upworthy
Add Upworthy to your Google News feed.
Google News Button
Identity

Women explain what it's like to lose their youthful beauty and it's surprisingly empowering

The most common response seems to be "liberating."

Three older, stylish women facing the camera and smiling

Surface beauty comes with its own down sides.

Humans have long made much ado about beauty, so much so that the word has become loaded with pressures, especially for women. In addition to inspiring painters and poets, beauty is now a billion-dollar industry filled with countless beauty products peddled by beauty influencers that we have to contend with.

Who's considered "beautiful" is quite subjective, but some people are just universally attractive. Women in particular may spend a lot of time and money to enhance or create their beauty and some simply have naturally beautiful features. But regardless of how they got there, we've all known (and often envied) women who turn heads when they walk into a room.

We also know that kind of beauty comes with a certain kind of power to attract and influence. But what about when that surface beauty starts fading with age? What happens when the supple skin starts shriveling, full pouts thin out, perimenopause weight hits and women who were once considered young and beautiful no longer turn heads?


Someone asked the AskOldPeople Reddit group, "If you were beautiful when you were younger, what has it been like to lose its power?" and many of the answers were unexpectedly empowering. Rather than being sad about losing their looks, so many women have found being not young and beautiful anymore freeing. Here are some of the most popular responses:

"Better to lose my looks than my brains, or my compassion, or my curiosity. I had my 'hot girl' phase. It was fun but it was nothing to build a life around."

"I’ve likened it to driving a fancy car. Fun, but hardly life changing. And TBH there’s a certain comfort to the anonymity of late-middle-age. I don’t miss the leers and the low-grade-ever-present-threat associated with being young and beautiful."

"48 year old woman here and completely invisible to the majority of society. I love it! It's been the most freeing thing in the world!!"

"Yes! Freedom is the first word I think of about this."

"Yes!! Totally agree! I used to get a lot of attention and couldn't even have conversations with men without them thinking it was some sort of invitation. I was that combo of good looking but not too good looking and a friendly personality. Now I get very little attention from men and dang is it nice. It's less about losing looks I think and more about losing youth. I am now in my early 40s and by far the happiest, most comfortable I've ever been."

"And the sheer confidence that comes with the years and not giving a rip anymore is just 🀌chef’s kiss*. I love my 40’s. You put an obstacle in front of a group of 40 year old women, get back cause we’re tearing it apart. We get shit done and don’t give a an f who’s in our way. It feels a bit like a super power to be honest. Give that back for the youthful beauty of my 20’s? Pffffttrtttt hail nah."

"Another middle aged woman here, chiming in to agree that it's awesome to be invisible to the type of men that can't leave young, attractive women alone."

"Well said! It's been wonderful to just slowly disappear into the background."

"Omg I love being invisible! It is like a superpower. I was very pretty when younger, and now I don’t have to be self conscious bc no one is staring."

"Truth! It’s been like gaining a superpower for me!"

"Yes, while some of my peers were complaining about becoming invisible, I have found it very freeing."

"I still feel great and I no longer have to make conversation with random dudes who feel entitled to my time."

"Exactly! I joke that now that I look like an older mom or grandma, I can be friendly and nice without having to worry about the result. No more weird stalker responses, no more harassment for my phone number and then being called a bitch. I can just respond how I want….use the term honey….whatever….get that extra service because everyone likes mommy love….with no ick to worry about."

"Liberating! Yeah sure now and then it’s … I’m trying to think of a word but honestly it doesn’t bother me. I love it in fact. I like blending in with the crowd. I like not being singled out and hassled and burdened with other people's desires or being accused of being in love with someone’s boyfriend just because perhaps I was a bit too vivacious."

"I once sat next to a beautiful girl after dancing at EDC and asked her if she ever thought her beauty at times was a burden. She told me that she felt like she lost female friendships because some of her friends thought that she was trying to sleep with their boyfriends. She said she felt lonely and just wanted to be friends β€” and that part of it was very unfair to her."

