Linguist explains simple reason Boomers use ellipses in texts all the time
One generation's texting habit that baffles every generation is the Boomers' seemingly excessive use of ellipses. Do you have more to say, Aunt Judy, or did you just accidentally press the period key too many times? Maybe it's for a dramatic pause or to put emphasis on a point? This is truly a mystery that leaves every generation below them confused about what is meant by the dreaded "dot dot dot."
Texting etiquette differs with every generation. Gen X and most Millennials use fairly proper grammar and punctuation throughout a text message exchange. Every new sentence starts with a capital letter, there are strategically placed Oxford commas to ensure there's little room for misunderstandings, and sentences end with an appropriate punctuation mark.
Joyful moments captured: A cheerful day out!Photo credit: Canva
When it comes to Gen Z, they find that ending text messages with proper punctuation indicates that the person they're texting is being passive-aggressive. They also text in shorthand and emojis that can feel a bit like you need a special decoder ring to decipher the messages. But texting in an encrypted way can be chalked up to youth, though the same can't be said when it comes to Boomers. Or can it?
Harvard linguist and author of the book Algospeak, Adam Aleksic, breaks down why so many Boomers use ellipses when texting. It's surprisingly not as complicated or dramatic as one may imagine. In a viral video posted last year on TikTok, Aleksic explains his theory for the texting etiquette of Boomers.
Two generations connecting through their smartphones.Photo credit: Canva
"You know how older people tend to use the 'Boomer ellipses' whenever they're texting? There's always a random 'dot dot dot' in the middle of their messages?" Aleksic asks. "Well, that's because they grew up following different rules for informal communication. Nowadays, if you want to separate an idea, you just press enter and start a new line with a new thought, but it made less sense to do that for writing postcards or letters, where you had to save space, so people back in the day learned to separate thoughts by using ellipses."
Aleksic explains that this is also true for when phones first started allowing text messaging. You were charged by the message, so ellipses made it more efficient to convey all the thoughts in one message instead of multiple ones. SMS texting also had a character limit, unlike current phones, where you can essentially write a novella in a single message without your phone automatically breaking it up.
Today's texting standards typically mean people separate their thoughts by sending multiple messages for separate thoughts, though that annoys some people. If separating thoughts means you'll be sending no less than five texts in quick succession, it's likely best to just space down to make the text longer, rather than bombarding an unsuspecting friend.
When it comes down to it, younger generations have adapted to the new standard, embracing the unlimited text option, while Boomers haven't. Due to this discrepancy in text etiquette, the ellipses used by Boomers throw people for a loop.
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"That means the Boomer ellipses became redundant, which is why they cause confusion today. They violate what we call 'the maximum quantity;' they add more information than necessary, so they appear to imply something more than the intended meaning. Most of the time, that comes off to younger people as hesitation, annoyance, or passive aggressiveness because that's how we use the ellipses," the linguist shares.
So, no, your grandma isn't mad at you or avoiding telling you something; according to Aleksic, she's just trying to send you multiple messages in one. There's no hidden emotion behind the ellipses for Boomers; it's simply a habit left over from their younger years.
Thinking man statue with a timer.
Picture this: you're downing your third espresso of the morning, frantically toggling between seventeen browser tabs, when your kid tugs on your sleeve and whispers, "Mom, look: there's a rainbow outside." Your mind comes to a standstill, and for a brief moment, life's priorities seem perfectly aligned as you let yourself be drawn to the window. Were you "productive" in this moment? Not in the modern sense, no. But in ancient Greece, wise elders would be proud of you.
While we furiously chase deadlines and optimize our days for "maximum efficiency," we lose something profound that the people of Ancient Greece understood intimately: all time is not considered equal. The Greeks distinguished between Chronos—the relentless tick of the clock, represented by the many alarms and calendar alerts that make up modern life—and Kairos. These rich, meaningful moments give life its emotional depth.
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We've lost the plot on productivity. It's not our fault, necessarily. If your timeline is anything like mine, it's flooded with bullet journal inspiration, exploitative side hustles masquerading as "creative" outputs, and bros boasting about how they've "hacked" sleep, as if a person's worth can be measured by their output per hour. It's exhausting. And to be honest, a little weird.
The statistics are even more sobering. The World Health Organization reports that over 700,000 people died from overwork in 2016 alone. We are killing ourselves to reach an unachievable, unsustainable, inhumane ideal of "productivity," while simultaneously missing the moments that make life worth living. A cruel joke, surely?
Research shows that constant productivity isn't beneficial for us, with the risk of burnout doubling when employees work 60-hour workweeks, rather than the already inflated 40-hour work week. Hustle mentality has infested too many corners of our lives. Self-care has shifted from a priority to just another bullet point on our to-do lists. We feel guilty for resting, anxious during downtime, and put constant pressure on ourselves to be "productive." "Lazy" has become a dirty word.
For the Greeks, there was a different way. They had Chronos (represented in schedules, planning, and other concepts and descriptions that are used to describe robots, not humans), and Kairos.
Chronos transforms days into spreadsheets and precious lives into productivity metrics and LinkedIn posts. Its focus is quantitative, measurable, and indifferent to the very human desire for in-person experiences.
Personal calendar.Photo credit: Canva
However, Kairos, which translates into "the right or critical moment," is where the magic happens. It's described as a "qualitative time," moments where time seems to expand and a greater force—meaning—seeps in. In Greek mythology, Kairos was depicted as a beautiful youth with wings on his heels, running swiftly while a single lock of hair fell over his forehead. The symbolism was clear: these moments are fleeting, and once they pass, there's nothing left to grab onto.
Could you reflect on your most treasured memories? What arises? Was it the workday when you perfectly adhered to a Pomodoro timer? Or the spontaneous dinner with an old friend, when the conversation flowed like wine and time seemed to disappear? The latter is a "Kairos moment," or a moment when "time slows down or even stands still as we become acutely aware of the richness and depth of the experience."
Or as one philosopher puts it, "Chronos time management is obsessed with saving time. Kairos is about savoring it."
The ancient Greeks understood what we've forgotten: both types of time are necessary for a whole life. Chronos provides much-needed structure, helping us meet commitments and enabling civilization to function. Without it, we couldn't coordinate with others or accomplish meaningful goals. But without Kairos to balance it, we lose our humanity and turn into machines—efficient, perhaps, but utterly empty.
Friends enjoying each others' company.Photo credit: Canva
The secret lies in learning to dance between them. Individuals who regularly experience Kairos moments tend to report higher life satisfaction, stronger relationships, and greater resilience. These are more than feel-good platitudes, but represent measurable benefits that stem from understanding the true nature of time.
Luckily, we can use Chronos strategically to create opportunities for Kairos moments:
In our hyperconnected world, Kairos offers resistance to the tyranny of the clock. It suggests that our lives exceed our accomplishments, our worth transcends our output, and life's most important experiences cannot be captured in productivity apps.
A sundial. Photo credit: Canva
So, the next time you find yourself mindlessly rushing from task to task, take a moment to pause. Look around. Notice small details, like the light streaming through the window, the chatter of neighbors nearby, the fact that you are alive and breathing and sharing this precious moment with billions of other humans on a spinning rock in space. Kairos is calling—inviting you to step out of the relentless march of measured time and into the eternal now, where real life resides.
Your to-do list can wait. But this moment won't come again. If you're open to hearing it, the wisdom of ancient Greeks is still alive, and they're willing to teach anyone willing to slow down and listen.
