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Ancient Greeks knew a time management secret that could save your sanity

Welcome to the philosophical world of ‘Kairos.’

Photo credit: Canva

Thinking man statue with a timer.

Picture this: you're downing your third espresso of the morning, frantically toggling between seventeen browser tabs, when your kid tugs on your sleeve and whispers, "Mom, look: there's a rainbow outside." Your mind comes to a standstill, and for a brief moment, life's priorities seem perfectly aligned as you let yourself be drawn to the window. Were you "productive" in this moment? Not in the modern sense, no. But in ancient Greece, wise elders would be proud of you.

While we furiously chase deadlines and optimize our days for "maximum efficiency," we lose something profound that the people of Ancient Greece understood intimately: all time is not considered equal. The Greeks distinguished between Chronos—the relentless tick of the clock, represented by the many alarms and calendar alerts that make up modern life—and Kairos. These rich, meaningful moments give life its emotional depth.


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Why your relationship to time is probably toxic

We've lost the plot on productivity. It's not our fault, necessarily. If your timeline is anything like mine, it's flooded with bullet journal inspiration, exploitative side hustles masquerading as "creative" outputs, and bros boasting about how they've "hacked" sleep, as if a person's worth can be measured by their output per hour. It's exhausting. And to be honest, a little weird.

The statistics are even more sobering. The World Health Organization reports that over 700,000 people died from overwork in 2016 alone. We are killing ourselves to reach an unachievable, unsustainable, inhumane ideal of "productivity," while simultaneously missing the moments that make life worth living. A cruel joke, surely?

via GIPHY

Research shows that constant productivity isn't beneficial for us, with the risk of burnout doubling when employees work 60-hour workweeks, rather than the already inflated 40-hour work week. Hustle mentality has infested too many corners of our lives. Self-care has shifted from a priority to just another bullet point on our to-do lists. We feel guilty for resting, anxious during downtime, and put constant pressure on ourselves to be "productive." "Lazy" has become a dirty word.

Two types of time that change everything

For the Greeks, there was a different way. They had Chronos (represented in schedules, planning, and other concepts and descriptions that are used to describe robots, not humans), and Kairos.

Chronos transforms days into spreadsheets and precious lives into productivity metrics and LinkedIn posts. Its focus is quantitative, measurable, and indifferent to the very human desire for in-person experiences.

calendar, overwhelming, chronos, time, management Personal calendar.Photo credit: Canva

However, Kairos, which translates into "the right or critical moment," is where the magic happens. It's described as a "qualitative time," moments where time seems to expand and a greater force—meaning—seeps in. In Greek mythology, Kairos was depicted as a beautiful youth with wings on his heels, running swiftly while a single lock of hair fell over his forehead. The symbolism was clear: these moments are fleeting, and once they pass, there's nothing left to grab onto.

Could you reflect on your most treasured memories? What arises? Was it the workday when you perfectly adhered to a Pomodoro timer? Or the spontaneous dinner with an old friend, when the conversation flowed like wine and time seemed to disappear? The latter is a "Kairos moment," or a moment when "time slows down or even stands still as we become acutely aware of the richness and depth of the experience."

Or as one philosopher puts it, "Chronos time management is obsessed with saving time. Kairos is about savoring it."

How to reclaim your relationship with time

The ancient Greeks understood what we've forgotten: both types of time are necessary for a whole life. Chronos provides much-needed structure, helping us meet commitments and enabling civilization to function. Without it, we couldn't coordinate with others or accomplish meaningful goals. But without Kairos to balance it, we lose our humanity and turn into machines—efficient, perhaps, but utterly empty.

Friends, time, management, joy, secret Friends enjoying each others' company.Photo credit: Canva

The secret lies in learning to dance between them. Individuals who regularly experience Kairos moments tend to report higher life satisfaction, stronger relationships, and greater resilience. These are more than feel-good platitudes, but represent measurable benefits that stem from understanding the true nature of time.

Luckily, we can use Chronos strategically to create opportunities for Kairos moments:

  • Schedule unstructured time. It seems ironic, but book calendar space for spontaneity. Embrace the paradox.
  • Silence notifications during meals. Create protected spaces for presence.
  • Choose depth over efficiency when someone needs you. Remember that not every moment calls for optimization or problem-solving.
  • Practice "sacred pausing"—moments of intention when you opt for meaningful depth, at the cost of "efficiency." This practice is personal and can take many forms. It may mean truly listening instead of waiting to speak. Experiencing a sunset, watching intently as the warm, golden hues fade into blues, purples, and indigos. Tasting food, concentrating on flavors, sensations, and textures, rather than screens or even conversation. Choosing to spend time with loved ones. Feeling gratitude for being alive.

