Mom shares the reason she's absolutely sure millennials will be the best grandparents ever
They've already learned what not to do.
Is society soon to receive an influx of top-tier, compassionate grandmothers?
A TikToker named Madison Barbosa made a video that resonated deeply with viewers. In it, the stay-at-home mom of two-under-two extolled the virtues of millennial moms and the kinds of grandmothers she predicts they’ll be.
“I think the best era of grandmas is yet to come,” she begins in the video, viewed close to half a million times.
“I feel like millennial grandmoms are going to be elite," Madison continues. "We know what not to do based on the majority of boomers. And that’s not to say I don’t love my grandmoms. My grandmoms are great. But the judgyness and the unnecessary, unwarranted comments—we know not to do that."
“And then our moms, our baby’s grandparents, they’re getting there but I just feel like we’re gonna be better,” she added.
Barbosa’s generation—millennials— are defined as the generation born between 1981 and 1996. Their parents are usually Boomers (1946-1964) or older Gen X (1965-1980) while their children are typically the generation dubbed Generation Alpha (2010-2025).
Honestly so proud to be a millennial mom and I’m certain we are gonna be incredible grandparents one day
Honestly so proud to be a millennial mom and I’m certain we are gonna be incredible grandparents one day 🙌🏻💯 #momminmads #millennialmom #momsoftiktok #relatablemom #momhumor
While it’s tempting to think Barbosa’s video is about how millennials-as-grandparents will behave toward their grandchildren, Barbosa’s video and its popularity seem to have more to do with the relationship between grandparents and their children. As a millennial navigating the frustrations of dealing with older generations, Barbosa says she and her cohort will understand how to best support their adult children in raising kids.
“We’re gonna anticipate what our kids need, we’re gonna be pushing them to get a break…pushing them to get out of the house, to go for a date night, say ‘We got the kids tonight, we got the kids.’ I just have this strong premonition that millennial grandmas are gonna be the best to come,” says Barbosa near the end of the video.
Commenters were quick to agree.
Baylee will always be there for her daughter.
“I absolutely can’t wait to be the village we so desperately need!” said a user named Noneya.
“Oh absolutely! I can’t wait to take care of my grandkids and truly help my children through parenthood—following their rules and boundaries,” wrote Jane D.
“My husband and I talk about this all the time! Our generation is going to ROCK this grandparent thing,” said It’s Me, Hannah.
The comments were quite vulnerable as well.
“Last night at 3am throw [sic] pure exhaustion tears I told my 4 month old daughter she’d never have to do this the hard way I’ll always be there if wanted,” wrote Baylee Vandegrift.
“Yes, like I can’t look at my daughter without wanting to do everything in my power for her. And it makes me sad about how I was raised,” said Christina.
If millennials are frustrated by the way their parents grandparent—there’s actually a 2021 study that explains the differences in the way grandparents treat their children versus their grandchildren.
A group of grandmothers were shown pictures of their grandchildren and then pictures of the grandchild’s same-sex parent (often the grandparent's own child). Imaging showed their brains lit up differently when showing their grandchildren versus their children. When shown their grandchildren, their emotional empathy centers were activated versus their cognitive empathy centers—which were activated when shown their adult children.
But just because there seems to be a bit of a biological limitation here doesn’t mean we are beholden to it. Isn’t that what growing and learning is about? If these millennials have their way, they will be leading the charge.
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