"I think with age the focus moves from external validation to internal validation from the self. A kind of inner beauty radiates outward from that deep self acceptance. When I was young and aesthetically pleasing to the world, I enhanced my youthful beauty, unnecessarily with all the cosmetic accoutrements I was brainwashed into believing were needed to feel worthy of the male gaze. Now, in my wizened self I feel a confidence in my beauty that transcends aesthetics. I no longer care for the male gaze, nor do I seek it. I have become worthy of more than that, even without enhancement."

"It’s a slow process. You don’t notice day to day. When it finally happens you’re old enough to understand that beauty is just a creation. You’ll always be beautiful to those who love you."

"Back it up with knowledge, skills, experience, wisdom so when your beauty fades, you will have a soft cushion to land on. That's what I did, and it works."

"I am still a good looking person. But I've noticed that...

1) the people my age who will be attracted to me are also older and they learned a long time ago that certain things ain't gonna fly like they did 20 or 30 years ago.
2) the power of being pretty is dependent on other people being brainlessly susceptible to pretty. Older, wiser people place value on things beyond just a pretty face so it's going to take more than that to get any special treatment.
3) my personality and confidence have always yielded the most power."

"There’s a whole bunch of power in knowing who you are what you’ve accomplished and being happy with yourself and your life. That’s 100 times more powerful than turning a few heads. Everyone grows older, everyone has their looks fade to a certain extent, but what’s inside you is what makes you powerful. This you never lose.

Be a good person of character and you will always have the power."

"I think with age the focus moves from external validation to internal validation from the self. A kind of inner beauty radiates outward from that deep self acceptance. When I was young and aesthetically pleasing to the world, I enhanced my youthful beauty, unnecessarily with all the cosmetic accoutrements I was brainwashed into believing were needed to feel worthy of the male gaze. Now, in my wizened self I feel a confidence in my beauty that transcends aesthetics. I no longer care for the male gaze, nor do I seek it. I have become worthy of more than that, even without enhancement."

Of course, some people have had a harder time with losing their surface beauty than others, for various reasons. But everyone learns at some point that looks aren't something to create your personality around or rely on for attention or connection with people. As one woman wrote:

"I was sad to become invisible in my 40s. In my 50s, I upped my game (clothes, shoes, got an actual haircut) and became visible again. I didn’t regain the power of beauty, but at least I was visible. I was a bit sad about it. People didn’t think I was so fascinating anymore. I realized that maybe I never was, but people wanted to talk to me because of how I looked. Oh well. It was nice while it lasted. But it’s ultimately superficial."

It may sound cliche, but true beauty really does comes from within. "Pretty privilege" has both its benefits and its pitfalls, but one of the life lessons that comes with age is that inner beauty only has upsides and gets better as you age. If you focus on enhancing your true self instead of being overly concerned about how you look, aging out of youthful beauty can be liberating and empowering.

Once a refugee seeking safety in the U.S., Anita Omary is using what she learned to help others thrive.
Pictured here: Anita Omary; her son, Osman; and Omary’s close friends
Pictured here: Anita Omary; her son, Osman; and Omary’s close friends
True

In March 2023, after months of preparation and paperwork, Anita Omary arrived in the United States from her native Afghanistan to build a better life. Once she arrived in Connecticut, however, the experience was anything but easy.

β€œWhen I first arrived, everything felt so strangeβ€”the weather, the environment, the people,” Omary recalled. Omary had not only left behind her extended family and friends in Afghanistan, she left her career managing child protective cases and supporting refugee communities behind as well. Even more challenging, Anita was five months pregnant at the time, and because her husband was unable to obtain a travel visa, she found herself having to navigate a new language, a different culture, and an unfamiliar country entirely on her own.


β€œI went through a period of deep disappointment and depression, where I wasn’t able to do much for myself,” Omary said.

