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Modern Families

Exhausted mom posted a letter begging her husband for help. And then it went viral.

An open letter by Celeste Yvonne shows overwhelmed mothers how to ask for support.

viral, parenting, motherhood, communication, relationships, blogger
Photo via Celeste Yvonne, used with permission.

Celeste Yvonne wrote a letter to her husband asking for help.

Taking care of a newborn baby is mentally, physically, and spiritually exhausting. For the first four months (at least!), new parents have to dedicate every part of themselves to caring for this young life.

There's little time for self-care during this chaotic period, let alone a moment to be fully present with a partner.

A blogger who goes by the name Celeste Yvonne was the mother of a toddler and a newborn and wrote a revealing open letter to her husband asking for more help with their children.

It went viral in 2018 because it paints a very real picture of what it feels like to be a mother who feels stuck doing everything. And the message still resonated deeply today.

It's also important because it gives specific ways for parents to support each other.

Dear Husband,

I. Need. More. Help.

Last night was hard for you. I asked you to watch the baby so I could go to bed early. The baby was crying. Wailing, really. I could hear him from upstairs and my stomach knotted from the sound, wondering if I should come down there and relieve you or just shut the door so I could get some desperately needed sleep. I chose the latter.

You came into the room 20 minutes later, with the baby still frantically crying. You placed the baby in the bassinet and gently pushed the bassinet just a few inches closer to my side of the bed, a clear gesture that you were done watching him.

I wanted to scream at you. I wanted to launch an epic fight that very moment. I had been watching the baby and the toddler all damn day. I was going to be waking up with the baby to feed him all damn night. The least you could do is hold him for a couple of hours in the evening to I can attempt to sleep.

Just a few hours of precious sleep. Is that too much to ask?

I know we both watched our parents fulfill the typical mother-father roles growing up. Both our mothers were the primary caretakers and our fathers were relatively hands off. They were excellent dads, but they weren't expected to spend a significant amount of time changing diapers, feeding, caring, and tending to the kids. Our mothers were the superwomen who maintained the family dynamics. Cooking, cleaning, and raising the children. Any help from dad was welcome, but unexpected.

I see us falling into these family dynamics more and more each day. My responsibility to feed the family, keep the house clean, and take care of the kids is assumed, even as I return to work. I blame myself for most of it too. I have set the precedent that I can do it. And in truth I want to. No offense, but I'm not sure I want to know what a week's worth of dinner would look like with you in charge.

I also see my friends and other moms doing it all, and doing it well. I know you see it, too. If they can manage it, and if our mothers did it so well for us, why can't I?

I don't know.

Maybe our friends are playing the part in public and secretly struggling. Maybe our moms suffered in silence for years and now, thirty years later, they simply don't remember how hard it really was. Or maybe, and this is something I berate myself over every single day, I'm just not as qualified for the job as everyone else. And as much as I cringe just thinking it, I'm going to say it: I need more help.

Part of me feels like a failure for even asking. I mean, you do help. You are an amazing father, and you do a great job with the kids. And besides, this should come easy to me, right? Motherly instincts, no?

But I'm human, and I'm running on five hours of sleep and tired as hell. I need you.

In the morning, I need you to get our toddler ready so I can care for the baby and make everyone's lunches and drink a cup of coffee. And no, getting the toddler ready does not mean plopping him in front of the TV. It means making sure he went potty, giving him some breakfast, seeing if he wants water, and packing his bag for school.

At night, I need an hour to decompress in bed knowing our toddler is asleep in his room and the baby is in your care. I know it's hard to listen to the baby cry. Believe me, I know. But if I can watch and pacify the baby for the majority of the day, you can do it for an hour or two at night. Please. I need you.

On weekends, I need more breaks. Times where I can get out of the house by myself and feel like an individual. Even if it's just a walk around the block or a trip to the grocery store. And some days when I've scheduled swim class and play dates, and it seems like I've got it all under control, I need you to offer to lend me a hand. Or suggest I go lay down during the kids' naptime. Or start putting away the dishes without me suggesting it. I need you.