A radical act of resistance

In our hyperconnected world, Kairos offers resistance to the tyranny of the clock. It suggests that our lives exceed our accomplishments, our worth transcends our output, and life's most important experiences cannot be captured in productivity apps.

sundial, clock, tyranny, time, mangement A sundial. Photo credit: Canva

So, the next time you find yourself mindlessly rushing from task to task, take a moment to pause. Look around. Notice small details, like the light streaming through the window, the chatter of neighbors nearby, the fact that you are alive and breathing and sharing this precious moment with billions of other humans on a spinning rock in space. Kairos is calling—inviting you to step out of the relentless march of measured time and into the eternal now, where real life resides.

Your to-do list can wait. But this moment won't come again. If you're open to hearing it, the wisdom of ancient Greeks is still alive, and they're willing to teach anyone willing to slow down and listen.

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"Time affluence" can radically change how you view your daily life

Not enough hours in the day? This might be for you.

Photo credit: Canva

A powerful new way to take control of your day.

What does it really mean to be wealthy? Having a hefty bank account and multiple streams of income? A fancy job with an even fancier-sounding name? ("Director" has a nice ring to it, don't you think?) There are a million ways to answer this question, but before you do, ask yourself one more: Will that really make me happy? While many of us would love a few more hours in the day, our actions don't reflect that. Often, we as a society spend an inordinate time dedicated to money: making it and saving it. But what about leisure time or rest? Yes, money is important, but without the time to do things we actually enjoy, what’s the point?

A growing body of research suggests something revolutionary: that a concept called “time affluence” is the true measure of a person's wealth. Rather than nice cars or a corner office in a high-rise building downtown, time affluence is the real key to happiness and well-being. Time affluence refers to the idea that, like money, time is a resource that can be saved, spent, and wasted. According to Ashley V. Whillans, a professor of business administration at Harvard Business School and the author of Time Smart: How to Reclaim Your Time and Live a Happier Life, time affluence is the “feeling of having control and feeling like you have enough time on an everyday basis.” Her research indicates that those who value time over money tend to live happier, more civically engaged lives and are more inclined to pursue activities they’re passionate about.

So, why do so many of us feel like we’re running out of time?


Meet “time poverty”

Time affluence exists on a spectrum, with "time poverty" at the opposite end. While time-affluent people experience increased autonomy, improved moods, and enhanced states of mindfulness, those experiencing time poverty live in a world of constant stress. They remain fixated on work and productivity, feeling perpetually overwhelmed by an endless list of tasks with seemingly insufficient time to complete them. Research shows that time poverty leads to decreased well-being, poor physical health, and reduced productivity—yet why aren't we addressing this crisis? While billions are invested yearly to combat material poverty, while time poverty remains largely ignored and continues to worsen.


stress, frustration, unhappiness, time, time waster, busy, stressedWhy aren't we addressing this growing crisis?Photo credit: Canva

Our relationship with time reveals a troubling reality. Despite the rise of time-saving technologies in recent decades—from Internet to personal computers—these innovations and productivity tools haven't fundamentally changed how we use our time, nor have they increased our sense of time affluence. A 2010 study found that merely 9% of adults reported "quite often" having free time, while 45% claimed they were almost "never free."

Even Whillans recognized something was wrong when she, a successful Harvard Business School professor on the tenure track, felt chronically short on time. Despite her material wealth—the pay, prestige, and job security—she never allowed herself to rest. Her calendar was filled with meetings, but she left herself no space for leisure or personal pursuits. "Focusing our time is not selfish. It's really about making enough time for ourselves that we're able to have the energy and attention to best serve those that we care about," Whillans explained during a presentation in 2020. "We want to be reframing our time to see leisure as something that's productive and restful, and an end to itself."