Then something incredible happened: Omary met a woman who would become her close friend, offering support that would change her experience as a refugeeβ€”and ultimately the trajectory of her entire life.

Understanding the journey

Like Anita Omary, tens of thousands of people come to the United States each year seeking safety from war, political violence, religious persecution, and other threats. Yet escaping danger, unfortunately, is only the first challenge. Once here, immigrant and refugee families must deal with the loss of displacement, while at the same time facing language barriers, adapting to a new culture, and sometimes even facing social stigma and anti-immigrant biases.

Welcoming immigrant and refugee neighbors strengthens the nation and benefits everyoneβ€”and according to Anita Omary, small, simple acts of human kindness can make the greatest difference in helping them feel safe, valued, and truly at home.

A warm welcome

Dee and Omary's son, Osman

Anita Omary was receiving prenatal checkups at a woman’s health center in West Haven when she met Dee, a nurse.

β€œShe immediately recognized that I was new, and that I was struggling,” Omary said. β€œFrom that moment on, she became my support system.”

Dee started checking in on Omary throughout her pregnancy, both inside the clinic and out.

β€œShe would call me and ask am I okay, am I eating, am I healthy,” Omary said. β€œShe helped me with things I didn’t even realize I needed, like getting an air conditioner for my small, hot room.”

Soon, Dee was helping Omary apply for jobs and taking her on driving lessons every weekend. With her help, Omary landed a job, passed her road test on the first attempt, and even enrolled at the University of New Haven to pursue her master’s degree. Dee and Omary became like family. After Omary’s son, Osman, was born, Dee spent five days in the hospital at her side, bringing her halal food and brushing her hair in the same way Omary’s mother used to. When Omary’s postpartum pain became too great for her to lift Osman’s car seat, Dee accompanied her to his doctor’s appointments and carried the baby for her.

β€œHer support truly changed my life,” Omary said. β€œHer motivation, compassion, and support gave me hope. It gave me a sense of stability and confidence. I didn’t feel alone, because of her.”

More than that, the experience gave Omary a new resolve to help other people.

β€œThat experience has deeply shaped the way I give back,” she said. β€œI want to be that source of encouragement and support for others that my friend was for me.”

Extending the welcome

Omary and Dee at the Martin Luther King, Jr. Vision Awards ceremony at the University of New Haven.

Omary is now flourishing. She currently works as a career development specialist as she continues her Master’s degree. She also, as a member of the Refugee Storytellers Collective, helps advocate for refugee and immigrant families by connecting them with resourcesβ€”and teaches local communities how to best welcome newcomers.

β€œWelcoming new families today has many challenges,” Omary said. β€œOne major barrier is access to English classes. Many newcomers, especially those who have just arrived, often put their names on long wait lists and for months there are no available spots.” For women with children, the lack of available childcare makes attending English classes, or working outside the home, especially difficult.

Omary stresses that sometimes small, everyday acts of kindness can make the biggest difference to immigrant and refugee families.

β€œWelcome is not about big gestures, but about small, consistent acts of care that remind you that you belong,” Omary said. Receiving a compliment on her dress or her son from a stranger in the grocery store was incredibly uplifting during her early days as a newcomer, and Omary remembers how even the smallest gestures of kindness gave her hope that she could thrive and build a new life here.

β€œI built my new life, but I didn’t do it alone,” Omary said. β€œCommunity and kindness were my greatest strengths.”

Are you in? Click here to join the Refugee Advocacy Lab and sign the #WeWillWelcome pledge and complete one small act of welcome in your community. Together, with small, meaningful steps, we can build communities where everyone feels safe.

This article is part of Upworthy’s β€œThe Threads Between U.S.” series that highlights what we have in common thanks to the generous support from the Levi Strauss Foundation, whose grantmaking is committed to creating a culture of belonging.

quiet, finger over lips, don't talk, keep it to yourself, silence

A woman with her finger over her mouth.