Lastly, I need to hear you're grateful for all I do. I want to know that you notice the laundry is done and a nice dinner has been prepared. I want to know you appreciate that I breastfeed at all hours and pump when I'm at work when it would be easier for me to formula feed. I hope you notice that I never ask you to stay home from your networking events and sport activities. As the mom, it's assumed I'll be home all the time and always available to care for the kids while you're out and I feed that assumption by, well, being home all the time.

I know it's not how our parents did it, and I hate even asking. I wish I could do it all and make it look effortless. And I wish I didn't need kudos for doing things most people expect from a mom. But I'm waving a white flag and admitting I'm only human. I'm telling you how much I need you, and if I keep going at the pace I've been on, I will break. And that would hurt you, the kids, and our family.

Because, let's face it: you need me, too."

After the video went viral, Yvonne filmed another thanking everyone who read it and addressed the biggest question it raised: Did the letter work?

"Yes, absolutely. Communication works — most of the time," Yvonne said with a laugh. "I told [my husband] all the stuff I'm doing on the back end that he had no idea about. And then he told me all the concerns and the stress he's been having as a new father. Things that I had no idea about. It was so eye-opening, and I'm so grateful for it.”

Watch the YouTube video below:

This article originally appeared on 3.20.18

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Joy

5 small things that made us smile this week

We're giving you the small things that make us smile, every single week

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Hey, have you heard? Life is kind of stressful. Between a news cycle that just won’t quit and the never-ending temptation to doom-scroll, finding small moments of joy throughout the day has become more important than ever.

Case in point: A dog wearing sunglasses.

A news headline that makes you want to high-five a million angels.

A sweet snack that boosts your dopamine, courtesy of our friends at All In.

Or a tweet so perfectly timed it restores your faith in the algorithm (even if only for a second).



These momentary mood boosters are everywhere you look—you just have to be able to find them underneath all the noise. And that’s where we come in.

Consider this weekly web series your cheat sheet to the best of the Internet—not just random memes to make you laugh, but examples of people truly finding something extraordinary in the mundane. We'll be delivering five pieces of media that allow you to stop for a second, take a breath, and feel just a little bit brighter among the daily stress. (Think of us as your chronically online bestie who knows exactly how to make you smile, exactly when you need it the most.)

Ready to laugh? Have your heart melted? Cry happy tears? Let's get into it.

1. Petunia the pig

@knightk64 #petuniathepig#fyp#babypig#alltheprettygirls#animallove ♬ original sound - petuniathepig1

With over nine million views on a single video alone, you know there’s got to be something special about Petunia the Pig. And there is. Behold: the tiniest, most adorable pig we’ve ever laid eyes on. Abandoned by her pig mother, Petunia is a spotted teacup pig who was taken in by TikTok user @knightk64, and we’re all the better for it. She snorts (squeaks) constantly. She tippy-taps across the floor. She takes long naps nestled in her favorite blanket. And she now even has an adopted teacup pig sister named Rosie. Not to be dramatic, but we’d die for this pig.

2. Pop Muzik dances 

@ptpowers Everyone’s #foryoupage the @project21 dance or just us? #dad #baby #dance #fyp #trending ♬ Pop Muzik - M & Robin Scott

Remember when TikTok used to be a dancing app? The dance trends are making a comeback now in the best way—and this new trend is the most fun we’ve seen people having on this app in a while.

The trend started when a mega-talented group of girls from the Project 21 dance studio performed at the NYCDA 2025 dance competition in Las Vegas back in early April. Not only did the girls nab some of the highest awards at the competition, their recorded performance quickly went viral. The song choice? The 1979 classic “Pop Muzik.” The dance? Impossible to look away from. (Here’s a short clip of the girls in all their glory.)

While the original dance is just so fun to watch, what might be even more fun is seeing all the copycat performances and tutorials that have been launched across TikTok ever since. If this doesn’t make you want to get up and dance, nothing will.

