taken the swat."

As of 2024, corporal punishment was still legal in 17 states and practiced in 14, according to the National Education Association. Six additional states have not expressly outlawed it. While the violent discipline method has fallen out of favor for the most part, it's not gone.

Roughly 69,000 students received corporal punishment in the 2017-18 school year, nearly 40,000 fewer than in 2013. The pandemic disrupting in-person schooling likely had an impact on the most recent number available—about 20,000 students in 2020-21—but even those numbers might be shocking to those of us who assume that paddling children had become a relic from a bygone era.

And lest there be any question as to whether the practice is bad, The World Health Organization has classified corporal punishment as “a violation of children’s rights to respect for physical integrity and human dignity, health, development, education and freedom from torture and other cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment or punishment.”

Of course, there are people who try to argue that moving away from corporal punishment is "what's wrong with kids these days," but there's a whole ocean of options in between beating a child and having no school discipline whatsoever. Fear of bodily harm is not a necessary component of learning how to behave in a civilized manner, and corporal punishment has been shown time and again to do more harm than good.

But we don't even need those studies to know that paddling kids was wrong. Reading through Gen Xers' responses to the paddle photo, it's clear that the vast majority aren't even remotely grateful for the experience, but rather appalled that it ever happened in the first place. Hitting a child with what is essentially a bat on the arms or legs or back would be considered child abuse, but hitting them on their bottom—which we tell kids is a private area—was somehow not child abuse? There's no way to make that make sense.

Thankfully, we've learned a lot over the decades, but the fact that these things are still used anywhere is shocking.