It can be hard to stay quiet when you feel like you just have to speak your mind. But sometimes it's not a great idea to share your opinions on current events with your dad or tell your boss where they're wrong in a meeting. And having a bit of self-control during a fight with your spouse is a good way to avoid apologizing the next morning.

Further, when we fight the urge to talk when it's not necessary, we become better listeners and give others a moment in the spotlight to share their views. Building that small mental muscle to respond to events rather than react can make all the difference in social situations.


argument, coworkers, angry coworkers, hostile work enviornment, disagreement A woman is getting angry at her coworker.via Canva/Photos

What is the WAIT method?

One way people have honed the skill of holding back when they feel the burning urge to speak up is the WAIT method, an acronym for the question you should ask yourself in that moment: "Why Am I Talking?" Pausing to consider the question before you open your mouth can shift your focus from "being heard" to "adding value" to any conversation.

The Center for The Empowerment Dynamic has some questions we should consider after taking a WAIT moment:

  • What is my intention behind what I am about to say?
  • What question can I ask to better understand what the other person is saying?
  • Is my need to talk an attempt to divert the attention to me?
  • How might I become comfortable with silence rather than succumb to my urge to talk?

tape over muth, sielnce, be quiet, mouth shut, saying nothing A man with tape over his mouth.via Canva/Photos

The WAIT method is a good way to avoid talking too much. In work meetings, people who overtalk risk losing everyone's attention and diluting their point to the extent that others aren't quite sure what they were trying to say. Even worse, they can come across as attention hogs or know-it-alls. Often, the people who get to the heart of the matter succinctly are the ones who are noticed and respected.

Just because you're commanding the attention of the room doesn't mean you're doing yourself any favors or helping other people in the conversation.

The WAIT method is also a great way to give yourself a breather and let things sit for a moment during a heated, emotional discussion. It gives you a chance to cool down and rethink your goals for the conversation. It can also help you avoid saying something you regret.

fight, spuse disagreement, communications skills, upset husband, argument A husband is angry with his wife. via Canva/Photos

How much should I talk in a meeting?

So if it's a work situation, like a team meeting, you don't want to be completely silent. How often should you speak up?

Cary Pfeffer, a speaking coach and media trainer, shared an example of the appropriate amount of time to talk in a meeting with six people:

"I would suggest a good measure would be three contributions over an hour-long meeting from each non-leader participant. If anyone is talking five/six/seven times you are over-participating! Allow someone else to weigh in, even if that means an occasional awkward silence. Anything less seems like your voice is just not being represented, and anything over three contributions is too much."

Ultimately, the WAIT method is about taking a second to make sure you're not just talking to hear yourself speak. It helps ensure that you have a clear goal for participating in the conversation and that you're adding value for others. Knowing when and why to say something is the best way to make a positive contribution and avoid shooting yourself in the foot.

gramnesia, millennial, millennial parents, boomers, boomer parents, boomer grandparents, boomer grandparenting
@millennialmomtherapist/Instagram, Photo credit: Canva

Millennials coined the term "gramnesia" for Boomer grandparents who have forgotten what it's like raising kids.

Becoming a grandparent is the dream for many parents who've raised their children into adulthood. After all, there are few things sweeter than getting to spend time with grandkids.

But many Millennial parents have had many bones to pick with their Boomer parents about their grandparenting skills (or lack thereof). Recently, Millennials have been calling out Boomer grandparents for a number of questionable grandparenting behaviors: from excessive gift giving to completely disappearing.


And its led one Millennial mom to coin the term "gramnesia" when describing her Boomer parents as grandparents.

What is "gramnesia"?

β€œGramnesia,” which combines the words β€œgrandparent” and β€œamnesia,” has been popping up on Reddit discussions for a while now, though the coiner of the term seems unknown. But only recently has it been really gaining traction.

Back in June of 2024, Maryland-based therapist and mom Allie McQuaid, really brought β€œgramnesia” to the forefront of the conversation when she made an Instagram video all about it.