3. Seeking out the extra in the ordinary 

There are so many beautiful moments each day that are worth noticing, and the folks at All In are out to help us recognize them. Each week, the All In crew takes to the streets to find the "extra" in the ordinary—small moments of joy that make a typical day just a little bit brighter. Today's moment of joy? Finding community and feeling like you're part of something really special. Can't get much better than that.

4. This tweet series about COVID lockdowns 

Back in 2023, a study in the British Medical Journal made headlines when it claimed that the COVID lockdowns of 2020 only “minimally” affected people’s mental health. As you can probably guess, when news of the study hit Twitter, people were not having it.

Cue one of the funniest and most eye-opening discussions of mental health we’ve possibly ever had as a society. Thousands of people took to the Internet to quote-tweet the article, sharing the most unhinged things they did while stuck in the confines of their house or bedroom, such as: Learning how to play a recorder with one nostril. Watching Glee 26 times in a row. Throwing a birthday party for the dishwasher. The list goes on.

As the fifth year anniversary of COVID lockdowns just passed, these tweets are circulating again. They’re funny, they’re raw, and they shine a spotlight on the effects of isolation on mental health in a way that’s never been done before. Here’s part one of a series, and here are some more. Enjoy!

5. Thirst edits featuring regular people

@coreymbrandon thank you 🥹 @Chili’s Grill & Bar #chilis #CapCut ♬ som original - helo

Here’s where the writer of this article shows her age and admits that, before this trend, she had no idea what a thirst edit was. Allow us to break it down for you: According to ChatGPT, a thirst edit is a video (or series of short videos), usually with specific music or text overlays, created to be seductive and attention grabbing. (Kinda like this, only set to music.)

This new trend takes a normal thirst edit and flips it on its head. Instead of trying to seduce the audience, people are now using thirst traps to romanticize daily life—stuff like eating mozzarella sticks at Chili’s, or hanging out by the pool—or to cheekily boost their own confidence. Set to the song “My Bubble Gum” by Rasheeda, this trend is just normal, everyday people absolutely feeling themselves and celebrating ordinary life. We love to see it.


For even more “extra”-ordinary moments, come find us on social media (@upworthy) or on upworthy.com!

For scrumptious snacks that add an extra boost of joy to your day, be sure to check out All In.

Wellness

We asked people what they enjoy that others don't understand. One answer ruled them all.

Surprisingly, research shows that these people are less likely to be neurotic.

Photo credit: Canva

Some people genuinely enjoy spending lots of time alone.

Some people have quirky hobbies and interests that other might find odd, so when we asked our Upworthy audience on Facebook, "What's something that you really enjoy that other people can't seem to understand?" and over 1,700 people weighed in, it wasn't too surprising. Some people shared things like housework, cleaning and laundry, which a lot of people see as chores. Others shared different puzzles or forms of art they like doing, and still others shared things like long car rides or grocery shopping.

But what was surprising was the one answer that dominated the list of responses. It came in various wordings, but by far the most common answer to the question was "silent solitude."

alone time, solitude, being alone, home aloneSweet solitude is heavenly for some people.Photo credit: Canva

Here are a few examples:

"Feeling perfectly content, when I’m all alone."

"Being home. Alone. In silence."

"That I enjoy being alone and my soul is at peace in the silence. I don't need to be around others to feel content, and it takes me days to recharge from being overstimulated after having an eventful day surrounded by others."

"Enjoying your own company. Being alone isn’t isolating oneself. It’s intentional peace and healthy… especially for deep feelers/thinkers."

Spending time by ourselves is something some of us relish, while some of us hate being alone. Naturally, this points to the common theory of introversion vs. extraversion, but in some ways, that's overly simplistic. Even the most peopley people among us can enjoy some quality alone time, and not all introverts see time alone as truly enjoyable. (It might be necessary for an introvert's well-being, but not necessarily something they truly revel in.)

sitting alone, solitude, contemplation, being by yourselfBeing alone doesn't automatically mean being lonely.Photo credit: Canva

Interestingly, studies have found that people who enjoy being alone are not any more or less extraverted than those who don't, though they do tend to be less "sociable." They are also less likely to be neurotic (tense, moody, worrying types) than the generally population and more likely to be open-minded. Those characteristics are the opposite of what social norms often tell us about people who want to be alone.