The elusive concept of “time affluence”

Here's the paradox: having more money or time doesn't necessarily solve the problem—it can actually make it worse. In a study by Sanford E. DeVoe and Jeffrey Pfeffer in 2011, researchers found that people who placed a higher financial value on time (following the old adage "time is money") reported increased time pressure and showed less patience. Similarly, other research indicates that when people overly focus on time's value, they also experience greater psychological and physiological stress, and are less likely to slow down or enjoy leisure activities.


time, running out of time, clock, busy, life, stressWhen it comes to well-being, time does not equal money. Photo credit: Canva

But...too much time can be a problem, too. In a study conducted by Cassie Mogilner Holmes, a psychologist and professor at UCLA’s Anderson School of Management, she looked at the relationship between leisure time and happiness. On one hand, she found that people with less than two hours a day of free time reported decreased levels of happiness. On the other hand, those with more than five hours of free time per day also reported decreased levels of happiness. What’s going on here? It seems that the key to time affluence, which Holmes defines as “feeling confident that you are able to accomplish everything you want to do"—isn’t the abundance of free time or having unlimited hours in the day. “While having some time (i.e. more than two hours) is essential, the positive correlation between time and satisfaction only goes so far,” writes Barnaby Lashbrooke for Forbes. “Being time affluent, then, is less about having an excess of time, and actually about how you use the limited time that you do have.”


How to become time-affluent

So, you want to become time-affluent? Experts suggest the following strategies:

  1. Prioritize ruthlessly. With limited hours in each day, it makes sense to tackle the most important tasks first. Some people follow the Ivy Lee Method, which involves writing down your five most important tasks each evening, then completing them one by one the next day. Others prefer the "1-3-5" rule—focusing on one big task, three medium tasks, and five small tasks daily. Whichever method you choose, always ask yourself: What's the most urgent and important task? Start there.
  2. Buy back time by outsourcing tasks. While money can't buy happiness directly, it can buy precious time through strategic outsourcing. A few well-spent dollars can free you from tasks you dislike or find draining. Consider hiring a house cleaner or paying more in rent to live closer to work. As Laurie Santos, a psychologist and happiness researcher, says, "Studies show that people who spend money to get more free time are often happier than those who don't." But remember—outsourcing doesn't always require money. You can lean on your community, such as arranging alternating school drop-off schedules with neighbors.
  3. Practice “monotasking.” By now, most people know that multitasking isn’t real. It’s a myth—the human mind and brain aren’t sophisticated enough to perform more than two tasks simultaneously. So, do the opposite. Focus on one thing at a time.
  4. Be intentional about leisure time. “We want to be reframing our time to see leisure as something that’s productive and restful, and an end to itself,” advises Whillans. “Focusing on time is not selfish. It’s really in making enough time for ourselves that we’re able to have the energy and attention to best serve those that we care about.” Just like an important meeting or appointment, block time off on your calendar to dedicate purely to leisure and rest. By doing so, you are committing to caring about your well-being, and it’s just as essential as work.

In a world that's always demanding “more” of us—earn more, buy more, do more—perhaps what’s most revolutionary is reclaiming our time. And with it, our happiness.

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Married couple swears by the '3-Hour Night' as a relationship game changer

"If you’re stuck in a rut with your evenings — try this!"

@racheleehiggins/TikTok

Want out of a relationship rut? The Three hour night might be the perfect solution.

Almost every long term relationship suffers from a rut eventually. That goes especially for married partners who become parents and have the added responsibility of raising kids. Maintaining a connection is hard enough in this busy, fast paced world. Top it off with making sure kids are awake, dressed, entertained, well fed, oh yeah, and alive…and you best believe all you have energy for at the end of the day is sitting on the couch barely making it through one episode of your favorite show on Netflix.

And yet, we know how important it is to maintain a connection with our spouses. Many of us just don’t know how to make that happen while juggling a million other things. According to one mom, a “three-hour night” could be just the thing to tick off multiple boxes on the to-do list while rekindling romance at the same time. Talk about the ultimate marriage hack.

The three-hour night was something that Rachel Higgins and her husband began incorporating into their lives at the beginning of 2024. And so far, “it's been so fun and such...a game changer for how our evenings go,” she says in a clip posted to TikTok.

Before using the three-hour night, the evening would look a bit like this: their daughter would go to bed, they would lounge on the couch, scroll through social media, then fall asleep. Sound familiar?

But with a three hour night, Higgins and her husband divvy up the time before bed into three sections, each for a different focus.

In the first hour, starting around 7 p.m., is what Higgins calls “productive time,” during which the couple sees to any household chores that might need to be done.

“So, start with like a quick cleanup of the kitchen or just like things that accumulated throughout the day, and then we try to do something that either ... has been being put off or cleaning the bathroom or like organizing the pantry or hall closet or something like, super random like sharpening the knives. Anything that's productive for the household,” she explains.