β€œI just heard this term called β€˜gramnesia’ when grandparents forget what it’s really like having young kids and I can’t stop thinking about how accurate it is,” she said in the clip.

In her caption, McQuaid shared how so many of her clients would get β€œslammed” by their parents about how different (i.e. β€œeasier”) raising kids was for them whenever they brought their own children around.

These hyperbolic memories are, as McQuaid put it, so β€œridiculous” that they've clearly β€œforgot[ten] what it was really like in those early years of parenthood.”

@selahvictor

Millennial Moms have you experienced this?! I swear every time I ask my Mom about a parenting struggle, she's like "what are you talking about?" SHE HAS GRAMNESIAπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚Disclaimer: my Mom had 8 kids, so maybe she just was way more of an expert than me😜Also if you made it to the end, this is probably why it was easier for that generation too (and why I'm a great sleeper!)πŸ˜‚ #boomers #millenialmom #millennial #boomermom #parentinghelp #momof8 #selahvictor #lamom #gramnesia

Examples of β€œgramnesia” statements

β€œYou never had tantrums when you were a kid.”

β€œI potty trained you before you were one.”

β€œYou were always happy to eat whatever we fed you.”

β€œYou were spanked and turned out fine!”

Clearly, McQuaid’s video struck a chord, because it wasn’t long before people begin chiming in with their own stories of gramnesia:

β€œMy MIL, over the years, loved to act like her children were perfect growing up. I love to tell the stories of her son (my hubby) getting into all kinds of trouble as a kid - oh the shock.”

β€œ*Baby makes any kind of noise* Grandma: "Oh they must be teething!" Me : "Umm she's 4 months old, She isn't teething yet - just has feelings and is you know - A BABY" grandma: β€˜well my kids had all their teeth by 4 months’ πŸ˜πŸ€¨β€

β€œ5 months old and not sleeping through the night? Did you try rice cereal? Baby not walking ? Rice cereal. Baby not in college yet? Have you tried rice cereal?”

β€œUgh my dad literally just said this to me last week… β€˜I don’t remember you guys having this many tantrums’… πŸ™„ right after my boys were upset.”

gramnesia, boomer grandparent, boomer grandparents, grandkids, grandparenting Some Boomer grandparents are being called out for "gramnesia".Photo credit: Canva

Why "gramnesia" exists in the first place

One is that it could simply be the natural tendency to have a cognitive bias which puts past experiences in a more positive light than they actually were, aka having β€œeuphoric recall.” As she told Huffpost, we tend to have a β€œfoggier memory of how things truly were” as we get older, β€œespecially if the experience we had was particularly difficult or even traumatic.”

Plus, the first few years of parenthood are often such a blur anyway. McQuaid herself admitted that ”I even have a hard time remembering the first year of motherhood, and that was only four years ago.”

In addition, McQuaid theorized that gramnesia exists because previous generations β€œwere not given space to express emotions or indicate that they were struggling to adjust to motherhood.” Honestly, a sound hypothesis.

How to confront Boomer parents about "gramnesia"

β€œCheck your capacity if you have the space or energy to even consider bringing up your frustration with your parents,” she told Huffpost. β€œYou are likely in the throes of parenting right now, and maybe all you can do is smile and nod after hearing for the 100th time how β€˜you were never like this.’”

However, if you are determined to bring it up and set the record straight, McQuaid suggests to actually keep it centered around you and how the situation makes you feel, rather than combating their memories. So, instead of saying, β€œThat’s NOT how it happened!” try something like, β€œWhen you said that I never did X when I was Y’s age, it makes me question how well I’m doing as a parent.” Probably easier said than done, to be sure.

And while this sore spot might never come to a full resolution for a lot of millennial parents, at least take some solace in knowing that you’re not crazy, nor are you alone.

This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.