"If our stereotypes about people who like being alone were true, then we should find that they are neurotic and closed-minded. In fact, just the opposite is true," writes Bella DePaulo, PhD.

being alone, reading, drinking tea, solitudeIt's healthy to be comfortable being alone with yourself.Photo credit: Canva

There may be lots of reasons some people like to spend time by themselves while others don't. We are naturally social creatures and need social interaction, but some of us find ourselves overstimulated by being around other people all the time. On the flip side, some people find being alone not just unenjoyable, but extremely uncomfortable, which can be a problem.

"Ideally, we should be comfortable with ourselves, alone or with others," writes psychologist Tara Well Ph.D.. "If you are uncomfortable being alone, it means you are uncomfortable being with yourself without distraction, engagement, or affirmation from others. This can be a liability in life. If you cannot be alone, you may stay in situations or make life choices that aren’t good for you in the long run, like staying in a job or a relationship, mainly because you can’t tolerate being alone while transitioning to a better situation."

woman dancing alone, enjoying alone timeEnjoying your own company is a gift.Photo credit: Canva

Dr. Well also points out that people can make the most of their alone time, even if it's not something they naturally enjoy. One way is to make it purposeful, setting aside a little time daily to write in a journal, meditate, go for a walk or otherwise engage your mind and body in some form of reflection. Another is to pay attention to self-judgments that might make alone time uncomfortable and challenge them with some compassionate confrontation and counteraction with positive thoughts about yourself.

Alone time can be refreshing and rewarding, especially if it's something you naturally crave. Some people even like to take themselves out on dates or enjoy traveling by themselves. That kind of self-care can be just as important as connecting with others for our overall health and well-being. Being alone doesn't mean being a loner and it doesn't mean being lonely. Some of us genuinely like having quality time with ourselves, whether it makes sense to other people or not.

This article originally appeared last year.

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Art

Pianist stuns by using every part of his piano to perform 'Africa' by Toto

"I don't think I've ever seen anyone has so much fun playing the piano."

via Peter Benace/YouTube

Peter Bence plays the entire piano, and he does it barefoot.

Peter Bence’s performance of “Africa” by Toto has over 19 million views on YouTube because of his creative reimagining of the song and, well, just about everyone loves “Africa.” Bence is a Hungarian composer and producer who has become a viral sensation for his Michael Jackson, Queen, Sia, and Beatles covers. He has over 1.1 million followers on YouTube and has toured the globe, playing in more than 40 countries across four continents.

His performance of “Africa'' is unique because it opens with him creating a rhythm track and looping it by strategically tapping the piano and rubbing its strings to create the sound of shakers and conga drums.

The video eventually becomes rapturous, with Bence making the piano sound like an entire orchestra.

- YouTubeyoutu.be

As the video caption says, "Toto x Peter Bence = Africa Piano Symphony." Indeed. People were blown away by Bence's impressive rendition of the classic 80s song.

"I’m so glad to watch and see a fellow musician, that enjoys the music deep down. Excellent playing man!"

"So fluid. The piano is an extension of your whole body. Amazing."

"I don't think I've ever seen anyone has so much fun playing the piano. You're not just terrifically talented, I love the creativity."

"Brilliant! Loved it. It made me think what would J S Bach have done with looping on a piano/harpsichord?"

bach, piano, harpsichord, musicWhat if Bach had had looping technology?Giphy GIF by marko

"Mesmerizing! He became the music and the music became him."

"Are you kidding me!!!! This cover is incredible. Still listening to it, years after I discovered it."

"I return to this regularly, it's absolute witchcraft levels of genius. This level of talent isn't written in any handbook, it's completely unworldly."