@rachelleehiggins if you’re stuck in a rut with your evenings try this! i saw someone do something similar to this a while ago but can’t remember who! #marriage #1sttimeparents #newyearsgoals ♬ original sound - Rachel Higgins

Next, the second hour is geared towards re-establishing a physical or emotional connection in their marriage. The phones go away, and they focus only on enjoying one another.

“So, that could be things like showering together or ‘having fun’ together, playing a game together, or just like anything that's gonna get you guys talking and connecting or like debriefing from the day or just like talking about what you're doing and like the plans for tomorrow or like how work's going or whatever. So, anything that's gonna connect and strengthen and build your marriage,” Higgins says.

Lastly, the final hour of the night is dedicated towards anything Higgins and her husband individually want to do, any sort of personal recharge activity.

Since this is a judgment free time, Higgins states that “If you just want to lay on the couch and scroll your phone and watch TikToks or whatever like watch YouTube videos,” it’s totally acceptable.

Higgins’ novel approach definitely interested viewers, who chimed in with their own questions. One major concern was how the heck this could be done every night. But even Higgins admits that she and her husband don’t succeed at having a three-hour night every night—they usually try for about 3-4 times a week. And honestly, even once a week could still probably be beneficial in building intimacy.

Others wondered how to have a three-hour night when things randomly popped up in their schedule, like when kids won’t magically go to sleep promptly at 7pm. Higgins shares that in these cases, they tend to just shorten each phase. The point being: these can and probably should be customizable, even fun, rather than yet another rigid chore.

Plus, a three hour night (or whatever your version of a three-hour night may be) is a great way to remind yourself just how high of a priority your relationship has in your life no matter what else is going on at the time. Odds are you'll probably find you do have more time for it than you previously thought.

This article originally appeared last year.

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Therapist shares 2 big reasons why energizing hobbies are the perfect happiness hack

There’s a big difference between “growth” hobbies and “rot” hobbies.

via Pixabay/Pexels, Lucxama Sylvain/Pexels, Tara Winstead/Pexels

People enjoying energizing hobbies,

For those who feel like they could be happier but know they’re missing a key element, a therapist has shared her “hack” to happiness and it’s pretty simple: have an energizing hobby. The conversation about the happy hobby hack started on TikTok when marketing expert Harrison Swales noted that all his “successful” and “happy” friends have one thing in common: they enjoy energizing hobbies.

He added that instead of binging on Netflix or drinking all weekend, they were either in sports leagues or enjoyed creating things like books or videos instead of passively watching what other people make on TikTok.

"I don't know if it's directly correlated to your career and success in other areas of your life," he said, "but it certainly seems like it." The video went viral, amassing over 560,000 views and inspired a follow-up from therapist Israa Nasir, who shared the psychological reasons why energizing hobbies are so beneficial.

"This is literally the way to hack your happiness," Nasir said in response to the video, "and there are two reasons why this creator is totally accurate."

@israajnasir

#stitch with @Harrison Swales where is the lie? #neurosciencetok #happinesstips #positivepsychology #emotionalresilience

1. Sense of flow

"A sense of flow is being so present and immersed in the present moment, being completely where you are,” she said, adding that it’s a state where "mind and body [are] in the same place, and you're engaging in something that gives you joy or creativity or movement, boosts dopamine in your mind.”

"When we're able to engage in that long period of time in a state of flow, we have a slow, sustained state of dopamine," Nasir continued. "So that we feel happier for longer, which is the opposite experience when we do things like scrolling mindlessly or watching Netflix or mindlessly drinking."

2. Hobbies de-center work and romantic relationships

"If you think about it, your whole life is structured around work … and your romantic relationship,” Nassir explained. “So that makes us very flat and one-dimensional. By adding hobbies, we add more depth and dimension into our life."

She then had a message for the TikTokkers out there who claim they don’t have enough time for a new hobby. "Open your phone app where it measures how much time you're spending on social media and you'll see that you're probably spending three to four hours a day on your phone," she said. "So even if you cut that in half, you can make time for energizing hobbies."

So now that we know that energizing hobbies are a key to happiness, what are they, specifically? In the comments section, Nasir clarified what she meant by energizing hobbies, saying that they are any activity that helps you lose yourself or enter a state of flow.

That could mean dancing, doing puzzles, playing a musical instrument, playing golf, crocheting, metal detecting at the park, surfing, writing, or any other creative activity. One commenter compared energizing hobbies with those that aren’t beneficial. “I have growth hobbies and rot hobbies. You can guess which ones are energizing vs draining,” Curtis Lane wrote.

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