Pop Culture

James Van Der Beek's realization about his identity after cancer has people pondering

"I had to look my own mortality in the eye," said the Dawson's Creek alum. "I had to come nose to nose with death."

james van der beek
Photo credits: SANSIERRASTUDIO (left) Super Festivals from Ft. Lauderdale, USA (right)

James Van Der Beek in 2010 and 2023

There's nothing like a brush with death to make you reflect on your life. It's so easy for all of us to get caught up in the day-to-day details of living and not take the time to ponder the deeper elements of existence, from the nature of the universe to the meaning of life to our own individual role in the big picture.

Existential questions can sometimes feel overwhelming, but actor James Van Der Beek shared a thoughtful 48th birthday message with his own life reflection after facing cancer, and it distills a lot of the angst of those questions into a simple yet profound answer that's hitting home with people.


Van Der Beek, who starred in the millennial favorite Dawson's Creek, announced he'd been diagnosed with stage 3 colorectal cancer in 2024 at age 47. He and his wife, Kimberly, have six children, and in a video shared on social media, Van Der Beek shared the progression from his somewhat unfulfilling identity as an actor to "the ultimate" identity as a husband and father prior to his cancer diagnosis.

"I could define myself as a loving, capable, strong, supportive husband, father, provider, steward of the land that we're so lucky to live on," he said. "And for a long time, that felt like a really good definition of the question, 'Who am I? What am I?'"

"And then this year, I had to look my own mortality in the eye," he continued. "I had to come nose to nose with death. And all of those definitions that I cared so deeply about were stripped from me. I was away for treatment, so I could no longer be a husband who is helpful to my wife. I could no longer be a father who could pick up his kids and put them to bed and be there for them. I could not be a provider because I wasn't working. I couldn't even be a steward of the land because at times I was too weak to prune all the trees during the window that you're supposed to prune them."

He found himself facing the question: "If I am just a too-skinny, weak guy, alone in an apartment, with cancer, what am I?"

So often we define ourselves by our roles in life or by what we do, but what if those things change? Who are we when it's just us, alone, with nothing external to anchor us to a particular identity?

"And I meditated and the answer came through," Van Der Beek shared. "I am worthy of God's love, simply because I exist. And if I'm worthy of God's love, shouldn't I also be worthy of my own? And the same is true for you."

I offer that to you however it sits in your consciousness. However it resonates, run with it," he said. "And if the word God trips you up, I certainly don't know or claim to know what God is or explain God. My efforts to connect to God are an ongoing process that is a constant unfolding mystery to me. But if it's a trigger or if it feels too religious you can take the word 'God' out and your mantra can simply be 'I am worthy of love.' Because you are."


Van Der Beek's sincere, warm delivery and universal message of love and worth hit home for a lot of people. Fellow celebrities and fans alike praised and thanked him for it:

"Happy birthday brother. This was absolutely beautiful πŸ’œπŸ™πŸ»πŸ’œ," wrote singer Chris Daughtry.

"You’re a gift to this earth and I’m grateful to know you even if it’s just through IG. Greatly admire the graceful way you share and happy you made it around the Sun again," wrote New Kids on the Block's Joey McIntyre.

The Sopranos' Jamie-Lynn Sigler wrote, "That is it James. That is it. And you my friend are love. A steward of love. A teacher of love !❀️. We love you !!"

"I watched this with Bodhi with tears in our eyes and Bodhi said 'that was really touching' thanks for being love James and sharing that with everyone, ❀️" added actor Teresa Palmer.

Battlestar Galactica reboot's Katee Sackhoff wrote, "Thank you for your vulnerability and wisdom ❀️ Amen!'