"I love how PB plays a piano worth more than my house in his bare feet like it's an actual extension of his body. Pure brilliance."

baby at piano, toddler piano, piano prodigyPeter Bence was considered a musical prodigy as a child.Photo credit: Canva

If it seems like Bence was born to do this, that appears to be accurate. According to the bio on his website:

"Starting as early as age 2 he already played back melodies by ear from his favorite cartoons and films on his grandparents’ upright piano. Showing serious interest and talent, he soon began his musical education at 4 in the local music school of his hometown, Hajduboszormeny in Hungary.

He was considered a musical prodigy by teachers and peers, and was already accepted at Franz Liszt University of Music in Debrecen, despite he was still being enrolled at elementary school.

At 7 he wrote his first composition, which was heavily influenced by the music of Mozart and Chopin, and at 11 he published his first solo piano album of his early compositions."

So yeah. The guy has had piano chops since toddlerhood, and he's made the instrument his own with unique, edgy pieces like this one.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Released in 1982, “Africa” was Toto’s biggest hit, reaching number one 1 in the U.S., number 3 in the UK, and the top 10 globally. It’s a stirring piece of music that’s beautifully arranged with an anthemic chorus. However, the lyrics aren’t that accurate.

The song’s author, Toto keyboardist Jeff Pocaro, describes it as: “A white boy is trying to write a song on Africa, but since he's never been there, he can only tell what he's seen on TV or remembers in the past.”

Nevertheless, the song is an iconic tune that captures a specific spirit of the early ‘80s when the world turned its focus to Africa. Over 40 years later, the song’s wholesome sincerity has made it a piece of music that every few years captures the hearts of a new generation.

This article originally appeared two years ago.

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Pop Culture

Real women trying on 'micro shorts' is the comedy gold we didn't know we needed

Proof we don't need to force ourselves to fit into trends…unless we're needing a good laugh.

Prisma Photo via Canva/Bianca Marie Arreola via Canva

Women are trying Free People's 'micro shorts' with hilarious commentary

With every season, comes a new trendy fashion item that retailers push as the must-have piece. But as we know, no trend is universally flattering.

Case and point, last year, when Free People, a specialty lifestyle brand for bohemian styled fashion, released its "micro shorts," which, as you can probably guess, are teeny tiny. They might check off all the requirements for a pair of shorts...except, they appear to be about the length of underwear.

If you're thinking "there's no way those would look good," you're not wrong! And to prove that point, a couple of women bought some to try on so you don't have to. The videos are not only honest but hilarious.

In one video Nicole Walters, a New York Times best selling author and mom to three girls, decided to order the shorts to see how they looked on someone with, "thigh meat." She wears a size 12 and often jokes about being a curvier on the bottom. When she pulled the shorts out, it looked as if she was going to have to perform a magic trick to get them on. They looked to be the size a small child would wear, but they seemed to have gone on easily even though they looked extremely uncomfortable. She looked uncomfortable. The viewers likely looked uncomfortable.

"Oh wow. They're in there and by in there I mean everywhere. There's a lot of thigh meat happening right now in the, this region," Walters says as she gestures at her upper thighs. "There's some thigh meat, um...uh...I feel like they're definitely in some places that I didn't know I had."

Walter's review of the shorts has people in stitches as she jokes about her Christianity falling out of the shorts.

"It’s the Barbie walk for me lol!!! Thank you for your service," one person says.

"The way you warn us that you’re going to turn around almost made me scream with laughter," someone writes.

"I'm just going to go ahead and dial 911 for help bc looks like you may need the jaws of life to come out them shorts...lol!! Your commentary had me dying laughing..lol," another commenter jokes.

In another Free People "micro shorts" try on video, Nicole Story Dent braved the itty bitty shorts to show her audience the summer trend they can look forward to seeing. The first pair of shorts has multiple flaps that appear to be large pockets which inspires Dent to pretend to fly in them before the discomfort sinks in.

"It's kinda giving waitress...if they ever want to make a Waffle House-Hooters hybrid, we have their uniform, "she said. "We have been asking for more pockets so they delivered. Speaking of delivered, you could deliver a baby without having to take these shorts off."