"You are such a special soul. You are pure love my friend," added actor Nikki Reed. "Worthy of it all… hoping to hug all of you soon. Happy birthday❀️❀️❀️"

Some people took issue with Van Der Beek saying people could remove the word "God" from the message if they wanted to, but the reality is that not everyone has positive feelings about God or religion, and some have even been deeply hurt by people weaponizing them. Van Der Beek making a message of love more universal so that everyone can take it in and benefit from it without barriers or hang-ups is part of what makes it so beautiful. He was able to express his own religious/spiritual experience without shying away from the terminology that was true for him, while also making sure that his message was accessible to everyone regardless of faith or belief.

Perhaps we can all take a lesson from Van Der Beek's sincere, open, and balanced approach as well.

1990s kids, 1990s parents, lies, '90s nostalgia, old wives tale, '90s kid
via 90sKid4lyfe/TikTok (used with permission)

90sKidforLife shares 10 lies everyone's parents told in the era.

Children believe everything their parents tell them. So, when parents lie to prevent their kids to stop them from doing something dumb, the untruth can take on a life of its own. The lie can get passed on from generation to generation until it becomes a zombie lie that has a life of its own. In 2024, a man named Justin, known as 90sKid4Lyfe on TikTok and Instagram, put together a list of 10 lies parents told their kids in the β€˜90s, and the Gen X kids in the comments thought it was spot on.

β€œWhy was I told EVERY ONE of these?” one commenter, wrote. β€œI heard all of these plus the classic β€˜If you keep making that face, it will get stuck like that,’” another added. After just four days of being posted, the video had been viewed upwards of 250,000 times.


@90skid4lyfe

Parents were always lying #90s #90skids #parenting

Here are Justin’s 10 lies '90s parents told their kids:

1. "You can't drink coffee. It'll stunt your growth."

2. "If you pee in the pool, it's gonna turn blue."

3. "Chocolate milk comes from brown cows."

4. "If you eat those watermelon seeds, you'll grow a watermelon in your stomach."

5. "Don't swallow that gum. If you do, it'll take 7 years to come out."

6. "I told you we can't drive with the interior light on. ... It's illegal."

7. "Sitting that close to the TV is going to ruin your vision."

8. "If you keep cracking your knuckles, you're gonna get arthritis."

8. "You just ate, you gotta wait 30 minutes before you can swim."

10. "If you get a tattoo, you won't find a job."

'90s kids, '80s kids, parents, white lies, tattoo, jobs A woman gets a tattoo.Canva Photos

Eight more lies that parents told their kids in the '90s

Justin's video was also a hit on Reddit, where many commenters had heard the same lies growing up. However, there were a few more they remembered hearing as kids back in the day. Commenters added eight more items to his list of 10 things that parents lied to their kids about in the '90s. Here are some great ones Justin could use to create a follow-up video:

"When the ice cream man is playing music, that means he’s all sold out."

"You'll never make any money messing around with that computer."

'90s kids, '80s kids, parents, white lies, kids, parenting Boy playing on the computer.Canva Photos

"Dusty went to live on a farm."

"You'll go to jail if you take the mattress tag off."

"My in-laws told my husband (as a child) not to flip the light switch on and off because he would start a fire in the wall that would burn down the house."

"I was also always told that if I played with the campfire, I would wet the bed that night."

"Green potato chips are poisonous, and eating raw hot dogs gives you cancer."

"My mom told me I couldn’t put on the skin transfer tattoo that came with my chewing gum because the tattoo had drugs in it."

This post originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

boomers, old people complaints, technology, gen x, millennials, gen z, grumpy old man, old people, seniors
via Tim Doefler/Unsplash

Boomers weren't wrong about everything. Here are 16 complaints even young people agree with.

Baby boomers often find themselves the butt of the joke these days. Deserved or not, they have to absorb some serious criticism from Gen Xers down to Gen Alpha kids. Notoriously, the generation takes heat from younger generations who think that their me-first mentality helped create a world where the climate is getting warmer, the rich are getting richer, the poor are getting poorer and people born in the β€˜40s and β€˜50s still rule the modern workplace. They're also famous for being crotchety, cranky, and pessimistic about the way the world is going.

And in that, they're not always wrong. Many boomers would probably stand up and cheer if they read a list of tweets inspired by a since-deleted discussion on X that posted the question, β€œWhat is the most boomer complaint you have?”


The debate was embraced by younger people and received over 123 million views and spawned similar discourses all across social media.

boomers, old people complaints, technology, gen x, millennials, gen z, grumpy old man, old people, seniors Grumpy boomers aren't wrong about everything. Photo by Evgeniy Kozlov on Unsplash

Even though boomers are frequently in the hot seat these days, just about everyone can agree that they’re right about many things that get under younger people’s skin, too. One of the recurring themes of the post was that people can’t stand the fact that we are overly dependent on technology, and often, instead of making things more accessible, it makes them more frustrating.

Here are 16 of the best β€˜boomer complaints’ that younger people have, too.

People had a lot of thoughts on the state of tipping culture.

"Tipping culture has gotten out of hand," one user wrote.

The discussion and sentiment continued over on Reddit, where one user joked: "Do you want to tip 20% for this comment?"


- YouTube www.youtube.com

They also can’t stand the idea that technology has complicated things unnecessarily.

One Redditor wrote simply, "I miss buttons."

"And cords. Can’t I just connect things like the old days??" someone added.

Another observed how annoying it is to "sign up" for every single thing. "Don’t make me have an account for everything."

"This more broadly is turning into one of my largest complaints about living ... Too many apps, too many accounts, too many ads, too many notifications, too many questions, too many email lists," someone responded.


And don't even get them started on AI.

"I. WANT. TO. TALK. TO. AN. AGENT!!!!!! DON’T. WANT. YOUR. [&$^@&*#]. AI. CUSTOMER. SUPPORT!!!!!!!" a Redditor fumed.

Some were frustrated enough to find ways to hack the system. "My hack that I find works on the majority of these systems is to mumble nonsense when asked 'what can i help you with today?', the system usually asks to clarify a couple of times and then will get you an agent as it cannot understand your request."

Alsoβ€”what happened to adult clothes?

"Adults shouldn't dress like children. Jordans, Yeezys, 'slides', etc." someone added.


Whatever happened to paying for something once and then owning it?

Or being able to own physical media so that you don’t have to pay every time you watch your favorite movie?

"I wanna go back to blue-rays and DVDs and actually own the content I like. Fk streaming, yes to physical media!"

"Why does everything good require a subscription"

"I am absolutely not paying a monthly subscription to use your shitty app," a Reddit user wrote.


Moving on to food complaints.

When did we all decide that almost every chip has to be kettle-cooked and made for people with cobalt teeth? Enjoying a snack shouldn't result in a $5,000 dental bill.

"potato chips are too expensive and too hard these days" wrote someone on X.

Oh, and the new high-tech food menus drive everyone nuts, too:

"Please don't make me scan a QR code for the menu," a Reddit user added.

"I don't want to use a QR code to see a menu or store hours, give me a paper menu," an X user agreed.

boomers, old people complaints, technology, gen x, millennials, gen z, grumpy old man, old people, seniors Even the young people can't stand QR codes. Photo by Albert Hu on Unsplash


Remember when coffee was a quarter? Boomers do.

These days, it's common to spend $6 or $7 PLUS on a cup of Joe.

"I remember when coffee wasn’t the cost of a meal," an X user reminisced.

And it's not just coffee. Even the price of a McDonald's cheeseburger has nearly doubled in the last ten years. We're all cranky about it.


boomers, old people complaints, technology, gen x, millennials, gen z, grumpy old man, old people, seniors Everything, even fast food, has gotten out of control expensive. Photo by Hexandcube on Unsplash

We might label boomers as the cranky generation, but eventually, Gen Xers, millennials and, yes, even Gen Zers will be right behind them, complaining about "kids these days" and why things were so much better "in my day." Tis the circle of life. One the bright side though, they'll at least be better at using technology.

This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.