Dent guessed that the shorts would be more like "jundies" or "janties" than jorts, the shorthand term for jean shorts. Commenters couldn't stop laughing at her description of the shorts while others provided her with words of wisdom.

"Do NOT drop it low in these jundies, that kind of contact with the club floor is NOT hygienic," someone wrote.

"'There is nothing vegan about these. There is absolutely a cat being harmed!' I’m cackling! You really should win something from Free People for this! @freepeople we found your next model," another person joked.

"This is the kind of content the internet was made for, it’s just so good. However my thighs started getting chafed just watching this," added a third.

If you're brave enough to give these micro shorts a try, go ahead and stock up on some baby powder for all the chaffing. However, it's all about long Bermuda shorts this year. And since no one can keep up with fashion's rapid pace anyway, why not just stick with what feels good?

This article originally appeared last year.

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Music

In 2022, John Lennon's son performed 'Imagine' for the first time after swearing he never would

"Within this song, we’re transported to a space, where love and togetherness become our reality, if but for a moment in time."

via Julian Lennon/YouTube and Wikimedia Commons

John and Julian Lennon both performing "Imagine."

In 1971, a year after the break-up of the Beatles, John Lennon released his most important piece of music, his single “Imagine.” The song is an appeal to humanity’s goodness and urges the listener to "join us" in visualizing a world without war, hunger, or greed.

The song provides a glimmer of hope in that if we can visualize a perfect world, then maybe one day it will be achievable. Over the past 50 years, the song has become a secular hymn that can conjure hope in the aftermath of the most tragic events. The song was played by Queen at Wembley Arena after Lennon was murdered in 1980. Steve Wonder sang it at the closing ceremonies of the 1996 Olympics to honor the lives of those lost at the Centennial Olympic Park bombing. Neil Young played it at the 9/11 Tribute to Heroes concert. And who could forget the infamous celebrity singalong to "Imagine" in 2020 barely a week into the initial COVID pandemic shutdown?

“Imagine” is widely seen as Lennon’s signature song that encapsulates his artistic persona, which is no small feat given the earth-shattering effect the songs he wrote with the Beatles have had on the world.

John Lennon, Beatles, musician, Imagine, magnum opusimagine the beatles GIFGiphy

Given the song’s incredible power, Lennon’s son Julian vowed never to perform it in public. Julian has had success as a musician over the years, most notably with his 1984 hit, “Too Late for Goodbyes.” He’s also a philanthropist who has produced numerous documentaries.

The war in Ukraine pushed Julian to break his vow and he performed a beautiful rendition of “Imagine” as part of Global Citizen’s social media rally, “Stand Up For Ukraine” on April 8, 2022. The campaign worked to raise money for the war-torn country, a cause Julian still adamantly supports three years into the conflict.

During the 2022 performance, Julian was accompanied by guitarist Nuno Bettencourt, who is best known as the lead guitarist of the Boston rock band Extreme and a member of Rihanna's touring band.

"The War on Ukraine is an unimaginable tragedy... As a human, and as an artist, I felt compelled to respond in the most significant way I could," Lennon wrote in the video's description in 2022. "So today, for the first time ever, I publicly performed my Dad’s song, IMAGINE. Why now, after all these years? — I had always said, that the only time I would ever consider singing ‘IMAGINE’ would be if it was the ‘End of the World’…But also because his lyrics reflect our collective desire for peace worldwide."

Watch:

- YouTubeyoutu.be

Lennon went on to say he was influenced to sing the iconic song "because within this song, we’re transported to a space, where love and togetherness become our reality, if but for a moment in time… The song reflects the light at the end of the tunnel, that we are all hoping for…

“As a result of the ongoing murderous violence, millions of innocent families, have been forced to leave the comfort of their homes, to seek asylum elsewhere,” Lennon concluded his message. “I’m calling on world leaders and everyone who believes in the sentiment of IMAGINE, to stand up for refugees everywhere! Please advocate and donate from the heart. #StandUpForUkraine.”

John Lennon, Imagine, song, piano, musicianJohn Lennon recording at the piano. via Wikimedia Commons

Lennon’s decision to never play “Imagine” was a wonderful way to honor his father’s legacy by respecting the power of his song, but John would probably be proud if he knew that he sang it at a time when we all need to imagine “all the people living life in peace.”

Julian Lennon continues to advocate for those suffering in the world by raising awareness and offering help through his charity, The White Feather Foundation, which was established in 2007 and exists "for the Conservation of Life" and provides aid for the environment, the preservation of Indigenous cultures, and access to clean water, education, and health.

In 2023, The White Feather Foundation launched an emergency campaign alongside World Central Kitchen to feed those in need in response to the Israel-Hamas conflict. And earlier this year, Lennon and The White Feather Foundation donated a split $10,000 to MusiCares and FireAid in response to the Los Angeles wildfires in January.

Clearly in all that Lennon does to help the world and others, whether through his philanthropy or his music, he's supporting the vision of "Imagine" and making his father proud.


This article originally appeared three years ago. It has been updated.

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Family

Mom admits she isn't perfect in a hilarious self-made 'back-to-school’ sign

She was exhausted before the first bell rang.

via Pexels

First day of school can be exhausting … but for who?

It’s back-to-school time, and that means new school supplies, a trip to Target for clothes, and social media channels flooded with photos of kids holding chalkboards. Over the past decade, back-to-school photos with kids standing on their doorsteps with signs with their name, grade, year, and teacher have been ubiquitous on social media.

There’s nothing wrong with the photos, they’re a cute way for parents and kids to mark the passage of time. For most parents, it’s a way to remember that it all goes by way too fast. However, for the “perfect” parents out there who like to flaunt their Instagrammable lifestyle, they’re another way to show off their “flawless” first days on social media.

In an attempt to show parents they don't have to fall for the myth of perfection on social media, Jeni Bukolt—a mother of two boys age 8 and 12 from Waxhaw, North Carolina—posted a first-day photo of herself looking burnt out and wearing sunglasses. School hadn’t even begun yet.

"Mom's first day of school,” the handmade sign read. "I am 42 years tired. I'll probably miss a school 'theme' day. I really like sleep. Please don't ask me to volunteer. But I will buy you supplies."



"I make signs for my kids each year but lately I've thought about how I always feel behind, as though I'm failing (in some way)," Bukolt told Today. Clearly, other parents feel the same because it was a hit with a lot of them on Instagram.

A lot of comments were from parents who thought the photo was a breath of fresh air during a stressful time of year. "Brilliant, you speak for millions!" cathycole wrote. "May we all survive the drop off/pick up lane," merakifitnessandpole added.

"I thought maybe if I can create a lighthearted moment, some other moms will laugh and understand we're all in this kind of struggle together. Like, let's have empathy for each other," Bukolt told Good Morning America.

Bukolt hopes her post builds an “empathy bridge” between parents. She’d also like to shine a little reality on the parents who feel judged on social media.

"I also feel like when you look at social media, there's all these, [picture perfect] worlds,” she added. “It's not the true story. And some people think like, 'Oh, they have it better or they're perfect,' and this is an opportunity to say no, we're all real human beings ... we're all in the struggle together."

But of course, there were some humorless parents who thought her post wasn’t supportive of teachers or her two sons. So Bukolt made a follow-up where she explained that she was just having fun.

“For the keyboard warriors… yes I do have a job, yes I love my kids and no, I don’t hate teachers. Back to work. Have a great day!” she wrote.


The next year, Bukolt returned with another sign where she said she's "43 years tired," has a "new sleep routine," and please don't ask her to do any math. "Liam asked me about division last night. I know that common core math should be easier, but apparently I am NOT smarter than a 4th grader," she joked in the comments.



Parenting is hard and we all fall short of glory at times. Kudos to Bukolt for making us feel a little less alone and letting us know that some folks have already accepted their imperfections on the first day.

"If other moms can get a good laugh about it, then that makes my heart happy," she said.

This article originally appeared three years ago.

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